Details
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AboutA collection of saucy atoms.
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SkillsUsed to write some Pawn for fun and some C for Uni. Professionally using .NET (C#) since 2015. exploring ops stuff for fun
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LocationGermany
Joined devRant on 9/28/2019
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So a little while back, my location was officially switched from "Specific Office Location" to "Home Office", i.e. I was finally _officially_ full-time WFH. The other day, I had to visit one of our physical offices for the first time in years. What I didn't realise until that point was that I HAVE to work from home: I have to access a specific VPN in the US to do my work, but you can't connect to any VPNs from within our office.
Genius.
🤦🏻♂️4 -
To the person that put the washing machine on at 4am, who hurt you? Coz I'm gonna be added to that list.13
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Open letter to any website that is trying to implement "smooth scrolling" on their website using JavaScript: stop, consider how awful it is 100% of the time, and kill yourself please.2
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What is it about long winded articles for a two second one click solution?
A quick search to find out how to change the control panel to classic view in windows 7. (because I forgot and the windows Operating system is no longer intuitive and Dev-friendly).
Search engine: (Insert hundreds of articles here!)
Solution: Click on large Icons where it says "View by".
Search engine: (Enjoy sifting through this pile of results written by thousands of gas-bags, you looser!).
Rocking back 'n forward sitting in the corner of the room holding my legs against my chest: "Shut up, I forgot okay!"
Why would it not just Say "Classic view"?1 -
Spent 3 hours not understanding why the exact same procedure on Linux worked while not in windows. Ended up installing Linux on the windows computer.5
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Fuckdev: I heard people were having meltdowns in certain more political corners of the interwebz, you figure out why, and so I went to read a little bit to see what was going on.
Truth be told, I did not expect this wild mask-off type shit, but it's interesting nonetheless. Malcolm X was proven right once again. I mean el Hajj Malek el Shabazz, dude. These bitches are indeed like foxes, showing their teeth but pretending to smile.
I'd feel bad for the poor fucks, hadn't they come out swinging against immigrants with a copy of Mein Kampf. Not so disgusted by the dextral folks, then? Sinister!
Anyway, having bore witness to such undeniable proof of their conceited wickedness, which makes them more than ever indistinguishable from what they merely *claim* to oppose, I am now at ease for thinking that the B-52 bomber with pride flag meme was kinda funny.42 -
Enough weaponised ADHD and ASD and I can do anything. As long as it's interesting. And doesn't take very long. And doesn't require dealing with people.6
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New developers(5-6 years experience) these days are so pathetic. They dont have any sense of code review. All they want is to put their opinion out without giving any thought.
I had a PR for review today which contains mock specification to match a regular expression and return the corresponding response
The regular expression I put was
104000(02|06|20|48)
Now, this guy comes and puts a comment that we could "simplify" as 104000\d{2}
I replied, the ending digits are not contiguous. The specific pair of digits have to match for these mocks.
Then this guy replied, then we could simplify as 104(0{4}(2|6)l0{3}(20|48)).
I said, I cannot understand how that is simplification. Why do we need such a complex regex to match something very straight forward.
And the guy replied, we should be writing proper regexes, otherwise we could just specify everything explicitly.
I was like WTF man. You try deciphering this next week without taking at least a minute to know which values are matched.
Anyhow, another senior person approved my PR, and I merged it.12 -
!dev
There’s this person at $work who never uses punctuation of any kind. She has mental issues and insists on neutral pronouns (and strongly advertises these) so I’ll use the indefinite to pretend to be respectful. It has multiple thoughts while typing a message and just keeps typing through all of them without stopping. It pauses not to collect its thoughts, to edit for clarity or to fix mistakes, to separate anything (including disjoint topics), to summarize, etc. (Though calling these “thoughts” is a huge stretch, given its lack of propensity for that particular subject.) It’s as if it has zero distinction between writing and speaking, and simply lets the mental diarrhea flow while their fingers do their best to keep pace. Reading these trainwrecks of thought — and gleaning any useful information from them — is always difficult and a little bit painful.
It is also in charge of IT security, which is more than a bit worrying. (But I hate the company with a passion, so it doesn’t bother me nearly as much as it otherwise would.)43 -
So, when hovering on that element in the bottom task bar in Windows 11, it shows those two icons (wifi and sound) grouped together.
Left click anywhere on that button and it opens the same menu.
But if you right click, now it suddenly depends if your cursor was on the one or on the other icon. It opens different menus!
Great UX! Good job, MS!13 -
There's a group of people at my work who have mean girls syndrome.
They think they're cool, but they're actually pretty lame. I'm loving it whenever a junior comes to me because they're fed up with these morons.
Don't get me wrong, I can't do fuckall, but I love to sit and watch the world burn. Hell, I'm waiting for end of contract to get away from this hellhole of a job, this shitty small town and its close-minded people.11 -
Caffeine meets every criteria for being a drug:
- Alters mental state
- Addictive
- Has withdrawal symptoms
- Tolerance increases with time
If you rely on caffeine to function, statistically, you spend the majority of your waking life in caffeine crush, longing for more and more caffeine to just function normally.
Face it: you’re a drug addict. Caffeine being legal doesn’t mean it’s not a drug.
I don’t do caffeine at all. I don’t drink sodas that have caffeine, I don’t drink tea either. That’s why I’m always full of energy. Yes, caffeine withdrawal gave me a week of terrible headaches, but I pushed through, and now my life is completely transformed.36 -
So I’ve requested images for the dark mode because the existing images are very bright and look bad when dark mode is enabled.
After a few days the designer says that it’s done and sends me the figma link.
And what do I see there? He added the screens but in dark mode with the same bright images! 😂
I mean… even if he misunderstood me… doesn’t it look odd to him?4 -
Every religion's idea of heII paIes in comparison to what one man can do to another man. “If there is a God, He will have to beg for my forgiveness.” This is a quote etched on the wall, inside one of the Mauthausen concentration camp cells.6
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If finally happened. My cats broke me down.
After years of spotty internet, in which I couldn't resolve websites, to which the solution always was to reach down and push the RJ45 jack with the broken off clip that connects my router to my pihole back in, because my cats pulled it out once again.
They made me do. They finally made me do it. After all those years. Today, my cat pulled it out like ten times in a row... So I finally did it. I walked over in the other room, grabbed a new cable and plugged that one it.
Try that again, cat. I dare you. Try it again!1 -
So yeah, I kind of thought it was exaggerated, and above all, not anywhere outside fucking woke Spain.
I just had a Moroccan today not only molest my friend, but also literally tell me (after watching two girls go home on their own) "let's go after them, they can't do anything against us."
Am writing from the police station now, hopefully they will lend me a baton to beat him up some more.26 -
so, I quit my corporate 9-5 job in 2020. and decided to move out of the field completely.
Moved to a small, tier 3 city, joined my family manufacturing business, cut off my circle, and completely shut my laptop....
...for 4 months.
then started developing solutions for my business, inventory management, invoicing, accounting, and other small apps.
and finally, after 3 years, in 2023, decided to move back to IT. but not as an employee this time, but as an enterpreneur.
developed a social media app, called Dialogbaaz.
probably coding is a disease that doesnt seem to go away. lets see where it finally takes me!4 -
Alright fellow sweaty programmers, mama Kiki is here to teach you the basics of hygiene.
TEETH
- If you have a toothpaste prescription, use it.
- Every single whitening toothpaste is a scam. Don’t use them.
- Every single over-the-counter toothpaste that decreases sensitivity does work. If your teeth are sensitive, use it.
- Otherwise, buy the cheapest name-brand toothpaste.
- Use dental floss. As long as it’s flat and waxed, the cheapest one will do.
- When flossing, never move the floss back and forth as if you try to saw through your gums. Just put the floss in, then out. Repeat if necessary.
- Don’t put your toothpaste on your toothbrush. Put a small amount of it directly in your mouth with a bit of water. Close your mouth and spread toothpaste all over your teeth using a rinsing motion, as if it was mouthwash. Now your teeth are completely covered.
- When brushing teeth, don’t use -90°/0°/90° angles. Use -35°/35°. This way you will spend less time while getting better cleansing. Bristle ends should touch where your teeth meet your gums.
- Get yourself a tongue scrubber. Scrub your tongue until what comes off of it is clean. Dirty tongue is why your breath smells bad, not dirty teeth.
- After you’re done, don’t rinse! Spit the toothpaste out, but let its residue stay there. The remineralization process is now started. If you follow the routine, you don’t need mouthwash at all.
- Drinking/eating sugary things, not washing your teeth and going straight to bed is the best way to get cavities ASAP. In your mouth, sugar quickly turns into the kind of acid that we use for soldering. It can strip the oxide layer off of copper. Do you know how after you drink Coke, your teeth become almost squeaky clean? That’s this. If you like sugary drinks, carefully drink them using a straw. Rinse immediately after you’re done drinking & eating.
SHAVING
- Get yourself an old-school safety T-razor, the one that takes suicide blades. It will last a lifetime. Mühle and Merkur are good manufacturers (not affiliated). Once you have it, for the rest of your life, you will only buy blades. This is the most environmentally friendly way to get a clean, close shave. Electric razors save water, but they often contain batteries.
- Because of how violently electric razor’s blades hit hair while cutting it, they chip your hair. This leads to your freshly grown hair being sharp, rough and unpleasant to the touch. The manual razor, on the other hand, produce clean edges. When your hair grows back, it will be softer than what you get with an electric razor.
- Feather brand blades (not affiliated) are the sharpest in the world. The sharper the blade, the less traumatic it is. Watch T-razor tutorials on YouTube. There are different shaving techniques that will get you a killer shave.
- T-razor blades last considerably longer than their modern soyboy single-use counterparts.
- Because of a single blade construction, T-razor almost never leaves irritation.
- Basically, modern single-use plastic blades are horrible for the environment, and they’re almost a scam for how much you get for your money. They’re only rivaled by printer ink. Use them only for intimate shaving, as they’re considerably handier down there.
- Always shave after hot shower.
- Before shaving, dry the skin surface. Apply shaving foam on dry skin only, as it contains chemicals that make your hair softer. When diluted, they’re not as effective, and shaving unsoftened hair is almost always unpleasant and dangerous.
- After applying the foam, wait about a minute for the foam to work. If the skin gets irritated, don’t wait for as long, or perhaps try a different foam brand.
- Before shaving, thoroughly clean your razor with hand sanitizer or ethanol. Ideally, it should be sterile. Using boiling hot water is also a good option, just be careful with it.
- After shaving, rinse off foam, immediately dry your skin with a clean towel, then apply aftershave. After applying it, don’t touch your skin until it completely dries. If you follow this routine, your skin won’t get any pimples, guaranteed.
- Scrubs won’t help you. Don’t use them.
More in the comments!11 -
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Holy fuck, I hate the internet8 -
I have an unreasonable phobia of bugs, but I never really feared wasps. I still don't, actually. They mostly just mind their own, sure they carry a weapon, but if I remain calm they aren't as trigger-happy as most policemen.
BUT GOD DAMN IT, if this FUCKING STRIPED DUMBASS decides to crawl under my wrist while I'm typing, hidden completely from view, in total silence, standing on a hard surface with something obviously alive above its head, I feel like it DESERVES to get squished and it should take it without a retaliatory strike against the densest collection of nerve endings on exposed skin on a human body. FUCK. I can't even type right, pure anger fuelled me through this rant.3