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-
Sit down before you read this.
So I interviewed a guy for a "Support Engineer" internship position.
Me and the team lead sit down and are waiting for him to enter, but apparently he's actually making a coffee in the kitchen.
This isn't exactly a strike since the receptionist told him that he can go get a drink, and we did too. It's just always expected for him to get a glass of water, not waste 3 minutes brewing a coffee.
In any case he comes in, puts the coffee on the table, then his phone, then his wallet, then his keys and then sits on our side of the table.
I ask him to sit in front of us so we can see him. He takes a minute to pack and tranfer himself to the other side of the table. He again places all of the objects on the table.
We begin, team lead tells him about the company. Then I ask him whether he got any questions regarding the job, the team or the company . For the next 15 minutes he bombards us with mostly irrelevant and sometimes inappropriate questions, like:
0: Can I choose my own nickname when getting an email address?
1: Does the entire department get same salaries?
2: Are there yoga classes on Sundays only or every morning?
3: Will I get a car?
4: Does the firm support workspace equality? How many chicks are in the team?
5: I want the newest grey Mac.
And then.. Then the questions turn into demands:
6: I need a high salary (asks for 2.5 more than the job pays. Which is still a lot).
I ask him why would he get that at his first job in the industry (remind you, this is an internship and we are a relatively high paying company).
He says he's getting paid more at his current job.
His CV lists no current job and only indicates that he just finished studying.
He says that he's working at his parent's business...
Next he says that he is very talented and has to be promoted very quickly and that we need to teach him a lot and finance his courses.
At this point me and the team lead were barely holding our laughs.
The team lead asks him about his English (English is not our native language).
He replies "It's good, trust me".
Team lead invites him for an English conversation. Team lead acts like a customer with a broken internet and the guy is there to troubleshoot. (btw that's not job related, just a simple scenario)
TL: "Hello, my name is Andrew, I'm calli..."
Guy: *interrupts* "Yes, yes, hi! Hi! What do you want?"
TL: "Well, if you let me fi..."
Guy: "Ok! Talk!"
TL: "...inish... My internet is not working."
Guy: "Ok, *mimics tuning a V engine or cooking a soup* I fixed! *points at TL* now you say 'yes you fixed'".
Important to note that his English was horrible. Disregarding the accent he just genuinely does not know the language well.
Then he continiues with "See? Good English. Told you no need to check!".
After about half a minute of choking on out silent laughter I ask him how much Python experience he has (job lists a requirement of at least 1 year).
He replies "I'm very good at object oriented functional programming".
I ask again "But what is your experience? Did you ever take any courses? Do you have a git repository to show? Any side.."
*he interrupts again* "I only use Matlab!".
Team lead stands up and proceeds to shake his hand while saying "we will get back to you".
At last the guy says with a stupid smile on his face "You better hire me! Call me back tomorrow." Leaves TL hanging and walks away after packing his stuff into the pockets.
I was so shocked that I wasn't even angry.
We both laughed for the rest of the day though. It was probably the weirdest interview I took part at.40 -
Got a phone interview for a backend dev job in an opsec company.
Interviewer:
This is a very serious and prestigious position, we take care of the most important bits of code.
*Proceeds to talk introductory nonsense*
Interviewer:
Do you know what a DNS is?
Me:
Yes, of course! DNS stands for Domain Name System.... Blah blah blah... I explain about the servers, about hosts file, about DNS spoofing and everything else possible on this topic.
Interviewer:
See, I was patient with you - letting you finish. I'm not sure what you're talking about and where you got it from, but a DNS is that line in the browser where you type the site's name.
He didn't ask any more questions, just told me that they'll get back to me. I asked not to do that.
Three weeks later I got an email claiming that I'm not qualified.44 -
A story about how a busy programmer became responsible for training interns.
So I was put in charge of a team of interns and had to teach them to work with Linux, coding (Bash, Python and JS) and networking overall.
None of the interns had any technical experience, skills, knowledge or talent.
Furthermore the task came to me as a surprise and I didn't have any training plan nor the time.
Case 0:
Intern is asked to connect to a VM, see which interfaces there are and bring up the one that's down (eth1). He shuts eth0 down and is immediately disconnected from the machine, being unable to connect remotely.
Case 1:
Intern researches Bash scripting via a weird android app and after a hour or so creates and runs this function: test(){test|test&}
He fork-bombed the VM all other interns used.
Case 2:
All interns used the same VM despite the fact that I created one for each.
They saved the same ssh address in Putty while giving it different names.
Case 3:
After explicitly explaining and demonstrating to the interns how to connect to their own VMs they all connect to the same machine and attempt to create file systems, map them and etc. One intern keeps running "shutdown -r" in order to test the delay flag, which he never even included.
Case 4:
All of the interns still somehow connect to the same VM despite me manually configuring their Putty "favorites". Apparently they copy-paste a dns that one of them sent to the entire team via mail. He also learned about the wall command and keeps scaring his team members with fake warnings. A female intern actually asked me "how does the screen knows what I look like?!". This after she got a wall message telling her to eat less because she gained weight.
Case 5:
The most motivated intern ran "rm -rf" from his /etc directory.
P.S. All other interns got disconnected because they still keep using his VM.
Case 6:
While giving them a presentation about cryptography and explaining how SSH (that they've been using for the past two weeks) works an intern asked "So is this like Gmail?".
I gave him the benefit of the doubt and asked if he meant the authorization process. He replied with a stupid smile "No! I mean that it can send things!".
FML. I have a huge project to finish and have to babysit these art majors who decided to earn "ezy cash many" in hightech.
Adventures will be continued.26 -
I was drunk yesterday, watching Mr. Robot.
Woke up with Kali linux booted from a usb and a hacked WiFi password for my annoying vegan neighbor.33 -
Met a guy in the gym, he asked me to make him an online shop for supplements.
I quickly made a reactive, angular based shop with an admin page.
He paid, I put my name as the creator, it was all good...
...then he removed all legal products and added tons of anabolic steroids for horses in little jars (yes, he even added pro level photos).
I received a call from the police and had to prove that I don't manage his content.16 -
The programmer and the interns part 2.
We will discuss numerous events that happened over the past week or so.
Case 0:
We had our weekly engineering meeting. The interns were invited as well.
We hold meetings in the generic, big, corporate meeting rooms with a huge table in the middle.
There were more than enough chairs for everyone yet the most motivated and awkward intern (let's call him Simon) chose to stand, cause "it's cool man, I always stand". At this point we all know that he probably read about Agile stand up meetings and is confusing it with this one. Otherwise he's simply trying to stand out from the rest. (See what I did there?)
Anyway the meeting has started way later than planned (what a surprise) and took much longer than Simon expected. Everybody is sitting and listening to the CTO while occasionally glancing at the weird looking intern standing awkwardly and refusing to sit because it would make his original intentions pointless. He even tried to nod whith a serious face and his hands crossed when the CTO said something and looked at his general direction. The meeting was about a hour and a half long but with the delay it was at least 2.5 hours.
At the end Simon was so exhausted that he fell asleep on the office puff, was forgotten and locked inside. 3 hours later when I was home I received a call from him with his sleepy-trying-to-sound-awake voice telling the news. Lucky there's a 24/7 Noc team that could rescue him.
Case 1:
An intern who was late on his Linux test connected to every test VM (should I remind you that each one has a personal VM but they share passwords for their roots?) and tried to reset it with "sleep 10s; shutdown -h now".
He took down all 13 of those so I had to turn them on and switch passwords again.
Case 2:
One of the interns didn't do any of his training chores. Apparently he forgot what he was told to use, ignored all online documentation and used Windows CMD with Linux commands for almost a week already.
Case 3:
Simon uses Vim to write all text possible. Even mails, he then selects all and copies into the mail body. He spent half a day on a homework task I gave them. He wrote everything inside one text file using Vim. When he was done he saved the file and quit the editor. He then said "Oh shit! I've forgot to sign my name!". I explicitly told him that theres absolutely no need for that because I see which mail the file was sent from. He said "I don't even need a program for that!" and gave a couple of strokes on the keyboard.
Later I received an email from him with a .txt attachment. When I opened it the only text that was inside was "by Simon ;)".
I logged to his machine and checked the last command ran on the file:
echo "by Simon ;)" > linuxtasks.txt
Case 4:
The girl here uses a MacBook. She keeps getting confused with the terminal windows and rebooting her own machine instead of the remote VM.
Case 5:
Haven't checked yet how this happened but one of the interns deleted the gui from his local Centos.35 -
Today I found out that I could inject HTML into our documentation system.
I quickly tested it with the <style> tag by setting all paragraph tags to have eye bleeding red backgrounds.
Then when seeing that it works I've made a modal that displays a blinking red alert with the headline "Access Denied!", a loading bar that says "Tracing intruder IP..." and another line "Erasing confidential information.. .".
Then I've added an animation to run on all paragraph, heading and list tags - first they bounce and then the become transparent.
Then I asked one of the interns to go to that specific document - one of the longest and most important manuals they have access to.
I then left the room and through a window watched the poor, panicking guy looking into the abyss and "realizing" that he somehow deleted the important files and will be traced down soon.
I had to tell him the truth to avoid a suicide in the office.
It was perfect! I will definitely do this to others! :D12 -
Senior IT engineer enters the room and quietly talks to a coworker about a job related issue.
Another coworker decided to troll the sysadmin.
CW: *yells* "Open a ticket!" (That's the sysadmin's regular reply)
IT: *ignores*
CW: *trying to get his attention* "Open a ticket first! Then come back"
IT: *gives him the stare of death*
CW: "Go away and open a ticket!"
IT: *silently leaves the room*
After no more than a minute CW gets a reject from all networks outside the company's VPN.
IT comes back into the room, get's intimately close to CW's ear and says "Now open a ticket".
👋
🎤9 -
The programmer and the interns part 3.
Many of you asked me to keep posting about the interns that I'm responsible for.
I had the intention but never had the time or the energy. Since the interns only kept doing stupid, unthinkable things and just filtering out the good ones is a task of its own.
Time has passed, some interns left us by their choice, others were fired (for obvious reasons). Some stayed loyal and were given permanent positions. New ones joined. I no longer am directly responsible for their wellbeing, yet, somehow I am still their tech-lead and the developer of their tools.
Without further delay,
Case 0:
New guy get's into the internship, has his LinkedIn title set to ‘HTML Technician’.
Didn’t know about the existence of HTML5.
Been building static web pages in the early 2000s. The kind with embedded, inline CSS.
Claims that he is about to finish an engineering degree (sadly I believe him).
Fails the entry level Linux test. Complains about the similarity of the answer options.
Fails the basic web-standars test because "they change so fast, but the foundation is HTML and it's rock-solid!".
Get's caught taking home onions and milk from the kitchen.
Is spotted eating in a restaurant under our offices in his day off. Thrice. He lives a 30 minute drive away and comes here on a bicycle or by bus.
Apparently didn't know that the scrolling wheel on the mouse is clickable.
Said that his PC experience is mostly from his PlayStation (PC = PlayCtation apparently).
Get's fired, says that he'll go to the press. Never does.
Case 1:
Yet another new intern. He seems very eager to learn and work, capable, even charismatic. Has an impressive CV.
Does nothing.
Learns from the "case 0" guy and spends time with him until he is fired.
Comes to work at 8:00 AM and immediately goes to sleep on an office puff. In front of everyone.
Keeps dining alone, without a notice, at different times, for hours. Sometimes brings food into the office and loudly eats it there.
On his evening shifts keeps disappearing for long periods of time. Apparently drinking in the nearby bars and hitting on girls.
Keeps bragging about his success with getting their numbers and rants about those who reject him.
For over a year he fails his final training test and remains a trainee, without the ability to work on a real case.
Not fired yet.
Case 2:
Company retreat. Beautiful, exotic views, warm sun beams, all inclusive package for everyone on a huge half-island.
Simon (he's still with us, now as a true engineer!) brings his MacBook to the beach in order to work and impress all others.
Everybody get's drunk and start throwing huge inflatable balls at each other. One hits his laptop and it immediately is flattened.
Upset Simon is going in circles and ranting about the situation, looking for a solution.
Loses his phone on the beach.
Takes his broken laptop with him while searching for the phone.
Dips the laptop in the river while drunkenly ducking in order to pick a clam.
Case 3:
Still company retreat.
Drunk intern makes out with an employee's drunk wife.
Huge verbal fight. The husband says that he files for a divorce. Intern get's fired.
Case 4:
Still company retreat.
Three interns each take an inflatable swimming mattress and drift with the current. Get found on the other side of the resort three hours later, with red skin and severely dehydrated.
Case 5:
Still company retreat.
The 'informally fired' intern gets drunk again, climbs through a window into a room and makes out with an employee's drunk wife.
Again, gets caught when the husband returns to find a locked door but can see them though the window.
Case 6:
Still company retreat.
We all get ferociously drunk and wander off to the unknown in search of more booze.
Everybody does something stupid and somebody finds Simon's phone.
Simon is lost.
Frenzied horde of drunks is roaming the half-island in search of ethanol and the lost comrade.
Simon's phone get's permanently lost.
Five people step on sea urchins but find that out only hours later and then are unable to walk.
The mob, now including more drunk people who joined voluntarily, finds the sexually active intern making out with the enraged employee's wife yet again.
Surprisingly Simon is found sleeping in a room nearby.22 -
Let's quickly talk about idiots.
> A simpleton coworker of mine installed Ubuntu on his brand new ThinkPad with a touch screen.
> Asks me to show him the Linux games site I mentioned earlier.
> I see that he has no browser installed.
No Firefox, Chromium, Epiphany, etc.
> Now I know that he has a room temperature IQ and something moronic is going to happen.
Truth be said, I subliminally desired a terminal based browser.
> Then he fucking opens Wine and I shit you NOT! That thundercunt opens...
> Internet Explorer!
> I punched his screen.
> No longer a touch-screen laptop.20 -
Lamer rant
For a really long time I said to myself that this is too basic to rant about but lately it became so frequent and extreme that here is my rant about completely clueless users that ask me IT related questions.
Disclaimer: Said users are people that I generally can't avoid. Distant family members, neighbors and etc.
Case 0:
U: I don't know what's happening!! The computer doesn't work!!
M: What do you mean?
U: There's no Facebook! And everything is stuck and no messenger!!!
M: The WiFi on your laptop was off. I turned it on. Still, this doesn't mean that the pc wasn't working.
U: I don't understand this shit!!!
Case 1:
U: I hate this computer!!! It never works!!! Help meeee!!!
M: What now?
U: Where did the internet disappear?!
M: (assuming it's wifi or browser related)
Actually user moved the Chrome window to bottom-right corner and lost it.
Every time I try to show the user how I resolve the issue the user yells that there are too many steps, that they are complicated and that I'm a bad teacher and doing it too fast.
Case 2:
U: My computer is so slow! It barely can load google translate! And I can't listen to music on youtube!! Shitty laptop! It's you! Your computers in the apartment drain everything!!!
M: You have no idea what you are talking about.
U: My husband told me that your computers are heavy and drain everything!
M: What exactly did he tell you that my devices drain?
U: I don't know! All the energy! I believe him! He knows!
M: My computers drain less electricity than your vacuum and I have a separate internet connection. Not only we share nothing but also I drain nothing.
U: Since you appeared all the computers are slow!!!!
Fkk...
Case 3:
U: I don't understand, where is my whatsapp?
M: You can't locate the app on your phone?
U: Yes! F*ck, help me! I'm so angry and I really need this NOW!!!
M: Shut up. I'm already here and helping.
(I open users phone and whatsapp is the active app...)
U: I can' t find my whatsapp with Clara!
F*ck you! F*ck you! Ghckjfshij!!!
Case 4:
(crazy hitting on my door)
U: I don't have THE internet!!!
It's you again! You took all of THE internet!!!
M: No, it doesn't work like that. Your provider is bad, your package is cheap and your cables are of low quality.
U: I need THE internet immediately!!! Stop playing with your typing and fix the facebook or I'll cut the power cables to the house!!
I can go on, just don't think that recalling all those events is healthy for me.20 -
The CEO at the company I work at has been telling our partners that our PIA is ready. It took me a week to figure out what the hell a PIA was but he actually meant API6
-
Every time I code, my programmer boyfriend has to be near me. Why, you may ask? Because this happens too often:
me: *yells bf name*, why does this not work?????
bf: here, lemme see
*code mysteriously works when bf comes to see*
bf: what, theres nothing wrong with that
me:
15 -
Programmer boyfriend says he misses me, wants to talk to me and wants us to video call.
He codes on camera instead of talking with me. 😂10 -
We have a customer that runs an extremely strict security program, which disallows any type of outside connection to their servers.
In order to even correspond with them via email you must undergo background checks and be validated. Then you sign an NDA and another "secrecy level" contract.
Today they had a problem, I was the one assigned to fix it. I asked for a screenshot.
We already use an encrypted mail service, which runs via a special VPN that has enough layers of protection to slow down a photon to the speed of a snail.
The customer's sysadmin encrypted the screenshot and sent it to me.
I open the screenshot and....
He runs Windows 10, uses Google Chrome and has Facebook's WhatsApp desktop app flashing orange in the tray.
😐😣😫😖4 -
Hello, guys.
I'm here is new. I'm from Russia. Sorry for my English, but i will learn his and talk you all about think.45 -
Today I asked my client to do "ctrl+f5" to empty browser cache he literally did "ctrl+f+5" and said "it did nothing"7
-
Saw a guy asking on LinkedIn for PHP frameworks. He was currently using notepad++ as framework.
Say what... 🤓13 -
Was asked to check the sales team server as it was running slow.
Apart from redundant processes and users with too much permissions I found a "Cobol" folder under one of the sales team member's home folder.
If it weren't the sales people I would immediately disregard this as trolling but with them it's quite possible that this is a real attempt to learn programming...
...most likely from the facebook ads with the hooded guys that offer to teach you to code in 10 days for $800.
7 -
A recruiter called today.
A new job proposal. Higher salary, manage some 5 men team, DevOps buzzwords, cool product, great conditions but then she says "and we're working only in Windows environment".
My ears ringed "only in windows env".. "only windows"... "windooowwssss".
"Nope, thanks, have a good day!" - hung up.19 -
Had a heated argument on whether HTML’s a fuckin programming language or not and he claims to have 8 years experience...
Fuck bro, that dense? Everyone knows its a fuckin markup language27 -
Some of you might have seen it already, those who didn't just have to.
One of the best rants I've read lately.
"Our security auditor is an idiot. How do I give him the information he wants?"
https://serverfault.com/questions/...5 -
Friend pays over $50 a month for Codecademy Pro, and claims it's the best. Then he writes code like this and thinks nothing's wrong.
And this isn't even his worst...
11 -
Today I learnt that my LG Nexus 5X uses a Samsung manufactured DRAM :O
I had no idea that several Google and Apple devices use Samsung manufactured RAM chips!
PS - Don't judge me, I'm a hardware noob.
17 -
-made a password-protected zip to backup my homedir
-launch the update to Fedora 28
-oh look Jessica Jones season 2 is available on Netflix
...
Some hours later
-Fedora 28 boots
-copy back my backup.zip
-shit what's the password already
-proceed to bruteforce the zip
-let's go back to Netflix while it's doing the job
...
Some hours later
-password: test
-proceed to self-fuck4 -
Laziest dev thing I've ever done.
An annoying "I-do-nothing-but-delegate-and-make-fuzz" manager proposed to create a new application with redundant functionalities, that would take me at least half a year to build.
Practically, the app would never be used and I didn't want to put effort in that monstrosity.
So, naturally I...
Pressure the right people, schedule numerous meetings, become the project manager for all internal applications and... I cancel the project.4 -
With time, I have come to the realisation that when a person says he knows C++. He's either a noob or god!3
-
...
Me: Oh cool, So you do dynamic websites
Him: Yes,
Me: Oh Great, What programming language do you use?
Him: Oh huu, I use Sublime Text...
Sorry, I didn't heard the rest cause I was dead2 -
When you type chmod 777 / instead of chmod 777 ./ on an AWS EC2 instance and have to unmount the volume attach it to a new instance reconfigure the permissions unmount it and connect it back to the original instance :)5
-
Coworker was told to shift code from private repo into company repo. She literally copy pasted all the files into the other repo. 😁👍6
-
Finally got my Hackintosh working. Took me fuckin 3 days to figure out how to get the sound working lmao
29 -
I was assigned a ticket which was about a drop down menu which was not aligning properly.
Turns out the drop-down was positioned absolutely and my co-worker (read bestie) had written media query for every 10 pixels to match the position for mobile and desktop devices (from 320px to 1040px and beyond ~150 lines for a drop-down). No one noticed any flaw for few weeks until one of the QA had to check the site in landscape mode on mobile device.
I replaced it with 4 lines of JavaScript.4 -
I am a New student in a programming school. Haven't coded enything ever. Use 1 week to make html, css and JavaScript website from scartch. *Happy for my achivement* curent teacher comes to review my work. Tells me it's shit. Teacher uses only ready maid templates... Fuuuuuu9
-
When I was still a noob programmer, I was working on a website for a big client. We had a demo coming up in big city. So we drove there several hours and went to their office. All the management board and shareholders and what not were there.
So we started the demo. Everything had worked perfect the night before. But on that day, we were right away greeted with some stupid PHP error right there on the first page. Had to fix it quickly so we could continue with the demo, so I logged into their production server with SSH and started fixing the code with vim. I was connected to the projector, so my horrid noob code with cringy joke comments was there for everyone in the room to see.
Eventually got it working, but I saw several people in the room facepalming hard. Can't ever forget the day. :D1 -
I'm working in a blockchain company for $180 as a junior programmer and there is a mid-senior guy who get ~8 times more than me. So we got a project to make a backend API with its tests. When I was partly completed my part of the project I asked that "mid-senior" to share his code with me. Nothing was done, and he asked me to push my changes to git so he could start to do something (view at my code and start copying). BUT. He couldn't even pull from git. He couldn't use that fucking Visual studio's team explorer and even the solution explorer. Ok, he was working with VS for the first time, but I did too. I cloned the repo gave him the environment to start "working" and get back to my work. After that nothing changed, he was writing each one-lined if block for half hour and the code was very dirty. Finally I've got his laptop and started to writing his part by teaching him all the programming. You may say I'm mad. I really do, I think that I did all project. This is sad... How can people get this much by being this far from the programming? We need really high quality programmers.3
-
You are all invited to the SPI-Party!!!!
*crying.... this is not my job, i am less than a noob around here 😭😭*
12 -
Once I've worked in a start-up located in an engineering university "incubator", so we had a lot of engineer-to-be students applying for part-time jobs.
One of these kids was hired by my boss who labeled him "highly technical, very skilled in IT".
One day, while very busy with my own upcoming release, I had to help him finding a bug in his (horrible) code.
Me: Oh, that's easy, you need to load the image from the parent directory
Guy: ...
Me: You know how to do this, right? You're 1 exam away from being a computer engineer
Guy: ...
Me: Ok, ok, don't worry. Just type "../" right before the path
The guy starts typing, literally, "dotdotslash" into the path.
I immediately stopped him, almost crying. Then, I asked him to go for a walk.
"Don't mind about your bug, I'll take care"3 -
OK.
1. So i tindered.
2. I got a really nice girl.
3. We chatted really long and good.
4. We tried to meetup it did not work because of our schedule. New
job on my end, she is a student.
5. I thought its over. Fine whatever.
6. She gives me her number.
7. We continue chat on whatsapp
8. Blablabla 3 days long, she gets bored and tries to friendzone me
9. I revert the shit and state i wanna be serious and there wont be a
friendzone/nice guy comin from me.
10. She happy and continues to chat.
11. I get emtionally invested in her.
12. We exchange thoughts dreams and music.
13 We want to meetup at weekend. I cant. Got a family wedding all
weekend.
14. We want to meetup the second week.
I cant. Im off on a company trip. Again new job here.
15. So we say in the week after I get back.
15a. Before the weekend we need to deliver an rc and go all out to hold
the deadline.
15b. We deliver, but shit happens on the customer side. His fault but we
get the blame.
15c I go onto the company trip.
16. We chat and i send her pictures of the trip over the weekend so she
sees I care.
17. She seems fine. And happy.
18. I come back from the trip late night and need to work the next day
jetlag style.
19. I work jetlag style. And try to fix the shit from last week.
20. I come home really tired and looking forward to date day tomorrow.
21. I cant do anything. My home looks like shit and the bag still
unpacked. I just eat and fall asleep.
I feel bad bcs my home will turn her down instantly if we make it to my
place.
Need to hope that it does not come to this.
22. Date day comes. Today.
23. I wake up at 6 early to plan ahead to make sure my clothes are fine
and i arrive on time in the office to exit early.
24. I expect to check what goes on today in the city and give her the
location to meet and time.
25. I enter office and immeadetly get caught up in meeting planning, dev
questions and the meeting itself because the project is on edge.
26. We have a 5hours long meeting where people go on and on and on.
27. 3h later in the meeting:
my brain was fried and around 12 i go to lunch with some people.
28. Meanwhile the city is turning into a rainy mess of a shitty day. No
way I can have a nice walk with her like that. Bars and coffeshops are
just to boring.
29. So i eat to regain some sense and we go back to the office.
Meanwhile I am thinking all kinds of locations and stuff in my head.
30. Havent given her any update since a good morning in the morning.
31. We reenter the meeting. Things continue like before. The project is
on impossible demands and impossible timelines. Still we try to do our
best.
32 3h later on 3pm I tell her i am in a long meeting and working on a
meetingspot.
33. shes not happy.
34. I get a call from a relative
35. i need to go out and take the call. not good for the collegues.
again new job here.
36. family trouble, money trouble, goverment demands. I promise to
handle that tomorrow. Before work.
37. i get back into the meeting.
38. still super slow and no results.
39. need to focus but start to check for locations on my phone.
40. she asks me where i am
41. I send her my location.
42. she thinks i am saying she should pick me up!
43 i joke and say no definitly not.
44. shes pissed.
45. I decide for a coffeeshop. after work. and send her the location
46. She says to call it off.
47. I go all in and go romance style. I say ill wait there even if she
does not come to show her how much i care.
U know to avoid the lets do it some other time fuckery and then it never
happens.
47. She goes quiet.
48. 2h later we finish the meeting. Meanwhile QA foudn a bug we need to
fix because why not.
49. I got 30 minutes to find the bug and fix it before I need to go to
uphold my word.
50. I find out what to do, but it might break a lot of other things
without careful test and implementation. Collegues says he takes it.
51 I feel bad but I need to go. I even leave earlier because otherwise I
would not be on time.
52. I arrive 15 minutes early. I grab two coffee2go and wait outside,
53. Shitty weather, sometimes rain, sometimes sunny, cant decide what it
wants.
54. The weather is just like how I feel.
55. I wait 1 1/2h
56. I think I should feel stupid, For gods sake its tinder. People dont
give a crap, Enough people around why should I Invest so much into this?
But I dont feel stupid. Because this is how I want it. I dont want
appointments, I dont want safety. I decided for her and I went all in.
57. I send her pics from the sceneray as proof that I waited,
58. I think I blew it. She is still quiet.
59. Friends are asking me for plans for the weekend. I wish I could say
I already have some with her.
60. I feel lost right now. But my head says I put too much stress on
her, And i fucked up with the planning. I should have been more precise.
My head also says that i am putting myself into the victim role, which
is wrong always. Should I continue to reach out to her? Is there
something I could do still?39 -
Hi, I'm new to devRant. That's perfect because I love to rant about everything.
So, let this be my first rant:
Apache Velocity + last minute rush + heatwave - climatisation = Hello Migraine my old friend...15 -
**noob alert**
Hi all, I'm new to this community. I found it out couple of days back while downloading some apps on play store. And I don't know how much time have I spent here since then... Damm, I've an interview after 2 days.
My query is, I am stuck/confused. I have so many ToDos. ToDos to learn new things, from UI to other langs to machine learning to database to etc etc. And I keep on postponing it because I can't decide which way to go first. There is so much fuzz about BigData/AI which sounds cool. Sometimes I want to build UI for my imaginary idea, then somebody says a man must learn linux and DB. Top of that I'm preparing for interviews, so I think I should get a job first and then start learning. But when I get a job, I get *busy* with job. It feels like Captain America, all he does is official work. I sometimes feel like trying open source coding, but quit the idea because I get scared or overwhelmed by imagining the big community behind it and I won't be able to make a difference or I might get bashed by others as I get bashed in StackOverFlow :-(
I'm unable to get help from friends/family/colleagues, not because they are bad. It's just they don't get it. People think just because you have a job which pays the bills and save money, everything is fine because there are lots of people who dream to get a job, so be thankful for what you have. I'm thankful... But it's not helping. I really want to do things more than what my job asks me to. The kid inside me is awake since I became adult.
Have you been in this condition or is it just me? Or is it too confusing? Could you please help me out. Thanks a lot. Sorry for serious post. I'm a java programmer by the way.9 -
The only reason I browse incognito is because I don't want Google to mess up my search results. Otherwise I don't care about my browsing history. Anybody else does it for the same reason?4
-
The down sides of living in a third world country, the prices of things { especially electronics } are so damn expensive. I love my country and all but hey this is really unaffordable.
To give you an idea, I work for 40 hours a week, four weeks a month and earn around 25,000 rupees.
Sometimes I just watch videos on YouTube of people building things and feel happy for them.
14 -
Manager: a person who thinks changing the whole logic of the app only takes 30 sec, but changing the site header should take 5 hour!1
-
noob misconception #527: during my first hackathon i didn't know what version control was (i thought github was this magical elite hacker tool), so id copy my code into a google doc every few minutes along with a timestamp 😫6
-
planned a project,
spent a whole day on a feature.
3 weeks later, i realise that feature i spent a whole day on wasn't needed at all.
i'm a fucking noob ape trying to pretend it's a developer or some shit.3 -
!rant
Joined a couple hours ago. Really excited to be here, I'm not usually the social type (fb, twitter, etc) but this looks like a place that will be able to understand my frustrations !2 -
Just wasted a ton of time trying to figure out why my circuit wouldnt work properly and then noticed...
2 -
I was part of a on-call rotation. We had ~800 microsites with decent traffic on this one box, because that's a good idea...
One day the box was experiencing kernel panics and causing core dumps. After exhausting every possiblity I decided it was time to restart the box:
sudo shutdown now
Missed the -r and the box was not accessible remotely. Had to wait for someone at the data center to terminal in.
Downtime was ~2 hours.
This was caused by a crontab that automatically ran apt-get update & apt-get upgrade... Also made by me... None of this should have worked or allowed to be done! -
Might be nothing for others, but I finally published my Vue website with the following setup:
1. Vue inside docker
2. Nodejs API inside docker
3. MongoDB inside docker
4. Nginx as reverse proxy
5. Let's Encrypt
6. NO I WILL NOT SHARE THE LINK, don't want to be hacked lol and it is for personal use only.
But I'd love to thank devRant members who have helped me reach this point, two months ago I was a complete noob in Vue and a beginner in NodeJs services, now I have my own todo website customized for my needs.
Thank you :)
27 -
A friend of mine who works in tech support at a college gets this call. The guy on the other end (a college professor) asks how to open an application on his computer.
Tech Support: "There should be an icon on your desktop."
He then hears this strange rustling noise over the phone.....
Tech Support: "What are you doing?"
Professor: "You said to look on my desktop."
Tech Support: "Ummm, hang on. I'll be there in a few minutes."1 -
So I was reviewing my old code. Refactoring and improving the documentation.
This is a production app that is being used 24/7/365.
I see myself using "bar = foo" and there's even an explanation of what it does.
Apparently I resolved a relatively difficult Date object issue and had to use temporary variables.
Didn't know how to call them and ended up with these jewels.3 -
Set up a server, code for hours using node and Mongo trying to realize your dream. FINALLY complete it after a lOOOng time of blood and sweat..
Then find out that a Noob who didn't know the first letter of web programming used FireBase and did what you did in a fraction of the time
I think I've reached the point where I can question what I've done, my purpose in life and.. As for my confidence I think it successfully descended during my last visit to the bathroom3 -
Top 3 times:
1) When I amazed myself by solving a problem using recursion.
2) When I taught myself how to make my a restful api and consumed it using Ajax.
3) When I converted a psd in to a responsive pixel perfect webpage.
Writing code makes me feel I am worth something in this world.1 -
Hello (World)! Noob here. I installed devRant around 5 days ago. I just keep reading the rants and didn't created my account because i was not sure if i will stay here for long time coz most (cr-)apps are boring.
After 5 days:
I owe all of you a tons of '++'.
I want a boss like @Linux have. (i know tags work only in comments)
Gonna stay here till i stay in IT industry.(maybe)10 -
Swithced to Ubuntu, this is my first ever OS outside of windows. Man I am loving this shit.
Bought my laptop with windows 8, was working like charm and then came windows 10, I updated it and it was working fine untill they started releasing the patch updates. My laptop became slow as fuck, taking forever to boot and bitch was I afraid to connect to my wifi fearing the background data consumption and the antivirus clogging the ram.
I am free now, I am finally free. I am ready suck the developer's dick just to please him for this masterpiece and helping me get out of this misery.21 -
Today was not a good day for me at all ,being considered a junior developer is not a good thing.
Yes I know due to my lack of the understanding of your 3 years old code base I could not meet up with the deadlines.
So as a punishment one of our senior devs asked me to bring my chair to his desk and told me to commit and push my progress every ten minutes .
He'll then review reading each code line by line ., Reverting too.
The worst part was that for the ten minutes I'll need to wait another 5 , because he was watching some Fifa19 gameplays on YouTube.
This went on for 3 hours .
It worked because I feel like a title noob today .8 -
1) That loud ass mother fucker sitting besides me, shut the fuck up.
2) Air motherfucking condition turned all the way to the max makes me horny and want to fuck your motherboard.
3) Illiterate assholes writing code without any comments and half assed function name just to look cool when we approach them for doubts.
4) Onsite motherfuckers enjoying their lives, taking photos of it and posting it in a monthly magazine while we s(h)it behind the fucking systems all day.
Thank-fucking-you, y'all can die suffocating in your own smelly dierraea poop.8 -
What music do you listen to when you code? Also, can you please recommend some. Music with minimal to no wording is what interests me. Any suggestions would be appreciated:)41
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Any other noob coder here trying to gain the mindset of the pros, enjoy the environment although he doesn't get half the jokes and rants, and trying to fake it till he make it? (:^/)17
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Having been messing around with packet sniffers and sending packets. I wanted to make one myself. After a few hours searching, copy pasting, writing, debugging and running.
All of a sudden I hear my dad screaming asking if I still had Internet. Then, after resetting the router, he started to call our telecom provider, who had no idea what was going on.
Lesson learned; do pass along the intercepted packets or else it is interruption.
Noone ever knew.4 -
So this just happened,
Me and my co-worker (we are junior developers) were working on the same bug, it was a post call throwing a server exception.
We had asked for help to debug this issue from a senior developer the day before, he was quite busy with his own tasks.
He is one those kinds who would keep working even if the entire bay is wasting their time, always keeping to himself, needless to say I haven't seen him smile.
Back to my story, he couldn't spare time yesterday so we tried to squash the bug ourselves thinking he might have forgotten we had called him.He then comes out of nowhere, he firsr checks the button bindings, params sent and the call being made.
He then went through the backend code strategically placing the break points, clicks and debugs a few times and then opens the console. BAM!!!!
" D' hell yo !!" Shows up in the console, not just once but multiple times. Turns out I forgot the logger I had placed in the catch block.
He turns to me in super slo-mo looks me in the eye and whispers "what the hell yo!" and kept quite for some time, meanwhile the sense of cringe was slowly creeping on me. That was when he let out a loud blurt and the entire cabin turned to us. Needless to say it was awkward.
His smile was creepy though :/ -
A little Backstory to this:
So I was a new intern in this company I started working at. It was about 4 months ago, that I started there. Before going to that company I only had very basic knowledge of HTML, CSS and Python. They gave me a virtual server I could tinker around on and they gave me some tasks like build a Hangman-game, build a quiz and so on. I learned a lpt with these things.
So lets get to the fun part: one day I was doing a little programming on my virtual server and I thought to myself "lets add a cool hovering feature to my buttons"... Well I was a big time n00b and I obviously didnt think about using the :hover from css. So I started coding the hover feature with JavaScript and it was really hard for me. I coded like 5 hours for that hover feature and it still didnt work. So I asked a colleague and he was kind enough to show me that css :hover feature that I could have used... And I started laughing and felt super dumb :D I made the most complicated thing out of the easiest thing there is. But oh well I learned something new I guess.
Try to think simple guys!1 -
Godmotherfuckingshitpissballs fuck software development. Seriously wtf.
I learned c# and Unity for 4 fuckin years. Now I want to learn Electron and i just cant get it to fuckin work that motherfucker!
Installed node.js into a folder on my Desktop, git cloned the quick start app, copied the files, npm start and wow it starts.
ONCE.
It does not start anymore wtf? Also the stupid tutorials that I bought dont fuckin explain how to set it up properly wtf...
Doesnt help that im a windows noob and the guy in the tutorial is a macSnob.
Goddamnit I hate this phase of learning stuff. It fuckin sucks.
Also software development is around for like what? 30 years and electron is the best solution for GUI that people came up with? Fuck me.32 -
Got a mini project assignment in college. We decided to make a game using Unity that recgonizes sign language gestures from Leap Motion.
I asked my colleague to make the function to compare the hand gesture, and I'll do the rest of the game. One more friend does the documentations and reports.
Three weeks passed, asked for the code but he said he hasn't finished it yet. I told him to ask me if he has any problems with it.
He sent me this 24 hrs before the deadline.
Me and my other friend died on the spot.
I screamed at him the whole night on the phone call whilsth trying to do his part in just 3 hours...
Needless to say, we didn't finish the project on time.
-
Everytime I wanna create custom adapters and custom listviews I have to go through tutorials again -_-4
-
A guy came to me with a laptop that wouldn't boot. After some poking around, I opened the machine just to find everything submerged in coffee. No sh*t your computer doesn't work..3
-
I can't believe it took me about 17 years to accidently press the back button on the mouse (mouse button 4?) when Visual Studio had focus. Apparently you can go back to the previous code file by using the back button...4
-
The more I learn about programming the more terrified I become about having huge knowledge gaps and learning something wrong by possibly making wrong assumptions about how certain things work or by falling on bad tutorials. I'm constantly hyped about coding, and at the same time I always feel I will never be able to say confidently "I know how to code".
How the hell do you make sure you are learning programming correctly as a self taught? Or do i just have to accept that no matter how and what I code there will always be a better way to do it, resulting in me constantly feeling as a low-skilled coder?4 -
Duck duck go CEO's take on why to use their search engine and not google.
https://quora.com/Why-should-I-use-...6 -
I got my first computer when I was in 3rd grade. I don't know yet how to search for web pages. What I would do is take a keyword/topic and prepend "http://www" and append ".com" to it.
So if I wanted to search for games I would type "http://www.games.com" on the URL.
Sometimes it works, most of the time I land on some familiar 'buy this domain' web page -
I want to get in the habit of proper documentation of my code, But i'm not sure how it's formatted, how it should look or how I should even begin writing documentation? Do I open a document and just take snap shots of my code and explain how it works? I'm a little confused. Do I take pictures of my UI and explain how to use it? Is it like writing a book?
5 -
!rant
User: "Hello, I'd like to hear a torrent joke."
Tracker: "I will refer you to people who can tell you a torrent joke."
Peer 1: "Why d"
Peer 2: "cken "
Peer 3: "road?"
Peer 4: "id th"
Peer 3: "cross"
Peer 1: "e chi"
Peer 5: " the "
Peer 2: "the o"
Peer 4: "To ge"
Peer 1: "side."
Peer 5: "ther"
Peer 2: "t to " -
I wish I can say that I'm a full-stack developer... too bad all I can say is I'm a fully developed stack of fat 😂
-
The new software to log in working time at my workplace requires Silverlight. I'm on Ubuntu. Basically after weeks of googling and trying different solutions, I decided that the easiest way to make it work was to install a virtual machine running Windows.
Right now I'm just trying to understand if there is some obscure reason for which they used Silverlight or if I'm just a complete noob who doesn't know jack.10 -
My code be like:
Call the method cronk...
WROOOONG MEEETTTTTTTHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDD!!!
*climbs out of alligator pit*
Why do we even have that method -
(Dev)Life in the past 12 hours
Oh boy have the last 12 hours been a roller coaster ride for me. Noob me decided to "compile" AoSP for my device to get a taste of how custom ROMs are built from source. Overall it was fun but the errors were a very good excercise for googling, SO. Couple stuff I learnt ( possibly useful for anyone who comes here )
* The shebang line ( #!/usr/bin/env python ) on my system translated to Python 3.7 environment instead of the expected Python 2.7. Best solution I think to avoid confusion is to create a python 2.7 environment and source it.
* Get your trees right. A jar file called WfdCommon.jar ( apparently known as wifi-display common ) was the cause of several hours of hunting the fault. My vendor tree somehow didn't have this file so dex2oat was borking out like mad. I'm still amazed how I figured this one out almost by myself. ( Basically I had to check every file included in the boot class path, and find the odd one )
* I wasted a lot of time in finding the right files to change version numbers and all. Maybe I didn't search XDA properly for a guide ?
Overall it was a fun experience. Also if anyone's experienced in this area could you share resources to learn more about custom ROM development? Specifically on the tweaking part where you mix features from different ROMs to make a great ROM ( like AoSP extended or Pixel Experience ). All I could find were on the zips and not on sources.
9 -
As a dev fresh out of college, it's going to be awesome when I start to understand some of the high level jokes on here.3
-
dumb question...
what fun things can you do with a router running linux arm7 with telnet accsess?
apt is not installed, cURL and rpm is.
and sudo doesn't seem to work, but su.8 -
Stuck in tutorial hell....
I have a list of ideas for applications I want to create but I always feel like I never know enough to start them. So I end up signing up for another tutorial from most of the popular sites to only skip pass all 50-60%. Has anyone ever experienced this? I'm open for suggestions to get pass this!!15 -
[serious] I'm a Windows guy. Been so my whole life. devRant community, I'd like to start playing around with Linux. As someone who has never done that before, where should I start? We're talking total noob. Thanks in advance.8
-
WARNING: I am a n00b at this crypto shit!
I've decided I might dable in cryptocurrency mining for a little and see what comes of it but have no clue how to start... Can someone point me in the direction of anything that could be helpful?27 -
New to programming but I want to create my portfolio, any tips? Where should I host it? WordPress is good for this or better write whole code?10
-
* wakes up fresh & excited *
To Myself: Will code like a pro all day 😎
* End of the day (Finally) *
Lets compile 😋
Errors: 37 Warning:8 [-_-!]
* Goes to bed & sleeps forever * 🤐
#Noob_alert 😂 -
A junior came to me and said.. 'We don't need to use flexbox, coz I found a hack using float with percentage, it's more easy to understand and readable.'
Wtf2 -
Am I the only one who frequently forgets to hit the insert key again when I'm done with it and then go and accidentally overwrite some other stuff unintentionally?
4 -
You know that feeling when the junior programmers do their job quickly, properly, and elegantly just like how you would have done it? :)
Yeeeeah, me neither. What the fuck is this dog shit?? God dammit! Why we have 2MB of CSS?? Do you even you this jQuery plugin?? What do you mean frontend.php and frontend2.php?? Why is this block of code indented all the way to the right?? "Just 1 bug left" OH REAAAAALLLYYYYY?4 -
Something isn't working, I play around with the code, and try all possible things in the code. Still it doesn't work. Spend a couple of hours reading each and every line but still in vain. Finally, I find out that I was editing the wrong file (same file at another location) the whole time!! This happened a couple of times when I was a newbie, one of my most annoying mistakes.
Lesson learnt: Now when anybody asks me to debug his code, I first edit/add a print statement to make sure this is the correct file. I thought I was being skeptical, but it has saved me a lot of time (mostly interns do this rookie mistake).2 -
!rant,
please bare with me :)
What is the difference between having a VPS with OpenVPN and connecting to it and between registering for a VPN provider?10 -
How did you start learning to program? I've been teaching myself where ever I can and changed my major, but I feel like I could be learning more in less time. Any tips?10
-
I had a CS teacher in college who was constantly learning and testing himself in order to catch up. He was also my favourite teacher ever. Coincidence? I think not.
-
I regret moving to backend. I loved the days when I used to write lines of code and refresh my browser for the changes to be displayed on the screen. I loved seeing the output of my code, the code flow, the light weight text editor, the visual satisfaction and the chrome debugger.
Now I am fucked up, I am working on creating microservices for restful api. I am hating everything about it. The fact that I should compile the entire war, manually copy them to a webapp folder, restart my tomcat and wait for 5 minutes just to see my code, and the text editors are just a pain in the ass, the debugger sucks too.
I was so looking forward to being a backend Dev because I thought Java was cool and I also was fedup with cross browser optimizations on the front end. Now I would gladly write a streaming service foe ie6. Spring has fucked me up so hard
God save me from this mess.6 -
Sooooo... I've felt a bit lost during my years as a student and maybe this is a nice place to finally talk about it.
I've had my first programming experiences in school (back then it was delphi, a Pascal variant), then decided after graduating I want to study computer science. I've stuck with it and will finish my masters degree in a few months. (Took me a year longer than the university plans but will likely have a very good grade)
Since i have little programming experience and never coded anything useful (mostly study projects or simple programming tasks) I've always been struggling with depressions, worries of being not good enough and never finding a job etc pp, but in the last few months it got worse since I NEED to apply for jobs now as i graduate next may. I'd really like to improve and found some "learn how to code" websites but the progress seems still slow and meaningless when I compare myself to all those guys out there:
- those comparing several hardware/software pieces casually since they know all the (dis)advantages and specs off by heart
- those who have fierce discussions about languages, libraries, runtimes etc
- those who solve the problems in coding websites with 3 lines and incredibly mathematicsl proofs for why this shortcut works (fastest)
- basically the guys who discuss so many things i've never even heard of
I just feel so lost, useless and like i missed years of learning things everybody else just obviously knows now. Is there any way to catch up? I thought about trying to join a local Chaos Computer Club but they sound like they wouldn't be fond of a noob like me.6 -
Positive reviews are ok.
Compliments are weird.
I love receiving good reviews on my software.
(negative but constructive feedback is welcome as well, of course)
But receiving compliments, especially in person is really weird.
On the one hand I know that I did a good job, I know that the features are useful and the UI is classy and comfortable. On the other hand I still feel not comfortable receiving compliments for doing something good.
I don't have any social awkwardness and yet this feels so weird.
Am I alone at this?1 -
I gotta say I hate and I love the part where I have no idea what I'm doing.
Sometimes it's the last time for that action -
Look who is here!!
First of all, when was it ever stable and I can bet nightmare for front end developer has just begun.
5 -
People hear talking about shit like "*high level stuff* SUCKS. YOU *big tech company* FUCKTARD." And I'm just here trying to graduate without failing a CS course because my teachers want me to mug up the code and not understand it! Needless to say, I don't mug up but it's just so fucking irritating when people in your class are mugging up the code and definitions like it's Redbull and scoring stellar grades. FUCK THIS SHIT!4
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I'm not any kind of developer (yet), but I'm learning and this awesome site realy helped me to understand more about this industry from inside and I want to do this even more than before! =D1
-
Anyone ever wondered how hard it is to fill feedbacks and performance growth of your own, which the manager will be evaluating..
The situation is so ironic.. u want to write the best about you, but don't want to look like bragging abt yourself in the same time..4 -
As an interviewer or a senior software engineer who would want to hire someone new to your team, would you expect a person with a solid grasp of algorithms or a person who has good experience in the stack you are using? If both, what would be your priority?10
-
Machine learning?
Maybe just maybe you could ask the user what he wants?
Or is the ML logic something like.
if(last_alert.status == unread)
user = uninterested;
else
user = interested;
-
My biggest fear is once I start to learn another programming language is ill confuse it with the one I already know or have to unlearn habits that work well in my "native" language and it will be hard to go back. How do you guys do it?7
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Note to self: Always do a dry run first when you have --delete-before using rsync.
Long story short I wanted to restore some folders from my external HDD to the home directory on my laptop XD I should have specified the exact folders 😹2 -
some days are very frustrating , i had a task today in which client want a page where he can add bulk of car details on the same page.
now jquery fucked me.
I want to do something to release stress. Why do I get stuck at shitty problems sometimes ?
Damn I'm a noob programmer4 -
My 2tb portable external hard disk is messed up :( . The disk isn't spinning. It is under warranty but I am so depressed.4
-
Light Ide:- GRHH!! M hurt! M hurt! My life is nothing...M a noob...
Dark ide:- woaahh!! Pleasant! M a pro coder
4 -
Just completed my first real project (3 days ago)!
It encrypts given password for your email and save to a file which can decrypted later!
It was my first proj so plz dnt start attacking like stackoverflow's duplicate army !
P.s i am noob so go easy on me if u are goin to suggest me some projects.5 -
Getting started with MEAN stack(finally) after lot of thinking (and a year of android dev). Wish me luck and provide your inputs about my decision.8
-
in my first days of codeblocks, I pressed the 'run' button insted of 'BUILD and run' ....I always got a hello world.
-
Vocabulary for the day.
Screed - An abusive rant is called a Screed.
Usage - I'mma screed the shit outta dem pathetic species of blood sucking parasites AKA dickhead project managers who do dem (developerEstimatedTime/2) quick maths.
Fuck you1 -
Including jQuery everywhere even if the size of my code is lesser than size of the plug-in itself.1
-
Took a day off and came back to find my team and I were moved from frontend to backend (which I always wanted to be).
Manager says we get to learn Java, Mongodb and even Hadoop.
I am so so excited.
But the only little hold back is, there is limited support for Java in sublime text and I should instead use eclipse. I had dozens of shortcuts customised with all those beautiful themes in sublime, but eclipse takes the fun out of coding(no offense to eclipse lovers).5 -
Hi there everybody! Just joined the community, an aspiring Java developer (just started learning a few months ago so I am nowhere near calling myself a "Developer"). I'm committed to becoming a developer, and I am trying to join every community and every conversation out there possible to immerse myself as much as I can. Any advice, guidance, people/conversations here to look out for, anything that will help me in my Journey would be greatly appreciated!9
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last week i finished writing my first Python 3 script, I knew nothing I read no tutorials I just searched for the functions I needed in the docs. it's a script for a game I play to automatically download and run the maps based on a id I put in a text file might add it on GitHub later to get some comments.
-
!rant
I decided to dive into programming by learning C#. Main reason behind it was to avoid the zillions of frameworks and technologies (which scare me) and most importantly dumb client requests. I already have a lot of xp as a designer and working for the web bizz was just UGH!
Nevertheless, I am still wondering if I should pick up some web technologies. I am planning to pick up .NET and C# design patterns next, but what then? Do you think it's smart to focus only on enterprise software development today? I don't mind developing a bigger web-based app or doing server-related stuff either. Everything but startups and developing sites for my cousin's friend's sister hair saloon.
What is the smartest way to go with C# as a starting point in terms of job opportunities?3 -
Yesterday I told an intern that was supposed to be shadowing me that he'll need to download visual studios with apache Cordova plugin for multi platform app design. I gave this assignment to him first thing in the morning (around 9:30 am) and told him to head home for the day thinking I was giving the kid a break to download and make sure the build was proper and to play around with it maybe. I check my inbox this morning to find that, alongside numerous expletives, this intern has quit as of 3:40 AM last night. I... I didn't see that one coming.4
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Tonight I spent 5 hours installing arch. After seeing everything go smoothly I do the final reboot, only to watch the grub command line appear on the screen. I tried to boot into my arch installation but it kept talking about kernels missing and stuff. I thought I learned a ton but Fuck me. Now I'm installing neon kde just so I have my fucking linux desktop ready. Maybe someday I'll make it...3
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I've switched from pycharm to sublime to vsocde in a month, now vim is catching my eye, my mentor will kill me if i started using vim now but it's freaking interesting, will be learning a little bit of vim, will stick to vscode for long term i guess.13
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About to learn the world of Linux with my raspberry pi. Seems like I have ridden fail2ban into an un-removable nor fixable state. Fml 🙈4
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This happened when I was in the first semester of my study (I'm currently studying Computer Science).
Didn't understand anything, never learned to code before. My first "project" from my lecturer was to write a mini-journal together with two friends of mine (which weren't able to code either) about the link of VR use with the increase/decrease of the user's heart rate.
We didn't find any way to record the user's heart rate automatically and periodically. The deadline was getting closer but thankfully we found an android app that can be used to detect someone's heart rate with the user's finger pressed onto the camera. Sadly the app can't be used to record the data periodically (it can only show us the average heart rate). We told my lecturer (who is supossed to "guide" us here) about the problem and asked him for solutions.
He told us to "modify the .apk and connect it to a database".
At this point, we didn't even know how to make a database, let alone "modify the .apk".
In the end, we used an oximeter, recorded it, and listed the results manually. 😂2 -
Not exactly a "programming" rant but...
Was going to try setting up oculus for the first time. I followed the instructions from the main site but somehow it doesn't work. Had no one to ask. The only thing I can do was to seek help from the community.
Most of the community was on reddit.
Best part is, reddit turns out to be blocked in my country.
p.s. I know VPNs can be used, but how if someone that doesn't know about VPNs and stuff can access it? Isn't it kind of unfair to them?7 -
Hey guys, I'm a noob developer (learning Java for a year now), I've come to the end of my year and I'm trying to think challenging project for myself but something that is plausible to do. I've made simple things like text editors and quiz games in the past but I would like to make something that is somewhat useful...
Any help would be greatly appreciated! :)11 -
So I just started watching Eli The Computer Guy's videos on networking and I really like them so far(only on the introduction so far though), but I was a bit confused about some of the stuff and I thought to myself that some of this might be obsolote or not so much in use these days/different. So here are some questions(now bear with me, I'm still a noob to the whole topic of networking):
-Are Eli's videos on networking obsolete(besides the speeds that he talks about), what you recommend some other tutorial, if so which one?
-Is a switch necessary for a small network?
-Do we still connect routers to modems or do we just use what we refer to as a router(a mix between a router and a modem -> gateway/gateway router)?
-Can you connect an ethernet cable to your router/gateway?
-So according to Eli if you have multiple routers they make seperate networks that cant just be acessed from each other, then how come it be that I can access my rasperry pi when I'm connected on the network of one router when the raspberry pi is connected to the network of another router and how come it be that once you have the wifi password you can connect to all of them?14 -
Linux - Debian
Hey guys
So I finally have a phone that can run Linux without lag
Already have Debian installed and lxde... Im a complete noob, what should I install more? And any tips for a new user??
Thanks8 -
Never knew ww1.localhost.3000 is registered until a noob in our team tried to access the local dev server :(10
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What are some good introductory level CTFs?
I've got a free day tomorrow without any class, so I'm trying to work on something fun but useful.17 -
I recently started to use automated tests for everything and it is really great to not worry about every little change anymore.
But I think I'm not very good at it. The tests themselves are quite slow and I'm not sure if I'm covering everything the right way. Also, I'm very slow at writing the test cases.
SO I want to learn more about it. Do you have any recommended books on this topic? Anything about unit or feature tests and TDD, language specific (PHP) or general is appreciated -
I've been working in industry for 2-3 months after graduating from CompuSci last year, doing big data stuff surrounded by people with huge amounts of experience. I've learnt a lot but I'm still being overwhelmed by all the stuff I'm being told to do that seems second nature to my seniors and there's not enough time to Google it all and understand it ;____;3
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So my recruiter decided to calc his own bruto salary(gross) over my netto one...
Turns out he missed about 800 euro in his conversion ratio... Motherfucker ... That sets me back 5 years in salary u asshole 😶 -
So I feel confident at least in my front end development skills to maybe start freelancing in the near future. Does anybody have any good recommendations for where to start? How to draw in remote clients? Etc. I honestly dont know the first thing about remote work other than what I've researched.2
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Recently started an apprenticeship as software developer and tried to build something with JavaScript... aka. copy pasted a bit and after a while my brain kept shouting at me: "YOU DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT YOURE DOING, TAKE A FKIN BOOK AND YOU'LL MAYBE UNDERSTAND WHAT YOURE DOING THERE!" - and I did... turns out that the book is quite old and I finally landed on Codecademy - now I make progress :).
Made some smaller things in other languages before, but never really understood things like objects and classes... codecademy helps! And I can already laugh about some things here :D. This app is great! I feel like I'm part of "something".
Have a nice Day :)!4 -
Why is my the fingerprint for my public ssh-key seen not as a sha256-fingerprint?
Left: Windows
Right: Raspberry
3 -
Happy to be here 1st day and I'm enjoying it ,best social network ever for programmers ...been looking for such for so long and starting to get addicted.
Here I've learnt here that I need to start learning new stuff real fast.
Here I feel not alone,cos here I feel at home.
I'm Sam from Nigeria ( any Nigerian here?)2 -
I'm planing to learn Python but I'm not sure about the best resource I should learn it from. Help me, fellow pro people11
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Html and CSS and Noob
hey guys
trying to do something, search my ass off and can't find it.
So, I have a e page to access tables (another html file)
you can check It at rjpf.ddns.net .
I have a menu, with links to a iFrame, but that is not a good solution for cellphones.
I want to click the button and insert the html inside the main Div , instead of using frames.
how can I do that ?
so>
click the link(CSS button),
opens another page in the div
when I click another button opens another html file in the same DIV
tht way instead of a frame that is had to scroll It would be a single page, easy to paged own in cellphones.
Have another question but this oné must be taken care of first.
Thanks in adance11 -
Very noob question. I started using git/github for my classes in Python, but I dont see why is it any better than google drive or onedrive, since you can also send multiple archives and have it synced to your computer without having to "push". Why is it so popular and needed?12
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Tfw you accepted a project you thought you "can" work on, but over time it turns out that you won't be able to finish the project on time.
:')7 -
Quite new here. Is this more of a "I fkud up things, wanna here them" community or can questions to specific problems be asked here too?8
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I want to develop a django quiz app which will show questions to all online users at same time and allot a short time slot(1min) for answering questions.
How can i do that?
Any kind of help/link/hint is appreciated.
Thanks in advance.3 -
Was really motivated and started out with Android development.
Android studio is sick as fuck.I am struck in the second step.The only solution I can find is "try restarting your system".
Like wtf arrrgh!!
After gazillion times of restarts later. Finally, I am giving up.
Thank you google, now go f*ck yourself.9 -
Finally, started to learn backend dev. Currently starting with django. What'd you guys suggest I do further? (apart from nodejs)8
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So i've started learning Java. I used sololearn for the basics and bucky on YouTube for more advanced stuff. Does anyone have a tip what to try next? Or maybe some starter projects to really get to know more about the language?6
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Been trying to learn Docker when I hit a brick wall. How do I use nginx reverse proxy + letsencrypt with multiple containers? I only managed to do it with a single container. Using docker-compose or stuff like that I guess?6
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I have always wanted to be a writer. I just pirated Dan Brown's origin and immediately felt bad. suddenly I got this feeling, if god decides to include all the pirates as sinners and tries to wipe them out like Thanos did I am pretty sure 75% of them would be outta this world (considering even mp3 downloads as piracy). I might need a special therapy to calm myself down if at all I write a book and I find it pirated across the internet.1
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if (in_array($needle, $haystack)){
return true;
}else{
return false;
}
# yeah, I did it.... wtf brain!!1 -
Not really a rant but..
I'm really into programming. My problem is that i dont know what to do. I know the basics of a few languages like C++, Java, Python, HTML(+CSS), js but i want to start doing some more advanced stuff. I just don't know where to start.
What im trying to say is that im not a complete noob. It's just really fucking annoying when you want to start working on something but you dont know what or you come up with an idea that you abandon later because you can't turn it into a complete project.
Any help would be appreciated.12 -
Where should i go to get started with some sort of testing for my expressjs apps ?
I'm a complete testing noob1 -
Devs with gaming mice.
What hotkeys / macros do you use?
For years I've been using gaming gear with additional buttons to map various hotkeys and macros to speed up my work flow.
Let's share the use cases here.4 -
Nothing compares to the amount of times I cloned a git repository because I messed a commit back when I first learned git
-
Noob alert !
Plz feed me some c# projects!!
Mayn i ve been only reading and learning from book(c# 7.0 in a nutshell) i feel like i need to implement the stuff i learned so paliz help me daddy !
Again i am noob simple uni projects would be fine!
Projects with oop datastructure and simple database would do the job!
But if you have better suggestions feed me !
Thanks :)26 -
Hello, I am doing master in Pharmacy, but I like programming and consider to switch or connect somehow industries. I could write simple scripts and small programmes in Python, but I want to write code with good practice from beginning.
So my question what should I know and put in use, maybe some resources if someone has them or just terms for further search. At this moment I use gitlab for VCS (my commits sucks and my whole usage of Git sucks, but at least I use branches), I am trying to separate control from model (MVC but I guess I do it poorly), also I use keepchangelog rules for changeling, and semantic versioning for versions, PEP8 and Pokemon names for my variables and functions as it helps read code later.8 -
Started working on our rails application today. Haven't used ruby before :( and there is not even a single line of comment in the entire status application!! At least a comment like "Auto-generated please don't touch" would have helped :/1
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I'm just beginning to learn about Javascript, and I'm not sure if I like the fact that variables, declared outside of functions, become global. How do other people feel about it?6
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Currently collecting old Hong Kong Action Movies. Jackie Chan, Michelle Yeoh, Sammo Hung, Jet Li... Good Times :)1
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I'm trying out Linux, first installed Debian, then moved to Ubuntu.
Figured that I'd rather use a vm as my dev machine than mess with my main computer.
Quite nice. Though VirtualBox sometimes messes up.
Anyone have any suggestions for me?6 -
So today I tried to code in c++ by separating class code into header and cpp file which I had not done before. Compiler was throwing error while compiling, "undefined reference to std::cout". Took me nearly an hour to figure out I was using gcc instead of g++.6
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I was a frontend developer, and I am new to hadoop or anything related to big data.
I am currently working as a Hadoop developer and I get to work on one of existing codebase also I am trying to recollect Java which I learnt during college.
Can u please provide me any inputs on how to get started with Hadoop, a personal view point on scope and future of Hadoop. A rough time span of how long it took for you to get out of the noob zone.
If you could provide me with a good tutorial or blog that would be awesome.
Thanks in advance1 -
Hey :) I've started studying and I have to submit programming work together with some other students (who don't know much about programming) One of them has produced 70 lines of code to sum the numbers from 1 to n... How do I tell them they suck? And how do I help them improve?2
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I want to have a persistent game, where I correct all of the wrongs of the world in the past and the game then shows me how the present and future of real life would look like...
Say is the IBM Summit Supercomputer free for a telnet session? Stupid shit is playing petrus (Weather prediction) all the time...2 -
Twas the moment while i was exposed to java on the commandline and windows editor and needed to grasp the shit to read input with bufferredReader and Inputstreamreader while my head was constantly spinning between the javadocs and the screen. In that moment my friend opened his eclipse and showed me code completion! And the fucking Screenreader class. I immediatly realized it was not only important to finish the assignment but also as fast and as lazy as possible!
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The feeling when you create an enlarging fractal similar to Levy C because you want to draw simple Hilbert's curve with an old code you wrote when you were a noob.
I was an awesome noob apparently.
-
So, is it just me or are the numbers of newbie developers who can actually read error messages dwindling?
-
I'm going to ask a silly question... When I was introduced to databases, I was shown using Access. The interface Access used seemed to me to be fairly intuitive.
When I was introduced to MySQL, I guessed there would be some tool or other that would allow a similar design and manipulation of a database using a GUI.
MySQL Workbench didn't seem to be great for the task.
What is the 'proper' method used by actual DB devs?2 -
Came across this
Is making apps haram?
The answer top answer would surprise you
https://islam.stackexchange.com/que...5 -
Pressing the provisioning profiles "fix this issue" button in Xcode... And getting roasted for being a noob by the entire office.1
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I was trying to set up my own "cloud" for iot experiments. I planned to use Intel Edison with mqtt broker (using mosca) and a node js app for providing API for mobiles and browser. And also to do other book keeping.
I spent the half day trying figure how to expose these servers to internet.
I configured ddns in noip.com and ddns settings configured to it in my router.
Port forwarded to the local server services I needed.
And then tested. Worked perfectly on any device in my router connected network. Tested on mobile network. Bam! It fucking doesn't work.
Then connected another router.
Double port forwarded. Again worked perfectly on router network. And failed on mobile.
Tested if ddns is right. Did nslookup it was fine as fuck.
Then disabled port forwarding. Did dmz. Nope. Nadda. No luck.
Then scratched my head so hard that I lost more already losing hairs.
Then remembered about router hardware firewall. Disabled it.
Tested
And there it didn't work.
My dreams shattered like a fucking deer hit by car on highway.
Didn't work.
Then I see the IP pointing to my router in nslookup. Its 172.20.xx.xx. Its a fucking private IP.
My Asshole ISP is running another private network behind firewall. Which I fucking can't port forward
Now I think how much of a noob and idiot I am. Fuck this shit. Fuck all of these shit.
I am going for SaaS option for mqtt broker.
(Or help me?)
Once again.
Asshole ISP.
Fuck your firewall.
(PS: I had test the next day. FML)2 -
Was on Educational Consultancy for counselling. Asked them about their website, they gave me their Cpanel password to add some feature. After all I am just a noob. God knows what is going to happen to their site.
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Was moved from frontend to backend. I am an absolute noob in java, code has no documentation, no formal training, code has cross repository dependencies and I have been assigned with a case and was asked to debug, felt like a pathetic piece of shit. One of those depressing days, but the good thing is we were moved here as an entire team and apparently everyone feels the same way 😂 which makes me feel better.
These are one of those short phase of "0 productivity" days, I wish Java god help me and let me write code with my usual speed, untill then I am going to feel miserable and bad about myself. -
Trying to get few things out of my chest.
Nothing is more frustrating than to make use of a bloated base code. Though it gets the job done, trying to fix bug-bombs planted by other developers is nerve wrecking and makes me feel like a member of bomb-squad. Damn!!
Also,
To the SUV guy who took a sudden left to dodge the pit, you startled me and I am sorry to have flicked my finger at you. I honestly didn't notice you had your family in car, heat of the moment made me do it. 3 weeks gone, still unable to get over it. Forgive mee!! -
It may not be the place to do so but I need your opinions.
I already said that but I would like to switch from Windows to Linux but I don't know which distrib to choose. For long time I was up to some Debian/Ubuntu but now I feel like going Arch ou Deepin.
Have you guys tried some of those? Do you liked it?
And please, I'm not trying to start world war three here! Have a little "courtoisie" and please be gentle with me I'm still a noob in all this (already tried Ubuntu tho' and didn't liked the Gnome graphics).7 -
Having one year of experience in javascript and almost a year of experience in java. I am still not sure which one to use for interviews.
Would I able to handle questions on hashmap and hashset if I chose to work our data structures problem in javascript?.1 -
Hey guys, I'm new to coding and DevRant. I was looking for some ground to learn some cool stuff but don't know were to start. What are some good languages to start? I know Python and VBA for now. What are some good sites for learning??4
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What things do you keep in mind when learning a new language, when your main goal is to use it in building projects in a framework?
For eg i am beginning to learn flutter and i am finding a need to learn basic dart things like creating variables, loops, classes, functions, constructors, etc...
What are the most important "language concepts" if you may say it that?1 -
Been learning more about crypto and blockchain (i know i know buzzword) but I mean I'm still a noob at pretty much everything so it was hard to find something that explains all that at a really technical level. BUT I then found www.cryptoeconomics.study
and it's been going great 😊 -
A news reporter asked Kobe how did he manage to maintain his performance being the best NBA player. Kobe replied and asked the reporter he know how does LA looks like at 4am.
Shit Kobe wakes up at 4am and go to training at court. Why I stay awake till 4am yet I'm a mediocre programmer lulz1 -
Okay, i have a question.
I am a real Noob when it comes to Java programming. I am trying to establish a database connection between my program and a sqlite database. I have everything ready:
- The Model
- The View
Now the problem i am having is defining the DBController that establishes the connection. And i have no idea how to start?!
Please help me :(
Love yall3 -
Does anybody here have any casual affinity towards reading scientific papers? During my time at the university I was exposed to read papers and found them quite exciting as they were actually informational. Articles from magazines or online ressources about yet another "groundbreaking" new tech feel hollow. And theres to much noise from hyping, evangelists and other distracting elements.
-
Timecalculations and Datetime manipulation from UTC to locale where locale can be anything are by itself annoying but Javas Date and Calendar APIs always make me feel like "Seriously?! Fuck you! What do you want from me?! "
Argh....
Wasting so much time right now to get a fairly easy app built as showcase for new customers and continue with my life!2 -
I'm midway through summer with an internship and college coming up. Yet I haven't finished a single personal project cause I get lazy or frustrated. Yay destruction of my future!1
-
I got an assignment grom a company I interviewed in to make a simple CRUD app using Node and vue.js.
I have already built the entire server(it even serves html and static files now) but I'm a noob regarding frontend web.
I tried to use webpack and scaffolding tools but they make the job much more complicated than it needs to be.
How do I build a frontend in Vue using only the tags and local files, no special bundlers or tools?2 -
So im very comfused what people are creating in python. what are u guys making!
Just learned started merning the langauge and i wanna make some small dumb applications using it1 -
Trying to teach work experience kids is hard af when you barely know how to explain, you just kinda do it daily so you figure stuff out
-
Not a rant but how can I go about maybe getting a tutor or a mentor to help me with my java efforts. I'm self taught and I've been at it for about 4 months.1
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Started my new job this week. I'm a backend developer and need to learn React. What are the best resources to learn? I have managed to install everything and create an example app but I feel like I need some tutoring as I have no idea what I am doing. I'm a JS noob as well so that makes it even more difficult. Do you guys have any recommendations? The official docs for React is kinda lacking imo.
-
!Rant
Any tips for eye soreness? I don't feel it when I am working in front of the computer but it gets sore at the end of the day and few minutes in the morning the day after.I typically see the screen for around 9 hours.
Is this common? How do you devs overcome this? How do you devs protect your eyes? I'd like to get any tips from you people.
Thanks5 -
Does anyone know an easy to use server to run a java algorithm? Like I'm a total noob yet and I need something where I unzip the src folder and I get it up and running. Terminal use is ok. Each run takes me 8 hours and I need workforce...
I want my computer back for my personal projects :/2 -
I am doing some late night developing because I feel excited about my own project after a long slog of refactoring and ground work... and my IDE is getting weird leading to long compilation times :(
Dear World. I am doing my life-chores so please let me get my shit done for once!
I was this close to fall asleep content tonight... -
So noob question, is automated web scraping a thing? What would you do if you wanted to grab the same information off similar sites and store it in a table that can be manipulated later? All you would have to do is enter the web site link after you finished coding it. I've used Chrome web scraping extensions but want a more automated solution.10
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I don't know much programming languages. I know some but I am not good at them. Going through the post here I came to know about VCS and git. I learned it, now I know git however I have nothing to implement that knowledge on as I know very few language.2
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Probably a super noob question: I have a droplet on DigitalOcean with a website. What is the best to update it, make changes? My idea was to clone the droplet, make the changes and then point my domain to the new ip, but I have to wait for hours for the changes to take place...4
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is it a good idea to try to learn HTML5 and Javascript at the same time while I'm only just starting to get a hang of Python?
-
I'm a complete noob in this tech world so finding a job it's getting hard (for me).
I applyed to be a highschool teacher so they made me some tests and apparently i'm too narcissistic for the job, although they recommended me to try tech related stuff.
Soooo... Did i hurt your feelings, because teaching wasn't my first choice?
Still looking for a job.
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