Details
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AboutI'm a noob. I'd probably just use this for lurking.
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SkillsPython, JavaScript, PHP, ISO 9001:2015, ISO 27001:2013
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LocationPhilippines
Joined devRant on 12/19/2016
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Do you guys also cant' stand it when you are forced to let someone explain something in a very basic manner to you when you already understand that topic very deeply?4
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If Doctors Were Like Coders
(cross-posted from https://medium.com/@c09b6133a238/...)
Problem: The patient has a broken leg.
Solution:
1. Ask the patient to reproduce the exact scenario that resulted in the broken leg. Watch closely to see if the leg breaks again. Check for consistency by repeating the scenario a few more times.
2. Explain that this isn’t an intended use case for the leg, and besides, it only affects one person. Ask the patient if, all things considered, he really wants to prioritize his broken leg over your other work.
3. Point out that the patient’s other leg performs just fine under the same circumstances. Ask if he can use his other leg instead, at least as a workaround.
4. Attach several accelerometers to the broken leg and break it again. Stare at the data received from the accelerometers, then shrug and declare it useless.
5. Decide that the patient’s problem must be in his spleen. After all, that’s the only part of his body you don’t really understand.
6. Track down the people who created the patient. Ask them if he’s ever had spleen problems before. When they seem confused, explain that he has a broken leg. Ignore them when they tell you that the spleen they created could not possibly cause a broken leg.
7. Ask Google where a person’s spleen is. Spend half an hour reading the Wikipedia article on Splenomegaly.
8. Open the patient and grumble about how tightly-coupled his spleen and circulatory system are. Examine the spleen’s outer surface to see if there are any obvious problems. Inform him that several of his organs are very old and he should consider replacing them with something more modern.
9. Compare the spleen to some pictures of spleens online. If anything looks different, try to make it look the same.
10. Remove the spleen completely. See if the patient’s leg is still broken. If so, put the spleen back in.
11. Tell the patient that you’ve noticed his body is made almost entirely out of cellular tissue, whereas most bodies these days are made out of cardboard. Explain that cardboard is a lot easier for beginners to understand, it’s more forgiving of newbie mistakes, and it’s the tissue franca of the Internet. Ask if he’d like you to rebuild his body with cardboard. It will take you longer, but then his body would be future-proof and dead simple. He could probably even fix it himself the next time it breaks.
12. Spend some time exploring the lymph nodes in the patient’s abdominal cavity. Accidentally discover that if the patient’s leg is held immobile for six weeks, it gets better.
13. Charge the patient for six weeks of work.14 -
Got this from a recruiter:
We are looking for a **Senior Android Developer/Lead** at Philadelphia PA
Hiring Mode: Contract
Must have skills:
· 10-12 years mobile experience in developing Android applications
· Solid understanding of Android SDK on frameworks such as: UIKit, CoreData, CoreFoundation, Network Programming, etc.
· Good Knowledge on REST Ful API and JSON Parsing
· Good knowledge on multi-threaded environment and grand central dispatch
· Advanced object-oriented programming and knowledge of design patterns
· Ability to write clean, well-documented, object-oriented code
· Ability to work independently
· Experience with Agile Driven Development
· Up to date with the latest mobile technology and development trends
· Passion for software development- embracing every challenge with a drive to solve it
· Engaging communication skills
My response:
I am terribly sorry but I am completely not interested in working for anyone who might think that this is a job description for an Android engineer.
1. Android was released in September 2008 so finding anyone with 10 years experience now would have to be a Google engineer.
2. UIKit, CoreData, CoreFoundation are all iOS frameworks
3. Grand Central Dispatch is an iOS mechanism for multithreading and is not in Android
4. There are JSON parsing frameworks, no one does that by hand anymore
Please delete me from your emailing list.49 -
"Are you familiar with uploading your code to Google Drive?"
I left the building at that exact moment.41 -
We're excited to announce the first devRant-sponsored hackathon! It features everything we could have dreamed of in a hackathon: huge prizes ($10k to first place and others), an awesome beer-themed dev competition from lead sponsor Anheuser-Busch, lots of free beer, and an awesome setting at Alley in Chelsea NYC (devRant's hometown, we'll be there!)
It's taking place right here in NYC from March 25-26 and @trogus and I will be there and we really hope we can hang out with members of the devRant community who are participating. devRant is an official partner of the hackathon and we're very excited about the competition itself. There are two challenges teams can pick from: "Internet of Things" (Raspberry Pi’s, Arduinos, etc.) and "Data Insights" - both with the goal of finding creative solutions/innovations to help people drink more beer!
Tim and I look forward to hopefully seeing many of you there. Full details and registration here: https://hacktheworld.beer/NYCHackat...
Please let us know if you have any questions and let's hack some beer!
P.S. the hackathon is 21 years and older only because of the beer theme46 -
You go to an accountant to file your itemized taxes in a couple of hours, you pay them at least $200.
You go to a lawyer to incorporate your business in 2 days, and you pay at least $800.
You hire a photographer to take pictures of your 4-hours wedding and you pay them at least $1500.
You go to your car dealership to fix something and they charge you about $125 hourly labor rate.
Now, ENLIGHTEN ME, how did you come up with the idea that the web application I will create for your business in 8 weeks (design, code, test, deploy, server administration) should not cost more than $500????!!!!!18 -
So I'm in the market for a laptop and my friends don't understand why I'm being so picky. They don't understand why a laptop that weighs more than 2.0kg is heavy or why a 1366 x 768 isn't good if they have one with the same resolution and it's perfect. This mind might sound really "deep" but I feel like our laptop ends being the same as a canvas is for a painter. We spend 8 hours a day looking and working in these machines trying to create solutions for stuff that the "other people" - non-techies - take for granted. If they can be bloody picky about the pen the use to take notes in their classes and it's just a pen, why can't I be with the tool that's responsible for what I do on a daily basis and love doing?12
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*after 2 hours of programming*
Me to me: you can watch one episode of [some series]!
Me to me after that episode: just one more couldn't hurt for once!
...............
...............
...............
*five hours later*
Me: "what am I doing with my life 😭
This happens too fucking damn often 😫11 -
My girlfriend and I have been bored last weekend so we made some 8bit style Lego figures which are now decorating my home office :) (well in fact she made most of them)8
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My resolution for this year:
- learn PHP
- advance at JavaScript and figure out what's so cool about react.js
- be a pro with SQL and learn PostgreSQL
- build couple cool hardware projects with Raspberry Pi and Arduino based on C.5 -
Police officer McDucky reporting for duty. Hope we catch a lot of pesky bugs and complete projects.3
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I've literally ignored. My mates twice now , all I want is to chill and code.
I think other people don't get that. Honestly Xmas is far more draining then anything7 -
I graduated last weekend. Walked in the commencement ceremony, took pictures, posted a !rant here, the whole 9 yards. Then what happens? I get an email from the dean of the engineering college at my university stating that my degree check was done incorrectly and that I am 3 credit-hours short of graduating, it is too late to sign up for an intersession course, and there are now 3 credit-hour courses offered as 8-weel courses. So here I am, with two Job interviews coming up, without my degree, wondering why the hell I found all this out A WEEK AFTER I "Graduated"! DA FUCK!!!!!9
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I used to work with a guy who had 2 PH.Ds, in Computer Science and Electrical Engineering and over 600 patents but I kid you not the guy could not use the coffee machine. Now it's not like this coffee machine was as easy as a Keurig, it was some $20,000 espresso machine that took a while to figure out but I tried teaching him how to use it a few dozen times and still he couldn't get it right. It got to the point where I thought he was faking it so that others would make it for him so I offered him $500 if he could figure it out. Still nope. So for the remaining 2 years we worked together I made him coffee whenever he wanted, 2-4 times a day, and he bought me lunch everyday. Before I left the company I bought him a Keurig so that when I left he'd still have coffee.19
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So what if my screen is dirty? I'm not asking you a question, not to look at it, mind your own business!
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Be me at work, 12h nights shift, 4th day like that
Following online course on machine learning, instructor says we'll use python 3.x as the interpreter for the project, boot personal laptop and start pycharms, create the file, choose right interpreter no big deal
pip install the modules I need for the course - done, try to import them.
Doesn't work, first reboot, still not working, browsing Internet for answers, no ideas, reboot again (you never know) reload pycharms, browse Internet again, find out the modules only work on python 2.7.
Wasted 45minutes for this shit
Feels good bro.2 -
I just officially graduated from a web dev program and it feels...
Very underwhelming.
Learned ES6, React, Webpack, service workers, offline databases, accessibility, (...bla bla bla)
And my knowledge with data structures and algorithms isn't even that great yet.
I look at the stuff I still don't know and wonder if I'll ever be comfortable with my level of expertise.13 -
Head of IT department asked me to configure Apache from phpmyadmin. There occured 5 seconds of silence after he said that.6
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Why can't every browser just interpret shit the same way, how hard is it actually to standardize the rendering?3
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Developers that write commit messages that literally say "Changes", "Fixes", etc. Please act like a professional and write proper messages ffs5
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I have in my head parts of a game, I'd love to build. A top-down space colonization game. You control various spacecrafts and build spacestations etc. to expand your control.
The catch is that you have limited direct controls in-game. Most of the "gameplay" consists of having your own piece of software running somewhere, communicating with the API and controlling your colony.
Similar to Screeps, but I don't like the limitations of writing JavaScript and uploading it to the service. I'd love for the user to have free control of what language to use. They just need to be able to create a TCP socket and communicate with the API24