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Boss was in India demoing an app I wrote from scratch, minus a printer feature I insisted was necessary. Get a call from my boss: “I don’t need you to tell me you told me so, I need a printer and supporting functionality”
Being a dev in South Africa (at the time) meant that availability wasn’t the best. I drove out to a supplier, got the required hardware (on personal funds) and wrote the library. Had it all done and updated in 24 hours.
My boss refused to pay for the printer or give me any time in lieu. Started looking for jobs the same day.6
It was my last day as a network administrator at a major US telecom company. I was in charge of anti-virus for the corporate HQ on top of being a Lotus Notes admin and was working on a migration to Outlook for my supported departments.
Then, we got hit with the Melissa email virus around 10am.
The folks I worked with were some of the sharpest I've ever known. They got into the VBA code for the virus (easy) and figured out what it was doing (also easy). When Symantec gave us a virus definition, several hours later, one colleague changed the comment code in the VBA and the A/V failed to pick it up. I spent hours on the phone with Symantec support with them denying they were using file signatures to detect the virus. They eventually admitted they were but didn't have a better solution.
We took the mail servers offline, cleaned the message stores, manually disinfected countless workstations using USB sticks and met with the CIO's assistants several times.
Around 6pm the man responsible for my leaving the company took me aside and sort of apologized for being an ass to me. He said he didn't realize how committed I was to the job. I shook his hand, thanked him and watched him go home.
I went home around 11:30pm and came in the next morning, a Saturday, to complete the migration of Lotus users before I turned in my badge.
We had a client visit our PH office to "hang out" and see the progress in this educational type game we were building for their private school (apparently, it's the one that Obama's kids went to).
Manager oversold the progress and actually guaranteed some features that we were still working on and estimated to finish in the next 3 sprints (2 week intervals).
Client was due to be in the office in 2 days.
PM pushes back and says we need to manage client expectations properly.
CEO got wind and sat the dev team down. Dev lead, two seniors, and junior me. He sat us down and asked us what we think.
Lead says we can do it.
Now to be fair, I know this guy to be very competent and an INCREDIBLE programmer. He is the person I consider to be the first real mentor I ever had but I really thought we were fucked here.
Next day and half was hell--for me, at least and I really couldn't see how this was all possible.
But then the fucker came through. This beautiful, majestic meganerd and the two other guys shat out 6 weeks of code in ~30 hours.
And the crazy part was it was all working. Bugs were caught in the next few days for sure, but the demo went flawlessly.
I never doubted this guy again.
Years later, I'd meet up with him and would talk fondly about those days and all he could say was "I don't really remember". He remembers the project and that we had a demo but he couldn't remember anything around those days.
Two of the most stressful days of my life and to him it was a fucking Wednesday. What a fucking champ.4
"Why is the production database empty?"
Obviously, we had backups, but using the situation to make my employer shit his pants were funny. And yes, I'm still there8
I am not sure which 24 hours was the craziest one, but I will pick 2.
This one happened just a few weeks after I started working for the one and only company I have ever worked for. The huge-ass multi-tenant website stopped working. There was out of memory exception and nobody knew what is going on. I was still very new and knew shit about how it worked + plus my PHP knowledge was limited back then. Everyone was looking for the culprit but with no luck. Then the next day I finally managed to find a fucking infinite loop in our weather plugin.
We were working on a moderately big project for a client. There was a lot of work lately (on different projects) and we were *very* behind schedule on this one. Deadline? You guessed it - tomorrow. What was worse is that we couldnt move it any further, becuase we already did once before. So I had to work for about 20 hours straight to kinda finish the work. Worst part? Client turned out to be moron and half-scammer, so they are not our client anymore and the project was never deployed to production. Never again.2
!dev Story time.
As a sysasmin I had a client that wanted to skip some license fees and grow its infrastructure from an MS server bundle to standard.
Sales were all too happy to oblige, not giving a thought to what I said. Client said it should work, so client is always right.
Turns out they were running their bundle on a half broken server. Not much life left in there. Backup was made by pulling out a drive from mirror array.
It took hours to prepare for migration to a new server. Once it was all done, it did not work after the first restart. Needless to say that we proved that it was time to pay for the split. However I still needed to put that backup back to production state. Once I plugged in the backup disk it got some weird scsi id number - far away from the others in a 5hdd hot-plug case. As all hdds were the same and the interface did not show serials it was time to gamble. Mind that it was 2am at the time. So I did. My coleague went out to grasp some air. We did not say anything to the local sysadmin at the time. He told us another backup was done previously. Ok.. so I chose the source and the destination based on my logic at the moment. Chose to overwrite and went out for some air.
2hrs passed, time to find out if we killed the comany or not. Turns out I made the right choice.
That was my craziest 24hrs+ to date.1
Spent 20h working non stop on a project we were presenting to customer on the next day. Had a shower at 6 am and drove to the client with a colleague. We were presenting the features one by one. As he was presenting I was finishing the missing features and we switched every couple of minutes. Never again working for a company that sets deadlines on the first meeting with customer2
i had a 2-day, sat & sun, coding contest on codingame, but after coding for 24h my mother called me and said that her brother (and my uncle) died from alcoholic addiction
i did not commit my solution on that contest and now, for already five years, i'm afraid of participating in any similar contests2
Dealing with a Salesforce (what else,heh) bug that caused batch payment requests to be fired off at seemingly random intervals. Pretty big consequences to that one.
Of course, the problem is that no-one assumes it's a Salesforce bug, and you have to spend an eternity proving that it's not your fault...1
When writing my term paper.
Did some caffeine and teeine fueled rage C++ coding.
Codes over the day and night.
On a sunday until moday morning at 5.
Started way to late.
Fucked it up.
Employer want the software done in 6 hours. Must be robust , good quality and highly secured...
Yeap that's how crazy it is...1
"hey, how's the GDPR/'right to be forgotten' functionality going?"
"I think dev1 basically completed it before he quit... But it's been 2 months so I'm not sure."
"Well... What's the worst that could happen."9
Have 1 urgent, 2 very urgent and 1 super very urgent task at the same time, and 3 man arguing in the back of my chair which one should I do first.
Me: waiting and working the some little cosmetic for the next sprint1
I wasn’t paid for this, this was part of a school project I had to do about 2 years ago when I was in 9th grade.
We had to do something in biology and me and my friend both decided we should make an informational app that shows info about different kinds of birds. It was an Android app, it was before I moved to iOS development.
We knew absolutely nothing about advanced layout development and constraints and layouts or anything, and we barely knew how to navigate the Android UI framework.
We had like 5 days to work on this shit. We wanted it to look nice and somehow we came up with a layout that doesn’t look all fucked up between form factors and we barely had to code anything in Java, it was all just layouts and shit. But we knew absolutely NOTHING.
We totally failed. The project stunk so much I don’t have a backup of it anywhere and I am glad that is so.
Looking back at this shit ass project, I can see how much I learned in the process in terms of app development and my general knowledge and skills in computer science, 99% of it by teaching myself.1
Sometimes I feel like making a password cracker and hack someone's password using any API in a while loop6
Not quite dev-related, but I once had to migrate and replace a Windows Server 2003 Domain (1 DC) to a new Windows Server 2016 Domain Controller. The network consisted of about 30 PCs, 1 DC and 1 DB Server.
Eventhough it worked, I wouldn't do it again... 😰
At the beginning I almost deleted the old Domain Controller VM from the old ESXi host server, before any VM backup existed. Close one...