Details
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AboutSAS professional
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SkillsSAS
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LocationBudapest
Joined devRant on 5/16/2016
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"We are looking for a GDPR expert to be hired in our company"
"I am an experienced data protection manager"
"Oh, fine! May you give us your phone number?"
"No"
"Your email address?"
"No"
"You're hired"4 -
This.
Not the worst but almost all of us (including me) handle strings like fucking morons.
If the input doesn't need to be an exact match we use a explicit comparison operator, when the input should explicitly match we do a loose comparison operator.
I'll format the crap out of a number, convert it, validate decimal places, check for float rounding hell, give it a absolute value and return it correctly formatted for the users locale but half the time I forget to trim their input. 🤦♂
Like I said - just a tad fucking moronic isn't it?3 -
!rant
The Sound of Typing (an original dev parody of "The Sound of Silence")
Hello caffeine, my old friend
I've come to sip on you again
Because my mind continues sleeping
While overpiled work is creeping
And the deadline that is flashing upon my screen
Can't be unseen
Within the sound of typing
Down the lines of buggy code
I quickly switch to debug mode
What kind of moron wrote this function?
For this unnecessary junction?
Wrapped in a condition that will always return true
I need a brew
To forget the sound of typing
Boss said I you do not know
WordPress like a cancer grows
A one page website doesn't need that
Still I wear my debug hard hat
And when I sleep I still see the same terror
Fatal error
Echoed in the sounds of typing
And every time I leave my home
I must launch chrome on my phone
The constant messages and phone calls
The chiming echoes through the halls
While I frantically fix some FooBar'd CSS
BUT I don't have LESS
Deep in the sounds of typing
And when I think I have it done
Some scope creep ruins all my fun
So now I force through an all-nighter
While I forge on like a fighter
But the project I thought was due on next Friday
Changed to Monday
Within the sound of typing9 -
buzzword translations:
"cloud" -> someones computer
"big data" -> lots of somewhat irrelevant data
"ai" -> if if if if if if if if if if if if if else
"algorithm" -> something that works but you don't know why
"secure" -> https://
"cyber security" -> kali linux + black hoodie
"innovation" -> adding something completely irrelevant such as making a poop emoji talk
"blockchain" -> we make lots of backups
"privacy" -> we store your data, we just don't tell you about it40 -
That moment that you get your first paycheck and you realize that you earned it with doing what you love and learning loads!
😍14 -
// LEARN TO READ, FOR FUCKS SAKE
I've been working with a teacher developing a web application for some business that rents stuff.
Long story short, he's so damn incompetent! I mean, for fucks sake, he sent me this picture asking me "what to do"... dude, just fucking read, it says that the VM will capture input and to escape just press right control!!!
I can't believe this guy is a CompSci Engineer...15 -
Wow!!! I just saw the new devRant upgrade in the App Store. Unbelievable new feature. Can't wait to setup tonite!!! Thanks @trogus @dfox !!!1
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"Why does the search take so long?" maybe because it searches through2 dbs with 20 tables with 5.000.000 objects on an 6 year old server with hdds and apparently there is no budget for a new server, but there is money for an 40.000€ art piece.2
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The moment I dared ask a colleague about unit testing, and instead of giving me a book or a look, he stashed his work, pulled over a second chair and we coded some, for an hour.3
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Everytime I see the tag 'geek' on here I die a bit inside. We're all geeks, you ain't special boy!4
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This is the most terrifying & horribly beautiful code ever.
:(){ :|:& };:
*please don't try running it if you don't know what you are doing.5 -
Big day today for the UK. I hope we stay, the future's bleak if we don't. I'm IN. Damn those outers.33
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What do computers and air conditioners have in common ---- They both become useless when you open windows3
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Around 2009 or earlier, I began the long grueling process of creating my own batch AI (yes batch as in Windows Batch , kill me for not knowing there were better languages around). Looking back at it, it is THE messiest thing I've ever created. Mostly because of how many unnecessary files were created to make the entire thing work. However, I’m still proud of it to this day because of the dedication I had put into creating the entire thing.
I would create diagrams on the mirrors in my room; of course I would be scolded for this. But I was mad with thought working through the entire thing.
I would scribble and type whenever I had the chance, trying to create the functions that would allow the thing to talk back to me. Finally, when it opened its eyes and spoke its first words I quickly started creating the functions that would allow it to learn new inputs. Over time and with some elbow grease I was able to polish it up to my liking.
The entire program branched off some of my more earlier programs in batch, they mostly ranged from the medial to the crazy; i.e. turning my computer on and off at certain times of the day, and multithreaded migration of files to new disks
It's not as sophisticated as other AI that were being built at the time, but at the age of 16 and with no experience in real programming at all, I'd say it was my first stepping stone towards more sophisticated programs, and ultimately, my decision in Computer Programming at all.22 -
I've been calling the W3 Consortium every day for the past week leaving the same message:
"Why the fuck doesn't CSS "vertical-alignment" work on all elements?"
Still waiting for them to return my call..7 -
Wrote a custom printer script in shell.
Went to test the script on some printers.
Neglected to check accuracy of script.
script is supposed to print jpeg.
it doesn't interpret it as an image,
but rather as raw binary in text...
^\<92>Q^H2Ei@0$iA+<89>dl_d<87><8f>Q
mfw each printer in the entire 5 story building
starts printing 500 pages of
RAW
BINARY3