When you're about to do a payment and the payment form is loaded without an SSL connection/certificate... Come on, it's 2017...

Programming in a nutshell

School time, programming class:
Girl: Hey, Can you help me?
Me: Sure, what's up?
G: I have an error but I don't know why
M: *looks at error stack trace* You're missing a semicolon in line 133 *puts comma, run... 27 more errors* Well, you have more issues up there, why don't you try to fix them?
G: Oh, Ok, thanks
-- 1 hour later --
G: Hey, can you come? I already fixed the other issues but I still have one I can't fix
M: *checks code, same mistake I fixed, missing semicolon, same line* Why did you erase the semicolon?
G: Oh, because if I erase it, I only have 1 error, but if I leave it, I have 27 so....
M: *turn around, walk away*

Truest truth

Nothing to say here...

Advice in our language...

When you have a bizarre bug that you can't consistently reproduce, but you're already past your deadline.

What your family thinks when you make a website

Jaja so true

[Begin Rant] When you show your senior manager your REST Web Service and he says "Oh no nooo... I don't wanna see no code"... Me: Code?? That ain't code you fat silly fucker it's the command line output data which I spent a week parsing, batch processing, and storing into the database! [End Rant] :[

🤔🤔🤔

I run a small business and sometimes I really think my employees are messing with me with the questions that they have about computers

programmers pickup lines

When the sales guy tries to speak technical with us /facepalm