Hacker uses windows media player to hack into police database....

//Happens only in Indian movies

PS : don't try it at home.

Internet Explorer:
You type a local IP without the protocol.
It doesn't add http automatically.
It doesn't add https automatically.
IT TRIES TO SEARCH IT ON BING

I freaking hate IE

I've been doing programming as a hobby since I was 10 years old, I've always found my teachers are good at IT but not that good in Computer Science and programming, this year a new teacher joined the IT department who has actual experience in programming etc.
Our school uses two services, a rewards system which for some reason can also show our timetable, and another service for displaying our homework. In my spare time I made a project which combined these two services and showed it to him. As the first teacher with actual programming experience he was impressed and now I get to 'pitch' my project to the teachers higher up.

TLDR; It's good to have a good teacher

✔Grails is broken
✔Gradle is broken
✔ Spring is broken
✔ Tomcat is failing

Time to create a new VM.

Source /r/ProgrammerHumor

I once encountered a developer who said "make your code obscure and only you can understand, so that they(company) will never let you go" bcoz you the only one can solve it. WhatTheFuck!?

WTF!! I want a JavaScript solution.. not jQuery!! When JavaScript mentioned in the question, why the hell people answer with jQuery solution and also same solution multiple times.

Who can relate?

This junior dev is killing me with all of the bugs in the code ... like did you even test it to see if it works fml

To my coworker who gets notifications 5 times a minute:

PUT YOUR F**KING PHONE ON SILENT, YOU NEANDERTHAL!!!

Jeeze, it's like some people have ZERO workplace etiquette 😡😡😡

Look at the code on that fuckin screen.

I have been working on a project I call Pipelines. The idea behind the project is that it will be a centralized dashboard for you to receive Webhooks on. [more details]

Calling it a good day :D

What do you call a snake that’s exactly 3.14 feet long?

A πthon

MOTHER FUCKER IDIOTS!!!

SO I HAVE TO ROLLBACK OUR PROD DEPLOYMENT BECAUSE IM THE ONLY FUCKER WHO UNDERSTANDS THE SIMPLE CONCEPT OF "DONT PUSH UNFINISHED CHANGES"?!?
DAMN!!!! FUCK YOU ALL...

Manager: a person who thinks changing the whole logic of the app only takes 30 sec, but changing the site header should take 5 hour!

My last night:
- Had nothing much to work on.
- Opened a porn site to spend sometime.
- Clicked on some really good video.
- Realized full screen isn't working on the page.
- Fired up JS console, spent the next 30 minutes trying to get the video part full screen. Failed!
- Opened up Google & navigated through stackoverflow looking for the fix. Still couldn't do it.
- Cursed the website for having a bad design.
- Left the site.

Bad UI = No Fuck.

Can't stop laughing.... Brilliant post...

Forbes has, by far, the shittiest and most user-unfriendly website I've ever gone to, in this gigantic clusterfuck we call the Internet. I honestly don't understand how they felt their site design is OK. Fuck their dev team manager.

Let's run down some of its worst offenses, shall we? FORCED ANTI-ADBLOCK, shitton of ads (some of which are extremely invasive and dangerous), autoplaying sidebar video WITH SOUND ON, that fucking social sidebar & collapsed navigation, and their mind-bogglingly irrelevant, frustratingly obnoxious, & totally pointless Quote of the Day, which itself has ads and A FORCED COUNTDOWN to go to the fucking article you went there to read to begin with.

The articles themselves on Forbes are solid, so why do they have to ruin it with this shit? I will never go to a Forbes link again. No article is worth facing their torture chamber.

TLDR: Fuck you Forbes, your site is absolutely the shittiest on the entire web (which is quite a feat).

!Rant: The collection is complete! Stress balls and stickers all the way here in Trinidad and Tobago. Thanks @dfox and co.

I was once at a hackathon and got into a team with some people out of the same company. They brought all of their fancy tools with them, which no one understood except for them.
They ended up doing all of the back-end and I designed a f***** logo, some slides and bored myself to death for the remaining 18 hours or so.

is it just me or daily stand ups feels like a bunch of virgins sharing thier first time feelings and details ...

The Guy in front of me is not using dark theme in IntelliJ :O

Oh Google! I didn't expect that!
Saw this in today's newspaper ad (23/11/16)

I am building an ecommerce site and the client is asking me to hide the product prices because he doesn't want his competitors to see his prices. He also thinks it is a smart move not to allow users create an account and use it immediately. He wants to manually approve every user that signs up.
Why do people who know nothing always argue with us when it comes to our job?

Corporate proxies that block resources web developers can't work without are the worst, preventing npm and composer from working at all. Easier to work from home than at work.

Dutch developers talk about life and death alarmingly often... Until you realize they actually mean "live" and "dev".

You: O(n^3)
The guy she tells you not to worry about: O(n*log n)

I just quit my job for a better one. Damn....

Already existing website, I was asked to do a few things to redo. Code is a mess, 0 comments, oldschool technology. Completely static html site of a small company, nothing extreme.

Client: okay, could you please add 2 more items to the navbar for the 2 new pages?
Me: yes, here they are. Since it was already full, font size had to shrink.
Client: it's okay

>> Fast forward 2 weeks, full of similarly easy modifications.

Client: could you make the font size of the navbar larger?
Me: not really, we will lose responsivity
Client: do it anyway!

>> Fast forward to next day
Client calls me that it is urgent to 'do something immediately' with the navbar because it is broken and I am a 'horrible webdesigner' for making a mess of her website. I was told that it is not her job to make it good look and that I should 'use my eyes better'.

After 2 minutes of a lecture on webdesign she let me tell her how a responsive website should look like and to achieve that we should better restart the whole website. At that point I was the idiot who just wants to get more money and that I won't be able to do that since I am already unable to finish these few tiny things she asked for.