I often don't see devs sad about the lack of sex in their lives.

Is it because we get fucked in the ass by management every now and then, to make up for it?

facebook in 2025: “we deleted our privacy policy”

I could use some advice. Immagine this: you recently started a new job where the people are great, the product is pretty cool and pay is good. But the code you have to work with is the biggest pile of shite you've ever seen and your manager does not want to change any of this, even after you suggest you would build something that would be a thousand times better, not only "code wise" but for the users too. What would you do?

This week is the week of planning ahead for the whole left year upto beginning of next year.

My tongue has muscle soreness, my brains gyri are straightened out, my throat is hoarse... And talking really feels like licking a cactus.

I. Hate. Talking.

Just one more day with 8 hours of meetings.

*drools*

Why did the computer go to the doctor? Was it feeling a bit poorly? No, it had a virus. It turns out even computers aren't immune to catching something nasty. I mean, can you imagine a world where even the machines are getting sick? Oh wait, we already live in that world - it's called Windows.

Our stand-up meetings last for 1 hour. Everybody talks for 5+ minutes so they will seem look "productive" in front of the managers.

I am really going nuts about everyone using ChatGPT. Had literally discussions 'bUt cHaTgPt sAyS iTs TrUe', when the docs said clearly thats not the case.

Also the "code" produced is just what the hell?!

I hope this damn hype will end soon

I've been debugging a bug for two days straight and I have only thing to say:

fuck javascript a piece of shit

This is a post on devrant.com. reply to it like an average devrant user would:

HTML is a programming language.

Ah yes, the four genders

Throughout my career I've blocked a total of three toxic clients.

They still find me via email.

Most recently, I've gotten an email simply asking "how does BitBucket work and how can I use it?"

LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!

Favorite place to work on your code:

My bed of course I enjoy lying down on my stomach. But then after over an hour when I get up. I walk like this for the rest of the day:
👴🏿
<((>
\\

The RGB makes the code run faster

Two probable reasons why people don't mind their own business:

1. No mind
2. No business

I'm really excited to meet our intern, she's coming next week 😊😊

I feel like I'm getting a little sister

Thought there’d be peeps here who could relate.

The work of a freelancer is never done 😑

In pair programming session with intern. She deletes something she shouldn't have.

Me: No, wait, don't delete that, undo.
Intern: ...
Intern: What is undo? How do I do that?
Me: ...
Me: *cringes internally*
Me: Uhm.
Me: Go to Edit > Undo, or press Ctrl+Z

I think I understand what is wrong, this poor individual has extremely rudimentary computer literacy skills worse than my 77-year old stepdad's and someone in management decided to give her a Junior Software Engineering position (actually paid internship) which is doing more harm than good.

FUCK ANDROID, FUCK SDK AND FUCK GRADLE

Has anyone else noticed salaries dropping a bit for devs on job listings? Seems to be 20k less a year than they were advertising before!

Recession hitting it seems!

Boss: misses zoom meeting

9PM: Boss calls me to catch up with the meeting he missed

😡

Half way through a 2 hour deployment, and a fucking test fails.
Yes, it takes 2+hours to run the tests.

Rerun in test environment: pass
Rerun in prod: pass
Rerun changed test in prod: fail..

Why, why you got to hate me for?
I love it when production is the place where config gets changed.

Reddit: Every developer eventually either goes insane or becomes a farmer.

Dev: …I hope I become a farmer

Did anyone notice that a teenager spend $11 to crack elon's Twitter?

So uh... I got fired today. I asked them what could be the reasons. They told me that I am "capable" and a bunch of positive things. I asked them can't the reason they fire me is due to all the positive things. Is there a particular reason?

I asked them the reasons again and again. They say was all fine.

Then the email stated I am fired due to "Not working, not contributing and underperforming". Which I asked them to clarify.

They say they prefer someone who has a corporate mentality and is obedient. As more ideas will cause "unrest" for the company.

I am genuinely confused.

Anyway, I am back to freelancing.

This is what happens when you decide to trust your clients’ intuitiveness

It has been a rough day dealing with third party vendors, who only have a few IQ points to share among the company. Nothing better to cheer me up than listening to my favourite Christmas song

Just do it!™️

For real.
Thinking about writing an app? just do it!

Thinking about creating a website? Just do it!

Thinking about the game? You just lost!

Every time!! Have you faced a similar situation?? Comment below👇

On Chronic Stress Medication😊