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Search - "thread dump"
Client: the app is slow
me: can you upload a thread dump to the ticket?
Client: here *uploads 2GB catalina.out.gz*6
## Scripting myself out of the company
who needs an expensive profiler, when you can make thread dumps and compile them into a flamegraph for free without any risk of outages!
Though what bothers me is that I'm yet to come across a person in this company who knows how to read them (besides me)...
Are flamegraphs really THAT unpopular?
I mean.. you can represent the whole profile in a single image!9
I swear the God I'm considering getting a rabied dog just to bite your balls off in case I ever see you in the streets..
- guys X are running load tests on env A
- load tests complete
- analysis of test results is being done
- slow response times are obsered
- someone asks whether X guys took a thread dump for further analysis
- a guy from team X (Mr. Xx) replies: "Will take the Thread Dump now."
- 10 minutes later uploads the whole fucking 2GB log file to Slack
- Xx replies: "I do not see anything wrong in the dump"
A fucking retard... Shove that useless dump up your ass and THEN tell me there's nothing wrong with it! Why the FUCK do you think that's the case? Moron1