Okay. So my dumbass boss took this project that had a steep timeline. I told him straight up, it won't work because we won't make the timeline. If we do this, I will be the one bending over backwards to deliver. I don't like to promise and fail. I got the oh don't worry let's just try. If we don't make it that's fine. Unfortunately that's not how I work. I refuse to deliberately fail. So I say okay and we begin. I suggested open source is the fastest way to deliver bit the fucked up part is, I am the only senior dev in the team. I will be expected to reverse engineer the open source app to connect our own deployment parameters. Use tech I have never used before. Connect frontend and backend. Handle dns bullshit. I have literally been working on Vibes and coffee for the past two weeks because ofcourse I ran into so many issues. Now I have an extension for Monday and I hate to fail. So I am not sleeping or resting just working on a fucking java app I didnt build and I am expected to make it work seemlessly on our production environment. I made some progress. Deployed frontend, deployed backend. Forgot to connect production dB so I decided to go with azure database for mysql driver since we have credits on azure. Now my java app is pissing itself over ssl handshake. I generate my keystore and add it and now java socket just times out. I want to pummel somebody or a punching bag that looks like my boss.

Gpt 4.5 is out and it's only benefit is 'vibes'. Probably doubled down on being woke. Also, it's expensive as F. Pure to screw over stupid people who want to use newest without thinking. Btw, the people who present it in the openai video are terrible. They're just promoting the awkward unsocial stereotyped nerd. I don't believe those people really work on it. A true nerd always knows how to tell about their shit with detail and passion. That's what makes them a nerd, not being social awkward.

Fuck you OpenAI, in any way.

DON’T READ IF YOU DON’T LIKE LONG STORIES. ALSO DON’T EVEN BOTHER INTERACTING IF YOU’RE JUST GOING TO BE NEGATIVE.🙂
How should I start… Because I am a socially awkward dumb a**, I have trouble talking to literally everyone, even my close friends. One of which in particular that (I think) I have liked for years, but I’m too dumb to know for sure so I confessed to them to figure it out, and, like I thought, they rejected me, but I didn’t really feel anything, so I was like, “Oh, guess I don’t like them then🤷,” and things were fine even afterwards (this was a while ago btw.) But even if I am socially awkward, I at least try to wave or say hi to my friends when I see them. In relation to this, recently I have made a habit of saying hi to that one close friend in particular, and I don’t know much about my feelings, which means I definitely won’t know much about other peoples’ feelings, but it looked to me like that friend felt a bit uncomfortable whenever I said hi. Now, hitting me like a wrecking ball (lol), I realized, I probably love them. (Which is a completely new concept for me.) Which made it hurt ALL THE MORE when I asked my friend about their apparent discomfort, and got the answer I was hoping I wouldn’t. This friend no longer felt like we would be a good fit. The friend said that they don’t feel our vibes match (something like that), which I guess makes them not want to talk to me as much either, but we could still check in with each other occasionally. I told them, and meant, that I COMPLETELY understand, because I mean, who would really want to be friends with and talk to someone that barely talks themselves and barely makes an effort to make new friends or talk to other people? A friend that never comes and hangs out at their house or that doesn’t even like going out? But it hurt nonetheless. It confuses and hurts me that this friend doesn’t really want to talk to me but also apparently cares enough to not completely cut ties with me. I’m not mad at them in the slightest, but what am I supposed to do? Completely forget my feelings for them and the, albeit meager, memories we’ve made together as friends, but also keep them close enough to be at least acquaintances? I don’t think I can or want to do that, but I guess it’s not my choice now. I have to try.