My team handles infrastructure deployment and automation in the cloud for our company, so we don't exactly develop applications ourselves, but we're responsible for building deployment pipelines, provisioning cloud resources, automating their deployments, etc.

I've ranted about this before, but it fits the weekly rant so I'll do it again.

Someone deployed an autoscaling application into our production AWS account, but they set the maximum instance count to 300. The account limit was less than that. So, of course, their application gets stuck and starts scaling out infinitely. Two hundred new servers spun up in an hour before hitting the limit and then throwing errors all over the place. They send me a ticket and I login to AWS to investigate. Not only have they broken their own application, but they've also made it impossible to deploy anything else into prod. Every other autoscaling group is now unable to scale out at all. We had to submit an emergency limit increase request to AWS, spent thousands of dollars on those stupidly-large instances, and yelled at the dev team responsible. Two weeks later, THEY INCREASED THE MAX COUNT TO 500 AND IT HAPPENED AGAIN!

And the whole thing happened because a database filled up the hard drive, so it would spin up a new server, whose hard drive would be full already and thus spin up a new server, and so on into infinity.

Thats probably the only WTF moment that resulted in me actually saying "WTF?!" out loud to the person responsible, but I've had others. One dev team had their code logging to a location they couldn't access, so we got daily requests for two weeks to download and email log files to them. Another dev team refused to believe their server was crashing due to their bad code even after we showed them the logs that demonstrated their application had a massive memory leak. Another team arbitrarily decided that they were going to deploy their code at 4 AM on a Saturday and they wanted a member of my team to be available in case something went wrong. We aren't 24/7 support. We aren't even weekend support. Or any support, technically. Another team told us we had one day to do three weeks' worth of work to deploy their application because they had set a hard deadline and then didn't tell us about it until the day before. We gave them a flat "No" for that request.

I could probably keep going, but you get the gist of it.

Long rant ahead.. so feel free to refill your cup of coffee and have a seat 🙂

It's completely useless. At least in the school I went to, the teachers were worse than useless. It's a bit of an old story that I've told quite a few times already, but I had a dispute with said teachers at some point after which I wasn't able nor willing to fully do the classes anymore.

So, just to set the stage.. le me, die-hard Linux user, and reasonably initiated in networking and security already, to the point that I really only needed half an ear to follow along with the classes, while most of the time I was just working on my own servers to pass the time instead. I noticed that the Moodle website that the school was using to do a big chunk of the course material with, wasn't TLS-secured. So whenever the class begins and everyone logs in to the Moodle website..? Yeah.. it wouldn't be hard for anyone in that class to steal everyone else's credentials, including the teacher's (as they were using the same network).

So I brought it up a few times in the first year, teacher was like "yeah yeah we'll do it at some point". Shortly before summer break I took the security teacher aside after class and mentioned it another time - please please take the opportunity to do it during summer break.

Coming back in September.. nothing happened. Maybe I needed to bring in more evidence that this is a serious issue, so I asked the security teacher: can I make a proper PoC using my machines in my home network to steal the credentials of my own Moodle account and mail a screencast to you as a private disclosure? She said "yeah sure, that's fine".
Pro tip: make the people involved sign a written contract for this!!! It'll cover your ass when they decide to be dicks.. which spoiler alert, these teachers decided they wanted to be.

So I made the PoC, mailed it to them, yada yada yada... Soon after, next class, and I noticed that my VPN server was blocked. Now I used my personal VPN server at the time mostly to access a file server at home to securely fetch documents I needed in class, without having to carry an external hard drive with me all the time. However it was also used for gateway redirection (i.e. the main purpose of commercial VPN's, le new IP for "le onenumity"). I mean for example, if some douche in that class would've decided to ARP poison the network and steal credentials, my VPN connection would've prevented that.. it was a decent workaround. But now it's for some reason causing Moodle to throw some type of 403.

Asked the teacher for routers and switches I had a class from at the time.. why is my VPN server blocked? He replied with the statement that "yeah we blocked it because you can bypass the firewall with that and watch porn in class".
Alright, fair enough. I can indeed bypass the firewall with that. But watch porn.. in class? I mean I'm a bit of an exhibitionist too, but in a fucking class!? And why right after that PoC, while I've been using that VPN connection for over a year?

Not too long after that, I prematurely left that class out of sheer frustration (I remember browsing devRant with the intent to write about it while the teacher was watching 😂), and left while looking that teacher dead in the eyes.. and never have I been that cold to someone while calling them a fucking idiot.

Shortly after I've also received an email from them in which they stated that they wanted compensation for "the disruption of good service". They actually thought that I had hacked into their servers. Security teachers, ostensibly technical people, if I may add. Never seen anyone more incompetent than those 3 motherfuckers that plotted against me to save their own asses for making such a shitty infrastructure. Regarding that mail, I not so friendly replied to them that they could settle it in court if they wanted to.. but that I already knew who would win that case. Haven't heard of them since.

So yeah. That's why I regard those expensive shitty pieces of paper as such. The only thing they prove is that someone somewhere with some unknown degree of competence confirms that you know something. I think there's far too many unknowns in there.

Nowadays I'm putting my bets on a certification from the Linux Professional Institute - a renowned and well-regarded certification body in sysadmin. Last February at FOSDEM I did half of the LPIC-1 certification exam, next year I'll do the other half. With the amount of reputation the LPI has behind it, I believe that's a far better route to go with than some random school somewhere.

Paranoid Developers - It's a long one
Backstory: I was a freelance web developer when I managed to land a place on a cyber security program with who I consider to be the world leaders in the field (details deliberately withheld; who's paranoid now?). Other than the basic security practices of web dev, my experience with Cyber was limited to the OU introduction course, so I was wholly unprepared for the level of, occasionally hysterical, paranoia that my fellow cohort seemed to perpetually live in. The following is a collection of stories from several of these people, because if I only wrote about one they would accuse me of providing too much data allowing an attacker to aggregate and steal their identity. They do use devrant so if you're reading this, know that I love you and that something is wrong with you.

That time when...

He wrote a social media network with end-to-end encryption before it was cool.

He wrote custom 64kb encryption for his academic HDD.

He removed the 3 HDD from his desktop and stored them in a safe, whenever he left the house.

He set up a pfsense virtualbox with a firewall policy to block the port the student monitoring software used (effectively rendering it useless and definitely in breach of the IT policy).

He used only hashes of passwords as passwords (which isn't actually good).

He kept a drill on the desk ready to destroy his HDD at a moments notice.

He started developing a device to drill through his HDD when he pushed a button. May or may not have finished it.

He set up a new email account for each individual online service.

He hosted a website from his own home server so he didn't have to host the files elsewhere (which is just awful for home network security).

He unplugged the home router and began scanning his devices and manually searching through the process list when his music stopped playing on the laptop several times (turns out he had a wobbly spacebar and the shaking washing machine provided enough jittering for a button press).

He brought his own privacy screen to work (remember, this is a security place, with like background checks and all sorts).

He gave his C programming coursework (a simple messaging program) 2048 bit encryption, which was not required.

He wrote a custom encryption for his other C programming coursework as well as writing out the enigma encryption because there was no library, again not required.

He bought a burner phone to visit the capital city.

He bought a burner phone whenever he left his hometown come to think of it.

He bought a smartphone online, wiped it and installed new firmware (it was Chinese; I'm not saying anything about the Chinese, you're the one thinking it).

He bought a smartphone and installed Kali Linux NetHunter so he could test WiFi networks he connected to before using them on his personal device.

(You might be noticing it's all he's. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't).

He ate a sim card.

He brought a balaclava to pentesting training (it was pretty meme).

He printed out his source code as a manual read-only method.

He made a rule on his academic email to block incoming mail from the academic body (to be fair this is a good spam policy).

He withdraws money from a different cashpoint everytime to avoid patterns in his behaviour (the irony).

He reported someone for hacking the centre's network when they built their own website for practice using XAMMP.

I'm going to stop there. I could tell you so many more stories about these guys, some about them being paranoid and some about the stupid antics Cyber Security and Information Assurance students get up to. Well done for making it this far. Hope you enjoyed it.

Sometimes I wonder how compromised my parents online security would be without my intervention.

My mom logged into her gmail and there was an red bar on top informing about Google preventing an attempted login from an unknown device.

Like typical parents / old people, that red bar didn't caught her attention but I noticed it immediately. I took over and looked into it. It showed an IP address and a location that was quite odd.

I went ahead with the Account security review and I was shocked to find that she had set her work email address as the recovery email!!

I explained her that work email accounts cannot be trusted and IT department of the workplace can easily snoop emails and other info on that email address and should not be related to personal accounts.

After fixing that issue, me being a typical skeptic and curious guy, I decided to find more info about that IP address.

I looked up the IP address on a lookup website and it showed an ISP that was related to the corporate office of her workplace. I noticed the location Google reported also matched with the corporate office location of her work.

Prior to this event, few days ago, I had made her change her gmail account password to a more secure one. ( Her previous password was her name followed by birth date!! ). This must have sent a notification to the recovery mail address.

All these events are connected. It is very obvious that someone at corporate office goes through employees email addresses and maybe even abuse those information.

My initial skeptism of someone snooping throguh work email addresses was right.

You're welcome mom!

I just tried to sign up to Instagram. I made a big mistake.

First up with Facebook related stuff is data. Data, data and more data. Initially when you sign up (with a new account, not login with Facebook) you're asked your real name, email address and phone number. And finally the username you'd like to have on the service. I gave them a phone number that I actually own, that is in my iPhone, my daily driver right now (and yes I have 3 Androids which all run custom ROMs, hold your keyboards). The email address is a usual for me, instagram at my domain. I am a postmaster after all, and my mail server is a catch-all one. For a setup like that, this is perfectly reasonable. And here it's no different, devrant at my domain. On Facebook even, I use fb at my domain. I'm sure you're starting to see a pattern here. And on Facebook the username, real name and email domain are actually the same.

So I signed up, with - as far as I'm aware - perfectly valid data. I submitted the data and was told that someone at Instagram will review the data within 24 hours. That's already pretty dystopian to me. It is now how you block bots. It is not how Facebook does it either, at least since last time I checked. But whatever. You'd imagine that regardless of the result, they'd let you know. Cool, you're in, or sorry, you're rejected and here's why. Nope.

Fast-forward to today when I recalled that I wanted to sign up to Instagram to see my girlfriend's pictures. So I opened Chromium again that I already use only for the rancid Facebook shit.. and it was rejected. Apparently the mere act of signing up is a Terms of Service violation. I have read them. I do not know which section I have violated with the heinous act of signing up. But I do have a hunch.

Many times now have I been told by ignorant organizations that I would be "stealing" their intellectual property, or business assets or whatever, just because I sent them an email from their name on my domain. It is fucking retarded. That is MY domain, not yours. Learn how email works before you go educate a postmaster. Always funny to tell them how that works. But I think that in this case, that is what happened.

So I appealed it, using a random link to something on Instagram's help section from a third-party blog. You know it's good when the third-party random blog is better. But I found the form and filled it in. Same shit all over again for info, prefilling be damned I guess. Minor convenience though, whatever.

I get sent an email in German, because apparently browsing through a VPS in Germany acting as a VPN means you're German. Whatever... After translating it, I found that it asks me to upload a picture of myself, holding a paper in my hands, on which I would have a confirmation code, my username, and my email address.. all hand-written. It must not be too dark, it must be clear, it must be in JPEG.. look, I just wanted to fucking sign up.

I sent them an email back asking them to fix all of this. While I was writing it and this rant, I thought to myself that they can shove that piece of paper up their ass. In fact I would gladly do it for them.

Long story short, do not use Instagram. And one final thing I have gripes with every time. You are not being told all the data you'll have to present from the get-go. You're not being told the process. Initially I thought it'd just be email, phone, username, and real name. Once signed up (instantly, not within 24 hours!) I would start setting up my account and adding a profile picture. The right way to ask for a picture of me! And just do it at my own pace, as I please.

And for God's sake, tackle abuse when it actually happens. You'll find out who's a bot and who isn't by their usage patterns soon enough. Do not do any of this at sign-up. Or hell, use a CAPTCHA or whatever, I don't fucking care. There's so many millions of ways to skin this cat.

Facebook and especially Instagram. Both of them are fucking retarded.

Manager: You want a promotion? To senior? Ha. Well, build this web app from scratch, quickly, while still doing all your other duties, and maybe someone will notice and maybe they’ll think about giving you a promotion! It’ll give you great visibility within the company.

Your first project is adding SSO using this third party. It should take you a week.

Third party implementation details: extremely verbose, and assumes that you know how it works already and have most of it set up. 👌🏻

Alternative: missing half the details, and vastly different implementation from the above

Alternative: missing 80%; a patch for an unknown version of some other implementation, also vastly different.

FFS.
Okay, I roll my own auth, but need creds and a remote account added with the redirects and such, and ask security. “I’m building a new rails app and need to set up an SSO integration to allow employees to log in. I need <details> from <service>.” etc. easy request; what could go wrong?

Security: what’s a SSO integration do you need to log in maybe you don’t remember your email I can help you with that but what’s an integration what’s a client do you mean a merchant why do merchants need this

Security: oh are you talking about an integration I got confused because you said not SSO earlier let me do that for you I’ve never done it before hang on is this a web app

Security: okay I made the SSO app here you go let me share it hang on <sends …SSL certificate authority?>

Boss: so what’s taking so long? You should be about done now that you’ve had a day and a half to work on this.

Abajdgakshdg.

Fucking room temperature IQ “enterprise security admin.”
Fucking overworked.
Fucking overstressed.

I threw my work laptop across the room and stepped on it on my way out the door.
Fuck this shit.

The global joke of Information Security

So I broke my iPhone because the nuclear adhesive turned my display into a shopping bag.

This started the ride for my character arc in this boring dystopia novel:

Amazon is preventing me from accessing my account because they want my password, email AND mobile phone number in their TWO.STEP Verifivation.
Just because one too many scammers managed to woo one too many 90+y/o's into bailing their long lost WW2 comrades from a nigerian jail with Amazon gift cards and Amazon doesn't know what to do about anymore,

DHL is keeping my new phone in a "highly secure" vault 200m away from my place, waiting for a letter to register some device with a camera because you need to verify your identity with an app,

all the while my former car insurance is making regress claims of about 7k€ against me for a minor car accident (no-one hurt fortunately, but was my fault).

Every rep from each of the above had the same stupid bitchass scapegoat to create high-tech supra chargers to the account deletion request:

- Amazon: We need to verify your password, whether the email was yours and whether the phone number is yours.

They call it 2-step-verification.

Guess what Amazon requests to verify you before contacting customer support since you dont have access to your number? Your passwoooooord. While youre at it, click on that button we sent you will ya? ...

I call this design pattern the "dement Tupi-Guarani"

- DHL: We need an ID to verify your identity for the request for changing the delivery address you just made. Oh you wanted to give us ANOTHER address than the one written on your ID? Too bad bro, we can't help, GDPR

- Car Insurance: We are making regress claims against you, which might throw you back to mom's basement, oh and also we compensated the injured party for something else, it doesn't matter what it is but it's definitely something, so our claims against you just raised by 1.2k. Wait you want proof we compensated something to the injured at all? Nah mate we cant do that , GDPR. But trust me, those numbers are legit, my quant forecasted the cost of childrens' christmas wishes. You have 14 days or we'll see you in court haha

I am also their customer in a pension scheme. Something special to Germany, where you save some taxes but have to pay them back once you get the fund paid out. I have sent them a letter to terminate the contract.

Funniest thing is, the whole rant is my second take. Because when I hit the post button, devrant made me verify my e-mail. The text was gone afterwards. If someone from devRant reads this, you are free to quote this in the ticket description.

Fuck losing your virginity, or filing your first tax return, or by God get your first car, living through this sad Truman dystopia without going batshit insane is what becoming a true adult is.

I am grateful for all this though:

Amazon's safety measures prevented me from spending the money I can use to conclude the insurance odyssey, and DHLs "giving a fuck about customers" prevention policies made me support local businesses. And having ranted all this here does feel healthy too. So there's that.

Oh, cherry on top. I cant check my balance, because I can only verify my login requests to my banking account wiiiiiiith...?

So, I just recieved a welcome email from bit.ac, with my email and a random generated password. The fact is that, I have never registered on this website. Did someone just registered with my email? Or maybe it's a new marketing strategy, to collect emails from another databases and send them emails, "reminding" them their email and a random generated password, so that who recieve the email, to be confused and to access the website to see what is all about,resulting that the company gets more traffic & eventually new possible customers?

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DON'T LET MISPLACED FUNDS HOLD YOU BACK// START YOUR RECOVERY JOURNEY WITH TRUST GEEKS HACK EXPERT

In early October 2024, I found myself in an unfortunate situation that many cryptocurrency investors, especially newcomers, can relate to. I had been convinced by someone I connected with on Telegram to invest in an Altcoin cryptocurrency platform that promised high returns. At the time, everything seemed legitimate—the platform looked professional, the user interface was sleek, and the individual I spoke to appeared trustworthy. I made my investment, confident that this would be a great opportunity. However, as soon as I tried to withdraw my funds, I was faced with a shocking reality: I couldn’t access my account, and the platform seemed to be non-functional. After multiple attempts to contact support, I began to realize I had fallen victim to a scam. The platform was fake, and my funds were likely lost forever. It was a devastating feeling—especially knowing how much I had trusted the process. Fortunately, I didn’t give up hope. While researching how to deal with the situation, I came across a review that talked about funds recovery services. The review mentioned Trust Geeks Hack Expert, a company that specializes in helping people like me recover their lost cryptocurrency. Skeptical at first, I decided to contact them to see if they could help with my situation. From the first interaction, I felt more at ease. Trust Geeks Hack Expert team was professional, knowledgeable, and empathetic. They assured me that many people had fallen into similar traps and that recovery was possible with the right approach. Over the next few weeks, their team worked diligently to track down my funds, communicate with the platform’s support, and initiate the necessary recovery processes.To my amazement, Trust Geeks Hack Expert was able to successfully recover my money. The feeling of relief and satisfaction was indescribable. I had been ready to write off my investment as a loss, but thanks to their expertise and dedication, I got my funds back.I know that I’m not the only one who has fallen victim to a cryptocurrency scam. These fraudulent platforms are designed to look convincing, and it’s easy to be swept up in the hype. But I want to share my experience as a reminder: if you ever find yourself in a similar situation, help is available.If you need assistance recovering lost funds, I highly recommend reaching out to Trust Geeks Hack Expert. They have the expertise to help you navigate these types of scams and recover your money. Don’t hesitate to contact them if you find yourself in a situation like I did—you don’t have to go through it alone.Contact Trust Geeks Hack Expert. Email :trustgeekshackexpert {At} fast service {Dot} com & W h @ t's A p p  +1-7-1-9-4-9-2-2-6-9-3

BOTNET CRYPTO RECOVERY, SPECIALIZE IN RECOVERING LOST BITCOIN AND CRYPTOCURRENCY

The entire ordeal began rather innocently when I found myself drawn into the enticing world of online investing by an FX trader I encountered on Instagram. At first, this trader struck me as exceptionally professional and self-assured. They shared an array of impressive testimonials, recounting tales of astonishing returns that others had purportedly made from their investments. It was as if they had opened the vault of wealth and were inviting me in. The promises were bold and alluring: invest a relatively modest sum, and I could potentially multiply my investment fivefold in a mere seven days. It felt like a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and I couldn't shake the feeling that this was my chance to significantly grow my financial assets.

Initially, all of this seemed perfectly above board. The trader presented what appeared to be concrete proof of their successes, displaying glowing reviews and testimonials from previous clients who had seemingly struck it rich using their methods. Trust began to blossom, and I convinced myself that diving into this venture was not just a good idea but a savvy financial move. With a momentum of excitement and optimism, I made my first investment, gradually increasing my stake over the following weeks until I had funneled a total of $73,000 into this trader's enterprise.

However, as the days turned into weeks, a shadow began to loom over my optimism. Each time I attempted to withdraw my funds or the supposed profits I had amassed, I found myself met with a series of increasingly elaborate excuses. The trader's team concocted a new story each time I inquired about my cash — claims of additional fees, unforeseen taxes, or necessary "security deposits" that had to be paid before I could ever see my hard-earned money again. The first few times, I hesitated. I wanted to believe that these requests were genuine, that there were indeed legitimate hurdles to navigate. Yet, rather than easing my worries, these excuses only deepened my confusion and frustration.

With each additional demand, the trader's team positioned it as though compliance was my only option if I ever wanted to reclaim my money. It felt like a relentless cycle of hope and disappointment. I vividly remember the helplessness that enveloped me; every time I raised my concerns or expressed my doubts, they reassured me—a mix of confidence and false warmth—promising that my funds were just around the corner, pending these final hurdles.

Eventually, as reality settled over me like a cold blanket, I came to a heart-wrenching realization: I had fallen victim to a scam. The vexation and despair left me reeling, and although I felt utterly desperate, I was at a loss as to how to take action and recover my funds. Then, by sheer chance, I stumbled upon a social media post from someone who had gone through a harrowing experience similar to mine. They mentioned a company called BOTNET CRYPTO RECOVERY, a team of crypto recovery experts dedicated to assisting individuals in retrieving lost funds from fraudulent investment schemes.

My initial inclination was to be doubtful. After all, I had already experienced a deception that left me wary of placing my trust in another entity. Nevertheless, after much contemplation, I resolved to take a leap of faith and reached out to BOTNET CRYPTO RECOVERY. I provided them with a comprehensive account of my transaction history and the unfortunate details of my case, praying that they could provide a glimmer of hope amidst my frustration. To my astonishment, just seven hours later, they requested my wallet address, indicating they were ready to take action.

What transpired next was nothing short of miraculous: I found $73,000 reappearing in my wallet. The relief and gratitude I felt were beyond words. BOTNET CRYPTO RECOVERY proved to be nothing like the trader who had initially lured me into this mess. They were consistently professional, impressively prompt, and thoroughly diligent in their work. Their expertise and dedication truly facilitated the recovery of a significant portion of my lost funds.

In light of my experience, I cannot stress enough how crucial it is to look to recovery specialists like BOTNET CRYPTO RECOVERY if you ever find yourself ensnared in a similar predicament. Their intervention made a profound difference in my case, and I will forever be grateful for their support during such a tumultuous time. If you find yourself in such a challenging situation, I highly recommend seeking help from professionals who understand the complexities of these fraudulent schemes; they can make all the difference in the world. Email them on ( botnetcryptorecovery @ groupmail . c o m )

RECOVER YOUR STOLEN BTC/USDT WITH THE HELP OF SOLACE CYBER WORKSTATIONS

When I first encountered a fitness-focused crypto token supposedly endorsed by NFL quarterback Jake Thompson, I was filled with excitement and optimism. As a long-time fan of Thompson's remarkable performances on the field, his endorsement would lend credibility to the project. Eager to seize what I thought was a golden opportunity, I invested $12,000, convinced that this token would yield significant returns. My enthusiasm quickly turned to despair. Just days after my investment, Thompson deleted all his posts related to the token, leading to a catastrophic collapse in its value. To my utter disbelief, I later learned that the account promoting the token was a fraudulent impersonation of someone who had been posing as Thompson to mislead investors like me. This shocking revelation made it clear that the endorsement was nothing more than a ploy by a scam artist, raising serious ethical concerns about the integrity of celebrity endorsements in the cryptocurrency realm. Desperate to recover my losses, I sought assistance from Solace Cyber Workstations, a firm renowned for its expertise in tracing and recovering funds from fraudulent schemes. Solace Cyber Workstations conducted a thorough investigation and uncovered a disturbing connection between the token's development team for orchestrating celebrity scams. This agency had a long history of leveraging high-profile endorsements, including impersonations, to ensnare unsuspecting investors in dubious ventures. With the support of Solace Cyber Workstations, I felt a renewed sense of hope. They took decisive action, threatening to expose the agency's clients to compel them to take responsibility. Thanks to Solace Cyber Workstations' strategic approach, I was able to recover an impressive 90% of my investment, totaling $10,800. While I still faced a loss, it was a tremendous relief to see such a significant portion of my money returned, all thanks to Solace Cyber Workstations' diligent efforts. This has served as a harsh lesson about the inherent risks of investing in celebrity-endorsed cryptocurrencies, particularly when impersonation is involved. I now recognize the critical importance of conducting thorough research and exercising caution before committing my funds to any project, especially those backed by famous figures. I hope my story serves as a warning to others to remain vigilant in the ever-evolving landscape of digital assets, and I cannot stress enough how instrumental Solace Cyber Workstations was in helping me navigate this challenging situation. Don't be left out, reach out to them now
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