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Search - "cars are hard"
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Wrote my friend Sam a letter when I was still working in support. I think it still holds up today.
---
Dear Sam,
I understand that you will join us in our overseas office. Congratulations on landing that job. It’s good steady work. I’ve been doing it for the last ten years.
Your still young so maybe I can give you some little wisdom that will help you in your working years to come.
Let me begin by shedding some light on phone calls.
I try. I really do try Sam. But it is getting so hard for me to hold back the rage that builds up during certain phone calls. Especially the ‘Sorry, I just don’t know anything about computers! -giggle-’ ones.
Those are the times that I have no access to what they see. I’ve no team-viewer, can not take over that screen in any other way. And why-oh-why can I not take over that terminal session dear Sam? It’s because the caller can not double-click an icon or find a terminal session number.
And what is the reason for this? Because they ‘just don’t know anything about computers! -giggle-’. This is a sort of get-out-of-jail-free card. Beware of these callers Sam.
There is nothing so nerve-wrecking then finding yourself at the mercy of people describing Internet Explorer (do not even get me started) as ‘the big ‘E’, if they use Chrome for their webmail then they most likely will say ‘Mail’ if they mean Chrome. There is no logic Sam. That is just the way these people work.
They will suck all enjoyment out of your work. They will make you want to hunt them down in dark office hallways and show them your tears Sam. Because cry you will.
Sure, I understand that not everyone can be tech savvy. Why, if everyone would be, where would that leave us? No. I love the technologically challenged. They put the fiber in my internet. They make me LOL for real. After the initial anger subsides anyway.
But just below that well-willing folk, on the other side of that border… there they dwell: Management.
Nice cars, suits and iphones Sam. First thing a new manager will require is a brand spanking new business-card. It will hold his/her new title. Then an iphone or overpriced android model will follow suit.
Then they will barge into your office, holding it like it’s the next best thing since sliced bread.
Any manager will automatically assume that you will drop anything you are doing at the present moment to acknowledge the presence of greatness. Failing to do so will result in awkward yet fulfilling situations. I recommend that you do not take your hands of the keyboard and give only the slightest of nods after 5 minutes of complete silence and glaring.
Well… you feel the glare. You do not glare yourself. You do not break eye-contact with the monitor. It does not even matter if you are typing for real or not. I once clicked away happily for 5 minutes. I just typed ‘he is still there’ over and over again. Do not break down Sam. This moment will decide your relationship with this individual.
After the nod there will be a flood of words aimed in your general direction. You can disregard anything that is said. It boils down to ‘can not operate device’.
You then take the device from this person and put it next to you on your desk. You’ll ask the name of this simpleton, write it down on a sticky-note, slap that on the phone. Then you’ll write a random date in the not so near future on another sticky and hand that to the bewildered person in front of you.
It will usually utter some incoherent words about ‘needing, time or but’ (I find that ‘but’is a word they like. They tend to use it three or four times consecutive before you usher them through the door).
Now you’ve won Sam. Well… not really. But it will feel good, I can guarantee that.
This must do for now. A new suit is glaring at me for the last five minutes.
Felt good to do something productive with this time.
Take care,
Baltasar
P.s. I just noticed that there is some foam around his mouth. So if you encounter this, don’t worry: it seems to be perfectly normal.13 -
IF THERE ARE NO CARS IN THE SQUARES THEN YOU DONT SELECT ANYTHING ITS NOT A SUPER HARD CONCEPT TO GRASP.5
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Guinea pigs are not from Guinea and they aren’t pigs
JavaScript has nothing to do with Java
Computer science is not an actual science
Lawsuit is not an actual suit that the judge wears
Siouxsie Suioux is not Native American
Sugar gliders aren’t made of sugar
People don’t drive on driveways and don’t park on parkways
Carpets have nothing to do with either cars or pets
Gunpowder actually looks like noodles and not like powder
Coca-Cola has no coconut and no cocaine in it. It also contains no cola nuts
Peanuts aren’t actually nuts
Watermelon doesn’t taste like a melon
Laptops are usually used while standing on desks, not laps
GPU, as in graphics processing unit, can process things that aren’t graphical
Silverback gorillas’ backs ain’t made of silver
Rod Steward is not a rod and not a steward
Guy Standing can sit
People who say they can’t stand something usually can actually stand up
People who call themselves woke do sleep sometimes
Hibernation mode in Windows doesn’t actually hibernate anything
Kool Aid can be served hot
Wall sockets can be used while not being attached to a wall
WC is not a closet
MrBeast is in fact human
Dodge cars aren’t better at dodging things than other cars
Some AC units can be operated using DC
Most men don’t menstruate
Pop bottles don’t always go pop
Backpack can be used while not being worn on your back
Watches don’t watch anything
Some keyboards aren’t actually a single board
Cigarettes have cigars, but cassettes don’t have cass, and Gillette doesn’t have gills
Dyson doesn’t make Dyson spheres
Hairdryers can dry things that aren’t hair
Beds aren’t usually made of bedrock
ThinkPads can’t think
MacBooks aren’t books
Ceilings don’t ceil
Platinum records aren’t made of platinum
Training doesn’t always involve trains
Great Britain ain’t that great
HDMI can carry signal that isn’t HD
Fingers do fing but autists don’t aut
American Football band doesn’t play american football
Taylor Swift is neither a taylor nor a swift
Hard disk drive doesn’t drive
Tank tops has nothing to do with the top part of a tank
Tea bags do sometimes contain herbs that aren’t tea
Tea isn’t usually teal
Jack Black isn’t black
Fingernails aren’t nails32 -
I just found out my parents have less than $30 in the bank by the end of each month after all expenses...
We are not living. We are barely surviving....
Every day in my house it is dark and the lights are off. They turn all lights off in order to avoid getting a high electricity bill. I have to use my phone's flashlight as the main source of light in my own house, as if i live in abandoned cottage in the middle of a forest.....
Both my parents are jobless (have been their entire lives). They just borrow money from their family members and grandparents to pay these bills every month. They depended on luck their whole lives. A luck in context of "maybe if i dont work anything at all then a huge pile of money will fall down from the sky!".
So now I, as their son, have to grow up in extreme poverty and fight my way up, because of DUMB, STUPID people. They are good people, but what does being a good person bring if you are fucking stupid and valueless?
I knew i was poor but today i found out i was THIS poor. I had no idea we were THIS much poor. Because today my 4g internet got cut off due to not paying bills. The bill is $30. My dad cant pay it cause he doesnt have $30 in the bank. I was in shock. So i had to pay it
My $8.125 usd an hour backend software engineer + DevOps engineer (2 jobs in 1), is considered as LUXURIOUS SALARY, in the most corrupted country of Europe -- SERBIA 🇷🇸
When i tell the world i make $8 an hour with a computer science degree working as a software engineer, they laugh at me. People mock me "bro even a mcdonalds worker earns $17/hour what are you doing" im doing what i was born into -- born into poverty of a third world shithole country.
With my $8 an hour salary, i am in TOP 3% of the HIGHEST earners in serbia. Can you fucking imagine how miserable lives do people live if this is not even an average salary, but among the ELITE salary? Because the average salary in Serbia, is $3.75 usd an hour, sometimes even less than that.
When people say "its not about luck its about hard work", please, GO. FUCK. YOURSELF.
Go and be born in a shithole third world country. Now on top of that be born in poverty due to poor decisions of your parents. Go ahead and try it. Lets see how hard you fucking have to work to get to the same level compared to someone who was born into for example America, where you get paid 6 figures immediately after graduating computer science. Or on top of that, you're born in a wealthy family in america. Did you work hard to be born in the 1st class freak show or were you LUCKY to be gifted such life?
My whole life i have been fighting to get money and escape this misery due to poor decisions of my parents.
Very ironically, my parents have lived extremely luxurious lives in the 90s. They had 5 cars. 1 huge house with a backyard garage private office private jacuzzi private gym. This house was worth at least 500k in the 90s. Today this house would cost at least 1.5 or 2 million. They went to luxurious travels. Hotels of $5000 per night per person. Literally wasted 45k in 3 days just for hotel. They even GAVE AWAY FOR FREE money to our relatives and cousins, taking them on luxurious vacations for free etc. None of those people appreciated them, none of them came to help them in tough times, everyone forgot about them and abandoned us.
Like i said, my parents are good people, but what does it profit being a good person if you are FUCKING STUPID.
They were extremely LUCKY but their STUPIDNESS has made them broke. I couldn't be THIS much fucking stupid even if i tried hard.
Nobody is coming to save us. No one cares. Its all up to me now. All the pressure and stress and poverty is passed and inherited onto my life now. its up to me to either get rich or end my STUPID bloodline
I am living a very difficult life and no one seems to understand this...26 -
🌎🌏🌍
The world needs to know the truth
👁️👁️👁️
🔥🔥🔥
Have to make a separate rant for this cause it deserves to be outlined and for the whole world to know the truth about my junkhole trash country Serbia (europe)
🔥🔥🔥
$1000 usd is 6 figures in my currency.
In economy schools they said
If you earn $1200/month usd in serbia you are in TOP 3% of highest earners
If you earn $2500/month usd in serbia you are in TOP 1% of highest earners
This must mean that i am now in TOP what 10% of highest earners in my country?
A bearly over 10,000$ usd a year, is TOP 10% of earners in Serbia. And i have to work 2 or perhaps 3 dev jobs as 1 person to be fortunate enough to be in those TOP 10%
And every day i keep seeing multiple 5 figure and 6 figure USD expensive cars, lambos ferraris brabus g wagons audi rs7 mercedes s class (2023) porsches, and when I say porsches people here LOVE porsches so much more than any other fucking car that porsche has became the most common car here that people drive! A used Porsche is at minimum 80,000$ usd!!! Thats 8+ years working my job, assuming im not spending 1 single cent, just to buy a used porsche, while hundreds of people drive them daily!!!!
My neighbor sold his mercedes s class and bought a GLS AMG 2023 brand new for over 225,000 fucking $!!!! Thats over 225 YEARS OF MY LIFE working this matrix job without spending a cent to buy that car. This is fucking RIDICULOUS
The world HAS to know the truth about corruption and slavery happening in Serbia. I will be the voice of truth that shall not be silenced. Anyone claiming otherwise is working for one of these corrupted shitfucks.
Incredible how corruption and unfairness sets you free out of the box than playing the matrix game. Unreal to me. I knew it was bad but i never knew it was THIS bad
If I was earning a normal wage salary i wouldnt be complaining. A normal wage salary for me is at minimum 100k a year. Or if i have to be generous then high end of 5 figures. Thats the only way to afford to buy one of these cars. Because how else do these fucking people buy them? Obviously not by working a matrix job
If you think i have unrealistic expectations then you need to unfuck your mind and realize that we are working a VERY difficult fucking job in this tech industry, SO difficult that a 100k should be the fucking minimum. Out of sheer respect towards this EXTREME HARD WORK, we DESERVE to get a high compensation in return -- not a fucking survival slavery wage salary bullshit! The moment you realize that you're underpaid if you earn less than 100k as a software engineer, is the moment you have unfucked your mind and now you have found the truth!18 -
Serverless and death of Programming?!
_TL;DR_
I hate serverless at work, love it at home, what's your advice?
- Is this the way things be from now on, suck it up.
- This will mature soon and Code will be king again.
- Look for legacy code work on big Java monolith or something.
- Do front-end which is not yet ruined.
- Start my own stuff.
_Long Rant_
Once one mechanic told me "I become mechanic to escape electrical engineering, but with modern cars...". I'm having similar feelings about programming now.
_Serverless Won_
All of the sudden everyone is doing Serverless, so I looked into it too, accidentally joined the company that does enterprise scale Serverless mostly.
First of all, I like serverless (AWS Lambda in specific) and what it enables - it makes 100% sense and 100% business sense for 80% of time.
So all is great? Not so much... I love it as independent developer, as it enables me to quickly launch products I would have been hesitant due to effort required before. However I hate it in my work - to be continued bellow...
_I'm fake engineer_
I love programming! I love writing code. I'm not really an engineer in the sense that I don't like hustle with tools and spending days fixing obscure environment issues, I rather strive for clean environment where there's nothing between me and code. Of course world is not perfect and I had to tolerate some amounts of hustle like Java and it's application servers, JVM issues, tools, environments... JS tools (although pain is not even close to Java), then it was Docker-ization abuse everywhere, but along the way it was more or less programming at the center. Code was the king, devOps and business skills become very important to developers but still second to code. Distinction here is not that I can't or don't do engineering, its that it requires effort, while coding is just natural thing that I can do with zero motivation.
_Programming is Dead?!_
Why I hate Serverless at work? Because it's a mess - I had a glimpse of this mess with microservices, but this is way worse...
On business/social level:
- First of all developers will be operations now and it's uphill battle to push for separation on business level and also infrastructure specifics are harder to isolate. I liked previous dev-devops collaboration before - everyone doing the thing that are better at.
- Devs now have to be good at code, devOps and business in many organisations.
- Shift of power balance - Code is no longer the king among developers and I'm seeing it now. Code quality drops, junior devs have too hard of the time to learn proper coding practices while AWS/Terraform/... is the main productivity factors. E.g. same code guru on code reviews in old days - respectable performer and source of Truth, now - rambling looser who couldn't get his lambda configured properly.
On not enjoying work:
- Lets start with fact - Code, Terraform, AWS, Business mess - you have to deal with all of it and with close to equal % amount of time now, I want to code mostly, at least 50% of time.
- Everything is in the air ("cloud computing" after all) - gone are the days of starting application and seeing results. Everything holds on assumptions that will only be tested in actual environment. Zero feedback loop - I assume I get this request/SQS message/..., I assume I have configured all the things correctly in sea of Terraform configs and modules from other repos - SQS queues, environment variables... I assume I taken in consideration tens of different terraform configurations of other lambdas/things that might be affected...
It's a such a pleasure now, after the work to open my code editor and work on my personal React.js app...2 -
!dev
Sorry about another non-dev rant, but I can't help it :p
I have seen a post here on devRant a few minutes ago talking about being a millionaire, so I thought I'd write a lil something for people thinking of chasing that.
As I said in a comment on that rant: as Jordan Peterson (aka Lord of the Lobsters) said, in order to be successful you need to be an industrious person, i.e. you gotta work hard, very hard. Most success stories are from people that worked very very hard (Elon Musk is one I can remember off the top of my head) and had to put their life, friends, family in second place. To this day I remember watching a video on a 30 year old millionaire, he said he didn't have friends for about 6-10 years, he just worked, worked and worked. If that's what you wanna do with your life do your thing, I'm just saying that's not it for me.
A few years back I wanted huge success (being famous, being rich), but I've come to realize that's not what I want. Being famous must suck, people recognizing you everywhere you go and shit, and being rich comes with a price (pun intended?), which is working every minute of your time for 10 years. That's not gonna make me happy, I have realized that I want to get married in my early 30's at max, have kids, buy a comfortable house somewhere in europe, have enough money to be able to give my family a good life and be able to buy and tune a few cars (that's a dream of mine btw), and maybe even try to start a company of my own (I don't like the idea of having a boss). And I think that to achieve these goals, all I need to do is be a bit smart right now: invest in fixed income, don't buy expensive shit, live with my parents at least until I get out of college and get a relatively decent job.
Anyway I might've steered off-course for a bit there, the point is: before you decide you want to be a millionaire, think what you actually want in life. If you want to be rich and are sure you have the willpower to work a 100 hours per week, do your thing, whatever makes you happy. But if you are going to work 60 hours a week and you're looking to be rich you're just going to be disappointed. You'll be chasing money all your life, sacrifice the (IMO) important things in life (friends, family, health, fun) and you won't get anywhere.
It's all or nothing, make up your mind before you waste your time.21 -
I have a 30 minute drive each way to work. This is an opportunity to relax and listen to my wife. Sometimes she isn't available and I just drive quiet. No radio. This helps me be more aware I think.
These drives have allowed me to notice how drivers seems to be getting worse. My biggest peeve being the tailgaters. It just makes zero sense to do this. My theory is there is a lack of knowledge about physical consequences to mechanical interactions. They don't have the frame of reference to understand the danger they put themselves or others into. Or they don't care. I dunno which. Probably some kind of combination.
Why am I thinking about this today? Because I have identified a new class of dumb driver today. Motorcyclists that tailgate. I had this guy get behind me and was getting a little too close. Then the guy decides to get closer. Plenty of room to pass me for miles. I think he is taking the next exit. I am going about 2 or 3 over speed limit on cruise. So he gets between 1 to 3 motorcycle lengths behind my car.
Normally I would be peeved and lower my cruise speed with the decel button. But one of my biggest fears is hitting a bike. So I have no desire to change my speed at all. The guy already seems a bit daft. I also am a bit comforted that it is a bike tailgating me and not a car or truck. Why? Because at worst this bike would leave a "conversation dent" on the back of my car. Some story to tell people. Not a big threat to my safety.
We go past the exit and he is still behind me. Backs off a bit and isn't tailing so close. But he keeps getting close off and on. I get to my exit and he goes past continuing on his way. Thank you for not going the same way I was going today, stupid dumb fuck.
Motorcyclists like to complain we don't see them. We do, and a lot of them drive like shit. Doing unexpected things like this. We see you bro.
Then I see this video today:
https://reddit.com/r/WTF/...
You can judge the driver all you want. I can see both sides of this altercation claiming to be in the right. However, the motorcyclist did one thing that is stupid. He chose to pick a fight he couldn't win. This is survival 101. If you are outclassed don't be an aggressor. What is interesting about this is the driver of the van may have thought the cyclist was reaching for a weapon and acted accordingly. It was already a bad situation. Even if the cyclist was completely in the right he chose to make the situation worse, much worse.
The driver of the van was arrested. It will be interesting to see what happens in this case. The comments in the thread are really interesting. The bikers in the group saying the cyclist was being stupid. Bringing a bike to a van fight. My initial reaction was against the van. Having watched the video a few times I see how the van driver could see the biker as a threat.
The bottom line: neither of these drivers were in their right mind while driving. They should have chosen to deescalate the situation and not make it worse.
This kind of stuff reminds me I need to not get all pissed off when driving. I don't want random people thrust into my life. People are nuts and they just gotta be right. They will go to their grave insisting they had the right of way.rant osteam is a biker drugs road rash drivers road rage high octane car tards your mom bike tards cars are hard bikers10 -
i just took a ride with my brand new bitch (3rd one in the roster) for our 2nd date. we kissed on first and now on second date she loves me.
while kissing, she cant stop kissing me. she said she never fucked a guy as friends w benefits but im pushing her to do it for the first time.
I'm the motherfucking slut maker.
I'm the creator of sluts now.
I take control.
I turn good girls into sluts rn cause my aura is beyond the universe and all these bitches can feel it by saying "i have that something" whatever it is
Now, i cheated on my blonde ex whore, and on my brand new gf, with this 3rd girl (I'll cheat on the 3rd girl too)
I will break as many females psychologically as possible and that is the price they have to pay for the psychological damage caused to me by my blonde ex whore.
I'm turning into a player rn and I'll fuckk all of them
They are all obsessed w me cause I'm different from the rest
They cant resist to let me fuck them
My aura attracts them
Because my behavior is nonchalant
I am on a great arc
2025 looks promising as Fuck
Also my current job offered me to work on another projects as a senior DevOps engineer which finally includes rancher kubernetes grafana prometheus harbor splunk etc, which pays me 4-8k euros a month
life is finally starting to become better but i went through Fucking hell to get here!
I got whores and i got money.
Im almost stress free.
The only thing left is to get more whores (3 arent enough, i need a roster of at least 10+ to be on the safe side), and i need to become a millionaire from theft in crypto
Then i fk 100s of whores all day and drive fast bmws
Btw i was driving my new hoe in my bmw late at night rn and a c63 coupe raced me. That mf gapped me! So i put sport + nitro mode on and gapped that mf so he quit
My bitch was holding my hand and said he gave up (but he actually let me win lol cause he saw i was with a bitch) i cant race a c63 coupe with a base model bmw bruh🤣
while we were kissing in the car (3rd bitch) i was leaking so much fucking precum (i fucked and cummed 3 times my blonde ex whore prior to this on the same day), and i was still horny af. this bitch got my dick rock solid hard
so then i came back at my blonde ex whore to grab my laptop and i kissed her, literally 2 minutes after tongue licking the 3rd side link
my ego is so fucking high and it will only get higher from here
it feels so good having aura, beast car and a roster of whores.
my day today was so fucking wild and random
my life is finally starting to make sense and become worth living
whores, money and fast cars is all i need in my life
(my new gf whos in love with me was the least important and she had to wait for hours for my reply until i get finished fucking my blonde ex whore and taking my 3rd link on a date and kissing (next date needs to be fuckijg w my new side link))
time to search for the 4th side link
I LOVE THIS💯10