Don't understand USB storage?
Well here it is, in a nutshell -

When you discover the business platform your company is currently migrating all their sites into emails your password to you when you request a reset.

meIRL

Render issues IRL

For those who don't know
typeof NaN is number

!rant
400 Nerf bullets just arrived... Office is gonna become a war zone...

Me Visiting a new location...

*Device found a new wi-fi signal:
worldsMostSecureRouter

*Enter password:
worldsMostSecureRouter123

*Authorizing...
*Obtaining IP address
*Connected

My girlfriend comes in and sees me on devrant.

GF: "What is that app? I see you using it all the time. Is it like an endless blog with updates?"
Me: "It's kinda like facebook. But for developers. And you don't have any friends".
GF: "That seems like a sad app"

Many years ago, I wrote an app for a company to provision users in AD and Exchange. It disabled 10k users and no one could work. Good times.

Finally, I've upgraded my processor. From single core 2.2 to ... wait for it ... dual core 2.7!!!!!!!!!!! Hooray

At the top of a 2000+ line source file

Meanwhile in Production ...

I guess it's a bad rant…

Favourite Programming Quote - Whats yours?

"A computer is a stupid machine with the ability to do incredibly smart things, while computer programmers are smart people with the ability to do incredibly stupid things." - Bill Bryson

devRant I want you to meet Stressy the Stressball.

What did you name yours?

First spam email: $120,000
Second spam email: $160,000

Waiting for the third spam email 😎

😂😂😂😂😂😂

So I picked up my nephew from his kindergarten and he told me that forks have round holes.
I laughed and said that forks don't have holes, otherwise the food would fall down through them.

It turs out that he was right and I was wrong.

At the ending part of the interview, I asked a final question to the HR.

Me: "So, what language is mostly used here?"

HR: "Since we're dealing with customers from different countries, English."

I like going to random Google subdomains. Today I had a typo when seeing where "timer.google.com" goes, but I later learned I had a made a typo, and typed "timex." Well, looks like a great time to buy a watch.

I can't see an end, I have no control and I don't think there's an escape - I don't even have a home anymore
.
.
.
Definitely time for a new keyboard

Today.

Last night someone detonated an improvised nail bomb at a concert venue in downtown Manchester. 22 dead and 59 injured (many life threatening).

I'm working from home as my home is listed as a safe haven.

I'm not sure how much, if any, work I'll get done.

If you're in Manchester and need anything let me know.

It's all very much process:

Check everyone I know is ok
List house as safe space
Buy food
Keep passing information around to those who need it

No real time to think about it, just stay in the "response" mode.

The day my company got its first round of funding

How to piss off a developer?

1) Make your SDK bundled with an IDE and provide no way to update only the SDK, forcing them to loose all of their IDE settings and customizations.

2) Make GNU tools bundled in the SDK that are compiled 10 years ago and haven't been updated.

3) Provide a Linux version of the SDK, but only save all files in Windows-style line endings.

4) Provide SDKs that introduce bugs and break builds.

5) ???

6) Profit!

Watching Rick & Morty while patching in production helps not to go crazy.

Not me, but a colleague of mine ordered 10,000 pens with <company>.com printed on them - but our company had a .org address.

10 points for next century option.

Anyone been through this?

Trying to learn how to program a programming language.

My brain.

Is React really that good? Some say if you don't know React you are doing JS wrong. But everyone says that for everything.

Boss: I need you to start on this new project, how long will it take?

Me: well, hard to say with no specs whatsoever...

Boss: just your best guess

Me: 4 to 6 month I guess?

Boss: so 3 months it is. When can you start?

Me: no specs, sir...and I said 4 to 6

Boss: the specs are almost ready, I know you can simplify it

Me: ...

Boss: just start with the basic infrastructure already

(4 months later)

Boss: here you are the specs, they might change a little in behaviour and design, but all the main stuff is here

(Hands me a A3 with a total of 21 pictures in InDesign)

Me: o....Kay. what happens when I click here?

Boss: oh, we should still talk about the app workflow, I'll get you updated

(2 weeks and 16 total rewrites of the "specs" later)

Boss: you told me it was a 2 months job, why aren't you finished yet? We must deploy in 3 weeks!

Me: ...