How does a front-end developer get away with murder?

$('body').hide();

//I'll see myself out

This never gets old...

Childhood ruined

Not sure if it has been here, but the height of SO:

Current State

Who thought teaching jQuery BEFORE JavaScript was a good idea?

Jake ...who?

Client: "I need css3 html5 jQuery based fluid and responsive design UI with d3.js charts..."

Me: which browsers do u have...?

Client: oh for security reasons we only allow IE6 and we have Win XP OS only...

Me: So how closely are u related to Donald Trump..??

FUCK PEOPLE ON STACKOVERFLOW ANSWERING JAVASCRIPT QUESTIONS WITH FUCKIN JQUERY SOLUTIONS! IF I EVER WANT JQUERY I WILL TELL YA!

NOW GTFO AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!!!

Stack Overflow users in a nutshell:

*8 months ago*

Noob: "How can I do this with Javascript?"
SO User: "You should use jQuery. Here's how to do this in jQuery."

*Now*

Noob: "How can I do this with jQuery?"
SO User: "jQuery is redundant now. Here's how you can do it with Javascript."

not enough jQuery

Found this code back in jQuery 1.9.1. Checked again, and t is still here in jQuery 3.1.0. Suppose it is just in case the values of true and false ever change 😃

Hey, wanna hear a disappointing stack?

- WordPress
- jQuery
- vanilla inline CSS
- shitty random legacy PHP

Disclaimer:
The author is NOT responsible nor liable for any injuries, mental health issues, sanitary problems, asexuality, crippling depression, triggered by this rant nor liable for any damaged walls, hurt animals or deaths.

now that's a proper code rant (original from our code)

Happens way too often

WHY THE ACTUALL FUCK DO PEOPLE PUT JQUERY IN EVERY FUCKING PROJECT EVEN IF IT IS A FUCKING ELECTRON APP AND EVEN WORSE WHY FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO THEY MIX VUE AND JQUERY JUST WHYYY 😢

After interviewing tens of candidates, finally found that one guy who doesn't start the conversation by mentioning jQuery 😂

Too many people started off with jQuery and didn't even bother to learn more about Javascript itself.

$(this).fadeOut('slow');

I once had Javascript and jQuery on the same line in my resume (no longer the case).

Was told I clearly didn't know what I was talking about because "Javascript and jQuery are two completely different languages"

worst advice:
"Use only jQuery, js is shit"
"Use only js, jQuery is shit"

Dude, use whatever dafuq you want, both have their pros and cons..

Using JQuery to load JQuery. What's next?

Spot the difference and guess how much time I've wasted on that.... 😠

Today, I:
jQuery -> vanilla javascript
npm uninstall jquery
performance++

SO: How to ... in JavaScript?

Answer: use jQuery!

SO: How to ... in JavaScript without jQuery?

Answer: use jQuery!

Me: ffffffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu I hate j-f*cking-query, I don't want to learn it!!

Bane.js

Saying you know Javascript when you only know jQuery fells like inviting friends over for dinner and serve frozen food.

JQuery? No thank you, i like it vanilla. Like my porn.

Just replaced all the Jquery functions with pure javascript in my website :)

Why THE FUCK does the StackOverflow Community answer any JS related question with a solution containing jQuery - sometimes even without mentioning it?

Gosh - it's 2017 use Vanilla or at least a modern libary!

Good ol' jquery still going.

Conversation between two freshmen overheard two days ago... They where talking about a webpage that should (or shouldn't) refresh every 30 seconds or so to display an always up-to-date stock for some product.
G1 : "I'd do it in PHP"
G2 : "Dude, no, that'd be a lot of load on the server if a great lot of people were on the site. Imagine, every 30 seconds, it would receive a request, access to the DB, generate the webpage, respond to the request, for like, 1000 or 10000 requests at a time! You update the value client-side."
G1 : "How'd you do it?"
G2 : "JQuery, my friend. You know JavaScript right? It's like scripting in the browser. Well, JQuery is... how to say it... JQuery is JavaScript but able to do requests to servers without reloading the page."

I stopped listening because I had to repress my impulse to interfere to explain a thing or two.

Them: which language should I learn? JavaScript or Jquery?'

Me:

There will always be that one person who ruins all the fun

PS: Speaking of JQuery, I really found it to be somewhat slow. Is it slow or am I doing something wrong?

Pictorial representation of jQuery in the ocean of JavaScript.

I always get a little angry when I'm looking for the solution to a problem I have with JavaScript and the answerer has the solution in JQuery. Like, not everyone uses that people!

My sex life:

<script>

$(document).ready(function(){
})

</script>

Sometimes, you have to swallow your pride and use jQuery.

When your coding in a web design class and your assignment is due tomorrow.

Your mind is programmable - if you're not programming your mind, someone else will program it for you.

I know it's a bit old. This is just a heads up to javascript newbies.

Fuck all these CSS frameworks using Jquery as their dependency. Cross-browser my ass.

I am going full flexbox.

Learning jQuery before JavaScript is the worst mistake I made!

“Written in pure React”

What’s impure react then? React with angular? Or with jquery?

For fuck's sake

The end always near.

When you look at your own code and are like "wow that's sloppy"

So I watched this video that tries to convince people, that the jQuery library isn't really best practice anymore and showed how you can achieve basic tasks with vanilla JS, aswell as some frameworks (Vue, React, Angualar) and how they handle interactions with the DOM.

It also talked about how nearly every JS question on SO has top answers using jQuery, and how that's a bad thing.

But what I found in the comment section of this video was pure horror: So-called "Developers" defending jQuery to the death. Of course there were some people who made some viable arguments (legacy code, quick & dirty projects), but the overwhelming majority were people making absurd claims and they seemed quit self-confident.

GOSH!

Want an example?
Look:

There was a time when a fellow dev asked me if it was possible to use JavaScript in jQuery code... Yeah, true story

the best friends
#dom #jquery #programming #coding

Found in one of the projects I had to implement fixes.

My god...

Argh... Fuck you with a rusty pole while monkeys hanging on them. Why the fuck did you not take the extra five minutes that would have been taken to restrict that fucking datepicker to not allow users to pick a date before the current day??

Thanks to you asshole I've managed to book my accommodation from February 2nd to 4th instead of March.

Now I don't have anywhere to sleep while I must go there for the weekend because I have some course to attend to.

Abso-fucking-lutely great.

I recently ranted so much about languages but here it goes

JS we need to talk. BECAUSE YOU GOT FAT AND UGLY STUPID BITCH! Dumb piece of bloatware. What even is your problem? Depending on a library for strpad and then blow up like Steve jobs ego. Bastardized fuckfest. I used to like you bro and then you screw me over!
It's like you fuck my wife while I try to fix your car. Why can't you even be usefully on your own anymore? I'd be richer than bill gates if I get a dollar for every damn framework people pull from their asses. Are you writing this fuck while shitting so you can compare colors of your outcome?

Normalize the fucking base, don't add to the bukkakke! bitch is drowning already. Why is everyone jerking of to react and angular? When have YOU written something in vanilla the last time? Why even bother? Remove the core and hardcore every damn framework into the browsers. Guess that saves you 200kb. Oh wait I forgot that's about unminified jQuery.

Now I need to load about 2GB of dependencies, some creating code that puts code in my code to load code out of my code which was generated out of something that remotely resembles JS so every browser is able to execute my fancy shit. But hey, it's fast. And of course there are the fanboys. You are worse than apple fags. You sample your own jizz with your friends in a wine glass. there was a Time it was bad practice to mix logic and view. Now you made it mandatory. "Browser does the rendering" ofc you imbecile pile of fuck don't show me a damn preloader for 1 picture and 20 lines of text. Who fucked your brain so hard?

So react seems to be the cool kid now, then I tell someone I know angular it's like showing up in a pikachu onsie to a formal dinner with the queen.

I used to love you girl. I loved how we could dirty things together. Now you are like a pig. Please loose weight bby the sight of you disgusts me nowadays

My boss is a developer who didn't use github or svn, and he's a millionaire. I'm jealous because he use jquery and still able to make tons of money.

WTF is with the entire Angular2 eco system and "half instructions". Started learning it and every inch is a struggle, out dated docs and code samples and then this style of shit:

Google: "Angular2 and bootstrap"
Result: "Install ng-bootstrap to get native bootstrap components written in Angular by the Angular UI team"
Me: Install != work

Google: "ng-bootstrap not working"
Result: "You also need to install bootstrap css, heres how"
Me: Install, plus try component
Error: "Bootstrap requires jQuery"

Google: "Installing jQuery in Angular 2"
Result: <Instructions>
Me: Install, still not working

Google "Angular2 ng-bootstrap bootstrap jQuery"
Result: "Don't forget to also include Tether"

WHY DID THE FUCKING "ANGULAR-UI" TEAM NOT MENTION ANY OF THIS

I'm not really keen in relying too much on JavaScript to render a properly functioning web page. HTML and CSS is now than good enough for it nowadays.

But if due to technical limitations, i have to use JavaScript, I make sure to not use jquery.

I don't like jquery.

People that call themselves JavaScript developers but can't figure out how to update the DOM without using jQuery

Please tell me I'm not the only one who gets really annoyed when someone uses jQuery to do stuff that would take the same amount of pure JS. I think these days many people only use jQuery out of laziness, not because it's necessary. Why load an entire library to set CSS attributes and innerHTML? Yes, there was a time when it was very useful to have jQuery, but today we have querySelectorAll and all that. You can save plenty of kBs, load time and improve performance.

Next time you're about to load jQuery ask yourself: do I really need it? Chances are the answer will be no.

During interview...

Interviewer: Do you know what is JQuery?
Applicants: Yes?
Interviewer: what is JQuery?
Applicants: am.... (in a couple of minutes thinking, the right answer that could be)
Applicants: JQuery is Java Query?

a pretty honest mistakes where the applicant do not know the answer and looks confident during interview

Am I a machochistic fuck?
This sunday I had the glorious idea to fix a not-so-recent Wordpress website for a friend.
Imagine an upgrade from 3.3.2 to 4.9.8! (and PHP 5.5.old to 7.2.new

Oh boy. I thought it was impossible, because the site uses a free theme from 2012 and had some other plugins installed.
But what kind of developer am I, if I give up so easily?

I forced XAMPP to run PHP 5.6.stoneage in order to let me debug this thing. After some fixing in different files, I was able to get the admin panel back, disabled some plugins and then overwrote the installation with WP 4.9.8. After firing up the admin panel I had to fix 20 differend PHP files in the plugins.

Finally! After the plugins were updated, all worked again.
Except for the backend part of this free crappy theme. It uses an old version of JQuery UI widgets with custom mods.
I've done enough for today so I let it be like this. I'm not in the mood to load a second JQuery version.

Debugging AJAX is one of the most shitty tasks that exist in the world of Web Development.

People who says jQuery is a programming language should go back to
alert("hello world")
exercises.
Man, I hate those guys

Classroom fuckery: I'm in a Computer Information Technology program and I usually spend the last hour of class working on code. Most of the people in this program are going into networking or security. This kid looks over and freaks out, starts yelling that I'm breaking into the school's network. I was on freecodecamp.com.

So i was contributing to this project on github with a dangerously close (self-assigned) deadline and my friends called me to play some DotA. Well, i can say i didn't let anyone down.

"Just use jQuery"

Many years ago when I changed to my second job, I had to do a lot more JavaScript work and upon Googling for a solution, that's when I came across jQuery. The idea of only having to write a few lines instead of multiple lines just to do a simple task was pretty exciting.

Plus looking through the docs and reading up about animations, I thought that was pretty cool and started playing around with it. Eventually I came to a project where I needed an interactive form and so I used jQuery to handle a lot of the UI work. My managers and the client were pretty excited about seeing how stuff can appear/disappear.

Local IT company proposes to give talks about the basics of web development in our school for one and a half week.

>"And now we're going to learn more about JavaScript."
>"The first thing we need to do is to import jQuery in our webpage."
>Literally no mention of plain JS.

this is why jquery is still not dead...........

I'm a realistic programmer. I don't give a shit to react, redux, flux, angular 2, typescript, webpack unless I earn 6 figure USD like those who have luxury time to invent crazy stuff like in above list.. In my country jquery is king!

I want to reach this level of excellence. I searched, "How to clone object in JavaScript?".

- Why don't you use jQuery and Ajax instead of Vue?
- jQuery, nor Ajax, is not really an MVC.
- Yes, it is.
My face: 😟

Is anyone else here using Vue.js? I love it especially after using jQuery for pretty much everything

[sees majority of rants about JQuery]

Me: "I use express"

Those jQuery fuckers spam their shit into every damn article or video. Why do you retards even use it in 2018? JavaScript has evolved and can do all the useless shit jQuery does in an equal style.
I hate to see modern front-end tutorials using this useless ugly tool.

"just use jQuery"

sometimes i feel like im the only JS developer who doesnt use Jquery on every project.

While Google is developing breakthrough AI systems that might quite possibly pass the Turing tests in the near future, my university suggests I learn JQUERY and calls the course Advanced Web Programming

I'm learning web development, and this is another small project that I made - a basic code player.
Used jQuery for the first time and realized how easy it makes things.

PS - I know it is pretty insignificant given that people here create much bigger things, but I'm proud of it!

PPS - Will post the previous small project I'd done. It was a browser based basic game.

I clearly remember when my boss, shortly after founding the company, told me that we won't add support for $IE_version < 11 in frontend stuff. Guess what I had to do a lot since those 2 years I'm there...

Cleaning up code...

var screenshotPanel = $(this).parent().parent().parent().parent().next().next();

Kill me now.

I've been staffed on a old ongoing project, first day.
0. Compatibility has to be guaranteed down till IE9... ppf.
1. Front end made in XHTML+JS(jQuery)... bah, ok.
2. XHTML+JS is actually generated by PHP5.4, not a line is actually statically served... beh, funny, ok.
3. PHP files are the output of an XSLT transform of a bunch of XMLs... meh, seriously? Oooook.
4. XMLs are the product of the serialisation of a truck of stateful JavaEE6 DTOs populated magically (undocumented) with data coming from a SQL DB... WTF mode!!!
5. Session logics lives within PHP-land at point 2, front end makes ajax calls here that propagates to another WS out of our control that triggers -somehow- (undocumented) our Java backend at point 4 to generate new XMLs and then reach front end again. Kill me now.

Boss: look... it's too slow for the client, it's too heavy on our servers: fix it. Ah, and we sold 85% test coverage by October. You're the man for the job. (I'm a Node.js fullstacker and right now there's not even a testing scaffold, ofc).
Me: prod is on Linux or Windows?
Boss: RHEL7.
Me: rm -rf / as root. Done.
Boss: I know I know...
Me: ...

I think time has come...

Designers!!
What do ya think

A dashboard for a website
The cpu temp progress bar has jquery/AJAX wich outputs the cpu temperature at every each 3 second of the server wich is on a raspberry pi at the moment.

Does it look good for these days?

PS: used php for the backend

People who use a jQuery plugin to display and style radio buttons.........

Trying to get the name of all objects in an array i made , thank god there is nothing wrong here...

WHY DOES TYPESCRIPT EXIST OH MY FUCKING GOD WASN'T JAVASCRIPT ENOUGH

(just starting out on angular2 and i already hate it compared to jQuery)

Task:
Prevent users deleting items from the tokenInput.

Solution:
onDelete: function(item){
$("#token_input").tokenInput("add",item);
}

Fuck you Ajax
Fuck you js
Fuck you jQuery
Fuck you {{insert js frameworks}}

I've been learning ajax now and this shit happend

When people include the entire jQuery library to animate one single div 😑

Tried to use vanilla JS, 2 hours into it and after googling stuff : Fuck it, I'll use JQUERY

FFS jQuery is not the answer to every JS question!!!!!

wrote some JS to make sure that eForm fields which are hidden/disabled via checkboxes are nullified before the form submission. Checking the request and the fields are definitely empty. But the tester says the data is still appearing in the DB. So i am moving immediately to Nepal where i intend to live as a goat.

An iOS app which was basically a wrapper for a giant jQuery eForm.
~5000 lines of custom JS and it broke ALL THE DAMN TIME. A team of us worked on it for about a year and all we ever did was fix bugs. But the bug count never went down. The bugs just got replaced with more bugs.
Thankfully its not live anymore.
After the global thermonuclear war, all that will remain is cockroaches and jQuery.

Officially dropping jQuery. Porting to ES6 and transpilers. Burn in hell bloody witch!! hahaha

Annoys me so much how obviously lazy my department has been with one of its products. We have an iPad app that does document management and eForms and stuff. Its not perfect but not the worst. Then they decide they need to build an app to handle a specific kind of eForm. They just went "well this app already does eForms so lets just adapt it".
Worst. Decision. Ever.
the app is simply a branch off the original app. despite being a completely different product which isnt even concerned with the same business objects. it has been hacked until it does what it needs to. And i have to somehow maintain this trainwreck.
As a result we have a branch in our main Git repo that contains a completely different product, which is basically an iOS wrapper for an HTML eForm with ~5000 lines of jQuery to further hack on the functionality that the eForm provides.
And they wonder why iOS developers have been leaving and some keep threatening to leave. Even the Delivery Manager wants us to just do what is needed and get it out the door and never look at it again. How are we supposed to care when thats the attitude of the people who are supposed to be invested in it. Im surprised the client hasnt told us to get lost the app is so hideously broken and unmaintainable. Performing an action on the form can break a completely unrelated section somewhere else. We have lost control.
And they just keep adding more scope, ignoring our concerns cos hey its too late to just start changing the whole approach of the solution.

I must learn jQuery and NodeJS. It's amazing the potential of JS. My lastest 10 programs were written in pure JS and I made them in a few hours. As an electronic engineer I hate the high level languages but JS (and maybe Python) it's definitely excluded from the list.

I just saw the equalizer 2 at the cinema and about half way through there is a phone with "military grade encryption" on it. We see the phone screen showing the encryption and what is it? Freaking JQuery!

Why do people mix JS vanilla with framework syntax? That's horrible.

Why do people use jQuery anyways? There's no need at all anymore. It is just dumb JS for dumb devs.

Did that trigger you? - well....

Found this tonight:

// Francis GET request
$.get( "test.html", function(data) {
alert(data);
});

At my previous job, no matter how many times I explained it, "a jquery" was an image slider for by boss. No need to say new devs didn't know what the hell he was talking about when he said the clients wanted "a jquery".

I'm a contractor at a product company and today I had the pleasure of working with some jQuery.

A function needed to be called before another function, hard work right?

So I moved the call to the function 3 rows higher, checked it in, set the task as ready for test and started to look for other tasks.
Within a couple of minutes I get a direct message from another dev, let's call him Steve.
Steve wanted me to set the task to ready for code review instead of test, so I did just that and tried to move on.

Some minute or two later Steve contacts me again:
"It would be great if you'd move the comment so it'd be over the call to the function"

Well, I'm not one of those who likes comments... If you need a comment, it's probably not good/readable code. In some cases sure, it might be a complex block coming up.
Sorry, lost my train of thought.

I answered Steve : "Are you sure, I could just remove it instead?"

(for readability S will be Steve and M will be me)

S: Well, it's always good to have comments
M: In this case I think it will be alright.
S: But it's nice to see what the function is doing.
M: I'll do it if you really want me to.
S: It's better to have the comment than to not have it and needing it.
M: Okay then

The name of the function : LoadOrganizationTree()

And this is the comment :
//Load organization tree

Fuck jQuery. The only reason I see anyone using it legitemately is because of backwards compatibility. Almost every jq method is either native js or native css. The problem is, some devs become practically dependent on a library. By then, they are no longer js devs. They are jQuery devs. When you find yourself going to the docs of a lib before native methods 9 times out of 10 you've gone past the turning point. When you find yourself including jQuery instinctively, you're gone. StackOverflow is a great example of this:

Question - 1 up
Pure JS answer - 0 ups
jQuery answer (same length) - 2 ups and accepted

Come on man. It's 2018! We shouldn't be writing jQuery anymore. Native methods ftw!

I was conducting interviews today. There was a candidate who impressed me a lot and i was about to hire him but one question turned the interview into a hilarious situation.
Me: what are delegate events?
Candidate: events that are fired even if you click on the side of the button

Javascript !== jQuery
jQuery === Javascript

"This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes."

Said to a new team member before they embarked on a journey of pain as I took them through a huge web app made with jQuery (think: 10K lines of DOM manipulation horror), WCF, and sadness.

I was reading a bunch of tutorials lately, and some of them were so shitty I decided to make my own shitty tutorial, and it ended up something like this
(hope you can read it in the image. If not I'll post a link in comments)

Use only pure javascript! Jquery is crap

btw, i'm still using jquery

I was just wondering why my school decided it was better to learn JQuery before JS. Not that I haven't used JS during my first intership but for the ones in my class who only learned PHP, wouldn't it be best to first learn JS? I mean I feel like it's basicnlogic to first learn how to use a language before learning it's frameworks / libraries.

Lead-Dev: "These links don't work as they should, I'm having you fix them, 'kay?"
Me: "I'll have a look."
> The link doesn't do anything when you click on it.
My internal monologue: (The href is probably just wrong)
> It's not wrong.
Me: "What the fuck?"
Lead-Dev: "Can you fix it?"
Me: "I don't think I can."
Lead-Dev: "Why don't you try looking in thisScript.js?"
Me: "Oh, you think the click event got prevented or something?"
Lead-Dev: "No, I think something went wrong with what that script is doing with the jQuery library this site uses."
Me: "..."
Lead-Dev: "..."
Me: "jQuery... library...?"

My most intense day was in the company at the day we had to publish a website containing lots of jQuery & CSS animated stuff.
We planned to go live at 3pm but due to the fact that before lunch time there began to appear more and more styling and animation problems, we went live at around 9pm. I was sweating and nervous as hell the whole time.
At least my boss and I went to drink a few beers right after that. ;)

jQuery. jQuery everywhere.

People's dependency on this library would be like everybody carrying a tool chest with them, even for basic jobs like re-arranging a stack of books or collecting leaves in the yard. Cmon y'all, JS does a lot of this out of the box without the bloated library.

But then again, I'm addicted to MOMENTJS, so I should probably shut up now. 😆😄😬

Heard over the cubicle wall: "Jquery, every element is a turtle. Turtles all the way down."

What?

just spent 2-3 hours trying to make a slideshow responsive for mobiles.

position().left returned an incorrect value breaking the whole thing. then jquery animations slowly produced a one pixel discrepancy when everything is animating based on the container width. breaking the whole thing.

Only solution has been to pretend all is fine.

things that make you want to smash something.

We spent a lot of time creating these CSS animated pop-ups that described parts of the product. They looked great, but the client called and said they were "flickering" on her computer. We debugged and could not for the life of us figure out what she meant by flicker. The code was so simple that we couldn't imagine how it could be flickering. It was just a jQuery fadeIn(). It worked fine for us in every browser we tried. So we just gave up. The next day, the client called back and said,"Hey, it looks great. You fixed the flickering. How did you do it?" And our dev replied, "Uh, we set the flicker to 0".

!rant

Been working on a custom html partial injector (js/jquery only) as both a personal challenge and utility to use for my website scaffold. Being a challenge, i decided not to look at any implementation from another JS framework. I won't lie, i had it 'working' at least 5 times now, but this time, after about 3-4 days, i think i got it for real. And the cool thing? It's a bit less code than my original implementation even with my generous whitespace and verbosity. And it even unwraps nicely so it looks like a regular html page in the dev tools.

I love when things finally work as they should--God knows i question my motives before then.

That feel when an intern is tasked with implementing a web frontend for a project you're working on.

That feel when you open up one of the views and it's filled with JQuery spaghetti and your eyes glaze over.

That feel when you actually step through the code, and it actually makes sense and is remarkably light and clever for what it does.

That feel when you learned a bit more JQuery (a library that you never had any experience with before) and it made doing some more things an absolute breeze.

Thanks intern!

A few years ago, i was kinda bored on my internship, so i changed the name of all variables of some jquery functions i had on my code with lyrics from a song that was stuck on my head.
Never understood that code again.

jquery is awesome. Took me like 6 minutes of fiddling around to learn. And I'm a backend dev who doesn't know 2 cents about javascript.

jQuery gurus

Learning jquery after four straight years of vanilla js makes me feel really dirty.

Oh guys, i'm fucking tired with JQuery right now, a simple exercises doesn't goes well.

In cour company we need an online dashboard that monitors logfiles from various interface processes.

My collage and me, the newest company members (for almost 2 years) get the task to build this and get it presented as some intern project where we can try out some more recent technologies/frameworks.
Now in the first meeting our senior team leader told us we shoeldn't use the noew hot buzzword js frameworks.
Reason? They are not proven and wil probably lose popularity next year and we don't want to migrate everything every half year. Plus he had negeative experiences with Angular in some project he had to work on, probably just because his limited JS skils.
So he wants us to use jQuery to build a modern web application.

I get it you don't want to migrate to TheNewHotThing(tm) every year. Guess what? You fucking don't have to. If I build sonting in Vue.js now, it won't stop working when a new framework comes along.
Look at our own fucking ASP.NET Web Forms prooject, that stil works. Just don't deny the usability of modern frameworks.

All the people fucking hating jQuery all the time are so funny 😂 Why do you think it is so bad? I am a reasonable person if you have great arguments I might switch to only vanilla js. In my opinion its great.

you: "Should i use angular or react?"

me, an intellectual: "Should i use js or jQuery?"

When you want to move your site off of jQuery, but all the dependencies still use jQuery.

Also screw those services that write their client code with jQuery. Screw you all!

So, we were in middle of this in-house training session on Typescript, which was being held on Skype as the trainer was in another office in different city, when suddenly a senior fellow (working as associate architect and sitting right across the table from me in training session) asked a <put some nice adjective here> question:

Why should we use TypeScript? Why not jQuery?
There was silence for a few moments from the other end (there was no video of the trainer but I could feel the bewilderment on his face). Then the trainer broke the silence by saying that he didn't understand the question. After multiple attempts, I intervened by politely mentioning thay one is a language while the other is a library.
Here comes the best part
The senior guy replied and was rather adamant that I was wrong and that jQuery was, infect, a language.
I wonder, to this day, how he managed to become architect and who the fuck hired him?

What a coincidence. JQuery gets an update to 3.4.0 - and I removed the JQuery dependency that a mid-sized widget (15 kB minified) needed.

Rewriting the selector, css and trim stuff was easy. Each, children, append, empty, remove and extend were not too hard. Animations gave me more headache, but in the end, JS triggered CSS transitions worked nicely.

I was able to shave off the usual 30 kB over the wire for JQuery, and the whole thing seems snappier. Finally, I'm at vanilla everything!

Of course, it's largely due to JQuery's merits that vanilla JS is where it is today. So, thank you JQuery, and farewell.

jQuery strikes again.

I used jQuery to solve an issue today because I was too lazy to restructure the way my site was rendered by my framework :(

Well I wish I could abandon jQuery and bootstrap all together and just use some vuejs admin template with my Laravel app. But things are not that easy and I am a lvl 1.0 vuejs user.

So sorry V girl, you gotta learn how to live with Mr.J for a few more months.

jQuery in Angular code

that moment when you're very proud of yourself, spending almost a week making a workaround for a problem with a plugin but as you double check the plugin for similarity with what you want to accomplish, it already has a frickin method for it
fml

Trying to learn es6 JavaScript and Vue js, whilst also maintaining sites using jquery.

My head is about to explode...

Today our webdev prof: "you must use bootstrap! You are not allowed to define your own classes!"

He's a nice guy, but I don't like frameworks, especially if they rely on other frameworks so much that you basically have another language.

Holy fuck, why the heck you ask mathematical question for a front end position? I'm going home.

Was using webstorm and it kept on hanging lately. Just started using Atom, it's so cool. Webstorm has more features but if you want one in atom you can install a pakage, disable/ uninstall if not needed.

Refactored my current portfolio grid :) Decided to remove margins for a cleaner look and removed slideshow functionality because things became too slow and it really doesn't need it.

Is npm the new jQuery Plugins site?

jQuery

I love the simplicity of jQuery and Angular 1.0 - you just include the JS files and off you go. No additional dependencies or messing around.

Javascript in general (jquery, Ajax, nodejs and so on) is my greatest weakness. I've been working on a project which a great part is js and it's slapping in my face that I don't really know js. It's frustrating as fuck but it's a great experience, because I can now work on my weakness and turn it into my greatest strength. So let's see how it goes. If I don't smash my head into a wall in absolute rage that is...

As long as I deliver, can I use jquery? Need not complicated things with framework, you're not building another Facebook that will serve millions, ur server is not going to break and browsers are just powerful enough to handle my jquery!

This is 1:05AM and this is the 3rd time I start over my question to Stack Overflow because I don't know what the fuck is going on with jQuery UI, and when I finally get it, Google finds me both the question and the answer of the same and only dude that had the same problem than me FIVE FUCKING YEARS AGO and he couldn't solve it.

Fuck this, tomorrow I'll start over with VueJS.

dat feeling when you code a chunk of a page for 15mins and then you test it for an hour and a half cause you cant believe there's no bug or unhandled error

I wanted to add a simple gallery for our website.
I started browsing open source alternatives.
Result: "Depens on jquery, depends on node, depends on bla bla bla... Fuck it... I'l just make one myself."

Just found this great JQuery selector in a bit of code a freelancer wrote:

var showErrorFor = $('[name="newPass"]').attr('name')

Re-Factoring old code and i find this beauty

$('.modal [name="port"]').attr('name')

That moment when you're working on a website and all of the sudden the site (on localhost) stops working, you don't understand why, and then you realize you're offline :/, your site uses Jquery for everything (And because you're lazy, you didn't downloaded it... and you never will).

Overhears colleague say 'Ohh there's a plugin for that'. Few weeks later i find the dumb fuck added it to the codebase and not use the dependency manager. I'd happily shoot the senior Dev who peer reviewed it but looks like this pleb merged straight in!

With a codebase overflowing with duplicate frameworks and unused jquery plugins I'll be burning the god damn place down come next week!

Steve Jobs

looks up JavaScript question, gets jQuery answer

Are you kidding me? Does anyone even do plain JS anymore?? D:

Wanting to animate an arrow turning.
Has jQuery and thinks of. animate().
Spends 2 hours wondering why it won't rotate.
Reads in smallprint "jQuery doesn't support CSS3 animations."
There goes the time I didn't have -_-

jQuery is funnnn

So how my Valentines Day went you ask?

Okay so it started to study more jQuery for my Graduation Project (I am an Apprentice for Software Development) since we're already using jQuery on the Frontend.

I literally spent 1/2 Day of debugging a bloody checkbox because its value didn't change and i never worked with JS / jQuery at all.

So basically what i did was this little if/else if/else thingy:

if($(this).is(':checkbox') && $(this).is(':checked'))
{ (...) }
else if($(this).is(':checkbox') && !$(this).is(':checked')) { (...) }
else { (...) }

I am so disgusted by this, but i don't think that there is any better way of doing it, since i dynamically get specific jQuery elements via selector.

Yeah, the rest of the day i actually implemented the feature regarding to that checkbox (which worked first try btw!)

And yeah, literally had no Date, Girl nor anyone waiting home for me and cuddles with me :(

Which method do you guys prefer?
$("#test") or $('#test')

Anybody else really dislike jQuery coding standards? Like who decided $ was a nice & informative variable name?

They were right, jQuery is 1000 times smoother to use than typical DOM manipulation 😍

Question: Why did the jQuery developer never have financial problems?
Answer: Because he was in $.noConflict() mode

Working on a big project with lots of legacy code and terrible code. Full of jewels like this:

$('.form-item-to input').parent().removeClass('isOpen');

Man... .form-item-to IS the immediate, direct and only parent of the only input child!!!

Friend: Why use Vue JS or Angular? I know JQuery, It's simple and it does what that does..

var jQuery=$= { };
$("#username").val("")

"Why isn't jQuery working?!?!"

some days are very frustrating , i had a task today in which client want a page where he can add bulk of car details on the same page.
now jquery fucked me.
I want to do something to release stress. Why do I get stuck at shitty problems sometimes ?
Damn I'm a noob programmer

It literally haunts me that I've used jQuery in a reactjs project, I'm not saying that jQuery is bad but using it does not seems right, I can't sleep, always thinking about a solution, fml

When something unexpectedly not working on the website and your boss told you to ask a help from the host company (GoDaddy) to fix the issue in the codes.

All you need is ASP, bootstrap and JQuery.UI

</irony>

So, my favourite language is Python, and for web developing I use Pyramid, and to stay in my "comfort zone" I use brython for client scripting, don't take me wrong, I love javascript, but for just a bit of performance lost I like being able to use all my pre-existing python code if I need to...
So, this was my first work experience, for a military industry, we had to make a service for uploading big files and sending them via email.
I heard one thing that shot me out of my "comfort zone" (I'll call it cf from now on)... "Use php"...
So, I already had written in php and I've always disliked it, perl-ish and broken as a bethesda game (i like bethesda games, but they are broken)
Another thing: javascript vanilla or jquery, never liked jquery either, so I decided to use vanilla js...
So, after 6 months of work, my partner and I finished it...
Well, more than one year later that mess we had to make to satisfy our boss' most absurd desires is not online yet, I search it on google every month, so yeah, 6 months of my life wasted (also, it was a "stage", so not only I didn't get any recognition, but they didn't give me any money)

Interview: "what is ur favorite line of code? And why?"

Me: "$.ajax coz it's pretty"

Oh my God!... WHY?

So another infamous code (or smart code) you decide, there's class 'error' in the template/html and here this genius is removing it and adding it back? is this even logical at any level,

I mean just hide() and show() would do the job

I never really understood why jQuery gets all the hate it does? Can anyone tell me about it?

Ugh I hate jQuery. It's so bloated, and I can do everything I need without it. But I can't get rid of it cause WordPress absolutely needs it.

At least I can pretend it doesn't exist on my personal projects.

Do I need jQuery to use that?

So todays issue. Working with slideshow functionality with jQuery and setInterval() and things seem to be working as expected.

That is.. until you leave the page for awhile and come back and see a constant fading of images because the intervals appear to be "catching up" with themselves xD

Luckily, setTimeout() takes care of this issue nicely.

Why are you all so obsessed with hating jQuery? For me it just does the job done. Animate stuff. But I agree being totally dependant on javascript is bad for any website. Seen hundreds of wordpress spaghetti code where fancy effects were made with jquery like CSS opacity 0 and jquery animate to 1... What a bullshit. But yeah I still love jquery. Easy, fast and reliable.

Working with jquery:

When I was there, all was perfect.

Came from vaykay, nothing works!! In my comments it said, DONT NOT CHANGE ANY `${anyNastyWord}` CLASS NAME!!!

seriously guys, dont you believe jquery should have been queryjs ?

But I know jQuery

Why do people hate jQuery so much? 30KB is basically nothing in times of modern bandwidth and for me CSS selectors are mich more readable than the Vanilla JS functions.
Im not judging and would be happy if someone explains it to me or shows better alternatives.