A lot of the people are complaining about working in inhumane conditions. I want to debunk some bullshit that I think is causing this.

Devs are hard to find. That makes you valuable. A good dev that actually works for 30-40 hours per week is extremely hard to find.
The relationship with your employer / client should be simple: you work, they pay. What you do NOT:
1. Do not take responsibility for other people's decisions
2. Do not internalize other people's problems (you've got your own, better stick to them)
3. Do not let ANYONE guilt trip you into anything that you're not indeed guilty of.
4. Do NOT work for an effective rate that's significantly lower than you know you can get elsewhere.

There are indeed some utterly evil assholes out there that will try to manipulate you, into thinking that you're "part of the project", or that "you're all a team". Yeah, you are, but when it comes to making money, you'll only get the salary, regardless of how successful your work will be. THEY have a motivation to stay up late, to work extra hours, etc. You DO NOT. If you do that, and don't get paid extra, you're working for free, which means that you're not a professional.

Are you a professional? Then have respect for yourself, and bill for every fucking second of your time. Don't let the assholes think they own you.

As a professional, you MUST do EXACTLY what you're paid to do. No more, no less. Well, if you're feeling good about it, then you can do slightly more. And anyone that's demanding more, basically has no respect for you, and doesn't consider you a professional. That is the plain truth. See it as it is, and handle those scumbags accordingly.

Bittersweet moment today, the interns last day was today, the improvements they made over the last 4 months, putting up with my “Gordon Ramsey” style attitude... definitely goes down in the books as one of best groups of freshman interns. They all truly thanked me for what they learned I sat them down and did a code review with them... but fooled them and showed them code they wrote 4 months ago.. they totally forgot about.. and couldn’t believe it was their own code.. that’s the level professionalism and improvement they made writing embedded software in 4 months.. they can’t wait to for next summer, neither can I.
Even had some of the electrical interns asking our department manager if they could switch to more software focused during their next rotation. Just so they can be under me.
I may be hard and a dick at time... but they learn! And it says a lot when you have college students impacted enough and see other students benefit so much that the “outsiders” wanna switch majors or focuses.!

When I interviewed with for an EA internship, they gave me a coding challenge after on GitHub. I tried it out and when I asked politely over email on the status of the challenge a week after, they rejected me with literally I shit you not "no :)". It wasn't even a answer to my question that makes sense. I was an underclassman so they probably didn't think it mattered that they were disrespectful to me. The lack of empathy and professionalism that truly proved to me what a toxic company they are. Any one have any horror stories like this?

I've fancied the thought of being petty enough to try for their interview again now that I've graduated and have more under my belt just to reject them with a :) but I'm not going to get down their level enough to do so

WTF is up with open-source projects using emojis in their commit messages... FUCKING emojis..

I get it, programming is fun and a hobby to many, but can we also keep at least a minimum level of professionalism here.

WTF is a wheelchair or bento emoji at the beginning of a commit message supposed to mean? Why the hell even bother to use it in the first place? There is no fucking reason for this retarded shit.

Is this what happens when activist developers get out of their way to make programming "inclusive"?

It is your personal project and so if you want to use emojis it is OK, I respect that (not really) but I can't trust your code, your commitment, or the quality of your work if I see those dumb Unicode characters there.

Git commit messages are not a game. Be playful with comments in code or your readme.md file but git messages should be a clear reflection of the changes not what a teenager's phone vomited on the keyboard.

One of the people I supervise is “Mary,” a woman in her early 20s. Every time she gets critical feedback (even very mild and accompanied by praise), she turns bright red and starts crying … like, a lot. Tears streaming down her face. Other than that, though, she responds calmly and rationally. She carries a handkerchief and just mops up the tears and continues the conversation. One of the first times this happened, I asked if she was okay, and she said that it’s “just a physical response to stress” and confided that she’s getting cognitive behavioral therapy to learn to control it. Honestly, I think she’s handling the whole thing with a lot of professionalism and maturity.

I am her direct supervisor, but she also reports to two of my (male) colleagues, one of whom is a VP in my company. I recently overheard them talking about Mary, saying that her crying is uncomfortable, unprofessional, and “stupid.” Mary is a great employee, and I want to do whatever I can to protect her job and reputation within the company. Should I say something to my colleagues? Should I advise her to say something?

Uncle Bob says:
Software Craftsmanship is not about glory and rockstar status. It’s not about being the overtime hero, or the last minute cowboy. Rather it is about discipline, professionalism, and the desire to constantly improve.

Best mentoring advice I've gotten:

In your career you'll meet three kinds of people.
1) Nice people
2) Indifferent people
3) Not nice people

Treat them all in the same way. That's professionalism.

I just hate it when clients with no knowledge of developing says I'm looking for "more professional"

FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!

Somebody did that with dedication and you can't just call it that!!

SCREW YOU!!!
😡😡😡😡😡

I love it when companies take 3 weeks to reply to their mail.
I love it when said company plans in a meeting during a 3 hour period, any moment through which they could arrive and you have to be available for.

Additionally, I love seeing companies use an @gmail.com for their business mail. The professionalism just oozes off of a Gmail account, when it's used for business-related stuff.

I love this kind of professionalism. So professional, much business.

…

Get a fucking domain already. And MAINTAIN YOUR FUCKING MAIL!! And why the FUCK am I waiting for these incompetent motherfuckers to arrive already, for 90 bloody motherfucking minutes that are way overtime for me as I've been awake for fucking 18.5 hours already?! Fucking incompetent pieces of shit.

Context: we analyzed data from the past 10 years.

So the fuckface who calls himself head of research tried to put blame on me again, what a surprise. He asked for a tool what basically adds a lot of numbers together with some tweakable stuff, doesnt really matter. Now of course all the datanwas available already so i just grabbed it off of our api, and did the math thing. Then this turdnugget spends 4 literal weeks, tryna feed a local csv file into the program, because he 'wanted to change some values'. One, this isnt what we agreed on, he wanted the data from the original. When i told him this, he denied it so i had to dig out a year old email. Two, he never explicitly specified anything so i didnt use a local file because why the fuck would i do that. Three, i clearly told him that it pulls data from the server. Four, what the fuck does he wanna change past values for, getting ready for time travel? Five, he ranted for like 3 pages, when a change can be done by currentVal - changedVal + newVal, even a fucking 10 year old could figure that out. Also, when i allowed changes in a temporary api, he bitched about how the additional info, what was calculated from yet another original dataset, doesnt get updated, when he fucking just randimly changes values in the end set. Pinnacle of professionalism.

When the new keyboard you ordered arrives at work (it's for at home) and your team lead remarks 'that is a big dildo you got there'. I did fire back by asking him if he was jealous which led to sudden silence. Still disappointed in him, we do rib each other all the time but this feels sexist and inappropriate. I'm used to it and laugh it off but I'd still expected better of him.

When I see someone from the sticker club I always has to imagine the reaction of client at the first meeting on which he shows up with his laptop.
Professionalism < 0
Ridiculousness > 9000

I can only imagine what goes through clients’ tiny brains. Do they really think: “oh I know what will get shit done, insult the developer, his work, and demand things be fixed while saying the whole system is broken even though they have multiple times in the past demonstrated that it was either me using it wrong or an extremely quick and simple fix. I also have a problem with a few listed items in particular not the whole system, but I’m gonna insult everything.”

Fucking rude fucks!

"Architect"(A) - Hey, StrucN, we have a bit of a problem on the module you are working on (which the previous "developers" seem to have given it roofies)

Me: Okay, what seems to be the problem?

A: There is a need to add some functionality to it, we need you to ...

Me: I see, well it can be done but it wouldn't be so simple - the module is a mess and the change would need to be well tested

A: I fear the clients deadline is for tomorrow

Me: Well he'll have to wait, rushing it is the worst possible option

A: I'll talk to him about it, thanks

After around half an hour A rushes back

A: Hey I passed a ticket to you about the additions we spoke about, it should be ready for tomorrow

Me: It won't be ready, it's too complex to complete is in such a shirt notice (considering it's already the end of the day and all the changes need to be pushed tommorow to prod)

A: I know *programmer from useless team B* did something similar so as it is close to what we need you should copy it.

My inner voice: FUCK YOU YOU USELESS FUCKING CUNT! THERE SHOULDN'T BE ANY COPY PASTE SHIT FROM SOME UNRELATED MODULE! YOU SHIT STAINED MEAT BAG ALREADY DID SUCH A SIN IN THE PAST AND I HAD TO FIX ALL OF IT. THE MODULE SHOULDN'T SUFFER ANY MORE AS IT IS ALREADY A GODDAMN RAPE VICTIM!

WHERE DID PROPER PROFESSIONALISM WENT? WHY IS IT THE INDUSTRY FILLED WITH STUPID WANNA BE "ARCHITECTS" WHILE OTHER MORE COMPETENT FOLK SHOULD ALWAYS BE IGNORED BECAUSE IT'S ALWAYS SHOULD BE READY FOR TOMMOROW?!

For fucks sake I miss my old Architect, he could really understand the essence of program development

I opened an issue on a repo telling the owner that placing a "test passing" badge on the readme but not having other tests than an "ExampleTest" and no tests of the actual functionality is bad practice and what he thinks about updating the readme.

The result was a deletion (not close) of the issue and a ban from contributing (issues, PRs) on any of his projects.

And it was not some small "ten persons use this" project but a large boilerplate project with 2.4k github stars and over 800 forks. You would expect a little bit more professionalism of someone with that popularity.

I work in a team where I am the only person not belonging to the main company. We have been a year and 3 months working together and they still don't realise that I have very restricted access to many of the things related to the project. So every now and then, something breaks and we have a meeting where they all tell me how disappointed they are at me because I was responsible for that and then I try to show them how I could not possibly even access the information where it is stated that I was responsible for that thing. Or that that thing even existed.

And then, the move the conversation to why they won't pay for my ramping up. This is not ramping up, assholes, this is you allowing me to access the information I need to do my job as you want!

I really don't know what to do... Other than looking for another job

So, I am currently seeking opportunities at other companies. I randomly got a call on Thursday around 12pm from an unknown number and I was not able to take that call as I was in a meeting. Later on, after looking up that number on Truecaller, I found out that it’s a recruiter from a US-based firm that I had applied to earlier. I immediately tried to call that person again but she was not able to talk as she was in another meeting. I tried texting the recruiter asking for her availability but she didn’t respond. I called again and this time she got annoyed at me, saying that she will call me back if needed. Now, on the weekend I again tried to message her, asking when she is free for a conversation, she is acting high and mighty, saying that she will call me when we (the company) have interviews again (hinting that I have missed the opportunity and it’s my fault). Her passive-aggressive attitude seems to be coming because I didn’t take her earlier call— I did not deliberately avoid her call, I was in another meeting. I was not given any intimation that she is going to call me— let alone on a weekday at 12pm. My current company expects a high-level of professionalism and I intend to show the same level of professionalism in any future companies that I work with. This kind of dehumanization (mainly due to a power imbalance in top-down heirarchical structure) is why big companies have hard time retaining workers these days. And this company was not Google/Apple or anything remotely in the same league. So I seemed to have dodged a bullet there.

In C# you can open as many scopes wherever you want at whatever time you please. Nested within themselves, doesn't matter.

Use this to fuck with the other developers on your team. Fence off their evil code behind a thousand curly braces!

Or maybe jazz up your indentation, give the code a nice and bouncy flow!

Real story :

There's this one colleague, who was a very good friend of mine. Always helped me in everything. That one friend in the team, who shares a lot of stuff with you.

And she suddenly, turns offensive when it comes to professional things and mainly competitive stuff in the team.
She becomes a completely different person when I get recognition for something in the team or when I become popular in the team.

She has that feeling that she should always stay in the lime light.
When I steal the show by doing something good, she starts to show faces.
Decided that it is a unhealthy friendship, as the friend i knew is no longer a friend when it comes into professional behavior at work,
And it started reflecting a lot in our personal friendship, outside work too.

Decided to cut the friendship and only be colleagues.

Did the same happen to someone else? Did you lose a friend because of things like this?

I don't understand why there is such a hypocritic professionalism in tech industry.

In the careers page ,these companies show smiling people, party images , slides and shit. And while selecting resumes, they want to scan buzzwords to select a particular candidate and hate "actual" introductions.

Like, how would you like to meet someone in a bar , who introduces himself as " a super enthusiastic 10x engineer and a tech enthusiast with a knack of building scalable and industry recognized softwares in x tech for last y years". Dude, introduce yourself as a human not a bot.

There is a clear difference when we are talking about personal stuff and when we are talking about tech in real life, why not maintain that in your resume?

But no, just write a single sentence in first person p.o.v and next thing you know, you see tons of LinkedIn post about "how to write a 'professional' resume"

Imagine a time when a colleague contributes a shitty spaghetti of non-optimized code that neither use mnemonic variables nor conventional naming of functions, and you can imagine the dark hours of maintaining it and your fingers itch to fix it but you don't have the time and the responsibility too to do it. He doesn't listen to you and you feel bad to tell this to the boss as the colleague is also a friend you've known since college and is a good person otherwise. No options seems to give peace.

Most unprofessional experience at work?

Check out my previous rants. With so many, it would be difficult to pick just one.

Not sure if I've told this one before. 'Caleb' was part of a team responsible for migrating financial data from a legacy (DOS-based) system to our new system.
Because of our elevated security (and the data being plain text) Caleb had access to the entire company's payroll (including VP salary, bonuses, etc).
Solidifying my belief that that salaries should be private between the employee and the employer, Caleb discovered he was making considerably less than his peers (even a few devs that he had seniority over), and the green monster 'Jealosly' took over his professionalism. Caleb decided to tell everyone making the same and less than him, the salaries of the other (higher paid) devs, managers and VPs.
Nobody understood at the time, but these folks started to behave erratically , like showing up late, making comments like "Why should I document that? Make 'money bags' over there do it", etc and so on.

Soon at review time, Caleb decided to use his newly discovered ammunition to 'barter' for a higher salary by telling the manager if he didn't make $$$, he would send an email to the entire company containing everyone's salary.

The manager fired Caleb on the spot and escorted him out the building (Caleb never had chance to follow thru with that threat)

When word got out about Caleb's firing (and everybody knew why), those other employees started showing up on time and stopped complaining about doing their job.

I had a dream freelance job recently. It was a lot of a fun and I really wanted to continue to work there.

However it started to become apparent my manager was a mess. He would often turn up hungover and couldn’t follow conversation. When asked about docs he said he wouldn’t keep any documentation “so no one could take over”. The whole attitude and professionalism was awful.

Some days on release he (and another member of the team) would turn up to work four hours late as they’d been out the night before. I would absorb all of the impact. Technically I felt he was quite significantly junior than myself. Management saw, directors saw, no one did anything.

To cut a long story short - I raised it with HR, I was told unless I raised an “official grievance” nothing would be done. I asked if I could move - I was met with a shrug “we don’t know”

I eventually reached a point where I felt my only real power is to walk away.

I now have no confidence in HR at all. I don’t think I’ll ever involve or raise anything with them again. 😔

whining

So I'm sitting here, working my ass off developing something far above my current skills.

On the opposite side of the table sits relatively new guy, working as a part of support "department". Relatively new means that he's with the company for around 1 month.

The guy started speaking to me. I took off my headphones and listened, while still reading code. He told me about how he'll have to carry out the recruitment process for the support department today. And that he was told to present himself as a leader of the department, blah blah blah.

To be honest, I stopped listening at that moment. I got really pissed. And it's not because of the absolute lack of the professionalism of the company (srsly, make a new guy do recruitment work?). It's because I asked boss to get someone to help me half a year ago. He did employ around 3 new support people (4th today). But no one for me.

And he has the balls to tell me that I NEED to work harder to make it for deadline that he imposed. That he won't employ anyone new for me because new people could stole his "idea". Because MAYBE in a month one guy, a junior like me, will come back (he's on a break to finish his master thesis).

Product I'm working on is probably the main reason other companies are even buying the system he's reselling. As a student I'm working only half-time, so those deadlines are almost impossible.

I wonder how he'll manage if I'll get accepted for the work I'm currently applying.

2 things that piss me off as a professional developer doing contract work...

1. A fellow dev accepts a meeting invite, doesn’t show up and won’t pick up the phone.

2. A fellow dev taking a meeting in a noisy place with bad wifi.

This guy has now managed to pull #1 last week and #2 this week...

> Work with Spring Boot
> Find a bug in an official Spring Boot Plugin
> Open a GitHub issue offering to fix it yourself
> Wait a month
> "status: waiting for triage"

I love Pivotal Labs professionalism

Service based companies and Nepotism

In India, most IT companies hires their own family members. Even they promote their own family members. One of the my friend worked as dev he found that mostly his co workers are relatives of founder or managers. He told me that he understand if they get hired from some kind of references but that's not case here. Even HR is also family member of manager/founder. Most of this guys don't know any language. Even they don't have any kind of professionalism

Imagine that working on companies where your co-workers and HR is family members of managers and founder. Where you find help because everyone will against you because all are family members.

they deduct PF of workers who are not relatives and never pay tax to goverment. In india, most developers are desperate to get job because that's what education system and society taught them.

Hope startup culture will kill all these shitty companies

The company i work for is getting into scrum. Hired consultants, product owners and scrum masters. First action was 'lets spend 2 days in meetings estimating the rest of the project'.
Agile as fuck

So Mr. D is a lecturer at ENS Lyon and they think my application fro grad school is **interesting** and they want to have a virtual meeting with me. This is the first email of this genre that I receive without a thank you note.

However, I remember that I applied for a master's of Computer Science, NOT Fundamentals of it (Do I look like I have a death wish?). I thought, like all other universities that don't specify this bit, that I would choose my research interest there and pursue it. Also, I used my undergrad uni alumni email for the application, so why contact me using my Gmail? And what does he mean by saying my file was judged "interesting"?

I don't know, it feels both creepy and wrong. When people apply with an email address to your position/program, you use the same address to get in touch with them. Not anything else you scrapped out of the internet, right?

Interview horror show: The time I got ghosted after the first interview.

I shit you not, I waited and waited for a reply, and since they didn't give any respect, I didn't show them any back and never sent a follow-up.

Yeah, fucking clowns, I hope your company burns to the ground with that level of professionalism.

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A few days ago I took some time off at short notice to help someone close to me with their medical condition.
On the same day the CEO of the company made a request that only I could've fulfilled out of 12 devs so yesterday I was reprimanded for it.
Why don't companies do something to actively increase the bus factor on projects?

Sales guys in my company are unbelievable. They told client that my analysis algorithm runs for about one hour, so that is the time they have to wait for results. I asked if he actually asked what hardware do they have, and if they want all analysis done (its a complex algo) paralell, or just one by one.
Ofcoursenot.
Then I suggested to better ask these things, otherwise we end up reckt. Annnnd he said they will question our professionalism if we ask too much questions.
Ok so let me summarize. My algo needs to run maximum 1 hour long, regardless the actual functionality and input data, on any fcking hw you can imagine, or else i am not a pro. Mmmkay.

Last week I hired a friend of friend to work on my projects. Hes a young and friendly guy. However he never worked in actual office and it shows. During the meeting he brings his phone and in the middle of explaining he pulls out his phone to respond someone back. Basically lacks professionalism and has this young person cockiness where he thinks he is competent to handle everything while in reality last week he did 2-3 hours worth of work. I want to set up some boundaries but I dont want to seen as a harsh dictator. On the other hand Im paying him over the top even though he doesnt have skills, but the least I want to is a decent attitude and effort. How u would advice me to approach this and teach him to get his shit together? Im already becoming resentful and next week if he keeps treating his work like a school project I will let him go.

Im really trying to setup a nice environment for him to work at, I rented a nice office in a hub space and also bought entirely new laptop plus monitor setup for him to work. I even took him for drinks and lunches but for some reason I start to feel that hes taking that shit for granted and Im being too good.

Hes not proactive, it seems that he will do bare minimum that I give him.

My start up job got to spark. Problem I face is, completing things as soon as possible, problems are simple but even taking 2 days on something is a big thing. So, I'm just stuck doing lots of urgent tasks and I'm tired every other day because of this.
I don't want to meet people from my workplace as everyone is kind of workaholic and that also makes me not to do anything, I mean yeah, I can't handle stress, it's hell. Rather I want to work for a big company having interesting problems to solve and people who are professional and there to help you. Professionalism is not present here, managers are using bad words for their reportees, and that's a norm. My manager pinged me and literally said that I'm slow. WTH!!!

<%= fake.smile(@me) %>
<% my_real_feelings_path %>

Really curious:
After what amount of time after leaving your previous job, where you were deeply involved with client side infrastructure and deployment, would you expect the credentials to stop working / be changed ?

I should state that the credentials are not service accounts, but also not distinct for every dev / devops.

I might also add that the clients involved are courier services, service providers and ... Oh yeah ... A financial institution

Also everyone is based in the EU, so GDPR and all ...

Hello people i have this problem and i think it is serious because it happens chronically. I am trying to get the word out about business services that i offer, but immediately they think its a scam. They dont know what company it is, or what it offers, or if it even exists yet, but “it sounds like a scam” … ? Is it a scam or not?

Do not do this. Always verify the source of your information to its legitimate source to know that its legitimate. Do not quickly assume that its a scam because because your pancreas gurgled. Your organs cant tell u whether something is a scam.

By just assuming, u display unprofessionalism by making an ass of yourself in front of a real agency. U also make yourself more prone to real scams who can act like what u think is legitimate. U also lose any opportunities u could have had, because u had to be an ass when it was being offered to u. Dont do that.

you know one should tread very carefully when getting a business dealing out of friendship.

if their is a boss-employee dynamics in the business, as in you are the boss and they are being paid to work for you or vice versa, then during work , be prepared to take criticism constructively. as a friend, the relation is different, we say each other anything and it is laughed off, but during work, there is a matter of respect, seniority and professionalism.

another kind of dynamics are the freelance/favour relation where friend is giving you free/paid service/advice or vice versa. this is even more shittier situation and is almost always bound to fuck up.
- the guy receiving service will try to negotiate a better deal because friend factor ('you will take so much money from your homie?')
- the guy providing service will try to offer a bad deal because friend factor ('i know he trust me. let me offer him a bad quote as he don't know anything of this domain')
- the guy providing service may not consider the service/advice as priority because friends factor ('he is a homie. he can wait')
- the guy receiving service may not be satisfied with the product/offerring/guidance because friends factor ('you could have added this x feature too bro, i paid you')

overall friend factor sucks. somehow the boss-employee factor worked for me as i was careful after 1 bad attempt

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