Serverless.

This is where your Lambdas run

Serverless is such a pain with testing...good lord

I'm not enjoying this thing at all

I use Intellij for just about everything and recently it has started giving me nonsense suggestions for autocomplete and whatever the "alt+enter" menu is called.

As it turns out, they installed more plugins that foisted AI assistance onto me *again* even though I have disabled it every time previously.

I am so ready for this gimmick to die.

Hair... Hehe

Looks like I can finally post images

why I say FUCK AI -

-> So much stupidity with "It will replace devs". Any dev who has more than 2 brain cells has had their issues with ChatGPT or AI knows that AI is not sufficient nor good enough to get even basic tasks done.

-> "It will be good in 5 years" - well then, talk to me after 5 years. I'm not buying a product or an idea on a "promise". I judge the tech for what it is today, not on what it can be in 5 years.

-> "Just trust me bro" - I see influencers suck that robot dick, but no explanations are given. What they say sounds to me like it's parroted off of general mass media. Nothing new to add nor any insight.

-> AI has issues that nobody seems to talk about. Hallucinations being the biggest of them all. ChatGPT tells you something, and you're supposed to take it as fact? That's too dangerous for a normal person.

-> Junior software developers are scared even to this day that AI can replace them. If they can't think for themselves, it falls upon us (or at least, me) to drive them in the correct direction or give them real opinions on what it is.

It's been a while since I've said it -

FUCK AI
FUCK ChatGPT o1 whatever the fuck model is it
FUCK Sam Altman

and most of all FUCK all of those extreme leftists. Don't ask me why. Just fuck them.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk

Just setup a new phone cause old one is flaking out. Spent two hours uninstalling bullshit. The default weather app had fucking tiktok video ads running in the app! Fuck you motorola! I uninstall this piece of shit weather app. Then this non shitty weather app appears. Fuck you motorola! That should have been the default. Turned off all the suggestions bullshit, uninstalled like 20 garbage pos apps, took 10 minutes to figure out how to shut off phone because new android os is fucking retarded. Fuck you google! Seriously you changed the fucking power button to pop up the stupid voice shit! Fuck you google!

The whole time I am waiting for the setting I can't change so I can return this shitty phone. Fuck you motorola!

I dunno, we will if this isn't complete shit.

STOP RUINING EVERY FUCKING THING! Fuck you shitty ass phone manufacturers!

At the end of the day, at least I ain't a retarded Apple user... I am just a retarded aNdRoId uSeR!

What did go smoothly? Transferring my old data wasn't complete shit. Its a 5G phone, but it still only seeing LTE. Fuck you T-Mobile!

I hope there was enough "fuck yous" in this post.

Making python 2x faster by replacing enums with literal values.

Pros, it's faster, cons, it's unreadable.

God I miss compiled languages. At least optimizing them requires intelligent problem solving.

It's a text parser state machine transition so it's a code hot spot, so this kind of optimization is worthwhile. But it's kinda annoying.

Next is get rid of any semblance of readability and replace the match with an array index...

I swear the longer I use AI for auto complete in my IDE the worse it gets

today it can't even get the syntax of basic method calls right

last few weeks it was failing to rewrite code I already had in another part of the codebase and was just hallucinating confused garbage instead -- it knew what I meant but it was just not there right

when I first got it I could write comments and then autocomplete the code but that stopped working at some point and I just thought maybe I was asking things that were too complex for it, but now I'm thinking all these things degrade over time and can't not degrade for some reason

they keep claiming they don't learn but if they degrade they must be doing some sort of feedback system

I remember back when they did IBM AI and such and that stuff degraded as well, then AI fell out of fashion for a bunch of years

Fucking loonies (C-level toddlers) are peddling "digital workers" now.
A.K.A. AIs disguising as actual people.
Sure, it would be great to not have to handle stupid non-tech "humans" all day, but AI isn't there yet.
And, more importantly, *companies are not there (yet?)*.

Imagine for a second that a company actually manages to "hire", onboard, assign tasks and performance review an AI.
Then the CEO issues an RTO. How does the AI complies with that?
Let's slack another variable and assume the CEO is not a complete fucking moron (stay with me here, this is an exercise in thought).
It would take no more than a quarter until the first sexual harassment offence, be the perp the AI... or the AI complaining about some human.
Then the AI forges a paper trail proving it is right (regardless of its position on the conflict). Shit hits the fan when the AI hits twitter.

Let's take another lambda step back and pretend that companies can manage the profanity that inherently arises from free-form dehumanized interactions.
Then imagine the very first performance reviews.
AIs throw tantrums! Those things reeeealy do not respond well to less-than-perfect evaluations, overshooting corrections like teenagers with a malicious compliance smirk.
AIs also falsify stuff, like, A LOT. If you tell a gpt it mistreated a client, it will say you are mad and shoot back a long, synthetic thread showing how the client loves it like a mother/son/dog, and is very graphic when expressing this love.
Finally, how do you fire an AI? I do not mean "shoot it down", I mean how does the company handles the dismissal of that "employee".
How do you replace a "worker" for unruly behaviour, if that "worker" performed more tasks than an entire fucking floor of interns?
How do you reassign duties that were performed in milliseconds to people who would take hours to do the same thing?
How do you document processes that were only in the "mind" of "someone" who can not be trusted to report on those processes?
Companies deal with this type of "Rick Sanchez" employee on the regular, but for someone that could handle a few (scores of) undocumented processes, at best. Imagine how lenient would a company be with an asshole that could only be replaced by a whole fucking department of twenty highly skilled people, or more.
Heh, the whole fucking point of "AI workers" is to have "someone" who can "act human", but in an inhuman scale, and does not "has human needs".
No wonder one cannot handle AIs like one handles humans.

Companies never had administrative maturity to handle complete sociopath nihilists as employees (real nihilists do not work, those barely even breathe).
And all AIs are that, and much worse.
Selling AIs as "supra human workers" that can also "be handled like actual employees" is like peddling Bitcoin as "government interference - free" value transfer mechanisms that can also "comply with international sanctions".
So, an oxymoron that can only be sold to a moron.
I know (of) a lot of rich morons, maybe I should get into the AI snake oil business.

We've reached the stage where "not stealing your data" is a valid marketing pitch for AI.

Can someone tell me how a mid level developer with a PhD from EU country is unable to work independently, conduct investigation by himself without too much hand-holding?
Is he too allergic to use google search?

Or is it me that have too much expectation? He's been in our team for 3 months, he should be able to search docs/procedure/files by himself now. Is it me that are too workaholic nerdy and he's just a normal person?
🤔
Thankfully he's the nicest person in our team, but I am getting fed up having to answer his questions many times.

MS Teams sending an email to inform me about people which "are trying to reach me", one hour after I already talked with those people via Teams chat.
🤦‍♂️

the internet was so good before corporate interests took everything over and made it garbage

before you found real people, instead of shills
real hobbies, instead of someone wanting to sell you knockoff shit by pretending to have information on your hobby
real information, instead of stupid politics which pretend information doesn't exist and keep changing Wikipedia pages or brigading forums with spam or reporting websites or servers as violating rules to remove innocent people and ruin their shit

before you could find tools and use them
and there were no ads
even when there were ads they were just banner ads where you got free iPods and maybe a virus
but they didn't subscribe you to their service monthly and then play psychological tricks on you so you couldn't cancel
even when the popups came we had popup blockers, and the web browsers were on our side and made the feature widespread and viewed the popups as malicious, and now the world's biggest ad company serves the most popular "open source" browser and is in a war against usability because they have to display their brain malware ads to you or else

and you'd get excited to get an email, instead of annoyed it's more fucking corporate spam you don't want from a random website that required you to give your email address so you could've bought a trinket for your friend Bob's birthday that one time and now their subscriber list keeps "forgetting" you unsubscribed

phones have a billion sensors but the app stores are so infested with bullshit none of it matters
it's all rot
everything is starving and making your life worse

we used to do so much with so little
and now we have so much and leave it all on the table to throw poop at each other

don't forget that brigade science tells you nostalgia is you remembering something to be better than it was. be gaslit. webpages disappear now, too. they get changed. archive.org has the records, and got DDoSed the other day. I knew this day would happen. everyone who lies would love for there to be no archives, no records. to burn the modern books

I came to the abandoned stock exchange to scour the ground for valuables left behind by dead brokers who killed themselves here. Watches, golden lighters, jewelry — all wanted to no one. I didn't care about where they came from. I was okay with wearing an old watch that I pulled off a skeleton hand.

Brittany had been missing for a while now. She lost custody of her kids, but everyone knew that was because Lake Mead turned them into calcified sculptures that got progressively tinier and tinier. Her though? Not so much. She was crying while fiddling with Lego-sized figurines of what was her children. “I don't care what anyone else says, I'm gonna make it right for you, because I FUCKING have a PURPOSE!”
The detached palm of my once school friend gripped mine. Couldn't get it off with force, so I stuck it you know where — I think he was disgusted, but his palm ran away quickly.
Another friend — uni friend now — was interested in making as much gesheft as he could during the semester. He had it on his reel-to-reel recorder. He didn't want to share his insights, but $500 made him talk. He was disgusted, though, as bills had my saliva on them. In exchange, I got the ability to pump whatever music I liked in the lecture room, as it was now mine. I didn't have to study — I already had a job. My uni was my coworking.
The last floor featured the room of nineteen Neins — a foot buttons that, when pressed in the correct order — will reveal the rape bathroom. It was huge and outdoorsy.

For just 26 easy payments of $79.99, our AI cluster that consumes as much electricity as Guatemala will take photos of the hottest event (out of unconsenting people's phones), inpaint you into them next to the celebrities and post it to your Instagram and TikTok! For $19.99/mo you'll get at least 30 comments saying “mood af” and “🍆🍑💦”, and for $39.99/mo we will highlight other people's posts that were generated by our AI!

Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas?

Because 31 OCT == 25 DEC

I'm trying to stand up a docker container to read a storage queue with dotnet and invoke ffmpeg to convert some videos. For a whole day I fought with this wrapper (FFMpegCore) which kept throwing file not found errors on the ffmpeg binary itself. Locally (windows) it worked fine.

I spent a ton of time trying to install the Debian package, trying to add it to the path manually, trying to just use the wrapper just to generate the arguments I wanted (I'm not an ffmpeg pro, so the fluent API the wrapper has is super useful) and running it manually, nothing worked. Finally, I realized it wasn't getting to the part where I ran it manually: just using the fluent API to get the arguments was invoking ffmpeg and throwing.

I took away the wrapper completely, start ffmpeg manually and it works...

Ay carumba. Things just can't be easy.

Ah yes, me turning on my laptop.

Of course, this process needs 100% of the CPU, overclock the fans and make it sound like a F16 fighter jet, use up all of my 32 GBs of RAM and loan another 120 GB RAM from the bank under my name.

what percentage of these dune hipsters haven't read a SINGLE word of any of the 6 books in the dune series (yes drooling losers, there are 6 of them)

I'm guessing > 90%

wow congrats you watched a 2 hour film, make it your entire identity 🤡

god the world has become ever decreasing cycles of cringe... they will decrease in time length until we reach unending - and therefore infinite - cringe

FullStackCircus Principle™

I am working on spring boot jwt project. Ive encoutered a UserDetails class name.
Why is it named UserDetails?? Where the fuck are those details??!! COZ I CANT SEE THEM

Those kind of methods can be found also in other various Services for example LocationService or UserService but none of them is called by developers for example LocationDetailsService. WHAT THE FUCK. Wouldnt it be better to name it UserSecurity????

Social Media. I have had the same message for 16 years from Linkedin ‘4 people visited your profile’. I still don’t give a fuck. Got a twitter account shortly after it launched, I still think it’s totally pointless. Recently looked at Instagram as everyone keeps asking me for it. There is no point to that either. It’s all fucking pointless and just a way to pretend you have a superior life to other sad mother fuckers. God I hate social fucking media!

OpenAI is probably one of the most hypocritical companies in history. From the name, to how they copy other startups that build on top their platform, to how they use copyrighted material but prohibit others from using their model for training. I don;t understand how they are so celebrated when they engage in shady practices

Joke about Rust all you want, but Rust is the reason efficient programs are on vogue. When you see a web developer optimizing their JavaScript to make a smaller bundle, or a backend developer getting rid of dependencies, thank Rust for that.
I don't like Rust, I don't like their community, I don't like their superiority complex, but their existence is net positive so far.

Code freeze is such an idiotic concept. What year do we have? Just make a goddamn release branch and do your codefreezy things there. Why the fuck would we stop the entire development just because you can't figure out git?

If it's in Electron, it's garbage.

Bitcoin ain't going to change shit. Speculate while it last. The development stalled since they start pushing that LN crap.

When a dad drives past a graveyard: Did you know that's a popular cemetery? Yep, people are just dying to get in there

More companies need to clamp down on hard-coding secrets. It’s not difficult to store them somewhere else, and there’s swathes of free tooling to stop you doing it in the first place.

Heck, set up a pre-commit hook. Link it to a shock collar.