Details
-
About10+ years of mobile and dev in general. 4 years as team lead. 3 as architect.
-
Skillspython, java, go, bash, team lead, architect, devops, fuken javascript
Joined devRant on 4/5/2017
Join devRant
Do all the things like
++ or -- rants, post your own rants, comment on others' rants and build your customized dev avatar
Sign Up
Pipeless API
From the creators of devRant, Pipeless lets you power real-time personalized recommendations and activity feeds using a simple API
Learn More
-
!rant
“Are you drinking my soda?”
“Statute of limitations!”
“Did you know in some countries there’s a statute of limitations on murder?”
“And?”
“And that means sometimes it can run out.”
“And?”
“And that means you can’t be tried for the crime.”
“Are you threatening me?”
“What? No. Why?”
*gestures at soda* “You literally told me that after I took your soda.”
“Oh! Shit. You mentioned statute of limitations, _that_ was the connection, it wasn’t a response to you stealing my soda.”
“You looked me right in the eye and told me that some countries have a statute of limitations on murder.”
“I looked you in the eye because we were having a conversation!”2 -
I've officially entered my 30s.
I ate food the wrong way and my entire left torso hurts.
Yeah .... this is how it starts isn't it20 -
Client: "When can you deliver this feature, so we can move on?"
Me: "Well, by the end of the week could be feasible."
Client: "Perfect!"
Me at the end of the week: "It is finished."
Client: "Thanks!"
Client proceeds to not use the feature for over 3 months.5 -
every project leader's project is the most important!!!!!!!! not the others!!!!
fullstackclown! do this now!!!!!!
it's apes trying to impress apes, all the way down5 -
Saying "Java is the best programming language because it works across all platforms" is the same as saying "Butt sex is the best form of sex because it works across all of the animal kingdom"10
-
Yay, our 2FA of our accounts for the stores are linked to the phone number of the CTO who has left the company10
-
My production build has a bug that the debug build doesn't. A bug that makes no sense, while all unsafe code in the program is on dead paths, and my recent changes should only affect niche multithreaded scenarios but the bug appears in the single threaded case.8
-
XCode: I can't find your class in scope
Me: But it's right there. You could find it yesterday
XCode: Yeah, no.
Me: Look, if I cmd-click on it, you open the class. So you know what it is. It is in scope. It has to be.
XCode: Nope.
Me: *cleans build folder* *build* How about now?
XCode: Nope.
Me: *deletes derived data* *build* Now?
XCode: Nope.
Me: *buries head in hands* *swears* *Copies the text in the class file, deletes the file, recreates it with a slightly different file name, copies the text back in* *build*
XCode: Build complete.
For fucks sakes.4 -
Why do people can't take 5 seconds to do a null check in 99% of the cases ?
"Oh I just assume it cannot be null"
Right, still take fucking 5 seconds to check it.
So tired looking at logs and seeing thousands of "nullpointerexception".
You can literally use it wuith "?" propagation
"But I defined in my coe that variable is never null using c# nullability!"
yeah moron, it makes compilator happy. It does not garanty that your variable will be not null. It wiull throw exception !
Damn.... If I die, my hell will be full of null pionters.9 -
just a reminder
if you think your 500 line python script with garbage hardcode values everywhere that brittly functions even for you is going to bring you thousands in subscriptions
fuck you7 -
WhatsApp and Telegram should consider a feature to disable voice messages from all contacts or all contacts but close friends.
I'm getting tired of getting tech support requests from acquaintances I haven't hung out with in years but when these are too lazy even to type and I have to take type and listen to their muttered voice notes I get crazy5 -
Open AI Sora. The moment an open source alternative is available, can you imagine the shitshow?
Fake videos of <group X> doing <bad thing> spread everywhere, politician videos, real videos of atrocities being dismissed as AI, AI porno videos of classmates, fake historical videos, etc. the amount of propaganda this will generate is going to overrun the internet even more than GPT trash already does.
Or maybe nothing will change other than news outlets being even less reliable.2 -
c++ has a little bit of a learning curve, I think.
Used smart pointers everywhere in my code because I heard that's what we gotta do nowadays.
When learning about shared vs unique vs weak, I disregarded weak pointers because I didn't really understand them.
"That sounds like something for liberal pansies", I said to myself, then continued on with my STRONG shared and unique pointers.
Now my app leaks memory like a MOTHERFUCKER, if you can believe that.
So now I need to go back and manage my object lifetime with more intent instead of just making everything a shared pointer. Fuckin circular references. Fuckin reaping what I fuckin sow. God damn.9 -
Woohooo, I'm going to Tokyo!
Our paper was accepted to a robotics conference. We have the pleasure of playing with tiny drones, and we get paid and rewarded for it!
(The girl in the video is my amazing collaborator, Hanna)
https://youtube.com/watch/...15 -
So we have a new guy at our company. I don't know what his job description is, pretty sure not a dev. He comes to the devs and asks how to connect a printer. Some things that ran through my mind:
1. How did you get in the door?
2. There is this place called "Google".
3. Fucking figure it out! (This is my boss's attitude on a lot of things, and I have adopted this as well. Yes, ask for help when stumped, but you better have made an effort.)
Then I remembered this part from Super Star:
https://youtu.be/22F6AnqPGxg?t=19
What I did say was this: "I don't have a PHD cert. Printer Help Desk." It got a good laugh. Somebody else helped him when they had a chance. I think if I had helped I might have sent him things to search on Google. This is not a difficult skill to acquire. Problem solving skills are paramount in this company.2 -
The field of Machine Learning is so disappointing.
It's all about identifying data distributions and doing computations on them.
Apparently even generative models just know the possibile distributions in advance and build data around noise?
InNoVaTiOn2 -
In the 10th circle of Hell, we find those developers whose UI components move just as you're about to click/tap them.
Amongst other things, these accursed souls find that, when they go to sit down on the bog, a millisecond before their arse makes contact, the whole bathroom inexplicably moves 14 inches to the left so they actually sit on the handle of the brush.
Or they go to open a door, and just as their fingers are about to touch the handle, the handle is magically replaced by a live wolverine.2 -
I love them shitty scammy singles dating ads.
"Hot Single Volcanos Are Looking For Dates In Your Area."
And
"once you play this game, your friends won't be seeing much of you!"
Also merry chrysler!3 -
Is it possible to continue file upload for android default browser without the browser being open?
I’ve been tasked by a company to make it so video and photo files can continue being uploaded from an app even when that app is closed. Slight issue is that the app is just a web viewer that goes to a web app.
I know this is convoluted but would the only way to do that be to overlay an actual upload button over the web view so that I can use androids built in service to do that and make a whole new way for the file to be uploaded to the server?
Surely there must be an easier way.14 -
I've never solved any LeetCode problems.
I've never gotten grades above 80% in my academics.
I've never taken an online course in anything.
I've never gotten any certifications other than my Master's degree.
I've never written a CV for a job application.
How the fuck did I manage to survive for 7 years in this industry?13 -
I'm still looking for a job after more than two months. Never thought I'd say this but after all these interviews I'm starting to prefer live coding tests over take home assignments. You spend a few hours preparing by reading interview guides (the interviewers usually get their questions from these same guides) and then you either do well or fuck up but it's all over in a few hours and you move on with your life.5