You're all fucking idiots with no thoughts of your own. No one gave a shit when Drupal and Django made the master/slave change 4 years ago because the idea of the "regressive left" wasn't the cultural enemy of the zeitgeist.

Think for your fucking selves instead of being so brain-dead and reactionary to something that doesn't even affect you.

Fucking neo-reactionary bullshit, that's what it is. You people don't care, you just want an excuse to rant at "teh SJWs".

Fuck.

!rant

For the first time, I solved a pretty serious optimisation problem in our codebase without any external input. It's a little thing, but small victories like this are part of what makes the job so much fun for me.

Currently rewarding myself with coffee and chocolate. I feel good!

I am so fucking sick of people being such shits to people who don't know things. Ignorance is not a sin.

Ok, I'm not saying there's a causal relationship here... I'm just going to say that the morning the VSCode Python extension is publicly moved in to the Microsoft product line, it starts devouring my resources by spawning a million instances of python.exe on startup. Computer unresponsive in minutes.

Again, I'm not *saying* there's a causal relationship... but I do find the timing somewhat suspicious.

I fucking HATE ORMs. Fuck this bullshit, they always have some use case that is stupidly difficult or obscure that no one knows how to deal with because the creators didn't think of the one thing I want to fucking do.

Screw this bullshit, homebrew SQL is ALWAYS the way to go; I've never encountered an ORM that didn't turn in to a troubleshooting, dialect-learning timesink.

God dammit, I hate my bloody coworker sometimes. He's doing a huge refactor, and committing... which is fine, but he's clearly NEVER run the fucking test suite. I didn't write that much coverage so you could commit something that breaks the build and then fuck off to lunch.

Not only has he not run the test suite, I don't think he's run his changes AT ALL. The bloody modules don't even import the way he's written it now.

Look, dude, I'm a busy man. Can you please not waste 15 minutes of my FUCKING time on your misunderstanding of code I FUCKING wrote? Code I wrote, apparently wrong, based on your SHITTY naming?

Christ alive, stop getting in my god damn way.

Architect: Oh hey Zaphod65, let me know when you're in. Some strangeness in [system], ta

Me: Already here actually [Archtect], what's up?

Architect: oh hi well let me do a little more digging. it may be in frontend

Me: ...

Why? Why do I *care* if you haven't even made sure it's my fault yet?!

Not only are you not your job, your job is not worth taking home with you; unless it's actually your company, leave it in the office. You can love your job and still have days when you hate it, or days when you'd rather be doing anything else; that doesn't mean you don't still like what you do.

As a profession we can all be obsessive and not take the time out that we need, so make special effort to do so, even if that just means you're working on a personal project instead. Your brain, and partner, will be glad that you did. Whether you like to admit it or not, everyone needs downtime.

Automatically generate unit tests for all the code I write.

!rant

There seem to be a lot of freelancers on here, how much experience do you all consider necessary to get in to freelancing? Is there anything you would say to someone who wants to get in to freelancing? How do any freelancers in the UK find their next contract?

Build it in Silverlight.

Full natural language processing

Searching for a new job in a different language than you have experience in. Seriously, no one seems to really understand that if you can code in one OO language then you can pretty much do them all!

I don't want to do PHP any more you fucks!

Current deploy process on the legacy project I'm on right now: ssh to server, check out branch with new feature, test on live, if it works then merge to master and check out master.

Oh... Oh no...

Guy sitting next to me on my morning commute working on a presentation called "Containerizing The Assembly Line"... I feel sorry for his devs if that's how he thinks of them.