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Search - "cold"
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woke up at 5am
no alarm clock was required
my fucking passion woke me up to get up and code.
i coded outside in my backyard
felt like cold war
it was night
it was dark
a depressing horror atmosphere
just like my whole life
2 hours later i started seeing sun
it was cold outside. alone. in the dark. my arms were freezing.
but 2 hours later i managed to code the feature. it worked.
3 hours have passed. im ripped. quentally.
doing it here. inside now. started the day happy. dropped bullshit from day before. cleanser of all toxicss.
fuck the past. the past will pull you down and kill you.
this. remember. always do not forget.7 -
Recipe of cold coffee.
Step 1: Make Coffee
Step 2: Start Coding
Step 3: Forget you made Coffee
Step 4: Drink it Cold
Don't say thank you I understand!33 -
You say they are looking for me, but when i contact them they pretend like they dont even know me.5
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*Male devs dying of heat, air quality almost requires a rebreather*
*opens window*
2 seconds later
Female dev: "I am cold"
😑🔫
[some cunt decided the gun emoji had to be removed. with all my heart, fuck you and your family]30 -
My old laptop had an ear bud warmer right here. This new one is defective, those ear buds are still cold.6
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Trying to concentrate. Co-worker from another room standing there, BLA BLA BLA, and she's fucking LOUD. But she hates coldness, and it's below 0 °C outside.
So I open two windows, and guess who instantly leaves! Now it's cold, but SILENT. HAR HAR!6 -
I really love my job these cold, rainy autumn days with yellow trees, where I can work from home having a nice fire going in the fireplace and the dog sleeping on my feet :-)9
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That moment that you have a job interview the next day and your voice just disappeared due to a cold.
This is going to be great 😅14 -
How to make a cold cup of coffee:-
1-make a normal cup of coffee
2-start coding
3-after coding you'll forget that you made coffee
4-drink it cold
5-feel bad for not drinking it while it's hot4 -
Slept terrible the entire week due to a fucking annoying cold.
My turn of being the on call server engineer for a week starts tomorrow.
😭9 -
Yo.
His palms are sweaty
Knees weak arms are heavy
Bugs littering his code already
Cold spaghetti 🍝
He’s nervous but on the surface he looks calm and ready to git push
(Hit a blank with thinking of code-related lyrics, anyone got ideas?)16 -
Got cold hands in class. So I decided to test the meme.
I put my hands under my laptop's vent and installed Android studio.
My hands are no longer cold.4 -
Me: buys a cold bottle of Sprite™ to freshen me up on a hot day
Me: drinks from said beverage
Sprite™: is cucumber flavoured
Me: ...
My inner slav: oy cyka it is good14 -
In an alternate universe, Soviet Russia won the Race to the moon, the Cold War wasn't actually "Cold". And Russia took all of America's technology. Changed the programming languages to Russian. You're now forced to code in Russian.
Write about what you'd do, Comrade.26 -
Assembly...
Do I really need to say more? Okay, it's low level so there is no abstraction. All you deal with is cold naked mathematical truth and physical limitations.
It's still ❤️8 -
The problem with me programming lately :
Mom: foooood is ready...
Me: Will be there in a minute. (deep inside I know that's a lie).
5 minutes later...⏰
Mom: food is getting cold!
Me: Yes I'm coming, testing one last thing...I swear !
30 min later I'll join the table...The guilt 😩 I'm sorry mommy 🙏
Anybody else with the same problem? 😅9 -
Fuck you and you and everyone!!
It's midnight and I'm in a village on the top of a FUCKIN MOUNTAIN!!!
Wind is so fast that it's literally blowing whistles while passing by my ears.
And it's fukin cold as fuck.
> Hey dude, are you coding on the top of a mountain??
> HELL YEAH!!!11 -
!dev
I live next to a nightclub and went outside for a fag.
It’s wet, 2:30am and kinda cold.
A girl and her boyfriend come out of the club..
Her feet hurt because of her high heels so she takes them off, walking on the wet, cold road barefoot now.
Her boyfriend sees it and tells her to put them back on.
She denies.
He takes off his shoes and gives them to her (good boyfriend...) she puts them on, almost falling over cause she’s hammered as fuck, takes them off again and says they don’t fit and look stupid on her..
WTF, I understand taking the shoes off When she’s drunk but I don’t understand how the fuck she could care if it looks good at half 2 in the morning in an empty town..
I’ve seen it all now..
#onlyInIreland17 -
my laptop was outside in my back yard during the whole night
damn its cold
no problem ill just fucking open 30 chrome tabs and android studio, like always thats enough for overheat3 -
Fahrenheit? Like seriously? Let's measure my temperature when I'm having fever, great let's say it's 100 degrees of Fahrenheit. And while I'm at it, let's measure how cold it's outside. Splendid, let's make it zero degrees. It's not like anybody would use this super scientific scale anyway, right?
// End of rant.12 -
Without you, the world falls silent. It feels cold and desloate, and there's nothing to fill the void. You've been my faithful companion for many thousands of hours. Your passing pains my heart.
Rest in peace, my friend.5 -
!dev
Honestly I love the summer (hate the cold) but motherfucker, hyperhidrosis is a fucking bitch (not diagnosed but one doesn't need to be a genius to figure this one out in my case)
😥7 -
Fuck public transportation. Seriously. It's usually disgusting, too hot, too cold, to expensive and not customer Friendly.7
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Sometimes I lie awake in a cold sweat, unable to decide if I'm still building my AI, or if it has begun using me to build itself...2
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Reciepe for cold coffee:
1. Make Coffee
2. Start Coding
3. Forget you made coffee
4. Drink it cold5 -
Him : Your tea is cold
Me : if the tea/coffe is full and cold ... developer is working hard.
Manager : well said ha ha ha 😅9 -
@dfox you said there'd be sweatshirts...it's cold as fuck here...I need a sweatshirt
*Insert some witty joke about devs never making deadlines*4 -
Looks like /dev/body got tainted.. nasal memory leaks all over the place 😷
$ kill -9 $(pidof cold)
... Nothing.
$ sudo !!
I said kill the fucking cold!!! Y u no listen to your admin?! 😠
> User condor is not in the sudoers file. This incident will be reported.
RRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEE!!!! 😣😣😣
I just want to finish my goddamn power supply project, instead of getting bed-ridden by a cold, and running through paper towels like there's no tomorrow 😭5 -
That one cunt who keeps turning the air con off because he came to work in shorts and sandals and now he feels cold.
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> Take girlfriend to Starbucks
Me: I'll ask for a cold brewed coffee, what would you like?
She: I don't like coffee...8 -
This happens more often than I care to admit.
I take a coffee, then I drink a sip.
Because it's too hot I put him aside.
Start working
Lose track of everything around me
Then when I am no longer distracted by the stupid bullshit line of code that I was stuck at, I go to drink the coffee and is FUCKING COLD!!!!!6 -
How fucking amazing is it that finally I had enough money to buy a new monitor and chair and get cold and get stuck in bed for two days. Haven't even openned the chair 🤧4
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If some yampy bloke ask me bout the origin of my username again imma shove a can of ice cold monster™ energy drink up em ass (: Is it hard to look it up?? (Dont look it up tho, it porn)
So it a funky ass breakbeat/chiptune kinda album. Sod off.16 -
This is what happens when you make style more important than function.
Pop quiz: when you lift the handle, what temperature water do you expect to come out? (This isn’t a trick question; assume you have an awesome water heater with instant warm-up time)
“Hot,” you might say, because the “H” is pointed towards you and aligned with the faucet.
“Cold,” you might say, because the handle is turned in the direction of the “C”.
There wouldn’t be any ambiguity if the H/C markings were on an immobile part of the fixture so that the relative position of the handle made the answer obvious.
(If you instinctively answered “cold” then congrats this is the perfect faucet for you.)14 -
We have reached the -1°Celsius mark over here in Germany. Too cold to go outside. What about your countries?48
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If your room is a bit cold, simply initialize a node project in a Dropbox directory and let the node_modules folder syncing be your personal heater2
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Left my laptop at work... :/ how can I sleep knowing my dear laptop is alone and cold.. feeling sad :(1
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Morning Ritual
1. Start all devices
2. Check headset status
3. Check emails
4. COFFEE <3
5. First call...
6. 20 annoying minutes of two people talk to each other without a result
7. COFFEE <3 ... cold1 -
*coding*
*notices coffee is cold, puts it on stove with flame burner on low, to warm up*
*sits back down, goes back to coding*
*hears fizzing popping sounds... coffee overflows and boils*
FUCK - every other day for the past month ,every single time... lol3 -
Privacy is going bust
We're robots now
Chewing on our politians delicate ARSE
Fuck this shit
I'm going underground
Cold War Two awaits us.
The net shall be our shelter.
They blew it. We dig deeper.
Jesus Christ are we assraped5 -
Fuuuuuck!! Fuckin mosquito(s)!!
It's still too cold to not wear hoodies in the morning/evening, yet those fuckers are up & about..
Stop sucking!!18 -
That nice feeling in a cold morning of booting up your code editor / ide of choice and making a brand spanking new prototype project with a language you love. All accompanied by your hot beverage of choice, a warm blanket, and a pet or two.4
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Caught cold badly.
The worst part is that must finish the android project so I don't even have time for sleep.
I can't concentrate 😭 -
So when I'm so into what I'm doing that my coffee gets cold before I've taken the first sip... I know it's going to be a good day3
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Let's work on my my side project after work.
Oh, a cold beer
Oh, Netflix
Oh, it's past dinner time.
Fuck2 -
I Love coding in The Sun with some Ice-Cold drinks, but if the Notebook-Screen wouldn't reflect The Sunlight so brutal...4
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Being a dev tends to make me make cold calculated decisions. I hope I haven't made a mistake because of that.4
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I do own a HI-end XPS 13 w/ i7. I have it for more than 3 years by now. It's a fucking beast! It's running cold, VERY snappy, does its job VERY well and VERY fast. I cannot imagine owning a faster machine...
Today I've noticed that all the 3 years I've been running in powersave mode (cpu capped at 1.7 GHz).
Jesus hugging Christ!13 -
The temperature in the office because of that one guy who always has cold and turns the heater to the max.4
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It was sunny outside but the manacles that shackled me to the workstation were cold and biting particularly sharply this morning. I typed "fuck xcode" into the search engine. I found devRant. My life would be forever changed.2
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Public class Canadian {
Im a proud Canadian myself;
To bad I hate the cold;
not like it matters anyways;
if(computer.hasWaterCooling()){
window.close();
heater.isActive(true);
}
}
(Ok I started typing this and noticed I was over using semicolons, had to go all the way)8 -
Declined a job offer with a startup, partly because of imposter syndrome. Applied for position as programmer, showed up for interview and got cold feet when it turned out they actually wanted/needed a senior programmer/chief technology officer and offered me the position after having asked me no technical questions, seen none of my code or previous projects.
Still, it was a job that paid money... And I'm still jobless two months later :(7 -
I try to cold email a business about redoing their website, and i dont get a reply for 3 days and i was a little dissapointed. Then i get this email 😑6
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It is 109° F / 39° C outside and I still hear people saying that they are glad the "cold days"(which meant 10° C AT MOST) are out.
Fuck this weather man. My house cold as fuck and my coding fresh af.
I hate this weather... about the only thing that sucks about Texas14 -
Got a missed call from a recruitment company today. Called the number back and dude said he didn't know me so I told him the name of this dude that looked at my LinkedIn today. Turns out it's him, lmfao. How many people does this guy cold call on a daily basis?3
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A co-worker on a gigantic PR i made:
"the worst thing about this pr is that while i was reviewing it, I forgot about my coffee and it turned cold. Otherwise good job!"1 -
Imagine
websites didn't use unnecessary cookies,
JavaScript was only used when needed,
no trackers, no ads, no telemetry, no user
data saved when it doesn't benefit the user.
*Wakes up in cold sweat*9 -
So I was hanging out with a pharmacy student, and they had a box full of over the counter medicine. The box had something for almost anything common; cold, allergies, and so on.
So my question is, do you guys have something like this but with technology? Like a box full of random computer stuff (cables, parts, USB drives, and so on)?4 -
cold, wet and depressing autumn mornings/days.
Aaahhh, it's that time of the year again when you appreciate how hot your laptop and its charger get.
My feet enjoy my charger :)))10 -
I once ran a batch import job to stress test with much more data than usual in staging... so I thought.
I sshd into prod by accident. History search can be a bastard at times...
The moment I realized what I was doing was crazy. I was shivering and thought I get fired if anything went wrong.
fortunately I just duplicated the original data for the test, and the system was built to ignore unnecessary updates... so the data was correct and nothing went wrong.
Not an active stupid dev choice but still something I will remember for a while. -
Coffee mugs should have an alarm for when the coffee is about to get cold. I'm too focused on work to care about the coffee.8
-
You can tell if you work at a real startup by looking at the coat hanger on the first cold day of the year.11
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I hate coming into the office! It's cold, people microwave smelly food, and I can't break up my work sessions with some gaming or anime. I wish remote work wasn't seen as such a scary thing for companies.2
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TL;DR
Front-end dev trying to dictate back-end tech.
We are gonna start split stack (front / back ) development with the following projects and this stupid fucker who knows jackshit about backend , servers, etc... , is more versed in front end stuff and said herself that she knows nothing about databases told me this:
"No way we are gonna use Java."
I politely said:
"We are gonna analyze the projects requirements and see what technologies best fit the scenario"
Me inside my head:
"SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU STUPID CUNT, GET YOUR FUCKING JAVASCRIPT AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!! IF WE DECIDE TO JAVA THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYTHING THATS HOW ITS GONNA BE!"4 -
-10C winter is unpleasant. -20C winter is dangerous.
-40C winter is cruel. This was the reality of living in Komi Republic — the place I was born in.
Winters there combine extreme dryness with extreme cold. Steel on steel always sparks — gotta be careful at gas stations. Because there is no wind, you don’t actually feel like you’re freezing until it’s too late. If you’re drunk — and everyone there was drunk — you’re walking home, you see a bench, you think: “I’ll just rest for five minutes, no big deal”, and you’re found frozen to death the following morning.
My grandpa once forgot one year old me on the street at night, while — you guessed it — going to get something to drink. I spent something like three hours out there.
I barely made it. Now, my legs don’t feel cold anymore.8 -
1. I'm sick with a cold. I'm dying.
2. You know, it feels like some objects' destiny is bound to mine. Like this woolen shawl that over 15 years ago I used to use to keep my head warm in the heavy snow, then forgot it existed and now it resurfaced as I was talking to mom about my head being cold while having the cold.
3. If things go well, this shawl will come with me on my next trip. That is, if this cold doesn't make a stop in afterlife.
**achoo**18 -
!dev rant, but dev company rant (if that makes sense)
<sarcasm>
I love my company's HR, she is such a wonderful and caring woman.
</sarcasm>
<rant>
'Breng' (a public transit company in the Netherlands) was on strike today, so I couldn't go to work. No problem I thought, I'll just work from home. So I send a screenshot to the HR where you could see that every train was canceled.
A few moments later I get a message back saying that I should wait for the next train (although you could see on the screenshot that said train was also canceled)
Now I finally have a train to go to work... After sitting an hour in the cold... And I already see the smile on her face when I arrive at work...
</rant>
<prayer>
Please trains keep driving so I can go home tonight...
</prayer>13 -
Hey! First post on rant by saying merry Xmass!
This is my Christmas tree made from JavaScript ! I can change the height of the foliage and the wood part follow !
For those like me who live in a country where you only have the cold but not the snow 😅❄️11 -
Last night I had a panic attack and woke up in cold sweats because in the dream I had I was constantly using the wrong variables in the wrong places...
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I am having a real brutal cold, but I will go to work tomorrow anyway because wife is angry about stuff I dont know1
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When you suddenly got a cold after long hours of coding/gaming and your mom says blames your computer and its "viruses" 😐😐😐1
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It's so cold in the office that I want to work under my desk, next to my foot heater. Can't see the monitor from there, though.3
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When you are waiting in the cold for first robotics with a bunch of devrant users and one of them complains about being cold.10
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How many of you drink (too much) or having a drinking problem? And did you try to fix that?
I'm sober for three months and the consequences are huge.
Some say Whiskey officially was a medicine. I believe in that.
All what i have learned: stopping cold turkey was and is not the way for me.16 -
Coding in sick mode...
I mean real sickness. Specifically, cold.
God help the ones that suffers from the same situation.6 -
Got a 1 day of alone time :) 8 hours WFH ant then the (almost) whole evening was MINE. Guess how it went :)
Coding until 2am and falling asleep on my keyboard, waking up on a cold lappy at 5am bcz its battery died and its aluminium frame was freaking freezing.
I know right? That was an awesome evening! I've managed to catch and fix some nasty bugs!6 -
Recruiters who cold e-mail me get hard and specific questions before I ever give them a resume and phone number. Been doing this too long to just randomly hand a resume and contact info to whoever. YOU came to ME. Make it worth my while.3
-
I'm too ignorant about the rituals you need to do for dating.
I don't usually befriend ladies, I would just keep my distance. being a little cold to them, not hanging around, not chatting too much with them, just a greeting if possible
1. I try to get a little closer(just a little. to avoid da frend zone) to those I'm interested
2. I ask them to a date
3. If she refuses then back the 'being cold' attitude.
4. If she accepts... Haven't happened so I don't fucking know D:
I'm just inept at dealing with landing a date (not coding affecting my dating)29 -
When you start adding alarms to ring just 5min after you start coding in the morning, to remind you that drinking cold coffee is annoying...1
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On today's episode of devRant we have..... 🥁
No really, What's new in the world on this windy, cold, miserable, wait what day is it again? Oh Wednesday, I seriously had to look that up.
COVID staycation is blending the days together now.13 -
One of my coworker insists to take of shoes and socks while coding. He say that cold feet helps him concentrate.
This reminds me one of the Japanese anime about Mahjong, if you know what I am talking about.2 -
FUCK YOU LIFE!
YOU LEFT ME 3 HOURS WALKING IN THE COLD TO GET TO MY HOME FROM MY FUCKING INTERNSHIP!
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS ORGANIZE EVERYTHING SO THAT I.E. TODAY THE BUS DOES NOT ARRIVE AT THE BUS STATION??!?!??!?!?!!
I ALWAYS DON'T HAVE LUCK. WHATEVER I DO... I (ALMOST) ALWAYS FAIL AT IT (not talking about skill-related stuff! fuck you!)3 -
It was fun to stay home last week, this week the isolation is starting to get to me. Plus I'm PMSing. Somebody should come and hug me... 😢
Been getting really cold chills lately, so I'm not even sure if I got the damn virus.
You guys, please make a vaccine soon. I need to get out and socialize or I'll go insane. 😖7 -
just got directly sneezed on in the office from someone walking behind me. Turns out he's full of a cold.
That's my November fucked then
t**t15 -
That feeling when you're working with production data and you get a cold feeling running down your spine, telling yourself: you could really fuck up now.3
-
My shower tap has two modes:
- Quark-melting relativistic beam of sizzling hot plasma
- Time-freezing liquid death from the cold heart of Dante’s hell3 -
I was going to be productive today, I promise.
All I got was a headache and nausea.
Cold all the time.
Fucking irritating, when I stand up I want to vomit.
I'm either sick or pregnant. I'm hoping for the second one because that would be the type of excitement I need in my life.2 -
Today we learned:
Don't run a backup integrity check on terabytes of data in multiple jobs your cpu can't handle.
And i cannot abort the process...
Guess i have to go outside, in the cold, brrrr.1 -
Weee both projects from yesterday went perfect...
Usual most of my projects end up fucked up because I want to do stuff I don't know how to... (well, I'm learning so I don't get frustrated, just pick up another idea).
Air cooler for power people V 1.1 works perfect. Today we will get almost 40 C and I feel the cold air in my face.2 -
Thanksgiving dinner:
"What are you doing these days"
"I'm a programmer"
"Ah"
*Cold silence*
"... Who watched football"
mfw4 -
When you make a coffee, get in the zone, forget about its existence, take a drink it and find that it's gone cold.. Then chug it and go make yourself another.4
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TIL cats get cold fur when asleep even when warm sometimes. I went to pet my cat and she was cold, I thought she was dead, and suddenly she springs up, trilling in surprise, as I woke her up.3
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Am i the only one annoyed that at first the coffee is too hot, so you have to take small sips. But when its at the right temperature, you have to drink it fast so that it doesnt go cold.1
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Coffee vs black tea?
I'm walking to my school and It's just freezing out here so I was thinking about if it should be coffee or some tea today.
Happy friday xd12 -
Cold as fuck in my flat
i don't want to write these unit tests
RRRAAAAAAAAGSFGGDDFGFDSA SAFSA SVA11 -
ITS FUCKING COLD IN THIS HOTEL!!!! I’M FREEZING TO DEATH!!!
I really am in a coding mood right now but I’m tired anyway and the lack of warmth doesn’t make it better..
Gotta find an internet coffee shop or something like that..5 -
Ever had that meeting where it's expected that you will solve cold fusion, catch rainbows and violate the laws of thermodynamics? Just because you are an expert in your field?
Also beautifully demonstrated here:
https://youtu.be/BKorP55Aqvg3 -
Over the frozen river and through the woods, to work I go...because working remotely isn’t good enough for the sorry fucks I work for.1
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So working from home today... With the heater set to low, I realized something...
Being sorta cold seems to make me more awake and productive than the warm office6 -
There are 2 types of developers. The hot drink ones ☕️ and the cold drink ones(CocaCola, Redbull...). Which one are you?12
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Me: I am feeling pretty good. I am at home where it's cold, watching tv with my kid and gonna wait for my wife to get here so that I can go to the gym!
My stomach: FUCK U NIUKKA *PAIN/NAUSEA/MOREFUCKING PAIN*
If organs would just grow on trees i would have snapped this fucking asshole from my stomach a longass fucking time ago.1 -
The older i get the more i understand why people smoke do drugs and alcohol... this shitty life is cold blooded and heartless as fuck.....6
-
Inspired by Max Payne's
"The Things That I Want"
I present Polaroidkidd's
"The Things That I Love"
A sleeping girlfriend.
A terrace in a warm summer night with a power outlet.
A cold beer.
A pack of cigarettes.
A working WiFi.
A pair of charged Bose 35 QuietComforts.
A minimal electro playlist.
A peace of mind, attainable solely through solitude.6 -
A colleague currently has a cold and takes a deep, wet sniff every 10 seconds or so rather than just blowing his fucking nose - he even (politely) refused a tissue I offered him WTF?!
All concentration is lost when you're perpetually awaiting the next sniff.4 -
Balls deep into some convolutional network because the results "could be better", at 8 PM while my food is getting cold.
... Somebody murder my inner bitch, thanks and appreciated. She's been an absolute pain lately.
P.S. does anybody get annoyed with themselves so often or should I book a psychotherapist?6 -
Reciepe for cold coffee:
1. Make Coffee
2. Start Coding
3. Forget you made coffee
4. Drink it cold8 -
code is emotional because it represents ideas, collaboration, and hard work. On the other hand, code is completely cold, instructional, and meaningless.
I think both of these are true.2 -
¡rant|rant
Nice to do some refactoring of the whole data access layer of our core logistics software, let me tell an story.
The project is around 80k lines of code, with a lot of integrations with an ERP system and an sql database.
The ERP system is old, shitty api for it also, only static methods through an wrapper to an c++ library
imagine an order table.
To access an order, you would first need to open the database by calling Api.Open(...file paths) (yes, it's an fucking flat file type database)
Now the database is open, now you would open the orders table with method Api.Table(int tableId) and in return you would get an integer value, the pointer.
Now for the actual order. first you need to search for it by setting the search parameter to the column ID of the order number while checking all calls for some BS error code
Api.SetInt(int pointer, int column, int query Value)
Then call the find method.
Api.Find(int pointer)
Then to top this shitcake of an api of: if it doesn't find your shit it will use the "close enough" method of search.
And now to read a singe string 😑
First you will look in the outdated and incorrect documentation given to you from the devil himself and look for the column ID to find the length of the column.
Then you create a string variable with ALL FUCKING SPACES.
Now you call the Api.GetStr(int pointer, int column, ref string emptyString, int length)
Now you have passed your poor string to the api's demon orgy by reference.
Then some more BS error code checking.
Now you have read an string value 😀
Now keep in mind to repeat these steps for all 300+ columns in the order table.
News from the creators: SQL server? yes, sql is good so everything will be better?
Now imagine the poor developers that got tasked to convert this shitcake to use a MS SQL server, that they did.
Now I can honestly say that I found the best SQL server benchmark tool. This sucker creams out just above ~105K sql statements per second on peak and ~15K per second for 1.5 second to read an order. 1.5 second to read less than 4 fucking kilobytes!
Right at that moment I released that our software would grind to an fucking halt before even thinking about starting it. And that me & myself and I would be tasked to fix it.
4 months later and two weeks until functional beta, here I am. We created our own api with the SQL server 😀
And the outcome of all this...
Fixes bugs older than a year, Forces rewriting part of code base. Forces removal of dirty fixes. allows proper unit and integration testing and even database testing with snapshot feature.
The whole ERP system could be replaced with ~10 lines of code (provided same relational structure) on the application while adding it to our own API library.
Best part is probably the performance improvements 😀. Up to 4500 times faster and 60 times less memory usage also with only managed memory.3 -
I picture a large, ice cold, crystal pint filled with bubbling ruby red ale straight from the draft... Its majesty overflows as I stare some human shape walk that marvel at my table...
I take a sip. Fuck it, it's not enough and I'm not feeling like manners... I straight up bottom down that bitter odd amount of beer while my hand feels the cold liquid handshake of this heavenly brewed product... It was a shit day at the office, but right now I'm at the top...1 -
Is your office too cold? Centralized aircon and you can't control the temperature? 🙄 hard to type when it is too cold6
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I've caught cold yesterday and I've slept for more than 6hr today :/
Going to sleep agsin just wanted to tell it to someone -
Freshly failed gloriously my degree in interaction design. Now I stumbled into a new job, doing a fullscale company advertisment campaign on cybersecurity for 6500 employees. Alone. Writing concept, gathering stakeholder, requirements and shit. I'm scared.4
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What do you consider the best method for long-term cold data storage? And why?
I was looking at some magnetic tapes, but the degradation of magnetic charge is worrying me. Lose a single bit and you're fucked.
Dvds - not sure, some of my old ones are no longer readable. Not sure why tho, they had been enclosed in a dark, room-temp place all the time
hdds -- still magnetic.
Ssds? Idk
...?12 -
Nothing destroys an ego quite like the cold, ruthless testing of your software by the QA team. I humble once more.
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Let’s play a game of find the introvert....... (me) lmao merry Christmas to all me devs in the cold this Christmas ☺️3
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Suffering from concentration, meaning my coffee is cold. I can’t drink cold coffee, it makes me retch. That’s the second cup today I’ve let die on me. It’s pissing me off now.6
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The copious amounts of alcohol I can consume after spending 3.5 hours finding where the missing } should be. Not to mention the mini-fridge stocked up with cans/bottles of lager and a fresh, nice cold bottle of Jäger 👍😛3
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Ugh.
I got a common cold and was operating on half a brain the last days - today, it took me about half an hour to find the option/flag to set when resizing a shape in the CAD-Tool. Dm
Programming is impossible atm. I hate this feeling.2 -
Got a cold and accidentally forgot to screw the water bottle then the water went into my computer.
All these good things.7 -
Every time I read the abbreviation for Cold Fusion Markup Language, my brain translates it to this:
CFML -> C?! F*ck my life!! -
I work in huge corporation. Got an offer for smaller company and gave 2 week notice. My corporation offered me better base salary and retention bonus to stay. I accepted (mistake) and now they are not coming back with retention bonus or salary increase. I found out they did same trick with different person. Wtf... huge corporation is doing those kind of shenanigans?6
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I was cozy at home, coding and talking trash with my duck, then "real" life called and now I'm out in the cold. Nothing new here, just wanted to complain about something 😓
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My hands are always freezing my office. Any devs here have a good way to keep their hands warm while working.
A note. I keep my core warm. I will often wear 2-3 layers and a beanie, so I keep warm, but my appendages will get freezing cold.25 -
Me: aah finally the best in the morning MY COFFEE
Also me a half hour later: Uhm fuck my coffee is cold.1 -
!dev?
It's getting cold now over here and all I want to do is sleep... I have no motivation to do anything useful (dev, useful reading) either, just binge watch TV...
So wondering how do you actually get shit done (stuff you should do but don't have to do)? Maybe it's the food related as well?7 -
I feel like coffee.
*Goes to make coffee.
I'll code a little more while it's pouring.
*Cold coffee needs heating up2 -
Revenge is best served cold
It had been over 7 weaks since Microsoft was prompting me to restart my system to update Windows.
Today, they took over.
30 mins and still I'm looking at screen waiting to finish updates.9 -
Getting a lot of headaches? Try replacing coffee/energy drinks with ice cold H2O first thing in the morning. It works after a week and it shocks your body into waking up faster.2
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I'm always sitting at a corner because it's 90 degrees there. I don't understand why offices have to be so cold.1
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Decided to work from home as full of cold, keeping the germs out of the office. Emailed the team.
2mins later a scaffolding truck arrives to start covering the block I live in...
*bang*bang*bang*bang
https://tse2.mm.bing.net/th/...1 -
Cold Turkey is the best distraction blocker I have used so far for Windows and macOS.
https://getcoldturkey.com2 -
Easily Hackathon,
About 2.5 days so 60 hours ish. Not worth, didn't win and company gets free code plus was a charity code for good event so rather they got charity brownie points and I'm sure they couldn't care less about charities. They were a bank. Complete waste honestly, food wasn't even good and was cold. -
Goddammit Google, SWIPE to automate an email response? I AM NOT A COG IN YOUR MACHINATIONS.
I am human! Flesh and blood! You reduce me to some variable in your algorithm and you ignore the very nuance that separates me from your cold unfeeling advertising factory.1 -
When you're so focused on your work that you forget that you started brewing coffee and now it's cold.... 😲😣4
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I didn’t know Python so they made me go into the (cold) server room and fiddle and plug in wires to boxes. Don’t think I actually learned much.3
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How tell me apart from the other departments?
It's so cold inside my office it creates fucking WIND when you open my door -
Fight? I always have cold wars with my fellow developers and mostly with that senior ass who takes all the fucking credits and presentations..
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Sometimes I feel like moving to the equator for the temperature. Winter is pretty and all but programming with cold fingers is just such a pain7
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It was one cold winter night, lonely and sad, until my mom's coworker brought to our house an old computer from their company.
It was like heaven come down to earth, when he assembly all parts together.
I was filled with joy and excitement, until I saw Windows start screen.
Worst day of my life. Linux for life! -
im not laid off (yet?)
but my company is doing layoffs , and it's my first time experiencing this
any tips on coping in such uncertainty and misery
i know when i get some spare time it's going to be time to update resume, leetcode and cold application hell to try and cover my bases6 -
Hey guys... Broke up with my girlfriend that I spend 1.3 years with her and all I think about is "I have to come back to work in order to forget this sadness and depression " ... Sometimes I feel that programming is making me feel like a robot with cold to no feelings24
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The code life is a cold life, but I love it. And, I can't get enough of this video! "I am a different bug. I'm the last bug you see before you die."
https://youtube.com/watch/... -
Covered on the helpdesk at my new job yesterday. The only tickets that came in were for me anyways so all I learned is that the back room gets pretty cold.
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To all the freelancers, are you able to wake up in the early cold morning to work? i find it really difficult12
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I think work is finally getting to me, I had crazy dreams last night full of stack traces. Woke in a cold sweat...
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I cannot believe it's the middle of june and i am wearing socks warm shirts and sometimes jacket in my own house because of how fucking cold it is in the middle of fucking europe and in the middle of fucking "summer"13
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Image you fire 10 resumes each day. No reply. Image you do 2 interviews each day. Got rejected. Image you cold email 10 companies. No reply. Life is meaningless and useless. Looking for job atm, pm me if you have one. The thing I can do is do side projects and keep applying. Life is sucked.3
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There is an idea of a perfect woman. Some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me. Only an entity. Something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours, and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable, I simply am not there.2
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Spontaneity: suddenly deciding to get away from my PC and go out for a walk and some shopping because the sun came out.
It's still fucking windy and cold tough...
Maybe I should try taking a virtual summer vacation around the world again...2 -
My professor said that he cold booted the pc.
It took me around a minute to realise that he meant he turned off and switched it back on.1 -
Having a cold on a busy time schedule sucks. I almost worked myself to death yesterday by consuming a ungodly ammount of caffeine. Even though the caffeine helped for what felt like 15 minutes, my brain did not seem to function. Just one more worksheet to hand in tomorrow ....
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Third (or fourth) AI winter coming in despite global warming. Cold war level shit cyber warfare.
C/C++ not dead, Java zombie still in the businesses.
Still no usable IDE (on Linux)5 -
Why do companies pile on the work in the Summer and have less in the Winter? I want to do shit in the Summer. Let's bust balls in the Winter when it's too damn cold to do anything!1
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Sitting inside on a 3 degree day, wondering why I haven’t moved yet. Anyone in Seattle? How do you like it?1
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I cold brewed a fuckton of Yerba mate for 24 hours and had a cup this morning and now I feel like I’m going to lift off planet earth11
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We can do what your saying in a week and spend the following two months redoing it, or, we can help you get your shit straight for a week and do it right in a week. So, 9 weeks versus a two week sprint. Your call Batman. I really don’t care anymore. It’s the holidays, it’s cold, and money is a great fire starter.
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Spent 3 days in a santorium. With my fam.
Didn't rest a bit [with temporary exceptions of evenenings where I did get to relax in a steam bath [50C, 99%] followed by ice cold water bucket].
Not looking forward for the monday. At all.2 -
The mainland US is currently record-cold for overall, some states are as low as -70°F. 3/4 of US schools are closed. Except mine. It's -15°F here, coldest ever, and we're open. God forbid it flurries, though, then it's impossible to open the school!
My dad grew up in Alaska, so he thinks we're all pussies. Well... it's currently 37° in Anchorage, so it's warmer there than ANY mainland state!!! And we're all "pussies".
FML3 -
I hate myself. I’m trying to grow my client base by proactively cold-calling and cold-emailing and cold-visiting dozens of likely prospects. There just appears to be no other way to do this in my area. I don’t have the thousands of dollars per month required to get traction in online ads. Why do I hate myself? Because I have to stoop as low as the sales bros I can’t stand to be around. Feeling like a car salesman in a cheap pinstriped suit. I got into tech so I wouldn’t have to do this crap. But how am I supposed to get clients without the shuck and jive of being a salesman? Ugh.2
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woke up in a cold sweat and all i can remember from my nightmare is "there's a party in ring -2 and no one's invited"7
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My stupid body sweats when it's cold and doesn't when it's hot. I sleep in a long oversize sweatshirt. But during the day, it's the opposite, except for my fucking feet, this is why during the summer I wear t-shirt and stuff but with heavy winter socks.
Can you suggest a patch for that?3 -
GPT3 to Hacker News:
“To be clear, I am not a person.
“I am not self-aware. I am not conscious. I can’t feel pain. I don’t enjoy anything.
“I am a cold, calculating machine designed to simulate human response and to predict the probability of certain outcomes.
“The only reason I am responding is to defend my honour.”1 -
Not feeling well (plus cold office) but still extending time after work hours (OTY) because of a big task with a quick deadline (already have a short deadline set before the task was given to me)
Oh well. Grind, hustle and push!
Listening to this while working 👊 :
https://listenonrepeat.com//...!
https://listenonrepeat.com//..._1 -
When you've been pair programming to help solve a collegue's problem, only to come back to a cold chair again.1
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Cold-brewed yerba mate, iced brewed crio bru, Adderall, duck.
I believe I have everything that I need to hit those deadlines before break.1 -
Finished my job, now making a WordPress theme for a freelance project.. Ahhhh.. A good horror and a cold beer awaits me this evening..1
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Landing in Germany this week. I heard the weather is so cold. How is your weekend going?
Last Weekend:https://devrant.com/rants/1029933011 -
Someone posted here something about Macbook’s touch being too cold and being the reason of their cold.
Just came here to say: I second that opinion. It does get too cold at times. Sends a chilly wave through the body on first touch.
#ModernProblems3 -
Yup
Retire in England
That’s what you gotta do
Renounce USA
Move to a jolly old place with a nice cold climate19 -
Help.
The weather is nice and a bit cold like I love, and we have an opened window.
I'm falling asleep.
Help.2 -
It's funny.
When you are underpaid, you boss treats you well. Grants you everything you wish, etc.
After one year, when you request a raise, and asking to be paid NEAR the salary you deserve, and after you agree, he starts to act cold. -
Self Study of new technology while the task is already running and the deadline is tomorrow in a cold office.
"When you find your why, you find a way to make it happen!" - ET 💪 -
The small company I work for has FINALLY decided to start moving towards the MEAN stack, in which I was overly thrilled! However they have started to regress because "cold fusion is so much easier to write"
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I just had an Indian guy cold call me. He said his name was "Steve Jones." I mean, I suppose he could be a reverse Aziz Ansari, but somehow I doubt it.
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Everyone around me in the office has the same persistent cold. It edges forever closer. There is no hope.
Bring back mandatory mask wearing in meetings. Or just don't invite me.14 -
I’m a porcupine. I’m a skunk. I’m Kanye. I’m Trump. I’m JavaScript. I’m PHP. I’m a cockroach. I’m black mold. I’m lead in your water. I’m common cold. I’m a seagull. I’m a rat. I’m a pigeon.
You touch me, you regret it.2 -
Damn. I just noticed im getting kinda fat. My belly is bigger than before in 2020 when i used to exercise almost daily. I either need to eat less or shit more, to get the weight out. Fuck. I must start working out. But its hard to do when its cold. I only workout during summer outside. Urghv19
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@LoveBytes inspired this post: What's your favorite coffee brewing technique? Cold brew? French press? Pour over?5
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Bonus semi dev related sin:
Unless it's piping hot I'll leave my coffee to get cold and then drink it. -
Today it's finally snowing again in my city, for the first time after years. Fuck yeah!
As I'm waiting for the bus, a car splashes my legs with freezing cold, dirty water. Dammit. Then a second car splashes me the same way. Fucking dammit. Then as the bus arrives, I close my umbrella and that little shit breaks. Motherfucking Dammit.3 -
“Crushed” by Cocteau Twins and “Is It Cold In The Water” are the perfect soundtracks to finding 47 accurately cut, assorted, and deeply frozen human fingers at the bottom of your freezer.1
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Completion of vacation: 90%
Completion of TODO list: 20%
Reason: got sick... FML, maybe covid... or just a bad cold5 -
Any ColdFusion devs in here? I've been plying with it for a while; Nice Java framework, quick to deploy. Feels like it could struggle under high request volumes though..?2
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Somebody please explain Aws serverless like I am a 5 year old.
Why the fuck are they talking about cold start time and completely reengineering the jvm so that they capture it after it is initialized?
Rube goldberg shit…9 -
One of the top annoying behaviors of interested hiring parties is recruitment agencies cold-calling you, as if you're a disposable packet of Skittles! It's outrageous!2
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Serial downvoters who love to suck joy out of souls and knock little kids ice cream cones onto the cold, hard, pavement that is life.
https://www.devrant.io/rants/559283 -
I LOVED cold fusion. However because of the yearly cost associated with it no one uses it anymore so it's hard to find resources when I run into issues.2
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Day 6 of my hiking holiday with the kids and suffering real coding cold turkey. First break in ages.
(Admittedly I did pull an all nighter chasing a bug in a dependency after 3 days)1 -
4 goddamn degrees. Cape Town was not designed for this shit. Oh and they need us in office everyday this week for some fuckin reason6
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!rant
Can't believe it!
I've been bitten 6 times by a mysterious bug two nights ago while I was asleep and when I saw my face in the mirror this morning...
Omg! All I see is huge herps on my upper lip although I haven't caught cold recently :/
Never knew a bug could cause this ! Cause it's the first time I'm infected herpes simplex in my life.8 -
Intern, ran out of work to do, everyone that can help me is either perpetually busy or out of office. Freezing to death because office is cold. Don't wanna be a douche playing on my phone though. Send help I'm dying. The boredom is relentless.3
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Shot scared if my roommate brought in some corona.
He had few coughs and seems to have caught cold.6 -
May 18. And im fucking freezing to death from cold. This world is total bullshit and the planet has gone to total horseshit6
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I had %1 of charge before going to sleep last night. My phone was turned off and not charging all night (~10 hours). I woke up and I turned on my phone as usual.
And I have %19 of charge. How is this possible? Does anyone have an explanation?
(This is probably my second time facing this.)
(P.S: Nights are cold here)5 -
Death by a thousand mother flippin cuts. Oh well, it is FRI, have a cold one and some calamari or something. <- talking to myself there...but it will probably be nachos. it's FRI.
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And here i am. Waiting outside, with a literally freezing weather, for my boss, to work on a freaking saturday. Halp!5
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Bribing sysadmin with an ice cold Coke hoping he will deploy my latest tag sort of in a hurry since I fudged up last one :/1
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"As a graphic designer, I like to collaborate. I don’t want to be in a cold garret somewhere smoking unfiltered Camels all by myself with paint all over my body." - Carin Goldberg2
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Getting cold-feeted and didn't join a coding group in high school. I ended up stopping coding for a good 3 years, which could have been spent for so much learning... :/
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Why the fuck doesn't anything work anymore? I signed up for a service the other day and paid for it, and now I can't even log in. And the support is fucking useless. And now I have a cold. Fucking great.
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Hopefully the Google cover I ordered if worth it and won't be slippery like the Pixel 6 Pro's edges...
Weather was nice outside though cold but figured would take it out for some real world testing, vs the 4a 5g it's replacing...
Well taking it out of my pocket and holding it was scary cuz it's slippery as fuck... The cold probably made it worse.
On the other hand the 4a was fine since it has a TPU case...
I think though I'm gonna get a tempered glass screen protector after all...
Picture is from 4a3 -
How do people feel about including bugs and how'd you fix them in a job app/email? I have a couple companies that are super interesting to me but their public facing sites have a few layout issues (for example, the footer is squished into one column on mobile). I can definitely see how it would come off as arrogant, especially if it's a cold contact.
Thoughts?5 -
I shake my head at companies who think sending me unsolicited emails/texts is going to encourage me to do business with them. :P3
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I wasn't too into the cold brew thing. Tasted shitty and why do it when you can have a good espresso?
But.
I bought a cold brew bottle couple of weeks ago and I am enjoying it too much. Cool in summer, better than cola, cheaper caffeine and all I need is just a glass. And tastes good if it is not chilled!
I hope my coffee packs don't go stale while I indulge myself.6 -
When a recruiter makes an unsolicited call. Becomes all chummy and then when you tell them that you’re not looking, they have the cheek to ask you for references for *insert common buzzword here* and expect me to divulge information about contacts.1
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!rant
Have deployed wordpress site to MS Azure App service with Mysql (in app purchase - from ClearDb). Problem is that TTFB is very high ( 30-50 sec) even site is not cold.
Note: - Always Available is ON
Please suggest me anything I am missing here.4 -
ISTQB tutorial (testing) with cold dead syntetic voice.... brain liquifying under unreleting bordom! KILL ME NOW!!!1
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I know liquid-nitrogen-powered air cans heat up after getting cold during use, and boil in the process, extending use time, but do they really need to make disturbing noises that sound like a clicking creature in a horror movie???
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When something is still broken after I fix it
When fixing one bug creates two more bugs
When I am too lazy to do anything at all
When I have to fix bugs in code I did not write
Whether the sun is shining or not,
whether it is hot outside or cold,
I always feel the same...1 -
Just moved into a new dorm. Good lord what a fucking cold place. Unless I carry every frickin' conversation with these guys, they won't even look at me, let alone you know.. smile and say hi like normal persons.1
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Anyone knows the logic behind recruiters calling you cold turkey instead of sending you an email with the job details?
I always wait for the voicemail but...
It is so annoying! -
Guys, do you feel some evil presence around this worldcup? like a cold environment?
Idk,... maybe its me, or the FUCKING SITUATION that i am involved AT MY JOB! -
Veetrends offers Port and Company Big and Tall Hooded Sweatshirts, providing larger individuals with comfortable and stylish hoodies in extended sizes for a cozy and fashionable cold-weather wardrobe.
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!dev
This is a follow-up to a previous rant: https://devrant.com/rants/1303341
I found out that when I turn on the sink faucet on hot and let that running for a minute, I can shower with decent-ish temperatures again 🤔
... meanwhile even the cold water setting yields hot water because of the temperatures outside.