Talking to google assistant in Allo feels like talking to your that friend who has some random link ready for every damn topic.

Conversation with my older sister

Me: "open CMD and enter command"
Big sis: *enters command*
Me: "Look for Ethernet Adapter"
Her: "What?? I can't see it"

*pause 'cause I'm confused*

Her: "Wait, was I supposed to press enter?"
Me: ...

when you really get into deep conversation with allo about siri

!rant

He always comes to my desk when i begin to work, and lays there. So calm.

Almost 3 years ago I contacted an IT company that was looking for developers. The job listing was vague at best but it was a 10 man company with huge international clients for content migration and improvement.

I had basically no prior development experience but got invited to the interview regardless. I took a test in Java, first time I had seen the language but I finished it with some help from Google. At the time I was still a student so I couldn't work full time either.

Disregarding all that, the team lead advised the CEO to hire me regardless, so he did.

Forward to today.

I still proudly work for this company and have been responsible for a complete redesign of their flagship product. I learned a great deal about software development and developed an amazing relationship with most of the employees. The company has quadrupled in size since and we are moving to a bigger office start of next year.

Sometimes life gives you gold, not lemons.

Thanks for the reality check google :(

Tons of new faces here 🙌🏼

My grandma saw me programming for one whole day and she started to rant.

Grandma: "She's been sitting all day infront of her computer doing computer stuff! Electricity bill's getting higher!"
Mum: "Well at least she's not out late at night getting drunk and partying!"
Grandma: "Computer girl"

One component is used over 30,000 times. How many unit tests do you think we have for it? Zero. Fucking zero, Zip, Zilch, Nada, None.

WHAT THE QA FUCK!?

Writes program.
Doesn't comment code.
*Yeah totally gonna remember everything* 🕶

*5 weeks later*
what the heck was I writing.? 🙄😥😭

The computer science department at my university is located in the basement. I know I'm supposed to get real world experience, but what a sick joke! /s

Guess who refused the the request to return at work after being fired unfairly? After months they understood they're wrong and they need me or just they noticed that no one wants to work in those conditions?

Apple vs Orange

Just spent 2 hours to write 5 lines of code.
But those 5 lines are worth 500 :)

my eyes hurts so much