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FUCKING HELL! I JUST WANNA STAY HOME AND CODE! NO I DONT WANNA WATCH THAT SHITTY MOVIE AGAIN! NO I DONT WANNA GO DRINKING WITH YOU AND LISTEN TO YOUR LUDICROUS BRAGGING! NO I FUCKING DONT WANT TO MEET YOUR COOL FRIENDS WITH FACEBOOK PHOTOGRAPHY PAGES! NO I DONT WANT TO GET A NEW LIFE, CODE IS MY ART AND ALL I WANT IS TO STAY AND PRACTICE IT TILL MY EYES GO DRY AND WHEN THAT HAPPENS I'LL CODE IN FUCKING BRAILLE!21
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Another attempt at trying to get support for weakening encryption recently.
An FBI spokesperson said something like 'we can put people on the moon, why can't we just create law enforcement-accessible encryption? i just don't buy it."
Fuck off and die.29 -
If you're going to ask for my help
... and then do the opposite of everything i say
... and then complain when things don't work
... and continue to ignore everything i say
HOW ABOUT YOU JUST FUCK OFF9 -
When someone, after explaining it for 10 FUCKING TIMES, still doesn't get that WE ARE NOT HOSTING HIS MOTHERFUCKING SERVER SO WE CAN'T FIX HIS FATHERFUCKING COCKSUCKING EMAIL ISSUES.
FUCKING HELL.13 -
Reading devRant feed is so fucking hard nowadays. Every other rant is about Windows rebooting, Google being evil, Quantum beating Chrome, M$ users being cunts and all these fanboy shits.
Fucking hell. Write some actual code and rant about some solid problems rather than being a stupid fanboy.12 -
Bulma framework, thanks for existing!
Lightweight, CSS only, very fucking easy to use and understand and a beautiful!
As a backend/server/security guy, front end is hell on earth for me. I understand the basics but that's it.
This fucker makes it so simple!21 -
FINALLY
GODDAMNED
FIXED
I'VE SPENT OVER A GODDAMN WEEK SWIMMING THROUGH DEMON EXCREMENT WITH A MAGNIFYING GLASS TRYING TO FIND THE SOURCE OF THIS SHIT.
I FINALLY FOUND IT. IN A FUCKING. CONDITIONAL. OVERLOAD. OF A MODEL GETTER.
THAT ABSOLUTE NONSENSE RETURNS EITHER THE REQUESTED COLUMN FROM THE DATABASE, OR AN ENTIRELY FUCKING DIFFERENT COLUMN, ALL DEPENDING ON THE VALUE OF A THIRD FUCKING COLUMN.
HKJSDFASKFJ
TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE.
THE VALUE IT RETURNS. IS COMPLETELY WRONG. FOR ALMOST. EVERY. FUCKING. CASE.
BECAUSE THAT FIRST COLUMN? IT NEVER GETS UPDATED. EVER.
AND THIS DEALS WITH ACCOUNTING AND REAL GODDAMN MONEY.
AARRGHHHHH
WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!31 -
I was going to be very productive today.
My current 100kbs speed is making that any command entered into an ssh session has a delay of about 10-20 seconds.
My patience is being tested at some very high level right now.22 -
Although there's been a lot of rants on Firefox Quantum, I'm going to add my experience anyways.
Just downloaded it on my laptop and netbook.
Motherfucker this thing is fast. No lag, pages load very freaking fast, consumes less ram than before and I fucking love the new interface!
Mozilla, you did a hell of a job!28 -
Fucking hell! HTTP2 is really cool!
I've never really used in in production before, just played around with it, but combined with the Phoenix framework, which is freaking fast on it's own, it's a pleasure to see all the assets just pop up instantly without any effort. And SSL/TLS is a must in order to use it, that's another plus.25 -
FUCK HELL YEAH! I'm done with my FUCKING THESIS! I just handed it in - that filthy time eating piece of blood sucking papershit! God yes! I'm proud and relieved as fuck!
Got really sick as well! Fuck the stress! Fuck everything. I'm just gonna play Witcher 3 all day long with some nice cup of tea !
29 -
Ranted about him before but this just came to my mind again.
The fucking windows (to the max) fanboy I had to deal with for too long.
Every time I mentioned something about what programming language to use in a project he was NOT part of:
"I know it's none of my business, BUT I think you should use .net"
(All backend JavaScript and php guys).
Every time I mentioned something about what server system to use:
"I know it's none of my business but I think you should use Windows server"
(All Linux guys)
Every time I'd say something positive about Linux he'd search as long as needed to prove that that was also a windows thing (didn't even come close sometimes)
Every time I told the devs there about a windows security issue (as in "guys they found this thing, install the next update to stay safe :)" - "ahhh will do, thanks for letting know man!") he'd search as long as needed to prove that Linux also had had security issues like that.
(Okay?!? I know?!? I'm just trying to notify people so their systems stay secure and they're genuinely happy with that so STFU)
MOTHERFUCKER.21 -
MOTHERFUCKING HELL!
Documentation. Fucking write it and fucking keep it up to date!
I just spent a whole motherfucking hour scraping together information about some goddamn React library! That's an hour of my fucking life time I'd have rather spent getting tortured than fighting through fucking ShitHub and FucktardOverflow thinking of hate, and genocide and lollipops.
And of course, like with all FUCKING JS libraries, this one is the the hottest, greatest and best of the best, better and more exciting than an extra deep and sloppy blowjob while skydiving, BUT THE DOCUMENTATION SUCKS AN ELEPHANT'S COCK THROUGH AN EXTRA TIGHT GARDEN HOSE!
To all the lying, fucking pricks who love to publish and push undocumentated crap code and hype the living, cunting fuck out of it instead of FUCKING DOCUMENTING it:
GO FUCK YOURSELF WITH A RUSTY, CULTRATED, GONORRHEA-INFECTED SHOVEL YOU ASSCRACK-SNIFFING WEASEL-RAPING PRODUCT OF A MILLENIUM OF INCEST!22 -
A client called today because their email wasn't arriving at the receipants inbox but bouncing back with a 'poor MTA rating' error.
Checked about every blacklist I know and our server was definitely not blacklisted. Must be the receipants host which for some reason was blacklisting his specific email address.
Told the client that it wasn't a problem on our side and that he had to request a whitelist himself (we'd do it but it wasn't a specific server problem so we're not going to spend time on that).
Fair enough, he'd do that.
Calls back. "Well, the other party says that your server definitely has a poor rating, it's on your side!!"
Alright, this is getting annoying. Gave him a few blacklist checking sites links and told him to run his domain AND our server IP through it. Indeed came back completely clean.
"But the other party said it's poor rating on your side so I'd think tha........"
YEAH WHY DON'T YOU SHOVE THAT OTHER PARTY UP YOUR FUCKING ASS. I'VE SHOWN YOU PROOF THAT IT'S DEFINITELY NOT ON OUR FUCKING SIDE, EXPLAINED IT TO YOU AND SO ON. MAYBE, FOR ONE FUCKING SECOND, TAKE INTO CONSIDERATION THAT THE OTHER PARTY IS FUCKING LYING?!?!?
FUCK OFF.9 -
Okay..... phew.
I may have an unpopular opinion, but I.......
fucking hate these universal programming languages that try too hard to make cross-platform bullshit easy to develop for. THEY PISS ME OFF SO MUCH...
Like, for example:
1) Electron, node.JS or other desktop JavaScript shitware.
STOP FUCKING HAVING 2000 BILLION DEPENDENCIES, LIKE WRITE YOUR OWN ORIGINAL CODE AND TRY NOT TO FUCKING MAKE A MONOLITHIC FUCKING MONSTER OF A CODEBASE. I BET SOMEONE WROTE THE ENTIRETY OF GNU UTILS IN JS, WHAT THE FUCK?!
2) Java
Yea, let's make a platform that everyone needs a fucking VM for. Sounds great. And also fuck OS GUI guidelines and make our own cancerous looking solaris shit UI, yay.
3) C#
Microsoft: We will make a UNIVERSAL programming language like C++, but with some stuff from Java.
Everyone: yay
Microsoft: Universal under Windows platforms that is...
Me: go fuck yourself, you greedy cunt. Atleast Apple has the decency to make Objective-C work on non Apple software, unlike YOU. FUCKING CHEAP BASTARD.
4) Python
I don't have much against it, but having pip seperate from the package manager on Linux (atleast) is annoying as fuck. And also compiling it into a executable would be "THE FEATURE" and not some 3rd party shitty solution that fucking breaks in a year or two.
Come to think of it, people SHOULD FUCKING STOP TRYING TO MAKE A NO-PORTING UTOPIA SOLUTION, BUT INSTEAD FOCUS ON MAKING IT EASIER TO PORT. A little "#define MYFUCKINGOS" wouldn't fucking hurt, you know. Because at the end if you run a VM, interpreter, have a shit ton of dependencies or just are a fucking monopolistic asshole, you're gonna piss off and divide people.
Image source: https://reddit.com/r/...
29 -
I don't fucking understand this. Why the hell does every website has a autoplay video in their website?
I don't want to see your fucking video when I open your article, I am fucking trying to read something.14 -
First on the phone this afternoon and also a crapload of tickets.
*alright let's do some tickets*
*tringgggggg*
*fair enough, phone comes first*
*half an hour later call finishes*
*alright, tickets!*
*tringggg*
*alright phone first again*
*handles call, hangs up*
*Aaand tickets!*
*Tringgggggggg*
*oh come on I need to do tickets :/*
*handles call again and closes convo*
*Aaaand now: ticke... *TRINGGGG*
*oh come on!!*
*handles call once again*
*please don't interrupt me now, I need to do those ti.... *TRINGGGG MOTHERFUCKER*
*fucking hell!*
*handles call and tries to stay calm*
*now tickets!*
*types reply, presses repl... *TRINGGGG 😈*
*OH FOR FUCKS SAKE*
*handles call once a-FUCKING-gain*
*if the phone rings now...*
*goes to the reply button again and: clic.... *TRINGGGGGG - GO FUCK YOURSELF!*
FUUUUUUUCKING FUCKING FUCK.
FUCK. TODAY WAS ANNOYING AS HELL.12 -
Fuck Microsoft.
No, not in any relation to windows this time.
Dear Microsoft, why on earth did you put us on your spam blacklist? There haven't been any spam attacks from our side, our servers have nearly the highest 'reputation' that email servers can get, we comply to all security standards and yet you're blacklisting us.
If for some reason you think something is wrong at our side anyways, we've tried to contact you and we either get ignored or get a very late response saying that we'll get delisted again within a day/week or whatsoever.
Microsoft, please go fuck yourself.25 -
Holy fucking hell!
Who the fuck sets up a local network with an 255.255.0.0 subnet mask and then lets the dhcp-server distribute clients onto the 192.249.x.x., 192.2.x.x and the 192.22.x.x networks AT FUCKING RANDOM???
I need to SSH onto 40 routers distributed across the entire campus and have a WORKING internet connection while doing so and you make me spin the connect-disconnect-wheel. Fucking hell dude, don't give me that "Uh, it wasn't intended for this size"-bullshit. You have about 200 active devices. And in one subnet you have space for more than 60 000. Fuck you, dumbass! OH, YOUR FUCKING LIST IS FUCKING WRONG AND YOU DON'T REMEMBER THE IP OF THE ROUTERS? OH FUCK YOU EVEN HARDER!!!
Goddamn people why does legacy maintenance always suck so much?😭😭😭4 -
After it was revealed that the Equifax hack was even bigger yet again, the US government said something that really made me say/think something in the trend of "WHAT the actual FUCK?!"
"This data is in the hands of cyber criminals anyways".
You run the biggest mass surveillance program in the world, sucking up more than a million terabytes every hour, then at least could you PRETEND to care/take interest when the personal data of about all your citizens appears on the Internet?!
Fucking hell.12 -
We build a backup infrastructure at work to make sure that clients can restore their files and databases themselves when something gets fucked up.
We also have step by step tutorial on how to do this.
Every fucking day we get requests to restore backups.
Mostly used reason is "I'm a technical so I won't understand it".
With all due respect, if you don't understand this and keep asking without even trying, please don't host with us.
Because, if you did as I asked and actually read through the entire article, you would.
In case you're wondering, anytime one of us asks what part they don't understand, that question is simply ignored and they pushing for us restoring it anyways continues.
Sometimes they get angry and want to talk to someone higher up or start complaining that they're paying loads of money already and that it would just take us a second anyways.
If you would read the fucking tutorial/manual instead of trying to eat out your mother's badly shaved pussy and hopefully choke on it while you're at it, you wouldn't come asking us for it.
If you genuinely don't understand this article, feel free to ask but also provide us with cocksucking feedback.
Why do you think you have the right anyways to ask us to do it for free? We maintain the backup infrastructure which definitely isn't cheap but we do it so that you, pubic sniffing weazel, can do this shit on your fucking own.
You're entitled to ask us for help but not for asking us to restore your bullshit for free every freaking time.
Tip: give your parents some condoms. Because that way they hopefully won't reproduce again, we don't need more of you in this universe.13 -
Here's an interesting fact: people who use four spaces for indenting JavaScript code also enjoy molesting cats and eating boogers.31
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A quite severe vulnerability was found in Skype (at least for windows, not sure about other systems) allowing anyone with system access (remote or local) to replace the update files skype downloads before updating itself with malicious versions because skype doesn't check the integrity of local files. This could allow an attacker to, once gaining access to the system, 'inject' any malicious DLL into skype by placing it in the right directory with the right file name and waiting for the user to update (except with auto updates of course).
From a company like Microsoft, taking in mind that skype has hundreds of millions of users worldwide, I'd expect them to take a very serious stance on this and work on a patch as soon as possible.
What they said about this: they won't be fixing it anytime soon as it would require a quite big rewrite of skype.
This kinda shit makes me so fucking angry, especially when it comes from big ass companies 😡. Take your fucking responsibility, Microsoft.26 -
"Would you answer my email already, you idiot?"
Would you tell me what fucking email you're talking about or who the hell you even are, you mental cripple?12 -
Friend: Can you teach me to code??
Me: Hell yes, bout time you came to your senses.
Friend pulls out iPad: Okay, lesson one!
Me: Did you actually just pull out an iPad? Get a fucking computer or laptop!12 -
Alright wikipedia, i see that you're in a crisis, but I just send 5€ your way. That should not be the fucking signal to unleash popup hell on me. Fucking 4 out of 5 pages now come with that popup. "if rveryone woukd just send $2..."
BITCH I SEND YOU 5€, STOP DEEPTHROATING ME YOUR UNGRATEFUL COCK11 -
Windows 10!! WHAT THE FUCKING WHAT do you think you're doing?? Why am I getting a message saying admin has blocked my access to Services when I AM THE FUCKING ADMIN! And I sure as hell didn't block me!!!!!!!!17
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Was today national 'lets not use our brains and common sense' day or something?!?
People coming with the most fucking RETARDED questions.
'ive spend hours to try and figure out why my mail isnt sending,?!'
MAYBE TRY SPELLING YOUR FUCKING OWN EMAIL ADDRESS CORRECTLY?!?!?!
Tons more of the kind of shit that you can solve yourself within three FUCKING seconds.
I'm so fucking done with today.14 -
This is so fucking, fucking annoying.
Client (through ticket system): here's new nameservers my domain has to use, please enter them thank you!"
Me: you can easily do that yourself! *gives link to extremely fucking easy click-done tutorial*
Client: oh but I'm not technical, could you please do it anyways?
HAVE YOU EVEN FUCKING LOOKED AT THE LINK?!
THIS SHIT HAPPENS EVERY GODDAMN DAY.14 -
html {
design: responsive;
}
I fucking hate frontend webdeveloping... It was all nice! Vertically aligning items using flexbox etc... But then God said, "let there be cunts who use unsupported browsers!"
FUCKING HELL I HATE IT14 -
I hate this attitude of my study (when i studied):
"it might be a good idea to teach the students how to program securely by default?"
"oh no but we just want to teach them the basics"
"so why not the secure basics by default?!"
"nah we just want them to get started and understand it, that's all. We'll get to the secure way later on"
Well, fuck you.16 -
I AM A FUCKING IDIOT!!!!!!
I have a setDelta(float newdelta) function that set newdelta to the old delta!
Fucking hell!
I even made a fool of myself on stack overflow! Kill me now please!17 -
I've put my blood, sweat and tears into this company in the past years. Worked overtime, evenings, weekends, night shifts to get shit done and helped out in sharing knowledge only to learn a new guy who's still learning has 200 bucks higher pay check than me.
I'm not even sure how to react to this.19 -
There is a special place in hell for all those fucking morons who refuse to understand that there is no plural for the word 'code' you're referring to when talking about instructions for computers and machines.
It's code, NOT codes NOR codez, it's CODE, you stupid fucking wankers!
Goddamn, how I hate you intelligence allergic fuckwits.30 -
Dear clients.
Putting your support subject or content either in uppercase letters or telling US that your matter/ticket has 'the utmost priority' doesn't mean anything to us. You'll just have to keep in line.
WE decide the priorities. Also, calling us when we haven't looked into your very fucking high priority ticket yet for about 5 FUCKING minutes is NOT going to help YOU.
- One of the Linux Support Engineers.11 -
Fucking hell. If I like your bloody app, I'll go rate it myself you fucktwaddle. Don't ask me to rate it just after I've opened it for the first time.
10 -
Rain! Fucking RAIN! Godamn, motherfucking finally!
One more day with 35° fucking celsius and I'd have raided an ice cream parlor with an AK-47, smearing banana split and cookie crumbles over my cock and balls with one hand, and shooting at people with the other.17 -
"Can you make it pop more..."
A moment of silence please, for the same fucking, irritating word that every goddamn Joe, Jim and Jenny uses for describing how a site should look. What the hell is pop supposed to mean, you want an epilepsy warning I'll put some popping lights and nausea inducing Nyan cats across your screen. You want it to pop more, sure no problem...
There's a window over there, go fucking throw your PC out of it.12 -
This happens way too FUCKING often:
Random person: Hey, can I have your number so I can text you?
Me: Yeah sure! *gives number*
*A few days later*
Person: Hey you gave me your number to message you but I can't find you on whatsapp???
Me: no indeed....?
Person: Well, then why did you give me your number?!?
Me: you asked if you could TEXT me, I don't have whatsapp.....?
Person: Ohh but I meant whatsapping.... that's like the same
THAT'S NOT THE MOTHERFUCKING SAME!!! TEXTING != WHATSAPPING YOU FUCKING COCKSUCKING MOTHERFUCKING ANNOYING PIECE OF GRRRRRRRRR8 -
Forgot the password of the private key used to login to all my vpn servers.
Now I’ve got to generate a new one and deploy it everywhere again through this shitty control panel for every server fucking manually.
🤬30 -
What a fucking shit day. I'm glad it's almost over. Seriously, this day can slurp up a bucket of donkey cum, then gargle with it until it chokes to death.
I'll succumb to my Irish friend Jameson. If anybody needs me, fuck the hell off.23 -
Fucking hell, 14 hours of work so far for today.
Good to have work, even better to have interesting work, but I shouldn't work that long.
Fuck it, I'll listen to some Antigama and have a Jameson or three.10 -
WINDOWS DEFENDER FIREWALL IS SWITCHED OFF??????!??!?! OH MY GOD, WHAT WILL I DO?
HOW WILL I COPE??
ALL MY CODE IS UNDEFENDED AGAINST THE EVILS OF THE UNIVERSE!!!!!
SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING!!!!!
Oh, wait, my VM is on an isolated network, and behind a NAT, and the firewall is off because windows keeps resolving everything to IPv6 and I just needed to get the databases installed.
Fucking hell Microsoft, make your alerts a little less "end of the world" like, you fucking dramatic bastards!!!18 -
No. I don't start new WordPress projects again. Never. Fuck WordPress and fuck you.
Ask me once again, and, I swear by your mom's grimy, low-hanging balls, I will fucking end you.21 -
before programming class:
"yes easy af, imma finish this in a few minutes"
during programming class:
*types everything in 10 mins*
*compiles and runs perfectly*
"wtf this isnt supposed to happen"
*spends 30 minutes trying to find the bug*
"fucking hell, it should fucking work by now"
end of programming class:
"oh i put int instead of float, good job, my time was wasted because of one fucking word"12 -
!dev related but fucking hell I need to get this out.
Could people (including friends) fucking stop to invalidate my favourite music genre?!
'Its just too hard', 'its so aggressive', 'its only boom boom boom'
Fuck you.
Always, al-fucking-ways at every party or wherever when people are allowed to put on music, whenever I'm allowed to, my music is turned off right away.
'Sorry but not everyone likes this and you're not the only one here'
I'm sorry, WHAT? I'VE LISTENED TO STYLES I REALLY FUCKING DON'T LIKE FOR FUCKING HOURS AND I'VE SWALLOWED IT ALL. THEN AT LEAST LET ME PLAY ONE FUCKING SONG ON A WHOLE FUCKING EVENING.
And nothing against metal peoples, really not but its nearly always the metal people who put their music on all evening and keep telling how awesome metal is and the second I mention my genre or out it on: 'oh but that sucks' *switches back to metal*
Go fuck yourselves. I'm swallowing this shit every fucking time but I'm getting fucking sick of this bullshit.
By the way, my favourite genre is raw hardstyle aka rawstyle.73 -
It's starting.
I woke up today, and as I predicted, I had a total bangover.
1. My neck was stiffer than a catholic priest's cock when you leave them with a nine year-old for ten minutes.
2. I had a dirty footprint on my right leg (Lucifer knows where that came from).
3. I had minor bruises everywhere from people going crazy in the pit.
4. My arms hurt from heaving stage diving fat dudes through the venue.
5. I smelled of cigarette smoke and even more of sweat and beer, because I've had at least three beer showers and it was hot as balls yesterday.
6. My battle jacket had blood on it again (don't know whose, though, maybe it's from the guy whom I accidentally ran over; don't worry, though, I apologized and got him a beer).
Fucking hell, that's what I call a show.
And now I'll slowly make way for the creeping depression to conquer me again. But until it's apparent I'll blast 'Condition Critical' on full volume and have an IPA or twelve to counter the hangover that currently works me in a tag team with the bangover as if I had "fuck me hard, 'cause I'm a slut" tattooed on my forehead.
Hey, maybe I'll even write some code tonight.16 -
It's so swamp ass fucking hot and humid today, you could sail paper boats in a random stranger's asscrack.17
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FUCKING HELL, MICROSOFT!
4 Years ago someone told them that CSS transforms aren't working in SVGs in IE / Edge.
In 2018(!) it got FINALLY "fixed" and someone answered that this will function normally in the upcoming update.
Guess what, I now have this update.
DOESN'T SEEM LIKE IT WORKS NORMALLY!
4 FUCKING YEARS AND ALL THEY COULD DO IS THIS. IT'S NOT "NORMALLY"!
24 -
Nothing better on a Monday morning than oversleeping, realizing that that one server issue notification was a general notification app one and there actually have been loads of disruptions, trains are down...
If they're out of coffee at the station in fucking done with today already.6 -
FUCK YOU PHP!!!! FUCKING HELL JUST FUCK THE HELL OFF YOU PIECE OF SHIT.
8 GOD FORSAKEN HOURS SPENT TRYING TO ZIP SOME SHITTY FUCKING FILES IN A FOLDER ON MY WEB SERVER TO HAVE THEM DOWNLOADED TO MY CLIENT COMPUTER.... 8 HOURS UNABLE TO OPEN THE DAMN FILE AND THE ISSUE WAS "echo" & "print_r()" STATEMENTS GETTING TRAPPED IN MY ZIPARCHIVE BUFFER MAKING THE ZIP FILE A GIANT PILE OF UNREADABLE SHIT.
HOW IN GODS NAME WERE THOSE FUCKERS EVEN BEING ADDED TO THE ZIP FILE.
Fucking hell. Time to sleep.10 -
It's not enough that most JavaScript libraries are about as pleasant to handle as a perforated bag of jizz. Nope, their docs just have to be the equivalent of balancing said bag on your head.
No docs are more useful than those docs.
Fucking hell!7 -
The amount of common sense questions which would require an individual to use their brain and/or a search engine for approximately a few seconds in order to gain the knowledge needed to answer it themselves was TOO FUCKING GOD DAMN HIGH TODAY.
IT CAN REALLY FUCKING PISS ME OFF SOMETIMES.20 -
People who say something isn't working and ask us to investigate.
Alright, it's not on our side, go ask support at {differentcompany}.
*presents actual proof*
Client replies: oh but I asked the other side and they send over this proof *shows proof saying that its not on our side but very technical so the client doesn't understand* so it's definitely on your side!!!!!!
This annoys the living fucking hell out of me, FUCKING FUCK.
😡10 -
Why do people (Some devs too...) bloody hell think that devs have Hard time fixing the Semi Colon issue, we have a lot of other issues to figure out, like the Structure of Data, Code Fragmentation, API Creation, Invalid Data Handling, Injection Prevention. But no, since we are developers, we are having sleepless nights because of one fucking semicolon? FUCKING NO, it hardly takes 30 seconds to figure out that there is a missing semi-colon. Really People, stop the ; thing!10
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Umidigi, kindly go fuck yourself.
When --> I <-- buy a phone, I should be the fucking one who decides if I'm allowed to install a motherfucking custom launcher.
Your phone is awesome (second full day with heavy usage == 53 percent battery) but on the launcher thing, go fuck yourself. Also go to hell. No, go fuck yourself IN hell, that's even better.30 -
FUCKING HELL! I shouldn't have messed with my perfect Webpack setup.
I just dealt with fucking incomprehensible errors for two hours, which not even the fucking arsehole-scraping cocksucker who wrote the error messages could possibly have understood. And if he actually does, somebody should amputate his hands with a blowtorch and a rusty hacksaw. I'll gladly volunteer!
I love JavaScript, I really do, it's such a versatile, fun language – but npm, the JavaScript eco-system and the JavaScript community are fucking shit, and the latter are a bunch of worthless fucking hipster cunts. You heard me right! Choke on my dick, arseholes!
And while we're at it, fuck me with a splintered metal pole for going through this soul-piercing, ballsack-busting, hellish forlorn place called build-script optimization for two goddamn hours, just to shave 400 silly-ass milliseconds off my project's build time.
I hate myself more than I hate other people. And rest assured that's a whole fucking lot.5 -
Okay so about a year ago these FUKKING IDIOTS decides, against my recommendation, to do this quick-ugly-hack and ninja it into production.
I tell them its a FUCKING BAD idea that will blow up in a year or so...
But no, just go go go!!!!!!!
Now a year later, shit blew up badly. A total FUCKING derail. These new idiots asks me to "fix the problem", the same fucking problem I predicted and warned them about a year ago. So now i have to clean up their ducking mess because "Nobody else knows how to fix it".
What the FUCKING HELL do we pay them fuckkkers to do?!!
New idiots you ask? Yep, because 3 out of the 4 original fucktards already left the place in order to go and make some other new collegues lives fucking miserable.
FUCK YOU FUCKING MOOTHERFUUUKKKEEERRRRRSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!2 -
I fucking hate how the cursor in any goddamn input field behaves in Android! These shitty, annoyingly fiddly handles that you have to move around, piss me the fuck off every motherfucking time I have to use them!
Why are they always nearly impossible to grab right? Why are they so annoying to move? And tapping a place, then holding to paste text never works out the way it should. There is just nothing intuitive about that fucking shit at all, and I can't get used to it, even though I've been using Android phones for years. Tapping between two characters in order to replace the left hand side one is always a pain in the arse, often doesn't work at all.
Such a fiddly fucking shit, that makes me piss-eyed angry every fucking time!18 -
I fucking hate MySQL and MariaDB!
Why the cunting sideways buzzsaw horsefuck doesn't the fucking, shit-stained, arse-licking password work WHEN I JUST FUCKING SET IT?
I'm pretty fucking sure I entered the same fucking password, because I fucking COPIED it. FUCKING HELL!
Every motherwhoring time I have to set this faulty, buggy, fucked up piece of shit database up, it get the same fucking problems, and there is never a logical reason for it. I can't be the only one who has these problems, every goddamn time! Who actually uses this piece of shit unless they absolutely fucking have to?
FUUUUUUCK!42 -
!dev
It's one of those nights again. It's so hot that I'm constantly sweating my fucking ass off and its near impossible to ventilate here. Fucking irritated for some fucking reason and questioning all my fucking life and work decisions yet again.
I don't fucking need this right now. Have to get up in 6 hours but oh boy is this going to be a long night.22 -
Disabled fucking arrows keys in vim. Life is hell now.
I will be posting a lot more rants from now on as I am learning vim so bear with me.
21 -
I fucking hate when I'm using a framework and I add some autogenerated HTML to a view that fucks up my carefully, if not compulsively, indented markup.
GODDAMNED! The sheer amount of time I wasted by getting it just right again, just because otherwise my fucking OCD is driving me nuts, is fucking unreal.22 -
If you enjoy a soft mind fuck once in a while, build a multi-dimensional table head from an array of unknown depth without prior colspan or rowspan information where every group heading and first subheading are combined.
I'm pretty sure we have some tr00 1337 h4xx0rs here who will write down the code without blinking before done, but I gotta admit, it took me a while until I found a good solution.
At least this was fun and challenging, even though I feel dumber than usual now.17 -
Yeah, make a tutorial for a technology experts for which are well-sought after, and waste everybody's time right away by doing an extra shitty job explaining what the fucking technology is all about.
Who the flying rat's glans decides to learn a framework or programming language without at least being informed about what the fuck it is or what the hell it's used for before getting knee-deep into learning it, you stupid, fucking pickle tickler!
Just get on with it! JUST GET THE FUCKING HELL ON WITH IT, ARSEHOLE!5 -
I've just renewed my frontend masters subscription, because, fucking hell, they've got some amazing courses. I hadn't taken a peek in months. So I guess I'll be watching pretty much all day and play RUINER tonight.
Ahhh, dis is de loif!12 -
A single fucking CSS SELECTOR has over 12000 characters !!!!
JUST THE SELECTOR !!!
Just to add `color: #ffc311;` to a bunch of fucking elements !!!
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK !!!
Why not create a fucking class like `color--orange` and add that on all the elements you need to have that color, at least !!
THIS IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE !!!14 -
First fucking night of being on call again.
Normally I set an alarm at 3 to check if any critical disruptions have been going on.
But why the fuck would I need that if I woke up every fucking hour at night anyways?
I'm fucking tired right now and agitated as hell.5 -
I swear 90% of people who apply for a dev job couldn't code to save their fucking lives.
Like wtf? You can't apply for a job as a commercial pilot, then turn up and announce you've never flown a plane before, so why is that accepted as being somewhat expected in development?
Fucking hell....10 -
Fucking hell, how much I hate frontend!
Getting a tab system to work (bulma only exists out of css) has been taking me ages and its still not working.
I love nice interfaces but I just want to work on the backend 😭28 -
When you luckily come across the exact same question you have in mind posted to a forum:
User 1 - Please help! I can't solve x?
User 2 - OMG me too!
User 3 - Fucking hell....same here mate!
5 fucking weeks later...
User 1 - Hooaah! I solved it.....!
Thread closed.
People are so freaking selfish!3 -
Services/apps and their automatic general sayings. I fucking hate that.
'apping' is an abbreviation for either whatsapping someone or messaging them in general (in the Netherlands at least).
Sorry but I fucking hate WhatsApp and I'm not going to say that fucking app/apping word. But then in general it's confusing imo.
IF YOU'RE GOING TO TEXT ME, DON'T SAY YOU'RE GOING TO APP ME.
IF YOU'RE GOING TO SIGNAL ME, DON'T SAY YOU'RE GOING TO APP ME.
"but I meant that" - THEN FUCKING SAY IT.
I DON'T 'GOOGLE SOMETHING'. I FUCKING DUCKDUCKGO IT. NO, THAT'S NOT THE FUCKING SAME.
FUCKING HELL.23 -
I'm currently trying to get an overview of a really large and data-heavy React/Redux app, and I really hate how long it takes me to learn how other people's code works.
Skimming through dozens of files like a fucking idiot, trying to get a grip on what the fuck is happening when. The curse of inherited code littered with asynchronous requests, even though it's not that bad – everything does have it's rightful place and is neatly organized into containers, reducers, filters, etc. However, there are no comments at all and the README.md is empty.
I only do it, because I enjoy React/Redux and like both the company I work for and the people there; but fucking hell I sometimes cannot deal with the self-imposed pressure at all, even though nobody seems to expect that I'm done with it rather today than tomorrow. It's a huge code base after all and others have already given up, I'm also paid really well, but still, I thought I'd be a lot faster.
Wading through the unknown code is like a blissful annoyance, if that makes any sense at all; interesting as fuck, but very hard to see through. So I'm trapped in the limbo of being pissed off about my slow progress and the totally zen feeling of being able to do what I love doing once again.14 -
Suck a goat's grimy, filthy balls – why the fuck was I so stupid to make the linux firmware update now? This shit takes fucking long on my machine, and I was just done and ready to go.
Fuck, I'm such an idiot.30 -
I'm losing my fucking mind right fucking here.
Setting an anti-csrf token in the index.php file ONCE. Yes, I triple trillion checked, only fucking once.
Print it to the page as test, fair enough, looks good.
Send an ajax request to the server:
AN ENTIRELY FUCKING DIFFERENT TOKEN 😡
Fucking hell.19 -
FUCKING HELL!
Website: We use cookies to store your preferences improve your browsing experience.
[I agree]
[Opt out]
*Presses opt out*
Website: Oops, the page you were looking for was not found!
STICK SOME HOT METAL POLE UP YOUR ASS AND DIE IN A CORNER!!7 -
!firstRant
Can anyone relate to the fact that before you disturb your co-worker with an issue you should ATLEAST try fucking google?
Not to mention the documentation, stackoverflow, msdn, forums. Hell, once, I found the answer I needed on a freaking bakery forum.12 -
When you get a client from real MOTHERFUCKING hell.
You just really FUCKING want to say this:
Scorched earth MOTHERFUCKER. I will massacre you. Now SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME DO MY JOB.
First, take a big step back and literally, FUCK YOUR OWN FACE.
I will rain down an ungodly FUCKING firestorm upon you.
You're gonna have to call the FUCKING United Nations and get a FUCKING BINDING RESOLUTION to keep me from FUCKING destroying you.
I am talking SCORCHED EARTH MOTHERFUCKER.
I will MASSACRE you.
I WILL FUCK YOU UP!
But for your own sake you keep it at this:
Yes sir/ma'am :).9 -
Background: I'm not drunk yet, BUT I'M WORKING ON IT.
okay.
I just finished a second sprint on my React app. The first was to build a merchant onboarding flow. The second was to do substantial cleanup as I learned more about react/redux, and to create a "supply order" flow -- basically purchasing marketing materials and services. I finished that in a week, and I'm pretty proud. api-guy wanted it done in a day. i laughed. he probably could have, but it would have been a copy of the code in a new repo with some lines changed.
ANYWAY. it's all done and It's super pretty and works amazingly well. It has both the onboarding flow and the ordering flow, with a nice pop-out sidebar for navigation, namespaced actions, etc. Everything is pretty clean. I even added a cart to the ordering (despite everyone telling me not to) because wtf, what if someone wants to order TWO items? dumbasses. So I made that. it's sexy.
Anyway, it's all done and shiny and fancy and wonderful and I'd *love* to share screenshots if only it didn't give away where I worked. :<
... but the point of the rant!
After the first sprint, I made a copy of the repo so I could rework it and add more functionality without touching the original. (Hey! That's what a branch is for, right? Why didn't I branch it up?
well, read on)
I knew we were going to have multiple separate flows for this app: onboard, ordering, merchant tools, admin tools, support, etc. So, I wrote its server portion (the webpack builder + http server) so it would serve the same app at whatever url the user hit, and set a cookie containing that host+url. This allows the app to serve different content (basically showing/hiding content) based on the URL and future login roles. If someone hits /order, it would hide everything but the order flow. If they're a merchant, it would show all the merchant views plus ordering, etc.
tl;dr This way I can use the same codebase for multiple sites, drastically simplifying development, branding, and what have you. This new app could obv also be a drop-in replacement for the original onboarding project because of the above.
HOWEVER. this apparently isn't good enough for api-guy. He's terrified that adding/updating future components will affect all the existing content somehow.
so.
now we have three repos for basically the same codebase. 1) onboard aka "surfboard", 2) ordering, 3) merchant tools, aka "ferrari" (the "future" app).
Except.
1) "surfboard" is a very old version of the code. 3) "ferrari" is also old, since 2) "ordering" has newer content in it now.
... and somehow this is better?
fuck if i can figure out how.
His reasoning is "well, you won't be touching surfboard or ordering for 6 months, so now you don't have to worry about it." Sure, except, you know, it'll be a pain in the ass in 6 months now when I have a crapton of code and branding to redo. ffs.
Oh. We also have three Heroku pipelines for these three repos. for the same codebase.
and now you know why i'm drinking.8 -
I just changed a bunch of comments, log entries, and removed some blank lines from one of my controllers. Zero functional code changes. Everything worked before; now it runs only half the code, breaks, and throws strange errors.
Fucking hell.
Screw today.6 -
OH MY FUCKING GOD! WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU REWRITE A FUCKING PIECE OF CODE AND DON'T MAINTAIN ITS FUNCTIONALITY?
ARE YOU FUCKING MAD????
JUST SPENT 1 FUCKING HOUR TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHY THE FUCK THE DATA WASN'T BEING PASSED TO REDUX STORE!
YEAH, UNIT TESTING SURE IS A FUCKING WASTE OF TIME YOU DUMB FUCKING IDIOT THAT HAS MASHED POTATOES FOR A BRAIN!
GO ROT IN HELL YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!!!
NOW IF I DON'T FIX THIS SHIT MY ASS IS ON THE LINE BECAUSE I MADE THE FUCKING FUNCTIONALITY THAT YOU BROKE?? NO FUCKING WAY!
I DON'T CARE IF YOU ARE MY BOSS, I'M GONNA GIT BLAME THE SHIT OUT OF YOU IF ANYONE PISSES ME OFF!3 -
What fresh hell is this
.replaceAll("(//"?)([^//d]+)(//.?)([^//d]+)(//.?)([//d]{3})(//.?)([^/d]+)(//"?)","$1$2$3$4$5$6$7$8$9")
...who is fucking with me9 -
Working on adjusting a shell script to my needs.
The fucker quits execution after an apt update command is ran.
No reason, it just fucking quits. No error messages or whatever, nothing.
This script can go suck a cock.9 -
No, I'll not send you a new password to your own fucking homepage and I'll also not send you the reset link again.
Why? Since you are obviously still able to talk in whole sentences, albeit loooong and pointless ones, I am pretty goddamn sure that, like everything else you're doing, whatever you're doing in order to achieve your auto-lobotomy hasn't quite succeded, yet.
But that is good news, because it also means you should still be perfectly capable to click the FUCKING reset link, enter your FUCKING email address and reset your FUCKING password all by yourself, like the allegedly grown up woman you are.
Yes, ALONE! BY YOURSELF! Without stealing my precious time that you'll probably even refuse to compensate me for again, because apparently 'resetting a password is not real work' – so why in the fucking hell don't you fucking do it yourself in the first place, you COCK-JUGGLING THUNDERCUNT!6 -
I want to be PROGRAMMING on the freaking privacy site already, not having to search for icons, download them in the right color/format etc.
Fucking hell. (although finding good/fitting icons is a funny challenge though :P)27 -
Github bought by Microsoft.
GitLab migrating to Google.
I Already didn't use github but I'm a - that'll change soon - gitlabber.
Post alternatives in the comments please!41 -
12 - 1pm is lunch time. What the hell is it with this team and arranging meetings for this time, does nobody eat?
*Propose new time*
Justification: ... i'm fucking hungry4 -
Well, so much for learning Nerves. The docs are full of errors and outdated as fuck, particularly in combination with Phoenix. Unfortunately, even already knowing Phoenix pretty well doesn't help much either.
Wonder-fucking-ful. Now I have to collect everything in fucking small bits by using the trial and error approach once again, because there are very few actual tutorials worth half a shit or they're old as fuck too.
Why does this always happen when I'm either already in the middle of having fun or very fucking close to hitting a quickly approaching deadline like a train would a deer with 200km/h.
Fucking hell!4 -
All respect to android (love the system (no, that doesn't mean that I love google)) and also to awesome custom roms (hell even some vendors make quite good ones imo!).
BUT WHO THE FUCKING HELL THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO LIMIT THE AMOUNT OF ALARMS YOU CAN HAVE TO 15 OR EVEN LIMIT IT AT ALL?!?
I HAVE TO GET UP AT 3:30 FOR WORK EACH NIGHT AND THIS IS *NOT* HELPING.
THE PERSON WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA CAN TAKE A PHONE, OPEN THAT DEFAULT CLOCK APP AND SHOVE IT UP HIS FUCKING ASS.28 -
Dear Developers,
A. Please put your fucking functions in files with names related to the purpose of the functions.
B. Don't define your database management methods in your goddamn configuration file.
C. In addition, fucking document your shit at the top of the file if you refuse to abide by request A.
Someone is going to maintain or modify this code after you, and that person will have a hell of a time with it.4 -
Client: hey ***, happy birthday can you help me fixing....
Me thinking: hell no, i deal with yall fuckers 364 days a fucking year and yall can't leave me the hell alone for one cocksucking day. I need this one damn day a year not dealing with yall assholes where i don't snap and drive 300 fucking miles to not drive a nail in a broomstick and drive it up your fucking asdls7 -
Fucking hell!
The new Septicflesh album is amazing to listen to while programming. If you're into symphonic metal, blackened death metal and similar genres, try it.22 -
Internal support article to get access to a tool:
"To get access click 'NO' in the 'was this article helpful section' and open a support ticket, making sure to mention the tool you are looking to get access to"
What fucking fresh hell is this? Why not have the article, contain the fucking link to open the ticket.
You have intentionally put up a useless article, in order to hack your way around this stupid system.2 -
Same situation as my previous rant.
Was building the dynamic page loader thing (basically mvc part) but it just DIDN'T FUCKING WORK.
As a last resort I chose the views to render based on a few if-else's 😅
Hacky as hell but it saved me from doom! -
C++ has become cockpit of Boeing 747
Too many controls? Yes.
Takes shitton of time to get ball rolling? Yes.
You need just bunch of them to get stuff done? Hell yes.
You still have to learn a lot of them if you plan to become professional? Yes.
You need to touch most of the fancy stuff only once in a while? Yes.
Many controls you wont be touching except once or twice in your whole career? Hell fucking yes.
You need those fancy controls when shit goes tits up? You better have them, or you are dead!
Creds: A.M.
3 -
Fucking retards. They make us submit 3 fully fledged fucking Android apps (with ALL the generated boilerplate crap), all zipped into one fucking folder which cannot exceed 10MB.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, YOU DUNG-EATING PREHISTORIC APE ?! ONE PROJECT ALONE IS 60 MB, HOW IN THE MOTHER-FLIPPING HELL DO YOU EXPECT ME TO FIT 3 OF THOSE INTO 10 MEASLY MEGABYTES?!
Ever heard of git you moth-eating-cactus-fucking pricks?! Time has come to learn it !!! Private repos are a thing, you cocksuckers.
May your bed be infested with bugs and your code riddled with Greek semi-colons. Fucking dimwits.9 -
Who the fuck designed the UI of linkedIn? When I click on My Connection, I expect to see my fucking connections. Not People I may know, Not my recent invitations, no fucking bullshit. Just my connection.
They have a small fucking text (Not even a fucking button) that says "See All" in a small corner which I can click to see all my connections. Why the fuck do you a nav button on top called "My connection" then? FUCKING HELL MAN!6 -
FUCK! agshdklgdahgisdahl;k!
I just spent 45 FUCKING MINUTES debugging try to figure out WHY THE HELL a function that is supposed to return either a pointer to a valid object OR ZERO if a valid object is not found, was RETURNING FUCKING EIGHT!
Then I saw it... I typed:
nodeList[index];
instead of:
return nodeList[index];
It took me looking at a stack trace and a disassembly of the function to realize this.
Can't wait for this three-day weekend...20 -
I fucking hate it when I'm working and people come and ask 'What are you doing ?' .. Even if they mean well ..
I'd be happy to show them and explain the hell out about finished product though .. !2 -
small reminder: building your own operating system means that you are forced to scan the memory by yourself...
FUCKING HELL PLEASE KILL ME NOW28 -
OK, I've had enough of this bullshit!
Why the hell do some people pronounce 'Z' as 'C' !?!
FUCK THESE PEOPLE!
Now, you might ask yourself: "But how is this tech related?".
WELL... I was trying to get into a server and had someone spell the password for me; AND GUESS WHO MISSPELLED THE PASSWORD THREE FUCKING TIMES SO HE GOT LOCKED OUT OF THE FUCKING SERVER BECAUSE OF THIS SHIT!!!
FUCK . FUCK . FUCK . FUCK . FUCK!!!!!20 -
Dear namecheap, I honestly love your service and prices but how in the hell can I see an ip address in the dig of a new domain (url shortener) which I never put or saw there and which doesn't even belong to any server I own/operate?!
DNS cache after the last chance of three days ago, nah, don't think so.
Fucking hell.7 -
I fucking hate when I'm trying to achieve something so complicated and abstract that I cannot put it into words without sounding cryptic, because then I can't google the solution properly, and when I post a question on StackOverflow it sounds incomprehensible as fuck.
Fucking hell! It's on the tip of my tongue, but I can't express it to save my life.7 -
Does anybody know how to disable that the mouse pointer gets hidden after a about half a second, when not moving it?
This is annoying the high holy fucking hell out of me, and I don't know how to properly search for a fix, because all that comes up are questions how to *hide* it permanently and even though that should point me in the opposite direction, nothing works.
It should be fucking able to disable this somehow, for fuck's sake. Normally I wouldn't care, but this stupid feature seems to also affect tooltips, particularly in Firefox/Chrome dev tools and hover effects ion Websites like Netflix by closing tooltips/hover states in a matter of milliseconds which is fucking annoying.
I neither have the time nor the patience to deal with this shit any longer, all the more because I seem to suck at solving this kind of problems and nothing seems to stick.
I'm using XFCE 4.12 on Linux Mint 17.2 (will soon upgrade anyway, but can't right now) and an M5 Logitech mouse, so I suspect it's entirely a software issue.21 -
You motherfucking piece of shit application form...
I was filling a long form in a tab and I had another part of that form open in another tab.
They fucking logged me out of the 2nd tab and didn't notify or prevent me from filling up hundreds of fields in the 1st tab.
Now I have to fill them up again.
Fuck you and your stupid form. Die in hell you fucking stupid cunt. -
I fucking hate Christmas, but in the.next few days, I'll eat perverse amounts of good food, get shitfaced, play video games with my little brother and program whatever the fuck I want. Everybody else can go to hell, and if a request isn't about a server going down, I'll ignore it.
Fuck, yeah – ten days with beer, food, metal, games and my own code.8 -
I understand the fact that your website uses cookie but fucking hell it can use it to remember that I accepted 7373738594929738849393 times2
-
I finally got Redux-Form’s `initialValues` to work! Wooooo~!
/giphy confetti cheering
It turns out I haven’t actually been doing anything wrong for the past week. I mean, I've been working on other things during that week, too, but I've been trying to solve this the entire time.
The cause? ReduxForm made a breaking change awhile ago (v5; we’re using v7) that prevents the `initialValues` prop from working if you decorate your form component in the wrong order. Many examples online are incorrect because of this.
Basically, the decorators `reduxForm` and `connect` do not commute:
Incorrect:
`reduxForm(...)( connect(..., {...})(form) )`
vs Correct:
`connect(..., {...})( reduxForm(...)(form) )`
But what really pisses me off is that the fucking documentation specifically fucking states that you may decorate your component IN ANY [FUCKING] ORDER.
/giphy that is [fucking] false
So, I've been following example after [fucking] example that either list these in the wrong order, or I just don't notice the different order because it doesn't matter. AND because of that NONE OF THE [...] EXAMPLES WORK.
ARGH.
I've been pacing around the office trying to figure this out for days. I've rewritten my code three times to try to solve this. I've written two workarounds for it only to rip them out and try again because they both broke some other part of the UX. (e.g. causing false validation errors after rerender)
just. hafhsldkjhgjkhagklwhsdjfkahslf. 😡
/giphy angry hades
You know how I discovered this?
I found it in a github ticket. One solitary, untagged ticket from October of last year. Not a single goddamn post anywhere else mentioned this. And the [...] documentation specifically [...] states the [...] opposite!
Bloody [...] hell.
but it finally works.
as;kgjhaekl;gahgjkdflssdafh.
I could scream.7 -
hardest part of finding a job related to ur developing skills is that theyre asking for years of experience
fucking hell thats why im looking for a job to get more experience4 -
Let's apply dark theme to the sun. So that I can at least stay away from my airco for 2 fucking minutes and not sweat like a goddamn pig!!! Over a month of this shitty heatwave it's been already.. it never ends, does it?! Fucking hell - literally!!!
Sorry for repost. Apparently it's not possible to edit the tags anymore, and I didn't want this to land up in wk116.10 -
*phone rings*
Me: "Hello".
Caller: "Hi, I'm just going to patch you in to this conference call."
Fucking hell.3 -
This fucking call is still going, and this asshat who should know how to do SIMPLE FUCKING COMMANDS LIKE MV AND CP is having a hell of a time and I'm about ready to throw my arm at him because I ok hurt like hell and hopefully knock some sense into his brain.4
-
Why The Fuck do you always have to say "Yes"?
I'm asking for a goddamn opinion. Give me an opinion.
But no, everything I say must be fucking gold 'cause it's always "yes", "you're right", "good idea", "I agree".
It's irritating as hell. It's "yes" even when I say something stupid on purpose.
Learn to say no, for fuck's sake.13 -
So yesterday I said to my private laptop update and shutdown...
Fast forward to this morning. Hell breaks loose. Have to fix it asap! We have downtime. But fucking windows update!!!
You fucking peace of shit should have done this yesterday. And why does it have to take so long.
11 -
WELL GEE, IF I KNEW WHAT MY ACCOUNT USERNAME WAS, I WOULD JUST SIGN IN YOU ASSHOLE. -.-
On top of that, they use these fucking anchent capchas that are fucking case sensitive and annoying as hell..
In their defence, I was trying to automate their website (one of those get paid to click sites) in an atempt to get some money, but still!
6 -
What the hell is wrong with you guys taking screenshots with your goddamn phone?! Ever heard of that small magical programm called "snipping tool"? It's like fucking screenshot porn! And yes, there is a screenshot programm on Linux too. Goddammit. Are you devs or fucking newbie users?19
-
Was my prev dev fucking high or what?
Who names an UPDATE Query as delete.
That shitfuck deserves a special place in hell.
21 -
I'm always dissatisfied and annoyed with how control panes/bars are usually handled in i3. i3bar and i3blocks suck, I've never build anything with it that didn't suck or wasn't a nightmare to maintain, but had everything I wanted. Polybar seems decent, but the amount of packages you need to install to build it from source annoyed me already. It's pretty configurable, though.
I have my WM set up nicely so far, named workspaces with Icons whose sequence is name agnostic; nice, minimal theming; programs I use the most are all dedicated to a specific workspace; spare workspaces for random stuff; shortcuts are set up; monitor setups are good; laptop specific controls are accounted for (battery state, screen brightness, etc.); and setting all that up was even mostly fun.
But getting the bar to behave the way I want is getting increasingly annoying. I feel I have to do it, though, for productivity's sake (particularly to eliminate distractions and needless repetition), and my peace of mind. I'm fucking obsessing over this, it doesn't feel healthy.
I wish I wasn't like that, but well. It's times like this when friends and family ask me to see a psychologist, because '[I] might be on the spectrum'.
I'm probably not. But I can't deny my obsessive nature. It's a sort of exhausting bliss that keeps me from sinking into another depressive phase for a while.
Meh.12 -
I really hate fucking Wordpress!
I hate it's stupid API, with it's stupid hooks and actions and all those stupid functions and no fucking logic to any of it!
I hate it's stupid plugin system, with all that fucking overhead that brings no real value and adds all that complexity for nothing!
I hate stupid fucking multiple calls for the same fucking assets, loading them over and over again because every stupid plugin calls them again and again!
I hate motherfucking SHORTTAGS, or whatever the fuck they are called!
I hate that every stupid fucking plugin and shortcode and fucking every little fucking piece of HTML comes from a different fucking place, with different fucking structure and different fucking classes and stupid fucking loading seaquences that make no fucking sense!
And I hate fucking page builders !!!!!
Fuck!!!!
I should be fucking coding on this fucking peace of shit, but I just cannot fucking take it any more!!!
IT NEEDS TO FUCKING DIE!
It should be relegated to the darkest corners of the internet and all the servers that have it's fucking code anyware on their systems should be disconnected and buried in the deepest pits of hell, just to be sure it never, EVER, surfaces again!!!
AAARRRRGGGHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!7 -
In my office they forced us to use Darwin Box. We need to login and click on clock in once we come to office. Fucking irritated. Who the hell remembers to clock in.
I wrote a simple Python code to clock in and made it as launched jobs.
Automatic clock in. *No Worries* 😅
#ProudToBeDev
Here is github:: https://github.com/Gowtham95india/...5 -
FUCKING HELL
Just spent the past week or so work on a project. Was doing final bug fixes/optimization AND GOD DAMN WOULDN'T YOU KNOW I BROKE THE WHOLE GOD DAMN PROJECT AND MY LAST COMMIT WAS LIKE 2 FUCKING DAYS AGO BECAUSE I'M A FUCKING BRAINDEAD TOASTER
FUCK2 -
Android Studio Installation.
What is the fucking point of giving an option to install the software somewhere other than C drive when the installation fails if done so.
Fucking cunts, multi billion dollar company my ass. Go to hell you stupid fucks.15 -
I wonder if the meeting at Rubber ducks quack association goes like this...
Why the hell doesn't my guy see the problem? It's fucking right there! Why don't you see it??? OMG! I request for a change of owner.1 -
Holy fucking weasel's balls! Installing the dependencies of a large Node app via a crappy 6Mbit/s connection is a goddamn pain in the arse!3
-
- Let's write some code to check for memory leaks
- Oh shit, memory is leaking like crazy
- In fact the program crashes within 10 minutes
*Some hours of debugging and not finding the cause later*
- Starts thinking about the worse
- Hell yeah, the memory leak is caused by the code that checks for memory leaks. But fucking how
- Finds out the leak is caused by the implementation of the std C lib
- In the fucking printf() function
- Proceeds to cry5 -
That moment when you spent an entire day making an awesome webpage (dark themed) and your pm tells you to change almost everything in it because he wants a light-themed website.
Fuck Everyone
(BTW now half the website is dark-themed and other half light-themed because pm doesn't know what he wants)8 -
You fucking dense motherfucker of a professor. You mentally disabled shit-eater. You fucking perfectly know that I have been offered a very good position in a company I really wanted to work at and you fucking force me to stay and wait for the next graduation date to make me get my fucking degree. Just because you offered me a PhD position and I didn't want it.
I sincerely hope you lose all your prestige. Fucking choke with a big ass cock in your throath, eat your own vomit disgusting piece of shit. You are a fucking 60yo child. You have no respect for people work, you always want more. Get cancer fucking animal.
HOLY SHIT HANG URSELF9 -
Being under 1000 rep on stackoverflow is elo hell. All you get are downvotes for non-duplicate, sensible and well explained questions. I think most of SO community is pretty fucking toxic towards people trying to learn programming.11
-
I fucking hate Captcha. fucking hate it. It's annoying as hell. Thrice in a row, it has recognised me as a robot.11
-
Dear XCode I hope you fucking burn in hell you piece of shit! can't do anything without that shit either indexing, or freezing, or crashing!
FUCK YOU BITCH!9 -
holy fucking hell, who’s dumb ass idea was it to make Visual Studio require a god damn fucking update for the installer before I can uninstall it, you stupid ass dumb fucks MS, I didn’t just tell you uninstall it so you can go burn more data down my shitty copper pipes.3
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Waking up at 5-6am every morning with insomnia is fucking hell. I just can't anymore. I feel dead and I hate everyone I see.16
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Some genius at Google Chrome team just fucked up the minimise, close buttons of the application in KDE.
Thank man, just what I needed.7 -
Worst part: being everyone else's Search Bitch. Seriously, how the hell do you have a job in the tech industry when you can't use a fucking search engine, whether it's Google, a builtin search facility or, hell, scrolling down the goddamn page?3
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Please stop pasting screenshots into Word docs and emailing them to me. What the hell is wrong with you? You are on a fucking Mac. You figured out how to grab a screen region with an obscure key combination, but you can’t figure out that you can paste them directly into Gmail, Apple Mail, or Thunderbird?7
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!rant
So, uh.
Just came back from my vacation, only to find out that my PC is now broken.
Like, it doesn't turn on.
Great.19 -
CSS - Separate style from content...
Yeah... More like creating divs to make that fucking div aligned.
Straight from table hell to div hell2 -
I cant fucking wait for the day when i dont have to do fucking frontend just give me a backend, even fucking php is fine just get me away from javascript this is hell this is torture help9
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Tried the CTF from MR.robot and holy crap that was fucking fun !!!
Spoiler: If you want to try it don't look down !!
//WTF hell is that I want to make it not show the down part with fucking dots and its not working have to type some stuff ahhhh.
@dfox
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Funny part was the bad configured nmap haha.
I can say that I recommend it to anybody who wanna to try it out.7 -
Fucking hell im stupid. Why did I promise to my professor that i could make a functional web browser in 2 months...WHYYYY!! Even though i did finish the project, behind the nice interface, everything is a mess and now im here crying about it on DevRant. Hooray!!14
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there's this club at my school, called STEM, and another called "science olympiad." both are pretty cringey, bad, or boring. science olympiad was just for the college credit. during the intro to the club, they said there was a coding section. "game on!" is what they dubbed it as, where basically you're timed to make a game in scratch. i'm fucking tired of it. why is scratch considered programming? don't get me wrong, i'll write an OS in PHP before i say code.org is better than scratch, but fuck it. its a fucking interpreted language that's interpreted by another interpreted language. i don't understand why this shit is still used. scratch isn't good. please codecademy or w3schools or just write in binary directly, but not scratch. my hand hurts from dragging and dropping, my eyes hurt from the light theme, my imaginary cat committed suicide after learning about scratch's mascot. fuck it. now onto stem club, fuck it too. not for being bad (well, kinda), but for not being more recognized. it should be above science olympiad, and other clubs because you actually have to think instead of just memorize. but alas, we still were offered the choice of scratch to program the robot. sigh. arduino much? i guess not. challenging much? nope. was i elected "leader"? with three of my friends out of the eight there, i could have been, but no. effort in this would be depressing.1
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The boss made us to set a shitty background (pattern) to the website we are working on right now but it looks ugly as hell. I tried to change his mind several times but no, he fucking loves that background.7
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Just arrived at the vacation home, turns out the "free" wifi is dead as hell, because quote; "a tree fell on a wire"
Which first of all that is fucking bs because they have internet at the reception still so that shouldn't work either right? But okay we now live without internet for the coming 3 days we are relying on our data plan....6 -
Fucking lazy customer support that files bugs with "<some functionality> is not working" with no steps to reproduce or any other description of the issue, deserve to die in the same hell as it is figuring out the rest of the details.
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Why the hell is AutohotKey so fucking powerful.
I literally wrote a thing that edits the registry and calls a Windows DLL, which causes the cursor to change and the mouse buttons to toggle (for a friend), in just under 30 lines excluding empty lines and comments.3 -
I switched mobile carriers because the website for my carrier did not work properly. Now that I’ve switched I go to log in to the website for the new carrier and it doesn’t work either. What the fucking hell people, do you only support internet explorer or something? What the damn hell is going on?1
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Fucking piece of shit windows 10!
Screw you to hell!
Disk usage : 100%
Memory usage: 60%
CPU usage: 2%
Sluggish as hell! And downloading updates without even asking! How fucking dare you!
Stuck with this shit just because of Photoshop and Illustrator.11 -
When you get a call into the helpdesk:
" It doesn't work!! "
What doesn't fucking work???!!!!??? And who the hell is this anyway?2 -
WHY Atom, when I explicitly select a suggestion do you NOT ACTUALLY AUTOCOMPLETE THE SUGGESTION ?
I have configured so many fucking settings to try to avoid this why is it that I have to explicitly select my option 3 and 4 times before you ACTUALLY auto fill it.
I use you specifically FOR the auto complete function and you FUCK ME OVER ON IT.
I can just not seem to find a text editor or IDE that doesn't annoy the shit out of me one way or the other16 -
I just had my first "Group project"-experience and holy fucking shit am I about to explode right now.
I messaged you one fucking week before the project is due and ask for your input that none of you contributed to and if that was too advanced for you imbeciles to handle then HOW THE HELL ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO SURVIVE THREE MORE FUCKING YEARS IN CS. THEN YOU HAVE THE DECENCY TO RESPOND SIX FUCKING HOURS AFTER THE PROJECT IS DUE AND COMPLAIN ABOUT THE WORK.
WELL GUESS WHAT YOU FUCKING WASTE OF MOLECULES, I ALREADY TURNED IT IN AND THE ONLY REGRET I HAVE IS PUTTING YOUR FUCKING NAMES ON THE PROJECT.
I DRAGGED YOUR SORRY ASSES TO THE FINISH LINE AND THEN YOU HAVE THE COURAGE TO ASK "WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG"?
NEXT TIME AT LEAST HAVE THE COURTESY TO SPIT BEFORE YOU FUCK SOMEONE OVER4 -
OMFG!!! Internet Explorer does not support includes() wtf?? Thinking this is such a basic fucking method I did not test and pushed a feature to production just get a call from customer service....wtf!!!!!!!! This is why I hate javascript!!!! Fucking hell.....polyfill this bitch and it is fixed, but still this is such fucking bullshit....8
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I am so pissed right now. I just subscribed to newscientist.com and paid for a subscription, it was not cheap! 21.95 quarterly....and it goes to a maintenace page!!! Don't let me sign up and pay for a fucking service and send me to a maintenance page!!! Then set new password in the email I recieved GOES TO A FUCKING MAINTENANCE PAGE!!!
I try email, it is undeliverable!!! web chat, nope....How the fuck does an organization running a paid subscription service fuck up so badly!!
If I am paying for something, you better goddamn better make sure it is right...or don't charge me!!!13 -
FUCK! The fucking previous dev on this project who set up the fucking web service that he knew would be shared among multiple platforms set it up to use an audio format that's only supported on one platform. Now I'm faced with either doing some fucking JS black magic to decode the fucking base64 audio, convert it to another audio format, and then possibly re-encode it or attempting to re-write the fucking web service and already in production app! Fucking hell!1
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Oh for fucks sake, I only agreed to fix one fucking problem in your shit hole of a wordpress hell, not everything your sorry excuse of a "wordpress expert" fucked up.
We need time travel asap!4 -
I'm pissed off as fuck. By far these were the worst fucking 2 weeks in a very long time.
My grandma died. At work I had to do shitty tasks and IT support for stupid end users, like an overpayed PC technician. I couldn't find any time to write a single line of code on any of my personal projects.
And I still can't find a fucking developer job. I feel like I'm stuck in this IT hell forever.
Kill me3 -
Grable its fucking bullshit and its slow as hell but ohh well i must use it for android.
And one library for sound in C was too fucking slow and complex as hell. -
Fucking gnu gettext, fucking .po and .mo files and fuck the fucking poedit. Why in the fucking hell a damn i18n solution used by so many languages doesn't support correctly fucking utf 8 characters in strings inside the code, I mean, WHAT THE FUCK, this is my second day trying to make the fucking Python gettext module to translate the fucking word "está" because I've a fucking big code base programming in Spanish that need to be translated. This is the fucking 2016 and we still have problems with fucking special characters? I mean CMMON1
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Me: ok let's clone my repo and work on adding some legit features!
NBN: hm, I see you're trying to use the internet, I think I'll go down now!
Fucking hell -,-4 -
know what is worst than fucking clients from hell?
fucking websites that need a mortherfucking good spec computer to run. i cannot even type properly. thought my keyboard had problem. no. I can fucking type fucking quick and well here now with no hiccup. i wish i can burn those all down.
no wonder we love devrant. even the website is fast and good.7 -
I bought a new carbon fiber bike (I am into cycling the last two years) and it is fantastic. Lightweight, it feels responsive as hell and really easy to sprint on. BUT, I am fucking sick and I can't ride it to train... All I can do for now is looking at it. FML.13
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Docker swarm. All i want is a 'zero-downtime' system and everytime i try to set it up there's three damn things missing. Load balencer, service updater, and a good distributed storage. I finally got pissed off and am working on those but fuck it's been how fucking long docker has been out why the hell somebody else hasn't done this yet.5
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"Can I have an app? It's a million dollar idea: you take a picture of yourself and it tells you if you're pregnant or just fat. I don't have any money at the moment but I'm willing to give you 5%, maybe less if my friend wants to join. plus, no ads, and make it a free app so it will be liked alot."
Can you shut the fuck up? do you have any idea what the fuck you're talking about? that's the most fucking ridiculous idea I've ever heard. how the hell would it even work?6 -
Ah fucking hell.
I hate it when my boss goes the path of least resistance to implement something.
Of course declaring a class property with the "any" type (TypeScript) is a fucking lot easier than to properly write an interface for it and declare the property with that type.
Thank god I have holidays, otherwise I would hatepunch his fucking monitor. Twice.3 -
When i interviewed, my employer told me that they were fine with me using linux at work. "No problem" they said. Today, the CTO called me into his office and told me not to bring my computer back to the office again, we're a Mac shop.
Guess I'll have to comply, but what the fucking hell?
I hate Macs so, so much.10 -
So it turns out that the iPhone X was one of the most popular christmas gifts this year in Norway. I mean fucking hell, how is that even possible given the price?2
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Fucking tutorials that simply skip thing completely.
Like how the fuck am I supposed to know how to run that that shit when you don't even mention how to build it and jump straight to the fucking debugging section.
Fucking hell, relate yourself to the people who'll read your shit, you non empathetic scum3 -
Fucking hell. When you go to bed sorta early, but can't stop thinking about your latest project for some fucking reason. So you wake up hours later STILL thinking about it, thus you aren't even sure if you slept at all. Doesn't feel like it. What the fuck? Programming, are you my goddamn love interest or what? Anyone knows the feeling?3
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so wait... the recruitment agency just gave me the wrong FUCKING ADDRESS.
THAT JUST FUCKING HAPPENED.
Get your head out your arse, and take a fucking proper look at the appointment details, instead of checking your goddamn phone constantly.
Fucking hell, I'm angry. -
i honestly hate the ap computer science principles curriculum. we're taking an ap test soon, so for the past few weeks, we've been constantly taking practice tests.
it pisses me off so much. the questions, the criteria, it's all bs.
we have questions like "what will reduce the digital divide?" with choices like "education for low income families on computers." like, I DONT FUCKING KNOW.
frankly, I DONT FUCKING CARE. giving electronics to people who cant afford it is great and all, BUT IT DOESNT INVOLVE ANYTHING ABOUT COMPUTING.
HEY, COLLEGE BOARD, KNOWING IF AN ALGORITHM IS TECHNICALLY AN "ABSTRACTION" DOESNT FUCKING MATTER. WHAT MATTERS IS THAT I CAN IDENTIFY WHATS MORE EFFICIENT, WHERE A BUG IS, CONCEPTS INVOLVED IN PROGRAMS, THINGS LIKE THAT.
NOT IF DNS IS SIMILAR IN STRUCTURE TO THE US POSTAL SYSTEM.
god i hope whoever wrote this gets hit in the head by a github server that was dropped from the 2^8th floor.2 -
!dev but it is a fucking rant.
Happy new years fucking 2018 already turning off great with me freezing my fucking balls off cause my heater aint fucking working. Top it off my Damn Hotter Than Hell Water Heater froze and i have no hotwater. Fuck somebody find me that son of a bitch 2018 where i can take it out im the woods and shoot that dickheaded cocksucking asshole.1 -
Fucking hell mates, for me reading the rants is more addictive than fucking 9gag was back in the day :D2
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So fucking tired of priority shifting. How the hell is anyone supposed to get shit done with 500 fucking meetings and between each one you're told do something different?
This is critical you must do it now! No this!
My response, fuck you I'm going home my head hurts let me know what you'd like me to code and when you've decided add a day for annoying me.3 -
I've taken more work than I should... now I'm sitting here on a status call. And it is 21:00 Saturday. And I started at 08:00. And I work at least 10 hours tomorrow. And this lasts for couple of months. And fuck my fucking logic and why the fuck did I allow myself this hell! Fuck!2
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FUCK YOU ACCESS!!! FUCK YOU MICROSOFT!!! FUCK YOU DB PROF FOR FORCING IS TO USE THIS FUCKING PEACE OF CRAPWARE!!!
In the time I spent cursing at Microsofts bullshit I could have done the task twice in MySQL and would already have a nice looking fucking UI for this shit. FUCKING HELL.2 -
Fedora broke my grub, so I tried fixing my grub. Didn't work. Also fucked over my windows bootloader.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK mkay
Getting grub to run again might be easily done but fucking hell im never gonna get that windows booting again. (not that much of a loss tho)4 -
Why the hell does enterprise software get away with not having basic, logical, functionality?!
A hierarchical page structure should allow you to name multiple pages the same as long as they're under different parents.
Every FREE documentation platform understands this, yet atlassian fucking confluence can't figure it out.1 -
Fucking hell with React Naive! Spent all day making a screen and that bitch looked messed up on Android but working as intended on iOS!
I fucking hate that shit hybrid shit apps!5 -
HELL FUCK AND HELL YEAH AT THE SAME FUCKING TIME!
Why? Well... You maybe remember that I Posted a Rant where i said that i Stream EVERY 3D Print i do. And... That I wanted to make an Easter Bunny, that failed... Failed Horribly... and thanks to the Fact im streaming everything i could just REWIND the footage AND FOUND THE ERROR! AND IM SO FUCKING GLAD THAT I DID THIS!
GOOD DOCUMENTATION IS A MUST FOR EVERYTHING!!! DOCUMENT YOUR WHOLE FUCKING LIFE! JUST FUCKING DO IT!3 -
Fuck me. 5 installation attempts later, still can't get arch to boot after removing the live usb. Do I have the wrong fucking kernel, cause it can't find it during boot now. Fucking hell, I just want this shit to run.30
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FUCKING HELL.
It's already enough that this FUCKING API I have to work with is a mess of JSON and XML responses mixed together.
With mixed german and english keys and attributes all sprinkled over it.
And API access locked to Austria only for some reason.
And then they even manage to fuck up the little bit of JSON they use.
It's just a fucking array of strings (where one could easily use integers).
They can stick this fucking steaming pile of shit that they call API up their PHP infested assholes.
I hate web development sometimes.
5 -
FUCKING HELL!
I just shutdown my computer after deciding to leave the unfinished feature that I started a couple hours ago for tomorrow.
Not 5 fucking minuets later I had found a solution in my head but now don’t want to spend the time to turn my computer on to fix it. Ugh1 -
Wow I was playing Dota 2 when Windows decided to minimize it and tell me about the update timing. Almost cost me a game.7
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Fucking hell. I usually really like firefox but today it was a real pain in the ass to download sth. It wold download 99% and then stop. I couldn't stop the download and the file was obviously not working. I had to switch to edge and both the design and the fast download really appealed to me. Ffs firefox!4
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Nothing makes me happier than listening to my neighbor's disgusting banda music playing as loud as it can.
No worries tho, the cops will be here in about 20 mins (it usually is 20) one would have expected that after getting the cops called on you for 3 times already you would get the message:
No homeslice. If i want to listen to that cantina piece of shit music on my fucking friday nights I will make sure to let u know :) but I actually have class so no thank you.
This is why Trump hates us (Mexicans) -
Right, I get that you prefer light theme. Understood it the first time you told me, even though I've never asked you. But why the hell do you feel the urge to whine and whinge about it literally every fucking time you stroll behind me and see my beautiful dark-and-pastel-colored ide?2
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hsctf (high school capture the flag)
Sounds fun
Looks fun
first hurdle: you gotta have a mail server that accepts RFC uncompliant emails
second hurdle: even when you have it the acceptation link won't work
third hurdle: its FUCKING IN PYTHON
FUCKING HELL
If this how you wanna educate your youth, the for gods sake, die -
So I have this "Software Engineering" course of this semester.
According to course curriculum we are supposed to taught "how to develop software for some real life problem".
Fast forward to this day. For FUCKING 8 WEEKS WE ARE GONNA JUST DO DOCUMENTATION(SRS, Problem description, features description etc) AND IMPLEMENT WHOLE PROJECT IN JUST ONE WEEK.
BURN IN HELL YOU FUCKING SHIT PROFESSOR....8 -
Recruiters have gone fucking mad! They are offering me a job in Brussels haha, this is at least a two hour drive away!!
Unless this job comes with a personal helicopter service, hell no!7 -
Fucking dialog box with only one choice... “Stay Connected” what the hell did you even give me this choice for? What if I wanted to log out? Why prompt at all?
3 -
Bloody Fucking Managers !!!!
Few Months Back...
Manager: Innovation we need Innovation.
Me: What's the process?
Manager: You give idea >we give you people > they do all the work !
Cool right ?
Present situation :
I have given them 5-7 ideas. I am programming for all of them. When I ask for help -- we will see... After the programming is done its working. I need make the documents etc. Everyone uses the tools. I get to be the sucker !1 -
Your Thunderbird inbox file is 8GB and you complain about the speed but still, when I fucking ask you if you want me to archive for you the fucking mails, I get a "Hell no, I don't like them archived because then they are difficult to find"... go to fuck off.
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Fucking fuck fuck hell.
My grandfather Bought a 50€ doogee phone.
After one month, it started showing advertizuments randomly.
I installed a firewall, but now it opens a different advertizinc in my Browser every few hours.
WHO THE FUCK THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA?
O AND:one tap root doesnt work9 -
I DON'T GIVE A STINKING RAT'S CUNT ABOUT YOUR FILTHY, FUCKING MOBILE APP, AKA SPYWARE! FUCK THE HELL OFF AND DIE, YOU WORTHLESS PRODUCTS OF INCEST, AND SHOW ME THE GODDAMN WEBSITE IN THE BROWSER!3
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A wholehearted FUCK YOU to the cunt that configured those stupid Ubee routers. Wasted two hours trying to get ssh port forwarding to work, only to realise just now, that it does indeed already work, but somehow I am blocked from accessing my routers IP from within the network... how does that make any sense... >.< fucking hell4
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It's been a year since I first entered the world of development.
Let's see what I have accomplished so far:
Learned:
Java, J2EE, Node.js, Python, Django, Android, Angular, html/css, Rxjs, RxJava, Linux, MySQL, Mongodb, Docker, Heroku, AWS
Projects:
All unfinished.
Job:
Still working in IT security goddammit.
Fucking hell. Why am I so good at learning but shit at working?6 -
Bloody fucking Crystal. Lame fucking excuse for a reporting engine product.
Can’t change data source from API for a report containing List of Values at runtime.
What the actual fuck! A reporting system where I can’t change the data source.
Die in hell you Fucking blood sucking leeches. Die of malaria!2 -
How fucking difficult is it to first figure out what the hell you want me to build, before assigning me a project?
But noo...make me implement a feature that will do a completely different thing in two weeks, and a completely different thing a week after that...fuck you Jeff3 -
I fucking hate DLL mother fucking hell.
And fuck you Microsoft.SqlServer.BatchParser.dll
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Kinda relief?
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.
Nah.. I still got to resolve this issue.5 -
Fucking cocksucker, I shut my macbook down at home, go to college and BAM the FUCKING THING WONT START ANYMORE
LIKE WTF IT HAS BEEN 15 MINUTES BETWEEN WORKING FINE AND NOT WORKING AT ALL FUCKING PIECE OF UTTER SHIT
Now I probably have to reinstall and all that fucking hell,
(ps its en encrypted drive installation so I can log in see the progress bar and then it shuts down)11 -
Be me at work, 12h nights shift, 4th day like that
Following online course on machine learning, instructor says we'll use python 3.x as the interpreter for the project, boot personal laptop and start pycharms, create the file, choose right interpreter no big deal
pip install the modules I need for the course - done, try to import them.
Doesn't work, first reboot, still not working, browsing Internet for answers, no ideas, reboot again (you never know) reload pycharms, browse Internet again, find out the modules only work on python 2.7.
Wasted 45minutes for this shit
Feels good bro.2 -
I adapted RetinaNet (originally published for 2D object detection) to 3D for 3D object detection in CTs.
Guess what, it took me more than 10 days to do this and IT IS FUCKING WORKING!!!
HELL YEAH! -
Fuck the design guidelines that change every fucking day. It makes Front-End an unbearable hell. I'm seriously tired of having to code stupid shit for exceptions exceptions exceptions.5
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Roses are red
Boost I need you
You do so much I cannot breath
You fucking need to be hacked around every time I have to compile you for a different compiler or VS version getyourshittogheter fucking hell it makes me hate you -
I HATE my router
Why the hell did virgin media think it was a good idea to NOT let me port forward ports LESS THAN I’ve already set up
WHO THOUGHT THAT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?!?
Its so fucking annoying, I’ve had to remove all of my set up ports just to add ports with low values too many times AaaAAAaa4 -
Whoever made these fucking AIML libs that are unmaintianed for eons should fucking die.
Seriously, I want to make a fucking AI in AIML in Node.js but I can't because none of them ever fucking works
Jesus fuck you fags should go to hell, get your soul forked by Satan and and rot in despair you impregnated wankflaps1 -
I just learned the concept of this thing called REST API and now here's GraphQL showing up on me face. Mother fucking web development hell. BRB. KMS4
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Yet another thing i think is fucking stupid.. GDPR btw.
So, a guy in Denmark owns a grocery store and has an issue with people stealing from him a lot the last couple of years. He catches them on tape and shares it on social media to try and prevent it.
Im not sure why it didn't work to go to the cops, but it didn't.
What the owner ended up doing, was hang a note on the front of the store so people could see it before they entered, see attached image.
However, now he has been notified what hes doing is illegal, because the "user" doesn't consent clearly enough.
I dont understand GDPR, but if you do, you're probably gonna find mistakes in what i wrote.
Source for story: https://bt.dk/erhverv/...
Its his fucking store, if people steal from him he should be allowed to post it on pornhub if that was his desire.
It's illegal to kill someone, but if you're threatened on your life, you may kill in selfdefense.
To me, those are the same, just one is on a much more serious level of course.
Fuck me.
13 -
You see this fucker? Those are packets sent to Apple, what are those packets? The update of an app I am working on.
Makes me wonder why the fuck does upload disconnect out of a sudden when there is not a single issue in the network I'm connected to!
Apple get your shit together cuz an update process takes more time than developing the damn app!
2 -
It's 17:50.
I've been working in my mates garden all day.
Came in to sit down at about 14:00
His pissy little voice has been droning on about pointless little issues and complaining how stupid the rest of the world is for 4 GODDAMN HOURS.
HES ACTUALLY MAKING ME WANT TO BREAK HIS FUCKING NECK. -
So I've started working on my own theme for gnome and after 1 hour I can safely say this... I have no fucking idea what the hell I'm doing! :-)5
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Reading book about sapiens history. It turned out we are slaved by wheat. Fucking plant conquered this world using humans as a tool. Fuck You wheat then, burn in hell.8
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Fucking hell! Finally I found a good solution for a problem I never knew how to solve it in a beautiful way. For everybody interested: c++20 provides functionality for synchronously writing to a stream from multiple threads.
Link: http://en.cppreference.com/w/cpp/...4 -
Why the fucking hell does Asus uefi lack the ability to select an EFI file to boot from? Why does it have to be so fucking complicated?4
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"Windows Update logs are now generated using ETW (Event Tracing for Windows).
Please run the Get-WindowsUpdateLog PowerShell command to convert ETW traces into a readable WindowsUpdate.log."
WHAT THE FUCKING HELL IS WRONG WITH THE TURDS THAT COME UP WITH THIS FUCKING BULLSHIT!!!!
And now, .....
NOTHING WORKS - THE FIXES DON'T WORK, THE TOOLS THAT REPAIR THE SYSTEM DON'T WORK, THE LOGS ARE HIDDEN AND OBFUSCATED, AND THEY ADD PROCEDURE ON TOP OF PROCEDURE.
I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHY THE FUCKING UPDATE DOESN'T FUCKING WORK!!!!!
3 FUCKING HOURS I'VE LOST ON THIS. THREE FUCKING HOURS!!!!!!!
And now, the fucking WMI data service is not available.
HOW THE FUCK DO I FIX THIS, AND HOW IS THE FUCKING INSTALLATION EVEN FUCKING WORKING WITH SO MANY BROKEN BITS?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?
19 -
For fuck's sake, why do so many engineering professors use Comic Sans in their power points and documents?!? These are incredibly intelligent people, so how can they be so ignorant? We all have to suffer as a result... Honestly, has nobody ever had the balls to tell them to change their fucking font because it is ugly as sin, hurts the eyes, and is super childish? Fuck all those people who insist on using Comic Sans. You all deserve to spend time burning in hell for your cruelty. Better yet - sir who invented Comic Sans: go fuck yourself and burn in hell.9
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Following this rant\story:
https://devrant.com/rants/1305438/...
I've finally found a job that I like both from the compensation point of view and the job itself 😁🎉
Can't be more happy.2 -
!rant; story(well, kinda)
I made it! Hell fucking fuck yeah! I made it, I made it, I made it! I passed all exams! See you in Prague, at ČVUT!(those who happen to study/live there or nearby)
life.setStatus("Winning!");3 -
Does anyone have problems with Android instant run?
Fucking hell, I spent one hour yesterday debugging an error, until I noticed that the code in the APK wasn't updated, because it was sending an error of a non-existent line.
Sometimes it works okay, but damn...2 -
Fucking hell. I must do some debugging to myself. Got into a habit of falling asleep right after 9,930 since the start of Dec 😫
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Dear Webdevs who are able to use bootstrap and CSS properly. I appreciate ur work but hell fucking shitfuck I can't get my mind about it to work. FUCK this piece of container loving table ruining and not aligneable dump4
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What the hell is heppening for all these companies, that is storing plain text passwords. I am fucking scared of the amount. A danish Company was just hacked, and All their passwords was stored in plain text. Who are the morons who built these systems even a fucking toddler should know storing passwords as plain text is wrong -.- 😔😬😡😠2
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Decided to look at Firebase tonight, to see what's what. Before accessing the demo project, it promoted me to review the Terms of Service. I obliged.
...holy fucking shit, dude.
1 -
Can't create a new SQL database on Azure on on one subscription as every region is unavailable. Everything works on my other subscription.
Fucking hell.1 -
Fucking docker swarm. Why the hell do they have to change the way it works so damn often. Find a good workthough and its not fucking valid anymore cause swarm doesnt use consul to catalog swarm nodes anymore. Well fuck thanks docker now i have to rethink my architecture cause you fuckers wanted to do something half assed.
Sad fucking thing is the change that made you do that shit in the first place doesn't work right for ssl so your damn mesh network is fucking useless for any real world uses unless people like me rig the fucking hell out off it.
Another fucking thing how the hell haven't these fucktards added a shared storage yet, come the fuck on. -
WTF Is wrong with Kotlin! Every fucking time I upgrade its Android Studio plugin i receive loads of errors about: Type mismatch: inferred type is FragmentActivity? but FragmentActivity was expected
for fucks sake bitch! Why the hell you keep on switching from optional to non optional on every fucking update, my commit history is full of this type of fixes -_-7 -
Been reading about this mess called C# 8.... WHY THE FUCKING HELL DO YOU THINK ALLOWING FUCKING INTERFACES TO HAVE DEFAULT METHOD IMPLEMENTATIONS IS A FUCKING GOOD IDEA?
Just Can't wrap my head around this stupid idea... Help me out here fellas...5 -
Motherfucking windows 10 upgrades. Fucking hell no! They added that piece of shit that they sell as a browser again. Edge? More fucking end me. And why the fuck that shit have all permissions my default. Even those I don't want the OS to have.
But what's even worse...
THE FUCKING MOUSEPAD DRIVER DOESN'T SUPPORT MULTITOUCH AGAIN
I wish I had the time to finally configure get away Form these micro$uckers.
3 -
FML. I have to draw system diagram at 12:00 am and the worst part is I don't even have an app that does that so I need to use my Design app to draw this shit full DIY style. This is not my fucking job fuck you...
I wish my project lead go hell and fucking Satan puts his dick in his ass. MotherFucker then you will understand my pain ASSHOLES3 -
it FUCKING annoys me like hell that in the year of 2017 powershell cannot display more than 16 colors and output unicode symbols properly!
i mean.. fuck that shit!4 -
Fucking hell I hate VMs. The joy of fast-starting, lightweight containers is mind-blowing when you have to deal (again) with a vagrant-setup that takes like forever to start... ARGHS3
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Hey this is my first post on This new fitness-tracker-app community
I will tell y'all my workout :)
-programming a parser
FUCKING HELL PLEASE STOP ALREADY THIS IS THE WORST SHIT IVE EVER DONE EVERY WHERE IF STATEMENTS JUST TO CONSUME FOUR FUCKING TOKENS I DONT WANT TO DIE BUT I'D LIKE THIS PROJECT TO BE FINISHED ALREADY BECAUSE THIS IS ANNOYING AS FUCK I REALLY WANT TO KICK MY COMPUTER WHILE TELLING IT TO BE THE MOST STUPID BRAIN ON THE WORD AND THEN REMEMBERING THAT ITS NOT A BRAIN FUCK MY FUCKING FUCK HELL THEN I WOULD KILL THE PEOPLE WHO THOUGHT THAT MAKEING std::vector::end() RETURN AN ITERATOR WITHOUT ELEMENT WAS FINE AND THEN I'D KILL ALL THOSE WHO COME INTO MY ROOM THUS DISTURBING MY WORKFLOW
Enough rage.4 -
This shitty indian development companies should fucking go to hell. So there is a client who approaches me so that I can add new integrations to their web store/platform but the guys who development it wouldn't let me access the backend in any way!!!
Guess I am so mad that I can't even rant well.
But fuck you cheap indian development companies!!!!!!7 -
What the hell is going on Microsoft?!?!?
1)Fucking Windows Updates Out of Control
2)We've become Microsoft's testers
And finally, the thing that really frustrated me today:
Yesterday VS was working fine. Today:
99% CPU Usage In Idle
IDE hangs on every 3 symbols(hanged twice while writing 'string')1 -
Fucking hell the AWS IAM documentation is confusing as fuck. Trying to set up a fucking role is harder than cutting a rock with a fucking spoon.
And who the fuck thought it would be a good idea to allow a CLI user to run any command he's allowed to without any form of authentication??
Oh, set up MFA for the CLI you say? Good fucking luck with that, if you ever manage to figure out how to set that shit up!
Fuck this shit!2 -
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
It's 4AM in the morning I and after a pleasent past 4 days, I woke up to this piece of fucked up forced feed shit.. me whole PC is stuck in boot and makes no noise after Windows forced fucked me on every single I/O with their shit piece of orgy:ed up excuse of an update.... Dear good.. this is the best fucking start of a week..... ಠ╭╮ಠ
So fucking done with this pile of bukkake.. Ubuntu, take me in!!3 -
Oh good, I get to clean up somebody's else shit because we have to deploy it in a fucking hour. Why the hell did we have our fresh junior do it then?
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Love it when there's only one SO question relating to the problem you have, there is no answer, a couple comments, and the person asking updates it saying he figured it out, WITHOUT GIVING ANY INDICATION AS TO WHAT THE SOLUTION IS.
Fucking hell, doesn't happen often, but when it does... 👿 -
I'm contributing to a project that allows you to control your Linux desktop from your phone. I managed to implement controlling your PCs volume form the phone. At first the code was ugly as hell, include a fucking long bash statement, but I even managed to turn it into a nice solution.
A few weeks later I was invited to meet the core developers. -
That feeling when you, after a day of struggeling with that fucking front-end shit that is CSS and the alignment hell it brings, stumble upon a post about flexbox...2
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Why in the fucking hell do people keep thinking that swapping their stations and printers around is a good idea? This is the 3rd time this month that this store has pulled this crap. More so is they decide to so it during their dinner rush which is always fun to fix
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If you want a laugh, take a look at the source code on indeed.co.uk https://indeed.co.uk Its a mixture of shit tables nested in divs, absolute positioning. its shocking. They are a big recruitment site in the UK.
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Am I the problem or is it actually fucking tedious to install all gems some ruby-gem is dependant on? Fucking hell, i just want to use that shit and now i'm installing dependency after dependency...5
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just a quick rant to express my HATRED towards java.
Today I played minecraft a bit to release some stree (plis dont tell anybody xD)
FUCKING HELL
1) Java boasts with its portability. Except it doesnt even have a proper runtime for linux
2) ITS SUPER SLOW
3) FAHCKING HELL it's so broken when you start with custom hardware (might be the fault of Gl tho)
^^ those points dont list the horrors of coding in it. I have already accomplished some coding challenges in it, and I know it to be an epitome of misery15 -
Fucking hell... If I knew that PHPStorm could display the same file over 2 screens/windows, I’d have used it sooner. 😡
It is a godsend though 🙂7 -
The deepest, darkest place in hell is reserved to the people who wrote the Drupal documentation.
Fucking cms hell. -
The importance of a pre-internet brain is grossly under rated by today's society. One day there be no one left on earth with first hand knowledge of what it was like to not have the web... and that fucking scares the hell out of me!!2
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I FIGURED IT OUT! PAYPAL EXPRESS CHECKOUT NOW RESIDES UNDER BY REIGN. HAIL ME I'M A FUCKING GENIUS FUCK YE I LOVE PAYPAL HELL THE FUCK YEAH! fuck carrots though
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Fuuuuck!!! Why in the godamn hell I get so slow when developing with rails?!?!?!
It took me more than this day to finish a simple form in only front-fucking-end
Damn!!!!!2 -
A friend and me are developing an internet browser using Cefsharp (for practice and for fun). Asked him if he wanted to upload the source code on GitHub.
He said: "No, why would we do that, it's our work"
Oh well, time to find a new coding partner/friend.(jk he's great)
But fucking hell man, he legit hates making his projects open source..6 -
I fucking hate the black matte finish!
I mean, it's nice and elegant, but for things that will be used, it sucks, they get this ugly glossy wear that makes them look dirty.
Do you guys have a laptop with this issue? Does it annoys you?6 -
My computer seems to get more ane more trouble to handle the React part of my project, 16go ram doesn't seem enough to keep the project's reload fluid. (Actually had to hard reboot the computer a few minutes ago because of total freeze)
I don't know if this is because of Material-UI, the project being to big or me not having done something, even though I have my suspicions about MUI. I had to switch to Visual Studio Code (really nice IDE once the basic plugins are installed btw), but dude seems to have hard times too.
Is there a limit to how big a React handled project should be? Am I fucking something up?10 -
Someone can fucking explain why exists language like groovy?!?! It's the fucking same language of Java, only with few extra features! Why the hell I have to choose groovy over java?3
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Ok, which datacenter do I have to set fire to, in order to stop these FUCKING PROMOTIONAL SMS MESSAGES THAT I KEEP GETTING FROM MY FUCKING PHONE OPERATOR??
NOW I'M GETTING PUSH MESSAGES TOO?!? BURN IN HELL YOU FUCKING FUCKS!
I WILL BUILD A FUCKING ARSENAL OF FUCKING ROCKETS AND I'LL SHOVE THEM UP YOUR SHITTY ASS AND BLOW YOU UP IN SO MANY PIECES THAT EVEN AVOGADRO WON'T BE ABLE TO COUNT HOW MANY WILL BE LEFT OF YOU.
AND SPOILER ALERT: I ALREADY KNOW HOW TO BUILD ROCKETS, SO YOU BETTER START RUNNING8 -
Guys, i just want you to know what i feel right now. I have discovered a project that itself is a fucking crutch.
So I was assigned to a new project recently. And it's just FUCKING hell.
I want to burn this fucking thing down, I want to kill everyone who was responsible for this shit.
So it's a web app. It's a website. That is generated in the fucking PL/SQL. IN THE FUCKING PL SQL YOU MAKE PAGES AND NOT ON HTML OH NO NO NO, SON, YOU WRITE EM ON FUCKING XML THAT IS THEN GETTING CONVERTED TO THE FUCKING HTML, AGAIN IN PL SQL, AND AFTER THAT IS SHOWN IN YOUR WEB BROWSER. WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK CUNT
i won't even go deeper into the details, because as you can imagine, the deeper you go, the shittier it fucking gets.5 -
Only half dev-related but AAAAARRRGGGGHH it sure as hell is a rant.
Doing a programming course, and I'm supposed to provide flowcharts of the code. I just spent over TWO FUCKING HOURS working on one in LibreOffice Writer, saving in between to make sure it didn't mess up. But of-FUCKING-course as soon as I do the final goddamn save for the chart, it just magically disappears. My hate for word editors burns with the intensity of all the fires of hell, and almost even rivals my hate for M$...2 -
When you havent pushed in ages and have to tediously 'git status' followed by 'git diff <every fucking file>' to figure out what the hell you've even been doing since the last push and can maybe figure out another commit message than "Various bugfixes"
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FUCK SENCHA WHY THE FUCKING FUCK WOULD YOUR FUCKING MODELS APPEND SUB ARRAYS ONTO ITS PARENT WHAT THE FUCKING HELL IS FUCKING WRONG WITH YOU.
STARTING A PETITION TO PUNT ALL THE SENCHA CREATORS TO THE SOUTH FUCKING POLE. -
Currently on a project to use AI as music recommending model, an interactive AI model generator and researching on Distributed Systems altogether in three different teams for each thing...
Seems I'm the dirty fish of their team.. 😖
Fucking wasting the time all along the day...
Like Why the Fuck am I degrading my own potential, quality and what not...
Oh god Fucking pick me to the hell NOWWW -
!developer_rant
Ok, so my pc is on it's way out (Cries in the corner) so i thought i would just bite the bullet and buy my new system, comes to around $1800 AUD without the GPU which i already have... So i decided I would use zipmoney as i prefer to pay by month (yes i know it costs a little bit each month) but... My application got declined for a $2000 account... So you are telling me i was able to apply for a bank loan last year for $4000 and get approved, get approved to rent a house... I have a perfect credit rating but apparently i dont qualify for a simple loan because i dont earn enough... I'm earning almost double what i was when I applied for a fucking bank loan!5 -
Fucking translation service!! (Wordreference)
This morning I got the usual gdpr thingy and I thought "ok let's have a look what this translation service is doing"
You damn bitch that fucking list contains dozens and dozens of rows and I have to fucking manually disable them one by one.
What the hell, did you hire a monkey to code this stuff you utterly incompetent company? I'm never gonna you this thing again
5 -
Why the hell Medium ended support for embedding profile feeds into external websites? I'm here trying to find a workaround, reverse-engineering Medium's JSON responses (obv no docs for a deprecated feature) and feeling so fucking stupid.
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Fuck JSF! Like seriously! And fuck my internet technologies prof for making us code this horseshit on fucking paper in the goddamn examn! Seriously go fuck yourself and your medieval technologies with a rusty Russian submarine! FUCKING HELL!
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