CS Professor: “What M word is the black hole to all productivity?”

Student: “Management”

CS Professor: “Was going to say meetings but that’s better”

They just bought 2 fucking 23" extra monitors for every developer in my org.
FEELS GOOD MAN

We just spent 30 minutes standing around watching Elon Musk launch his car into orbit.

I love working in IT.

How about stop reading devRant every 5 minutes?

I will type up my rant tomorrow, okay?

Got 5 minutes please?

Productivity level 10000...

How to decrease productivity of half of the globe in just 3 words:
Stackoverflow is offline

>we increased new releases to once a day
> wow, how'd you do that?
> fired the QA team

Credit - @iamdevloper✓

*loud thud*

That was my productivity falling out a window. I just found a shit load of bubble wrap lying around!

Safe to say, productivity efficiently ruined.

A blue screen a day,
keeps the productivity away!!

FUCK!!!

Sometimes wearing headphones isn't enough

My productivity hack: headphones and a simple sign that says "NO".
...works!

My estimations before devRant:
PM: how long will it take to implement this?
Me: one day, tops.

My estimations after devRant:
PM: how long will it take to implement this?
Me: one week, tops.

Thanks @dfox for making me so productive.

I code through the night until 8 am, then sleep until 6pm+.
My family then calls me out as being unproductive and lazy.
Why must the whole world be oriented against night owls like me? 😥

Stack Overflow - Hot Network Questions

killing productivity since 2008

FUCK THIS! FUUUUCKKKKKK THIIIS!... one would be fucking excited and motivated to finish work, but your entire fucking productivity is hanging from the internet connection's dick!!!!.. Fuckin ISP mother fucker! FUCK!... i can't fuckin work under these conditions for fuck's sake! SHIT!

The time has come
I need to use this app to be productive again

5 screens... 3 monitors, main screen, app connecting my iPad Pro screen. now I can be productive and distracted without having to change tabs...

I can not function today in my hot office (no AC). I'm just reading rants in JSON format to look like I'm working. I may need a USB Desk Fan to improve my productivity. Anybody have recommendations?

Real wannaCry is when your mouse wheel dies and you can't afford a new mouse until next month.

I wrote a database migration to add a column to a table and populated that column upon record creation.
But the code is so freaking convoluted that it took me four days of clawing my eyes out to manage this.
BUT IT'S FINALLY DONE.
FREAKING YAY.

Why so long, you ask? Just how convoluted could this possibly be? Follow my lead ~

There's an API to create a gift. (Possibly more; I have no bloody clue.)
I needed the mobile dev contractor to tell me which APIs he uses because there are lots of unused ones, and no reasoning to their naming, nor comments telling me what they do.

This API takes the supplied gift params, cherry-picks a few bits of useful data out (by passing both hashes by reference to several methods), replaces a couple of them with lookups / class instances (more pass-by-reference nonsense). After all of this, it logs the resulting (and very different) mess, and happily declares it the original supplied params. Utterly useless for basically everything, and so very wrong.

It then uses this data to call GiftSale#create, which returns an instance of GiftSale (that's actually a Gift; more on that soon).

GiftSale inherits from Gift, and redefines three of its methods.

GiftSale#create performs a lot of validations / data massaging, some by reference, some not. It uses `super` to call Gift#create which actually maps to the constructor Gift#initialize.

Gift#initialize calls Gift#pre_init (passing the data by reference again), which does nothing and returns null. But remember: GiftSale inherits from Gift, meaning GiftSale#pre_init supersedes Gift#pre_init, so that one is called instead. GiftSale#pre_init returns a Stripe charge object upon success, or a Gift (and a log entry containing '500 Internal') upon failure. But this is irrelevant because the return value is never actually used. Pass by reference, remember? I didn't.

We're now back at Gift#initialize, Rails finally creates a Gift object using the args modified [mostly] in-place by all of the above.

Another step back and we're at GiftSale#create again. This method returns either the shiny new Gift object or an error string (???), and the API logic branches on its type. For further confusion: not all of the method's returns are explicit, and those implicit return values are nested three levels deep. (In Ruby, a method will return the last executed line's return value automatically, allowing e.g. `def add(a,b); a+b; end`)

So, to summarize: GiftSale#create jumps back and forth between Gift five times before finally creating a Gift instance, and each jump further modifies the supplied params in-place.

Also. There are no rescue/catch blocks, meaning any issue with any of the above results in a 500. (A real 500, not a fake 500 like last time. A real 500, with tragic consequences.)

If you're having trouble following the above... yep! That's why it took FOUR FREAKING DAYS! I had no tests, no documentation, no already-built way of testing the API, and no idea what data to send it. especially considering it requires data from Stripe. It also requires an active session token + user data, and I likewise had no login API tests, documentation, logging, no idea how to create a user ... fucking hell, it's a mess.)

Also, and quite confusingly:
There's a class for GiftSale, but there's no table for it.
Gift and GiftSale are completely interchangeable except for their #create methods.

So, why does GiftSale exist?
I have no bloody idea.
All it seems to do is make everything far more complicated than it needs to be.

Anyway. My total commit?
Six lines.
IN FOUR FUCKING DAYS!

AHSKJGHALSKHGLKAHDSGJKASGH.

I wrote an app that tells me if a lottery ticket is winning. It takes a picture of the ticket, does OCR, finds the number lines and compares them with a remote json.
I live next door to a lottery shop.

I measure my productivity each day by looking at my battery % when I get off work

While(devRanting)
{
productivity--;
}

Why am I always most productive right before end of work day? :/

Finally able to fully use Intellij without a mouse :)

Started to take vitamins. Oversleeping is gone, constant fatigue is gone, and I also feel happy for no reason.

Best experience: Downloading devRant
Worst experience: Being on devRant for so long it's making my productivity go down. 😑

So, as the lead UX/UI designer, I was working with the marketing officer on the new e-mail template of the company. It took us at least one week to get a good settle – 'cause, you know, she's so skilled on that – doing back and forth and arguing on every detail.

Then she sent me a PPT file with the content and wording for each kind of e-mail.
After 3 days of work, I finished implementing the template and pushed the project in production.

~3 months later
MO: How's your work going on the template?
Me: Erm, sorry? You mean, the e-mails?
MO: Yes! Can you show me the result?
Me: Well, the result is online for...like...3 months?
*Surprised* MO: Hum, yeah? But I didn't validate it!
*Wince* Me: Well, yes, you did, we worked together on it and we finally found a nice settle.
MO: Yes, but the content? Can you send me one of each kind so I can double-check?
Me: ...
*to the rescue* CEO (and husband of MO): It's OK, I've already validate them.
MO: Oh, ok. But I want to double-check. I'll do it later, ok.

~3 weeks later
MO: Can you tell me how I can receive the registration e-mail?
Me: ...
*to the rescue, joking* CTO: Well, did you try to turn your computer off and on again?
MO: Oh, you really think this will work? Let me save my work first!
Me: *BOOOOM*

TL;DR: The marketing officer of my company does nothing productive and is making the company losing a lot of money, but she also make me lose my time for bullshits.
At least I can laugh about it on devRant.

Discovered Mr. Robot. Productivty went like 📉 💥

How to increase productivity 😀

I wish I could learn Machine Learning. Automate my work and blame the machine for missing deadline.

There needs to be an IDE that can predict what stackoverflow question I'm gonna lookup

When I was working in a park near Seattle where I didn't find productivity to be a battle...

For some reason my productivity skyrockets at night

Company grows a 30% and internet starts getting slow.
Solution from company: Block half of common websites

Goodbye productivity, hello Zelda!!

To save server cost and developers' productivity, devRant should have an intentional downtime of 3 to 6 hours daily :3

Coffee. No other tool does as much for my productivity.

Every damn day

It's amazing how much you can do only in 1-2 hours. Somehow I was in full productive mode and I swear I completed tasks that would normally take a week because of how lazy I am normally.

Companies that measure productivity with lines of code written.

I wrote a 50 lines of CSS today.

So productive.

Since I bought a label printer my productivity went down alot.

"As you can see, our open-office floor plan really helps with developer productivity"

So I wanted to have a productive coding day, but I failed due to getting lost trying to write a Sublime Text plugin that would improve my productivity.

Me trying to be productive on weekdays,

Btw, it’s only 3 links away from Reddit to Sushi in wikipedia,

The louder you type, the more productive you look.

You know you're productive when your coffee turns cold before you finish it.

Number of screens is directly proportional to Productivity.

I'd say VIM, but I end up spending the day customizing my .vimrc file instead of actual productivity.

Found this on reddit, sad but true

!rant

If you haven't checked it out yet, all devs need Devdocs.io + Station

Hands down the most useful resources I've ever come across.

This one site and tool saves me so many chrome tabs it's worth its weight in gold.

Combined with Station (getstation.com) I've cut my RAM usage down by 1/3 overall.

When you have PS CC2018 and Visual Studio 2017 running on a netbook it's helpful to squeeze every little bit.

I always find it more productive to have at least two ongoing projects at once.

That way, if I get stuck on a bug/frustrated with the first project, I focus on the second and more often than not, when I go back to the first project I realize that I had made a dumb mistake and keep going.

Everyday single day I have to give time for family, personal work and office. Prioritized in that order.

End result : low quality family time, pending personal projects. Office work - well that one is OK I guess cos the time is dedicated.

Solution : made a deal with wife - one day on weekend dedicated for family (she can plan anything she wants) and I will not do any work. Other day dedicated for my personal work/time (no family plans).
Divide weekdays similarly. On family days I checkout at sharp 4pm from office and come home straight spend the rest of the day with family alone. On the other days I stay either at office or go somewhere to work or hangout with dev buddies.
*Wife agrees*

End result: Quality family time. No interruption when coding (a dev would understand the importance of this). More productive work.

productivity like

Bought a smart TV just for stackoverflow, gonna boost productivity this time!

"Meetings are known as the place where productivity goes to die."

Quality takes time.

Forgot my headphones today. Productivity is gonna plummet.

Settings > Join the dark side.
Thank me later

oh no, I broke our coffee machine. There goes productivity....

Mojang released the minecraft official launcher for Gnu/linux, and they fucking have an Arch package! That’s right motherfuckers: AN ARCH PACKAGE!

One of a developer's worst nightmare:

their headphones that they use in work is broken/doesn't work

Me: Right, time to sit down and write some code.

Also me: I think I need to try a new IDE to see if that makes me more productive.

Productivity tools are my own productivity anti-pattern...!

Productivity struggles... Am I the only one who is super productive between 7am - 12:30pm. And after those hours I'm near useless 😞. Brain is to tired to solve problems effectively.

How do you guys combat the afternoon slump/drain?

So I've changed desks in my office. Now my back is to a wall and nobody can look over my shoulder.

Time to dedicate one monitor to devRant I guess.
Looks like it's gonna be a good week.

Why I quit playing video games 15 years ago, and how that impacted my life.

In a land far far away (probably from where you are) on a distant planet (probably for aliens reading this) In a typical city, in a typical apartment, I woke up from a deep deep sleep, the kind of sleep that you can only have if you've been up the previous 2 days binge playing final fantasy 7.

It was a day like any other, except, on this day, I had a haunting thought:

"What if I played my LIFE, like I did video games"?

Long story short. I couldn't play video games anymore. Instead of "working" I saw it as gaing exp points. Instead of "failing" I saw it as necessary to build up character flaws.... etc.

I haven't looked back. I created 3 businesses, I learned psychology, marketing, programming, law, etc etc.

I look at my current status, strength points, charisma points, intelligence points, etc.
And I'm proud.

You get the idea.

Later, I realized something else. If I work all day in front of a computer, how can I play in front of a computer too?

This could be a better post, but you get the gist.

Know the role video games plays in your life, and don't let it play YOU.

Windows 10 as a development environment... Oh freakin' goody.
📍Multi-montor is finicky
📍Text scaling is still horribly broken
📍It takes longer to resume from standby than my old laptop takes to boot up from a cold start
📍Color matching LCD monitors is pants-on-head retarded
📍32GB of RAM isn't going to be enough...

This is going to be a long summer in corporate land.

Stuck on a problem for 2 hours, walk away for a coffee, return to fix it in 2 mins.

Should take breaks every 5 mins to maximize productivity.

I'm gonna code today and I'm going to be productive!

*binge watches Orange Is The New Black*

If there were no keyboars shortcuts,I would have been 50% less productive.

When you move from one "agile" company to a truly agile company. Wow. Productivity has gone through the roof!

I am speechless! Assigned back to a project after leaving it for four months, went to see tasks, and they are like this:
Q1. Why did't you do this for the app?
A1: Because your team has not yet provided API, how is my team supposed to implement

Q2: Why having this in the app? either x or y not both!
A2: You guys wanted both

Q3: Why is the app showing data that must not be displayed?
A3: Because your server is sending me the data based on the criteria I sent? What else do you expect

and the list goes on ....

Greatest productivity hack?

TDD

Today I discovered what slowed my productivity the most: variable naming.

In a project I was naming many variables 'dirname' in different parts of the my code, but it represented 3 things: only the name of the directory, relative path + directory, and absolute path + directory.

I wasted to much time just figuring out which was which everytime until I finally decided to organize variables names better and see the wonders of the world. Result:
- dirname: only the name
- reldirname: relative path + dir
- absdirname: absolute path + dir

Such simple solution, yet took me years to actually see the benefits, my god

(First devRant post btw :3)

This is the 12th day without internet and my productivity is increased by 100%. I'm impressed.

Do away with open-plan offices.Who are the idiots who thought this would improve "productivity"..

Well good morning to you too Windows....

That moment when you enter the elusive state of mind where you're getting serious shit done aannnnnnnddd you're interrupted. FUCK!

Had to spent a bit of time doing some statistical analysis today and decided to give R a shot. I could have done it in python but I knew it'd be a bit of hassle.

3 lines of code later I had the plot I wanted.

Had devrant whitelisted on the company firewall.

Say goodbye to my productivity ^^

We've all been there, right?
productivity--

My daily Productivity...

When you realize that you've been been flipping between two tabs in your browser for the better part of an hour, and they have nothing to do with your project, you need the day to end.

I tried vim for a few weeks. I almost used to it. But I didn't see how I could be more productive with it than with Visual Studio Code, at all, so I switched back. Maybe because I'm super fast with my mouse because of my 2500 hours of Dota. But knowing how to use vim is super useful when doing remote stuff via SSH. Nano too basic.

My former team had an "ux expert" who made ux templates for new features.

For years since he started his job, the team was told that there will be a first face-2-face meeting.

It never came to this point.

Instead all the team know about this guy is that his name is Thomas and that he does all the talk and decisions with our client without a word with the team, bringing their imaginations to li(f|v)e...

Genius! xD

No wonder the team got mad after some water had ran down the river.
At first they only questioned really poor design decisions.
But after a while the productivity of the team dropped, because they weren't willing to accept any of those design decisions.

Boi o boi.
Things escalated pretty well ;)

How I stay focused:

1. Isolating headphones with energizing music.
2. Partition of job to smaller tasks (1-2h of work)
3. Short break after each task.
4. Closed DevRant, Facebook, Reddit and other media.

I love to code in coffee shop likes Starbucks and its really boost my productivity, until I realized I could broke if I always go here so I make clone the Starbucks environments to my bedroom.

Then I buy cheap loudspeakers and coffee bean, playing unknown jazz music and pretend that I am in coffee shop. productivity increased! outcome decreased!

What do you prefer to listen to when you code?

Every IDE should have an option to open Stack Overflow directly after an Exception is thrown.

Telling myself that I can actually code in bed and be productive...
fails everytime

While(meeting)
{
Productivity = 0;
}

I just lost a competition that I worked my fucking ass off for 5 months
Depression 100%
Programming Productivity 0%

Truth: You will regret not using Kotlin as soon as possible. Don't deprive yourself of pleasant development and productivity boost.

Just two more weeks until I'm at full productivity again... Typing with this thing on is not very easy!

I swear, once I called in sick just so that I could finish coding a feature without distractions( like pings and shit)

Apparently...

Why is it that a lot of developers don't have the most basic of Windows knowledge? For example, a lot of people complaining about Windows Update. I mean, it's just a setting you can configure and a service you can stop and turn off..

It all sounds ironic.

!rant

I think one of the best moment of life is finding a good song all of sudden. It's like finding a new drug which I can just inject in my ear and code at 100% productivity.

Here’s mine :) Most comfy for productivity 👌🏻

Music is affecting my productivity. Office music not mine 😕

Cafe like this is where productivity push in

Working late nights for the most productivity because you're a night owl and don't have to interact with a new colleague/coworker/manager/client every 5 minutes

I have my rubber duck so its my productivity hack.

That feeling you get when you write an automation package on top of selenium and python that at a press of a button runs through an entire User Checkout process 😍

Oh the hours this is going to save me.
Now to see what else I can automate in my day to day life.

If you are working on multiple projects a great tool to make you very productive and keep organized is a simple checklist.

For many years I have jotted one down each and every morning listing what I want to accomplish that day. I even include simple items. Crossing each task out as I complete it gives me a sense of accomplishment.

Checklists have enabled me to complete projects at work and many free and commercial side projects including software and technical books.

Do you use checklists? If there is a particular type you like?

Over the past weeks since I've learned of devRant it has taught me one equation.

devRant ++ == -- productivity

😁

Tell that to almost all owners of my previous workplaces

This is the poster I have on my door, in the hopes it would determine people from disturbing me and consequently taking me out of the zone and productivity streak I'm on. Sadly it does not work as often as I'd like it to 🙁 but I still love it 😆

Fffuuuck you Nvidia, you worthless piece of shit company. There's a part of the world that doesn't use Windows. Grow the fuck up. Torvalds gesture makes complete sense when you get a new kickass laptop, load kickass fedora 25, but are unable to tap into it's graphic potential. You spend 2 days trying to install the fucking driver. The next day you decide to follow one blogpost instead of 2 and You're forced to reinstall fedora and the cycle repeats. The past 4 days have been painfully unproductive.

Just got my tiny thermonuclear fusion reactor delivered! Can’t wait for them to wire this inside my rib cage!

Don’t be fooled by that spark – it’s really tiny.

Welcome infinity energy, goodbye constant tiredness and headaches!

If you’re tired of the great Bleeps & Bloops playlist by Spotify, I’ve created Volume 2 and 3. Same kind of “background ambience”-feeling. Perfect when coding 😄

I've started to do some time tracking and just after one day of doing it I noticed that I can't get more that 10 mins working without someone interrupting me.

I love to help and hate to say no, but this is killing my productivity and delaying my work.

Most of the time my help isn't really needed too. "Did you clear the cache?" "Did you run yarn install after pulling?" "Let me look at the stack trace/error message." Sentences like these are all I need to say most of the time.

Did my coworkers get lazy because I'm there to help? Should I start say "not now" more often? Or should I just look for a better team somewhere else?

I just feel sad for the productivity app that I downloaded couple of months ago :(

I never even opened it for once

There are two types of people: Doers, and Talkers.

It really annoys me when talkers (who do nothing) ask me to stop doing things because it makes their lack of productivity look bad.

So sorry sweetheart, if you want to look better, just start doing work yourself and then you don't have to worry about my work making you look bad.

Unbelievably slow connection. Wanted to do speed test so I can post with proof. The connection disconnected the moment I click the "Test speed" button.

New company issued desktop is running win7 *criiiiiinge*

Solution: run linux on VirtualBox!

Efficiency++
Productivity++

I can't stop procrastinating from doing what I need to do. This extends to even web development and coding on personal projects, which is something I really enjoy doing.

It's as if I have some sort of underlying fear holding me back each time I get the chance to get things done. Normally I don't have the time and make the excuse for myself that there "is not enough time" but tbh I now literally have an entire week in front of me free, with nobody to distract me. I am actually getting my long-desired time alone. I can finally power through all the things that require intense focus, like coding.

And yet, I can't bring myself to just do it. Instead I make excuses and go play video games instead (Overwatch has been a really bad time sink for me). I haven't been able to do what I wanted to for like a year now. What the fuck is wrong with me?

I need help guys!! Anyone have advice for me?

Fuck me sideways. I work for a small business doing most of their IT work, a lot of which is in-house software development. Today I was working on a feature of our employee schedule system that I wrote and for the last couple of hours, my laptop (which is my dev machine) kept freezing up on me every ten minutes or so... 😬

Well, I finally found the cause, but only after running apt-get update/upgrade to see if updating fixed the issue. I haven't updated in a LONG time... Productivity is not on the agenda for today I suppose.

How bad has YouTube consumed you ranters? What do you burn those hours on?

Post yours.
YouTube > profile > time watched

My productivity hack? I code in the shower and use a water whiteboard. I have to be up very early and feel the most clear headed right when I wake up.

If I'm stumped on something, I can usually tackle it from a new perspective. For the most part it works out. Other then the occasional profanity if I accidentally erase something and the sometimes longer than usual showers, my wife doesn't mind. Usually because it's 5 in the morning and when she takes a shower there is this scribble that she tries to decode!

- Doesnt work jack during the day
- Productivity spike at 1am

Spending 20 minutes on Youtrack and 5 on actual coding......

'i aM A VeRy pRoDuCtIvE InDiViDuAl aNd i hAvE DeDiCaTeD My lIfE To pRoGrAmMiNg'

develop/test/debug in one screen. Best Monitor Setup :D

Why are days so short? Feels like I can't do/learn enough with what little time I have for my time awake to not be wasted. Wanting to be more productive.

I was struggling to make advancements in my task because I was so oriented by the "more code means more work done"... I wasn't producing at all. Now that I grabbed a notebook and a pen and started to think things through, things are finally rolling. Sometimes it's 90% thinking and 10% coding. In addition to that, I can't even write spagetti code after getting a solid concept written in pen. I just hate that I spend so much time thinking until something good comes up. But hey now it's rollinnnnnn.

Share your look-busy scripts

I'm talking about some script, or command(s) which output impressive garbage to the screen. For instance, `tree / | od` or `ping google.ca | xxd` might be enough to dazzle an executive, but to really ensnare a fellow dev, you need to get a bit more complex.

So let's see those scripts! From stupid simple, to application-level complex, I wanna see 'em all! :D

I'M OUT OF WHISKY!
Creativity -= 100;
Motivation--;
Productivity--;

I guess no home project for tonight...

What kind of music do you listen to when you code?
Me: Pendulum

You know, one of my worst fears as a programmer isn’t a bug, or shitty clients, it’s not even happening on my computer.

It’s when I can’t find a good playlist to listen to because the good ones I listen to way to much and I get sick of them so I get stuck with nothing and my Brain simply can’t function without a butt shaking toon!

Everything that makes me forget this

That moment when you block fb and reddit on pc to boost productivity but devRant screws you over.

Am I the only one that comes to the sad realization that if I wanna have a happy and healthy lifestyle I have to sleep a lot and avoid caffeine and do exercise on a daily basis and, on the other hand, if I wanna do all the things I'd like to do concerning software development (and hold a regular job) I have to sacrifice sleep, exercise and switch water to coffee?

Little self control when going out on weekends. It really drops productivity the next week. But it's sure is fun :)

What is everyone's goto to-do list tool/app and why?

After 13 months of 12 hour days going back to 7 hours, how will I explain productivity going up... (Been burnt out for last 10 months)

Novice seeking advice, how do you indie/solo dev guys manage your time and productivity to stay clear on what to prioritize and deliver faster ?

Another Monday, another 3.5 hour IT meeting where the devs give 5 minutes of updates then sit through 3 hours and 25 mins of the network team getting their shit together.

when you have one of those days where your mind constantly blanks out and your ability to focus is null...

Had suggested using Workstations and external monitors for the workforce to improve the overall productivity.

Fell on Deaf Ears...

Now, almost a year later, suggestions come from the top level asking for the same !
😒

Looks like whole world is not giving a fuck about work, recently.
Source GII - global innovation index.

What are your favorite hotkeys? Some of mine:

Super+x: opens xterm(by far my most used hotkey)
Alt+space: opens mutate launcher prompt
Super+Alt+c: opens selectable clipboard history
Super+Alt+d: toggles window decoration
Shift+Alt+4: enables draggable selection rectangle for screenshots(like on a Mac)
Alt+keypad_minus: switch to next virtual desktop
Super+tab: opens rofi for keyboard filterable selection of open applications

Wish my organization would let me use Linux on my work laptop. Productivity would be much better....

I used to read the news first thing in the morning, and then I found DevRant... so much for the news, and for productivity ...

var productivity = null;

Spotify Premium. without it, productivity drops immediately to 0

Work expands so as to fill the available time. That's Parkinson's Law.

Or in other words: The amount of time that one has to perform a task is the amount of time it will take to complete the task

So, if you have a deadline, wait until the correct time and then start working. This helps a lot in terms of not over-doing things and will save precious man-hours.

My productivity has gone fucking low.
I have hundreds of things ti do , Prepare for exams, write code for my internship project,write code for my game, learn new things about ML,etc.
But all I fuckin do is play games all day instead of making mine!

Plz help, give me some words of encouragement or tell me something that you do to boost your productivity and keep away from distractions !

bool showUpLateToWork=true;
bool rememberHeadPhones=false;
String DayOfWeek=Tuesday;
int hoursSpentOnPhoneLastNight=
int productivity = 100 - hoursSpentOnPhoneLastNight;
if(showUpLateToWork)
missStandup();
}
if(rememberHeadPhones)
Productivity +=10
Else
Productivity -=50;

While (hourOfDay(now()) <17)
{
drinkMntDew();
discussDataQualityIssuesWithBusiness();
lookThroughTonsOfPoorlyWrittenCodeForDefectThatBusinessWantsFixedYeasterday();
dieOnTheInside();
curseProjectTeamForPassingCrapCodeToMaintainaceTeam();
cry();
curseComputerApplicationsForNotResponding();
visitBathroomWhileLurkingDevrant();
}
goHome();
while (!asleep && hourOfDay(now()) > 17)
{
playWithPuppy();
qualityTimeWithMyWife();
pkayLeagueOfLegends();
netflixAndChill('litterally');
for (int i =1; i <=5; i++)
showLoveUsingLoveLanguage(i);
try
{
makeBaby();
} catch
{
learnPatience();
}
cuddle();
if(!wifeAwake)
checkDevrant()
}

From writing back-end with expressJS to find out how mountain goat climbs near vertical peaks.

My productivity over this weekend is not looking good so far.

When it's a lovely day outside and you're stuck in waiting for an import to finish.

Best productivity hack of them all: the multi-clip clipboard, with search.

I don't understand why (or even how) I'm expected to be productive without a stable internet connection.
My computer doesn't have WiFi capabilities and the ethernet connection sucks too.
So, here I am passing time while waiting for Gitlab to load...

Kraken rum is my favorite productivity hack.

Does the speed of your coding become slower as the day goes on?

Yay! I can build my avatar now... Good bye afternoon productivity!

Generator functions should be treated like sorting algorithms: Not worth your time if all you have is 4 or less async instructions.
Callback hell is actually kind of nice and warm when you're a just a few levels down. If you're really confused by your obfuscated code, you suck at node.

Lady comes over to my cube and stands silently until I notice her in the mirror. She cheerfully asks that I help her reset her password.

Okay...one, I'm buried up to my balls in work that needs to be done, and here she is camping, expecting me to feel a disturbance in The Force to help on her whim, when our company has an issue system for shit like this. 👊

Two, I'm 👏 a 👏 developer 👏! My sign says Software Engineer on it, which might give some context as to why she forgot her password.

Look, I was nice to her. But it seems like I'm getting more and more phone calls and surprise visits lately from people that I shouldn't be.

Got my work MacBook Pro today and I've been setting it up. I'm not exactly a fan of windows (because I'm not crazy) but bloody hell do I miss reading the installation instructions of some tool/software/etc... and then, y'know, installing it.
Now I've gotta google how to install said tool on mac, read 50 badly written blog posts that all disagree on how to do it.
Just spent 30 fuckin' minutes setting JAVA_HOME. Not because it's hard but because no two idiots agree on how it's done. Fuck me.
Getting git to work was pretty easy... except none of the auto-complete works. And again nobody could give you a solid answer on how to get it working, so I guess there goes another 30 minutes.

Whichever idiot ever said that Macs "just work" should jump in front of something large moving very fast.

When you install a debug tool just to debug the debug tool...

There goes my productivity

Boss asks me to come to work earlier, "there are a lot of things to do". Came earlier. Productivity is now really low because I'm tired.

Always thought programming on a MAC would increase productivity. Got one, now all I do is changed iTerm themes.

Software project in technical college:
Expectation: Ok guys, we have about one month to finish our project. We have a lot of stuff to do, so let's start right away.
Reality: So we have one more day until the project needs be submitted. Hmmm... I guess we're going to start by tomorrow.

One of the barriers to professional software development is OCD.

Is this code right? No, fix. Wait, no, still not right.
Did I just commit this? Check again.. did jira reload properly? Wait, checking again, did I commit this? Checking. Did I commit this? Checking. Is my mind fooling me about committing this? Checking.

while(true){
goCrazy();
}

Holy shit, I just figgured out how to adjust the bass of my headphones; Coding boost incoming!

PC was slow as shit yesterday, but this is taking 1,5 hours...
So far for productivity

Hi fellow devs!

As a developer it is a crucial to be productive. Obviously the most effecient way is to get in the flow.
What is your rituale to reach this state?

The amount of work I do in one day of working from home, ensures that I can just slug around the office for the rest of the week.

new season of my hero academia + weeaboo developer = no productivity whatsoever

I got back to tweaking my de/terminal.
I may or may not have written a scipt that finds all installed nerd fonts, opens st with each of them and then sorts them.
I hate myself.

Me: I'm going to school, I am going to be so productive today!

Goes to school : WiFi - 0.25 mbps

The app I'm working on is so useful to me I can't wait to finish it. Yeah, I'm excited for it.

Saturday, music and code. That’s life.

Screen real estate is directly proportional to productivity. Employers understand this!

where are my Trello peeps? Evernote? what's your favorite productivity app?

Update on my boss: higher discussion rate in the projects slack channel = higher productivity to him. We could be sitting around discussing this and that of its details over slack while putting down a 6 pack and he would feel more confident at the end of the day then if we were actually working. Having a boss that runs the entire business off emotion is incredibly exhausting

when my boss gives new customers a tour of the company i quickly open hackertyper.com to look extremly productive and talented.

What type of music do you listen to while programming ?
Share your playlist if you have any

I installed git and vim on my phone. Time to be productive for once!

Ok. Productivity round 2 - what do people DO (not use) that helps keep them productive and organized?

In a meeting where the executives are talking about bandwidth issues during the day that affect productivity, meanwhile the laptop being used for the presentation is running uTorrent