Why you do this devRant!!

Hehehehe

It's so annoying! One of the developers just started explaining to me some of the recent changes in the infrastructure. I made these changes! I know about them and can explain them better than he did. I tried telling him that I already know but he just wouldn't stop. It felt like he was mansplaining. I don't usually get that at work so it was weird and frustrating.

Sometimes I wonder whether it's unhealthy for my desk plant that I explain her my code.

Me and my wife are software engineers
Started dating while doing a project together
I guess you could say that we...
MERGED WITHOUT CONFLICTS

Friend: So you're a programmer? You must be good in hacking WiFis and sht.
Me: Uhm..
Friend: Can you hack my PayPal account using HTML?
Me: Say no more.

I code, drink, and from Java (yes it's an actual place). Except my life doesn't run on JVM. Or does it?

I am from the future and Php takes over everything

There are two kinds of developers in this world:
Those that finish the project they started, and

Our college has PC's with Pentium Core 2 Duo processors and 1 GB RAM. We are made to code Java on windows using default notepad and cmd. There's nothing more infuriating than that.

Me: Ma'am, can we use any IDE for our mini project or finals?

She: No kid, you can't just use that. This is code you have to write it.

Me: Wut?

Dumb clients make me consider smoking and or alcoholism

If only I had a job to rant about...😭

`grey` is darker than `darkgrey`
(#808080 vs #a9a9a9)

gg CSS

I love how my laptop crashed twice in less than 30 minutes.

I thought is was the shit load of windows.

But it was a driver problem.

;)

Stay in school kids

!Rant

So the interns tried to 3d print a rubberduck and it got stuck mid way.

Guess i have a coding duck now
I call her "Detached HEAD state"

isLucky = true;

I have my own secret script hidden in a /batcave dir on the production servers. It fixes everything the other devs usually manage to screw up.
I call it Batman.bat

Group projects make me realise why Batman works alone.

*Reads some text about frequencies
"Oh, bass is within 40-100hz. How does it sound?"
*Clicks on demo audio*
*Table trembles*
*Cat jumps high and runs off*
*Pauses audio*
"Yup, that's bass"

void procrastinate()
{
//TODO: implement
}