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HR - There is a 2 years gap on your CV!
Candidate - I was in jail.
HR - Why?
Candidate:- I killed the guy who told me : "We'll call you back".
HR :- Welcome on board, You have the Job.6 -
FUCK HIM! FUCK HIM!
JUST CAME TO REALISE THAT AN OLD CLASSMATE DURING UNIVERSITY STOLE 2 OF MY PROJECTS AND PUBLISHED 2 PAPERS UNDER HIS NAME.
HE EVEN ADDED THEM IN HIS CV.
SUCH PEOPLE SHOULD DIE.
Recently, at 2am, he even called me and asked for some doubts on other topic, I helped him too. Turns out such he was such a cheap person.
Let him call me next time...27 -
>you love Google
>you're writing a CV
>you have big ego
>your CV looks like that one
>you're probably me
28 -
Manager on the meeting room suddenly talking to me:
Coffe2Code, share your screen please to show us the progress.
Me: *minifies all windows fastly and plugs the laptop to the big screen *
Manager : we start with documentation, open the world file that you sent to me.
Me: *opens word*
Word: *freezing on my CV that I was editing for another job application*
Me: ...
Manager: ...
Word: oh everyone seen the CV? cool here your document11 -
"your password must contain a capital letter, two numbers, a symbol, an inspiring message, CV, a gang sign, a dragon blood"
7 -
My last promotion was a 2% raise for a hell of a lot more responsibility
Guess who's updating their CV 🙃6 -
My CV is done.
I listened to some hints, removed some of the childish and selfish texts and I am in this place, do you have any tips?
Yes, I put those photos specially
36 -
Junior wanted to have a look at my CV to get some idea.
I told him "yeah sure" and showed it to him.
He applied to our company for internship. The CV is exactly same as mine with only name and work experience edited.
ffs12 -
Phone call...
Caller: we contact you to arrange an interview for Java developer position, what time is good with you?
Me: Sorry Sir, I am javascript developer not Java developer!
Caller: You mentioned in your CV that you are using Java and Ayax for building applications!
Me: Trust me Sir, I don't have any relationship with your Ayax...
Caller: No problem, we can discuss this small technical difference in the interview. When you are available for it?
Me: No Sir, I am not available.7 -
- It's a game, play it
- Come prepared
- It's better to say "not sure" or "don't know" than bullshit
- Don't write in the CV (or mention during the interview) things you don't want to be asked about
- Sound eager and enthusiastic about your profession because no one likes a downer
- the interview is a sales meeting, you are the goods, be sure to be a good salesman10 -
I came to Spain escaping my home country and started looking for a job in ANYTHING. Had done some coding as a hobby but nothing serious, still I sent a CV to some starting positions online (also sent the same CV to pet shops, Starbucks, cloth stores...) And I got chosen to participate in a one week training course / trial at a big company.
At the same time I managed to get a spot on a free and amazing course for music production, my dream profession. Yet I had to go for the one that actually had some work opportunities!
Got the job after the trial was done and immediately got sent to work with a 3 person team that was in charge of setting up a giant SharePoint site for the local mail office. It was kind of insane! For months I had no idea what I was doing and thought I was going to get fired any day.
5 years later, I still have no idea.6 -
I read your CV and i called you for this interview but now i see that you are not qualified for this position.
You have to be certified by CISCO as a Software Developer.
That was the moment I knew he is a fucktard.1 -
Stop using progress bars on your résumé/CV!
Back when we were looking for people to join us, we got hundreds of résumés in the mail and online, and I saw so many of them using these progress bars to indicate competency in a particular skill or programming language.
Yknow what that says to me, and to my colleagues?
"Yeah, I'm ok at this, but I'm even worse at THIS"
Your résumé is about selling yourself!
We don't want someone who's '68%' in Photoshop or '82%' in JavaScript. We want someone who knows they're good at what they do and knows they can learn if they need to.
You might feel like you're being 'big headed', but that's what a good resume SHOULD be! Sell yourself to be as if you're the solution to all of my problems and you might just get a job!
Rant over.32 -
Caller: My client looking for experienced developer in Technology X,Y and Z are you open for new position?
Me: But I don't know this X and Y, I only use Z!
Caller: Please add them to your CV and send it to me so I can pass it to the client...
Me: But I don't know it!
Caller: Neither me nor the client know it also, please update the CV...
Me: How many years of experience should I add then?
Caller: 3 years will be OK!
Me: §¢“°©™|-=]%5 -
Sorry John Doe, you're application for this job has been rejected. As we specified for this job you need to know about GitHub. In your CV you stated that you are an expert in git but our job requires the knowledge of hub as well. Good luck next time10
-
Top 5 reasons to come to Hackathon
1. Experience for your CV
2. Free swags
3. Networking
4. Free swags
5. Free Stickers (swags)9 -
HR - There is a 2 years gap on your CV!
Candidate- I was in Yale.
HR - Oh wow that's great! You're hired!
Candidate - Yay! I got a yob!5 -
I'm hiring and I'm fucking done with recruiters buttering up skills etc and sending me BS candidates.
Interview earlier today...
CV: MySql skill level 10 (out of 10)
Reality: Can't write a simple JOIN!
Yesterday...
CV: PHP 6+ years exp, self proclaimed ninja/jedi/oracle.
Reality:
[Me]: Write me a function to map an array to x.
[Ninja]: What's an array?
I've come to the conclusion that the type of dev I want on my team is highly unlikely to be looking for work much less using some piece of shit shady agent to find work so I need to hunt him / her down personally and can use the phenomenally large recruiters fee as a hiring bonus / incentive.
Only problem now is finding quality full stack devs in the area (Johannesburg, South Africa).
I'm thinking of posting a 'challenge' job add to filter out good candidates - some kind of code challenge to be solved that gives them my contact info. Any one have any creative ideas I could try?31 -
I've had 3 interviews with the same company. The first two interviews went pretty well, they looked interested, on the third they tell me "your CV says you are not graduated yet, we can't hire you now".
SO WHY THE FUCK DID YOU HAD TO WASTE MY TIME?
You've had my CV before the first interview, why the hell didn't you read that I am still a student? Is the first thing it's written on it! Stupid fuckers.5 -
Phone rings, recruiter: "hi Scott just come across your CV and really want to talk to you about an exciting opportunity"
Me: "Ok, cool, can I just qualify this call, what was the keyword search you used to find my profile?"
Recruiter: "it's for a Java developer role for an exciting employer"
Me: "so you matched me on a Java training course I did 8 years ago?"
Recruiter: "ok, but I see you're fully qualified in c#"
Me: "you mean the support developer role from 5 years ago?"
Recruiter: "yes"
Me: "😑"
Recruiter: "listen it's a pretty bad line can I call you on a land line or drop you an email?"
Me: "sure drop me an email with your contact details and I'll give you a call back"
Still waiting on that email...
Why can't recruiters just admit straight away that they blindly called you without even reading your CV8 -
I applied to Amazon recently not really thinking about it I was just bored. Dropped my CV and I was asked to fill in why would I want to work in that position. I un-ironically put “It sounds like a lot of fun”, got rejected instantly then got an unrelated message from an Amazon recruiter from another division inviting me to apply, rejected it because it didn’t sound as fun.
I’m an honest bloke I just want to have fun.
11 -
What the fuck, it says on both my LinkedIn profile and on my CV that I'm a student but I can take on part time projects, and I also told a recruiter the same thing over phone (after he found me on LinkedIn).
Today I had lunch with said recruiter. Guess who had no clue I was a student?
9 -
I don’t have a degree, nor has a degree ever prevented me from being hired / doing my job.
Now that’s not to say all businesses / companies will over look your education section on the CV, But for me it’s never been a problem.
#SelfTaughtDevsMatter3 -
A recruiter asks for my LinkedIn credentials to save me from the hassle of updating my profile.
Is this the new 'send me your cv in .doc format so I can write whatever I want in there'?
I'm not even looking for a job and I don't know who you are! Fuck off!3 -
Wait... wait....., I'm the sole developer at a company does that make me the Lead Developer and Senior Developer. TIME TO UPDATE THE CV13
-
They just called me, saying they found my CV online 🤔 My CV is not online 😂 Still this is quite a good working environment 🙃6
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So my local job center had me convert my LaTeX CV into Word format, as apparently PDF is to techy for them.5
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To the junior student in my university who copied my CV from top to bottom:
Fuck you and your cockless ancestors. I hope you never get a solid job using that CV. I curse you and your copied CV and all the others that might use it. You are the reason why companies make the recruitment process to complicated. Because retards like you can't be bothered to use your creativity to make something original. Fuck you asshole15 -
I'm planning to put this comment somewhere in our code for the future developers to see.
/**
لقد اتخذت القرار الخاطئ بالتقدم إلى هذه الشركة. اترك الآن قبل فوات الأوان. أنا المطور السابق وحياتي أصبحت بائسة. البيروقراطية ، السياسة ، تأخر الرواتب ، عدم الابتكار. أسوأ رمز رأيته حتى الآن.
**/
Edit: Too late, I already did. git commit . git push
Time to update my CV :) any job openings you can recommend?
12 -
Decided yesterday night that it was time to leave this joke of a company. Updated my CV, changed my pic on my CV and posted the CV on Monster.
15 phone calls, 4 emails, 3 adds on LinkedIn, 3 planned interviews and this is just the morning.7 -
One of my top 10 worst meetings, was for an interview for a job I really wanted. The guy started off the technical interview by asking me about language features that had been replaced since before I started learning the language. Told him when I started learning and his reply was:
"Yeah I see that on your CV, but come on, you MUST know this stuff".
eh no asshole, because its been removed for 4 years, you MUST know its not relevant10 -
An amazing recruiter found me on LinkedIn. According to her cv she has incredible skills such as “Internet Browsers“ and “Google Calender“. Maybe I should give her a call?3
-
If you’re having trouble with the bossman’s ‘tude
He’s giving you the blues
You wanna dev, but not for this dude
Here’s what you gotta do:
Pull up the CV, it’s that easy
Send it every time
Just use a throw-away email, hey.10 -
If Corona Virus, were to make a CV, it would make an interesting read:
1. Responsible for Global Digital Transformation.
2. Reduction of Global CO2 emission and Greenhouse gasses.
3. Global Hygiene initiatives: Ensured 100% compliance on washing hands and body bath.
4. Made industry shift to WFH - saved exposure and costs.
5. Reduction in noise pollution by making everyone keep their mouth shut (masked).
6. Taught cooking, vegetable shopping, housekeeping to many,
7. Provided ample time to all egoistic and self centered people, to contemplate on their mortal nature.
8. Provided a big boost to the Pharma sector and brought back small utility stores back into the limelight.
9. Highlighted the importance of governance, adaptability and long term planning, by all sectors.
Corona’s CV seems superior to many 😉2 -
If your only experience is Uni, don't put skills down as 'Advanced' on your damn CV
Lower expectations, deliver results -
How to make Xcode crash:
1. type: self.btn
2. Profit!
I need to add this on my CV as an expert in making xcode crash, not implying that Xcode is a shit IDE !!6 -
Recruiters are fucking unbelievable sometimes.
With about one year experience I applied to company A and company B. Kinda competitors in what dev skillset they're looking for.
Company A reviewed my CV and decided I don't have enough experience without giving me a chance to present my actual knowledge.
Company B tells me screw your CV come along show us what you got. I rocked the interview with an offer the next day which I accepted, absolutely thrilled.
Fast forward 7 months I get an email from company A, same recruiter, inviting me to an interview as they're "impressed with my profile and feel like I've gone a long way" (definitely just because company B hired me and I passed my probation)
Ah the joy responding to them that as I value honour and honesty quite highly I don't think I would be a culture match for company B where it is a norm to reject candidates and come back pouch them after they pass probation at competitors.
Eek.. instant apologies email and of course explaining it's not poaching but "exploring opportunities".
Screw company A, honestly.5 -
My CV shows that I have experience with Java and also python scripting but I keep getting calls about Javascript positions..... Cmon HR you better than that...2
-
HR, why so stupid?
I'm currently living in Sweden, want to move to Austria (significant other is studying there, I'm finishing my studies over here)
Me: *Applies for a Junior Java Dev job via company's online platform*
HR1: We like your CV, be here for an interview in person in 5 days.
Me: That's expensive, can we do it via Skype? I'm still in Sweden.
HR1: How are you planning on working in Austria while living in Sweden?
Me: I'm not. I'll move to Austria in 2 months. That's when I'd like to start working with you.
Me: *wonders why they skipped that part in my CV/cover letter as it's clearly stated there*
HR1: ....
Me: Hello?
Me: Helloooo?
HR2: We're sorry to tell you that the position of Senior Database Engineer has been filled. May we use your CV for other potential openings at our company?
Me: No worries, I applied for Junior Java Dev anyways. You may use my CV for other openings.
HR2: Oh, sorry for the confusion. I just mistyped the job title.
Me: *WTF? That was a machine-generated answer. Your system filed my application in the wrong place. You didn't mistype shit.*
HR1: Oh good for you. We've suddenly found out we need a Junior Java Dev as well as a Senior Database Engineer. Do you have time for a Skype interview this afternoon?
Me: ....
HR1: Hello?
Me: ....
HR1: Tomorrow then?4 -
Me: So why did you drop the db?
Intern: I couldn't rename the Model I've just created.
Me: Your CV says you're a prolific Rails Dev.
Me: How many days you have left working here?
Intern: 3Months
Me: Just take 3 months off work.13 -
Did anybody of you automate job hunting?
Like Webscraping online job offers, extract adress, keywords and put it into a cv template, set up personalised html-email and website.
Extra perk, a neural network which composes the cover letter.
that i would need.10 -
CVs be like:
"Voluntarily worked as a tech consultant in impoverished communities to promote social mobility and empowerment through the implementation of a specialized computer science learning program and interactive software handling sessions."
Translation: helped my parents attaching word docs to their emails. -
WTF!
Linkedin stories..
this is not Instagram or Facebook or any of those sites.
Linked in is for Companies and yourself to have a public CV in a fixed format that for everyone is the same and easy to understand! F#CK!!
12 -
My last post was over a month ago about updating my CV to escape this place.
Pleased to report I got the job 😎3 -
Recruiter: Hey! I found your CV and think you'd be great for this position.
Me: You clearly haven't read my CV. I don't know, nor have ever worked with anything you've mentioned. Why are you wasting my time? -
The things on your cv are suppose to be known by you, not by your colleague from the previous job.
I had a guy on interview, who talked about his colleague's work... wtf.4 -
When you know how to develop with WordPress but you hate it so much you dont even bother putting it on your CV as a skill.5
-
Today, during an update from senior management, I was casually sitting in the corner filling in my CV to get out of here lol.3
-
Would it be a bad idea if I mention my biggest project is a Discord bot supplying explicit material to a total of 7000 servers on my CV?
Honestly unsure.13 -
Company : Posted a developer job paid ad with proper JD and all info.
Candidates : Sent CV and applied for job vacancy.
Company : Called them to arrange interview.
Candidates : Accepted the appointment.
*Interview Day*
2/7 showed up on time.
1/7 requested to postpone.
4/7 disappeared.
Me : 🤔 🤷 🤐5 -
why the fuck do i have to fill out all these job search websites' forms to generate a CV for me ? i already have a fucking CV !!!6
-
Not really a rant but my biggest fuckup that entirely ruined my IT career and future life
> be me 21yo CS student looking for an internship
> looking for help with my friend and sent him my CV to apply to a big corp
> then I lied that I have sent CV to official email {here the fuck up begins}
> after that I got an instant phone call from a friend of him claiming that the CV was sent properly and I am going to visit a company
> I had a review but it was recorded my CV hasn't got precisely specified technologies so interviewer thought I can manage to work as a dev not an intern
> with my shitty communication skills I managed to "work" there 8days, fucked up someone's computer by deleting his Windows and all data he had and installing Ubuntu instead
> then shit got out of control for an intern I talked a lot of bullshit in this Corp they realized I was there an "alien" and I didn't even know what to do so I wanted to sudo rm - rf myself
> unfortunately my parents woke up that morning I decided to sudo rm - rf and and I am now in mental asylum with fucked up people and the Corp knows where am I and I am going to pay for my stupidity and being naive (I didn't even seen the CEO, I didn't have enough information that I really worked there)
> To sum up, being bipolar, naive and irresponsible has brought me to this point in life. Thank you for reading. I don't see a solution, my parents don't believe me and I feel isolated with this fuckup so I decided to share it as a remark for young people starting in IT. For me it already ended too fast.12 -
Boss asked me to work the weekend today...
Told him I have to buy some shoes and do work around the house so I can't.
In reality I'll be doing a personal project and prettying up my CV ofcourse!
🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕
P.S. this is for a project he has had me rewrite 3 times so far.5 -
Once upon a time I sent my CV to a handful of companies. Just for fun I mailed them my physical CV copies + personal statement/motivational letter (3 pages total).
Right at the end of the horribly formatted 12pt Comic Sans pages it read:
"Turn pages to read the Helvetica version".
Never actually wanted those jobs anyway...2 -
You start wondering if the CV you're reading is real when you see: "I have skills with emails and the Internet".1
-
Just dragged a button in the UI to fix a bug.
Hell yea, now I'll write about my Objective C skills in my CV...2 -
I'm attacking all the guys who run arch and think they are heroes. Just a load of noobs following online guides who want a cookie for their cv or water cooler street cred. Just fo.7
-
it wasn't even an interview, they were just glad my cv wasn't absolute garbage, it was basically an introduction and welcome to the team. the only question i remember being asked was wether i preferred FE or BE (which was pointless, because i ended up helping with full stack)2
-
So today I started editing my CV because I want to apply for an internship in the UK; and because I've already got a Dutch CV, I just opened that document and started working from there.
*selects Dutch part*
*presses crtl + /*
Comment out the Dutch parts! 🤦3 -
Recruiter: Hi, we like your CV. Do you have a portfolio?
Me: Yeah, the links on my CV.
Recruiter: Oh nice. We'll send you an email with some job roles.
Don't get an email....2 -
When you put your CV online with it specifically saying you are looking for a junior front end role and keep getting contacted for jobs that are way over your head or totally irrelevant to IT.
Fuck recruiters.3 -
We need another developer to our team, but my team leader wants someone who is familiar with our stack. A week later HR comes to our room :
"Look I have a perfect candidate! He knows all things you have listed, plenty of experience. Please take a look and I will organize an interview".
Team leader took a glimpse and started to laugh: "This is my CV from before I started working here"1 -
When you create your CV in HTML/CSS print as PDF and attach that to the job application, because word is annoying you with its lack of layout abilities.
I just wanted this bit of text over there --->
but no, I have to go make a text box, position that thing in an "absolute" way and have it still be wrong when exporting as PDF.
Really how hard is it to let me build a nice layout 😒10 -
I applied for a google step internship today. My cv is pretty good (people say). University transcript is a malformed csv and I am forced to provide a screenshot. Wish me luck.3
-
so ive been looking for a java internship for the past days but fuck me, ive made a very huge mistake......
I FORGOT TO ADD JAVA TO MY CURRICULUM
*flips chair*
*flips table*
*flips shit*
hopefully they will see my extra message/letter and read because if they only look at my cv, and see theres no java there, im gonna be rejected real fast :(
wish me luck guys, i went from job hunting to internship hunting bc im reallt desperate now7 -
I don't get it. We're looking for a web developer and we're getting CVs from a continent over from people with no programming experience or with no web experience. What is going on?
Like there's this CV is from a guy that only does C++ in Kuala Lumpur... We're in Canada.
No one is local nor qualified. I thought a Wordpress dev position would be easier to feel.7 -
I'm doing my CV in Vue with Bulma and everything is all nice and neat. I have a nice and neat 'skills' section that you can see pictured, and it's nice and neat. However, what is not very nice and neat is Firefox (and chrome's) print to PDF thing which ignore the nice little semi meaningless dots that I have, which is so fucking asdfghjkl;
27 -
>Be me
>Loose job just before Covid started its crap
>About to get new job
>"We'll be in contact after the lock down"
>Fuuuuuuu.jpeg
>Months later, country starts open up little
>Starting to look more proactively again
>Company from before "no positions atm"
>Really liked that place, so Fuuuuuuu.jpeg again
>Talking to recruiter, they have something in mind
> Need assessment. Understandable
>They send a separate assessment for every single language on my CV and the cake thief thing
>NotImpressedMikalya.jpeg2 -
Applied to a job I knew I was a perfect match for but never heard back. Wondered why but ah well. Applied to another and go to edit my cover letter to find out I had "joined the company when I was three years old" inside of it. Note don't write cover letters at midnight when your tired.2
-
I found a recruiter that read my CV. My CV, he READ it... ALL of it!
I'm keeping this one, he is very well trained! -
a company just contacted me after receiving my CV, they sent me a .sketch file to make into a website. I don't have a fucking MAC. WTF10
-
I've never solved any LeetCode problems.
I've never gotten grades above 80% in my academics.
I've never taken an online course in anything.
I've never gotten any certifications other than my Master's degree.
I've never written a CV for a job application.
How the fuck did I manage to survive for 7 years in this industry?13 -
Just changed my wallpaper to be the Tensorflow logo and added 'background in data science' to my CV.2
-
Just send my CV and shit to a recruiter that wanted it.
I do like my current job, but working with military/spaceshit feels tempting.1 -
applying for a job at a company whose website is broken is kinda ironic
Todays gems are
- the menu item jobs isn't clickable. I have to find a link elsewhere
- the application form has a second page a "this is what you entered" page. It switches month and day of my birthday. I returned to first page to check. Here it's still fine. Now I needed to reupload my attachments because the "field is empty" - lets see if they get my CV twice
- the jobs page doesn't even load. firefox eventually prompts "This site is slowing down the browser ... [stop]"6 -
Sent my cv through a local job finder website, 2 days later got an interview, 2 days later got a technical interview, 2 days later I was already sitting on my new desk
-
When a dev says that he's a really good programmer in his CV/Résumé he usually actually means that he's really good at browsing stackoverflow4
-
so I'm here watching my boss' whatsapp blinking "typing..." for 5 minutes wondering of it's bugged, he's drunk or I have to update my CV...3
-
Applied for job. CV says I've been a web developer for over 6 years. Js included.
Recruiter doesn't read and discards me with b.s. excuse that I haven't developed with JS for more than 3 years.
I clarify that with polite email. Her boss send me an email to fill my portfolio on .docx file.
Wtf? I let it go.
Two days later they tell me I'm not responsible for doing their b.s. documentation.7 -
So we're looking for a new developer, my boss sends me an email with a subject "Intresting CV". It was for a office clerk who altered a Wordpress website for the company they use to work for
-
Never put a thing on your CV that you don't actually know. I've seen many people put a lot of languages that they don't really know, just to impress the interviewer and get rejected.
Also, be confident..... even when you are bluffing.4 -
Sent a cv to a company because facebook threw their ad at my face and i said why not. They emailed me that they would call me today. I dont have a phone. Its not fucking 2007. Call me on matrix or telegram or even skype ffs.19
-
Had an interesting application for a web / fs position the other day. Some guy in his 40s sent a CV, along with a bunch of 5+ years old reference letters (recommending him for things like PHP 5.3 and ExtJs 4). A bit outdated but okay.
And then, he put in a list of NPM packages he used. Not just relevant frameworks like Angular & React, or tools like Webpack and Babel. No. A list. Of. NPM. Packages. There were things like UUID there, which is literary a single function!2 -
I don't know which is worse, taking ages to find a typeo in your code or taking ages to find a typeo in your CV. :(6
-
So here goes my first rant...
I was looking for a job as a software developer when I saw one nice company hiring.
I apply to them via their form online. Then they invite me to come to their event during which they will explain everything in details.
I go there (despite the time of the event being uncomfortable for me) and listen to them for a while. Basically, they say they will send the test task to all applicants and see how it goes.
Later same day they email me saying they didn't get my CV via their form and they need me to resend it so they can send the test task. Alright, no big deal, done.
Now today they email me saying "sorry, motherfucker, better luck next time".
What the actual fuck? I spend my fucking time to go to some shitty event saying a test task will decide everything to not even get one.
So, naturally, I go and re-check my email: I definitely did send them my CV;
seems like they ignored the email and eliminated me from the application process for not having my CV, fuckers.
If they will ever in the future invite me to an interview/offer me a job there, I won't take for fucking triple pay.
Thanks for reading and helping me vent my anger, have a nice day:)2 -
I mentioned on a cv about 10 years ago that I had maintained a website built on php. This CV is no longer in circulation and hasn't been for about 9.5 years, I'm still getting message from recruiters about php roles
Fml3 -
Was filling an important form. It required my updated CV. Turned on windows to edit my CV. Turned it off and guess what...
Has been like this for the last half an hour
6 -
Oh really? I don't even have Java on my LinkedIn/CV, what the hell man? These freaking automated email are starting to piss me off!
Recruiters are the worst cancer in the modern job hunting
4 -
Looks like it's time to update the old CV... Christ have I really been here for 8 years.
It's been fun, the most fun time of my life but with new owners breathing on everything stuffs starting to fall to shit.
To use a SysOps analogy there are category 1 - critical warnings ringing in my ears.
I can accept a lot, but I'm genuinely concerned for the future of this place, and after trying to fix things for long enough to realise the new owners are the ones drilling the holes in the ship it's time to sink or swim, and I don't feel like sinking.
To quote billy Joel,
It seems such a waste of time
If that's what it's all about
Mama if that's movin' up
Then I'm movin' out1 -
So apparently hiring these days is all about 1/3 learning random questions and answers 1/3 remembering algorithms from code execution portals 1/3 luck. Well fuck my life, it’s worse then 5 years ago when I last switched jobs.
So how was it 5 years ago you ask ?
I send my cv with exposed java interviewed for javascript and hired for python. At least then it was 50/50 luck.5 -
Today marks literally the 4th time a recruiter has put me through to a technical test for a language/ framework i do not know. Even if you are tech illiterate just fucking ctrl f my cv to see if I know it. Absolute waste of time.1
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!rant && advice
I am an Android Developer, but about to start my final year. I got a mail from a company telling me saying...
"... and we are looking for problem solvers like you.
We Invite your CV and look forward to hearing back from you."
Stupid it may sound, but how do I reply to them? Do I also send a cover letter? If yes, what do I write? What do I mention in the email?
Thanks.1 -
Bit of an odd question maybe, but when sending out your CV to a company over email, what would you expect to be written / write in the email itself?
I've got a sysadmin position that I'd really like to apply to, and it seems like I'm ticking all the boxes, however some of the things like SSH authentication (I mean it's fairly basic, isn't it) I haven't mentioned on the CV at all because I feel it's to be assumed. But I'd like to mention it in the email itself along with motivation. Apparently there's this thing called a "motivation letter"? How does that work?
Point is, I could go on all day about these services they ask about and how they already exist in my home lab, but I'm not entirely sure whether I should just keep it brief and just say "here's my CV and there's my number", or go a bit in-depth about it in the mail. Perhaps something in between?9 -
I put my CV on one website and I've already had about 10 calls from recruiters. It's nice that they do all the work for you these days, but it kind of takes the fun out of it - are IT recruiters this common everywhere?11
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So I'm called down to the office the other day for a meeting, I get there and my boss says "hi this is John Doe he has applied for the developer role, can you give him the technical interview" had no time to prep, my boss didn't even give me a copy of his CV2
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Some time ago I was working in a freelance gig. I was the backend developer and the front end guy and I had some differences in our postman collections, so I asked him to email me his exported json collection.
When he emailed me, it was really funny to see his signature, which included all the courses he had and his degrees and whatnot.
like dude, "I didn't wanted your CV, I just wanted the collection"
PS: I hope you get the idea from the image, even if it is in spanish
7 -
I just finished running my first Arduino program, I am perfectly able to switch the led on and off.
Should I add it to the CV!!!
Or should I build the whole traffic light three leds first?!?
I am confused....2 -
I've never been a frontend guy, I only could modify existing FE code and had some clues about how to write a hello-world using angular.
I've just refactored ~150 files in an Angular project, created half a dozen new modules and modularized lots of loose artefacts.
And after recompiling the project still works! And is now more maintainable!
I think I now can safely add "Angular" to my resume :)
P.S. Damn it, Angular is cool!!!9 -
Having to fill skills field in my internship CV suddenly makes me realize that i actually am not really good at anything.
Some friends say that i'm a can-do-it-all person when i actually just learn how to do what i need to do on the spot.3 -
Now the real question is are you even allowed to put React in your cv if you've never worked with redux, don't know the concept of HOC and still make pull requests with componentWillReceiveProps ?
11 -
Heard a job position opened through a friend. Passed him my CV since we don't know his email (lol how?)
Got called for an interview + technical test. Came and they were expecting my CV. They somehow misplaced my CV (lol again how?)
Told the interviewers that I made a couple of apps for fun and informative. Tested me by doing a value switch between 2 variables without introducing a third variable. Done and dusted.
A month later, the company that interviewed me disappeared.
That's my definition of the worst interview rejection. Company pulled a Houdini without telling all of their candidates that we're rejected.14 -
My CV clearly says I don't have any Php experience.. yet.. comes a recruiter ask me if a Php job would fit my experience.
What the.. urgh seriously.10 -
Recruiter: «I have an opportunity [...] J2EE development [...] please send CV in .doc format»
Where is my flame thrower?4 -
What do you think about my resume?
I would like to apply for other jobs, im tired of my shitty actual job.
I'm worried about the ranting on the resume, is that politically correct?
https://drive.google.com/file/d/...15 -
!dev (maybe slightly)
I went to a CV Workshop organized by my first school. The presenter was the slightly-arrogant/know-it-all/cool type of guy who's a recruiter and also has his own company he runs. The presentation was OK, even though it took longer than announced. However, there were some things that bugged me. He expects everyone somehow to be extraordinary. Granted he works as a recruiter and his clients would like only the cream of the top, but some of the examples he gave from his personal experience, he seemed to give more gravity on other traits of the candidates than their achievements and qualifications (e.g. rejecting a candidate because she had posted a photo of her clubbing on Facebook). Also, somehow he judges candidates based on their parents profession. Lucky me that I fall into the category he dislikes. Now the fun part (sorry for the long post):
Next week there's a career day. I sent my CV as soon as I got the mail and then I also phoned the person in charge (as per the instructions). Yesterday on the workshop it was said we should resend our CVs by tomorrow on another mail? No problem you may think, but that said recruiter will take a look on them and that means I will have to rework mine just to make sure it is to his liking. I'm no fan of writing mission statements, nor trying to guess what my qualities (aka soft skills) are because what I think I am doesn't mean I actually am.
So now, I'm in a dilemma. Just send the CV as is or get a mental breakdown just so to please that person?
Thanks everyone for your patience and time, I just wanted to pump some steam out me...6 -
> phone rings during worktime hours
> "Yeah, I was contacting you on behalf of YADDAYADDA, I just found your CV in our database and I wanted to know if you were open to work for us"
Excuse me, how long ago did I submit my application?
> "Mmmmh... it says 2020"
What exactly am I even supposed to answer.4 -
I just bought the game screeps (http://screeps.com) and am gonna use typescript. Should I or should I not add this on my CV as side project?5
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Every bad recruiter ever...
---
Hello {name},
I recently came across your CV and {empty compliment}.
Would you be interested in me making 20-40% commission on your yearly salary for doing next to nothing other than make you miserable in 3-6 months time by promising the world and delivering nothing?.
Look forward to making money off you...
{recruiter},
Super Mega Uber Extreme Ltd.
---
Seriously, fuck bad recruiters... -
Which is worse?
- Staying at a company you helped build because you have an emotional attachment to it, even if it's not as good to work for now, people are leaving every week and pay is under market rate.
- Leaving a company you helped build purely for more money and a big name on your CV.
Follow the money or follow your heart?
(Image slightly relevant?)
10 -
I've been given an intern to help me with my work (lol it's not helping) and she knows almost nothing of web dev, not even what Nodejs is, I had to explain it and guide her step by step on how to install it on her laptop. On her CV it says she has JavaScript experience, but she cannot even put together a basic HTML page, she asked me what a div is. As far as I know, HTML, CSS and JS are pieces of the same pie and you cannot really work with JS unless you also work with HTML and CSS. I think she lied on her CV and I need to tell my manager.
My question is, is it normal to know JavaScript and not know much about HTML and CSS?10 -
Hey devs,
I'm really bad at personal project idea generation.
So, do you have any good Python project ideas?
PS. Wanna light up my github chart again.
(aaand to put it in my CV of course)
4 -
After growing problems at work with basically being nothing more than an office junior who gets used to manually input data, with the occasional bits of development.
I sent my CV to a company one of my friends works for applying for a role as a full stack graduate developer.
I have a telephone interview tomorrow, little bit nervous8 -
Last month I asked my boss for some task to work on. He told me to stick to reading tutorials and wait just a day or two for the tasks.
Month just passed and no programming tasks arrived.
Should I change job?
Yesterday made quite nice looking CV.14 -
It feels like recruiters do not even bother taking a look at your cv, "the third page", your website and your gitlab projects.
Why is that?7 -
Guys, I'm wondering what do you put in your CVs.
Do you only mention what you master?
Do you mention things you only worked with once?
Do you mention things you only have theoretical knowledge about?
Do you mention mainstream skills ( HTML/CSS) that almost developer knows?
Please, I'm struggling.5 -
When leaving for the day on my last day in the company.
I thought what I learned here? nothing technical except how to survive the politics, backstabber, betrayal, blame game and getting used.
I wish it could be added as skills in CV.2 -
!rant && anxiousness
So, I applied for several jobs because I started hating my current job and the boss.
On my CV and motivation letter I really only wrote stuff I am confident enough with to show if someone would ask me.
I only have 2.5 years of work experience and a B.Sc.
In 3 days I already got 2 answers out of 3 companys, I applied at, who would like to meet me.
Tomorrow is the first meeting.
Now I am anxious that I might still not live up to my CV or motivation letter although I know that I use the techniques mentioned there daily.
I fear that I might be not as good as they might think now, even feel like I know nothing at all.
I never really believed I would fall in the imposter syndrome trap, but here it is.
Any advice? I really want to find another job and I don't want to screw up the interview because I am too nervous.4 -
i built a script to auto-update my cv and republish every time i visit a website that mentions a technology not currently on my resume.3
-
I got a PDF job description from a recruiter which has an invisible paragraph
> How to Apply
> Please send CV to opportunities@acme.com referring to the Integration Developer role.
acme being stand-in for the employer of course (_not_ the recruiter)
What does this even mean?9 -
Fuck all of these recruiters who says that I am right for the job but after sending a CV and my hourly rate, the application is dead in the water.
So, I am not the right one to do the job, why do you fucking dare to say that in the first place? Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!4 -
We're hiring contract developers at my office. Just leafing though someone's CV before an interview and noticed it was 10 pages long! That's been a record so far but to be honest so many have been 4-6 pages long. What happened to keeping things succinct and relevant!?10
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After they look into your CV .. ask to look into their repo ! See what type of spaghetti they are cocking !10
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Have no words. Just got an email from a recruiter for a 6 months contract in a vendor company for a position....the final customer will be my current employer where I am already working as a full time employee. No mistakes because it is a very specific role.
At least please read the CV when you have one!2 -
I forgot how much effort job applications were. Like, just writing a cv is a lot of effort, then some companies want a cv and then answer some interview style questions too 🙄3
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Oh that looks pretty let me try.
Ow God why !!
....
Ah....that makes sense
Obsess over it for months
Make failed side projects with it.
Ad to cv -
I regret not finishing all the personal projects I started. Then I would have had at least something I could have put on my CV and gotten a job earlier than at 23.
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Our cv teacher at school basically just printed out selfhtml.org on paper and told us to start writing websites. He then went on to chill on his chair for the rest of the lesson.3
-
Was once interviewing for Ops support roles looking after multiple websites wrote in java, rails, php with some rest apis, apache, varnish and more....
We were also starting moving towards automation and devops practices so we needed to expand...
We have a great CV from someone who had all of the technologies and chef mentioned on their CV so we were positive....
Invited to interview and something wasn't right..... I dropped a "so you mentioned a few different languages on your CV, can you talk me though some of the applications you've looked after and what languages they were written in, etc?"
His reply.. "yes I looked after a lot of applications and helped people with them in English"
Me "oh.. Okay.... So those apps which software languages were they... You mentioned things like Java and Php and automation tech like chef?"
Him "well yes they were all sorts of things but I predominantly looked after the apps that were wrote in English... Didn't deal with any wrote in java or chef... Just English"
Me ".... Does anyone else have any questions?"
Safe to say we didn't offer him the job.... -
Why does it take 3 interview stages to get a 3-month internship...
That's ignoring the personalised CV, resume and cover letter for each one as well.
Can't imagine the fun of getting an actual job!!8 -
I guess all of you know udemy.
Can anyone tell me whether HR actually gives any shit about "I finished an udemy class"-certificates?
I like udemy. To get into a new language or something like that it's pretty cool (if you are ok with paying for things you can find on google, too). But somehow i don't trust their certificates. Do they make you look like a fool if you put them in your cv? Or is it a prove of "see how engaged I am"?4 -
I sent a recruiter my CV as a PDF file. They replied that they need it as a Word document. They must be joking, right? I always use my website's reader view to generate an updated CV by saving it as a PDF which contains text and images in accessible format. So it can't be hard to convert to Word?
I just installed Microsoft Edge on Linux, because I heard that Edge can save websites as Word documents. It can't. At least not on Linux, using the print or the save as dialog.
I don't even know what to tag this rant. Those people must be making fun of me. What are they supposed to do with a fucking Microsoft Word document? Make sure that the layout gets broken and the content truncated when forwarding it internally?9 -
Is it coincidental that the two most important keys that help us devs build our CVs, the C and V keys are inline on our keyboards? And look at that Ctrl key...That's what happens after too many rounds of copying and pasting...All hail Ctrl, C and V keys
1 -
I left my previous job being disgruntled over insane hours and being underpayed.
Took a 3 month break, whilst shotgun blasting my CV and Resume at places. A few stuck. I chose the one that had the best passion to pay ratio. -
I've got a question for everyone.
I'm revamping my CV and I was thinking of lightening it a bit, but I'm not very experienced with CV's.
At my last development job, we would order breakfast cobs every Friday, and I would sort all the change out and order it etc.
Would it be wrong to add this to the end of my job history?4 -
As someone who often interviews devs, I can say you should be honest about your abilities. Just because you tweaked someone's Python code doesn't mean you are a Python expert. Stick to the facts on your resume/cv. Also, have a good code portfolio. That shows the interviewer much more than a degree does.4
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Took a major blow to the confidence today. Had a call with FanDuel for a devops position. By the end of the call we both knew I didn't have the experience for it. I expected that. I asked to be considered for a Java position and she was less than enthusiastic based on my CV (resume). I've been a Java dev for 4 years :(
Ah well, just need to shake it off and move on!7 -
In my project to process CSV file it needs to be transformed into XML file. Basically 100 MB CSV is turned into 3GB XML. They can be deleted afterward but it is not implemented and no one cares. Our storage gains around 1-2 TB data each month. Right now we have ~200 TB of XML in our s3
I think I can add Big Data to my CV *sarcasm*5 -
Finally I have something decent for my résumé.
I was going through some LaTeX hell before someone started a cv tools discussion. It was good to learn that json cv is a thing. But it was too late for me. LaTeX posed a challenge and I was bored. It became personal.
After a lot of kicking around and landing on XeLaTeX, I finally have a decent layout. I had to compromise a tiny bit but that's on me for having little content.
(I wanted a graphic résumé but I'll need to do more to sufficiently fill a page. Besides I'd need to design icons and shit for it.)
Now it's done and my job hunt can start!3 -
Once upon a time, I'm in the process of going to a new job. But in the middle of the recruitment process, it turns out I don't like that company, for reasons I didn't know before.
Anyone have a good idea how to escape this pit?
*My CV has been thrown there6 -
Fucking linux foundation, bought the CKA exam last year and now they tell you if you take the exam after first of April the cert will only last 2 years instead of 3, wtf is this shit?
God certs are such a fucking scam! yet they are quite valuable if you have them on your cv so you just have to suffer in silence.6 -
From those of you who are already working fulltime/have experience with applying for jobs. I am currently writing my CV and I am not sure how I can mention my programming knowledge in an adequate way. I have 7 years of C# Knowledge, started of with VB.NET before. 2 years with python, C++ Knowledge ~3 years, basic experience with Delphi, html.. How did you mention this in your cv? By years of experience or different?10
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Tried learning a new language to add to my CV, guess I haven't got it in me.
Fluent in google translate will have to do for now.2 -
Hello ranters, I need some help because I want to make a portfolio for my curriculum vitæ and my experiences but I don't know if I should use a framework for this kind of little project.8
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When it comes to job hunt, i feel so bad.
Specially when i apply through angels.co
Like wait a second before you reject my CV or my application just talk to me.
Take a look on my projects, my will to do, my interest.
Damn i feel so desperate sometimes i feel like they are not real job vacancies just someone messing around.20 -
It's the first time since I finished high school (2 years ago) that I get to review my CV. I included as one of my features that I liked to write "optimized code" and just realized how wrong that is. Those where the times when I had little to no experience at all and would spend unreasonable amount of time to write programs with the fewest lines possible (I loved python because its one-line capability).
I think it's time to rewrite that CV.2 -
Today I found a vulnerability in an local agency website. It's one of the famous and biggest that if I would applied they wouldn't even look at my cv. Long story short, I managed to login to their admin dashboard and sent a screenshot of it as a twitter mention to them. All they did was to like the tweet while I had the chance to fuck up the website.5
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Head hunters reaching out with a "position that might intrest you".. with a stack of skills that are not on my CV at aaaaall
Also Headhunters after answering back: oh you have only 1 year experience with that tool? They want at least 3, goodbye.
All just a phishing scam to get u to give them an updated CV version.. no real "relevant position" in sight. Smh.3 -
Update for https://devrant.com/rants/1224004/...
and... it doesn't work!
THEY CAN'T READ THE VERY FIRST LINE OF MY LINKEDIN CV! IT SAYS:
"I am not interested in new job opportunities. Don't insist!"
WHICH WORD OF THIS FUCKING SIMPLE SENTENCE DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?!?!??!2 -
This one is from experience:
>always update your CV,
>don't lose hope,
>learn what you stumbled against and
>most importantly- "ABH (Always Be Hunting)" -
Just finished my first microservice project. I'm so happy that I was able to do that hardest thing I ever did. It's just a side project but I think it will do well on my cv as I will be finishing university next year.
Just wanted to share this with you guys as all the rants really helped me to calm down when I was wrecking my head over some weird bugs.4 -
Err. Any web developers or recruitment people able to please give me feedback on my resume?
I'd greatly appreciate the help 😭24 -
Hey I want to ask some react project suggestion that are good for interview as an experienced web developer. I don't want to build calculator :(
Mine list is
ToDo App
Expense Splitter App
CV Management App
ANy Thing else will be welcomed7 -
what we call when a person uses some technology in the project just to make sure his profile/cv gets updated...1
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My company wanted to move old desktop applications to web and use angularJS. Finally, "new" tech. Not allowed to use node and Mongo because maybe someone who joins the Web team don't know Javascript and only sql experience ... Time to dust off my CV1
-
A recruiter contacted me asking my curriculum (sent), then he sent me some emails before calling me. After some minutes, he said I was not good for the position. But that thing was written on the first line of my cv. Maybe he is not good to read.
Please stop wasting my and your time.4 -
What software do you guys use to make your CVs? I've been using ViusalCV but I'm looking for another alternatives. Do you just use MS Word or other word processing program?3
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this.post != rant
Just had my first job interview for backend dev position. Hopefully, it went well. Not that much technical questions but the interviewer sure did verified all the things I wrote on my cv. Good thing I included my side projects, that way we have a topic to talk about. Hope ill get the offer. Yaaaaas!!! -
So, just had an interview for a junior position at a company but as a QA engineer.
I would've preferred to apply to a more dev kinda job but I gotta eat. Apparently they liked my CV and the job doesn't sound so bad, any QA engineer with some advice or tips of what to expect if I get the job?3 -
There is a job fair coming up next week and while i dont really want to find a new job, i thought this would be a good excuse to update my cv a bit.
My question is, do you have any templates/frameworks/anything you usually use for stuff like this? I always throw together some bootstrap page but i want to learn something new.1 -
"Hello. My name is [...] and I'm working for ONE OF THE LEADING COMPANIES IN THE [gibberish]. I see that you have experience in Java and C#. We are looking for people like you for a JavaScript Dev position. If you are interested, please send you CV [...]"
HOW ABOUT QUACK OFF AND DO SOME RESEARCH BEFORE CONTACTING PEOPLE!? -
Spent half a day creating my CV, some time ago and today it was time to upload it to my site.
Unfortunately, swapped the first and second arguments of the tar command, so the CV file got overwritten with the tarball...
After about ten minutes of panicked searching in my browser cache, I realised that the jetbrains IDEs have local history 😀
So I did not lose half a day's work after all 😃 -
do you have a CV driven software engineer(s) in your team/squad?
if yes, how do you deal with their dramatic changes in codebase every quarter?13 -
Is looking for the string "cv" too much for a folder with 962 files and 116 folders having a total of 753MB?
Apparently, it is for the Windows Explorer.
Come on...8 -
PSA: start writing a cover letter, a resume, a references list and a CV now! Doesn’t matter if you are perfectly happy in your job! By the time something comes up it will be too late or something will prevent you from making it as good as it could be! These things take forever to write well!
This is has been especially tough for me as all my previous jobs have been the type that they were surprised to see I had a resume. Compiling years of professional experience into a decent looking document was a whole other rodeo. And now jobs are looking for CV’s which is a whole other other rodeo.5 -
Speciality: Conversational interfaces / NLP
Why I chose it: It appeared to be the only area where my previous academic background (Law) was relevant, so they didn't consider me to have 7 years of blank on my CV.2 -
Wanna know what I love being able to do now?
Reply to bullshit recruiter emails and basically follow the script:
- Here's my skills
- Here's my availability
- Here's my rate
- Here's my CV
Oh, and BTW, I trade through my own limited company, so stick that up your various orifices you ratchet-fucking moron emailing me about roles that are literally nowhere near related to my publicly available info... -
I think I'm a dev.... sigh.
After I quit I didn't do it but out of all my interests and hobbies this one kept bugging me. So yeahhhhhh. I'm a dev.
Speaking of. Got bored and finally made a portfolio website. It's not great but people were asking for a link to my cV. So let me know what you think and I can get around to adjusting.
It's
Www.almxnames.com21 -
Fellow ML professionals and enthusiasts alike:
What do you all think about the Jetson Nano? Have you read or seen anything about it? Does it tickle your interest?
I am looking into it at the moment :D let me know what you all think!2 -
Working in an expanding business is mostly fun, can be kind of challenging (for those who don't like to step in and do what's needed). One thing in particular you need to do a lot - is interviews. Lot's of them.
There are alsways two sides of the coin, for sure. But, just a little tip/hint to everyone looking for a job - please, please, please make sure your CV and letter at least makes sense for the position you're trying to get.
This (screenshot) is just one example of things in a CV which really makes me want to shout and kick people out.
It's part of the front page of a CV, for someone who is looking for a position as front-end developer / UX specialist. This person claims to be very interested in UX, and has done wome work already in this field.
Can ANYONE explain to med WHAT THE F*CK this actually means?
1) How many stars can a row have? 10, 6, 8?
2) What does it mean to have 4 starss in PHP knowledge? What's lacking to get 5?
3) What's the scale based on, at all?
And you want me to hire to to do UX of loyalty communication (e-mail, mobile apps, websites/landing pages) for our customers - who in turn have millions of customers/prospects?!?
ARE YOU F*CKING KIDDING ME?
If you can't even make a visualization of your _own_ knowledge which can be interpreted into some sort of competence matrix, but you just use something you think looks cool... Damn, you could at least have tried.
1 -
Applying for graduate software developer roles and it really pisses me off that most of these applications require you to first upload your CV and then ask you to create a CV on their website again. What the fuck? The only thing you need to evaluate me is my CV and my github link. I don't want to fill in a 1 hour fucking long form. It doesn't make any sense.1
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Today a recruiter messaged me on Facebook. Week ago, I left a post with my CV on a programming group-currently I'm looking for a junior JAVASCRIPT (important ! ) /Node.js position, explicitly said so.
R(ecruiter): "Hello sir, we noticed your post with CV on group XYZ, are you still looking for a job?"
Me: "Yes, of course."
R: "We are building a new team in city X, remote work is possible. I will send you job posting right away."
Started reading it, job title is SENIOR JAVA DEVELOPER. Okay, maybe she sent me wrong document, maybe she wanted me to read just a bit about company and every job posting is pretty generic.
Me:" This job posting is for a senior programmer, I take it you're looking for juniors too ? I would happily take it, it's just I want a job to learn more things. Did you read my CV?"
R, annoyed: "Requirements for this position are quite clear, I believe. We are open to working with people with different experience level."
From there, she was pretty negative but I remained sympathetic and agreed to met with her boss next week. After all, maybe he has a position for me.
"Java and Javascript are similar like Car and Carpet are similar" -
Write every dev project (even the smallest ones) you have ever done on your CV. I once used an obscure Python module in a really small project, but they desperately needed someone w/ experience with it. It was the reason I got that job.2
-
Not an interview question but their logic:
On my first and only interview so far, i've apllied for a job in digitization department in our city library. They saw in my CV that i had some knowledge of digital electronics, so they've connected the dots and realized that that makes me perfect for the digitization work
There is absolutely nothing similar between those fields.
Moral of the story: take all the classes kids, you never know...1 -
At the top of my current CV (the only one with current contact details on it) is the line "I am only looking for remote working roles" in bold. Why is it that over 90% of recruiters who contact me want to place me in a role where I would have to commute to an office, mostly over an hour's drive each way? Then they wonder how they get a bad reputation? FML!4
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We should start giving devRant profile link in Resume/CV lmao.
Hope that will be a new trend haha.6 -
Is it normal that you share code on github for a commercial app you have made? Or someone might steal it right? I want to use it as a show off in my Cv
New to github here17 -
My countries {South Africa} new favourite thing, you get a mail from a reqcruiter stating they have an opportunity for you and want you to forward your CV in Word format.
Dunno about you countries, but in mine 'word' is code for 'make it easier for use to fuck it up with the template we stole from the dogs shit after it ate its owners homework'.
So I rpelied ot one of them simply asking if I should not first be interestd in the position before them requesting my CV.
They basically typed out a longer version of the original mail, I still do not know what this great opportunity is that they want my CV for and not replying again. lol5 -
Someone asked about CVs, and I found this https://resumonk.com/blog/...
Disclaimer: I use (pay for) Resumonk.4 -
I reached a new level of desperate
where i am replying to rejection emails
And wish my resume be considered for the next available job opportunities.
So sad and so bad3 -
It looked nice on my CV ... Hmmmm actually the only useful thing was learning how to design a system.
Programming is matter of practice...
Designing however you need some educational background.. see some amazing programmers with equally horrible designing skills ..! -
I wonder if anyone ever put something like brainfuck, huh? , small or anything similar in their CV alongside something useful, and got hired by the sheer absurdity of it.
-
To stay a dev (can do the role with my eyes closed) or take on the architecture role for this company that is sinking like the titanic.
Don’t bother with the hassle (don’t need more money tbh & don’t even know what the money is)?
Take the opportunity while it’s there and get it on my cv?
🤷♂️
#question4 -
Sent a CV for a full-stack C# role. The CV is mainly a mix of working in ASMX/WCF, SQL, SSRS, SSIS, Distributed transaction architectures then with about 40% ASP.NET focusing on server side but also with some client side technologies and that I sometimes use Illustrator for creating/manipulating SVGs.
Was told I am too "front-end"2 -
People nowadays.
Searched for JS/NodeJs frameworks.
Read the Docs for a couple of minutes and run some examples.
*Opens* CV / Linkedin to update Skillset.
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So with the count of JS/Nodejs Frameworks, they probably have lots skills listed in their CV.2 -
Fuck.
I've just seen work offer in my city for junior unity developer. I'd love to work as a game dev (and currently am finishing my first "real" game in this engine) but I feel too anxious to send my CV.
Also for some weird reason I feel attachment and loyalty to my current employer, even though I'm more often pissed about working there than not. Stockholm Syndrome?3 -
Started an apprenticeship almost seven months ago now, don’t get me wrong I enjoy it a lot, but everything I already knew in regards to programming was self taught, so finding a normal paying job was proving to be difficult, I took this apprenticeship then boom, ever since I started, I’ve had recruiters and companies ringing me for jobs??? On the upside I get more qualifications to put on my CV when I complete the apprenticeship and my company is paying for me to do A-Level maths!
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Can someone plz give me a title on my CV as an Xcode developer, just completed the first 30 pages of headfirst😂
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Finally, after a long time and excuses....
updated my profile on job portals...
Ready to study ..... Best is waiting.... -
We have a notorious question in one of our coding interviews, designed to weed out people who've slapped 'Postgres' on their CV (because that's what we're looking for) when what they really mean is "I've used MySQL a lot, and it's basically the same, right?". People get choked on that about 70% of the time.
If you put something technical on your CV, be prepared to be tested on it in a coding interview!1 -
Guys I have to write a CV for school as homework(yep), could you make me one or tell me cool stuff to add to make me look like a super duper crazy programmer?5
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I don't describe what I did in my CV for any of my current or past job(s). Any tips to end that bad practice?
I'm looking to switch jobs for a larger pay (around 35% to 81% more)5 -
A month ago, I spent a lot of time on looking for different types of CV/resume to find the one fits my needs. The problem with overleaf was that there many pages and too duplicate templates with minor changes.
So I tried to create a list of them with previews to quickly pick the best. don't forget to star if you want to update yours in future :
https://github.com/sadransh/...
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Take the time to do a little research into the company, then tailor your CV to the company and the position. Don't be afraid to add a little pizzazz, but also don't lie... There's a difference between something that's a little misleading and an outright false claim.
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So I’m setting up my personal site using GitHub pages with a custom url.
Aside from obvious stuff like a portfolio etc what should I be including?
A full cv/resume or something less formal. It’s also going to have a bit of a blog type thing going on3 -
Spend few days to make reasonable profile on angel.co to get some job. After few months and hundreds of applies only few shitty responses for free work. Probably all recruiters are US based and see I'm from Europe so my e-cv goes right to e-shredder instantly. FML.
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Am I reasonable rejecting a job which is about building an accounts interface system which will interface with different services build with different technologies and manage the accounts, all in Visual Basic?
On my side I don't feel pleasant to put effort and will on such a language on my CV.8 -
I spent half an hour writting all my studies down in a job looking site in order to apply for a job (apparently, a CV isn't enough), and when finally everything is done, apparently you need to PAY for premium in order to apply for certain jobs in that site? Are they actually serious?2
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Has anyone had to start undergraduate/transfer studies a little bit late? Need help with CV/Resume.
So, I dropped out of University because I had to move to USA. And now I am applying for University here in Massachusetts. (transfer my studies to be precise)
I have worked since 2014 as a developer (currently working) and I want to know how to structure my CV/Resume for University.
Do I need a simple one just like when I apply for a job, or a detailed one 2-3 pages?
Thinking of applying at Boston University, Northeastern & UMass. -
Do people put their OSS projects on their CV? I'm trying to put together a decent graduate CV and the non-tech people around me insist that I should put "the research projects I spend so much time on" on it, but I'm pretty sure that as long as there's a Github link the rows full of jargon combined with meaningless names that would be a project list do more harm than good.3
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Hey guys I've to make my CV/RESUME. Can you guys help me through it? I made couple of it but I didn't like any. I think I need to see some real CV/RESUME.2
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what do you guys think of rating your skills in cv as a graph?
like sql - 7.5 etc...?
i've just tried it and sent my resume to a couple employers but i'm not getting the usual response (more activity).
i also did a very honest review of my skills (according to 3 senior colleagues), so maybe the scores seem too low? how would you react if you saw someone with rather low scores? i'm asking this because developers and mortals probably view these scores very differently. Maybe some suggestions?4 -
Recruiter message: Do you want to get an extra 50£ for Christmas? Get me in contact with one of your friends fitting this job description...
I DID NOT APPLY FOR A FUCKING RECRUITER POSITION! Either do your fucking job and forward my CV to a relevant employer or if my skills are too worthless for your Olympian standards STOP BOTHERING ME. -
Is having a CV history of job hopping within a year the standard? Are you still getting great job offers?
I'm aiming to spend another 2 years in my company just because the flexibility and work pacing is good, but need to know if job tenure is a big deal or not and start chasing more competitive salaries.5 -
Total personal rebranding, mark zuck T-shirts, total CV changeover (change the weird perl & haskell skills, to javascript) you know cool kid stuff.
wish you all luck, am about to become rich, watch out.6 -
Should I apply to a job that I am clearly underqualified? For example, I learned a bit about embedded software as a hobby but job requires extensive experience. So the result is certain but can any good come from this interview?
More detail, I will be indirectly applying for the job through recruiter company. My CV and interview with recruiter was also honest about my experience. In fact, recruiter asks if I am interested.9 -
Senior Recruiters: Are GCP accreditations worth it? I’m looking to take the Professional Cloud Developer course.
Do they give weight on a CV?9 -
I've been applying to jobs in Canada while living in the UK. I'm employed here and trying to move, I'm also a UK national. However, my CV is instantly getting rejected by all companies. I'm not sure if my CV sucks or I should be doing some other step before applying for jobs in Canada from abroad. Am I missing something obvious and being quite dumb here?3
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!Rant
I am dev working on data warehousing. Want to switch to autonomous vehicle industry as a vision engineer.
How to start ?
PS: I did projects on CV during my BE days(2016) and won a gold medal in that. -
Why can't recruiters tell I don't want to play. I've confused myself with my own code and now you're yapping in my ear about candidates wanting to join the company. Go away. Email recruitment@ with a CV. I don't wanna speak to you.
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What is your opinion of having a LinkedIn profile with such details? Will it help or will it hurt? For me, I think it's too much.
https://linkedin.com/in/...
Please remain civil and no troll attacks.3 -
Topic: self promotion to get a job as developer in the tech
- CV short with bullet points or include also a brief description of experiences, skills in action and personal attitudes?
- Website? GitHub page? Suggestions about what highlight in personal git repos?
- Other things that could help to let you be noted in the pre-screening process of the recruiters?3 -
The recruiter just asked me to send over an updated CV. I'm filling in the tasks and responsibilities of my recent roles and trying to balance the daily bullshit with actual achievements. How should I word it?1
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If you know a language and would be able to use it in a professional setting but really don't want to, should you still put it on your cv to show the experience you have?1
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I need a CV for a small non important side job. Do i need a fancy shmancy CV or can i go with just the most important informations propely formated in a simple word document? I think simplicity is crutial. I have pretty high qualifications so they should hire me for that if nobodt better arrives.8
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Luxary dilemma. I'm just finishing up my studies and got 2 job openings going on. They are about the same salary but very different companies. What should i think about for my future like CV and other stuff? What would benefit me the most knowledge wise. Or any other recomendations starting as a developer?
Opening 1:
Smaller company "10-15 people" that develops apps and plugins for CRM systems. C# fullstack.
Opening 2:
Big player in the car industry with 1000+ employees. Java backend.
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