Can totally relate to this

Debugging comments be like...

TLDR : I left a company which doesn't understand the concept of email id and passwords.

Me (trying to login to the alumni website) *no register user option*

Customer support - you've to click on forgot password to create an account.
Me - Wonderful

*clicks on reset password*
*enters employee id, name, email, father's name, DOB, date of joining , date of leaving, current city because apparently if I just enter my employee id it is as if they never knew me. Sigh*
*your password will be sent to your email id*

Me - okay. *waits for two weeks because I assumed someone will manually go and create my account and email me, considering the state of system. *

After two weeks,

Me - I still haven't received my password on email after I created my account. Can you please check?

After one week,

Customer support - you need to click on forget password if you forgot your password.

Me - *inventing new curse words* I have not forgot my password, I never received it in the first place!

After one week,
Customer support - yes you'll receive your password on your email id.

Me - *runs out of curse words* seriously dude?
* proceeds to reset password*
System - your password has been reset. Your new password will be sent to your email id. *apparently anyone can reset passwords if you have the employee id, which is an integer*

After a week

Me - Am I going to ever receive the password? I've tried generating passwords, resetting my password. I never get my passwords. What should I do!!

Customer support - yes you need to click on Forgot password.

Me - are you fucking kidding me!!!
You fuckers need to be fired and replaced by a FAQ page which has no question and just a single answer, because a peanut has higher IQ than you. For any questions you may have, just reset password. Goddammit idiots!
Also, which email id are you sending my passwords to?

Customer support - myname@oldcompany.com

Me - you do realize that this is the alumni website for the company. Alumni means ex members.
Being ex members, you can assume we don't have access to our company email ids obviously?

Customer support - yes.

Me - how am I supposed to get the password using my old email id then?

Customer support - you need to click on forgot password option.

I think I should probably move to the Himalayas for my anger management issues. Plus it'll be probably easier to throw idiots off a mountain.

Shared screen with a client over Skype. Showed them in Postman that their API wasn't working as expected. It was expecting a json. Instead it was giving error code 400 instead of 200.
Message :
"Error: No error. All OK"

I'll never forget the words of the client:

"Don't use all this fancy software, you don't know how to call APIs, open Internet Explorer or chrome and paste it in the bar. You'll see All OK, means all is okay."

*insert you dense mf meme here*

Hired a new backend Dev. He writes a script and sends it for testing...
Tester: "It's not working..."
Backend Dev: Goes to Mongo and deletes the tester's whole profile...

I cant control my laughter every time I remember this incident...He claimed it was a mistake, I don't think that it was a mistake...the tester had it coming...
"It's not working" that's all he says every time...I mean at least give me something to start with...!

Modern web development is fucked. Just absolutely, totally screwed up.

I want to create a simple to do list web app. Look for a tutorial: "OK guys, this is really easy, it just takes five minutes."

First step, install these:
- Git
- NPM
- NodeJS
- Express
- MongoDB
- Docker
- React

Second step, npm install about one million modules. Don't question what they do or why they're there.

Before you know it, six hours have passed and you've got a code base of 3GB and you haven't even _started_ on your app.

FUCK that shit! I can create this web app with Internet Explorer and Notepad.

.na .na .na .na .na .na

Boss - gives tasks to me. Timeline: 10 days.

Me - work hard and finish the solution in 3 days.

Boss- wtf is this. Do it properly.

Me - chills for 15 days. Submit the same earlier solution after that.

Boss - yes this looks nice now! Much better than your earlier work!

Me - dude seriously what kind of stuff do you smoke before coming to work?

She - So. Do you read ?

Me - Yes. Infact a lot. Daily. My life is filled with it.

She - Wow. Nice. So what do you read mostly ? Which one is your favourite

Me - Mostly Documentations. Vuejs documentation is my favourite followed by express and mongodb documentation. And yeah webpack. You should read them too. Then there is a book on ES6, 'Understanding ES6' by Nikolas S Zakas, famous author and programmer. Great stuff

"Occasionally stores something" 😂

Tldr :
Office Building : 1
Population: 5000
Number of PC users: 5000
No of Spare mice: 0

Day 1:
Training period commences.
My mouse laser sensor doesn't work.

Solution: Use this mouse to log in to your system.
Open the company portal.
Connect to vpn.
Enter username password.
Create a ticket for mouse replacement.
Done.

Day 3
I bring my own mouse.
Confiscated at security.
Becomes a security violation.

Day 9
I get a call from helpdesk.
Agent- what is the problem?
Me- my mouse is not working.
Agent- why?
Me- what do you mean? Something is wrong with the sensor.
Agent- clean the sensor.
Disconnects call.
Marks ticket as resolved.
Me- WTF just happened!

Naturally, I escalate the issue.

Day 15
Level 2 Agent- what happened? Why have you escalated the issue?
Me- I need a mouse, waiting since 2 weeks.
Him- No mouse is available
Me- you don't have a single spare mouse available in an office with 5000 PC users?
Him- no they're out of stock.
Me- when will it be back in stock?
Him- we will 'soon' launch a tender for quotations from sellers.
Me- time?
Him- 1 week.

Day 34

I email the head of supplies for the city office. Next day I get a used super small mouse, which doesn't have a left button. Anyways, I've given up hope now.

Day 45
I become a master at keyboard shortcuts.
Finish my training.
Get transferred to another city.
No mouse till date.

Surprisingly, this was one of the top recruiters in my country. Never knew, MNCs can be so so inefficient for such simple tasks.
Start-ups are way better in this regard. Latest tech, small community, minimal bureaucracy and a lot of respect and things to learn.

I swear all my clients are like these! I can probably teach a blind monkey faster than these idiots.

PC: marketoonist

A Java Development vacancy I came across today:

Requirements:

Must:

° Appropriate Education
° Work Experience with Java/Javascript knowledge, at least 2 years, good understanding of OOP, patterns
° Experience with Spring, NoSQL(MongoDB)

Preferably:

° Experience with Tomcat/Jboss/Glassfish
° JDBC, JSF, JSP, JSTL, Angular, ExtJS
° HTML5, CSS3, XML, Jquery, Bootstrap, Primefaces
° Hibernate
° Git/SVN

Objective:

° Implementation of specific requirements
° Cooperation with business analytics and clarification of reuirements
° Participation in the development of application architecture and technology selection

Who are they hiring?

Ex-Boss (62years old)- why do you wear a watch? Take it off.

Me (bewildered) - why? What happened?

Him - see I don't wear a watch also.
Come on, take it off.

Me - *took off my watch* now what?

Him - see. Now you can also look at the time using your mobile, like me. No need of watch. U should be modern.

Me- *WTF. Are u high or something, u fucking insane asshole? *
He was one weird piece of shit.

Useless Google Shortener API.
It allows 1M requests per day.
But has a max rate limit of 1 request/second. There are 86400 seconds in a day. Why are you giving a 1M requests limit then?

Maybe aliens haven't visited our solar system because we have one star...they would probably be looking for systems with 4 or 5 stars rating.

Well, a job offer valid for Charles Babbage.

I wonder if those people who give unwarranted useless advice to developers go to their doctors and do the same thing.

- Doc, just make a small slit, take out old heart, put in a new one, connect everything back as before and stitch it. Easy peasy. Shouldn't take more than a few minutes.
- my leg is fractured. Just open it and tape it back. It is a hack job, but it'll make the client happy for now. It will be quickly done.
- I think I have cancer. Just write a script to kill it. Shouldn't be too difficult.

Fuckers.

Coming up next: MongoDB vs Docker

After working with some clients, I've stopped believing cavemen are extinct.

Day 1 10:00 am
Login to email account (Zimbra)
Your password is incorrect (I entered it correctly, this was a permanent issue ,used to happen in the company with many employees)
Reset your password by logging into internal company portal.

11:00 am
Logged into company portal, somehow. 2 Mbps internet shared among 104 people, you can imagine the speed.
Reset email password
* your password has been sent to your email id*
Are you fucking kidding me? U have emailed me the password to the same email I can't log in to?
Where did the architecture designer get this top notch weed from?

Day 2
Asked HR to reset my password (using a colleague's email)

Day 3
No reply from HR yet

Day 4
I went to meet HR, she's on vacation. So they have 1 person managing the password reset, for 5000 people with no backup person. Cool.

Day 5
Your internal company password has expired. Check your email for link to create new password. This is some next level shit going on.

Day 6
I called up Internal IT team to generate a new email for me.
They asked me to raise a ticket.
I can't raise a ticket because the only way to do so, is through the portal.

Day 7
Nothing. Btw, personal email and all social networks were banned. You can't even open stackoverflow.
And this was a research lab, amazing huh?

Day 8
Loss of pay for 4 days since I can't login to company portal to fill timesheet.

Day 9
HR comes back. Resets my password.
I try to generate my new password for portal.
The password policy:
Password can't be same as last 10 passwords
Passwords expire every week
8 characters minimum, 2 upper case, 2 lower case, NO SPECIAL SYMBOL. WTF. How long do u think its gonna take to crack that?

Fuckers had a company wise policy to automatically lock PC every 1 min if not used. Who the fuck can keep on using it continuously! I'm reading an article, and bam ! Locked. 2 wrong entries and that's it, repeat all steps again. Fuckers really didn't want to let me do my job, just keep on logging in all day.

Uncle- What do you do?

Me- I'm a software engineer

Uncle- My brother's friend's son is also a software engineer.

Me- (so what am I supposed to do about it?) yes that's nice

Uncle- I have a great idea, u should implement, I'm just telling you, it is a revolutionary idea

Me- (oh fuck, not again) yes tell

Uncle- you should make a matrimonial site which tracks what people do on internet and tell their to-be-spouses about it

Me - (yeah, I'll get sued for breach of privacy, and it has got nothing to do with my current line of work, and will probably cause divorces before marriage) yes great idea uncle

Uncle- see I told you this billion dollar idea, u should do hard work and make it

Just WHY in god's name do all uncles think laptop is a magic box in which I just have to type their idea in and it will spit out a website/software in 2 minutes. I don't go around advising them about their line of work.

Your resume:
Git
SSL
Vue
Angular
React
Node
Spring boot
MySQL
MongoDb
HTML
CSS
Java
Javascript
Bootstrap
Cassandra
Hive
Hadoop
Block chain
GraphQL
Kubernetics
Jenkins
Azure
GCP

Interviewer:
Sorry, we need someone who knows AWS

I wonder if Bill Gates actually wants to donate someone money, will it still end up in spam.

Some Romanian "Hacker" is trying to hack my forum xD

He tried to call the setup script for PhpMyAdmin, but I don't even have PhpMyAdmin installed because I use MongoDB xDDD

I'm lying on the floor laughing

At an interview, the first round was an online coding round. Two questions, one easy one hard, 90 minutes, easy peasy.

I solved the hard one first.
A bit of good logic, followed MVC pattern, all done. Worked flawlessly.
Submitted code. Online compiler threw up an internal error citing java is an invalid command(jdk not found).
Called the invigilators. What I heard next, I couldn't believe this shit.
"We're not responsible for any errors you may be having. Figure it out yourself"
I was like WTF dude. This is not even a compilation or runtime error!
After a heated discussion, I made him look at the code.
Him - what is all this classes and all? Why haven't you written everything inside the main function?
Me - those are model classes. Those are different helper functions. That is a recursive function to avoid 5 for loops and use divide and conquer. Ever heard of OOP? what kind of person writes a 300 line program inside one function?
Him - no no we write it like that only. Correct this.
Me - I fit everything inside the main function. Still the same error, java not installed. Called the idiot to have a look at it.
Him - yeah your code is wrong.
Me - may I know what's wrong with it? Can you fix it please?
Him - no no we aren't allowed to see the code (he had already read it twice. It was compiling and running perfectly, locally) .
Yeah you solved only 1 problem, you were supposed to solve 2.
Me - yes because the rest of the time I had the pleasure of your company. (It isn't everyday that I see talking buffoons.)

True story.

Asking for donations via terminal is a thing? Programmer thing 😎

The Adventures of my Project Manager.
--- Part 1

a little back story first:
-----------------------------
The project manager is the CEO's younger brother.
-----------------------
end of back story.

PM: Hey, we should stop using Nodejs on our API.
ME: Why?
PM: I don't see why it is necessary when we could make our android app talk directly with MongoDB.
.................
ME: QUE?!

Dear recruiters,
if you are looking for

- Java,Python, PHP
- React,Angular
- PostgreSQL, Redis, MongoDB
- AWS, S3, EC2, ECS, EKS
- *nix system administration
- Git and CI with TDD
- Docker, Kubernetes

That's not a Full Stack Developer
That’s an entire IT department

Yours truly #stolen

So, the HR has made it mandatory to fill a Google form,
fill in info about yourself (name, employee ID),
your family (name, address),
and select radio buttons for symptoms like fever,cough, cold.

You must fill this form DAILY, and if you miss filling the google form, it will be Loss of pay for whole day.

Yes, so if I have contracted coronavirus, and am running a high fever, first thing I'll do is login, open a shitty ass google form and select a bunch of stupid radio buttons.

And if I'm not ill, I'll still go and fill this form every single day.

Because fuck logic.

At one of my previous companies, there was a guy, let's call him X.
X was the ideal employee.
X used to come to office at 8.
X used to go to sleep in AC office.
X used to wake up at 10 when everyone started coming in.
X used to play Uno and Pokemon Go till 6.
X was a master in Uno and Pokemon Go.
X used to wait till 8 to get free cab facility.
X didn't do one single productive piece of shit whole day.

My boss loved X Because he came early and left late.
My boss didn't give a damn if that person even switched on his laptop or not.
My boss didn't care about productivity.
I didn't come on time and didn't leave on time (I travelled in non-traffic hours)
I slogged my ass off because I really wanted to learn.
My boss scolded me, asked to be like X.
This was the last straw.
I resigned the next day.

I never wanted to be like X. Seeing him daily, motivated me so much.
When I worked, I focussed on it, I didn't keep checking the clock waiting for it to hit 5 pm.
I aimed for productivity, set realistic targets and always achieved them, no matter what.
My boss was an a--hole. I met X and Boss recently. Both are still in the same role, just scraping through.
Felt really good that I worked hard and have achieved something in life ^_^

Arrived today, hyped!

I have real-world experience with MongoDB, MySQL, Firebase, and caching with Redis.

A colleague in ops recommended this book a while back and I thought I'd give it a whirl to better understand what other options I have available.

That awkward moment when I was able to run three docker containers on a 512MB server:
1. DotNet core web service
2. MySQL
3. OpenVPN

BUT I cannot run:
1. NodeJs web service
2. MongoDB container

Spent two hours configuring the damn server to get hit by this T_T

I always thought that this could only happen with big orgs with precious data. One of my coworkers sent me this last night

MongoDB: Snapchat for databases.

Client reads about MomgoDB ransomware attacks online.

Him: I heard that the MongoDB is not secure, we should use something else in our system.
Me: Those databases got attacked because security features were turned off. If you want you can have an external security team to test the system when it's done.
Him: I don't wana take any risk, so I we should use something else.

We have been working on this system for almost a year and the final stage was supposed to be delivered in a month.

He wants me to replace it with MySQL

At 4pm, after 6 hours of work of migrating from mysql to mongodb...
I am drinking coffee with my team.
Boss, comes from somewhere and asks...

what do you all want? (What he meant was, go back to work you all)

One of my team member- (angry and agitated) says-- a comfortable sofa.

Holy fuck, i laughed my ass out.

Guess what happend next...

Made a simple college project using Node.Js, MongoDB, React... Wrote everything from scratch, starting from HTML to CSS and Routes even OAuth. No template was used.. Guess what teacher said...

She said I love the second project made using wordpress template because, "It looks amazing and beautiful"

One of the reasons why I hate college...

Schrödinger's warranty

I resigned today 😍
No more dealing with shit architecture and experimental beta technologies being used in production which went down constantly 😎
Back to good ol' product development! 🤩
One month notice period to go

Why are all my classmates building their web applications in PHP for our thesis? I know it's used a lot but for smaller projects there's tons of better ways to build a web application. Besides myself and another guy in this class (I'm using Java and mongoDB, he's working in ASP.NET and Microsoft SQL), nobody else wants to use something different. We only did PHP in one class so this seriously can't be the only language 2/3rd's the class knows.

Oh God it probably is.

When you're searching the missing parenthesis of your MongoDB query 😂😂😂

At the company I worked for earlier, they'd blocked two USB ports citing security policies. The third USB, was unblocked because the system admin didn't know a laptop can have more than 2 USBs .
Gigabit LAN was open.
They just wanted you to copy stuff at higher speed, I think.
If you think blocking a couple of USB ports is going to stop a dev from copying data, well either you're unbearably stupid, or think too less of your devs. It is just gonna hinder their productivity, nothing else.

I swear I'm going to punch the next mf who asks me to hack FB.

„I have secured our mongodb by setting the dbpath deeper than 20 folders by using more than 256 chars. To protect us from windows hacker boys.“

😂

Age++;

!rant
Linux vs Microsoft

Well, this war is certainly one of the oldest. IMO,
Linux - great for automating stuff, free, and customisable.
Windows - user friendly, softwares much more easily available, much easier to use.

Frankly, I have tried using Linux a lot of times, but never liked it one bit. I am a GUI fan and hate to type commands for every little thing. Plus installing Ubuntu wiped out my disk once and I lost all my school memories ( this was in 2008, I didn't know much about backups, was quite young) ,so I am quite vary of it. I just don't feel it to be intuitive. Just to do a simple task, I loathe to learn difficult commands, and just read the syntax.

However, I have no bias against people who use Linux.

It is like religion, live and let live, follow whatever suits you.

On devrant, why's there so much hate for Windows? Because it is paid? Because it has updates? So what!
I never had a problem with it, I update once a month, takes 10 mins. If you set up your active hours correctly, it works great, you can disable updates also. Windows 10 is highly stable. It is paid, but in my country almost all laptops come with windows preinstalled. The OS-less laptops are about $10 cheaper, which is not that much to freak about.

Would love to hear your views and logical arguments.
Please be polite.

Doesn't seem so bad to me...

Well, fuck. The CTO of our startup decided to migrate data of our hundred thousand customers from a stable functioning platform to an in-house unstable platform with severe performance issues, to "save" costs, despite our repeated requests. He made us not have any contingency plans because he wanted to "motivate" us to complete the migration.

Result- we have a thousand customers reporting major issues daily, which is causing loss of revenue to both us and them. The company ran out of funding. Most of the team members were fired. And he's expecting the rest of us to magically fix everything. Dunno what kind of office politics is this, in which you're sabotaging Your Own company.

Looking for a new job now to get out of this hellhole. I really used to love this company. Feels sad to see it ruined like this.

Why the fuck didn't I start to learn mongodb sooner 😶

I love it already!

That moment when the practical work supervisor don't understand why you don't use netbeans because he thinks that MongoDB is a netbeans plugin.

Wrote angular service, named it "MongoService", handles calls/requests to mongodb. Spent an hour wondering why it wasn't running one of my functions from controller. Just realized I am calling MangoService instead of Mongo. Lord help me.

Boss wants to scale our webservers because it seems they're having performance/capacity issues....

I'VE BEEN TELLING HIM FOR WEEKS IT'S NOT THE SERVERS!!! IT'S THE FACT THAT EVERY SINGLE QUERY HITS A SINGLE MONGODB... AND NO CACHE EITHER... AND THE DB CANT BE ENTIRELY LOADED INTO MEMORY AS ITS TOO BIG FOR RAM ON A SINGLE SERVER...

HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU SCALE IF EVERYTHING HAS A DEPENDENCY ON 1 NON-DISTRIBUTED DATABASE?

Friend: Hey, so what do you do?

Me: I build backend systems and apis. I work with java/mongodb. I dable into some elixir and kotlin on my free time.

Friend: Cool, can you build me an Android app?

Hey guys!
Just joined devRant! Can't wait to get more involved!
Bored in the lockdown, I built an app which lets you chat with people around you.
Its called Cyrcl!
Built in over ~40 days, I was the sole developer.
Here is the tech stack - React native for the android and ios apps, mongodb and redis for the database, nodejs for the server and aws ec2 for the hosting!
I'd love to get some feedback, or discuss some of the hacks!
- Ardy

Guys guys guys. Conversation had right just now. A PM from the company I’m freelancing for just said

“We need to move away from SQL server and shift all the data to MongoDB. I don’t want it to take more than a month tops”

Verbatim. No context. Nothing. The website is for a small time supply chain software that’s been chugging along for a decade now with spaghetti code everywhere.

How do I even respond? The other guy who works with me sent 😂😂😂 to me privately and now is offline lol wtf

That awesome moment when you're hailed as God Of Internet, and all you've done is just restart the router :D

>Get password vom dev.
>Try to connect to MongoDB.
>Had some changes in how to connect because of Kubernetes and stuff.
>Always get authentication error.
>copy password again
>stop and restart portforwarding
>wait almost 1,5h (was lunchtime) for DevOps guy
>sit next to him and ask for help
>he unhides the password and deletes two spaces...

fml

TLDR - you shouldn't expect common sense from idiots who have access to databases.

I joined a startup recently. I know startups are not known for their stable architecture, but this was next level stuff.
There is one prod mongodb server.
The db has 300 collections.
200 of those 300 collections are backups/test collections.
25 collections are used to store LOGS!! They decided to store millions of logs in a nosql db because setting up a mysql server requires effort, why do that when you've already set up mongodb. Lol 😂
Each field is indexed separately in the log.
1 collection is of 2 tb and has more than 1 billion records.
Out of the 1 billion records, 1 million records are required, the rest are obsolete. Each field has an index. Apparently the asshole DBA never knew there's something called capped collection or partial indexes.

Trying to get approval to clean up the db since 3 months, but fucking bureaucracy. Extremely high server costs plus every week the db goes down since some idiot runs a query on this mammoth collection. There's one single set of credentials for everything. Everyone from applications to interns use the same creds.
And the asshole DBA left, making me in charge of handling this shit now. I am trying to fix this but am stuck to get approval from business management. Devs like these make me feel sad that they have zero respect for their work and inability to listen to people trying to improve the system.

Going to leave this place really soon. No point in working somewhere where you are expected to show up for 8 hours, irrespective of whether you even switch on your laptop.
Wish me luck folks.

!rant
After nine months of work, my capstone project is finally coming together.

It's an audio server written in Node.JS and MongoDB. I can run it on a pi plugged into a stereo and remote control it from my phone via the web server.

PC: IG @coderhumor

What's everyone's thoughts on MongoDb. Should I learn it? What's some good use cases?

That feeling when you try to get entries from a mongodb and it doesn't put out anything, not even errors and after 4 FUCKING HOURS trying, googling and looking around on stackoverflow, you realize THAT THE PROGRAMM DIDN'T EVEN CONNECT TO THE DATABASE

That's the stupidest problem I ever had IN MY ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE

Thanks devRant, I feel better now.

Does linux suck? Imho, Yes.
A lot of the people bash windows regarding automatic restarts, updates, bsod etc.
I may be unusually lucky, but the last bsod I saw was in 2014 because of a faulty synaptics driver.

I've really tried to use linux to see what the hype is all about. Quite frankly, it sucked. The first time it wiped out all my data, I realized the value of backups. Hence I do not have a single pic of my school now, thanks to complicated ubuntu mounting.
Next is driver support. When I plug in a device, I expect it to work. I don't want to spend a day googling for drivers.
Why the fuck would I want to use a black terminal which gives me a headache. Am I in 1980? Which sadistic asshole designed vim ?
I have seen linux developers who claim to be linux experts and love linux. They take so long to do simple shit. For god's sake don't tell me there are GUI versions of linux available. I'd rather work in windows 95.
Why in the world would anyone want to use ls to see the contents of a directory! It is seriously so fucking unproductive.
I can't just download a software, click next a couple of times, and be done. No no no. I've to do sudo apt get update. Then try to find the fucking package. And if all goes well, there's always the dependency issue which is going to bite me in the ass. If google and stackoverflow go down, most linux devs will die a cruel death.

Fuck you linux.
I'm not saying windows 10 is the best, but at least I don't have to crawl through shit to use it. If you don't like automatic updates, disable it you moron. It is easier than renaming a damn file in linux.

Mysql...

Getting inappropriate non-dev results for dev search queries always makes me happy

Status: 200
Res.body: errMsg: err is undefined

That's real helpful mongo

So last semester, my college made a class compulsory to attend.
We were taught, "How to install MongoDB on Windows"...
With screenshots, not even live installation.

I wanted to die.. So much.. 😖

I remember making a product for my customer that was using a db
When I tested the product before showing it to the client, everything was good and fast and clean.
When I gave it to my customer, he was very happy, after few days he emails me about the product was very slow, I checked the database and it had a lot of *testing* shit made by him and when I asked my customer why the db has so much useless things he told me that he was learning how to it. I had no words, can't you just create a database MongoDB, MySQL or whatever you want to learn locally and play with it? Then he emails me later about a fucking refund because HE fucked up with the permissions of the db

Five years learning how to build normalized information schemas to end up designing denormalized DBs.

I once found a MongoDB cluster open to the internet with no authentication with nearly a terabyte of data that backed a CRM service whose customers included Microsoft and Adobe to name a few.

When you work with Redis after working on MongoDB... XD

Experience using MongoDB Atlas? Sure...

Might be nothing for others, but I finally published my Vue website with the following setup:
1. Vue inside docker
2. Nodejs API inside docker
3. MongoDB inside docker
4. Nginx as reverse proxy
5. Let's Encrypt

6. NO I WILL NOT SHARE THE LINK, don't want to be hacked lol and it is for personal use only.

But I'd love to thank devRant members who have helped me reach this point, two months ago I was a complete noob in Vue and a beginner in NodeJs services, now I have my own todo website customized for my needs.
Thank you :)

You have to assume mongodb didn't make it that far 😁

What would you answer if your IT support asks: "What do you use to connect to MongoDB, Internet Explorer or Chrome?"

How I wasted my Sunday:

A programmer I know claimed that his Nodejs app was lightweight since it only relied on 2 dependencies (express and mongodb)

So I wrote a script to recursively transverse the npm dependency tree and count the number of dependencies there actually is

Installing those 2 packages alone means your app depends on 73 pieces of software in total

In conclusion, nothing written in Node is ever lightweight

Oh yeah, it was also Easter I guess

mongo in slang means idiot, which comes from the term mongol or mongoloid, which is a deprecated word that used to be used for sufferers of down syndrome. So MongoDB means "Down Syndrom Data Base"

Also mongo means huge, so it may have been named after that.

My Friends: Celebrating XMas together
My Family: Celebrating XMas together
Me: Celebrating XMas by reading MongoDB docs 😏😏

There is no better way to celebrate xmas

Thank you devRanters for being so awesome and always cheering me up! :D

My ex-boss who had 35 years of experience in IT Industry, didn't know one single fucking coding language, obviously had no clue about source control or anything even remotely related to computers, and had been project manager of a project having over 1 million lines of totally undocumented code split into 389 files with no apparent structuring. All variables were either alphabets or names of programmers who developed them.
Code was in Python 2 and had bugs/line ratio ~= 5.
He asked to write a 'wrapper' class and somehow run it in Java and fix all bugs automatically. (insert Shia LaBeouf's magic GIF here)

When I said it doesn't make sense, he said you should put in hard work and do it, and not give excuses.
Time given to do this - 1 hour :-P

Good thing I quit that shit place and that pathetic moron. Love my new job and life! :D

Seriously managers should trust their developers and allow some degree of freedom. It helps a lot.

Yayyy! 3000 ++ , I have a glass desk now 😍

"Losing data is a feature". Why Snapchat loves MongoDB.

Okay karma, why?!

I made some backup scripts, it should dump our MongoDB every 30 Minutes... Nope I didn't test if there's something in the tar and yes it's my fault but now we needed this backup AND THE ONLY BACKUP SCRIPT WHICH DIDN'T WORK WAS THE ONE WHICH BACKUPS THE DATABASE...

COME OOOOON

I recently met Mongo and my life has changed forever.

I'll be old and grey before MongoDB finishes installation. 👩🏻‍💻↘️🤶🏼

If only nodejs, mongodb and stuff are taught in my university instead of goddamn php and mysql

thank you node-mongodb-native docs for these comments, I would have not figured those out

Using mongodb for one product

A colleague as experimenting with elastic search (I think it was).

It installed a proxy around the collection to get all events for the external search storage.

Worked well, but it was just a test so once done we removed it

But thats where it got scary.

When we removed the proxy through the search dashboard it dropped the underlying collection of live data!!!

A collection it did not create.

Hows that for bad UI.

Always experiment on a separate db server.

I think I should start a startup which makes chairs in shopping centres for tired boyfriends/husbands.

Dark-themed IDE + back-lit keyboard + coffee + headphones = best coding environment ^_^

Though there's always that one asshole who decides to talk to you Only when you're in the zone.

Least favorite enterprise software: MongoDB...

"Ensure all writes" is still a suggestion that sometimes works.

My God, MongoDB + GraphQL is one of the best combo in JS. Absolutely loving it!

Which Linux flavour should I install in my newly ordered ssd ?
My usage will be
vscode, chrome, mongodb,
android studio

Please take consideration of ease in installing hardware drivers. Didn't want to waste so much time on it.

Made my first Node.js Todo list today! Got myself a new front end design tool, Bootstrap Studio (50% off). Learned about REST, using Node as an API and MongoDB and Angular! Had a lot of fun learning and I would recommend it to anyone that's a Node.js beginner. I want to do a video tutorial series on Node.js, is that a good idea?

From the web!

JSON: "Ok fine you can use our syntax and everything else but make sure you change the name of the format so people know there is a difference"

MongoDB : "K"

I will close you all soon.

I see the industry evolving into dna-mutilated JS hipster virgins who use neuronal networks for even the simplest tasks an jerk off on MongoDB queries during their breaks while thinking of GraphQL queries.
Naughty.

I am turning 16 in 3 months and I want to start freelancing then. I want to earn money and get some experience .

I will still go to school until I have my a levels so I can go to university later.

Do you have any advice for an absolute freelancing beginner? I will probably make websites with HTML and CSS (of course, what the hell else) and react. Nodejs and mongodb for the Backend.

What should I do in these 3 months to prepare myself?

I want to build a portfolio website and learn more about node, especially how to do safe authentication in these 3 months, anything else? Also which websites would you recommend me?

This is the reason why I am still don’t have a girl friend

Started to learn nodejs REST, with mongodb, either the service is too light (still only has login) or mongodb is too fast, I've never seen that speed in fetching a single user with 6 properties in its json response, it takes 15ms on my laptop when a dot net core service + MySQL takes at least 70ms

git commit -am "trying to make the fucking database work locally"

My first userbot using python successfully uploaded to server.

You know it is gonna be "fun" integrating client APIs, when all of them respond with
"Thanks for submitting the request"
And no error or status code whatsoever, no matter what you send.

Also, the client likes to test/call this API in Internet explorer address bar, and doesn't trust Postman. Amazing shit dude.

Front-End-Programming
“because you follow MongoDB”

Twitter, what’s this shit? 😡😡😡

When you migrate from PHP 5.6 to PHP 7, if you use MongoDB, be careful, the driver is not the same ! So you have to rewrite your implementation !

I want to create something crazy with this architecture, what do you think?

I always feel odd when I hear about MongoDB. Cuz mongo is a German curse word for someone with down syndrom...

A great and very common web attack is known as 'SQL injection'.

So if I am using MongoDB, does that become 'NoSQL injection'?

I - Lets move your database to mlab. They offer 512mb database for free, every month. That is beyond your lifetime usage

Client - No. They Steal Data ( Like Facebook )

And client don't know a shit about mlab and development. Aware of quite a few names, bigrock, godaddy, bluehost. Even AWS is not in the list

- mlab is mongodb database service

Running Windows on crappy hardware is the worst!! takes forever to install or upgrade SQL Server.

What To Learn?

I'm a beginner in web development and have knowledge about html, css, JavaScript, jQuery, Sass, NodeJS, Express, MongoDB, Passport. You can consider me to be a beginner full stack developer, but I'm confused about what to learn further. There are so many front end frameworks that one can spend his entire life learning them. React, Vue, Angular, Backbone, etc. But I always want to learn backend properly, then there's Rails, PHP, SQL, Python. Can anyone atleast tell me what to learn and why exactly? This thing's making me mad and anxious.

Sad story:
SSHd to a vultr server, downloaded MongoDB docker (approx 170MB) download and extracting 70% of the image was done faster than me navigating from devRan notifs page, to devRant feed page, I need a new internet plan T_T

It's been a year since I first entered the world of development.

Let's see what I have accomplished so far:

Learned:
Java, J2EE, Node.js, Python, Django, Android, Angular, html/css, Rxjs, RxJava, Linux, MySQL, Mongodb, Docker, Heroku, AWS

Projects:
All unfinished.

Job:
Still working in IT security goddammit.

Fucking hell. Why am I so good at learning but shit at working?

Fucking mongodb... the name is really fitting "mongol db"..
I get that a NoSQL db can be very useful but holy crap mongodb is shit..

Even better is the security.. holy shit it's insecure..

"Just use the configuration to only allow 127.0.0.1" stfu that shit apparently doesn't work on fucking centos..

And yes my customer did get hacked
And yes they did blame me
And yes I did have a backup

I had a ticket to enhance the loading of a page.

So instead of doing 40K requests to a MySQL DB in order to generate a tree and display it to to the user on each page visit, the initial query was optimized and moreover, the results are saved in a MongoDB which will then are served to the user on each page visit.

Long story short, after a code review the code got shipped to production and there was a bug which got fixed in a Hotfix shortly afterwards.

I got all the blame for the bug.
I don't deny I have a responsibility for the bug.
Do you guys think the code reviewer also has a shared responsibility for the bug?

Are any of you guys colourblind?
If yes, I would love to know if you encounter any issues due to it, and how you deal with them.

Day after I publish a blog about mongoDB

Just spent 30 mins (in bed at 5am) thinking how to improve a mongodb collection sync process from a basic script I wrote years ago to a cleaner Java process.

But then asked myself why.... WHY THE DUCK SHOULD I TAKE THE INITIATIVE TO IMPROVE SOMETHING THAT I WILL RARELY NEED TO USE BUT WOULD MAKE ALL THE MONKEYS JOBS ON MY TEAM A LOT EASIER

NO ONE ELSE TAKES INITIATIVE, WHY THE DUCK SHOULD I...

THEY DON'T LISTEN TO WHAT I SAY EITHER...

Or I could just not share my toys anymore... Watch while everyone else toils in misery...

No idea how I ended up here. So basically started with simple wordpress websites, transitioned to react. This move was the hardest.

Then caught up on node and mongodb. And before i knew i was doing db, backend and front end tasks. Now i know bits and pieces of everything

I don’t like the term “full stack dev”. I personally feel like I’m a Jack of all trades and master of none. There’s so much to learn if you’re a full stack developer. Endless possibilities, endless rants and endless frustration 🤯

I always had this mentality that I shouldn’t rely on a certain library or framework for my entire project because what if one day they stop supporting it. (Yeah I’m talking to u vuetify) That’s why I came up with this code structure that for everything that I wanna do I have a ‘driver’ library all coded by myself that interacts with that third party framework or library so if they stop supporting it I could just change a couple of lines of code in my driver file and my codebase should be working again. But I feel like this ‘driver’ approach is not the most efficient way of going in terms of memory usage. Do you guys think I should keep it simple and directly use those libraries or this is actually not a bad approach.

Thanks MongoDB for introducing transactions (ACID) in 4.0 version ... This is really going to help a lot.

!Rant

For a school project i had to develop a copy of Skype, This had to be able to run in Linux OSx and Windows, Any suggestions about what to use ?
I thought to node js electron for the app and node + mongodb or rethinkdb as a back end

Definitely when my boss got me super hyped up that we were gonna start using MongoDB/node.js/angular or react, I spent hours learning the languages.

Then he comes up to me a few weeks later and decides to “pivot”

I wanted to cry. Back to coldfusion

After having my soul suck away by "corporate", I installed VS code on my Windows 10 gaming machine.

Now, I have a pretty hardcore dev setup on my MacOS (it's unix-based and it's good, so stop the hate). I'm talking about fully automatized Rakefile that will provision it from scratch: vim, macvim, tmux, iterm configs, 15+ brew tools, 15+ brew-cask tools, themes, plugins, etc.

Installing VS Code, Node and MongoDB on Windows, just for the fun and giggles, and not having any of my hardcore tools, made me feel like... it's something silly and fun again. I'm once again that softcore developer with no stress and no constant self-reminder to improve workflow effectiveness.

Made me a little happy.

Checkout this picture, this is my Windows 10's "tmux" lol

What cloud service does DevRant use?

Aws Or Azure?
And how much do you pay a month for maintenance costs?

What tables to store data? MongoDB, dynamoDB, oracle?
Or S3 streams?

Just wondering.

So... We're going to totally rewrite one of our web applications at work. It's currently written using the .NET framework, and we're moving to Node.js instead. For me, that's absolutely wonderful! Outside work I practically only work with Node, so I'm happy. There is just one thing that's bothering me. My colleague wants to use MySQL for the database. Even worse is that he's the one deciding, since I started working there just a couple of weeks ago.

Now, I really, really want to use Mongodb. It integrates so wonderfully with Node together with Mongoose, and just the thought of using JSON everywhere makes my body shiver of satisfaction.

So therefore I have two questions.

A. Would you prefer Mongodb over MySQL for a node application?
B. How the hell can I convince him to use Mongodb?!

Cheers!

I'm still unable to find a single advantage of using the Firebase Database over MongoDB, yet people keep suggesting me to do so.
WHY? I can host Mongo for free on my own server and won't have to worry about *READING* costing money!

MongoDB
Express
Golang
Angular
Node.js

MEGAN, aka the White Girl Stack.

I think the reason most people hate frontend these days can be summed up by the fact that the frontend of my fairly simple React webapp is about 850 loc while the entire Express and MongoDB server is a mere 234 loc

God damn frontend is a lot of work these days

You guys heard of the MEAN Stack?
I'm currently learning it...

It is basically the combination of MongoDB, Express.js, AngularJS and Node.js

I applied for two technical talks in a popular conference summit, the two talks were turned down and the reason was that they are much more technical talks than mine. I switched to watch the live stream today and all i see is a bunch of stupid talks (they decided to pick a talk on git aliases over working with change streams and multi document transactions in mongodb). A friend of mine just told me, your talk won't be accepted if you don't know any of the organizers

I thought I'd seen the worst possible code.
Until I saw this stored procedure. It was forming a string of JSON by concatenation of double quotes and queries in between.
No wonder it took upwards of 200 seconds to insert just one record.

Today I tried to make an asp.net app and publish it to iis all without the help of Visual Studio. This is teribly difficult!
Then I had a great idea for website to store my .ppt and .doc files (and other school shit) with mongodb and tried node.js as backend. Holy shit did I really host everything all in 10 lines of js!?!?!!! Comment some great tutorials.

so if i get this correctly :

1. mongodb( community server) is going to create some files in my system which will be called "databases/collections/document bullshit via its own special process called mongod (similar to mysql , but ok)

2. my python flask app is going to connect to it via its official driver pymongo (which could be used directly)
3. mongoengine is a library (more of a wrapper on pymongo) providing "easy ways for connecting mongodb via pymongo" (which again could be used directly)

4. flask-mongoengine is library (more of a wrapper on mongoengine providing "easy ways for connecting mongodb via mongoengine via pymongo" (which again could be used directly)

5. flask-pymongo is some another bullshit library/wrapper that took away 6hours of mine which again is "A FUCKING WRAPPER PROVIDING EASY WAYS FOR CONNECTING TO MONGODB VIA PYMONGO"

seriously, fuck web development. Why can't the original driver (i.e pymongo from mongodb devs) could have simpler wrappers? and why does my fucking tutorial instructor had to use the most fucking rarely used flask-mongoengine (which i accidently read as flask-pymongo and got f**ked) to teach newbies? fucking day wasted trying to understand this crap.

I don't like monnopolies, but its somewhat good that the mobile environment is still in the hands of nononsense players like google and oracle(java) . atleast we don't have people releasing wrapper over wrapper over wrapper and then fighting about which wrapper is better to use.
Like , even when devs started cmplaining that android dbs are too difficult to understand, google themselves created an actively supported wrapper that shutted down the fight over which wrapper to use(sqldelight, realm,sql bright etc)

MongoDB and java is aids.

!rant
After 4 - 5 months of learning webD, I am trying to build my first fullstack web application (simple chat one ).

My stack :
FRONTEND:
Vue.js + Materialize

Backend:
Express ( handling routes )
Mongoose/MongoDB ( Database )
Socket.io ( web sockets for real time connection )
JWT

Had dreamt of this 2 months ago where I built a basic front end using html and css, and now porting it to Vue is like a breeze.

Wish me luck and let's hope it doesnot become one of the unfinished projects. ( My university semester exams are coming up , would have to complete this as fast as possible ). I am also learning DSA + STL and aim to learn basic python syntax before holidays so that I can focus my time on ML during them. It's so fucking overloaded that I have my doubts ::((

Took a day off and came back to find my team and I were moved from frontend to backend (which I always wanted to be).

Manager says we get to learn Java, Mongodb and even Hadoop.

I am so so excited.

But the only little hold back is, there is limited support for Java in sublime text and I should instead use eclipse. I had dozens of shortcuts customised with all those beautiful themes in sublime, but eclipse takes the fun out of coding(no offense to eclipse lovers).

Playing around with Node.

I'm not a beefy dude, But I consider myself as a terminator 🔫 because when I find a BUG I fucking console log the shit out of it !

How do you folks handle your pagination at backend?

I was initially using skip and limit. But that is prone to error.
Then I thought about using last sent items id and using its created_at time and fetching rows/documents after that. But that too is prone to error ( more than one can have same timestamp) hence either having data repeats or data That gets missed.

What is your goto strategy for pagination?

Experimented with these logos to create stickers.

Probably that one time we lost to a shitty app that was of no use to the community and literally scammed the opinion of the jury.

Their concept was a webapp that would suggest a room to study to a student on our campus. It was called "is it free/vacant" but should've been called "is it open" since there is no way of knowing how many seats are occupied, etc.

The jury was amazed, the app was worthless, literally 15 minutes of coding, presentation had a shit ton of buzz words like "were using mongodb to store the classrooms", was just fucking horrible

On the same competition a guy tried to enter his company that was developing the Facebook page managing app for Windows phone, already having a working app and making revenue from it for at least a year lol

We still got second place, but it was a really disappointing second place, shit was rigged yo

When it comes to choosing a database,  What is the best for a Java project?

1.SQL - MySQL
2.NoSQL- MongoDB

Clients wanted a simple backend to be deployed specifically on Apache. Used PHP. Spoke to them and they were fine with PHP .... Until I delivered the application. Told me how bad a developer I am to not use the MEAN stack. Didn't even pay.

I'm currently doing project in Java using JavaFX for GUI and after like 6 months I found out we can bind textfields to variables(yea,dumb me) and I got more than 20 forms so of course, binding is useful than that getText method. So I think there are many things like this which will help me to optimize my code but I dont know, so can anyone tell me more stuff like this?
I'm using MongoDb so I'm currently finding easiest way to make Bson document from textfield values. Any suggestions?
(Sorry, for my bad English)

Has anyone here used MongoDB for relational databases? I am trying to use MySQL with Node but I feel like the whole thing is a mess. There are some ORMs like Knex or Sequelize for MySQL but they are pretty crap. I am thinking if I should just move onto MongoDB instead of MySQL, at the same time I feel a little dirty to store relational data in a document store :(

The MEAN Stack with Firebase connected to Angular instead of an ExpressJS Server and without ExpressJS and MongoDB. -

Why is it so hard to install mongodb on ubuntu 16.04? I've spend 3 hours installing that junk.

Netbeans, because its awesome!! no other explanation lol

I've been creating a new website layout for a small theatre group. I am like how it's coming together :)

It is designed with user interaction in mind because the layout they are using now is... Well, thrown together. It uses images as buttons and I had a few friends of mine ask "Where do I get tickets" and it is not updated regularly.

I plan to automate a few things like for shows, if the show date has passed, it will remove itself from the home page. I also plan to web scrape, if the site permits, some information to be displayed on the show page.

I got to lots to do before I can show them what I've made.

Windows Subsystem for Linux has given me more problems in the last 48 hours than any other "os". Npm barely wants to function and God forbid I run mongodb.

!rant
I built a webinterface a few months ago. it was based on the php framework laravel. but i want to change to nodejs in combination with mongodb.
do you know good nodejs mvc frameworks similar to laravel?

I remember back then when we were building an E-commerce website. To maintain good performance the boss insisted using flat table. This was also applied to other projects like GPS. That was already 2013 when NoSQL databases like MongoDB was around already. His concern is he didn't like to risk on new technologies and it would cost money for training instead of using the existing "MySQL" and Microsoft SQL Server.
Everything I learned from that guy was just poop.

Can we just agree that mongodb is shit and we all would just be happy without it?
Its the example of all things that should not exist.

What is the purpose of using MongoDB and then adding mongoose?
If you want schemas, relations and all the jazz mongoose offers, have you considered using a RDBMS instead of a datapile system? Most (probably all) SQL databases support schemas, relations and all the jazz you seem to need.

So, ask yourself: Do you really need the functionality of a NoSQL database or do you just want it because it's shiny and new and "everybody uses it (tm)"?

its hard to keep yourself updated with apis, specially when you are nodejs/javascript developer.

Creating a simple application to keep track of changes in api and inform the subscribers about changes.

Stack - Vue.js (quasar), nodejs, mongoDb

I suck at DevOps at least as hard as I'm good at front-end/UX. I found out as a result of the local job market starting to get needy for 'full-stack'. Stuck for 2 days on setting up a Docker/ Dockerhub/ DigitalOcean/ Bitbucket pipeline with Nginx/ Node/ MongoDB Cloud & Webpack/ React.

*Sigh*

What cheap/good quality node.js hosting provider for nodejs/react/mongodb app do you suggest? (including sale, black friday etc.)

What certifications do you guys have, and which do you recommend having?

I'm currently pursuing AWS Developer Assosiate, and in the future Google certified Android developer and MongoDB developer.

Been thinking about Docker but it costs too much

! Suggestion

So I've one project based on fingerprint scanner where the scanner came with sdk for c# and other language libraries.
So basically the user punches for login and logout I'm storing timestamp based on that to MongoDB. Now the only concern is when the user punches, it doesn't give any response like sound or light for telling it's accepted or not.
For that I've to do something so my guess was
1. Sound
2. Light

But, it's for library and they don't want sound. And my scanner don't have any extra light for that.
Anyone got any suggestion or cool idea?
(I'm using Nitgen Fingkey Hamster I DX HFDU06)

- Continue learning Node.js, Express, MongoDB (I just need to learn mongoose now, then I can start making bigger projects).

- Learn PHP and start making freelance work;

- Continue getting good grades at uni;

- Workout more often (like 4 times per week);

- MAKE MONEY!!!

Edit: Happy 2018!!!

A simple app, just proceed with the coding. it doesn't matter whether it's mysql or mongo. Get the shit done guys!

Just spent all morning adding my own user account to my local MongoDB because some network security guy found I was running an unprotected server on my PC....

I tried all the admin roles to get full access across all databases I have but none worked....

Until I see one at the bottom of the official documentation:

root

I am building a web application which is multimedia centric (mostly video chat). Text to Speech and vice versa.
I have chosen Node with mongoDb as backend API with React Frontend.
What stack would you suggest for such an application?

As an Angular developer, i am thinking switching to React, major companies and websites are using it
React:
Facebook,Twitter Instagram,Dropbox,Aws,New outlook,mongodb cloud, Amazon drive,Udemy, ....

Angularjs
Gcloud, not many more

Angular 2+
???????

Is the switch advisable?

MongoDB database with really relational data. One main collection that had refs to four other collections, all of those references necessary to populate data for a page view. Complicated aggregate to populate all the necessary data and then filter based on criteria selected by the user. And then the client decides that he wants the information to be sortable by column. Some of those columns are fields on the main model, no problem. Others are fields on the refs, which is more of a problem. Especially given that these refs aren’t one single object. They’re arrays of objects.

The revelation was that I could just write an aggregate function to flat map the main collection, returning only the fields necessary for the search, and output it to a new collection and instead use that new collection for displaying and filtering/sorting search results.

But you can’t run the aggregate all the time, you surely say. If anything changes in the main collection, it won’t be reflected in the search results!

Mongoose post(‘findOneAndUpdate’) hooks, my friends. Mongoose post(‘findOneAndUpdate’) hooks.

Never been so happy to have a thing working properly in my life.

Today is bank holiday in the UK. Fucking boss slacked me to say he needs graphql n mongodb wired up by tomorrow. I almost tell him to fuck off, today is not work, bitch

Just dumped one month's GitHub public data or my local machine. Ah boy that was too much data. About 80 GB with 30.9 million documents in mongodb. Too much for local machine. :sigh:

Bored and want something to do? Learn MongoDB. There’s SO many great resources out there! I have legit enjoyed these first three courses in Mongo University (+1 on Udemy).