I solved a big problem today. It made me feel fuckng amazing. I like my job.

P.S. I'm a QA Engineer

Stuck in a loop called life. Where is the fucking return statement.

😂🤣🤣🤣🤣

Getting comfortable in one place for too long and stagnating. It can be easy to automate your job until you can just milk it, but sit still too long and your skills will be irrelevant.

People talk about ageism in development... don't let your mind get old and you'll always have job security.

Production is down, a coworker got himself locked in his own apartment so he can’t leave and another is late, the phone won’t stop ringing

And I don’t have the credentials to access the production server

Just a monday morning, everything’s fine 🔥😊🔥

Downloading all kinds of icons for a project from this website and kept having the feeling that I was missing something.

Everything finally downloaded aaaaaaand I’m realizing I had to download them in three colors instead of black.

Well I guess I’ll just go fuck myself 😑

My conversation with a recruiter today.

Recruiter: we have looked through your profile and we are very interested in your experience and projects you have been working on we are keen to process your application please send us your resume asap.

Me: sure thing * sends CV.

Recruiter: oh yeah your not what we are looking for.

Me: Oh no problem you sound like a great recruitment agency.

Recruiter: what do you mean?

Me : so you "looked at my profile" which has all the information identical to my resume for a job which requires 10 years worth of experience in a software which was only released 6 months ago. Why don't you learn to ride a bike and then in 10 years time. Ride a hover bike first time without falling off and I will assess wherever or not you have the experience on first glance. Don't waste my time again.
Mother Fuckers!

Needless to say I did not get a reply 😂

What do you call a bee which comes from america?
.
.
.
.
.
USB
.
.
Yup im out🤣🤣

Look guys what my Mom made for me :D

Y'all are ranting about Microsoft GitHub when Apple decides to deprecate OpenGL support on macOS.

https://developer.apple.com/macos/...

Gaming on Mac? Pah, Linux is where the fun happens.

"Don't give your 100%. Never. Once you gave, managers will start expecting more than that." - My mentor.

IT can be such a thankless job.

Getting married to a female dev sounds cool, until she starts setting up a trello board for house tasks.🙅

No, I'm not "switching to FTP," it's about time your learn git mate.

Does the devrant store "have" to be called a "swag" store? It makes me feel like I'm a teenage Justin Bieber fan when I browse it, for some reason..

Asynchronous No. Hmmm.

I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown due to all the pressure at work, and my boss sat me down one day and said "Don't take it so personally, it's only work".
He explained that you simply cannot make all the people happy all the time, you can only do your best, and that is good enough.

Guys, I am getting married in one hour 🎉

Hey everyone! @trogus and I are headed to TechDay New York tomorrow (May 10) and there will be a devRant booth in the social network section. If any devRanters are attending, you should definitely stop by our booth! There will be free swag and we’d love to meet some fellow ranters!

Nice, I just removed my dpkg folder instead of dpkg/lock. Today is the first and only day for this week I can sit at my desk to work and this is first thing I did. And then I whine that I'm stressed and couldn't finish my tasks.

If I were not me, I would slap that-guy.

When I joined my team in august as a junior/trainee, we were 6 developers.

Now we are 4 left in the team.

By the end of june, we are 1.. I mean its me, myself and I.

Wtf did I do!? My code isnt that spaghetti. I think...

But its np, just me with a 20 years old database, 7 legacy systems and a new one planned.

Atleast my boss believes in me keeping this shit floating.

God bless those developers who give you a dark theme for their apps

Thank you, GIT. Thank you. Your reflog saved work of months after someone deleted the wrong branch.

!rant

I had a second stage technical interview for a job today. I met three devs who prodded my experience and gave me a task to do (design a complete system architecture for registering sheep, I got ten minutes). I think it went well because after the interview they invited me out for dinner!

Feels good! I might become a consultant soon.

My laptop just took a full cup of coffee and didn't blink an eye.

Thank god for spill resistant stuff that works.

Unfortunately I now how to make a new coffee, so it's not all good news.

i love programming cz it's fucking awesome

Me: I don't spend the prime of my life watching series, I code, I develope, I learn

* Discovers Silicon Valley *

😓

Dev: Microsoft is shit

VS Code: (ಥ⌣ಥ)

Dev: Oh not you dear! You're not like the other guys

VS Code: (｡◕‿◕｡)

Yesterday. It took me way to long to figure out why my mouse wasn't working....
Thanks, dear colleagues!

😐

The world is about to end