When everything works fine in localhost but in production

Kotlin beginners Tutorial

https://m.youtube.com/playlist/...

BusyBox knows how software development works

The moment of fucking blindness when alt-tabbing between a dark text editor and a white website.

I think if I do it any faster I'll get epilepsy

Just got BUGS list from our Client and fuck- 95% of bugs are not even bugs :|

- No, changing the (not pre-decided) verbiage is not a bug
- Adding two more pages in the app is not a bug (what the fuck :|)
- No, APK file not running in iPhone is not a bug (goddamn :|)
- No, adding these "fuckin new" functionalities is not a bug (seriously ? :/)

AND

Mr "used to be a good coder" PM,

Getting "504 Timeout Gateway" error because Server is temporarily down is NOT a fuckin frontend bug

And No, writing Javascript with a proper design architecture is not a "complicated" way of coding
and fuckin No, Global variables and functions without any architecture don't make the programming "kind of better"

ps: And VB dot net is not a fuckin scripting language, VBScript is.

Thank you,
"buggy average coder"

How do I explain to my PM that I don't want to come into the office because I code better half naked surrounded by soda cans and several layers of cheeto dust

Coolest project? Well, one time I had to take a dump while I was coding so I took the computer to the toilet with me and that was pretty exciting

Some nice tricks to save you guys some time.

For my front end developers: www.blisk.io

For my backend developers:
www.syntaxdb.com

Love,
A Proud Ranter

They probably should have made me sign a NDA, but I never did.

I was a wee little front-end devloper for a really small dev shop. The lead devloper, who was also the only back-end developer decided to quit. The company was in the middle of a huge project with Rolls-Royce aerospace. I managed to learn ColdFusion and release the application in only a few months. It was basically a giant warranty management application for jet engines. This is one app I wish I can go back and redo because if I had the expierence then that I do now... I feel like it would be so much better. That application allowed me to advance in my career, and 5 years later, I'm working for one of the largest development companies.

programming languages are not designed to talk to computers, they are designed to be readable by other programmers.

please code like it.

A normal person believes a kilobyte is 1000 bytes, a coder believes a kilometer is 1024 meters.
-Unknown

Client from a big company requested that all sensible data should be encrypted, passwords included.
We agreed that was OK, and that we were already saving the hashes for the passwords.
The reply was "Hashes should be encrypted too"

Fixing bugs

question = ToBe || !ToBe

I created a Clinic Wait Time app that shows patients their estimated wait time. These are displayed on TVs at all of our clinics!

In the future, when someone asks me what I do for a living, I'll answer
-"I'm a programmer" [1 sec pause] "I'm not a printer mechanic".

programmers true meaning.

devRant has had a huge impact on my life. My poops are significantly longer and now my legs fall asleep because of it.

When the stupidest people on the planet move in next to you and burn nearly everything you own to the ground...and don't even have the courtesy to wake you up before getting out of the building themselves.

Can we get auto-play gifs?

Honest graduation hat. :D

As if some of us ever needed a guide :-D An oldie but a goodie.

Lots of people seem to have awful PM's, so I just thought I'd express appreciation for my PM (who I found out last week goes to my church, which was cool). He regularly asks questions about how our system works so that he can be constructive in directions instead of acting like he knows what's up. Woo Tim! Ok feel free to go back to negativity time

<strong>be</strong>

Why in the fucking world did I decide to manually use @media screen in CSS instead of Bootstrap, I'm down to 212px wide screen now just because I can't stand that SOMEBODY might have a bloody screen that size.

My girlfriend keeps dropping hints that I should commit, but I still haven't gotten around to learning to use git.