Fixing a parents iPhone, episode 1.

Problem: "Whatsapp is gone off my phone"

Debugging:

Me: *unlocks phone and sees whatsapp*, it's right here.

Mam: no, I no that I can't see my messages.

Me: ok, that is definitely not what "whatsapp is gone off my phone means".

*opens whatsapp*
*inside add contact screen*

App seems ok, your trying to add a contact?

Mam: that's a problem, whenever I open it I only see that page.

Me: *taps cancel button with shocked face*

Mam: omg there's my messages, how did you do that?

Me: ... ... ... I tapped the very easy to see, large cancel button in the top right hand corner.

Mam: but why was it opened there?

Me: *looks at opened message from unknown number*

If I was to hazard a guess, now stay with me on this one as it's a bit complex. I think ... I THINK ... you clicked the "add to contacts" button on the screen in front of you.

I am suspicious of one thing though.

Mam: what's that?

Me: how you managed to click the add contacts button, and when brought to the add contacts screen, you assume the app is broken.

Mam: oh will you **** off you sarcastic little ****. Thank you very much.

Me: no prob, 4 year computer science course put to great use.

My 6 year old has been learning about trees at school, and had questions for me. Needless to say, she now has the best understanding of data structures in her class, and I expect parents evening will be "interesting"

Parents with computer problems

I fucking love my parents.

Came to visit them again and told them that I might buy an iPhone in the future (I fucking hate apple/i-devices and they know that).

Mom: "You are going to WHAT? Are you okay, son?"
Dad: *walks towards me and puts hand on forehead* "Hmmm, doesn't seem to be that warm. Maybe we should visit a psychiatrist soon."

Me: 😂. mom, dad, I fucking love you.

Same goes for my parents... lol

Don't get into tech. Go into dancing or modeling.

Str8 from pcmasterrace

Where you're really into computers and shit but your parents forced you to become doctor.

My dad called me up at 11:30 PM telling me that his computer wasn't booting. I drive over to see what was going on. I notice immediately that the motherboard light is a solid amber light.

Me: "The motherboard is amber, that means it's failing to POST".

Dad: "How soon can we fix it? I need to run my Ebay business."

Me: "A week probably. You have a laptop that works can you use that?"

Dad: "It doesn't work great with Windows, it's not a very powerful compu"

Me: "You're going to use Linux dad. Welcome to Linux."

Translated:
"And jesus said:
Return home to your villages and solve the IT problems of your parents"
Merry Christmas everyone!!

When I Made Passworts visible in Chrome and the teacher sent me home...
...It was Friday!
Ps:
She sent me home because she was really fu**ing scared of what I did and even called my Parents

Parents: When your child spends a lot of time with the PC and doesn't want to interact with you, you have some reflection to do before you turn off the internet and nag them for things all day. Chances are, they don't like being with you but don't want to say it, either, because of the kind of things they know you will say and think if they do it.

And for the love of everything that is holy, do NOT turn the internet off! That pisses them off even more!

Maybe I'd have told you how much I hate being forced to be with you if it didn't mean I'd get guilt tripped about it.

Being around the people who pretend that you are a fucking machine that only needs material things in life and does not at all need emotional support at least in the early parts of your life and deflecting every legit argument for the things you stand for with "Muh Feelingz" makes them seem even more pathetic than they are. They manage to be an inspiration to everyone who doesn't know them, yet fail to be the persons their children have any respect for.

It's as if children never imitate their surroundings at all...

The guard at our school thinks I'm hacking

My parents thinks I'm hacking

My teacher thinks I'm hacking

But all I did was only build Redis from source...

Bruh

I spent a day teaching my 3 year old nephew to count from 0 and he argued with his teachers the following day that he has 9 fingers. His parents have been called to school 😂

Back in the days...

Parents: get off that computer it will get you nowhere in life!

Me:But im programming not playing games..I want to become a programmer...

Parents:programming or games it's all the same! Take an example of your sister who actually achieved something with her studies (she's a doctor)

Me today asa computer engineer...receiving paycheck higher than my sister who is a doctor and not to mention I got a car of the company and living very comfortably.

Parents can't believe it.

#rekt

Moral of the story: never let anyone tell you what to do. Keep doing what you truly love and get real good at it!😉

Linux is awesome. In runs on my fridge (Tizen), my TV (Tizen), my phone (Android), my watch (Android Wear), My PC (Ubuntu) and my laptop (Kali). I'm now trying to force my parents to convert to Linux.

Me: *opens a terminal in front of parents and starts a build script from command line. Logs start rapidly flooding the screen*

Mom: *whispers to dad proudly* “look at how much she has worked. Look how fast the lines are running on the screen!!

I didn’t wanna burst their bubble by explain them that their child is NOT doing any rocket science, and is something even they can do(maybe better).
So I responded back with a fake serious tone
“Yeah it’s all code.”
If only they knew what I was actually doing...

"Your parents definitely had merge conflicts creating you"

!rant

My parents gave me a lovely surprise😍

4gigs of gtx960m and a 6th gen i5, I think I am set for a few years

"Dad, just because the envelope has 'USA' printed on it doesn't mean that it's a job offer from Google" :/

Thanks @trogus & @dfox for the stickers.
- With love from India

Conversation with my mom the other day:

Mom - How do you use the screenshot button on the keyboard? (She has a Windows work laptop)

Me - Just press it.

Mom - I did that! It didn't do anything.

Me - Lol it's not supposed to do anything. It takes a picture of whatever is on your screen and you have to paste it somewhere like Paint to save the image.

Mom - Ohhh that's too much work. I use Snippit (or whatever the built in Windows screenshot app is called) and send it to myself in an email.
-------------------------
She takes a screenshot, pastes it in an email, and sends it to herself to save it. Hm.

Then she told me tonight that she needed to screenshot these questions in a quiz she was taking. I kid you not - she took a screenshot of 2 questions at a time, pasted them in an email that she sent to herself, and then printed the email. She did this for 40 questions so she printed out 20 emails with screenshots of quiz questions. She also printed out the 200 page manual she needs to study and deleted the pdf. Mom, seriously? What if you need to find something in that 200 page manual? It's so much easier to ctrl + F to find a specific word or phrase. Ohh it doesn't matter she says, there's an index.

I am Indian. I thought my parents had high standards then I looked at devrant's requirements for a stress ball.

My parents recently got divorced and sold their house, so I had to go through all my old stuff and found this beauty! A pair of new bateries and it still work! Fuck Yeah!

Who hates when their parents think they're playing video games when in reality we're programming?

What my parents think I do to fix the wifi vs. What I actually do

Dad calls:
D: Hai, so, um, my pc's not booting up.
Me: So?
D: What do I do now?
M: You tried fixin' it?
D: That's why I'm calling you.
M: I'm 400km away from you. Does it do anything by pressing a power-on button?
D: No. But I touched it, it's really hot.
M: When was the last time you cleaned that shit up?
D: I have to clean it?
*PC is located at dusty environment at work. 5 years old and is being turned on 6 days a week*

Clean. Your. Pc.
Oh, and yeah, it overheated, burned the mbo, power suply, and cpu cooler stopped spinning.
It's like Satan threw a curse on a pc, and took a piss on it.
The best part? He's mad because I "never help him nor have time when he needs something to be fixed".
He can fix the PC in a pc shop that is across the street.

So, you doin' any better this week?

Parents:why is my iPad so slow?

Me: It's old (1st gen that came out in 2010)

P:well just clean it up and make it go faster

M:Theres nothing to clean... Theres only a browser app and solitaire....

P: well just fix it so it's faster

M:....... *turns it off and on again*

M: All fixed

Developers sound like psychotic sewing serial killers.

Always taking about strings and threads or killing parents, children and detaching heads.

Parents who, despite clearly seeing a code on my monitor think that I'm playing games, and need to nag me to study cause they "rarely see me with the textbook".
I'm in an IT university and explaining that everything's in PDF or just online doesn't help

It was my birthday yesterday and my dad wrote this...

Always happens..😆😆😆

Me: *uses google chrome*
Parents: Stop, log out of everything, you're hogging up the internet, omg
Me: *unplugs computer*
Parents: *their computer still not working* You downloaded a virus to our wifi you're grounded for a month

First rant.

Managing an app in Canada, came back home to Thailand to visit my parents.

No deployments while you're gone, just bug fixes, boss said.

Landed at 3am, "hey I know we only support desktop but we got new customers only on iPad, make it responsive in a day and deploy." Wtf.

Haven't even seen my parents. In Starbucks.

They know exactly what I do, both my parents and my sister.

Then again, they use Linux as main system although they're very a-technical ;)

CSS is so unfair. Children will never be able to find out who their parents are!

As my teacher once said: if you want to avoid to get a burnout, just have kids. Parents have no time for having burnouts.

My parents both have cs degrees

So they don't think I am that special.

But my mom is also one of those people who ask me to help them with googleable questions.

My mom: "there's a virus in my phone! It says so when I open Chrome!"
Me: "...stop clicking on strange links that your friends send you, mom. Nobody will ever give you free Nespresso capsules for life as a gift."

Every damn time.

Big stormish weather in the Netherlands today. I rely on public transportation for work and the trains are down 😩
Glad my parents live nearby my work!

when ur parents try to understand what u do.

So my mom told me I should stop playing games...

....When she literally saw me flashing OpenWrt in a Linksys router...

chotto matte nani sore

Convincing my parents that I'm doing something useful on my computer and that it can also help me get a job

one of my cousin ask me to help him for uploading his ex's private pics and videos on porn websites.
Because her parents are not allowing their marriage and she is not ready to go against family (he is not working anywhere, Jobless)

I simply take screenshots of our chat and send to his ex and her parents.

Hope they will punish him.

Mum: "Well I suppose all that sitting in from of the computer has paid off"

Dad: "You want to be like that PayPal guy who now builds rockets?"

My parents are pretty cool

At my sisters place together with my parents. Showed my 100K accomplishment and I'm now showing my mother around.

It's funny how certain terms are hard to grasp for not so techy people!

Maybe your parents won't know, but I sure as hell will

When my brain is on turbo boost mode to complete my coding projects and my parents are like "son stop playing with your laptop, do some productive work, think of your future". 🙂🔫

Cleaning my dad's iphone.

This is what happens when you put an iPhone in an otterbox

Today's my birthday!

YAAYYYYYY

ME: Presents?
Parents: You didn't requested one.
ME: But you always bought me SOMETHING.....
Parents: What do you want?
ME: Dunno.........

(sobs)

parents every day: "how can you drink that much coffee and not die??"

>Degree i think im getting: software engineering
>Degree my parents think im getting: repair magic

What my parents would have said back in the day if I told them I was a dev: "You listen to that annoying sound for a living?"

my parents told me to build a website for my father's company ... one hour later they asked me if it was ready ..

Parents bought a new fridge then asked me to "set it up" because you're good with computers.

To cut a long story short... My parents said not to touch the computer :)

git commit -m "Batman! (this commit has no parents)"

I'll show myself out.

!dev

New year's resolutions:

1) Rid and keep my life free of toxic people. This includes parents.
2) Find a well-paying job that isn't also toxic.
3) Take care of myself for a change!
4) Stop putting up with things I don't have to.
5) Actually enjoy things I enjoy.
6) Finally buy a harp. I've wanted one since I was 3 ffs.
7) Finish de-googling my life.

DEVRANT CRASHED AND MY RANT IS GONE! I'M NOT A HAPPY MISH.

To be brief, I just remembered how my father used to smash my phone to the ground when he was angry about it.

Everytime he sees me using it. Smash!

I once made a Facebook to make more friends since I didn't have much, and still don't. (I didn't use the app btw.) He saw my search history and was furious. (My parents don't permit me to have social media. They think devRant is a school thing.)

He smashed it to the ground saying I can never use Facebook again.

He did that to 3 phones.

Fortunately, he doesn't do that anymore. Mainly because I'm the one who helps him with computer stuff and searches for the emails he needs.

eyesight-- . Parents blaming my laptop for this.

I'm a freelance iOS developer / UI designer and working on a pet related startup. I deal with lot of pets. My parents thinks that I'm full-time dog care taker.

Guess who's fixing their parents neighbours iPad tomorrow 😒

My mom was kind of addicted to one of those fake news buzzfeed kind of online communities. She used to send me these posts like every day.

Spent about two months deliberately destroying each and every "scientific article" she sent me. It was a pseudo-scientific trash fake news kind of page and pretty much every article was just made up or had same kind of communities as a reference. I just googled the shit out of each and every topic.

She's unsubscribed now.

Feels good. I noticed that most of people of previous generations really need to be taught how to use google. Some of these communities are full-blown propaganda machines spreading things like anti-vaxx or similar.

Found this sweet floppy at my parents place yesterday.
I dont even know if 1.44MB was alot, average or a little back then.

ALWAYS make a backup, or at least save your files every 5 minutes (or turn auto-save on).

You never know whether your parents will click the X button and clicking No in the save confirmation.

IT: The only place where killing parents and children is acceptable.

Dad: “Hey son.. I have this new software called blablablu.."

Me: "yeah?.."

Dad: "well it's not working.. there's an error and it's not doing what I want.."

Me: "okay.. I don't know.. sorry.. I don't know that software.. I can't help you.."

Dad: "you're studying computer science... you should know what to do.."

You ****ing serious?! -.-

My dad was a Novell Certified Engineer and my mom a Bachelor in Computer Systems, so I kinda admired them until one tragic day my dad suggested "Hey son why don't you make it using Access".

wow. my parents just accused open sourse as being Communist.

I have to live with this everyday...

How tf does these even make sense?! That's a fucking sledgehammer and large metal chisel on fucking steroids. If your parents don't know what the fuck those are and realize they have nothing to do with fixing a relatively flimsy box (in comparison) they probably need more than their WiFi fixed, but since they managed to fucking raise you, I doubt they're that dumb. I get that parents might not always understand technology, but shit, at least respect the fact that they survived without the Internet, which you probably couldn't do...

My parents are happy that I'm finally able to fund my caffeine addiction all by myself

Man: Hey Google, tell my wife that I cant make for the dinner with her parents.
Google Assistant: Okay, will do.

After sometime...

Google Assistant: Next time, you talk to your wife yourself...

Happened half a year ago (parents both use Linux although they're very a-techie).

*Dads laptop comes back from store after a repair*
Dad: (on the phone) hello son, could you help me out? they put some weird stuff on my laptop at the repair centre...
Me: Weird stuff? like what?
Dad: It's a virus I think
Me: A virus??
Dad: Definitely a virus!
Me: And what is this virus called?
Dad: Windows 10!
Me: Oh yes coming over asap to get that removed!

I put elementary OS on it again when i went to visit my parents.

Introducing my parents/sister to devRant. This is way more explaining then I thought but very funny 😅.

Especially explaining the word devRant, the principle of comments and rants and how mentions and tags work is a challenge 😆

*while visiting my parents once in while*

Mom : son, help! I have a problem with my [insert technological device here]!

Me : ugh... Here we go again. *Applies physical presence near mom and said problematic device*

Mom : oh, well... It's working now! Thanks!

Me : numberOfFixes++; // ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

!dev && rant

Went to the café earlier today to buy some cigarettes, because the nearby beauty/drug store is phasing them out due to what according to the cashier I asked is because "we are a beauty store so cigarettes don't align with that philosophy!"

If they really stand for beauty, they wouldn't have employed you, ugly fucking bitch.

So, onwards to the café which I recall has a cigarette vending machine. Closed.

To the next one!

Me: "Um, do you have a cigarette vending machine?"
Bartender: "Nope."

Some motherfucker who was drinking there: "You know, you could stop smoking and start living healthy-"

Me: "you know how difficult it is to stop smoking? ^^"

Me (internally): YOU FILTHY WASTE OF OXYGEN, THIS IS MY BODY, MY LIFE, I CHOOSE WHAT TO DO WITH IT!! Or are you divine oracle of knowledge about health somehow an authoritative source of advice?!

You know what that sounds like? It sounds like those fucking morons on every Windows rant saying "yOU sHoULd rEalY usE LenOx!!". Or the motherfuckers at every family dinner saying "I am vegan, therefore you shouldn't eat meat!!"

Same motherfucker: "Oh it looks like you're sweating too!"

YEAH YOU PIECE OF SHIT, I REALLY DIDN'T NOTICE THAT YET!!! IT'S 32 FUCKING DEGREES IN MY APARTMENT, MY ASSCRACK IS WELDED TOGETHER, YET YOU THINK THAT I DIDN'T NOTICE YET THAT I'M SWEATING?!!!

If only I could shoot them in their fucking heads and expose them for the brainless pieces of shit they are!!!

Article title: "Mastering React component composition using children"

<image of a couple holding a baby>

Image caption: "Parents with child."

**Reads the title again**

Wait what?

My parents joining the Linux PC Master race!!!

My parents think laptop is only for playing games.
I don't even have a game installed in my laptop.
They start telling me "stop playing, do something else" whenever I sit in front of laptop for more than 30 minutes.
:`(

I just had to explain my dad that he can scroll down on a website. fml.

My parents told everyone at church that I have a computer science degree. I got asked to install security cameras 5 minutes after. Cool :/

What I hoped to do today: program
What my parents hoped to do today: go to the pool
What we are actually going to do today: go to the pool

ABSOLUTELY AWSOME

ME: I'm having problems with my parents
GF: Why don't you talk to them?
ME: I can't
GF: Why not?
ME: They're made of code
GF: ... thinking... ~face palm~

Sometimes I wonder how compromised my parents online security would be without my intervention.

My mom logged into her gmail and there was an red bar on top informing about Google preventing an attempted login from an unknown device.

Like typical parents / old people, that red bar didn't caught her attention but I noticed it immediately. I took over and looked into it. It showed an IP address and a location that was quite odd.

I went ahead with the Account security review and I was shocked to find that she had set her work email address as the recovery email!!

I explained her that work email accounts cannot be trusted and IT department of the workplace can easily snoop emails and other info on that email address and should not be related to personal accounts.

After fixing that issue, me being a typical skeptic and curious guy, I decided to find more info about that IP address.

I looked up the IP address on a lookup website and it showed an ISP that was related to the corporate office of her workplace. I noticed the location Google reported also matched with the corporate office location of her work.

Prior to this event, few days ago, I had made her change her gmail account password to a more secure one. ( Her previous password was her name followed by birth date!! ). This must have sent a notification to the recovery mail address.

All these events are connected. It is very obvious that someone at corporate office goes through employees email addresses and maybe even abuse those information.

My initial skeptism of someone snooping throguh work email addresses was right.

You're welcome mom!

Moving to a new job, a new city and leaving my parents' house next month. Can't wait!

The toughest thing is to explain your parents that you are doing something productive when you are sitting in front of your computer for whole day.

At my parents house for the holidays and I don't have my original "duck" so I had to get a new one. Handmade out of rubber and metal and looks damn awesome

Girlfriend's parents are talking about an issue with their printer in the next room. How long before I'm asked to fix it?

Me: *talking to my rubber duck*

Parents: "Who're you talking to?"

Me: "I'm calling my team"

Parents: *walks in*
Parents: "what the FUCK"

Christmas at my parents. Yaaaaay They turn wifi off at night. Booooo

First day in a job in tech. Wish me luck.

Yes, I love my parents.

But every fucking time I plan to buy a PC they will make some noise. I am not even touching their money to buy it yet they will make a fuss about it.

"All my son does is sit in front of computer whole day"

Sorry father but I am doing the same thing in my job. They are young enough to know what I am doing yet still keeps ranting on me.

I still love them but this is so annoying sometimes.

1. Buy a new car for my parents
2. Get a coder girlfriend
3. Marry her

I was blowing dusts from my PC opening it's casing. My parents came near to me and said "Will this gonna wipe all the viruses from this PC ?"

Typical conversation between my parents and me

Parents: Can you make stuff?

Me: Make what?

Parents: The thing you do all the time.

Me: "Computer stuff"?

Parents. Yah...

Me: Well, yes, why?

Parents: What can you do?

Me: Well, I know C# the most...

Parents: Can you then make software like Facebook, Twitter, etc?

Me: Well, I can, but that will take a lot of time.

Parents: You should really make something and make money.

Me: Ok. (goes into my room, and turns on laptop)

(a few monents later....)

--[[CHORUS START]]--

Parents: U DOIN COMPUTER???

Me: Uh-huh.

Parents: When did I said to do "Computer stuff"?

Me: Well, you said to rest.

Parents: But I never said to do your "Computer stuff"!

Me: But you said to rest. For an hour!

Parents: WHY U SHOUT AT ME!!!! TURN OFF THAT **** NOW!

Me: Ok.... (turns off and opens C# book immediately)

Parents: What's that?

Me: C# book

Parents: What's C#?

Me: Programming language.

Parents: Where can you use it?

Me: Make stuff.

Parents: Like what?

Me: (lists my personal projects)

Parents: Show me.

Me: (turns on the computer and shows one of it)

Parents: Good. (leaves)

--[[CHORUS END]]--

Me: (deep breath) Can I FINALLY use the computer?

--[[CHOURS]]--

My parents turn off their router every night calling it "turning off the internet".

i hate it when my parents introduce me to their friends and say my job is an IT.

One year for Christmas, my dad got me an old tower and installed Windows 98 on it. He also got two old-school PCI WiFi cards so that my "new" computer could access the Internet via his.

I started learning basic web development. I would convince my mom (an English teacher) to buy me books on programming all the time when she was getting her own books at the store.

Eventually, I got a book on Blitz Basic and started making my own video games.

Then GameMaker, Java, C/C++, and more web development and design happened until all the sudden, out of nowhere, I'm a computer scientist 😁

It's crazy how much we owe to our parents. And neither us nor them even realized what they were doing at the time!

So I came back to my hometown for Chinese New Year (or Lunar New Year), the first thing I was asked by my parents was "Can you fix the landline?" 🙃🙃🙃

My mom's laptop is always on 80-90% CPU even in idle and it is obviously hella slow and I am the one who has to work with it usually (since my mom is too afraid to use any kind of technology and can't remember any of her passwords), I tried to solve it but I came to the conclusion that the problem is probably Windows 10 itself. Okay, the hardware is bad too but still.

I started thinking about installing Linux on it, but It's not my laptop and I do not want to mess it up and I never did it before.

TL;TR

My mum just came to me asking me why the mouse is not working ...like I'm GOD of electronics :( (I'm just a simple dev) I simply though that the battery is dead because it's old. Soooooo.....
I showed her how to open it and how to change the battery. After 5 min she came back with a new battery and the same mouse asking me to fix it for her....

In my mind I literally snapped my brain was bleeding and exploding at the same time.

I just cringed a fake smile and changed the battery in front of her very slowly. I sure she won't remember how to do it next time.

At the end of the story I can't talk back or be angry to my parents I have to much respect for them. They though me everything from how to poop, speak, dress, eat and so on.

Be kind to your parents.

//I don't mean this to brag, or upset anyone for that matter- just there are a lot of sad posts.
I only mean this to appreciate them.

Growing up, my parents supported anything I wanted to be.
They paid for my first computer(s), and always made sure I had the resources to learn anything I wanted to.
They understood when I dropped out of high school.
They ask about all my projects, and they're supportive of all of it, usually fascinated.
Even the parts they don't fully understand- they really do try to, and it makes it so much easier to work knowing that they're impressed with me.

This Friday is my first real interview where I hope to start as a junior, at my dream job. They've never been prouder.

I can never thank them enough

Trying to explain your parents what you actually do

Me: explaining the FOSS project I'm trying to get started, to my parents.

My dad: So how do you get paid?

Me: what? No....

Parents call me dumb but this is what happens when they don't understand probabilities and contrarianism....

There are 3, express trains (let's call A, B, C) in the morning 5 minutes apart.

After which the next one in 20 mins...

My parents can't be bothered to get up 10 minutes earlier and aim for A.

Today C got cancelled.

And here's the result... ORZ

And I'm late to work... With more stress than need....

So yea... I don't think I'm dumb, quite frankly I think I'm smarter than them and a lot of ppl...

My father while I was tinkering in the workshop :
"You see, I think you chose the wrong studies, you would have liked something else like material science a lot more."
At this moment my face took a question mark shape.
"Wait.. What? I mean... You know, I quit mechanical engineering to computer science, I actually made this decision because I thought it was better for me."
Him :
"But you will never have a good job in it. Material science for example is the booming industry, it's the future."
"What the... No, just no. Every year at my university several mechanical engineering students get thrown out because they can't even find an internship. Whereas most CS students find more than one and end up sharing job offers with their friends. And talk about an interesting job, in the mechanical domain everything already exists and it's just a matter of applying the same boring standards over and over again, when it's not just pure technician managing. In CS new technologies and tools appear regularly, keeping it interesting because evolution is hardly limited by real life physics, just by one's brain."

Pissed me off.

If your parents fucked you up, but now want to watch some netflix.

What my parents suggested I should read

When your parents expect you to be tech support and then fucking can't fix it, they get all like "You suck at programming". What does that have to do with fucking anything?!?!?!

!rant && extra('worried');

My 11 years-old brother seems to be addicted to Minecraft, not the "dis iz so kool" addiction, but the "I put my health and education in danger to keep playing this game (homeworks badly done, grades free falling, showers without soap in 30s flat, food eaten in 15s, starts to yell at parents when they want him to stop playing (parents bitch slapped him a few times for this, but he seems to persist)).

My parents are over 55 now, so they don't really know how to handle this (can't / don't want to blame them), and I'm supposed shove some reason in his dead brain next weekend (I live 150km away).
I've been addicted myself to videogames in general and WoW in particular ((almost) no regrets) a few years back.. what should I say to him else than "This shit will ruin your life even before you started it" (which is planned anyway) ?

Almost miss seeing these on my parents screens.

TFW you see someone hit "Apply" and then "Ok"... 😒

I wished my parents had something like this for me in childhood xD

Today, i moved out from my parents house, perhaps the most adult thing I've done so far.

Don't give your phone to parents....

Autocorrect may screw you 😂😂

Got a coffee grinder from my grand parents. Pretty old school, but I like it!! 😍
Just brew a big cup of coffee. It just tast delecious. ❤

Mum: can you look at my phone?
*bunch of random shit pops up all over the place*
Me: your phones got a bunch of viruses on it or something. You'll have to get it fixed
Her: can't you do it? You make apps. Can't you just make an app for me to fix my phone?
Me: I don't really make apps, besides that's kind of impossible.
Her: so what did you go to university for?
Me: -___-

when my parents come in I am be like!

So my parents got speakers integrated into their monitor. A few years ago (like 3-4) they made me turn off the sound because it annoyed them since all they did were playing some shitty flash games and some office work. Now they needed the sound back on and this is how it happened.

1. Confirm they plugged the right cable in. I know them so I knew that could be a problem

2. Made them download Teamviewer because I know they can't even doubleclick without guidance

Now the juicy part was to tell them they need to turn on sound on the monitor. As I was watching via teamviewer I saw them trying to click on the menu items from said monitor. Took me 5 minutes to explain that their mouse can't do shit on that because they need to navigate with the buttons underneath the monitor.

Turned out they couldnt get things right and I had no idea what they were seeing because they explanations went like "All I can see is Main Menu and Exit." - "Is that really all dad?" "Yes thats all. Main Menu, Brightness and Exit" turnes out the middle part is interchangable like "Brightness, Saturation, etc..."

After 2 hours I gave up and told them to pick up my speakers tomorrow

It seems as if my parents delete SYSTEM32 folder each time I visit them 😂.

How do you keep your parents from breaking their phone of pc?

Go to business school to get a Finance degree... Since you already know how to code, why do you need study CS? Finance is hot now, make $$$$$$

"Aunt": I know that you have a bachelor's degree in computer science so you are smart with the computer...can you help me to pair new universal remote control for my television?

So many years of programming and it's still complicated to explain to my parents why lecturers at university won't spend time to help me debug my code on big projects
And that doesn't mean that I'm -not learning to code- if I don't receive help on finding bugs

My parents always feel proud about my job and money I got but they always ask one question every time I meet them..

What do I actually do?

I believe Google knows me better than my parents because it has collected more data about me.

My mom asked me to speed up her PC's startup process. I looked into it and and probably found the problem: G Data.

I told her she has to delete it, there is windows defender anyways (and virus scanners are just snake oil). She refused and said: But I bought it from the local IT shop. They said it is the best.

I said: Yeah because they cannot sell windows defender...

She still argued that she paid for it and wants to keep it.

That was were I said: then enjoy your slow startups.

She also said she feels more secure with it. 🙄

I would not even be able to work with that PC! Its not old at all, but the permanent scanning comes at a high cost and probably does not help much.

But she trusts that local it store guy more than me apparently.

When you work from home and your same age cousins do nothing to earn, their parents: "It doesn't matter. He (me) works from home, meaning he does nothing too".

Seriously?

Before I finally managed to move out of my parents' place, they nonstop kept annoying me by saying I should get a "real job". They thought I was only playing games or browse random unimportant stuff on the computer...

Nowadays they think I "kreate" websites (as Karlie Kloss would pronounce it).
My mother one time was so fucking annoying about my job, I got so pissed off, I threw in her face her that I earn three times what she gets and I have much more responsibility and brain requiring work and that her single-cell brain would never understand what I am doing the whole fucking day.

Since then we dont talk much about work anymore.

Fucking parents... the best thing that happened to me was moving out of their shitty place and their poisonous attitude.

I really hope my parents don't check my search history

My father calls me very worried: hey, do you know your mother's email login username and password? We need it
Me: no? Why would I?
My father: well, she sent it to you on email when she created it, so you'd remember!

?? What?

The urge to leave my parents house :D

Fucking worked, been gone for 3 years now.

My parents are more distracted by cell phones than me? ....

Your identity is the most valuable thing you have.

Losing it for whatever reason, for example to be like your partner or your parents want you to be is probably the most wrong thing to do.

When you run into your ex/visit your parents that thought you were wasting your life.

The most important skill you can have is doing things without shame.

Shamelessly stay in your bed all weekends watching PewDiePie, never brushing your teeth, eating Doritos from under your pillow and peeing into empty Mountain Dew bottle if you feel like doing it.

Shamelessly spend your vacation sitting in the toilet with a laptop browsing reddit.

Shamelessly cut your product in half and ship it if you don't feel like perfecting it.

Shamelessly admit that you don't know something when you messed something up at work.

If you are a millennial like me, chances are your gen x parents told you that you have to be perfect / really good to succeed and to be worthy.

You know what? Fuck your parents then. Fuck my parents as well. Admitting this behavior wrong and actually giving up on living like something is always watching is the best thing you can do to your mental health.

I'm lazy. I write "any" here and there when they force me to do typescript at work. When I need a sidebar, I go and copy-paste that jquery snippet. I write like one article a month at best and I really want to say "fuck it" if I just don't feel like it.

You can always give up on everything and it's perfectly fine. This doesn't make you any kind of looser or something. You're perfectly fine.

Too bad I'm only beginning to master that.

If your parents are Software Engineers, and you still want to be a Software Engineer. Chances are you are adopted.

Back when I was in high school I created something like a simple version of MS Paint using Turbo C where the only graphics library function I used was putPixel().

I was so excited and showed it to my mom and what she said was : "Don't you have MS Paint for this, why do you bother creating a new one? Do something productive with your life."

Bae: Come over
Djikstra: But there are so many routes to take and I don't know which ones the fastest
Bae: My parents aren't home

Blogger, Introduced his girlfriend to his family

Parents: Who is she ?

Guy : 8 things you should know about this lucky girl!!😂😂😂

C# is the prime example that rude parents can have great babies

Telling my mom how to do computer stuff is like programming, I need to outline every fucking step. Yes this includes file management.

My parents know I systematically google every question they ask me about computer in general. Hopefully one day they'll do it too.

!dev, very !rant

Going to Romania tomorrow and the next day will finally meet my girlfriend's parents (she's from there). More nervous than I expected to be about a (hopefully) simple thing.

Yes this is a rant about parents and work but I don't care!

So looks like my parents are going to kick me out because I don't have a full time job and according to them, I'm not looking...

I currently work in retail and have for the past 5 years and started working day 1 that I could have, been applying for IT positions when I'm one of the highest qualified on my area but get turned down so they can pay a teenager half the amount, apply for big retail chains that are "always hiring" like Coles, woolies and Kmart, get turned fucking down.

Don't qualify for government assistance as I'm just out of the earnings bracket, can't afford my own places, don't have my licence yet so I'm fucked...

But hey, atleast my parents will be rid of me and just dis-own me like my middle brother until I have a kid or they need tech support.

Why is getting work so fucking hard when you're qualified, I'm willing to even be a call centre guy but as soon as job possibilities come up I get fucked over time and time again -,-

mom : i don't understand why my son became a nocturnal being..

father : son .. what the hell do you do entire night alone in your room with your lappy .. go get a gf or get married .. go get a life

relatives : beta (son in indian lang) my tv is not working can you fix it.. beta my internet is not working on my mobile (goddamnit turn on the mobile data for fuck sake )

When your parents use technology:

"I accidentally clicked it."

What is starting out progaming without explaining to your parents why you making an object move when you press a key, is not only impressive but also took you 15 hours to learn?

The best part about creating a girlfriend robot:
You can program it to send you its nudes whenever you want!!! She won't say that her parents are around! 😈

The downside:
You won't necessarily enjoy those nudes! 😅

My biggest distraction at coding are my parents.

I still live in there house and it's really comfy.

But whenever I code the always come into my room with something random like "my phone is not working" or "how can I delete this?"

I love my parents and Im glad that I can help but always get off where I was after 😂

My parents proudly accept me not working in computer related jobs. But they also would when I did. I think.... or I hope...

I just hope you guys and girls enjoy the time your parents are alive and have nothing to regret in the future. Life is to short for hatred.

my parents have a very old printer (it is so old even Noah could use it on his fcking ark). That piece of crap refused to print, I told my parents that they should buy a new one. My father told me that i should fix it since im studying programming for 3 years now.... I can't explain the feeling

I would say that I have good parents and my dad also supports what I do (most of the time) but could my mother please calm down and let me do what I enjoy doing while not yelling at me to learn Latin saying that it is 'the most important subject'.

Parents of the GitLab sysadmin right now.

My setup while on vacations at parents' home:

I just hope no parents will see this week's rants in their lifetime.

my parents just know I work with computers. they are happy that I have a job that pays well, and i'm happy.

do i need anymore then that?

My family thinks I can fix any broken printer, crack software, detect viruses and repair the apps on their phones.

At the moment, I'm an automation engineer and no matter how many times I explain what that is to them, they keep bugging me to build an online store kinda website with tons of functionality and within a few months. Oh, and make it be in the first results on Google search. I mean ffs, that's frustrating af!

For the first two years of college or so, my dad would often ask when I was going to start taking apart computers in classes.

"Dad, we don't do that."
....
"No, I'm learning about the software aspect."
...
"Never."

Going to register a domain name and it's already taken by a bloody estate agent. Why did my parents give me such a common name??

U guys know anyone who would ask "Can I turn off this power switch?" AFTER they already turned it off? My mother did that. On a PC that was in the middle of a large file upload over a ridiculously slow internet...

When I became a dev my parents said: "it's not rocket science, or chemistry or anything good, but at least it's not stressful, or dangerous and we can get free tech support. I hope you are able to pay your own bills and find rent"

A few years, a degree and finding a supportive woman who is now my wife and and I make 4 time as much as my parents make now they want me to move back so they can get their tech support and see my wife I guess she is more social than I am

!rant

We were talking about Kafka's "metamorphosis" and a friend said "what if the parents were programmers and did not want to have a bug in the family?"

Resolved issues with iCloud and my moms massive photo library...

Months later. "What's Apple Music?"

It's just a streaming service mom.

"I've been paying $10 a month for it, why am I paying for it?"

"Do you like to listen to music a lot? Do you want it?"

"No I don't even know what it is, you must've done this with that apple cloud thing"

"Mom those are different things, I helped you with your cloud storage it's not the same"

"Cancel it for me!!😡"

All I did was clear my moms iCloud storage enough that she could do some photo backups from her phone, months ago. Never even moved her into the paid tier for the cloud storage, let alone an Apple Music subscription that she had for months and didn't want or use. Don't worry, I cancelled it for her.

My parents think everything i do on the computer is magic. Theyre too scared to toich any of my stuff because I convinced them it records live video and biometrics to my phone.

Sometimes life is good

Took dad's phone in hand to find out a contact number and realised that his phone has become quite slow to respond.
Asked him why is that and he didn't answer my question and said that he has got a message that Airtel is giving away free 4G Sims.
Bewildered, I asked him so what is that supposed to do with his phone being slow and he said, "If we take the 4G sim, then won't that make my phone faster? I have heard that 4G is fastest network".
And my reaction was like

My dad just thought I'd grow out of my "gaming and PC 24/7" phase and didn't really care about the Tech. But when I started studying to be a dev he gave full support. "Do anything you like except ride motorbikes, do drugs or be a sailor, so long as you can sustain yourself" was the message carried across generally.

whenever i tell my dad about a technology that is going way beyond our imagination and tell him about the consequences of it and how we should worry about that
then he watches some random tv show about internet security/cyber security and various algorithms (very abstract) which are currently changing the world and how we should care about our data and what the consequences of X technology is...
he be like: "oh is that true? that's interesting, how does that work?"
i'm like😑 dad, i already told you about that😩

ever had similar experience?

Have parents? Save yourself time with this general-purpose email signature.

When there's something about TOR on TV and you say that you know and use it.

Now my parents think that I do illegal stuff.
Thanks TV...

I'm a developer, but also a father of 2 kids. I love spending time with them, but sometimes I also like to work on my side projects. And besides that, after a long day of work, even if I have spare time, I also like to lay down on the couch and watch Netflix.

How do you other full time developer / parents out there cope with your own personal projects?

Both my parents are engineers of sorts, so they are surprisingly understanding of my work. 😁

Twitter, Instagram, Quora, devRant (for good) and parents 😂
And sometimes lack of self motivation

Parents: Why don't you go work at one of those big companies instead of no-name startups or small businesses?
Me: Well, I work where there are suitable positions for me and the project is interesting and/or challenging.
Parents: Why?

It's so fuckin hard to find a username if your name is very common.
It irritates me everytime.

My parents think that I type on my laptop what I have been taught at university and that makes me a programmer. Lol.

When you juggling between a technical conversation, a private conversation and one with your parents at the same time.

I don't know what to feel anymore

Came to my parents house for the vacation period and forgot to push the code i was working on my computer. Now i sit with my laptop crying.

This was a much needed vacation.

Was working non stop for last 6 moth. Went to my native place, enjoyed time with my parents and frienss.

"could you fix my computer this weekend?"
hmpf...
"kay"
"i already found an infected File and removed it"
"WHAT?"
"yes, Windows tried to prevent me from deleting but I opened console and removed it"
"where was it?"
"somewhere it a folder called System or so"

HOLY FUCK WHY CANT YOU JUST LEAVE IT AS IS IF YOU DONT KNOW WHAT YOU EXACTLY DO????

My mom: "My iPad is broken because I deleted by Goggle account"

Me: "Are you actually using Android tablet? How the hell that you deleted your Google account affects your iPad?"

My mom: "No, I definitely using iPad, and now I can't Goggle. And I don't remember my Goggle account. Can you come and help me to fix it?"

Me: "There is no way to fix it, if you don't remember anything about your "Goggle" account. But I will come and see what happen to your iPad later."

Sometimes when I'm sitting in the train, I feel like I'm in a kindergarten...
For real there are so many children here wtf.
Annoying babies screaming, parents playing fucking annoying children songs for their babies on like full volume (Hello WTF!?!) and children that run around in the train.

I fucking hate it...
But the train is completely full so I can't go to any other seat.

Stupid parents...

Can I have sum songs to drown out my parents shouting please?

They're here!
Apparently they got here a like month ago... my parents forgot to tell me🤦‍♀️
I'd been at school when they arrived so I couldn't be here when they arrived.
Now to find a good place to put them😁

Today is “Visit your parents and secretly install Chrome as the default browser” day.

Make sure you’ve visited your parents and switched their IE to Chrome.

I can't be the only one with a parent so inept with technology...

My father was an architect. He doesn't do well with any tech device, computer or mobile - all my attempts to teach / explain to him how to do one thing or another (concept of an account in app store, for starters, or how to find the app store icon on his iPhone) are viciously blocked out, and his defense -
"Listen, you know I don't understand, these things, I'm not a pro. If you'd asked me about how to mix I'd answer because there I'm a pro"

We live in different countries, btw, so have to teach him by phone.

After each unsuccessful attempt from my side he proceeds to ridicule me saying "Well and I thought you were a pro at these things"

Sigh.

*sometime during my sophomore year in university. I was a Biology major and just switched to Computer Science. I'm currently a senior graduating in the Spring.*

Me: "Mom and Dad I changed my major to Computer Science!"

Parents: "How will you be able to make a living playing games?"

Me: "I won't be playing games, I'll be coding/programming things and building software."

Parents: "I thought you wanted to become a doctor?"

Me: "Well I decided I wanted to choose a career that I like and I also didn't want to stay in school for 8 years. Also, the salary I can make as a developer/engineer is close to that of some doctors."

Parents: "Well we wanted you to go to be a physical therapist. We feel that it's the best option for you."

Me: "I think this is my best option because there aren't even enough people available to fill the jobs that will be around when I graduate. Which also means that I can make a higher salary."

Parents: "Well I guess we'll see if you can make a living and provide for a family just playing/making games."

Me: "That's fine I never needed your support anyways."

*My parents thought that if the job wasn't physical labor then it wasn't a "real job". (Idk how they decided that a Physical Therapist was a "real job") I moved out less than a year after this argument because I was constantly put down by my parents for coding/programming as well as playing video games in my spare time. They thought it was childish. This has shown me what I won't do when I become a parent.*

*Just a side note: I have paid for everything I own that wasn't gifted to me since I was 18 and had a job while attending college. I also got a scholarship to go to college, so my parents didn't have to pay for any of it.*