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Mute your fucking microphones if you have nothing to say. Nobody wants to hear you breathing, your dog, a police car or whatever.16
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I want a name and a gun.
I've had my laptop for over 3 years now. Never, in these 3 years, have I installed Microsoft Teams on it.
I just turned my laptop on, and I now have the Ms Teams icon on my desktop, and Teams has started itself and is asking me to log in.
Control panel says it has been installed today.
I want somebody's head. And then smash it into a pulp with my bare hands and shove that up their ass.52 -
Other teams in my company are working with Angular 4 and NodeJS and my team is here working with JSF and Java 1.5.8
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You know what would be a great project? A reality TV show, like "Hell's Kitchen" or "Bar Rescue", but instead we come to companies and help their development teams. 😛9
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My workstation at incubation center, where i am currently incubated.
Finally got multi-screen desktop. Though monitors are prone to theft by other teams
bNEST, Bhopal
PS - Laptop is for gaming
7 -
In college, teacher teams us with other guy,
I tell him to do backend coding in JS
He says: Dude, What is JS?
Fu*k7 -
Slack: A tool for teams to collaborate and work efficiently
Instead
Slack: A way to share memes at work
Advice... Don't open slack at work 😂3 -
Asked my boss if I could get a promotion... He said I will get the job I deserve and make me CNEO.
When I asked what this is about, he said "Chief Nullpointer Exception Officer"....1 -
Tech startups, an analogy:
After 18 years going from help desk teams to NOC teams, telecom engineering and all manner of startups in between I have concluded the following:
Imagine wanting to start an aerospace company because you know how to fold a paper airplane, but not how to actually design and engineer an actual craft that will pass basic air worthiness checks.
That’s 99% of “tech” companies.
Discuss. I’ll make drinks.9 -
Project coordinator blames our team because client said we failed to "align" with other teams.
Coordinator.
Project. Coordinator.
What the actual fuck.2 -
I asked my manager for a compensation adjustment today since my peers at the same tenure and experience as me were making $30,000 more than me. They said no since I haven't worked on any big projects yet and the projects that were big enough, I didn't do it by myself so they don't count.
I'm not sure if they know how software teams work... I'm pretty sure we make software for TEAMs...6 -
Okay, this is me panicking. We're switching to Microsoft Teams at work. This means that I will have to cut the Slack and switch to a fucking Microsoft solution for chat. Am I supposed to be worried?23
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We use MS Teams and I started a new team for the contract renewal. My preference was to continue with the old one for files and searching. I am the “owner” and the PM is the “owner”. Everyone else is a “member”. Owner means admin. The executive sees that she is a mere member and demands the PM add her as an owner. He makes her an owner. Then she decides that she outranks is and should be the only owner. We discover this because we can’t on-board a new person on the team or configure build notifications or GitHub code review notifications.
Basically the executive has stopped the team from using Teams because her ego tells her that she is the one true “owner.”5 -
This was found when one of my teams old workstations was being pulled apart. Can't tell if genius or lazy.
14 -
Microsoft Teams has stickers, with a “meme” category.
And yes it is just as awful as you'd expect...
16 -
Fuck you and your bullshit Teams meetings.
I hope you die a painful and slow death while your servers burst in flames and you hang yourselves.
You schedule 4 of them, then bitch about how developers aren’t getting any work done.
Maybe if you didn’t suffocate them with your bullshit meetings they would.
I am looking forward for the contract to expire or in this project so I can finally get some peace.
Fuck your stupid meetings. You deserve to be arrested and shot by the Gestapo (or KGB, whichever you find more evil).
16 -
*phone dings*
Manager: Please share the timelines for feature X
Me: *swiping away the Teams notification* Please get a life and stop texting your engineers at 9 PM5 -
Have you ever checked your Teams logs??!
It even logs mouse/keyboard and window activity...
And reports it to your employer with fucking colorfull dashboards. Fuck them...22 -
Got an error trying to [Leave] a meeting in Teams
*sigh....*
Just Teams being Teams...
Now I'm probably stuck in that meeting somewhere deep in MS's servers forever.
4 -
My favorite thing is my nerf gun. In my office different teams are organized in different pods. You never know when a war will break out between the teams, you need to be able to defend yourself! Also not bad for getting someone's attention who has headphones on...
3 -
Things like that just don't happen on Linux...
Why can't I kill Microsoft Teams when it's frozen!? WTF Microsoft? This software is so lacking I can't even...
13 -
I hate Skype for Business with a passion. It's the most garbage useless chat program imaginable. It can barely send basic text chats without throwing an error, and it can almost never send an image without the upload failing. The fact that it can't even save conversation history for each of your chats within Skype is ridiculous -- it fucking saves the conversation as an email draft in Outlook. Come on Microsoft, why do I have to open a completely separate program to view conversation history?! Skype conversation history should be saved IN SKYPE! Fucking AIM was able to save conversation history. I've tried multiple times to get the company to move to Slack or Teams, and for some reason they think that Skype is a good program and they ignore the fact that it's completely useless. It's 2019, why are we using a program that's built like it's 2009? I swear they haven't updated Skype at all in the last decade20
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In the past, we used skype, hipchat, slack and now ... Microsoft Teams. What a tool.
Yes Teams, it makes total sense to tell me that my message is too long. I totally get it that you want me to rewrite my message and yes Teams, I should have rather attached it as a file to my message to begin with. Yes Teams, I wait for you to finish uploading those files before I can send the message. I'm sure there would be disastrous consequences if you send the message with my attached files as soon as you finished uploading. I don't even want to be productive. Thanks for helping me out.6 -
Return to office, return of the haikus:
Returned to office.
Time for the daily standup
On Microsoft Teams. 😒1 -
To the coworkers who won't read this -- If you have a question to message me, type the QUESTION ITSELF. Don't coyly request permission to ask me a question because you're worried you'll bother me, that just turns it into TWO questions. Let us put an end to saying 'hey, can I ask you a question' and then virtually walking away.9
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Hot take: Windows 11 is just to enable them to bake Teams into the OS like they did with IE.
They gotta get sued and split up this time! Their "Facetime" is skype and they had it preinstalled. Don't compare a business messenger to a private video chat platform!
I don't use slack, but they obviously wan't to win agains them by just making it part of the OS. This can't be legal!10 -
So guys, for those of you that know what a burn down chart is, this is my teams, aka Front-end ONLY for end of March.
7 -
Microsoft Teams can burn.
Who the fuck thought it would be an excellent workflow, when you want to COLLABORATE IN TEAMS between users in different domains, that each sorry bastard needs to manually log in to a second Teams tenant and loose all the context from their main Teams tenant !?
On random occasions the fucking authentication token expires. I send messages to my team mate in another domain. Three days later I am pissed off because they don't answer. It turns out their authentication token has expired so when they are on their main tenant they don't get any notifications before they manually log in to our tenant as a guest. HOW FUCKING GREAT IS THAT AS A NOTIFICATION SYSTEM ??!
Would it be that fucking difficult to maintain a notification bar with all tenants and note with an exclamation mark or something REALLY FUCKING SIMPLE to hint about an expired token ? It's not like this is magic, Slack does it already.
FUCK !7 -
Microsoft Teams can burn.
Their latest feature ? Well, turns out that when I get notifications on mobile that I do not get on desktop BECAUSE I AM FUCKING INTERACTING WITH THE CHAT OR CHANNEL THAT SENDS ME MOBILE NOTIFICATION, the notifications do not clear themselves. Oh, no, that would be too smart.
So EACH FUCKING EVENING I sit and browse all the fucking notifications to see if there is anything noteworthy I need to act on, or if it is a dead notification from earlier today.
Dear Lord, Microsoft are fucking experts at TAKE A WORKING FEATURE AND BRAKE IT.14 -
Today I learned that the my new teams choice to use a mostly undocumented/unused framework over a well known/documented one was decided by a coin toss.2
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I once saved lives sending cpr teams to heart attack victims through an sms gateway platform.
This was amazing considering it was back in 2008 ;)11 -
My team is using Teams to share code snippets. And because I know they don't (know how to?) use git remotes, I have to share my code through Teams as well.11
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I swear I could sell my layout debugging to sports teams and colleges and cities stuff, they could use them as flags!
4 -
MS Teams sending an email to inform me about people which "are trying to reach me", one hour after I already talked with those people via Teams chat.
🤦♂️12 -
Building a product from scratch is a fucking nightmare.
Teams building such products should be given a green pass to the heaven.10 -
One thing every junior web developer learns is how to implement a login system.
They may not make it the most secure, but it works.
It boggles my mind how Microsoft still don't know how to make a login that works consistently.
Every Microsoft login page requires like 30 redirections to work.
The Teams app on my PC fails to login at least once a week, just because another Microsoft app is logged in using the same account (usually office), but Windows is not.
Microsoft needs to take it's head out of it's ass and BEG Google to teach them how to make a decent login system.4 -
Someone had a question on teams about a circular dependency warning they were getting. They found a work around that would allow it. Someone else responded with this
2 -
Slack is scared as hell about Microsoft Teams that is targeted to enterprise customers.
Did you hear about the full page newspapar ad they did?... Passive aggressive move by slack
5 -
When I see everyone is busy in MS Teams(in meeting) and I am not invited to irrelevant meetings anymore.
5 -
Had to program an entire ecommerce site for both a city soccer league and baseball league. Around 50 teams each. No planning or anything beforehand. They gave me around 4 days to complete the project. Once everything was squared away, of course they complained and said that half of the teams were wrong. So I had to stay until around 11 pm in the office fixing everything that Friday night. Of course everyone said it was my fault. I blame it on the lack of planning.4
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I cannot attend another 2 hours zoom meeting THAT COULD HAVE BEEN AN EMAIL!
I got PTSD every time I hear teams, skype, or zoom ringtones.7 -
The MS Teams SDK is bullshit. It's so half baked and comes with instructions like "you'll probably want a better implementation for production, good luck cause you'll have to write it yourself."
Oh and don't forget to cache your installations in a file called "notifications.json"
Deploying will create 2 app registrations (OIDC) and about 6 resources in Azure... But "you'll probably want to log to app insights in production"... So I hope you're very familiar with Bicep cause you'll have to figure out how to add that to your template properly and there are about 7 Bicep files to decipher and it doesn't create an app insights out of the box.
Probably written by an intern.2 -
Motivating and helping each other by forming small teams/pairs of devs who look after each other. No one likes to code alone14
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Fuck you cock sucking turd licking MS Teams.
What kind of assrat did code you into the marooned abomination you are?
I will take the timeachine and retroactively abort your devs.16 -
"Ability to work under pressure and work with cross functional teams to meet tight deadlines."
Nope. Nope.
Fuck the managers of whatever shithole you want to drag me to. Nope.1 -
I try to convince my boss to choose Slack and not Microsoft teams.
What's your opinion on these apps ?14 -
I fucking hate MS Teams!
I do not use it at all, but there is another company of our group that has it. At the beginning, I could just access the website and talk to them over there. Ok, the page was not good, but that used to work for me.
The last meeting I had with them, the web version did not exist anymore, they just made me install the app. Luckily there is an official Linux version, so I could install it. I got late to the meeting, but could make it.
Today I had a meeting with a client. Important stuff and Teams did not let me use it because I had no business account with Teams enabled on it.
I've tried to use one of my personal accounts, to create a new one, to enable Teams, I've clicked, enabled, allowed every single thing they asked, but I ended up on the Teams home page again or with Teams asking me to call people on Skype instead of using Teams.
I've managed to create a company on Microsoft account on which I had to be responsible to my workers (!?!?!?) and it finally opened the Teams app, but when I try to enter the client meeting link, it just opens the app with no error message at all.
Fuck Teams and fuck Microsoft!2 -
On call at 2100. Call at 2101. Co-worker off at 2100, call at 2059. Neither were problems with our infrastructure. They were with the callers' teams fucking up.2
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I mean... I'm not even trying to find reasons to complain about Microsoft or MS Teams. They find those reasons for me.
Out of the blue Teams stopped working. There is a button "Try again" and a link "Sign out".
The button works, but still I'm loaded into the same page.
The link is not even clickable... sooo.. emmm... How the fuck do I sign out then?????? [I know how to as I'm tech-savvy, but Margaret from accounting surely would have a hard time]
3 -
for FUCK's SAKE! Microsoft, STOP OVERRIDING CTRL+F IN YOUR WEB-TOOLS.
I know you can override it
I know you know how to make a fancy search module for your websites/tools (Teams, GH, etc.)
I know you think you're soooo hipp and cool by doing so
But for crying out loud, quit being an asshole and stop overriding ctrl+f.
If I want to search for a substring in a page, that means I want to search for a substring IN A FUCKING PAGE, not in just a section of a page you choose.
Fucking asshole!!
https://github.com/morrownr/8814au/...
right, try searching for a commit message "support kernel"
fucking plonkers6 -
For anyone using ms teams, prepare yourself for a ruined dark theme.
Fuckers have made it darker with more contrast 😩2 -
There's this one lead dev in our dpt who keeps posting pictures to our company's Teams 'general' channel with shit in the toilet after someone forgot to either flush or use the brush.
Caption usualy says "I don't mean to cause nausea to anyone, but we are all adults here and should know how to flush / use the toilet brush".
Does every company have this guy or are we the chosen ones?8 -
microsoft fucking teams.
why don't you just work like you should, huh??
every fucking day it seems to be the case, that you, you ugly little retarded fuckshit, are the fucking reason that my headset disconnects from its usb dongle and needs to be re-paired.
slack works like a charm, but you..?!
in-fucking-credible.9 -
So I just got off of a teams call which I suffered the classic BSOD part way through, a colleague tells me that the entire time I was disconnected waiting for my laptop to restart, my team's account was broadcasting a super loud jackhammer style racket to everyone else in the call 🤦🏼♂️ and of course nobody knew how to mute me so they sat in 3 minutes of what can only be described as noise 😂😂
I'm not sure whether to feel embarrassed to have caused the issue or to be annoyed that the software does something so random while I'm not even in the call or with a powered on laptop 🙈4 -
Why even is Microsoft Teams?
Why does it suck so bad? Why is it a memory hog? Why does the ELECTRON desktop app not have native ARM64 support neither on Windows nor macOS? Why is it even an Electron app? Why the web version does not work with Safari (then again, barely anything more complex than my portfolio site works on Safari)? Why is the UI from 2016? Why is it preinstalled with Windows 11? Why the pre-installed Windows 11 version is a completely different entity? Why the preinstalled Windows 11 version does not work with school/work version of Teams calls?10 -
Just Teams things...
Turns out Teams doesn't know how to properly copy an image. Oh well... Nothing new here
3 -
We have an open space at the office, and you can hear things people say in their teams meetings.
Most common question is: "When do you think you will be done with ... task?"2 -
A tech stack including Microsoft Teams, Apple Safari, and WordPress - all in the same project - might have been a red flag not to work with that agency5
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I haven't ranted since I joined my current job back in late 2018 because I've been in absolute bliss, extremely happy and feeling in the right place.
...And now here I am: due to some corporate shit we had to migrate from Slack to Teams and man TEAMS IS A SHIT.11 -
> Get told my teams products don't work
> I say file a ticket so we know and can assist
> No tickets filed after 4 weeks,
> Team still complains my teams products don't work
Who else has mindless complainers? -
Finally got my devRant Stickers!
Thanks David for fast delivery to Germany!
Hope you guys will remain successful!
-devRant rocks- 😎
1 -
Seriously I don't understand why companies are using Zoom. I still don't get the interest compared to Slack, Google Meet, or Teams20
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Broken teams,
define Agile principles in 2 lines :
Take 2X to your velocity,
and work 80hours a week ;)3 -
When you are switching teams and seems like everyone in the firm knows your next project except for you..
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That moment when you have to take over another person's work (coding) , because they go on vacation.
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MS Teams:
*Notification*: Bob sent you a message: "Hello netikras. Got a minute for a call? Andrew told me <...>"
Open up Teams, open chat with Bob. Last message received -- 2 weeks ago. Chat summary on the left (chats list) shows the last message was 2 minutes ago with "Hello netikras. Got a...."
Prolly just javascript failed to fetch the full message to display it in the chat.. refresh the Teams tab
Same thing.
How the f*ck do I read the full message? WHAT DID ANDREW TELL BOB????
Fucking Micro$oft... Ironically, the only thing they're good at is hardware. Well okay and the office suite.
Can't even make a working chat app that doesn't lose messages or doesn't behave like a three-headed dragon with multiple personalities in each head.4 -
I hate office politics so fucking much. Now that most people aren’t face to face and everything is over chat and voice calls, people seem to get very weird about things that might be said and blow things out of context. If you have anxiety disorder or something fuck off!! You’re stressing the shit out of me and it’s already Christmas so I’m already stressed the fuck out!3
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Gotta appreciate the grass so many developers fueled by the development teams despair
https://ign.com/articles/...
7 -
Why is Teams such a pile of shit? Slows my machine to a crawl and makes my fan go nuts whenever I'm on a call, has never heard of UX when it comes to chats and channels, and for some unknown fucking reason uses entirely different device config for livestreams.
Fuck you Microsoft. Only you could develop such a bloated, ugly abomination.4 -
I don't like that my team and my company uses Skype as the messaging tool for teams. There are no code highlighting when I need to share code snippet to devs!13
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In the mix for today: 5 devs testing MS Teams collaborative drawing for a GaphQL API project structure, with Halloween and coronavirus in mind
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I think they are afraid of me :)
Last time I pushed them harder than anyone ever did since their tools I have to rely on precisely were unstable. Now each time I ping their channel in Slack I get immediate ack responses from their manager and architects .
Nice :) -
Everyone in the gaming internet talking about how Microsoft's Activision Blizzard purchase will usher in a new age of improvements have never had to use teams.19
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Microsoft pls fix.
My company chose to use Microsoft Teams and uses various linux desktops.
Let's try Microsoft Teams.
A desktop app? Hell yeah. Let's try it.
Oh wait...
Microsoft delivers a Windows executable for linux users... Fuck
7 -
One of the colleagues I am close with is changing teams. They will still be around the company, in fact the office of the team they are going to is right by mine. It just sucks to lose a good developer and friend from the team.
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Whoever is doing the whole integration of OneDrive and Outlook and Teams and whatever else is inbound in that trashpile - go hang yourselves you fuckers
-
Who else hates Teams here? I really think it's one of the worst programs I have to use from time time. It's full of overly complicated features and bad UX design. Slack is soooo much better and more user-friendly.7
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Trying to get Pokemon Go running on iOS in Germany....
.... first time I regret not having an Android Phone 😫3 -
Internal users are the worst. They act like you owe them the world. STFU and read the goddamn documentation.4
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If you're filling a ticket on a team, make sure it includes EVERYTHING that is needed to complete the ticket so anyone on your team can complete it, not just the people with institutional knowledge.3
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I'm not one to shit on Windows, because I use it extensively in my daily life (Streaming, Gaming, Coding etc)
but I'm driven crazy by this fucking TEAMS app. It starts itself right after booting, doesn't want to close without me firing up Task manager and ending the process.
And in the "Startup" tab I've disabled it two times but it will just Enable it by itself. This is borderline criminal practice of writing software.
Are you saying I should just remove Teams?? Pfftt.. can't do that either. Joining a Teams link on the browser is so painful that it's better to just jam scissors into your eyeballs.
Fuck you, Microsoft. Sincerely.9 -
3 more workdays and then this nightmare of MS Teams will be over. I swear when Microsoft planned that they had a list of everything Slack did right and told the team if anything on that list was included they would be hung up by their unmentionables with fish hooks.5
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Hmm.. I've noticed a trend in teams at companies: they always seem to have similar personalities, rather than similar skills.
For example, if the team leader is a pathetic, pretentious, sarcastic, frigid, lifeless loser who pretends he's happy, then he usually has a herd of equally pathetic and frigid losers following him. I notice that every time I apply to a company that has such a group, they instantly disqualify me as a member. Interesting, interesting..
The same goes for a company that has down-to-earth people like myself, then the team is usually a down-to-earth manager and down-to-earth, warm-hearted colleagues.
It all makes sense now.3 -
Using M$ Teams on Ubuntu is a painful experience. Feel like setting up a VM just to run Teams the way I want to it run.6
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Omg fucking Microsoft Teams shit. Stop it with your auto pop op Emoji menu shit you utter cunts.
I just want to copy the bit of chat…not critique the fuck out of it
Why did our company sign up to this filthy mess? Cunt CTO taking backhanders…when he retires we will be left with this shit…what a wanker!9 -
I'm not sure if it's just here, but in my country dev teams are not very organized. Most teams i've seen have no sense of process and they overlook testing.1
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Do y'all use an OKR (Objectives and Key Results) process for your teams? What are your thoughts on it?3
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"agile" teams, changing scope, unrealistic deadlines, non-tech PMs...
So much fits into this category.2 -
Coaches know: it's all about the mindset!
Runtime exception? Mindset!
No video in Teams? Mindeset!
Money got stolen? Mindset!1 -
Now that I have to use Microsoft Teams chat, I don't find Slack that bad anymore. Teams doesn't support threads, source code is poorly formatted without any syntax highlighting, and emojis look shitty.11
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Teams
- start a message with a quote
- type '> ' for the quote field to appear
- type in your quote
- hit ENTER to escape the quote block and write the rest of the comment
- Teams starts a new quote block below the previous one. With every ENTER.
- Teams: "Gotcha, motherklucker! There's no escape now!"
And they say VIM is a trap...10 -
I was hired as a team lead. I'd only managed small online teams before but now it's an office job. Any books and articles on technical team leading you may suggest?5
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I asked a senior PM once if software developers were the hardest to work with. He said no, road construction teams are worse.3
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Best: come up with best idea to real world problem.
Worst: lose to teams who used all the sensors in the kit.... Their system didn't even solve a problem. -
Now, why would Teams calls only work on Chrome and not Firefox? Is anyone aware of any technology constraints, or is it just Microsoft being dicks?10
-
MS teams
- user activity status doesnt update properly
- your status stays as ONLINE even when 30 minutes afk or goes to AWAY after two minutes of being afk and stays that way after you started working again.
- status sometimes does not update in active chat window when person's status on the other side changes.
- sometimes, messages dont appear, until I click into the app and force it to update the status from away to active
- I/O
- One day everything works, suddenly next day your mike doesnt work. Then your audio is mute altogether. Or you suddenly start hearing yourself (echo). All without any configuration changes or restarting whatsoever.
- UI
- Happens so often... You get a new message in your active chat window and you have to SCROLL DOWN MANUALLY to see it!!!
- Coppied text from chat? HERE'S A TIMESTAMP AND A NAME OF THE SENDER AS WELL!!!!!
And Im not even mentioning the performance itself...
Srsly this app is horrendous2 -
In Microsoft Teams, once you paste a text with a link you can't remove it anymore. I'm trying it in all the ways6
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MS Teams is not my favourite app right now. To be honest, it has never been, and will most probably never be.4
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how to build the gif selection feature in microsoft teams?
remove all funny gifs that you would otherwise want to use
cringe5 -
Can we please invent a company where we don't have to endure the incessant ringing of Microsoft Teams? 🙉🔔 It's like a never-ending symphony of interruptions and distractions. I yearn for a peaceful workspace, free from the jarring sound of countless notifications. Let's build a world where productivity reigns, and Teams ringtones are banished forever! 🚫⏰12
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All Tech meetings: I think over 50% of people open the video and keep it on mute, 45% use it as background noise while they code, and maybe 5% of people actually pay attention.9
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Microsoft Teams logic when using it from Chrome on Linux:
Wanna have a team call with multiple people? Sure no problem, proceed.
Wanna have a direct call with one person? Hell no, we don't do that here!
Also lets just ignore the fact that you are actually running Google Chrome, you should really try out Windows and Edge.
2 -
Microsoft Teams 👎
Luckily most of our company uses Zoom, which is great UX-wise. But MS Teams... What a joke!
I've even been on a call with MS engineers for some Office integration support. Of course, they scheduled a Teams meeting. It was embarrassing how bad the quality and connections were. But likely they simply don't know any better...15 -
During the course of my career I've stumbled on like 6-7 people I've worked with and it was really great. Every now and then we meet up and chat how it'd be great to form a team again and work on something (we're all in different companies atm).
Lately we've been mentioning that even more and are considering whether to start working on a product/find clients and form an agency/join some other company.
We have experience with both outsource and products. Our profiles range from development, design, marketing, UX, HR, PM.
Any road we take has pros and cons. We're least fit to start on a product because we'd need more profiles, have to figure out finance and would probably have to work alongside our current jobs.
I've been thinking of writing a joint letter when I hear a company is opening up an office in our city. When that happens, usually whole teams are formed and most of the profiles I mentioned are needed.
Do you think that's even possible? Is there another way we're overseeing? Have you heard of or attempted something similar?
Any advice is truly appreciated.2 -
I am having a hard time to find a good chat for my work environment (Slack sucks). Since we have Office 365 subscription I thought to give Teams another go after 3 years.
Well, looks like it is going to wait another 3 years.
15 -
Whenever I hear "this <person> is going to work on <project>" I edit my "bus factor of 1" wiki page.
Teams work on projects. People work on teams.5 -
Isn't it fanbloodytastic when you switch dev teams and your former team mates start blaming you for broken builds?
Fortunately I had logs to cover my arse. F*** blameworthy company cultures. -
I have my first real deadline at a company. Yesterday. I hate deadlines :( At university I only affect me when missing deadlines. At a company, the whole teams gets affected.4
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Why the fuck does teams' meeting overlay automatically focus on the mute or webcam button, NOW I CAN ACCIDENTALLY TURN THEM ON
Time to dig into the settings3 -
I work as part of a small international team in a big corp , we work product quality of sorts but work closer to dev than qa , last week we found several giant issues and reported them in . Dev and Qa teams of said project are Indians . Meeting starts , two of my colleagues are indian as well , so dev , qa and all the other involved parties from india decided they should join in from the same conference room . My manager(he's a brit) presents the issues . Dev manager starts talking , qa manager talks over him , they start to formally yell at one another . One of them (couldn't figure out which one) started asking my two colleagues which one of them found these issues . At this point I had already passed a headphone to my ex-colleague who still sits next to me , he looks at me when he hears the question . I panic . Colleagues say they don't know (*phu* I didn't CC them in emails and my manager didn't tell them ) . My manager tells them to calm down , take responsibility and find solutions else he'll veto the product back into fullblown development . Other managers start growling and fighting again (more than 10 people were in the same room arguing) me and my ex-colleague decide to go take a coffee since I didn't have a saying in the meeting . We get back 10 minutes later , indians are still arguing over my manager trying to explain the issues a 4th time . I IM my manager and ask to drop the meeting , he gave me the ok and I dropped out, my head was hurting after an hour long meeting of angry indians arguing in a conference room and it kept hurting the whole day...yeah...meetings...fun time...
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This Pull Requests requires code reviews from four different teams, and most people in those teams are in timezones where they're already off work and I just started. 😩3
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Does anyone actually fucking know how certs and provisioning profiles work for large iOS teams without using the cancerous auto provision checkbox? Are we all just fucking it up all the time??3
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My company just pulled the trigger on wfh. They just sent out an email saying tomorrow's the last day any of the offices in the region are open. Come in and get your shit. See you on teams.
Most of us have been working from home for a while anyway but there's been a few holdouts wondering why no one's coming in. It'll be interesting to see their reaction. On teams. -
!rant
I find IT to be an amazing field. There are so many parts to it that take tremendous dedication to fully understand, yet, each part works together.
Teams of people dedicated their entire life to software development, which would be impossible if teams of people did not dedicated their entire life to the development of operating systems. That would be impossible if teams of people did not dedicated their entire life to integrating hardware and software. That again would be impossible if teams of people did not dedicated their entire life to electrical engineering.
I know I missed tons of subfields that link everything together, but just the massive amount of dedication and teamwork to make something as simple as a console application work properly is amazing. I wish I could understand it all and I hope everything will always be as easily accessible my entire life as it is now.2 -
8 months into a complex Agile project, managing multiple Scrum teams -
I still feel it would go much faster if I just do it myself.1 -
My role in teams meetings :
Admit someone in,
Stay quite the whole time,
Say thank you and bye louder when its finishing 😅😅9 -
when you go through 3 different teams and nobody can explain why a certain item is linked to a subscription and there's no linking row in any of the usual database tables
fml -
My company boss wants to reorganise the team structures drastically.
Currently we have different teams for each product. And in that team we have a lead, frontend and backend developers working in sync.
The boss wants to split the teams not based on product.. but based on technology / frontend backend. Then assign the members to products based on demand.
Not sure how that is gonna turn out..6 -
I hate meetings where we watch other teams yank each other’s dicks for an hour. We get it, you love your team. I don’t care. I have shit to do guys.
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do you have a CV driven software engineer(s) in your team/squad?
if yes, how do you deal with their dramatic changes in codebase every quarter?13 -
My team: please read that article about blameless postmortems, there's a lot we could take on board to improve team morale
My team extra-passive-aggressive at the first incident: why did you do that? That was never gonna work3 -
What is your preferred team size? Have you had a better experience working on a larger or smaller team?10
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Can't stand more unproductive teams/zoom meetings anymore!!!
Fck this pandemic crap, let me code in peace!!!3 -
Question:
in teams with backenders and frontenders, how do you guys coordinate introducing breaking changes to the API while the system is live ?15 -
The worst thing in any hackathon is coming at 3rd position and there is a prize for only the first two teams.
#Frustrated4 -
I'm at that point where I want to lash out at our team for not finishing a sprint. I've been doing the scrum master/dev role for months now and each sprint is incomplete since we have started the agile way.
Most of my team members are seasoned senior devs and my team's downfall are caused by not acting as a team. I'm the youngest in the team and have been acting as a babysitter for them.3 -
I hate the new Teams. It's showing a distracting red icon in the activity bar when someone's sent a chat. Then, when clicking the chat icon in Teams you'd expect it to take me there so I could reset the chat and make it stop showing that irritating red notification in the activity bar. But NO, nothing happens when clicking the chat icon. Useless UX to say the least! This is one of the main reasons why I never use Teams for chatting, and I only open the application for meetings and then immediately shut it down. How come Microsoft, that's been around for so fucking long, still haven't learnt to design consistent, user-friendly and distraction-free applications? I think the answer is: They don't give a shit.4
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Great my team just got dumped with all the other teams messes and incomplete work! Great sprint planning guys.
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I just missed our daily scrum because of Teams. Now, Microsoft in their infinite "wisdom" have decided to integrate Outlook calendar invites into Teams so any invitation shows up as a notification, looking like a red warning light as if something is seriously wrong. Then, when you click that notification you're lead astray, moving away from what you came there for. In my case, I'm only using Teams for online meetings, usually our daily scrum which is always located in the same chat room or whatever it's called. But once lost in the catacombs of Teams, it's just impossible to find my way back in this garbage heap of a UX. So instead, I tried to use the link in the recurrent calendar event for our daily scrums. This always used to work, but now it says "On hold". Teams is such a piece of junk, just like most M$ products nowadays. I've complained about Teams, Word and Outlook to my superiors, and suggested we'd replace them with better tools, but to no avail. They go like "We've paid a lot for these Microsoft licenses so we just have to continue using them". So, the logic is like...If we're paying for crap we're stuck with the crap. 🤔3
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MS Teams with multiple work accounts account swap flow:
1. Try to close the company-bound login modal 10x while being fast enough to also close the main Teams window.
2. Realize it's not gonna work, so login with the account you don't want to be on.
3. Have to type your phone pincode then accept the MS Authenticator login, and retype your pin code.
4. Finally logged in just to log back out and get the generic account choice modal so repeat step 2 & 3 with the correct account.1 -
Fucking hell! Why can‘t I block notifications for a specific conversation thread for a limited amount of time in Teams? I get spammed with shit that I don‘t care about but when I block it now, I will forget to unblock it later. 😡4
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Just a reminder guys especially who do agile(scrum). TEAMS SHOULD BE HIGHLY ALIGNED BUT LOOSELY COUPLED!5
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MS Teams suddenly not showing couple of days of message history. Just skipped. No blanks or anything. Messages not even that old, it's like 2 to 3 days ago. 🤬6
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Your freelance client wants you to build a Microsoft Teams clone, how much are you charging and how long would it take you?10
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Is there an AI that generates malware already?
No sarcasm, I really wonder it there is already a model that finds exploits and makes rootkits or something.
It could make red teams obsolete.4 -
I have a lot of meetings and that makes it difficult to answer my workphone. One guy has been calling me every single time I have a meeting and he never answers when I try to call back.
He can contact me through email, ticketing system or Teams, but nope, he keeps calling my phone.
I send him a message through Teams asking if he can tell what the issue is.
He tells me he will just call me via phone.. Why?! Even calling through Teams would be better! Just tell me what the issue is! -
What the fuck is going on with elementary OS 0.4 Loki?!
Its the worst performing OS I have ever used:
* login ==> just shows desktop wallpaper, no icons, no dock, no keyboard inputs, no shit!
* installs updates in background ==> ne keyboard inputs, no reaction at all
Wtf did you guys do, when changing to unbuntu?!8 -
After solving that production issue which people debugged the entire night.. feels like..
I am the eggman
I am the walrus
Teams like..
Goo goo goo job..
1 -
Whoever decided that working with exclusive check-outs with teams in TFS was a good idea should be shot. What an absolute ball-ache!1
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Handy postgres script for those on teams with folks who maybe don't write the best queries...
`SELECT pg_terminate_backend(pid) FROM pg_catalog.pg_stat_activity WHERE query_start < now() - interval '3 minutes'`
Pew pew... -
Can you guys let me know how microsoft teams is? Is it good, or is it polluted with fluff and garbage?15
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Why the hell do some teams use story points on bugs? I mean, there's a reason why they're called STORY points 😯
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Ops teams that are "assuring" stability of production by being the only ones who can click to deploy to Prod add no value.1
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Ever since MS Teams added the option to merge channels and chats together, every week they give me a new, differently phrased popup asking me if perhaps I considered having them separate instead. It's fucking hilarious, like a suitor who can't take no for an answer. I mean, it already contains a ton of dark patterns, they can just remove the feature again without my approval if they feel like it, but this miserable charade pretending to care about their users is frankly embarrassing.6
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My most disliked part about my job is one recurring event that happens way too often: waiting for other teams to do their fucking jobs so that I can do mine.1
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Do you have a db specialist in teams? I often see frontend & backend ranting but no db Devs. Isn't that role so crucial as one lost index can cause massive performance drops?5
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I wrote a bit about my experiences dealing with communication in remote teams, and how I'm trying to get better at it. #remote
https://monades.roperzh.com/getting...1 -
how many devs working in your company and (thats the actual question) how many leaders manages dev teams?3
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Scratch my last post. Do not disturb is not your best friend. Turning off your Teams is. When your colleagues suffocate you with calls, meetings and chats to the point you cannot focus on your own work. Send an e-mail to your manager and shut down your teams. That’s what I did2
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Junior Dev about 18months in my current job and I've got a problem
Started to feel not wanting to code at work, despite working on a greenfield project thats critical and using new tech. I get a little defensive about PR's over stupid small things (PR was once rejected due to auto indentation "not to standard").
Talked with boss (who I get on well with and like) and thinks my problem is I've lost confidence coding. Trys to get more senior Dev to on side to help me out more.
Same senior Dev is really close with other junior on my team - pair on alot of stuff all the time, have lunch and spend free time together, and will work way past working hours just to try and finish something that day (even though it's not due that day).
(Probs working ~60h weeks, where as I'm ~42h and contracted for 37h. I'll work on if I need to but tries to have balance)
Senior and other junior tend to ignore tickets on the board, do the work and then when I pick it up they say "I did that last night". No docs, no PR for me to ask about how it was done (as they merged it themselves). (They have previously completely refactored my branch in the past overnight then not told me atall)
I'm not saying its favouritism here, but I'm not happy with the situation. I feel I can't ask questions as they are always together or they discuss the problem themselves and just give me the answer (not really acknowledging my points). I dont tend to ask for help from this senior Dev now as I don't feel it's worthwhile learning wise for me.
Other people in the team are great but working on other aspects so not a direct one-to-one alignment (others are DB Dev & principal senior dev)
Furthermore I'm wanting to possibly work on full stack web or more architecture stuff, both which are not in my current teams remit (backend up to API).
So - what do I do? Try and remedy the situation in the current team as best as or look for a new teams as cut my losses.
I'm torn between the 2 and I'm unsure how to get out this rut. I feel I need to find a solution to this soon though
(Sorry for the long rant folks)4 -
They're re-working all the teams tomorrow. Hopefully i dont get put somewhere absolutely dead-end.
Wish me luck, boys.2 -
Gawd today was depressing, we started migrating to teams. I now know that everyone is a liar, everyone has been telling me it’s shit and that’s a blatant lie, it’s utterly shit, it’s an insult to shot to call teams shit.
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Today we finally launched Keycloak to secure our spring cloud microservice architecture!
Great feeling after 4 month of tailoring open source software, bug fixes and so much pain 😄 -
Simple 2fa code sharing dashboard for Teams
other solutions is charging 3$ per user/month... REALLY!!
I built one and shared to all ... FREEE
https://github.com/avicoder/...1 -
How does one get experience on working in teams if every project I've built has been solo because of a lack of developers from where I am from?4
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I swear it is easier to do a full-stack application all by yourself rather than make a front-end and a back-end newbie work alongside you in a way that justifies the pay being given to them by the project manager(for a freelance project).
Not that they are bad or anything, but it takes more effort to offload work to them with enough explanation to convey the expectations properly while accounting for the learning they are yet to do.1 -
Playing Overwatch for 4 hours straight when I was supposed to be working on my side project. What is worse that I am still golden ranked. Keep finding crappy teams :(
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So am I the only one that hates everything about the new Teams update? Tbf, the zooming function is cool. But I just want to use full screen.7
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I often get distracted by other incompetent teams and preach ddd and tdd to them instead of writing my own code1
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!rant
What is your opinion on StackOverflow Teams (https://stackoverflow.com/teams)?
I have mixed feelings! A mix of "oh god why!?" and "that might be a great tool!"1 -
Want to give money to an open source project ... I want give 20$ CAN ... ok the teams will receive 2€ ... Fuck canada3
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MS Teams markdown shortcuts are now broken for me and my whole org. Literally never happened with discord or slack. How is a company this big so bad at making good software?2
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So I have to mimic some codes that I was not given any explanation because it's from a team that is, like, the only one that does not like the others and we have to work with them.
All the teams do codes with similar coding rules
and then there is this team. Weirdly enough, they are the most strict on their rules. -
Why isn't Gooogle buying Atlassian to stock up G Suite with Wiki and Slack, then piss off Microsoft and win the Market over with better products?
Im reading everywhere now that MS Teams has the hugest Userbase and so much features to come bla bla bla
Fuck MS Teams, it's shit, looks like it and it's software so I can't smell it. Thank god for that, else it would smell like the afterback of a diaarhetic horse.
Every fucking Tecnician at my company is arguing, that MS Teams is better, because more users are active. WTF Poopface, they have more user, because it comes included with O365???
Our people are so stupid, I bet they won the IT Certification in a Lottery or flew to Turkey to buy it at a Bazaar.
And who the fuck are the Product Managers at Google, gonna hit them a couple of times with a broom to wake up. You fucktards are missing a huge market.7 -
Getting close to graduating and trying to find an internship and I just have one question;
Do project teams in the real world disappoint as much as project teams in college? Or will I actually have people who aren't brain-dead working alongside me?2 -
Teams annoys me again by selecting the black skin tone for this emoji 💪🏿 no matter what I try to do to select another tone or the neutral yellow tone.
Now my colleagues must think of me that I want to send some message or something… damn it Teams!
I need to go to the freaking iOS Teams client to be able to post 💪. The other one is the bullshit electron desktop client.11 -
In my company, we have been have been using skype, hipchat, slack and now Teams.
Yet somehow, email always survives.
I get it as a communication channel for external clients as everybody has an email.
Yet when you as a company are using a team messenger, well then use it as your primary communication tool NO EXCEPTIONS or don't use them at all.3 -
Which platform do you recommend for inter-team comm?
We were on skype, but it didn't allow threads.
We have now shifted to Microsoft Teams but some members aren't liking it because it does not have a native App for Linux.
Slack is paid, and we're already paying Microsoft for other features.
There are open source alternatives but we don't have a spare machine to host on...
Suggestions?10 -
Multiplayer 3D engine architects:
While building the inital engine of your team's renderer and network systems, what were the most helpful things members of your team could provide?1 -
Often the dymnamics of Dev teams are like high school cheer leading teams. You need Kevlar for your back. Some teams are toxic. Plan your escape if you are in that situation now. Change the game by learning marketable skills and move on. The market is less tight right now so make your move.
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Micro$oft: why every Teams mobile update do you TURN THIS OFF???
Making me go back and turn it back on.
Discord, Slack, and literally everyone else figured this out ages ago.
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You work in a team, for a team to move forward successfully the team should work in sync. A team always has a goal and a plan to get to it. There are times when the team needs to take a different direction therefore the set path should always be available for change because our environments dictate it.
We all have different styles of working and different opinions on how things should work. Sometimes one is wrong and the other is right, and sometimes both are wrong, or actually sometimes both are right. However, at the end of it all, the next step is a decision for the team, not an individual, and moving forward means doing it together. #KickAssTeam
The end result can not come in at the beginning but only at the end of an implementation and sometimes if you’re lucky, during implementation you can smell the shit before it hits the fan. So as humans, we will make mistakes at times by using the wrong decisions and when this happens, a strong team will pull things in the right direction quickly and together. #KickAssTeam
Having a team of different opinions does not mean not being able to work together. It actually means a strong team! #kickAssTeam However the challenging part means it can be a challenge. This calls for having processes in place that will allow the team members to be heard and for new knowledge to take lead. This space requires discipline in listening and interrogating opinions without attachment to ideas and always knowing that YOUR opinion is a suggestion, not a solution. Until it is taken on by the team. #KickAssTeam We all love our own thinking. However, learning to re-learn or change opinions when faced with new information should become as easy to take in and use.
Now, I am no expert at this however through my years of development I find this strategy to work in a team of developers. It’s a few questions you ask yourself before every commit, When faced with working in a new team and possibly as a suggestion when trying to align other team members with the team.
The point of this article, the questions to self!
Am I following the formatting standard set?
Is what I have written in line with official documentation?
Is what I am committing a technical conversion of the business requirement?
Have I duplicated functionality the framework already offers?
I have introduced a methodology, library, heavily reusable component to the system, have you had a discussion with the team before implementing?
Are your methods and functions truly responsible for 1 thing?
Will someone you will never get to talk to or your future self have documentation of your work?
Either via point number 2, domain-specific, or business requirements documentation.
Are you future thinking too much in your solution?
Will future proof have a great chance of complicating the current use case?
Remember, you can never write perfect code that cures every future problem, but what you can do perfectly is serve the current business problem you are facing and after doing that for decades, you would have had a perfect line of development success.1 -
My headset died today. Do you think "it's shipping" is a good enough reason to skip Mondays teams meeting or do I need to go find my cheapo spare headset from my attic3
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I mean, can even the folks at MS make sense of Teams..?
"Open Teams, select the Client's Teams and in the standup Team write a shoutout for the team"
damn it!2 -
Our team is splitting into two development teams.
What are some clever/catchy/funny team names you would suggest?16 -
I am SO TIRED of marketing teams imposing their tools to developers. I am TIRED of all those crappy old libraries or meaningless APIs2
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The Project Manager changed the project from scope driven to date driven with the teams giving him only t-shirt sizing estimates. Wish us luck...
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My previous company, used -
*Sametime for chats
*Cisco jabber for group chats and video conferencing
*Zoom for meetings
*Slack for community interaction
*And now they onboarded teams..
Hell fuck .. now since I use only teams for all .. I realise what i was doing2 -
Work from home..7 weeks..daily
meeting.start with using skype,then google meet,.after that zoom,after that microsoft teams and back to skype now..3 -
Yes, the bug is always on our side. Other teams are immaculate and they write the purest, most perfect code possible.
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The moment, when you wait for the clash of code at codingame to start, while surfing on the web......
"Oh it has already started.."
"Oh fuck! Its fastest code..."
😩 -
Every manager does *not* need a heavy process they are championing. They definitely don't need to be enforcing it on other teams that don't need those changes.1
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of course you can now make a vtuber avatar in microsoft teams but markdown support in chat is still is a clunky mess. #priorities
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That feeling when you notice, that you have a pokestop right infront of yout house😍....
.... Now I can catch Pokemons without leaving the house. Thank You Lure Modules! -
The greatest thing I ever do when work is pending from DevOps Teams, opening devRant app. Ever did the same?
#MyDaySucks -
Really taken aback after seeing my semester attendance is 93.43%. There was a time it uses to be 40%, online classes doing wonders.
@MicrosoftTeams -
So do you think this will finally mean we get a proper Linux version of this shit storm of an app?
https://theverge.com/2023/2/...9 -
Any recommendations for a chat service (like slack or teams) that offer an OUTGOING webhook? Slack does but it is unfortunately going to be deprecated soon which sucks6
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scaled agile day long planning meetings sitting around watching other teams point their pointables.
1 -
I've been assigned the task of contacting teams for Blind Code, Geek Quiz and Hackathon, by university's Olympiad team.
Wish me best of luck with @safiullah and @AhmadIshaq -
Like probably many engineers; I work with a lot of Indians from different companies. I realized the big majority of them don't turn on their cameras in online meetings. Does anyone know why?14
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Hey just release UpStamps (https://www.upstamps.com/).
UpStamps is a Feature Flag Management Platform to separate code from different environments and projects, this helps teams and developers deploy faster with less risk.
I want to know what you think and feedback is appreciated.
5 -
Does anyone know how to publish MS Teams app to the app source so that anyone can install it? MS Teams docs are shit and can't figure out the procedure for the submission. It's been 2 days since I reached out to their support team and no response yet.
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When a developer refers to everyone on the team as family and you're thinking the complete & total opposite.
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I need figure out a way to work managing my fantasy football teams into my sprints this year, or were going to lose again.
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mixed feelings about running around trying to shuffle bugs and shit over to the teams that own whatever is having problems2
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Is anyone aware of planning methodologies related to estimating a teams support capacity? I’m getting tired of working on a team that builds more than it can ever possibly support.
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