God save the King!

Found this, when I browse through Twitter.

First of all, merry christmas to everyone on devrant.

Second, another interesting paper--this time on pattern classification using piecewise linear functions vs classic spiking neural nets.

Supposedly it was a *six million* percent improvement in computation time, versus the spiking simulation. Thats my five minute overview of the document anyway.

Highly unusual application (hadn't seen it done before now but maybe I'm unfamiliar). Check it out:

https://link.springer.com/chapter/...

Interviewer: So are you familiar with our company and what we do?

Dev: I looked at your website, looks like you build tools for managing restaurants.

Interviewer: No. That’s not even close.

Dev: ?

Interviewer: What we do is create an ecosystem of integrated data centres all orchestrated for immediate stakeholder utilization.

Dev: But the product itself…. it’s a user interface for tracking inventory. Of like…. burgers…. and bottles of wine.

Interviewer: It’s not a product! It’s a data……habitat!!

Dev: …

Dev: So does that make your users animals?

Interviewer: 😡. Unfortunately it looks like you do not see our vision and would not be a good fit for this role.

Dev: Agreed.

Fuck apple for making it as hard as fuck to sign in to my fucking apple id. Because my ex wife was my "trusted" number, I couldn't get an authentication code. Tech support told me it would take 3 days to reset my password.

After 3 hours of fucking around, I finally was able to reset my password.

I've been trying to get my kids to watch stupid Indiana Jones for years. They finally agreed. After going through 3 hours of BS so I could buy the movie, we start watching it. Literally, as the boulder is rolling down toward Dr. Jones, the movie stops suddenly so that Apple can verify my purchase!

Then, it asks me to buy it again!

caution: just some dude sharing a random story.

started my own small business around half a year now. a month earlier from that my cousin also started his career as a self employed dev with his own small business and we work together.

next year we we will start a company together, where we merge our existing small businesses into one. we are developing software on our own and we design and implement software for our customers.

seems like we are doing something right because we are reaching our capacities almost all of the time.

we plan to hire apprentices (hope it's the right word) and to teach them all we know to be able to then increase our possible workload.

you know, I do not have a degree or some form of education in the field of IT. And here in germany it was almost impossible to land a job as a dev. needed my cousin who studied cs to get me my first position in that field - and even with his reputation it was not easy.

this shit will not happen on my watch. If I see someone with fire for development I will give them a chance, irrespective of their background. And I will be more than happy to let that person grow and to give every kind of support I can.

we also plan to have something like "if the employee has a good idea for software that sells, we will support it and share revenue". got to figure out the details on that one, but I want to give the employee the possibility to grow some passive income out of their normal job - because for me this was never an option. and I think that this will motivate in some way 😅

just wanted to get this out of my head 😣

I’m quitting my job before they can fire me this time

I'm seriously having a lot of fun with ChatGPT and learning a whole bunch of things I didn't know before. The ease of asking it questions and getting a general idea on things is amazing.

Bye bye to my job, but at least I'll know a bunch of different things, I guess 😂

3 weeks without coding... haven't missed it so far

My company deals in finances.
Part of our interview process is a coding challenge.
It is absolutely fascinating to me how few candidates point out that 'float' is an inappropriate data-type for currency. SMH.

I love when employers reach out to you like desperate fuck boys on a dating app.

Tell me more about your “amazing” benefits package that’s indistinguishable from any other, your PTO that is as “unlimited” as my phone plan, and the empty mustard packets you acquired in series Z funding.

I’ve got all day to watch your dance play out its milky chance.

Friday 15:30
Prod explodes.

Typical...

??????????????????? What??????

???? What???????

I couldnt solve a bug for hours.
Hours of googling.
Hours of mental trainwreck.
Hours of stress.
1:28 am.

I cant solve it.

HOLD ON I HAVE AN IDEA.

ChatGPT AI. HELP ME.

i copy and pasted the part of code thats bugging me. Keep in mind that this is a VERY large and robust system and this is just tiny percentage of code.

I told the AI to help me fix this shit bug.

ChatGPT literally explained me what the bug is as if im retarded and wrote code how to fix it.

LOOK AT THE SCREENSHOT U CANT EVEN MAKE THIS SHIT UP

HOW????

There's this junior I've been training. We gave him a bigger task than we usually do

"How do I link an object in table X with the corresponding object in table Y?"

"How are objects in two tables usually linked? How did you link Y with Z in the first place?"

"Em... Foreign Keys?"

"Yup"

"But there's not foreign key from X to Y."

"Well, create one. You've got full creative freedom over this task."

I sometimes feel like Juniors are either completely careless about past code or overly carefuly with not editing any past code. Frustrating but adorable

I hate to say it, but GPT-3 has a point.

So a consulting company was hired to write stored procedures for us. I don't know where they found these guys, but the code was horrible and took ages to run.

We other devs weren't happy at all, but management forbade us to rewrite the code, cause the consultants would've gotten money for nothing then. As a "fix", these guys just reduced batch sizes to a very low amount of rows and management was happy that the procedures were so much faster now and gave their ok.

Fast forward a few weeks (to now). Obviously a reduced batch size means the procedures will run faster, but more often and it will take weeks to load all the data we need.

Result: Management ordered us to rewrite the SPs and we're all torn between laughing and crying.

Manager (via phone): You need to setup the CEO with access to the app IMMEDIATELY

Dev: Ok…What’s the occasion?

Manager: There is a big important meeting right now where we go over our achievements for the year and my plan was to have him log in and play around.

Dev: Likely would have been worth mentioning at this mornings standup.

Manager: Don’t be a smart ass. In fact, if you were actually smart you would have given him an account in the first place! So you’re just an ass then, what kind of idiot doesn’t give the CEO an account to an app like this?

Dev: Actually you specifically asked for him to be removed when I added him. “Unnecessary Optics” you said.

Manager: THAT’S BULLSHIT, I NEVER SAID THAT!!

Dev: It’s in our meeting minutes from 2 years ago.

Manager: STOP WRITING THE THINGS I SAY DOWN IT’S COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY.

Dev: I’ll make a note of that request

Manager: YOU ABSOL—ok looks like he’s waving me back in the room now the account must be working now bye. *click*.

Dev: Moron.

SNOW!! LOADS OF SNOW AND MORE TO COME OVERNIGHT!

YAYYYYYY!!!!!

I know I sound childish. I don't care. Nothing brings me as much sincere joy as loads of snow or even blizards.

linux wonders:

>su - otheruser
>whoami
root

fuck you!!!!!

it's one of those days where not even basic linux commands are working.... i'm about to give up, i'm so pissed off

While everyone else is working, I took vacation for the whole December. Turns out, that was a brilliant move!

I stroll 20+km every day in this beautiful, puffy scenery.