Business Analyst: What language is this on the test site?
Me: I believe that's Latin
BA: But why? No one can read what it says
Me: 😂

I posted a rant a while back about a contract I was working that was making me particularly unhappy.

I didn't notice at the time but my studies had taken a turn for the worse, my concentration had begun to wane and I started struggling to finish work.

I was miserable and the client had figured and pulled me up on it, I turned the working relationship around and the client was happy.

That was two weeks ago, Monday I was called into a room with the managers, manager straight to the point "contract is being cut short" (I was contracted to the end of the year but was seriously considering handing my notice in that day anyway).

They made the decision for me, awesome!

Also I was given the two weeks notice as paid but asked not to come to the office again and had to hand in all my equipment that day.

Could I have been that much of an arsehole to deal with that they thought it would be better for all concerned that I have no further dealing with any of them?

Talking to teammates it does appear that I was getting special treatment from management, I think if it is me I need to address this before moving on to the next contract so I don't get myself in the same predicament.

Although two weeks paid leave was a quite nice bonus 👍

How does everyone feel about morning and evening updates with a summary email detailing what was said in the evening call?

I have an attitude problem with not treating colleagues with respect (apparently) I emailed the concerned party and apologised profusely for my (perceived) behaviour and attitude towards them clarifying that there was no animosity and that I'm just a blunt person.

They responded with 🤔 u wot m8? Well actually, "it's been a stressful couple of months but theres no feelings that you talk to me or address me disrespectfully"

So basically, what happened (I'm a contractor) is I refused to work weekends for a day rate, or evenings.

And my managers boss has been salty after with me ever since.

Thing is they're talking to me like I'm a member of the staff? I don't even work for them as I'm sub contracted ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I have had my resignation letter signed and attached to an email to my agency but I haven't sent it

"Can you confirm you got my email" emails...

The company I'm contracted to have just realised they're a tad behind with product delivery after the Development Manager and his second in command left. Leaving two contractors and one junior member of staff to deal with the backlash of "wtf is going on with x product why is it not delivered?".

Company: "Ok we're going to need to do overtime, you guys will be willing to work overtime on weekend and nights, right?"
Me: "What's the rate?"
Company: "It's day rate is that going to be an issue?"
Me: *mutes phone to pmsl*
Company: "We're all up against it so we all have to help out"
Me: "Not interested in a day rate for overtime, thanks"
Company: "Your holiday you have booked in two weeks time, can it be moved?"
Me: *laughs* "No I won't be cancelling my holiday to work"
Company: *salty as fuck now* "Well the question needed to be asked"
Me: "I'm not cancelling a holiday I have paid for to make up for a lack of planning"

I come in the office today and Mr Company has fucked off on a three week holiday!

Phone rings, recruiter: "hi Scott just come across your CV and really want to talk to you about an exciting opportunity"
Me: "Ok, cool, can I just qualify this call, what was the keyword search you used to find my profile?"
Recruiter: "it's for a Java developer role for an exciting employer"
Me: "so you matched me on a Java training course I did 8 years ago?"
Recruiter: "ok, but I see you're fully qualified in c#"
Me: "you mean the support developer role from 5 years ago?"
Recruiter: "yes"
Me: "😑"
Recruiter: "listen it's a pretty bad line can I call you on a land line or drop you an email?"
Me: "sure drop me an email with your contact details and I'll give you a call back"

Still waiting on that email...

Why can't recruiters just admit straight away that they blindly called you without even reading your CV

OMG! This!

I was looking at the lowest-valued company in the stock market for kicks and found their candidate description for a web dev. Says it all... https://t.co/JFNdjFTsjo

From Twitter: https://twitter.com/jmeaspls/...

Recruiters that call you "to have a chat".

I find this more offensive than the ones that call you frantically wanting to talk to you because you popped up on a keyword search that matches one word in your profile.

Why do they do this? I quite often think it's some form of social engineering and am immediately on the offensive because they have called with no clear intent.

A lot of effort went into this job description. Well done recruiter, well done 👍

Ok, all checks out just fine!

Expert, Entry Level?

How do you politely tell the person that sits next to you the sound of them loudly slurping their hot beverage each afternoon makes you want to bitchslap that mug out of their hand. I'm going for a walk now

My dear JavaScript Dev friends is this a good day rate for a JS developer?

At £220 a day, I think I'll stick with VBA for now if that's the case.

Recruiters, do you even copy pasta!!

Just discovered I still have access to my old employers source code on VSTS, and can see from here that that there is a new team member!?

👿 I was made redundant "times are tough, there's not enough money, you were last in so first out" mother of fuck!

I wonder how many other places do this sort of thing.

Do you read it as Mongo-D or Mon-God?

This is why I can't go to Christmas parties 😥

THIS!
Best office coffee machine, ever!

Ok, local to me? I'm based in London

Then it just get worse and worse

My Friday night with my 8 year old showing me Scratch 👍 #ParentingGoals

What they say:

Call from recruiter, “Hi Scott just seen your profile on LinkedIn and think you will be a really good match for a role I’m recruiting for”

what it actually means:

“you have come up in my keyword search and I'm blindly calling you, I haven’t really read your profile”

Performing triage=propping up shitty production code.

Every PM, ever!

So I have spent some time playing with Python, but as I understand it JavaScript is the language I should learn first?

I'm a fully fledged VBA Developer of 10+ years btw

Thought I better learn a useful language now though 😂

Oh wait, this is my code!
You're a dick past me!!

Shortest Android dev training course, 7 taps! I am now android development, yes? 😂

All these emails are for one role, I counted 12 phone calls as well