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Aboutdev
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Skillsios, android, wpf, node, react/react native
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LocationNovosibirsk
Joined devRant on 7/18/2017
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"Sooo, children of the village, what are we going to write front-end in?" - I said to my infant students.
"Typescript with ts-loader/awesometypescript loader for webpack" - simultaneously yelled the kids.
"Exactly! Brilliant! And now, what are we going to be writing back-end in?" - asked I then.
The kids yelled: "PHP 7.2 with Laravel, or Go with Gingonic and juliensmith/httprouter, or Typescript without loader, with express/koa"
Truly stunned with their excellence, I asked "Well, now you 100% ain't gonna get it right - what are we going to be writing a desktop application that doesn't require a lot of native functionality and preferably, cross-platform in?" And the kids didn't hesitate to yell happily "Typescript targeting Electron", which has only brought tear to my eye.
"A native ms windows app?" "WPF under C#"
"A native gtk app?" "Vala"
"A native KDE/XFCE app?" "Cpp/Qt"
"A native mac app?" "Swift3.2/4"
I was in tears, just thinking about what future these kids have, but suddenly I have noticed one of kids seemed puzzled. It was Pajeet, an indian guy, ugh, his mom was a bitch. I asked him "What is wrong, little acoustic?" "But I like Java, and I would like to make back-end with Tomcat!" he replied. "Ooooh :3" cutely I moaned, trying to reach the handle of the table locker "I've got something just for you". I pulled out a rope, with sewed-in spikes, covered in drool and piss, came up to Pajeet and tenderly put it around his neck, making a knot. Pajeet fell under the table, and I got fired.8 -
I am getting so triggered over kids that post about how they want to program in java and laugh about their CS teachers teaching them old c++8
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make let not var
Other devranters:
LOL
MOAR
OHAHAHAHAH
OMG SO FUNNY
me:
make: *** No rule to make target `let'. Stop.7 -
assert(!thisRant.aboutProgramming())
So I was chatting a girl for a long time, bla bla, met a lot, recently she told me she doesn't like me no more as she used to.
Fuck it, lived through this mental meltdown, chatting on, meming, having fun times. I at some point got sentimental and wrote "it's a shame you don't like me no more"
She took it personally, told me that it was not a pleasant message to recieve, questioning if I am not accusing her of being guilty in all my problems.
Now, English is my mother tongue, but I need halp to figure out what exactly can be here offensive? It's literally saying "it's saddening that you explicitly don't like me anymore"
P.S. i might be just a despicable person, I do not exclude this option5 -
Best way to learn 'X' (and X11 too, if you see what I mean :))
1) shitpost on DevRant about how much 'X' is better than Java
2) read the official docs1 -
Sydochen has posted a rant where he is nt really sure why people hate Java, and I decided to publicly post my explanation of this phenomenon, please, from my point of view.
So there is this quite large domain, on which one or two academical studies are built, such as business informatics and applied system engineering which I find extremely interesting and fun, that is called, ironically, SAD. And then there are videos on youtube, by programmers who just can't settle the fuck down. Those videos I am talking about are rants about OOP in general, which, as we all know, is a huge part of studies in the aforementioned domain. What these people are even talking about?
Absolutely obvious, there is no sense in making a software in a linear pattern. Since Bikelsoft has conveniently patched consumers up with GUI based software, the core concept of which is EDP (event driven programming or alternatively, at least OS events queue-ing), the completely functional, linear approach in such environment does not make much sense in terms of the maintainability of the software. Uhm, raise your hand if you ever tried to linearly build a complex GUI system in a single function call on GTK, which does allow you to disregard any responsibility separation pattern of SAD, such as long loved MVC...
Additionally, OOP is mandatory in business because it does allow us to mount abstraction levels and encapsulate actual dataflow behind them, which, of course, lowers the costs of the development.
What happy programmers are talking about usually is the complexity of the task of doing the OOP right in the sense of an overflow of straight composition classes (that do nothing but forward data from lower to upper abstraction levels and vice versa) and the situation of responsibility chain break (this is when a class from lower level directly!! notifies a class of a higher level about something ignoring the fact that there is a chain of other classes between them). And that's it. These guys also do vouch for functional programming, and it's a completely different argument, and there is no reason not to do it in algorithmical, implementational part of the project, of course, but yeah...
So where does Java kick in you think?
Well, guess what language popularized programming in general and OOP in particular. Java is doing a lot of things in a modern way. Of course, if it's 1995 outside *lenny face*. Yeah, fuck AOT, fuck memory management responsibility, all to the maximum towards solving the real applicative tasks.
Have you ever tried to learn to apply Text Watchers in Android with Java? Then you know about inline overloading and inline abstract class implementation. This is not right. This reduces readability and reusability.
Have you ever used Volley on Android? Newbies to Android programming surely should have. Quite verbose boilerplate in google docs, huh?
Have you seen intents? The Android API is, little said, messy with all the support libs and Context class ancestors. Remember how many times the language has helped you to properly orient in all of this hierarchy, when overloading method declaration requires you to use 2 lines instead of 1. Too verbose, too hesitant, distracting - that's what the lang and the api is. Fucking toString() is hilarious. Reference comparison is unintuitive. Obviously poor practices are not banned. Ancient tools. Import hell. Slow evolution.
C# has ripped Java off like an utter cunt, yet it's a piece of cake to maintain a solid patternization and structure, and keep your code clean and readable. Yet, Cs6 already was okay featuring optionally nullable fields and safe optional dereferencing, while we get finally get lambda expressions in J8, in 20-fucking-14.
Java did good back then, but when we joke about dumb indian developers, they are coding it in Java. So yeah.
To sum up, it's easy to make code unreadable with Java, and Java is a tool with which developers usually disregard the patterns of SAD. -
I sexually identify as Objective-C
I actually would love to write everything in objective c
Even my node/react applications7 -
Something happened to my internetz now streaming is very slow. Git works fine, but I stopped wanking and watching youtube.
I'm not complaining1 -
How to make all of source code files of an Android application fit inside the Android Studio window?
Rewrite it in Kotlin with Anko Commons *lenny face*6 -
So my worst experience with a project manager was this:
New changes to the system came in, and i was the developer of android frontend back then
So he's shouting at me like 'why is dis so slow, why deez delayed, why those render misaligned on the orbitrary tablet, etc.'
So we finish in like an hour, he walk away back to his office, I went to smoke, came back, oh hey, I wanna go to the toilet
And back then at that place we had a small one person WC, so when someone was there, anyone else would have to stand outside the cabin
So I come next to it, oh, fuck, occupied, and I hear ridiculously loud and echo-y splashes of pure solid shit hitting the water surface)
A min later the thunderstorm was over, the door opens, and my PM rushes out, sees me, stops (I was in his way) and gives me a deathstare for a quick second. Awkward moment's over, he walks around me, but I just could not keep my mouth shut, so I said aloud
"Well, no wonder" -
Bark OS X
Barkosoft
Bark Gates
PHBark
Larabark
Bark.js
XBark
Kanbark
Body-barker
BARK.NET
Linux Bark
Elebarkary OS
sudo apt-bark install
MySQBark
Rebarx
iBark
Deadbark
Backbark
Bark-up
Road & Track: The Need for Bark
XBark One
Bark Station 4
Unbark Engine
C-bark
Objective-Bark
Sbark (Slack, okay this one's a stretch)
StackOverbark
Daft Bark - Motherbark (listening to it right now)
EBark
Counter-Bark
NBARK
Abark
Hewlett - Barkard
Huabark
Barkdroid, of course
Xamabark
BarkScript
Logibark
AMBark
Alright, back to work :)14 -
Why do people even care to get Microsoft Developer Certificates?
Like, getting Indian citizenship is a little bit faster..2 -
Am I the only one who got a fabulous butthurt about Visual Studio for Mac being just a rebrand of Xamarin Studio, and inherently, Mono Develop?1
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Me and my wife are software engineers
Started dating while doing a project together
I guess you could say that we...
MERGED WITHOUT CONFLICTS21