Long rant ahead, but it's worth it.

I used to work with a professor (let's call him Dr. X) and developed a backend + acted as sysadmin for our team's research project. Two semesters ago, they wanted to revamp the front end + do some data visualization, so a girl (let's call her W) joined the team and did all that. We wanted to merge the two sites and host on azure, but due to issues and impeding conferences that require our data to be online, we kept postponing. I graduate this semester and haven't worked with the team for a while, so they have a new guy in charge of the azure server (let's call him H), and yesterday my professor sends me (let's call me M), H and W an email telling us to coordinate to have the merge up on azure in 2-3 days, max. The following convo was what I had with H:

M: Hi, if you just give me access to azure I'll be able to set everything up myself, also I'll need a db set up, and just send me the connection string.
H: Hi, we won't have dbs because that is extra costs involved since we don't have dynamic content. Also I can't give you access, instead push everything on git and set up the site on a test azure server and I will take it from there.
M: There is proprietary data on the site...
H: Oh really? I don't know what's on it.
<and yet he knows we have no dynamic data>
M: Fine, I'll load the data some other way, but I have access to all the data anyway, just talk to Dr. X and you'll see you can give me access. Delete my access after if you want.
H: No, just do what I said: git then upload to test azure account.

Fine, he's a complete tool, but I like Dr. X, so I message W and tell her we have to merge, she tells me that it's not that easy to set it up on github as she's using wordpress. She sends me instructions on what to do, and, lo and behold, there's a db in her solution. Ok, I go back to talking to H:

M: W is using a db. Talk to her so we can figure out whether we need a database or not.
H: We can't use a database because we want to decrease costs.
M: Yes I know that, so talk to her because that probably means she has to re-do some stuff, which might take some time. Also there might be dynamic content in what she's doing.
H: This is your project, you talk to her.
<I'm starting to get mad right now>
M: I don't know what they had her do apart from how it interfaces with what I've done.
H: We still can't have databases.
M: Listen, I don't do wordpress, and I'm not gonna mess with it, you talk to her
H: I won't do any development
<So you won't do any dev, but you won't give me access to do it either?>
M: Man, the bottleneck isn't the merging right now, it's the fact that W needs a db
H: I know, so talk to her
M: THE RESTRICTION TO NOT HAVE DATABASES IS NOT MINE, IT'S YOURS, YOU TALK TO HER. I can't evaluate whether it's a reasonable enough reason or not since I don't know the requirements or what they're willing to spend.
H: It's your project.
M: Then give me fucking access to azure and I'll handle it, you know you'll have to set up wordpress again regardless whether we set it up the first time.
H: Man just do your job.

At this point I lost it. WHAT A FUCKING TOOL. He doesn't wanna do dev work, wants me to go through the trouble of setting up on a test subscription first, and doesn't want to give me access to azure. What's more, he did shit all and doesn't want to anything else. Well fuck you. I googled him, to see if he's anyone important, if he's done anything notable which is why he's being so God damn condescending. MY INTERNSHIP ALONE ECLIPSES HIS ENTIRE CV. Then what the fuck?

There's also this that happened sometime during our talk:

M: You'll have to take to Dr. Y so he'll change the DNS to point to the azure subscription instead of my server.
H: Yea don't worry, too early for that.
M: DNS propagation takes 24 hours...
H: Yea don't worry.

DNS propagation allows the entire web to know that your website is hosted on a different server so it can change where it's pointing to. We have to do this in 2-3 days. Why do work in parallel? Nah let's wait.

I went over his head and talked to the professor directly, and despite wanting to tell him that he was both drunk and high the day he hired that guy, I kept it professional. He hasn't replied yet, but this fucker's pompous attitude is just too much for me alone, so I had to share.

PS: I named his contact as Annoying Prick 4 minutes into our chat. Gonna rename him cz that seems tooooooo soft a name right now.

Are you moving to Gitlab?
Shocker: Gitlab is hosted on Microsoft Azure.

So I have been temporarily assigned to new team .. moving from mainly backend.. to help the Web team ..

Me .: Aight guys .. what we working with ?
Team: MVC .net
Me: awesome ..
Team: but we have our own version of MVC .
Me : 🤔 your own MVC ?
Team: yeh we only buse controllers.. but no models at all ?
Me.: 😲 So where does the view gets its data from ?
Team : from Azure functions apps.
M: how ?
T: ( in very proud tone ) .. we use js to call all functions.
M: so why not just use HTML pages . Why MVC then !
T: coz MVC is modern architecture design.
M: but you not using it and all of calles to the functions are exposed publicly.
T: 🧐 THIS IS MODERN DESIGN !!
M: 🤪 My bad .. what the hell do I know ! I only been developing MVC applications for 7 years !!
Please tell me more about your " Modern Design "
🤮🤮🤮

Boss: Let's move our servers to the cloud. We should use Amazon Azure.

Dear Microsoft,

Thanks for not completely fucking up Github. At least you didn't integrate Office365, allow only Azure deployments, or force downloading repos through OneDrive or something.

But like most developers, I don't deal well with changes to familiar interfaces.

So please.... STOP FUCKING TWEAKING THE BUTTON PLACEMENTS AND TEXTS ALL OVER THE WEBSITE.

(or at least send me a bottle of cognac and a box of chocolates before every UI experiment, so I can deal with it emotionally. I'm a very sensitive boy, you know).

Fucking HR cunts. I found a nice computer vision vacancy and decided to apply, look what these motherfuckers require :

- Java
- Typescript
- C++
- Javascript
- Amazon Web Services
- OpenCV
- Kubernates
- Spring Boot
- Azure
- Jenkins
- Postgres
- MongoDB
- ELK
- Web Sockets
- Hadoop
- Grafana - Prometheus
- Java EE
- Graph QL
- Kafka
- R
- Angular
- Puppet
- NiFi
- Docker
- Qpid
- Golang
- FPGA-VHDL
- Python

FUCK OFF FUCK OFF FUCKING FuCK OFF you monkeys. Shove your vacancy up your ass.

Another vacancy, another instance, I'm going to apply at employers site, (they sell some sort of CRM crapshit) forms not working, bc not fucking connected to anything. Just a fucking HTML and JS popup notification for submission laying around with its legs wide spread. Like its copied from w3schools or something.
Looked more on the site it is fucked from all sides like it's made by a school kid.

So I fired an email to the HR, something like "I went to apply but your forms are not working, I found the issue, it's that. Also I found some glory holes in your site, hope your I.T. finds them too. Anyways here is my CV, have a nice day"

Day later I'm shortlisted.

I beg your pardon Microsoft, what did you just call me?

How most recruiter emails go these days:

- Hiring multiple senior lead engineers <— That’s me
- 180k+ <— I like it.
- Must have experience with AWS, GCE, AND Azure <— Okay, you’re looking for a unicorn
- Kubernetes expert
- Experience with Rust, Node, and .NET <— What type of fucking company are you?
- Must be on call and 25% travel <— Why?
- Preferred: experience with printer repair, Raid Arrays, CAT5, and Microsoft Access <— Y’all fucked up somewhere a long time ago. I’m out.

Today my manager asked me about my research into using RabbitMQ as a backup in case Azure Service Bus ever goes down.

Me: "Good. The way we designed the framework, all we have to do is drop the DLLs into the directory, update the config, and the services will start using RabbitMQ."
Mgr: "Excellent. Probably should be looking into using RabbitMQ as a permanent replacement for Azure"
Me: "What? The whole reason we moved to Azure was to eliminate the problems with having an on prem service bus. Since we've switched, there has been zero downtime."
Mgr: "That's what VP-Joe is afraid of. If Azure ever goes down, he won't know how to explain Azure to the president as to why we're not taking orders or can't ship packages."
Me: "That makes no sense. What did VP-Joe tell the president when a database goes down or a server mis-configuration?"
Mgr: "President understands internal outages, its just the whole 'cloud' thing he doesn't understand."
Me: "Um..then VP-Joe needs to explain it to him?"
Mgr: "The decision has already been made. Are you on board? Lets look at this move as a cost savings."
Me: "You mean the $10 a month? How much hardware will we need to support RabbitMQ?"
Mgr: "Yea, nobody probably thought of that."
Me: "I'm on board with whatever decision, but I'd like a little more than VP-Joe being afraid of the president."
Mgr: "I'm sure its not being afraid."
Me: "..."
Mgr: "OK, lets wait and see if VP-Joe forgets about this and moves on to something new."

I was gonna talk shit about Microsoft but I just won an Azure swagbag on Twitter so I'll keep it to myself for today.

Boss: log in to azure and fix this server
Me: I don't have access
Boss: why not?
Me: you never gave me access...
Boss: ...
Me: hello?
Boss: (never responds in chat)
Me: 😒

When you see it 😂😂

Your resume:
Git
SSL
Vue
Angular
React
Node
Spring boot
MySQL
MongoDb
HTML
CSS
Java
Javascript
Bootstrap
Cassandra
Hive
Hadoop
Block chain
GraphQL
Kubernetics
Jenkins
Azure
GCP

Interviewer:
Sorry, we need someone who knows AWS

My humble work space :)

My six word horror story.

We switched from aws to azure

Today in train programming:
Pushed a new build before pulling into station
Battery dies
Test on tablet
Build is broken, files missing
Upload files manually to Azure (WHY)
try to log in to my sure to treat, forgotten password
Try to reset password, smtp details in DB are wrong...

I'm doing well

I wrote an azure web job to screen scrape a specific page of disneystore.com and send me an email if an Elsa dress was in stock so I could buy it for my daughter. This dress would be available for literally seconds at a time.

Developers after Microsoft picked up npmjs...

Every year my team runs an award ceremony during which people win “awards” for mistakes throughout the year. This years was quite good.

The integration partner award- one of our sysAdmins was talking with a partner from another company over Skype and was having some issues with azure. He intended to send me a small rant but instead sent “fucking azure can go fuck itself, won’t let me update to managed disks from a vhd built on unmanaged” to our jv partner.

Sysadmin wannabe award (mine)- ran “Sudo chmod -R 700 /“ on one of our dev systems then had to spend the next day trying to fix it 😓

The ain’t no sanity clause award - someone ran a massive update query on a prod database without a where clause

The dba wannabe award - one of our support guys was clearing out a prod dB server to make some disk space and accidentally deleted one of the databases devices bringing it down.

The open source community award - one of the devs had been messing about with an apache proxy on a prod web server and it ended up as part of a botnet

There were others but I can’t remember them all

I actually like Microsoft these days. Despite developing on Mac machines, we use VSTS for code repo, build/release pipelines and work item tracking, and Azure for all things cloud. It all works incredibly well together and at low cost.

Microsoft has changed ethos massively in the last few years. In my opinion, the classic dev mantra of “Microsoft is shit and evil, Linux is flawless” is outdated and getting kind of boring.

Does anyone know a free hosting that support .net core web api without credit card? It’s just for a school project. IBM Bluemix only supports normal web app and azure needs credit card

Hoooly shit, I'm starting to love my university.

Yesterday or so, they offered me a 1TB lifetime Google Drive account.

Today they offered me a Microsoft Imagine account where I'm able to get any Microsoft license I want for free for 5 years!
(In Portugal! WTF!)

Win10, Office 2016, VSEnterprise or community 2017, SQL Server 2017, Azure!!!, etc!
Wohooooo!

I'm sorry to all the Linux people, I'm a Microsoft guy...

Dear people who think Microsoft buying GitHub is fine because Microsoft is more supportive of open source than before.

Here's the facts.

1) Microsoft is a large tech company investing in many things. That's a fact.

2) If Microsoft were to exploit GitHub, it would be a benefit to other departments in Microsoft. This is also a fact.

(For example, if tomorrow GitHub was tied to azure or some annoying shit like that.)

3) If such exploitation occurs, it will most likely be to the detriment of the free community of developers. This is a highly probable outcome.

4) The only question now is this.

"Does Microsoft care about open source enough to cut down on potential profit."

The answer of any sane, unbiased individual had to be no.

This is why people leave GitHub today. It is NOT because some childish hatred for Microsoft. In fact, I would've personally moved out of GitHub if "any" other large tech company had bought it, thereby compromising it's neutrality.

Edit: spelling

Setup my port honeypot today finally, including port 22, then wrote a custom dashboard for some data tracking, feels great to have it open on my screen seeing the bans just roll in every 2 seconds of refresh, the highest hits are as expected from china, russia and india, also filed ~700 reports and already got 300 banned from their service. (mainly Microsoft Azure for whatever reason)

I wanted to first automate that (or atleast blacklist report to various IP lists via API), but then I was afraid that I'll be one day stupid enough to somehow get banned - don't want myself to get reported lol

Mid-Friday: Boss: Start programming this application.
Me: Cool, how will it be setup? what lang-
Boss: Everything's already setup, just start programming in PHP. Check in and make sure it's done by Wednesday morning before 9.
Mid-Tuesday:
Me: Cool, it's done. Had some trouble with connecting our database to the clients, some permissions were conflicting.
Boss: Now I need you to pull it, publish it to our other azure portal, change it to ASP.NET Core 2.1 MVC and install it to teams. Also change the database to MySQL.
Me: I thought everything was already setup.
Boss: things change.
Me: Cool.
*Pulls an all nighter*
Me: Something isn't right...
Wednesday
Me*hasn't slept yet*: It's done.
Boss: Why do you look so tired?
Me: I was working last night
Boss: Well you shouldn't do that.
Me: The deadline is today. only way it was going to get done before 9 was to do it last night.
Boss: Doesn't matter.
9am Meeting:
Boss: it was easy, no hassle, it's up and running.
Me: no hassle?

OFFICE 365 IS FUCKIN DOGSHIT, I CAN’T EVEN LOGIN TO FUCKING OUTLOOK BECAUSE MS WAY OF GIVING ME THE 2FA WAS SO VAGUE AND RANDOM

I FUCKING HATE MS TEAMS

I FUCKING HATE AZURE DEVOPS

I FUCKING HATE MSSQL

I FUCKING MS

I have never doubted my abilities more, before this happened:

I got a Linux VM on Azure, downloaded apache httpd source which I proceeded to configure, make and install.

As expected, install failed with something related to apr and apr-util.

Searched several mailing lists, tried out several configure options, nothing worked..

After almost an hour, it stuck to me, all I had to do was "sudo yum install httpd" !!!

Disappointed that I missed something so simple, but when I did that, it came back with 'Nothing to do'...

Realized, httpd was pre-installed in that VM.. I just had to start the service !!!

:facepalm

I booted up the biggest windows VM azure could have and posted this on facebook saying something like "it's about time i make an upgrade"

After 'Dev' deployed a service using Azure ServiceBus, a particular queue/client was receiving errors.

Dev: "Looking at the logs, client is getting faulted."
Me: 'What is the error being logged?'
Dev: 'Client is faulted'
Me: 'No, that is our error when the client is either unable to connect or there is an exception in the middle of sending a message. What is the exception from Azure?'
Dev: 'Client is faulted. That's it. I'm going to have to re-engineer the code to implement a retry policy.'
<OK, I smell someone cooking up some solution finding, so I dig into the logs a little further>
Me: "Looks like an invalid connection string. The actual exception being thrown and logged is from the Azure client connection string builder. The value cannot be null."
Dev: "No, I'm looking right at the connection string in the config. Looks fine."
Me: "Looks correct on your machine, but what is actually being deployed to the server?"
<I could tell he was getting agitated>
<Dev clicks around, about 10 min. later>
Dev: "Aha!..I found it. The connection string in the config on the main branch is wrong, in fact, the entry is missing."
<dev fixes, re-deploys, life is good, I document the error and the root cause>
Boss: "Great job Dev."

*sigh* ..go teamwork?

Won the 2nd prize in a Microsoft hosted hackathon. No for Windows but they really have good cognitive services. Used Azure vision api, one of the good ocr service available.

Finally some "me time" on a Saturday!

We have a long time developer that was fired last week. The customer decided that they did not want to be part of the new Microsoft Azure pattern. They didn't like being tied to a vendor that they had little control over; they were stuck in Windows monoliths for the last 20 years. They requested that we switch over to some open source tech with scalable patterns.

He got on the phone and told them that they were wrong to do it. "You are buying into a more expensive maintenance pattern!" "Microsoft gives the best pattern for sustaining a product!" "You need to follow their roadmap for long term success!" What a fanboy.

Now all of his work including his legacy stuff is dumped on me. I get to furiously build a solution based on scalable node containers for Kubernetes and some parts live in AWS Lambda. The customer is super happy with it so far and it deepened their resolve to avoid anything in the "Microsoft shop" pattern. But wow I'm drowning in work.

To all "I hate microsoft" weepers out there. :)

Well, I like the way Microsoft moved. I LOVE Nuget, I like Github. I like how you they moved to open source!

I like Visual Code, love Visual Studio Community Edition, hell yeah some dont do that I heard. About Dotnetcore: (asp)dotnetcore is a fucking miracle. I LOVE it, I LOVE the conventionmodelbuilder, I LOVE how they allow DI. I like the easy shipping, I like the cutting of dependencies. I also like Azure, And to be honest:I like the C# language. I even think it's the best I ever had to use. And I love LINQ, I love Entity Framework, and WPF!

I like the way all that works together, integrated, without having to fuck around, (think of maven+gradle and crap conventionless plugins).

I like their documentation, I like how they keep you up to date. I like their feedback programme, which actually gets issues done.

I like their developer-first approach. I like their focus on SOLID, code quality and development guidelines.

I like a lot about them. frankly, I would still prefer them to all this linux and java crap, even if they took away my favorite shortcuts..

Lets be honest... You rant about that? Then you never seriously tried big scale software engineering with that. Its a charm,

Universities.. stop teaching people that java bullshit.

Now burn me.

To all the people migrating from github to gitlab, just so you know gitlab is hosted on azure.

Microsoft's Azure team understands.

Just attended Azure DevOps Launch here in Philippines

Motherfuckin fuckidy duck fuck!

I am so done with Azure for today!

After I ran out of space on a secondary drive I shut the VM down and increased said drive and now after starting it (which takes way too long already) I can't ssh into it: "Connection refused". Diagnostics say "everything is fine bruh" and now I'm stuck with an inaccessible VM which I already spent half the night on configuring and downloading 60gb of sources.. aaargh!

Microsoft Azure documentation telling you how to exit vi. Lame.

who wants a free 100 dollars azure voucher valid for one month?

Don't put the Delete and Deploy button next to eachother. Like fr. Bro.

I went to this conference to see what’s new in MSSQL 2019, kubernetes container on azure and see what Microsoft has done to embrace open source community.

Speaker is from Microsoft, brings a Mac to the conference which I’m kool wit it,
but shortly after he started, Word crash at launch, PowerPoint freezes when switch between pages, azure cli can’t login properly.
And he goes ”this is awkward. “

Those managers who think that Microsoft is the only platform and believe that Linux is insecure - fuck off. I don't want to use azure, you ass.

Not exactly a dev related rant.

Do you ever get the feeling when you're not working, like today, that you're kinda wasting time (can't find a better way to describe)? I usually work on Sunday at home, running behind insane deadlines, trying to anticipate tasks. Today was different, I woke up to a fresh VS 2017 install, updated my .net core api to 2.0, learnt how to deploy to Azure, made a CI/CD pipeline and then spend some fun time with my 5 month baby. Argued with him when Azure didn't let me make a new subscription. Sat on the sidewalk with him doing absolutely nothing for a solid half hour, only looking the way he admired everything around him and stuff. Took the trash out, did the dishes, helped with the laundry. But yet I feel like tomorrow gonna be a rough day, where everything will blow up 'cause I didn't did anything work related.

I'm starting to think I lost the taste of enjoying myself, enjoying the people around me, my family, parents, friends. I've been spending too much time on autopilot. Wake up, smoke, work, eat, work, smoke, sleep. Repeat.

I do enjoy my job, a little less when it's not dev related, but I do anyway. We are a small company with big contracts and tight deadlines. Always struggling to give our best and advance further, but I can see I'm loosing something while giving 120% of attention to my job.

Anyway, just wanted to get this thing out of my chest. Thank you if you read this far.

Ahahahahahaha

Unpopular Opinion: When Satya came to Microsoft leadership, Microsoft was a whole lot better company

Forget Windows and shit, Azure was the only open Microsoft on Ballmer days, then Satya, who were part of Azure decided to give the entire MSFT the Azure experience. Look where we are now

not saying Microsoft is no longer bad, its just more tolerable as a company now. Nice to see it backtracking and bracing stuff unlike its first leaderships

Why not to use gitlab:
-Runs on ruby which is VERY VERY VERY wasteful in processing power and thus in energy
-It's hosted on azure

Why to stay with github:
-There won't be a lot of change
-It's reliable and this won't change so fast
-It's like admitting defeat towards MS who want to ruin our lives lol

Microsoft Azure down on a Friday at home time? Whoever tripped over that cable is probably trying awfully hard to slink out of the building unnoticed right about now

Working in a bank, using MIcrosoft platform:

To open my email, I need to enter my password and sms OTP.

To open my email using phone, I need to enter my password and sms OTP.

To open Teams, I need to enter my password and sms OTP.

To open Teams using phone, I need to enter my password and sms OTP.

To access Microsoft Azure, I need to enter my password and sms OTP.

To git pull/push, I need to enter my sms OTP.

To check UAT logs, I need to enter my sms OTP.

To get access to UAT DB, I need to connect to VPN, which then asks for OTP.

Did I also mention that I need to do these OTPs every single fucking day?

#OTPDrivenDevelopment

STOP PUTTING 5 GB FILES IN THE DATABASE KYLE WE LITERALLY HAVE AZURE BLOB SOTRAGE ALL SET UP.

So it's 23h30 last night and I've turned on the projector to watch the last episode of Mr Robot.
As I start the episode, I receive an email on my phone telling me that some important Azure webjob is throwing exceptions...
Fuuuuuuuuckkkkkkkkk
1 hour later it was fixed, and I watched my episode. Win!

Okay. So my dumbass boss took this project that had a steep timeline. I told him straight up, it won't work because we won't make the timeline. If we do this, I will be the one bending over backwards to deliver. I don't like to promise and fail. I got the oh don't worry let's just try. If we don't make it that's fine. Unfortunately that's not how I work. I refuse to deliberately fail. So I say okay and we begin. I suggested open source is the fastest way to deliver bit the fucked up part is, I am the only senior dev in the team. I will be expected to reverse engineer the open source app to connect our own deployment parameters. Use tech I have never used before. Connect frontend and backend. Handle dns bullshit. I have literally been working on Vibes and coffee for the past two weeks because ofcourse I ran into so many issues. Now I have an extension for Monday and I hate to fail. So I am not sleeping or resting just working on a fucking java app I didnt build and I am expected to make it work seemlessly on our production environment. I made some progress. Deployed frontend, deployed backend. Forgot to connect production dB so I decided to go with azure database for mysql driver since we have credits on azure. Now my java app is pissing itself over ssl handshake. I generate my keystore and add it and now java socket just times out. I want to pummel somebody or a punching bag that looks like my boss.

It seems Microsoft have taken my critique of Azure last week to heart. Last week, I insinuated that perhaps hometime on Friday was an inconvenient time of day for major downtime.

This week they've rectified their previous fault, and in their great mercy have decided to take down service at the busiest time of the day on Thursday instead.

One job I picked up was for an IoT Start Up. It was quite interesting work, reporting to the technical director, who was an electronics engineer, who was designing the hardware himself, they had a couple of firmware guys already, and just needed someone to take care of the software.
So they said they needed something in Azure that they could stream their data to and provide analytics for their clients. It had to be Azure, and it had to be Azure Native, and was to be Multi-client, as they had a deal with Microsoft to showcase how well Azure works in the IoT space at an exhibition/conference in 3 months time.
So I worked flat out for 3 months, on a whole variety of technology, from C++ to get the radio packets from their IoT chip, Python to run on the hub to take the data from the C++ and stream it to the cloud, Azure IoT Hubs in every continent to receive the data and store it an a Cosmos DB, and then Power BI analytics wrapped up in an Angular front end that the clients could log into.
Got it finished 2 days before the show, and they were so pleased I got flown business class to Singapore to be on the stand and talk to customers.
The first sign of trouble was when we arrived at the show to find we just had one of those little circular tables with two stools in the middle of the floor, about two feet across and no power.
No problem, I was able to sort that, swapping laptops in and out.
Microsoft were really happy with what we had, and couldn't believe I had thrown it all together in 3 months.
We picked up a potential customer for the system, a major Asian Telecoms company.
Then when we got home, the CEO swooped in. I had never met this guy before. Imagine one of the VC guys from Silicon Valley, or the CEO from the IT Crowd. You get the picture. Could talk the hind leg of a donkey, and real street smart, but no brains. He insisted on "taking it from here" and flew alone to strike the deal with the customer. Came back with an MOU in his pocket and said to me, their guys will be in touch with you.
Then I got a call. Can you send us the source code and tell us how what servers we have to run this on?
Um, its cloud native.
No, we can't use a cloud it has to be on our servers - your CEO told us that was no problem..
He hadn't even taken the trouble to find out what it was we had built, and what he was selling.

ALWAYS read warnings guys.
Story time !
A client of ours has a synchronization app (we wrote it) between his inhouse DB and our app. (No, no APIs on their end. It’s a schelduled task).
Because we didn’t want to ask them for logs every single time, the app writes logs to disk (normal) and in Applications Insights in Azure.
When needed, I can go in portal, get all logs for last execution in a nice CSV file.
Well, recently we added more logs (Some problems were impossible to track).
So client calls us : “problem with XXX”
Me : Goes to Azure, does the same manipulation as always. Dismiss a smaaaaaalish warning without reading. Study logs. Conclusion: “The XXX is not even in the logs, check your DB”.
Little I knew, the warning was telling me “Results are truncated at 10.000 lines”.
So client was right, I was wrong and I needed to develop a small app to get logs with more than 10.000 lines. (It’s per execution. Every 3 hours)

Just saw a role advertised for a front end developer. Skills required amongst other things·
· Integrating with middle-tier microservices such as NodeJS

· .NET Core (2.1+), C# 7.0+ and JAVA

· SQL Server, T-SQL, MySQL

· Azure Dev-ops

There are other standard and expected front end requirements but want someone with 4+ years experience

Salary £19,000 - less than two thirds of the national average salary for non UK folks.

Applications: 0

Hmm I wonder why

Go DevOps :)

A bit of backstory...

I have been the sole dev at my organization for awhile now (other two left for other jobs), so I have been maintaing and writing new code to support the business.

Our company was recently acquired by a larger entity and it has been very strange so far.

1. It has taken 5 weeks to acquire local admin rights on my own machine (I work remote) as well as a visual studio license.

2. We have known for a few weeks now we are getting a jr dev who will need the SAME procedures done on his machine/account and it has been two weeks now and nothing has been done. (Tickets have been put it - the issues have been escalated etc etc)

3. All of our code from our old company is in Azure Devops (which is connected to Azure AD) for some reason I haven't been able to add an external account (for my new account and org) to move the code elsewhere. I don't have the authority (I don't think) to place all of our code in a new location (GitHub,GitLab, self hosted solutions, etc)

4. All of our production VMs are billed through our old org located in Azure, so eventually that bill will stop being paid since we transitioned - I've brought this up to my manager (more non technical) who wasn't terribly worried about it.

5. I'm feeling slightly unfulfilled in this position. Earlier in my time here it was new and exciting, but there isn't much direction, not many goals, or interesting problems to solve.

Just wanted to express some issues that had been going on. Feel free to add ant feedback of suggestions 😄

Sure Amazon, 0.02$/GB * 0.000120 GB = 0.01$, not 0.0000024$, sure, that's right.

0.05$ for what amounts to less than 2MB of data transfer in total (there's two more lines like that in the bill).
Eat a bag of dicks.

Free tier my ass, if I wanted to spend money I'd rather use Azure.

Waiting for Azure to save an update...

I asked the VMware crew at work when we were going to virtualize our network. This was about 5 years ago. I got basically laughed at for suggesting it. I asked when we were going to adopt Azure AD to ensure us being ready for moving to teams etc. Got insults back with how bad the cloud is.

Guess what two projects are getting finalized now? Glad I left that company. Going to enjoy some nice mellow weed, enjoy my 30 day x-mas vacay and jump fresh at a new position. New upstart with a security maker for the maritime sector. A company that embraces new tech by making it them selfs. New day with aiding in the development of an IoT based solution with cloud support.

Happy holidays peeps.

I'm considering myself a Linux person. ATM I'm creating an Azure account to play around with their pipelines -- need that for my current task.

I feel filthy :(
Like doing a crime or smth...

I'll need a shower soon

Microsoft keeps changing the logo for Azure because it's an easier thing to fix than their shitty services.

Fuck Azure, Fuck Windows, Fuck Microsoft.

Half ass baked products in the market. Half the time there's no documentation. When there's a documentation it is so bad that it makes me feel like biting my teeth so hard that I am left with fucking pieces of incisors. My blood fucking boils whenever I need to deal with "POWER"shell. Fucking weaklings.

gitlab has some storage issues.
seems that East US 2 server in Azure is down
damn

Long time no rant from me. Sorry guys, has been a tough time for me.

Little background: I'm an apprentice and as such definitely not a fully trained professional. I'm working in a big company with people who have very let's say interesting ideas what I should be able to do.

This whole disaster begins shortly after I started my apprenticeship. I was offered to choose my first little project. "Something from the backlog, not very challenging and a nice beginner one. It's just about a PoC" ok, le me thinks. I choose to make a weather display.
Basic functionality was provided within the next 3 weeks. My direct boss (let's call him Jo) liked it and talked to his boss (Hugo) about it. Hugo was so excited he called our product manager to get my plugin into our software asap and began to think about where else we could use this.
This is where shit went downhill. Hugo told me it was my task to implement it on a totally different platform and to "host it in azure". I don't know much about azure and I never used it. I told him that I'd need time and some kind of sandbox to try and learn how things work. He promised but nothing ever came through. Not even Jo could do something about this.
They told me I should write this asap because "every customer would LOOOOVE this" and I honestly can't think of a way to meet all their requirements without access to our azure system/ sandbox. (There are a lot of requirements)
Am I wrong? Should I be able to do this? I'm a fucking trainee. I don't know everything.

AWS, Azure, Google Cloud or Digital Ocean?
Your views.

P.S: I'm noob.

GitHub Down, Must be Microsoft migrating to Azure !

What is happening?

Me setting up my first azure devops pipeline

Azure portal is all I hate about Windows in a single, convenient, accessible web page.

Worst part being there are some parts of my work requiring me to deal with it on a daily basis as there is no PowerShell equivalent command, nor any API I could use, to perform some tasks.

After a week of logs investigation, we finally found a solution for performance issue. Just scaled up the app vertically to the next tier plan in Azure.

Microsoft is going to offer it's own Linux distribution i.e. Azure sphere to secure microprocessor based gadgets.

Isn't Windows capable of doing it? 😜

Was delaying learning a course for quite a long time (felt boring). The finally got the stuff by reading the documentations !

Tell me I am not the only one who thinks reading documentations is way better than taking course (in case of proper documentation ofcourse)

One of the best feelings is when you're reviewing PRs, leave a comment of an issue you're seeing & another developer supports & agrees your comment, so the original creator of the PR doesn't think you're making things up.

"Expenses Graph of That Time I Tried Running Kubernetes On A Cloud Service" -2019, artist unknown (colorized)

If you look closely, you can get an impression of the moment of "screw this, I'll look at it some other time".

Hello NDC! Three days of conference, learning stuff, coffee, motivation, meeting people, coffee, good food, coffee!

I love NDC (Norwegian Developer Conference), it's my ninth time. I just watched Jon Skeet talk about C#8, up next is some Azure stuff. Anybody else here?

I don’t just want to learn how to scrap together applications.

I want to become an engineer; one that can wear that badge properly.

I spent a day or two reading my peers code base in .NET Core to start learning its wizarding ways. I found myself emulating some of the patterns.

Then I found a tutorial series on putting together a correctly decoupled RESTful API...the same chap wrote an SDK for Azure CosmoDB.

THIS is what I am talking about.

I can’t believe these guys at work have twenty years C# experience between them and they are churning out this shit for more than 1.5x my salary.

I want to become this but I swear half the coding world does NOT care.

Fact: we all rely way too much on other volatile systems for the sake of rapid development.

If aws, google cloud or azure ended tomorrow, our damn planes would fall out of the sky. I say that jokingly but for real, even the industry leaders refuse to scale out their own.

If SAP was to self destruct tomorrow, all these parent companies would implode and take their children companies with them.

I thinks the questions not even how but when.

Dear Microsoft power bi team.
Go fuck yourself. Put that dashboard up your ass. The documentation for this is a joke.

The doc says I can get my tokens from azure portal. But guess what. The portal is a sea. And seems like powerbi is moved out from portal to its own powerbi.fuckyoumicrosoft.com

What the actual fuck you dimwits. Why don't you document it properly ?
For fuck sake. Go show up your analytics deep into your pie chart.

I no longer work for a startup company. On Monday I’ll start work for a real company, one that values project managers and their infrastructure. As a DevOps engineer, I value the IT resources that power my old companies SaaS platform. My old position is not being back filled and they’re hiring a full time dev instead of and Ops engineer. They have chosen to proceed with zero employees who know Azure or the platform their own software runs on.

Word to the wise when choosing to work for a startup. Ask these questions:

- Do they have a dedicated product manager/owner , who isn’t also the CFO?

- Do they value infrastructure and their IT resources ?

- Do they have decent powered laptops to work with?

- Do they have too much technical debt because they’re always building new features ?

- Do they work 18 hour days because they set poor work/life boundaries ?

- Who handles Support tickets , and what’s a typical support issue like?

- Do they have a branching and merging strategy? Don’t accept “we’re too small” as an answer! It’s a trap that they don’t want one.

During 6 months I updated myself day and night on java, springboot and AWS.

I failed most of the technical interviews on my preferred stack, however I got a job, where the probable stack is C#, dotnet and Azure.

So, I have a couple of weeks of very good quality rant ahead.

I just started.

hmmm let's see, should I use Visual Studio or Visual Studio CODE. I spent the morning before understanding they were different. I could have spent the morning Studying how To Visually fuck you, lame name chooser.

Now I'm following a tutorial.
I need .NET 5.0, but guess what, I have .NET core 3.1.
But wait, fuck, .NET and .NET CORE are not the same thing! Will .net core 3.1 work for a .NET project or not?

And there goes the afternoon. Is he the same guy who choose the names?
I'll tie you with a barbed wire net and fuck you to the core, you asshole

I'm trying to deploy an Azure Function via Visual Studio. VS gives me this error:

Publish has encountered an error.
Publish has encountered an error. We were unable to determine the cause of the error. Check the output log for more details.

A diagnostic log has been written to the following location:
"C:\Users\myusername\AppData\Local\Temp\tmp16F8.tmp"

Let's check the log then!

"Microsoft.WebTools.Shared.Exceptions.WebToolsException: Publish has encountered an error. We were unable to determine the cause of the error. Check the output log for more details. "

Fucking piece of crap

FUCK YOU FUCKING AZURE FUCKING FUNCTIONS:

EITHER LIMIT MY NUMBER OF TCP CONNECTIONS (before violently crashing)

or

FORCE ME TO USE THE GODDAMN PORT-PISSING, BARELY-MULTITHREAD-USABLE, SETTINGS-IGNORING EXCUSE OF A PATHETIC BUILT-IN HTTPCLIENT ON FUCKING CRACK (Seriously .net people fix that shit).

But not both... both are not okay!

If your azure function just moderately uses outgoing Http requests you will inevitably be fucked up by the dreaded connection exhaustion error. ESPECIALLY if using consumption plans.

I Swear, every day i am that much closer to permanently swearing off everything cloud based in favor of VM's (OH BUT THEN YOU HAVE TO MAINTAIN THE VM's BOO HOO, I HAVE TO BABYSIT THE GODDAMN CLOUD INFRASTRUCTURE AS WELL AT LEAST I CAN LOG IN TO A VM TO FIX SHIT, fuck that noise)

I am in my happy place today. At least I'm having great success diving into minecraft modding on the side, that shit is FUN!

Open droid edit, ignore big ads at the bottom.

Open file, make small changes.

Save as.

Open andftp

Login to azure web app

Navigate to wwroot

Switch to device files

Go to .deployment folder

Select file

Upload.

Is it efficient? Fuck no.

Notepad++ style editing on the go? Fuck yes

There is nothing quite so arousing, than getting your own VPS and hosting your applications*

*Not including boobs.

!rant

I had a talk with my manager about my future role in the company. I had talked with him before about my interest to dive deeper in the technical side - rather than the business side, for which we have a higher dev demand.

The outcome is that I will work more closely with the senior devs on technical improvements and also tech strategy (e.g. implementation of code reviews). I will also advise the upcoming manager of the development team (who is coming from a PM position) on technical decisions. Lastly the roadmap for the company is to work more with cloud technology (azure), which is also going to be in my new duties.

I'm looking forward to these new challenges where I can improve myself on the technical side (yay!) rather than on the business side (which bored me).

Heya devRant people, I haven't been here for a while so I think I may have lost the touch with my rants. But no matter.

Ok, here I go.....

FUCK NUGET AND FUCK VISUAL STUDIO, THE FACT THAT IT KEEPS REDIRECTING A REFERENCE TO THE FUCKING AZURE SDK IS PISSING ME OFF. EVEN MORE SO THAT WHEN I RENAME THE FUCKING .DLL ON THE AZURE SDK SO IT DOESN'T REFERENCE IT, IT JUST DOeS NOT FUCKING RECOGNIZE ANY FUCKING .DLL I POINT IT TO, EVEN IF THE PATH IS CORRECT.

FIX YOUR SHIT MICROSOFT.

(Sorry for caps, I'm just really frustrated.)

Stupid pipeline bullshit.

Yeah i get it, it speeds up development/deployment time, but debugging this shit with secret variables/generated config and only viewable inside kubernetes after everything has been entered into the helm charts through Key Vaults in the pipeline just to see the docker image fail with "no such file found" or similar errors...

This means, a new commit, a new commit message, waiting for the docker build and push to finish, waiting for the release pipeline to trigger, a new helm chart release, waiting for kubernetes deployment and taking a look at the logs...

And another error which shouldn't happen.

Docker, fixes "it runs on my machine"
Kubernetes, fixes "it runs on my docker image"
Helm, fixes "it runs in my kubernetes cluster"

Why is this stuff always so unnecessarily hard to debug?!

I sure hope the devs appreciate my struggle with this... well guess what, they won't.

Anyways, weekend is near and my last day in this company is only four months away.

Well Done Azure...

The only thing I liked about windows after windows xp

I get this compliment when I just started to learn C# and wrote a class to convert DB time zone on azure windows and Linux app services.

“Wow, didn’t know you can convert nullable datetimeoffset this way, I’m going to use this class in rest of our Projects. “

It really boost my mood for weeks.

Monday morning and Microsoft goes down across the board

No office
No teams
No SharePoint
No azure
Not any fucking thing.

Well done ass hats, not like I had anything to do today 😓

Found a dumb mistake I made in a query in my project.
Reduced page load from 10 sec to < 1 sec with an hour's restructuring.
Had just assumed it was slow because of my super cheap Azure DB subscription... 🙄

Microsoft and their dev tools...

> Trying to login to Azure VM
> Get an error, saying that password needs to be changed before logging in the first time
> Head over to Azure portal, try resetting password
> Password reset is not successful. Reason: Account already exists (???)
> Google the error message. Found solution (coming from a Microsoft employee!): Create a new user, login with that, fix the password for user #1 inside the VM, then delete the new user

What's wrong with these people? 😂

Auto tuning for Azure SQL databases is cool but :
DON’T allow it to automatically drop indexes ! (My bad, I should’ve tested that before)
It dropped one of the most used indexes in the DB. Yep, just like that. 150+ timeout exceptions and customers going crazy

Aws Lambda and serverless framework. Yes FaaS is cool. Love it. But it is pain in ass when you have the only way for you deploy is zip the fucking code with all the dependencies. Comm'on AWS you can do better. Look at azure functions. Please give me a git deployment support. Please I beg. Each test iteration takes like for ever. Also no proper local emulator. Fuck you AWS. Fuck you serverless.

CI CD pipelines in my company... Having CICD suppose to help development... Now we have countless templates and tools (github actions, circle ci, agro, aws beanstalk, azure pipelines, serverless, terraforms, cloud formation, helm charts, ECR, Vault... and few more).

Total chaos, doing simple CICD for 1 api and 1 lambda took 3 days so far, and will take bit more.

On top of that, no one have idea which part of scripts are doing what exactly, as responsibilities are in different tools (each tool have different config files).

Does deployment have to be so complex? Or is it that my company DevOps team makes it so unnecessary complicated?

nobody :
Literally nobody :
Microsoft : Great news ! We added integrated blockchain in Azure SQL !

How about fixing :
performance issues
Stability issues
Reservations issues
Pricing
vCore counting

I won't be surprised if MS adds a "one click deploy" button in GitHub projects to Azure cloud soon, which sounds pretty cool.

I get some error when deleting an azure service so I put a support ticket asking for help. Just as I am about to close my computer for the day I receive an email saying:

"Product team will disable the account xxxxx from backend".

The xxxxx is our subscription number. The subscription that hosts not only that service but also production servers and databases, storage accounts containing backups, etc.

I replied to the email so hopefully disaster is avoided otherwise tomorrow wont be a happy day.

A client's representative (was an operations manager maybe; non technical guy) was explaining his legacy project (a knowledge transfer session), mentioned about using Azure for their new system.
One of the senior .net developer in the room interrupts this guy and asks "can you explain what do you mean by azure?"
I was like "what the fuck! did I hear it wrong"

Call with Customer for an upcoming software project (tone interpreted through rage)

them: "yeah we want to launch by end of march but our sales people would like to have a demo version asap, incl. structure of the forums and yaddayadda"

me: "earliest at end of feb"
them: "why do you need so long bro?"

me saying: "chill, we'll send you screenshots"

me (not saying): "because you ordered an azure based Active Directory as loginprovider at another company and our own white lable software needs to integrate that and we've never spoke about a demo version you mofos?"
me (also not saying): "and yet another partner that is working on the hardware component still hasn't logged into the API I crafted because he didn't knew how to send parameters to a REST API?"

Please tell me why my boss thinks instead of just implimenting a language picker, it's a good idea to:

1) store the browser's language option in the DB only for new users, but only the first time they log in, never again.

2) never give existing users the ability to change language, and just default them to English.

3) deal with all upcoming language change tickets by having devs manually do DB updates ON THE LIVE PROD DB.

I'm screaming.

Azure , AWS or Google Cloud ?!

Azure Sphere, Microsoft new OS but get this, With a Custom Linux Kernel 😍

What cloud service does DevRant use?

Aws Or Azure?
And how much do you pay a month for maintenance costs?

What tables to store data? MongoDB, dynamoDB, oracle?
Or S3 streams?

Just wondering.

There was a task to upgrade, refactor and rewrite azure functions project. It was assigned to guy who was about to leave the company. After 2 weeks at his last day at 16:50 he committed the changes. He literally copy pasted the old project into new file structure and left the building. FUCKING ASSHOLE.

Well well well.
Story time.

Since we are working from home for the past 4 months, I finally decided to install a Microsoft SQL server on my home server. (Mostly was using Azure)

My server is running Windows Server 2012 R2.
Tried installing SQL 2019 : fail, 2016 : Fail, 2012 : Fail. Some obscure message about some DLLs not being at right version. (And a warning that it is no recommended to install SQL server on domain controller, but I know, it is my home setup, not roduction)

“Ok fine, I’ll install it on my PC instead”. Windows 10 PC. NOPE. “Cannot install on a compressed drive”. Welp, wtf ? (Of course you cannot select destination install folder, I could’ve put it on another drive).

So here I am. Working 100% on Windows, installed Ubuntu server 20 LTS in Hyper-V, Installed Microsoft SQL server on it (BTW, install is very easy compared to windows). And that shit is working. And new “Terminal” app does support SSH out of box, no need to add Putty !

So as a Windows user, I needed Linux to make Microsoft SQL techno work.

Nothing will ever surprise me anymore. (BTW it’s fucking fast. I like SQL server on Linux)

Noticed another fellow dev vapes. Cool.

"I got Sparkling Grape, what flavour do you got?"

"Its...Azure Cloud...haha"

Haha ... still didn't tell me the flavour though...

In the end it's all about the money, sexy wife and a big house, doesn't matter you're on LAMP or MEAN, azure or aws.. Focus one and master it till you're rare in your area. My advise to freshman developer as a developer who believed he will be a mediocre developer forever.

- Implemented oauth1 - no body hashing
- URL contains credentials in plain text
- Used Azure API management feature as a proxy of the our API, however the documentation was on the our API, thus exposing the API URL with no management to developers.
- easy resource DDoSing because each trial user got a DB, the registration process did not have bot checks. You could literally freeze the db instance by spamming registration requests.

What the hell happened to the dotnet ecosystem in terms of stacktraces and async.

You used to be able to pin down your issues to the freaking exact line number using a stacktrace, but now im building a azure function and this is the crap im served when it blows up: How do you debug this?

azure web documentation

That wonderful moment when you explain a bunch of different technologies to a customer (thinking they'll work with you to choose one from the lot), and they go off, only to come back having cooked up some scheme in which they want you to have them all working together seamlessly.

Just needing to vent a bit...

We start off with classic asp.net & Xamarin. K.

Then we run into the shitshow that's lackluster documentation and heavy push for asp.net core.
Whatever, will just handroll things.

K. Azure is quickly turning expensive..
Well let's find alternatives.

Yeah, no Linux ain't gonna work.
Wanna shell out for a windows server? Nah.
K. Well, let's rewrite in asp.net core then.
Nginx proxy passthrough to kestrel. Ez.

Now.. wtf is the deal with mssql behaving like a turd on Linux?
Oh now some security jibber about telemetry and adding Microsoft keys to root.

Whatever. I can do PHP & MariaDB then.

1001 things wrong about Xamarin now.
Mostly performance related.
Especially cuz custom renderers for everything.
& Abused onPropertyChanged.

Uh la la, look at that sexy thing called react native.
Hippytyhop new tool for the job.

Ugh wee, what's this ? Customer impatient & deadline for months worth in Xamarin => 1 week.

Whelp I be fudge..

Can't create a new SQL database on Azure on on one subscription as every region is unavailable. Everything works on my other subscription.

Fucking hell.

"Unexpected token: ..."

Thank you Azure, very cool. Would you like to tell me where, how and why?

I’m an app developer and my company wants to take away admin rights on everybody’s PCs (Windows). I won’t even have the right to adjust my computer’s clock time. I’ve been working there for over a year and a half. There haven’t been any issues whatsoever, and now this. To be frank I’m a bit pissed about it. Nothing is on premise, the projects I’m working on are apps hosted with Azure / gitlab.
I’d be curious to hear about your experiences related to this topic. Also if you have any opinons against or for such measures, if be happy to hear.

Windows containers with Kubernetes on AWS and Azure are thing now.

What does that mean? Is it now possible to containerize system critical windows 3.1 legacy software from the 90ties (like the ticketing software at Airport Paris Orly) and orchestrate it in the cloud?

Do you know any use cases for Microsoft Windows in the cloud?

Today I investigated how one could build a Windows 10 VM.
We have an Azure subscription in our company (which is expensive enough), which gives me access to their new interface where it looked like I could build a Windows 10 VM. I was so happy that MS actually made this feature for developers, until I got redirected to the MSDN front-page telling me that you would need ANOTHER FUCKING SUBSCRIPTION to do that. This is fucked up. You pay for access to Office 365, then you pay for Azure and THEN you pay for MSDN just to pay for another Windows 10 license so you can test a simple Azure feature on Windows 10. How about nope.

#Azure #Swag

Fun fact: Many cloud provider will provide you free credits if you register without adding a payment method or using their services and wait for one or two days.

So...Microsoft is releasing a Linux based IoT OS. What does devRant community has to say about it?

Prediction: One of the things Microsoft will do to GitHub is to remove gh-pages and make sure you can host stuff on azure, since gh-pages only supports html files, so with azure, you can host a server-sided app.

Mfw on azure/iot conference, one presenter shows his certificate validation, to connect to all devices in his house:

return true;

He said:
"lets not be paranoid about security"

Updated my Azure aide project to ASP .NET Core 2.0.
Works perfectly in develop in Debug and Release.
Deploy to Azure.
502.5
No error logs, no feedback, no explanation.

K den.

Ayoooo, fuck you telstra you cock mongering assholes. What the fuck do we pay you for.

Seriously, a 20s DNS lookup time for azure services -.-

What’s your opinions on AWS, Azure, and whatever googles version is called. I’m curious and I’m asking because I don’t really know a lot of details. I just know they host stuff and make some stuff easier.

Accidentally cleared user accounts table that connects mobile apl accounts with main system accounts. Almost had a heart attack​ but luckily Azure had point in time restore 😌

iot+Android+Azure+mySQL+GoogleAPI+TwitterAPI

Oh, Only 1 bug. exterminate.

99 bugs.
Inserted 100 rows of wrong data into tables in a Loop.
RaspberryPi Burnt due to electrical feedback from the sensors.
Android phone froze.

Wow. I still have my sensors fine though.

Azure Devops doesn't deserve the right to call an error "unexpected"

Using Microsoft's docs for Azure is about as fun as Spreading Your Ass Cheeks for an incoming elephant dick.

I made a web project that can generate gifs from webcam. Can't complete it because I don't understand how to use SSL with Azure ☹️

The perks of working for a .NET shop:
1. 130€ of credit to burn on Azure every month, so I can run some long builds there, to have VPN/proxies for free that are not easily blacklisted and whatever else I can think of. Today I set up a VM for my wife to RDP into, so she doesn't have to do her job search on her company laptop (which is the only computer she has right now).

Has anyone had any experience in using Microsoft Azure for website hosting infrastructure? Would you recommend it?

When is this ever NOT the case ?

Add azure, AWS, Jenkins, docker, ui path

So I made a car configurator for a big car manufacturer.

it's working awesome on all devices except motherfucking chrome on ios.

The canvas does not resize completely after device rotation . and I can't even remote debug the shit.

So right now at 12 AM, alone in the office and deploying vorlonjs on Azure to remote debug the shit out of it.

Let's hope I can fix it.

I've spent so many years not coding, I could never get over the initial hump, which was definitely a mistake. Mistakes are fine, we all make them. The best thing is to learn from them. On the plus side I've learnt firewalls, Web hosting. Windows domains, Azure cloud, virtual machines etc etc, skills which are hopefully very useful for Dev to have. I look forward to joining the ranks of skilled developers. If you are interested in development but are afraid to take the leap. Just go for it, start to learn and play with it. My recommendation for anyone looking for a starting point is a Udemy course called "The Complete ASP.NET MVC 5 course". I'm not affiliated in any way or advertising it. I just think it's brilliant and you get to the fun stuff really quick. You will start with the basics of getting and setting up visual studio. Also. If anyone could recommend other very good courses they know of I would appreciate it

Worst week ever.

Servers are on fire. Respoinse times out of control

Some SIMPLE SQL queries (literaly select * from whatever where Id = id) timouts at 30 seconds.

No idea what's goining on (And I have full logs of all api calls and all DB queries). No way to find how to corelate this data.

Ok, I added 1000$/month on Azure and the problem is "masked", but not resolved.

I have dumps, I have logs I have everything, why the fuck I can't find the 1 or 2 APIs causing that ?!!!

Now I feel better.

Day 1 with Chromium OS: Inclusion of packages and stuff

Day 2 with Chromium OS: Setting up CI, and realize Azure is fucking gay because their own agents disconnects after 4 hours.

Just why.

Day 3 with Chromium OS: resolve their shitty problem, now their own agents have no disk space. I blame Google.

Day 4 with Chromium OS: Fix CI in at 10 commits, give up and cry.

Day 5 with Chromium OS: Realized Travis might stood a chance, build time limit reached, now I'm shook.

Day 6 with Chromium OS: Buried myself with endless tabs of Gentoo documentation. Lost count on when's the last time I came out of my room.

Today with Chromium OS: I blame Google for making my life suffer more than the last time I had depression.

Conclusion: Chromium OS is Gentoo with extra steps and I hate it

That awkward feel when I ran into an issue on one of Azures SDKs and find the pull request is open and not merged for a few months...

The even better feeling when I realise that particular product SME is _literally_ in the room behind me.

Chocolate is an alternative form if bribery right?

Azure DevOps pipelines unavailable === early beer

IBM Cloud seems to be the only cloud computing platform that has a responsive website.

Admittedly I have only used GCP and AWS, I haven't touched Azure yet. Both GCP and AWS have incredibly slow web portals that take ages to load after every single click.

IBM Cloud is the only cloud service platform when I clicked a button and it loaded the next page like a normal website. It honestly felt surreal to navigate through all of their services. I have no clue why AWS and GCP are both so bad, it reflects really poorly on their services. If they can't get their own web portals to run quickly, why should I expect their services to be fast and reliable?

I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. We brought on a vendor to provide us some fancy OCR tool. It barely works. It's been barely working. And the vendor is so adamant it works it's so difficult to get them to send people onsight to work with us. We complained about it to the exec and we got "Oh they're a tech startup. You have to help them along with developing their process blah blah blah". Well they don't want help we offered they keep existing their shit is top secret (and it works). When they make changes remotely it's like they blindly make a change and then throw it to us to test. When we can get them to come in they hang around till the problem is fixed (more than once we've had to tell them how to fix it.) and they fly as fast as they fucking can through the door. A guy on my team even built something similar backed by Azure but we were given directive to work with them. And now we're getting pressure about delays in launch. But it's not our fault. The vendors asshole lying CEO keeps making shit up and we're told to work with it. Yet it's our fault that we missed deadlines? fuck this place !!! fuck all of this !!!

I’m gonna lose my shit if Azure keep changing their shit one more time fucking pain in the ass

Ok so my thoughts on M$ officially buying github:

Honestly idk, it’s really up to them. I hope they think it really independent because otherwise they could abuse of the power they have over devs. So no added bonuses or free Azure if you develop for uwp or that kind of shit.

But it could also help GH get even better and include more the devs and all that stuff.

Lately, M$ has been becoming a little less evil and maybe they have a little of good will. What I think we need is a motto and clear guidelines for the development of gh. A community focused openness about development.

Anyway, I’m super tired and I should be sleeping, but I’m a dev and I don’t care.

I finally attempted php, I wrote a bunch of scripts to fetch data... I feel like I have betrayed myself 😞😞😞
I should have just absorbed the cost of azure 😭😭😭 now am a php dev.... The things I'm about to do, the horrors I'm about to put out into the world.... Pulling your hair out will be the least of your worries, dear maintainer forgive us all, always and forever. 😳

Azure. Its so vast has something for just about anything, and isn't crazy expensive if you implement whatever it is you're doing with cost in mind.

Used different features of it at old companies Storage (blob/table), service bus, application insights, app centre, event hub, functions etc...

Currently at a company that is slowly moving over to Azure which is a great process to be apart of. Get to spend a lot of time investigating what is available as it seems each and every time I come to use it, its grown substantially.

Who the fick asks for BPMN diagrams, Disaster Recovery diagrams and Business Continuity Plan for a SaaS product that is deployed in cloud (Azure) ??

This is a simple app/dashboard that just showcases some data in fancy charts. It shows the data YOU feed. Why do you need BPMN diagram? What am I supposed to put? "Client loads data" and "user sees data"?

I already linked Azure's page on DR. Do yiu want me to copy-paste the contents from that link?

Clients are too much PITA!!!

Looking to sharpen and pursue a SysAdmin/DevOps career, looking at online job offers to get the big picture of required skills and I say FUCK. It would take me a lifetime.
Azure, AWS, Google cloud platform.
CD tools: Ansible, Chef or Puppet
Scripting ninja with Python/Node and Shell/Power shell.
Linux & Windows administration
Mongo, MySQL and their relatives.
Networking, troubleshooting failure in disturbed systems
Familiarity with different stacks. Fuck. (Apache, nginx, etc..)
Monitoring infrastructure ( nagios, datadog .. )
CI tools: jenkins, maven, etc..
DB versioning: liquibase, flyway etc.
FUCK FUCK FUCK.
Are they looking for Voltron? FUCK YOU FROM THE DEEPEST LEVEL OF MY DEEP FUCK.

Fuck ms, fuck azure, fuck azure b2c, fuck azure b2b, fuck azure ad, fuck ms once again, fuck my company that decided to switch from another hell to this hell

Fuck Azure
Tried to login to my Test Environment for B2C, was asked for SMS AuthCode because of "suspicious activities" (haven't used it in weeks), gave this crap tool my number and pressed send code - no reaction, gave it the same number without a 0 in front, no reaction, pressed "didn't recevieved code" and got "you can't try again today, try it tomorrow" ... 30 minutes later two auth code sms arrived.

Fuck you Microsoft, just fucking fuck you

So the international shipment I was waiting for and was really excited were not the devrant stickers and was this useless and huge azure poster. I am crying. I was really looking forward to those stickers. What am I even supposed to do with this poster? Also I just realized I did not recieve any confirmation from devrant that I was receiving those stickers so that means I am not getting them. Why god why? @dfox please help me.

Why the hell are companies going to AWS and Azure instead of GCP??? I mean for Azure I understand compliance is a little easier with HIPAA and similar things but seriously.

GCP is so transparent about everything and it's simple for everyone.

What keeps me from loosing my sanity every day? A mentor who taught me the value of "nuke and pave" automation. Just nuked the entire Azure resource group, including virtual networks, subnets, virtual machines, vpn connections, the whole nine yards. Redeploy takes about 5 minutes.

Everybody wants Azure

We're switching to Azure

Aws or azure or Google cloud for big data stuff?

Is it doable to install macOS on a hypervisor on aws/google/azure and use it via VNC screensharing?

I finally managed to get my Wireguard setup to work in both ways! Beforehand I could ping from A to B, but not the other way around.

A network 10.1.0.0/16
B network 10.2.0.0/16
(both actually use multiple /24 subnets, but I reserve a /16 for each site for the sake of simplicity)

Lots of fiddling later this is my configuration:
A interface 10.1.199.1/32
A allowedIPs 10.2.0.0/16
B interface 10.2.199.1/32
B allowed IPs 10.1.0.0/16

ping from 10.1.1.1 to 10.2.1.1 => 172ms
ping from 10.2.1.1 to 10.1.1.1 => 172ms

it works, yay! now to add more sites...

Things nobody's supposed to do.

What are your favorite emoticons for working on automated cloud deployments or new open source integrations?

On an average, how many times a day does a dev think about offing themselves while working with azure cloud?

Why do companies spend the premium of Amazon EC2 and Azure Cloud when there are cheaper and probably better performing providers out there. I.e DigitalOcean or Vultr

Is it just me or is the free Azure VM absolutely slow AF?

Has anyone used Azure Machine Learning Studio? It can be so amusing. A friend's script wouldn't run once because of an error she encountered.
The error message read "No Error".

What is your experience with Azure and Azure DevOps?

I got a decent job offer but they are microsoft die-hards and use everything from M$.

Is it usable or is it making you angry?

I love Azure. But WHY do I need to add vCores SQL for more logs/io ?

Why is it even limited ?

So no, I won't add 350$/month for 1 more vCore just for some more Mbits of log io bandwich

Deployed first time on Azure and it really hard to deploy lots of changes/setting need to done before publishing website.

Fuck you azure and your goddamn swagger support. If you say that you support OAS than at least support the specification.

Trying to mock Azure storage was like a toxic relationship it gives a little bit of progress and hope to keep you around and goes back to the beginning and gets nowhere! Nope not doing it!

And I owe it to these words:

A great warrior knows when to quit!

I spent 3 days trying to do some azure devops work. Finally resolved to contacting support and their engineers resolved my issue in literally less than 15 mins.

This is a Microsoft support appréciation post. Twice they have saved me in mins after days of fumbling around and over engineering my ass off.

Way back no full stack. Now theres full stack and companies expect us also to be full stack + DevOps God that knows Azure, AWS, Jenkins, Docker, Ansible , puppet etc.

They want to save money and hire a one man IT department.

Full stack web and mobile developer with DevOps God skills.
Frontend = Angular React
Backend = Java Python
DB = NoSQL, MySQL, Firebase, Postgres

Before my vacation I’d been chatting with one of our dbas about an etl tool we needed for a customer we’d already signed all the contracts with saying we would provide one for a historical database of old data. They had been looking at one from SAP but in typical fashion a license was worth more than the actual contract.

Anyway long story short on the weekend before I went back to work I rattled together a little python proof of concept using a couple of azure databases and when I went back demo’d it to the pm and dba they loved it and we built on the poc to have a working loader which saved us about £30k by not buying the SAP product and just wrote our own.