Valentines day, other people buy flowers. I buy bread instead.

I've been buying a giant loaf of sour dough bread for years and my wife is just as happy.

Why buy flowers and see it die when you can eat bread. It's just makes more sense logically.

What the fuck has one of my clients been up to?! Every request he makes he suggests we might want to do it via a function.

"We need to ensure this is password protected. Maybe wrap the calls in a function."

I wander if he goes into the bakery and says, "I need a loaf of bread---use flour."

All I can think of is that someone influential in his life is an FP zealot and he's latched onto this word.

But, I quite like FP. Maybe I'll refactor everything to static classes to meet the requirement.

Hope to Christ he doesn't find out about HTML, etc. "Maybe add a CSS rule."

A programmer's wife sends him in a grocery store with instructions "Get a loaf of bread, and if they have eggs, get a dozen". He comes back with a dozen loaf of Bread and Tells her "They had eggs"

A wife asks her developer husband to go to the store and get a loaf of bread. She also says that if they have eggs, get a dozen.
He comes back with 12 loaves of bread.

I work with all sorts of sporty/adventurous people going hiking, climbing, running ironmans, travelling to the end of the world who won't eat the heel of the bread loaf.

Programmers logic:

Wife says to her husband to grab a loaf of bread, if they have eggs then grab half a dozen.

Husband goes out and comes back with half a dozen loaves of bread. The wife is fuming and asked why he'd bought so many. His reply "they had eggs?"