I applied to Amazon recently not really thinking about it I was just bored. Dropped my CV and I was asked to fill in why would I want to work in that position. I un-ironically put “It sounds like a lot of fun”, got rejected instantly then got an unrelated message from an Amazon recruiter from another division inviting me to apply, rejected it because it didn’t sound as fun.

I’m an honest bloke I just want to have fun.

Got a CV Today and the guy literally listed one of his skills as 'Googling'

We're interviewing him

If you’re having trouble with the bossman’s ‘tude
He’s giving you the blues
You wanna dev, but not for this dude
Here’s what you gotta do:
Pull up the CV, it’s that easy
Send it every time

Just use a throw-away email, hey.

Intern's CV says they have technical skills with MS Office, MySQL and JavaScript. Last month I let my manager know that this intern doesn't really know anything, so we let her do a Freecodecamp course, after which she still cannot build a basic HTML and CSS page and doesn't understand the relationship between HTML and CSS.

My manager bought her a Laravel course for beginners and today I discovered that she also doesn't understand databases, because she tried to enter an alphabetic character into a column that only accepts integers. She doesn't read/understand the error codes thrown by the application.

She tried to access a route which she created in her Laravel app by accessing it via the phpmyadmin dashboard and called me and wasted my time by asking me why her route isn't working. She literally does not understand how computers work, or how the HTTP protocol works, even less so how a file structure works. She cannot translate abstractions to practical solutions.

She either deliberately lied on her CV to get a job, or she's just really dumb and doesn't understand what the term "technical skills" mean.

I've told my manager multiple times how I think she's in the wrong job, but they keep pushing things beyond her capabilities onto her desk. I was told I'd get an intern to help me with my work load, but I got signed up into an experiment I did not consent to (manager's words, it's an experiment to help uplift people with bad degrees and a poor background). I am not a good teacher, I hate doing it.

* Recruiter says he has a nice proposition

* I say that I'm not comfortable switching jobs yet, but I'd be up for a short phone interview to hear him out, out of pure interest

* Recruiter explains a lot about the company, and then asks if I am up for "a short Teams introduction with the team lead to hear more"

* I say yes, though still stating that I do not intend on switching, but want to know more in case of a future possibility

* Recruiter says I need to send my full CV / Resumé plus grades from every school I ever intended (including the early ones that doesn't even matter)

* I say no since 1) I'd have to dig them out from the basement, 2) I am not looking for a job right now, and 3) This request is absurd to me, and NOT a norm in my part of the world when I am not applying.

* He says I HAVE to, since I could be lying
(I am mostly self-taught and have very little actual education, so this logic made NO sense to me)

* I continue to say no, stating that it's simply not worth the time finding the old grades in the basement for a job I will not be taking, and that I am mostly self-taught so grades wouldn't matter

* He starts getting angry, accusing me of "purposefully wasting his time", and says he'll warn the company about me.

Fair point. I'll warn my contacts about you then. Have a nice day, you f*cking prick :)

You cant write that you have used Linux on your CV just because you are using WSL

I can't figure out shit..
To be honest I created this profile just so I can write down somewhere what I am going through.
So, once upon a time I had graduated from college and went right into a corporate (has only been 2 years since). I was fortunate enough that I got assigned a project that was just starting, and even though I had no clue what was going on, I started doing whatever was assigned.
I initially worked in java and then finished all my tasks earlier than expected, so they switched me to another C++ project that builds on top of it.
Fast forward 2.5 years, I'm now the team lead of the CPP project and all my friends who were in the core team have left the company.
As usual, the reason behind it is shitty management. These mfs won't hire competent people and WILL ABSOLUTELY NOT retain the ones that are. I can feel it in my bones that it is time for me to leave, but fuck me if I understand what I am good at.
I have been able to handle all the tasks that they threw at me, be it java or c++ - just because I love logic and algorithms. I have been dabbling in ML and AI since 4-5 years now, but could never go into it full time.
Now I'm looking at the job postings and Jesus Christ these bitches do not understand what they want. I have to be expert in 34567389 technologies, mastering each of whom (by mastering I mean become proficient in) would need at least 6-8 months if not more, all with 82146867+ years of experience in them.
I don't know if I am supposed to learn on Java (so spring boot and stuff) or I'm supposed to do c++ or I'm gonna go with Python or should I learn web dev or database management or what.
I like all of these things, and would likely enjoy working in each of these, but for fucks sake my cv doesn't show this and most of the bitch ass recruiter portals keep putting my cv in the bin.
Yeah...
If you have read so far, here's a picture of a cat and a dog.

it wasn't even an interview, they were just glad my cv wasn't absolute garbage, it was basically an introduction and welcome to the team. the only question i remember being asked was wether i preferred FE or BE (which was pointless, because i ended up helping with full stack)

Not the worst, but probably the only one I can sort of explain & not get into trouble for NDA breach..

Umm.. here it goes.. wrong id returned from db procedure, tried to do something on db with that id and got exception that the id doesn't exist. Instead of checking why the procedure returns nonexistent id, he just wrapped everything in try catch without any logs.. & of course, didn't tell anyone about this.. o.0

I know, I know, code review could have prevented this, but holy fuck..
Guy's cv had more experience than I have now, so at the time, I didn't think I'd have to check every line of code he wrote, especially not for shit like this.

Isn't it nice when a recruiter actually reads your CV before calling you?

!rant

Today is a happy day.

I just got a job to finance my last year of studies as a frontend dev for two months this summer.

I'll be working as an intern and won't get paid much, but it's still tremendously more than I would've ever made with any other shitty student job.

Best thing is that my best friend works at the same company and we'll be seated next to each other (he also convinced the HR to invite me to the interview, woul've been rejected right away without him).

So basically I am a lucky bastard and they even told me that if I'm doing well they wouldn't hesitate to hire me after my studies if I'd still be interested in a year ❤️

What I'm missing most as a student is to work in front of a computer 8 hours a day. This will be a welcome change and a nice addition to my CV.

Wish me luck! Starting right after my final exams on the 16th 😎

So,

A) I suck at digital drawing.
B) They have not invited me to the third interview like they said they would in the second interview.
C) I am still working on the PhD application. Still think the CV is bad, the SOP sucks, and back and forth emailing professors about recommendation letters. I am not built for this, but who is. So out of comfort zone. So unrelated to actual research or brain capabilities.
D) Moving in with parents is all fun and games and "I can do this", until you get stuck inside with them for over a month because of lockdowns.

... I hope next year is going to be better...

The nice thing with working in IT, is that I dont need to have a CV in order to get a new job.

!dev
This thing is eating away at me so just shut up and listen.

I have started applying for this uni for PhD (don't judge me) and for that, I will need recommendation letters, right? So I emailed two of the people who have already agreed to write me recommendation letters, to confirm the details that I'll give the said uni to contact them. Emails were sent out on Thursday. It's now soon to be Tuesday and I haven't heard a thing back. And this is abso-fucking-lutely killing me!!!! (There's still another to be emailed but he's a bit high and mighty and I'll email him after I get feedbacks from these two about my motivation letter and CV.)

Like, when you know my whole future depends on a single email of yours, saying that I'm a good PhD candidate (and oh boy, that is a joke; considering that I'm applying for literally one of the best unis in this particular subject in the whole world... I'm well over my head, aren't I?) why would you keep me standing on one leg just to confirm your contact details? I mean I know I'm overreacting a bit considering the deadline is yonks away, but still, urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

A long long time ago ( 2007 I think ) I worked for a company that made landing sites, so basically an email campaign would go out, users would be sent to a 1 page website with a form to capture their data, ready to be spammed even more. You know how it was back then.

So I worked with a guy who we had just hired, I didn't do the hiring but his CV checked out, so I gave him one of my tasks. Now most pages were made with js and html, with a PHP backend ( called with Ajax). Now this guy didn't know PHP so I was like all good, ASP works too at the end of the day we don't judge, we do like 2 or 3 of these a day and never look at them again. So he goes of and does is thing.

3 weeks later, the customer calls up to me they still haven't received their landing page. Ok so he probably forgot to email the customer np, I tell him to double check he has emailed the customer. Another week goes by end the customer calls back, same problem. At this point I'm getting worried, because we're days away from the deadline and it was originally my task.

So I go back to the guy and I tell him I want that landing page so I can send it myself, half thinking to myself that we had a freeloader, that guy that comes in to companies for 3 weeks, doesn't work, but still cashes his pay. But no, this was much worse.

So he tells me he has finished yet. I ask him why, what's the blocker ? You had 4 weeks to tell me you were blocked and couldn't progress. And his answer was simply, because I wasn't blocked I have been working on it this whole time. So I tell him to zip his project up and email it to me. We didn't do SVN or git back then, simply wasn't worth it. So he comes back to me and says the email server is telling him attachments can't be bigger then 50mb. At this point I'm thinking he didn't properly sized the art or something, so I give him a flash drive to put it on.

When I then open the flash drive, the archive is 300mb, thinking to myself, the images weren't even that big to begin with.
So I open it up, and I don't even find any images, just a single asp page. About 500mb. When I opened that up and it finally loaded, I saw the most horrendous things ever.

The first 500 lines was just initializing empty vars. Then there was some code that created an empty form with an onChange event that submits the form. After that.. it was just non stop nested if's. No loops, no while, for, foreach, NO elseif's, just nested if's, for every possible combination of the state the form could be in. Abou 5000 of them, in a single file. To make matters worse, all the form ( and page ) layout was hardcoded in the if's. Includes inline css, base64 encoded images, nothing but as dynamic, based on the length of the form he changes the layout, added more background etc. He cut the images up for every possible size of the page and included them in the code.

I showed it to my boss, he fired the guy on the spot. I redid the work from scratch, in under 4 hours. Send it to the client. they had no ammends to make, happy as Larry. Whish I kept the code somewhere.

Morale of the story, allways do a coding test on interviews, even if small things just to sanity check.

If Java versions can coexist on a system
If all java versions have their own packages on the AUR
If you can change envvars in a launch script and be sure that all processes of the application will persist your settings
Then why THE FUCK do package maintainers keep announcing to change the default java version to install their package, rather than explicitly doing that by themselves? Fuck off, do you really think yours is the only package that needs a specific Java version? Do you think each and every user will write their own init script, or edit the PKGBUILD to include the new version as an envvar in the desktop file? This is why Arch has a bad name, and they're fucking right. If you don't have the time to put a single motherfucking diff in the motherfucking pkgbuild to specify the java version in the desktop file, then don't fucking maintain the package. I know there are too few maintainers, but pretending to maintain a package while doing fuckall is much worse than leaving it unmaintained on the AUR so the first person who has time can pick it up.

> phone rings during worktime hours
> "Yeah, I was contacting you on behalf of YADDAYADDA, I just found your CV in our database and I wanted to know if you were open to work for us"
Excuse me, how long ago did I submit my application?
> "Mmmmh... it says 2020"

What exactly am I even supposed to answer.

I've never been a frontend guy, I only could modify existing FE code and had some clues about how to write a hello-world using angular.

I've just refactored ~150 files in an Angular project, created half a dozen new modules and modularized lots of loose artefacts.

And after recompiling the project still works! And is now more maintainable!

I think I now can safely add "Angular" to my resume :)

P.S. Damn it, Angular is cool!!!

I've been given an intern to help me with my work (lol it's not helping) and she knows almost nothing of web dev, not even what Nodejs is, I had to explain it and guide her step by step on how to install it on her laptop. On her CV it says she has JavaScript experience, but she cannot even put together a basic HTML page, she asked me what a div is. As far as I know, HTML, CSS and JS are pieces of the same pie and you cannot really work with JS unless you also work with HTML and CSS. I think she lied on her CV and I need to tell my manager.

My question is, is it normal to know JavaScript and not know much about HTML and CSS?

Dude, filling in the " research interests" section in the CV is the hardest fucking part.

As a teacher myself, I will always advice young people to go to school. Though I imagine it differs on the quality of education in your country.

I live in the Netherlands and here it's quite good overall. It's no Ivy League and there are plenty of exceptions but overall any technical study here is a good study.

I also teach at a small school (220 software engineering students) so I actually know my students and what generally need to get ahead.

But my main reasons for actually doing a study instead of going the self-taught route:

1. You spend +/- 4 years in presence of peers that are more or less in the same life phase as you are. You will make friends for life.
2. Companies value a diploma. Good for you that you landed a job on your 19th. Just wait until your 25, wanna switch jobs and don't even get to the second round of any application process because your CV does not list a diploma. This might change in the future but not for the next 5-10 years.
3. You will learn foundational stuff about most thing IT-related. Some things you'll never use. Some thing you'll use unknowingly every single day
4. It teaches discipline without major impact on your life if you fail something. OK, you failed a course. So what? Take it next year and take the time to do a side-project or internship during your study delays. It will teach you some life lessons without it costing you a job or your life savings, and you get some extra time to learn as well!
5. Retirement age by the time you retire will be 75. There's plenty of time to work. Why not spend 4 years with peers in a relatively safe and fun environment first?

TL;DR - small schools are actually fun, attend one

I feel like it might be a tiny bit (not much) better among React developers, but I ended up within one of those enterprise Angular till death companies, and it seems like nobody would ever doubt their Typescript skills, yet nobody actually understands Typescript at all.

In theory, I love Typescript. But you can abuse it to a point where it's almost as painful to work with as normal JavaScript.

It's not that I'm a master of Typescript.
But while I feel like I'm the only one understanding the mental model behind Typescript and also get stuff like mapped types or why you might wanna replace your enums with as const assertions, the rest calls themselves Typescript developers in their CV, no doubt. But It's way to easy to write whatever Typescript, while it's not as easy to reel get the hang of it.

Recruiter: I just had a look through your skillset and experience and wow - I am impressed. Looks like you have worked with quite a few different languages and those 2 FAANG companies really stand out when looking through your CV. So let me tell you something.. rather than me going through the roles I had in mind for you, why don't you tell me what would be the next big thing for you?

Me: Well I've been looking into Blockchain for a few years now; specifically Solidity and Rust with web3 now. It'd be great to at least have some exposure to any of these.

Recruiter: Ah yes, these are definitely the next big things, however the roles I have here right now for Solidity, Rust or web3, require around 3 years of commercial experience. I have a lead Rust engineer role, however they need someone who has worked on NFT based projects extensively.

Me: Sounds like you have made a decision to send me to another Nodejs/React role, so what's with the big talk then?

Reading candidate CVs makes me feel way better about my CV

So, just had an interview for a junior position at a company but as a QA engineer.

I would've preferred to apply to a more dev kinda job but I gotta eat. Apparently they liked my CV and the job doesn't sound so bad, any QA engineer with some advice or tips of what to expect if I get the job?

To stay a dev (can do the role with my eyes closed) or take on the architecture role for this company that is sinking like the titanic.

Don’t bother with the hassle (don’t need more money tbh & don’t even know what the money is)?

Take the opportunity while it’s there and get it on my cv?

🤷‍♂️

#question

Working with dildos-for-brain people! I asked how to achieve something and if I got an answer it stated: never saw something like that implemented before (It really means that people here just copy/paste shit and use iterative development method until they nab the solution)!!!

Really? I just asked to have nested XML structure, it's been around since early 90'!

I have new weekend project - polish my CV and get the fuck out of here. When it feels like you are smartest in the room and for every question for help people just throw you random answers not related to question at all it is not worth staying there.

Also using outdated XML server CMS that ceased its support, documentation is shoddy and internet never heard of it - only relevant google search leads to the CMS website. Good luck! Good fucking luck!

This shit went overboard so many times and I decided that this is the last time. I have 2 more fucks to give and those are for me!

How much knowledge you should know to be able to say that "I know this programming language" on your resume or CV? for cpp, js

I don't describe what I did in my CV for any of my current or past job(s). Any tips to end that bad practice?

I'm looking to switch jobs for a larger pay (around 35% to 81% more)

Is having a CV history of job hopping within a year the standard? Are you still getting great job offers?

I'm aiming to spend another 2 years in my company just because the flexibility and work pacing is good, but need to know if job tenure is a big deal or not and start chasing more competitive salaries.

To convert to Resume

I am an asp.net dev who started working march - 2022.
I am the only dev in the team (CSD) from September - 2022(colleague gone on maternity leave).
Starting from January I have been training 2 freshers/intern.

Any ideas on how to convert this into resume points?

I've been applying to jobs in Canada while living in the UK. I'm employed here and trying to move, I'm also a UK national. However, my CV is instantly getting rejected by all companies. I'm not sure if my CV sucks or I should be doing some other step before applying for jobs in Canada from abroad. Am I missing something obvious and being quite dumb here?

Total personal rebranding, mark zuck T-shirts, total CV changeover (change the weird perl & haskell skills, to javascript) you know cool kid stuff.

wish you all luck, am about to become rich, watch out.

Senior Recruiters: Are GCP accreditations worth it? I’m looking to take the Professional Cloud Developer course.
Do they give weight on a CV?

I have hoed around in different technologies during my university life, Web dev, game dev, cybersecurity (even got a CEH certificate, the training wasn't adequate tho and it's an expensive field needing all those certs), tried blockchain, machine learning but at the end, I haven't gotten anything done. No big projects.... well, apart from a miniproject that extracts text from videos, doesn't work half the time (T-T), No internships...no experience, nothing. I was really, reaaally dumb xD

Now, in my 4th and final year of university , I have decided to settle on Web development (MERN) with game dev on the side (leisure activities), but I need advice.

Before deciding my path, I enrolled in the year-long ALX Software Engineering course. I'm in my 6th month. It promises access to The Room, where they say job opportunities that aren't shared publicly exist. Problem with the course, tho, is they rush, and I don't get time to consolidate what I learn in the course. I feel like i am not gaining anything (first few months were cool). I am on the verge of giving up cos I found solace in FullStackOpen. It teaches MERN, is self-paced, and ergo gives me time to build my portfolio and has a nice community. I know what to do (quit and focus on my portfolio and projects cos my CV is crap ), but advice from you all could really help. Thanks in advance seniors, this little brother appreciates it.

Topic: self promotion to get a job as developer in the tech
- CV short with bullet points or include also a brief description of experiences, skills in action and personal attitudes?
- Website? GitHub page? Suggestions about what highlight in personal git repos?
- Other things that could help to let you be noted in the pre-screening process of the recruiters?