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Little fun story
About 3 years ago, my woman came gome from picking up our son from kindergarten.
She told me that she met a very nice woman - also a mom - whose man is also a dev (He is a FullStackDev, while I mainly do backend in PHP) .
She said that she invited them over for BBQ the next day.
In my mind, I was like "Fuck, now I need to listen to some wanker explaining me how great it is to be doing full stack with all the latest and greatest tools and bells and whistles why I am the fat kid using PHP"...
The BBQ-day arrived, we have met, we have talked, and we have been best friends and brothers-from-another-mother ever since.
Life is good sometimes.5 -
Today is my last day at this job.
Can't tell you how happy I am to be leaving this place in about 7 hours.
Starting my new job in January, so I get 4 weeks of nice vacation/ family time.8 -
Honestly: I love my job. Every day. I get paid to do what I love to do. And when I get home after sometimes 11 hours of work, I turn on my notebook to do exactly what I did at work - just as a relaxation method.5
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Best boss I have ever had?
He owned a car dealership and made me the first fulltime employed webdev in a car dealership in germany.
He believed in me and our mutual vision, and we had an awesome 7.5 years together. he gave me time to develop myself and to develop software and websites.
through my software and process optimization we were able to go from 300 sold cars per year to 3000 without hiring any more employees and without increasing workload and stress on the employees.
When I had my last day at his company, he didn't show up.
I was mad like hell, because we have spent so much time together, went to many countries together, even slept in the same hotel bed! I considered him pretty much a friend, even though he was my boss and 10 years older.
Much later he told me that he didn't show up on my last day because he didn't want to cry.
now we meet every 3 months and go out, eat and drink and just talk and laugh.
best guy ever, will never forget what he did for me.12 -
Junior dev: "I don't understand this code, therefore there must be something wrong with it. I'm gonna rewrite it."17
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Funnny thing happened today, my gf took my phone and started scrolling through recent apps, suddenly she sees devRant app and says, "What is this app? Is it the place your rant about me?"
All because her pet name is Dev! #DevRant15 -
10 more days at my current job.
then: 4 weeks off to rest and get my side projects online.
then: start my new job.
life is good sometimes
3 -
Client: I need this very complex feature
Dev : Ok, give me approx 2 weeks, this is new to me, have to do r&d.
Client: I can't give you 2 weeks, you have 2 days.
Dev: Somehow manages to complete in 2 days.
After few weeks.
Client's representative : What's the progress on the new features?
Dev: You haven't mentioned any new features yet.
Client's representative: I don't care, it's been weeks now, here are more complex features, I need them tomorrow.
😕12 -
Old man's tale. It's true.
Like 12 years ago, I was working in a small town computer store.
One day, a really ugly woman came in and asked for data recovery since she could not boot up her PC anymore.
We recovered her data, and just to make sure it was all "working", we randomly checked a few directories for files.
We have found some photos of her.
Her and a bottle of Coke.
Let me put it this way: she loves coke bottles. A lot.
There are things that can't be unseen, and moments you still remember after 12 years. Like the moment she came in to get her stuff - and you need to pretend to be all business while you're almost pissing your pants.
Good days :)7 -
So I have this best friend who is almost 10 years younger than me. (I'm turning 40 this month). He's a full stack web dev, nodejs-god, react-maniac, you name it. He fucking LIVES to code the most amazing shit I have seen to date.
I, on the other hand, am that old, little overweight PHP coder webdev with a shitload of experience in that field (17th year now), also with linux webserver administration and all the JavaScript knowledge I need in m job.
Sitting next to him and doing some fun coding sessions always makes me feel like I am that "slow, fat kid in class"... while he is the coding master.
Sitting at work (marketing agency) where I started as the new webdev 10 months ago, I still feel like the coding guru because even the web 'developers' don't know jack shit yet (coz they never had to).
It's fine, they are learning and want to learn.
All I wanna say that even though one might be seen as a senior dev by some, he might sometimes feel like a junior dev when he's around others.2 -
A Geologist and a developer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Geologist leans over to the developer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Developer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Geologist persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5." Again, the Developer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Geologist now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!"
This catches the Developer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Geologist asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?"
The Developer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Geologist.
Now, it's the developer's turn. He asks the Geologist, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The Geologist looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail.
After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50. The developer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep.
The Geologist is more than a little miffed, shakes the developer and asks, "Well, so what's the answer?"
Without a word, the developer reaches into his wallet, hands the Geologist $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.3 -
Ever since I started working at a company that has a real focus on software I have less to rant about....😒3
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Good to see instagram move to python3 without an exception. Literally that was smooth. Cheers to those who think Python is not scalable. 95 million photos on daily basis. 400 daily users.
https://thenewstack.io/instagram-ma...5 -
spent 7-8 months looking for work (did a few freelance jobs in the mean time), spent what's worth of days on LinkedIn.. no reply at all, talked to recruiters got declined over the phone after 2-3 mins of call time..
Applied to a company branch in my home country nailed the 4+1(code challenge) interviews, will be leaving this Saturday morning (in 2days) now the bloody bastards start to reply and send offers for positions they have, when I clearly have to decline as I don't want to be left empty handed..
fuck you Sam, Jake and the other pricks that decided it is OK to reply after 3-4 months.. go fuck yourselves with a horse's dick you piece of crap.. After you're done, go shoot yourselves with the gun for ugly dumb animals!!! Hate you!
Kind regards, dev-nope!3 -
I think I may start my very own indie game dev studio... For now as a one man army... That’ll be fun.
I guess wish me luck guys!
I mean, what could possibly go wrong?11 -
When my former boss let me go, he asked "you devs do not plant some secret code into your software so you can destroy it remotely, do you?".
I smiled and walked away.
Needless to say I got some money on top on my last day at that job.2 -
I love you. I live devRant.
All I need sometimes is scrolling through your stuff, and I feel better.
Be safe, girls and guys. Be healthy, and stay here. #OneBigFamily ❤️9 -
Client : We need this feature
Team lead : Sure, we will deliver this to you in 3 days.
Meanwhile Teamlead forgets to work on it or assign it to anyone in the team while he was surrounded by many other tasks.
Client on 2nd day morning : What's the progress on that feature?
Teamlead to Client: It's going fine, we will deliver it to you on time.
Meanwhile, Teamlead to a junior developer in the team (on 2nd day afternoon): We have this priority feature where we need to finish it in one day and deliver it tomorrow!
Junior Dev to Teamlead : This is too much of work to complete it in 1 day, it atleast needs 3 days!
Teamlead to Junior dev : I don't care, can't talk, busy, just complete the work and deal with the client, bye.
And the Junior dev continues to struggle where he is unknown of the fact that the task actually was of 3 days but just because the Teamlead forgot to do the task and also to assign the task early, he is in trouble!9 -
!rant, just wanted to express my excitement to someone
Not sure if this counts but technically I got my first freelance dev job designing an app for a club/small business at school. I have a lot to learn still but I'm really happy about the opportunity3 -
Whenever someone gets rejected for a dev job and the recruiter/HR person says "Our team just feels you are a bit too junior for the position at this time".. what they're actually saying is "We, as a company, are just not willing to invest any time or resources into training or helping you grow professionally."4
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Background: I work at a small startup company in Canada who makes simple FAQ Chatbots for companies who waste a lot of resources on the same Customer questions over and over.
So we were making this one bot for a provincial government who wanted a bot for students to be able to ask questions regarding the upcoming election and how to vote, etc. and get the answers they were looking for. Since it's Canada and a government bot, it had to be in both English AND French.
These bots take some time to train (we use Wit.ai mostly) in english so it was a challenge to train it in French. However I am bilingual (not very strong in French but can manage) so I did my best and the bot didn't turn out too bad. (English was great, French was, Id say, "not terrible").
HOWEVER, now that it is done (The company loved it, even with the less than perfect french version). The sales team (who know nothing of the process of making/training these bots) is now telling companies we support "SEVERAL LANGUAGES" and are currently about to sign a contract with a company overseas that wants a bot done IN JAPANESE!!.
To make matters worse.. when we (the dev team) brought up that it would be EXTREMELY difficult to do this, their answer was ... "You did it in French so you can just do the same but in Japanese"
HOW DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE.
Oh well, Rosetta Stone here I come, I guess it's time to learn Japanese.11 -
I happen to be the only girl in my small dev team of 4 males plus me.
I'm freaking tired of hearing 'hey guys','how are you doing guys', 'what's the update guys' in every meeting/call when one of them is addressing the rest of us.
Yeah i know I/they can't do anything about it. I somehow grew numb to hearing it, but sometimes hearing it one thousand time in a single call is driving me crazy.
I once mentioned it to an a senior dev who happens to be the one using the g word the most during meeting.
Me: could you please stop saying guys all the time, I'm not a guy.
Him: what do you want me to say, 'hey guys and a girl?!'
Me: ... -_- (internally: seriously!!)
Uugh.26 -
Not Dev
My passport appointment date was 26/03/2021 and i saw only 26.
Travelled 100 kms for this mistake yesterday. 😭😭4 -
been a win user for all my career.
started a new job last monday,and had to switch to a mac.
damn, that shit fries my brain.
all the shortcuts, my brackets, everything is different.12 -
So I never had a proper education in IT. Started web development as a hobby, then some people started giving me money for it, and here I am, working as a fulltime web dev since 2001 and SEO expert since 2010.
Still, I sometimes wonder how much I really know compared to some fresh coder who just got out of university.
I know how to create great software from A to Z, but still I sometimes get the feeling that I am missing the fundamental basics.
Is that weird?3 -
So yesterday I went to the postal service to claim my package(stress ball). While I'm waiting for the package the employee there asked me:
EMPLOYEE: There's so many stress balls here why buy one overseas.
ME: It's a dev swag I got free.
E: Oh I see. *looked at me suspiciously*
a moment later...
E: Hey, why stress ball? Did someone on your family got stroke?
M: No, it's for me. *smiled*
The after I got the package, the man looks like he wants me to open the package in front of him. Which I didn't do because I'm late for my work.
Maybe it's a first time here that someone sent a stress ball from US. Goodness. Hahahaha
ps. the man looks at me like I did something illegal which is a bit awkward. Hahahaha7 -
!rant
Whenever I open someone elses code, I do a project wide search for "FUCK".
Found many of these:
die("FUCK")
// fuck this
// #todo FUCK
Works on github as well. 😂🤣1 -
Le college freshman nibbas: Don't know C, Java, C++, python or any other programming language but want to do AI and machine learning!
💀🤷7 -
Since this isn't dev, I'll have to make it a rant:
I can have hobbies other than devving, goddamn it! Leave me alone!
11 -
I have a feeling that a senior dev left a bug on purpose to see if I would catch. Anyone else have that feeling or am I just paranoid?6
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TL;DR you suck, I suck and everybody sucks, deal with it....
------------------------------------
Let me let off some steam, since I've had enough of people hating on languages "just because"
Every language has it's drawbacks and quirks, BUT they have their strengths also. Saying "I hate {language}" is just you being and ignorant prick and probably your head is so far up your ass that you look like an ass hat. With that being said, every language is either good or bad depending on the developer writing in it. Let's give you an example:
If I ware to give you a brick and ask you to put a nail in a plank, can you do it? Yes, it will be easier if you do it with a hammer, but you have a brick, so hammer is out of the question. If you hit your thumb while doing it... well... sorry, but it is not the bricks fault - it is YOU!
JavaScript, yes it has a whole lot of problems, but it works, you can do a ton of stuff and does a good job at that, it is evolving through node and typescript (and others, just a personal pref), BUT if you used js when you ware debugging that jquery (1.0) plugin written in the free time of a 13 yo, who copy pasted a bunch from SO, well, it is not js' problem - deal with it. Same goes for PHP, i've been there where you had a single `index.php` with bazillion lines of code, did a bunch of eval and it was called MVC, but it also is evolving.. thing is all languages allow you to do some dumb stuff so YOU have to be responsible to not fuck it up (which you always DO btw, we all do). Difference is PHP/JS roll with it because the assumption is that you know what you are doing, which again - newsflash - you don't.
More or less I would blame that shit on businesses which decided to go with undergrads to save money instead of investing in their product, hell, I am in a major company that does not invest that doesn't care a whole lot about dev /tech stuff and now everybody's mother is an engineer - they care about money, because investors care about money (ROI) and because clean code does not pay the bills, but money does.
If we get all of the good practices and apply them to each language every one of them has it's place, that is why there is no "The Language", even if there was, we STILL ware going to fuck it up and probably it was going to be even worse than where we are now.
Study, improve, rinse and repeat... There are SENIORS and LEADS out there that are about 25-30 and have no fucking clue about the language, because they have stuck up their heads up the ass of frameworks and refuse to take a breath of clean air and consider something different than their dogmatic framework "way" of doing things.. That is the result you are seeing. Let me give you a fresh example to illustrate where I am at atm:
Le me works with ZendFramework 2.3-2.5 (why not, which is PHP5+ running on PHP7 [fancy, eh]), and little me writes a module for said project, and tries to contain it in its own space, i.e not touching anything outside of the folder of the module so it is SELF-CONTAINED (see, practices), during 2-3-4 iterations of code review, I've had to modify 4 different modules with `if (somthing === self::SOMETHING_TYPE)` as requested by my TL, which resulted in me not covering 3 use-cases after the changes and not adding a new event (the fw is event-driven, cuz.. reasons) so I have to use a bunch of ifs in the code, to check a config value and do shit. That is the way of I am asked to do things I hate what I've done and the fact that because of CR I have lost case-coverage, a week of work and the same TL will be on my ass on monday that things are now "perfect".
The biggest things is "we care about convention and code style"... right.... That is not because of the language, not because of me, not because of the framework - it is some dude's opinion that you hate, not the language.
New stuff are better, reinventing the wheel is also good, if it wasn't you would've had a few stone circular things on your car and things ware going to be like that - we need to try and try, that is the only way we actually learn shit.
Until things change in the trade, we will be on the same boat, complaining about the same shit over and over, you and me won't be alive probably but things will not change a bit.
We live in a place where state is considered good, god objects necessary (can you believe it, I've got kudos for using the term 'God Object'... yep, let that sink in). If you really hate something, please, oh god I beg you, show me how you will do it better and I will shake your hand and buy you a beer, but until then, please keep your ass-hurt fanboy opinion to your self, no one gives a shit about what you think, we will die and the world will not notice...6 -
Started working at 3:30am today.
That either means I am dedicated or stupid. Maybe both.
For sure, my boss doesn't appreciate it, so I guess that makes me stupid then :)5 -
Client : We want to develop this particular software. While developing it, we will be following Agile methodology.
Developers: Sure.
After developer achieves few features and decides to give 1st Demo of the software to the client.
Client : Wtf is this? This is an incomplete software, there are bugs in it.
Developer : Yes, you point that out to me and I will solve them.
Client: What do you mean point them out for you l, couldn't you do it yourself?
Developer: As a standard method, we often do unit tests, but we are not testers and with a strict deadline to match, we are more on the core implementation then checking again and again for minor bugs.
Client : I thought it would be a full proof software without any bugs in the 1st demo.
Developer : Software development is a process. It's not straightforward, hence you only mentioned at the initial, it's agile.
Client : If that's so, let's make it not agile and make you rot in hell for the next few fays. Now you next time show me a demo with no bugs, great complicated features and we will not mention you our expectations, predict them by yourselves, and most importantly, here's an impractical strict deadline.5 -
Confused as hell: Android TextView is equivalent to iOS UILabel, and iOS UITextView is somehow equivalent to Android EditText! 😡😡😡
Learning Android should be hard for an iOS Dev!7 -
!rant
Going to quit my job today.
Feeling bad because my bosses are great guys and lead a great company.
Feeling like an asshole...6 -
It must really suck to be a malware dev... "Oh look, the recent changes i made to my cryptomalware made it work! Sadly project file are encrypted too. Lets start over."1
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Sometimes you need someone to be your /dev/null with whom you can talk about all that fucked up shit going on in your mind.
Thank you /dev/null -
Dev: I see you have tattoo
Person: I do. Thank you.
Dev: I never said it was good
*dev walks away and person looks at their tattoo
I'm glad i got to experiance this beautiful moment -
These two strings walk into a bar and sit down. The bartender says, "So what'll it be?"
The first string says, "I think I'll have a beer quag fulk boorg jdk^CjfdLk jk3s d#f67howe%^U r89nvy owmc63^Dz x.xvcu"
"Please excuse my friend," the second string says, "He isn't null-terminated." -
I was talking to my non-tech gf about how a colleague of mine didn't understand priority queue and show led her an example, during explanation fucked up the example and duplicated priorities of 2 values but they came up in the unexpected order. She wanted to find the logic in it and blamed the computer for being dumb, but it has been ~45 minutes, she has Wikipedia about binary trees & linked list open as well as simple graphs visualising both + armed with pen and paper trying to understand how it all all works..
Achievement Earned?
P.S I am either creating a monstrosity (Frankenstein style) or recruiting a fresh mind to our ranks, either way I am proud af 😢😊😍11 -
@dfox I would love to have a "save for later"/ bookmark feature. I am seeing so many great things here and I'd love to access them later. Maybe something you could implement some day?
Cheers mate!3 -
Top tip back for beginners, make sure your dev and live environments are identical.
And do your testing in dev!1 -
As a junior dev I'm really frustrated at work today. My boss wanted us to complete a project within 3 weeks. The project includes a multi-tenant hotel system that includes reservation, invoicing, advanced reports, housekeeping system and an API. I'm starting to feel something about myself, I have no progress. I'm so slow. I love what I'm doing but maybe this is too much.
ps. we're a team of 28 -
What to do when you have no more faith in your capabilities and it feels like your ambition and drive to dev just kinda died... Thinking of becoming a cashier or restocking shelves at wallmart... (-_-)7
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Be honest.
How many hours of your work day do you do real work?
Right now, I am at about 7/8.
Usually about 5/8.18 -
Client to Company :This is a complex 1 month approx task. We need this feature
Company forgets to tell employee developer about this.
Meanwhile Client to Company after one month.
Client to Company: We are just 1 week away from the deadline, what's the status of the work in progress.
Company to client : It's going well, we will get back to you on the day of demo.
Company to employee developer: We have this complex task, you need to complete it in 1 week.
Developer mental status gets fucked with over burdened hectic work which has to be completed in a week having no idea of fuck up by the company which already had the information of the task one month ago but just forgot to tell the developer.2 -
Building an app in Cordova.
Customer request:
Make a fullscreen view to come up on every app start. It should have a button with the text "Start" on it to get into the app.
#wtf2 -
I always wanted to be an airforce pilot since I was a kid. Then snes came, spent a great deal of hours playing so many games. I got curious on how they were created and although I did it, I always wondered why people blow on cartridges if the game won't start. Fast forward to CS, Diablo 3, Red alert. I was fascinated whenever I type something on the console and something happened, that got me excited. Add that I was using wordstar and programming HTML/CSS in school when I was just 10-11. When I turned 12, I was programming using Borland C++. It just snowballed from there, curiosity and a series of my programs working made me focus a lot of my time talking to computers (especially when I built robots using lego mindstorms). While my classmates were having a hard tim deciding what course to take in college, I was already certain since I was just a sophomore in high school. I will write and talk to computers until I wear thick glasses.
So there it is, my dev story. Apologies for a lengthy post. 😀
1 -
Client : you are hired as a developer.
Me : we need more developers as there's more work and less time.
Client : Ok, here's another dev
(Meanwhile me doing my work...)
ON THE DAY OF DEMO :
Me : Here's the demo.
Client: it's incomplete, where's more work?
Me: that's the part of 2nd dev you hired before
Client : I don't care, I fucking need a work!
Me inside: (Why the fuck would the first dev becomes a task/team manager just because is the first one to join the project! Arrrgh!!! Hire a fucking scrum master to manage your fucking tasks/team, am just a fucking dev! )9 -
Best thing to be a dev
You create your own tools, problem solving skills that we learn and the best thing that non-tech people treat you as a genius5 -
My company have become fucking douche bag! I have been working overtime everyday day till late nights for 2 weeks including one weekend and I got a notice for slow work just because I was not able to work on the second weekend because of health issues. Fuck this insensitive shit company treating employees as a piece of shit!10
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Had to ride the train to Bonn, Germany yesterday to attend a Sistrix workshop today. Bonn has one of the worst, ugliest.and smelliest train stations I have ever seen - and I have seen quite many.
The hotel I chose over inet recommendations is a shithole with paper thin walls, through which I could hear the neighbouring room's occupant snore all night.
Now I am awake at 6 am, feeling like shit and haven't had coffee yet. My workshop starts at 10, ends at 5pm. Train home leaves at 6pm, I will be home at 10:30 pm.
Gonna be a long f'n day.
I hope the SEO people I will meet are going to be fun.2 -
tl;dr
I am either the most responsible or the biggest idiot in the team
----------
TODAY.. oh boy.. fuck today. Like literally tuck this day and this shit. We ware doing releases for an integration we ware working on for ~1.5 months ... Aaand things went wrong - I guess we didn't make a sacrifice to the release gods - finally at around 8:30pm, being pretty much the last in the whole fucking office after a few last minute fixes I get my skinny ass on my way to grab a Corona and enjoy the public holiday tomorrow ...
Aaaaand I wish that was it, it turns out some things ware forgotten by.. well everyone aaaaand shit doesn't work (ofc ffs, why should it).. I see a slack notif and the feeling of dread gets me a couple of messages back I promise I'll be there in a couple of hours tops..and here I am ranting doing shit covering my desk with "food", hating my fucking self...
Me and the Head of Dev are literally the only ones working ATM... -
Life is a constant battle of not knowing whether I want to quit programming forever, or if I just need 8 hours sleep.1
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How to waste money as a dev company, 101:
Give people ton of budget for their education to do whatever they want with it with no oversight at all:
1) Devs go to some shitty confs in places across the world that teaches them nothing (new) so they can visit interesting places on company's money
2) Go to a conf where you learn ton of stuff that can be implemented right away
...Then you come back, no time to do stuff properly, just "make it work" (or make it seem like it works), because of deadlines, poor prioritization, new features, bad planning, vague roadmap and poor client management. And the worst of them all, LGTM code reviews.
Few months later, who the fuck wrote this shit? Oh, dude that left? What about this mess? Oh, he's a goner too. What the fuck should this random undocumented chunk of code do?!
Do that a few times and you've got bunch of pissed off clients with a ton of bug reports nobody can solve without wasting 20x the amount of time it would originally take.. LGTM
RIP project.6 -
New dev domains. Grab them while they are hot. Only $ 11.5k + $ 12 a year!
(or just $ 12 starting from Feb. 28th)
https://domains.google/tld/dev/7 -
Dev calls are so awkward when you're waiting for everyone to join and someone insists on having a conversation
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!dev
I just had one of the worst Uber trips ever.
The guy is literally the definition of learning on the job except that the job here is driving people and he doesn't seem to learn shit!!
He opened Google Maps on his phone but never looked at it. I was directing him all the way. He randomly stopped the car completely a few times in the middle of the fucking highway!! He doesn't look at the side mirrors, he actually tilts his head left and right to check for other cars!! I'm glad I finally got to my destination in one piece.
The funny thing is that he was ranting on how bad the road is and how unreliable the GPS is. Is that how we look when we rant about clients? xD3 -
Will be leaving the current company at the end of the Year without being able to end the worst project I have ever seen.
Tempted to write an apology in the comments of one of the core files.... -
Non-dev
I'm really sad to see what's going on in the world right now, particularly America.
Millions of jobs are just, gone, automated away, or turned into shitty contract positions. This leaves us with huge unemployment, so people then are forced to participate in a race to the bottom for the shitty contract jobs.
Ridesharing now classifies its employees as contractors. Who does this help? The companies of course, cause they dont need to give anyone benefits or even minimum wage.
And then since these guys are contractors, restaurants and stuff end up eliminating their drivers since they can't compete with the lean mean ridesharing machine.
Soon most "essential" work is just going to be poor people begging for tips from their work because the companies count them as contractors and dont give them benefits or enough to live on.
Fuck this shit. I'm so glad I'm a dev and mostly shielded from this, for now. But it's upsetting to think of what the world will be like in 20 years as this continues.4 -
you know what was fun?
Back in 2012, I started developing an app for the windowsphone (7 back then) which was basically an offline backup navigation for pilots with a few extras likr weather data for pre flight planning.
It was so cool doing all this back then, because there weren't many wp devs out there.
Microsoft even sent me 6 different phones (straight from Redmond) to play with (and keep them).
Those were the days 😀😀1 -
Me - "Designs and creates a new staff page for work"
Result - "everyone at work loves it"
Me - "I feel really accomplished"
Co-worker - "I'm gonna use this design, that you made, for my interviews for jobs and say I made it"
Me - "wtf" -
Signing the contract with a new agency as their new dev in 3 hrs. Will quit my current Job on Aug. 18. Looking forward to that day. Boss will explode...5
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I never felt this satisfied in my entire life,
So I was working on an open-source org where people can come and read books online for free. But they were facing the challenge of making books text selectable with the mouse pointer. But the problem was that their website renders scanned images of the books so it is impossible to select text from it.
So I solved this problem by building a small prototype that could do it. All of the books that they have in their database are having XML files associated with them which contains the coordinates of each word. So the logic was simple - select a rectangular region to pass its coordinates and check whether the coordinates of a word are lying in that rectangular region or not and display them. This trick is helpful because most of the OCR generates a similar XML file.
So if you wish to use this prototype for your own projects - you can check my GitHub repository https://github.com/ishank-dev/...
please star it if you like. -
First Happy new year, now lets get put on the dancing shoes... (I have another one coming, but this one is fresh)
As a PHP developer (yeah I am and I like it, if you gonna hate on me... go fuck yourself) I expect to not be required to reinvent the wheel when I have to use something that is not too mainstream (in my case was producing JSON and XML HAL responses). Now there are 2 (fairly active and somewhat mature), one of which does not produce XML responses, so off I went with the other one, but for fucks sake it does not produce XML that is compliant with the (draft)RFC (https://tools.ietf.org/html/...)
So as I need that, I decided to write one myself, since extending the one that provided XML would've been a waste of time, since it is NOT documented and for some reason depends on about 4 packages (also developed by the same maintainer), why the whining you ask, eh? Well fuck this shit. It took me 2(+2 classes) to achieve everything (according to standard as far as I can tell) + went with using a "hydrator" as opposed to reflection (the lib used reflection and didn't care too much for the access modified on the property of the object being serialized) so got a pretty solid performance boost, cleaner and simple code (I wrote it for a few hours and it is ugly, but hey KISS and it works perfectly)...
So with the more ranty part of this rant... Why the fuck so many people don't write independant packages for the simple parts... I don't hate it when I need a package and end up downloading half of the codebase of symfony or whatever fancy framework the dev decided to use, wasn't it the point of having 'package managers' (composer, npm, etc.. you get the deal..) instead of promote our projects and not force others to use our favorite framework that is absolutely out of scope for their projects...
Fuck you, fuck me and fuck everybody... If this continues I will continue writing my own packages from scratch, because "you" asshole are too lazy to learn and apply SOLID and common sense; even if your life depends on it you cannot write a meaningful piece of code without "the fancy framework of the month" holding your hand and allowing you to continue being a dumbass that has enough brain cells to walk straight and remember that you have to go to the toilet and not shit all over the place....
FML.... Fuck this shit and that is the main reason my gears grind the most when I head "you should use *framework name* instead" or "don't reinvent the wheel", fuck that guy I refuse to work my ways around a framework in order to get things done, my boss aint happy for that shit you know, I don't get paid to deal with your crappy code or uninformed opinion..3 -
Found a Junior Dev position for fresh graduates but requires 5+ years of Java programming. Hope I started Java when I was in high school.10
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!rant
When I need an extra 10 minutes of doing nothing, I hit up my console on full screen, "htop" and leave with the words "ouch, this is gonna take a while". -
Sure I'll be the sole developer on this Facebook equivalent app whilst also being the lead dev on 3 others!
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I recently built a Mock JSON based REST server, that can help you out with API testing and prototyping without having to write any code for the backend, feel free to try it out, and star the repository if you liked it :)
Link: https://github.com/ishank-dev/...3 -
As a dev, knowing some basic sh** about your infra comes in handy, esp when it's Saturday afternoon and you realise your Thursday release f'd up some obscure integration1
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I have always made a distinction between a coder/programmer and a developer.
Do you think there is a difference?
If so: how?8 -
I started iOS app dev thinking there’s good scope in the future,now I hear people saying app dev is gonna die switch to data science. Tf6
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I'm in a team of 3 in a small to medium sized company (over 50 engineers). We all work as full stack engineers.. but I think the definition of full stack here is getting super bloated. Let me give u an example. My team hold a few production apps, and we just launched a new one. The whole team (the 3 of us) are fully responsible on it from planning, design, database model, api, frontend (a react page spa), an extra client. Ok, so all this seems normal to a full stack dev.
Now, we also handle provisioning infra in aws using terraform, doing deployments, building a CI/CD pipeline using jenkins, monitoring, writing tests, building an analytics dashboard.
Recently our tech writer also left, so now we are also handling writing feature releases.
Few days ago, we also had a meeting where they sort of discussed that the maintenance of the engineering shared services, e.g. jenkins servers, (and about 2-3 other services) will now be split between teams in a shared board, previously this was handled only be team leads, but now they want to delegate it down.
And ofcourse not to mention supporting the app itself and updating bug tickets with findings.
I feel like my daily responsiblities are becoming the job responsibilities of at least 3 jobs.
Is this what full stack engineering looks like in your company? Do u handle everything from app design, building, cloud, ops, analytics etc..7 -
!rant
Had to build an app using Cordova because... well, I am a web dev and know a shitload of PHP and a good part of JS, but no Swift or Java or whatever.
So there is a deadline set to like half a year after we had the initial talk with the customer. 6 months to build a relatively easy and small app.
So yeah, I procrastinated like one would do when he's got that kind of time left and not much else to do.
And yeah, I did work, but also procrastinated some more. The development was as expected, and I was well in the anticipated time frame.
Then I got a really bad disc prolapse and was sick at home and the hospital for (all together) 5 weeks.
After that, I came back to work for a week, then leaving for a (previously planned) vacation with my little family.
On my first day back at work after the vacation, I quit my job with a 6 weeks notice, of which I have to work 3 weeks.
I know it sounds like I'm a real prick, but it was never planned this way. I never searched for a new job. It just came to me.
I am still finishing the app, though :)
Why am I telling you this?
Well, I do that to show that there still are great bosses out there. My boss has NEVER spoken a bad word to me, even after I quit my job. He's always been kind, fair and understanding.
I just wanted to show that between all these rants about bad bosses and colleagues (which I have had my fair share of in the past), there still are some real gems out there.
Gotta my my boss - he's been one of the best I have had so far.
Peace out folks. Good night... -
I love hackathons where I have a team and all but 1 or 2 ppl including me are still programming for 24 hrs instead sleeping.3
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Boss thinks the CMS that another dev built over the course of a good year, will make customers say "ooooh yeah, I will definately come to you and pay a shitload of money for a buggy and unfinished system, even tho I will never be able to leave with a working copy of my website like I could with wordpress".
The whole effing things is based on an old, outdated version of a popular PHP framework.
Oh yeah, and I can not update <the framework> because the dev has tinkered with the core files :)
Yay.
The whole fucking thing won't run on PHP7 and will explode right into my boss's face.
Not mine though, because I will be gone by then :) -
2019 goals...
Launch my app in Play store
Build more projects
Make work fun for client
Earn more
Learn learn and learn.... -
Having my last day at this company today!!! So looking forward to the new job. No more customers I have to talk to, no more deadlines, no more fucking app development.
Going to be the lead SEO and e-Commerce guy in a relatively big company, with my own small team, finally my own office again - and less development (but will still develop about 20% of the time).
Gonna be awesome, but first, I get to have 3 weeks vacation to renovate my house 😁1 -
Intern next to me is given high praise for creating a simple VBasic gui for excel. I get stuck with Middle and Backend work. I wish I could say my internship is easy money (he can atleast) but I like the challenge.2
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Hey all devRanters!
Comment down your dev portfolio urls,
I am building mine so need some cool inspiration and ideas.
Extra points if it looks different from the traditional portfolios.11 -
(Day 1 of Database Class)
Database Prof - "Your final project is a program or app that deals with big data and showcases data analysis. Make something that can be used by consumers and has real-world application."
(After the Day of Showcasing Projects)
Database Prof -
(What he should have said on Day 1) - "Make something that makes me laugh with added data." -
When I'm on lunch I stop coding to watch other people code on youtube. Does anyone else have this problem?1
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Beginning my dev career in a few weeks. Now it's the time to decide which weapons I should bring to the war.
So, devRant: MacBook Pro or ThinkPad (in the same price range)?23 -
so am I the only dev that keeps a psuedo code notebook and then once all the pages are used up usally have a bonfire
also stay safe social distance and wash hands blah blah blah you know the shpeel4 -
Just sharing a quick interview tip which helps alot.
Recruiter: Do you know this XYZ technology?
Candidate 1 : I don't know this technology, but if you GIVE ME A CHANCE, I will,
TRY AND LEARN.
Candidate 2 : I don't know this technology, but I am confident enough that I will be surely be able to learn and implement at a very quick pace.
Candidate 2 was hired. And why? Just check the formation of the response from both the candidates.
Remove the phrases like "give me a chance" and "will try" from your vocab in an interview, always form your responses in a positive and confident manner.
Both the above responses are quite the same, but just due to their different formation, candidate 2 succeeded!4 -
!dev
What kind of fucking tentacles should I have to play an Am7 bar chord? How do I do the bar chord and reach 3 semitones up with my pinky, and two semitones up at the top of the guitar with my ring, and sound all of it?
Fucking aliens19 -
We used a javascript library before on our project. While reading the documentation, it states that you need to put the ajax response on an .addRow() function in json array.
That was what we did, but it keeps on throwing tons of errors. In the end, we visited our senior dev. Turns out, the function needs an array and not a json array.
I stopped reading documentations since then. And our senior dev stopped talking to us. Hahahajk -
any ios devs here?
i'm a fifteen year old dev collaborating with a friend and we made an app - in flutter. android we are planning on publishing, but on ios we can't afford to pay the $99 to publish. we can't even compile it on a hackintosh. if anyone is willing to compile our app and give us an ipa (or publish it), we would really appreciate it!!!6 -
Today I have seen of @Microsoft, @linuxxx devrant profile.
How should I search devs profile in devrant? when I had entered dev name with @, mostly rants were came of that tag name.1 -
Going from 80% development/20% SEO at an agency to a new inhouse position with 90% SEO and 10% development. But it'll be fun.
If not, I will let you know for sure.3 -
f**king stupid google, go f**king eat s**t. We are using .dev for develop domain in our company, and all of a suddent we can’t access our dev sites anymore, WTF. Bulls**t!!!!9
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Im having a sort of dilema. I recently started taking freelance work for web developement (and design ack) and Im uncomfortable with the state of the industry. Ill explain: Say if I bid a client for a simple 1-3 page site w contact form (a new page, not migration) My suggestion is to use djangocms, django, or just static html/css/js (ie bootstrap), which produces clean, fairly secure, and fast sites. Of course I can throw a templated unoriginal wordpress site together in a few hours 2 days latest, so I offer that option as a sidenote on the bid, charging almost 2x more. For some reason I dont understand they choose the wp shitshow. I explain all the reasons that not the way to go( which I wont list, if u dont know, u never used it. google up) but they dont care abt the details, they rather pay more for shit job. OFC I reluctantly deliver what they want, but as a result my portfolio is full of unoriginal shit Im not happy showing off. I have a few sites Ive done on the side my prefered way, but they not deployed and sit in my github for all intents n purposes unviewable to potential clients.
I want to be proud of my portfolio, and it to be a representation of what Im capable of. BUT, I gotta eat, and work is better than no work.
There are so many "wordpress designers" oversaturaring the field and it lowering the overall standard of what we are capable of. I just begining my dev journey, but if I cant have a body of work Im proud of, theres no way I can see doing this the rest of my life, and that makes me really sad. My love of developing, coding, and IT/computers in general drove me to change careers from audio engineering to web development, and the fact that this fucking mr. potatoe head of a CMS is slowly turning that love into hate really pisses me off. So Im ending this !rant looking for hope.
Your thoughts?1 -
There are few layoffs in my company due to COVID-19 and so now there's 3 times more work then usual per employee and fucking senior manager keeps on threatening that if we don't meet the deadlines, they will get us fired as well!
Have to do overtime every fucking day, also even on weekends, my life has got all ruined and couldn't do anything about it as getting a new job in this time is going to be a pain in the ass as well!8 -
Put this as a comment but felt that it needed a post of its own.
I ducking love my fuck (see what I did there ;P) He my little coding buddy, I gave him a little back story and everything.
This is Francis (although he insists its Frankie) He transpecied (a duck in a penguins body) so he always has a "short-man complex" little attitude all the time (unless its because he never gets a word in before I figure out the bug myself =S )
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!dev
I paint as a hobby and i think I'll go the github way and relabel the black colors as nightly 🤔 and whites as salt 😃 (!?).
Sorry, don't mean to be a racist, i practically didn't differentiate between people based untill i was told in school that we should not differentiate based on color or race 🤣. Everyone was just a human before those lessons.3 -
Hey guys i was thinking about learning web development, mainly to make web apps, I already know C# and C++, but web dev looks so much different, can you advice me some good resources to start ?9
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Just got an email asking me to review an IDE called CodeLobsterIDE.
Has anybode ever heard of that?
I am sure they won't reply after I have sent them an estimate $$$ 😂2 -
I love commitstrip comic. There are others like Dilbert, devhumor, turnoff etc. Some are not continued now like Programmers life, which was also good. Which are your favourite comics related to dev?5
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Looking for collab for making a dev portal just for Start-ups to collab with freshers and freelancers.6
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Just spent a lot of development hours today! Quite more than routine! Not even tired because had great sync with the partner dev! Cheers!
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After a few years at one company, most of the colleagues that take their dev education seriously have left. We had a mini community keeping ourselves up to speed as technology progresses. As time passed, I've noticed that I'm stagnating which is one of the biggest signs, for me, that I should move somewhere.
I'm now at a new company, working on a project that is in a much worse place than any of the project I've worked on previously.
I've done my due diligence and checked the company before joining, of course. And I've asked all the questions I wanted to know so I can know with some level of certainty whether we're the right fit. Sadly, that definitely didn't turn out to be true.
I'm currently working on tasks that any intern/junior can work on, while being paid a senior salary. There are a lot of areas in the project where I can spend my time more efficiently, e.g. stability, performance. But, it turns out that swapping colors, brushing some css here and there is more important to the client than fixing very, very unstable project.
And I'm not the share holder. It's not up to me to decide. The only thing I can comment with certainty is, why just not hire 2 juniors that can do the same work I do right now, instead of wasting my time/energy on meaningless tasks and such boring issues that I've left behind years ago. I've emphasized that being challenged is very important to me, and I'm given breadcrumbs to deal with.
And I'm unsure what to do now. I don't want to be that guy leaving just a few months after joining. Should I wait it out? I already mentioned that I don't think I'm properly utilized to lead dev and PM. I guess I should give them a month or two to see whether something will change?2 -
this.post != rant
Just had my first job interview for backend dev position. Hopefully, it went well. Not that much technical questions but the interviewer sure did verified all the things I wrote on my cv. Good thing I included my side projects, that way we have a topic to talk about. Hope ill get the offer. Yaaaaas!!! -
I work at a small company (4 devs, CTO, a senior, me: mid level, and a new junior dev). Junior and I handle the client projects and the Senior and CTO handle the overall platform and server deployments and such. Our senior dev just gave his 2 weeks notice. I was told they are not replacing him and now ALL of his tasks have been pushed onto me on top of all my already full plate. My issue is, although I am excited to learn about the upper management and deployment stuff, they (CTO and CEO) just dumped all these tasks onto me without even asking if I wanted the added responsibility and also told me there is no monetary bonus for taking it all on. Am I right in being a little mad that I was not even asked if I wanted it and it was just assumed I would handle it all without any bonus or monetary promotion?5
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Any recommendations for a dev laptop?
Going to be using Visual Studio (yes, yes...) and all that other Microsofty goodness, so it needs to be Windows. Probably need to run a VM or 3 on it too, for legacy stuff.2 -
Anyone sad/angry about Google discontinuing web hosting on Google Drive.
http://googleappsupdates.blogspot.com/...2 -
Quick JS tip
If you want to split a string into characters, you can use the ES6 spread operator
If you have
const name = 'react-dev'
You can just spread it like this:
const charsInName = [...name]5 -
is there a way to save the rant's image to my phone? (android user here)
if not, #featureRequest @dfox 😀4 -
New piece of code which should work perfectly and solve your problem but it is not working just because you forgot to remove an old piece of code you were trying to fix the same problem! Fuck my life!1
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Fuck Wordpress and all those poorly programmed plugins!!! How the fuck does something, that was magically fixed yesterday, stop working just 24 hours later!?
This feature would be so simple to implement without this crippling piece of software! -
Irrational Programmer's Response to Problems - "I tried, if I couldn't find a solution to it, then it's impossible."
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I've been spending the last few days reorganizing css, js files, removing old code and rename directories. Yep its that kind of week at work...
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while(true) {
$us->me();
}
Damn it. I'm stuck on an infinite loop and can't get out. I'm starting to feel unmotivated on our first project as a team. No financial support from client. Disastrous planning phase. I really do want to drop this project. But I won't because of my dev friends, we started this together. Another thing that frustrates me, they don't know how to use Git. If there are changes on the system, we have to transfer it through flash drive. [ill teach them]. I don't wanna go to the point that this project becomes toxic. So frustrating. This too shall pass.
Does every start have to be this hard and frustrating? -
In my first Dev job, it was a startup and my employer(owner), didn't even had the passion and vision I had for the company
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The feeling when the access to a system you need the most for all your projects are being deprecated. Mhmmm my tears taste salty2
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Any Web Dev or Design managers out there who interview candidates, should a front end developer have a Github for his portfolio or hosted on his own site? I'm torn.3
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hello. i'm a software engineer with about 4 years of experience, worked with c++.
a couple of months ago i started learned web dev, and now i have learned html and css, next is js.
i'd like to ask advice what on how to proceed, what to learn next? should i learn or build something? follow tutorials?
thanks8 -
Just discovered a public API that support perpage parameter.
Immediately try 99999
And……… it works!
Getting everything in one go!
Good dev on the other side -
first !rant
My touch keyboard on this phone cant keep up w/ how fast I feel I need to type, so everytime after I blindly hit post I have to go back in my message, fix typo, then post, just to notice another f*@&ing typo I missed and have to do it all again. I know I should just slow down and do right in the first place, but when I try I get like this little internal anxiety that makes me uncomfortable and forces me to go faster. Maybe too much coffee...1 -
A cool script to automate copy and paste of commands from the web to the terminal
Usually, we do
1.Copy the command
2. Open the terminal
3. Paste the content copied into the terminal
4. Write password in case the command starts with sudo
My script does all that with one press of a shortcut.
Below is the link in case you like the idea of this automation
https://github.com/ishank-dev/...5 -
!rant
I'm thinking about getting into Android dev soon, can anyone recommend a simple (if possible video) tutorial series to get started?
I will be watching 'TheNewBoston' but I'd be interested in your suggested sources.
Thanks2 -
I added a class to our data classes that could be represented as a button in the dataview in the GUI instead of creating a proper UI for my problem
- It was quick
- I wasn't a full dev yet (more a student) and didn't want to learn how to create a GUI
- I saw it used in different places by more experienced devs even though I put a comment some time later to not use it because it breaks several concepts
- I get annoyed everytime I see it now ^^ -
Not dev related, assuming that here is a lot of people interested in history , philosophy, books I would like to ask for recommendations for:
YouTube channels or site related to history, books reviews/recommendations (dev and non-dev related), philosophy.
Thanks. :)6 -
!dev
How did you guys deal with graduation year stress? Seriously, how? Asking for myself because I'm not gonna risk eating pills or killing myself over sleep deprivation.4 -
!DEV
My mice stopped moving "efortlessly".
So I added a bit of scotch. Mice is working again very well and you don;t feel the drag !!
Yeah I should update my keyboard / mice, as they are in horrible state.3 -
today, in one of my main projects, I did a
"git add ."
left the office 6 hours later. it was still adding.
fml.... -
Blessed with a best boss and the worst client! Literally got a fucking rude and stupid client, who often tries to mock developers in the team, but got a great boss who saves your ass like a pro and doesn't let your self confidence and motivation crash at any point of time!
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What's the optimal dev to non-dev ratio at a workplace?
I switched from a 1:65-ish ratio to 1.5:2.5 ratio this year, and it was an improvement by all means. But I still feel so very alone, struggling with my many dev-related questions and really no one to discuss them with.
Under what ratio do you prefer to work? -
Soon launching a social networking app just for devs. Post Dev memes, Collab, rant, brainstorm over ideas, reach out to anyone for chat, post your cool devspace pictures and earn rewards. Stay tuned!
Ps- I know there are many similar platforms, this is just a project I developed learning coding app development so just don't brag me about the concept. Although, a better UI/UX never hurts!
The project is fully coded by me and am open for Sr. Devs collabs for the project.16 -
I would like to ask for some advice, thanks for your time in advance.
I've made a few applications over the last few years that were at first side projects. Right now they are doing quite well but could do way better if I put all my time into them (currently working in a agency)
My parents are still in the 90s when it comes to the internet so they never get behind any of my projects or they just pass it off as fluff.
I've showed my Dad my Analytics and what not and because it's not money it's nothing to him.
Any advice on how I deal with parents still living in times before the modern internet & make them see my stuff for what it is?.
Thanks7 -
For our internship requirement. We developed a web-app with inline Javascript and CSS. I know, it was only a matter of time for our senior dev to kill us. HAHAHAHA2
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!dev
Sorry for the non-dev question, but does anyone know of any good emulators for PS4?
Help me plis, I wanna play horizon: zero dawn1 -
Designed and worked on a website with no help and no assistance from the "head programmer" since he was leaving.
He told me he could have done what I have done since "you programmed it in bootstraps"
(Check tag for response)
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