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AboutLook at you checking me out!
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SkillsPHP, Laravel, Express JS, Docker, HTML, CSS
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LocationHowrah, West Bengal, India
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Website
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Github
Joined devRant on 9/21/2019
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I've made the json protocol. It's a protocol containing only json. No http or anything.
To parse an json object from a stream, you need a function that returns the length of the first object/array of all your received data. The result of that function is to get the right chunk of the json to deserialize.
For such function, json needs to be parsed, so I wrote that function in C to be used with my C server and Python client. I finally implemented a C function into python function that has a real benefit / use case. Else you had to validate but by bit by the python json parser and that's slow while streaming. Some messages are quite big.
Advantage of this protocol is that it's full duplex.
I'm very happy!42 -
Happy Diwali people 😤
Ive to work on my should've-been-a-day-off coz big meeting so y'all better celebrate in my stead 😤😤😤 -
Managers gettin horny when they realize that AI doesn't even need a free pizza party once a year to stay motivated7
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My evening: going from 8e-5 seconds to 1.4e-5 seconds.
I'm pretty happy. I'm now 3x faster than the next fastest library available.19 -
I feel like we should start trolling the spammers. They're sending us their contact details after all...2
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"You gave us bad code! We ran it and now production is DOWN! Join this bridgeline now and help us fix this!"
So, as the author of the code in question, I join the bridge... And what happens next, I will simply never forget.
First, a little backstory... Another team within our company needed some vendor client software installed and maintained across the enterprise. Multiple OSes (Linux, AIX, Solaris, HPUX, etc.), so packaging and consistent update methods were a a challenge. I wrote an entire set of utilities to install, update and generally maintain the software; intending all the time that this other team would eventually own the process and code. With this in mind, I wrote extensive documentation, and conducted a formal turnover / training season with the other team.
So, fast forward to when the other team now owns my code, has been trained on how to use it, including (perhaps most importantly) how to send out updates when the vendor released upgrades to the agent software.
Now, this other team had the responsibility of releasing their first update since I gave them the process. Very simple upgrade process, already fully automated. What could have gone so horribly wrong? Did something the vendor supplied break their client?
I asked for the log files from the upgrade process. They sent them, and they looked... wrong. Very, very wrong.
Did you run the code I gave you to do this update?
"Yes, your code is broken - fix it! Production is down! Rabble, rabble, rabble!"
So, I go into our code management tool and review the _actual_ script they ran. Sure enough, it is my code... But something is very wrong.
More than 2/3rds of my code... has been commented out. The code is "there"... but has been commented out so it is not being executed. WT-actual-F?!
I question this on the bridge line. Silence. I insist someone explain what is going on. Is this a joke? Is this some kind of work version of candid camera?
Finally someone breaks the silence and explains.
And this, my friends, is the part I will never forget.
"We wanted to look through your code before we ran the update. When we looked at it, there was some stuff we didn't understand, so we commented that stuff out."
You... you didn't... understand... my some of the code... so you... you didn't ask me about it... you didn't try to actually figure out what it did... you... commented it OUT?!
"Right, we figured it was better to only run the parts we understood... But now we ran it and everything is broken and you need to fix your code."
I cannot repeat the things I said next, even here on devRant. Let's just say that call did not go well.
So, lesson learned? If you don't know what some code does? Just comment that shit out. Then blame the original author when it doesn't work.
You just cannot make this kind of stuff up.105 -
!rant
After over 20 years as a Software Engineer, Architect, and Manager, I want to pass along some unsolicited advice to junior developers either because I grew through it, or I've had to deal with developers who behaved poorly:
1) Your ego will hurt you FAR more than your junior coding skills. Nobody expects you to be the best early in your career, so don't act like you are.
2) Working independently is a must. It's okay to ask questions, but ask sparingly. Remember, mid and senior level guys need to focus just as much as you do, so before interrupting them, exhaust your resources (Google, Stack Overflow, books, etc..)
3) Working code != good code. You are an author. Write your code so that it can be read. Accept criticism that may seem trivial such as renaming a variable or method. If someone is suggesting it, it's because they didn't know what it did without further investigation.
4) Ask for peer reviews and LISTEN to the critique. Even after 20+ years, I send my code to more junior developers and often get good corrections sent back. (remember the ego thing from tip #1?) Even if they have no critiques for me, sometimes they will see a technique I used and learn from that. Peer reviews are win-win-win.
5) When in doubt, do NOT BS your way out. Refer to someone who knows, or offer to get back to them. Often times, persons other than engineers will take what you said as gospel. If that later turns out to be wrong, a bunch of people will have to get involved to clean up the expectations.
6) Slow down in order to speed up. Always start a task by thinking about the very high level use cases, then slowly work through your logic to achieve that. Rushing to complete, even for senior engineers, usually means less-than-ideal code that somebody will have to maintain.
7) Write documentation, always! Even if your company doesn't take documentation seriously, other engineers will remember how well documented your code is, and they will appreciate you for it/think of you next time that sweet job opens up.
8) Good code is important, but good impressions are better. I have code that is the most embarrassing crap ever still in production to this day. People don't think of me as "that shitty developer who wrote that ugly ass code that one time a decade ago," They think of me as "that developer who was fun to work with and busted his ass." Because of that, I've never been unemployed for more than a day. It's critical to have a good network and good references.
9) Don't shy away from the unknown. It's easy to hope somebody else picks up that task that you don't understand, but you wont learn it if they do. The daunting, unknown tasks are the most rewarding to complete (and trust me, other devs will notice.)
10) Learning is up to you. I can't tell you the number of engineers I passed on hiring because their answer to what they know about PHP7 was: "Nothing. I haven't learned it yet because my current company is still using PHP5." This is YOUR craft. It's not up to your employer to keep you relevant in the job market, it's up to YOU. You don't always need to be a pro at the latest and greatest, but at least read the changelog. Stay abreast of current technology, security threats, etc...
These are just a few quick tips from my experience. Others may chime in with theirs, and some may dispute mine. I wish you all fruitful careers!221 -
A young guy I work with burst into tears today, I had no idea what happened so I tried to comfort him and ask what was up.
It appears his main client had gone nuts with him because they wanted him to make an internet toolbar (think Ask.com) and he politely informed them toolbars doesn't really exist anymore and it wouldn't work on things like modern browsers or mobile devices.
Being given a polite but honest opinion was obviously something the client wasn't used to and knowing the guy was a young and fairly inexperienced, they started throwing very personal insults and asking him exactly what he knows about things (a lot more than them).
So being the big, bold, handsome senior developer I am, I immediately phoned the client back and told them to either come speak to me face-to-face and apologise to him in person or we'd terminate there contract with immediate effect. They're coming down tomorrow...
So part my rant, part a rant on behalf of a young developer who did nothing wrong and was treated like shit, I think we've all been there.
We'll see how this goes! Who the hell wants a toolbar anyway?!401 -
You wanna know what my problem with chatgpt is? It's that it cannot form a FUCKING OPINION.
I have a few guesses on how that can be sorted, but peeps who are already afraid of AI will freak the fuck out when it starts saying "in my opinion..." LOL.
Also, did they ban the thing from making predictions? Like, simple probability. It can't do. 🫤40 -
Changed home wifi password to "Don't ask me shit"
and my dad asked for the password for his new device
guess how it ended
😂🤣5 -
So apparently I own land in dubai. Like three separate mortgages based on the email I received.
Your request (Mortgage Registration)
with request number xxxxx / 2024
has been completed
and you can print your issued certificate from this [link]
I've stripped out the numbers and link.
After confirming it was safe I followed through on a old spare cellphone, and yep, I own three mortgages for properties in dubai.
Except obviously I don't.
Someone used my name, an american, to register mortgages in dubai. *Nice* properties according to the pictures.
What started out as a scam email, or what looked like a scam email, went to an actual government of dubai website, with real mortgage registrations.
How in the fuck does that happen?
The only thing I can think of is someone committed identity fraud, and/or an alphabet agency went through the list of known political dissidents, set up a bullshit mortgage in a questionable territory, and are now using that as a pretext to monitor 'extremists with foreign ties.'
All that for some guy on the west coast that hasn't attended a political rally in his entire life.
Must have been that sign I held at sixteen years old by the side of the road that said "bush lied us into a war, and people died."
or maybe it was that time I told a really enthusiastic obama supporting police officer that it amazed me obama had time to win the nobel peace prize what with all the bombings he carried out against foreign civilians.8 -
yesterday i was jogging on the street. 3 random whores (women) were walking towards me, side by side, took the entire fucking pavement, not giving a fuck to move over so i can fucking pass. i am NOT going to step aside so some WHORES could walk. im on a fucking mission. im jogging doing cardio. fuck YOU. so i didnt move a fucking inch. i jogged and they walked. as we intersected i SLAMMED a fucking whore with my shoulder, to her shoulder, 3rd newtons law, we hit each other because the fucking WHORE does not have brain cells to figure out she NEEDS TO MOVE THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME AS A MAN. FUCK OFF. then they turned around and looked at me as if its MY fault. NO, you FUCKING WHORE. it is YOUR fault. FUCK these fucking today's women all of them are FUCKING brainless and whores who got nothing to offer but a piece of used pussy (except @jestdotty she cool and not a whore)9
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Our PM wanted us to do a massive refactor of our Codebase. He gave it 1 Story Point ( or in his words :"Small T-Shirt size") since it was just a refactor, what could Go wrong ?
Answer: Everything . WE needed 2 Months to get Everything up to standart (how he saw it) and 2 of the programmers just quit because they were getting yelled at for Not refactoring fast enough9 -
Today was not my sharpest day but managed to sit eight hours on this chair with a laptop on my arm leaning. It's very comfortable.
I made a regex interpreter. Three versions, the first one was nicely programmed and functional but found out that it was 16 times slower than the clib one (at least!). Then i found out how extremely fast the clib one was and found out that the compiling to bytecode what they do is extremely effective. So, i've wrote my one bytecode compiler that is faster than theirs. So, the second version was born. After abusing that thing to find out what kinda speeds i could get out of it, it became very unmaintainable, beyond resque. So i made third version, this one is very performant. It supports [abc]{3} (three times dupplicating group) for example. It supports 0-9 and a-z that converts to 'd' and 'a' (shorter for speed). It converts [a0-9a-z]]{3} to [lada][lada][lada]. The bytecode is not smaller many times than source, but not having to think, suits the interpreter very well. It's blazing fast.
I wish I could smth like this for a living. Develop a language for a living or socket servers. Tired of python (great language, but boring).
Thanks for listening to my tedtalk6 -
We live in the world where “At least I’m not a pedophile” is a genuine PR strategy. If you’re kinda famous, all you have to do is clear the lowest bar imaginable.3
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Seing Jest accuse someone of mainsplaining while being probably the biggest "womansplainer" on the platform is the funniest shit ever.8
