The ultimate "I am vegan" guy will be arch linux user, vegan, trans, crossfitter and cryptocurrency investor. I've just met guy like this in my job. He did not shut up for a while. I am not sure whats he doing and whats his job but my guess is that hes paid for spreading cancer, sucidal toughts and eatig your will to live and talk with people...

R - retard
M - me

R: Hey CopyPasteCode I found this bug, it does 'this' insted of 'this'. *spreads arms to see his "muscles"*
M: *headphones off* Ok, I will look into it... *headphones back on*
R: Btw you invested something in the crypto, didnt you? Ive invested... ...bitcoin... ...crypto... ...litecoin..., do you think that... ...something... ...bla bla bla?
M: *tries not to kill myself after his 5 minutes of monolog* Ye sure
R: By the way Ive found this awesome vegan restaurant that accepts litecoin, would you like to come sometime?
M: *10 minutes monolog about vegan food and shit. At this point I want to die* Ok, I will now work on that back, see you later.
R: ye sure bro (wtf, "bro"?)... *looks like hes walking away* *teleports on my otger side touching my monitor*
WOW you are also a Limux user? 😮 Ivr installed arch linux this weekand and its so awesome, *another 6 minutes of monolog*
M: *smiling and preparing to kill him or myself* Nice, awesome *fake smile*
R: Anyway, I gotta go (FINALLY!!!), btw, I am going to the *name of local trans and gay club*, wanna go with me?
M: *after a month after a breakup with my GF (because she was cheating on me) which everyone in the office knew...)* Not really *trying to thing how to say "fuck off" without having meeting with HR*, I cant, I already have somethimg.
R: Oh, ok. Btw, you are rly cool bro (again), we should hang. We should hangout more often...

I hope someone is paying me for loosing 27 minutes with this guy.

GF: How was your pitch to investors?
Me: it was great (... went-ahead to talk about the daunting process of the preparation and motivation).
GF: Why do you go through all this process, when you can become a fraudster, you can use voodoo and make it even easier, in less than 3 months you can buy a duplex, nice car and we can go shopping... you don't need to do any human ritual unlike before - I heard you can even meet a chief priest to make it faster for you.
just get the bag abeg (slang for getting rich quick).

Me: Fuck the day I met you, not everyone wants to be a low-life, and fuck out from my life.

Men if you live in a saner society, or you are born to elite/upper-middle-class you don't how lucky you are.
Most times I wonder how I keep my sanity with all these shitty people around. like messed up society where almost everyone is a fucking deep hypocrite
.I know I need to change my circle but how the fuck do I do that when I am surrounded by fuckstards, which are far worst than Gypsies.
lowlifes with low dreams.
I need to get the fuck out of this place!

==stolen
Gf: Your mom wanted to talk to you. I think you should call her
Me: mom();