When this guy started asking me a bunch of googled questions such as:
Why should I hire you?
Why do you want this job?
What do you know about the company?
Describe your biggest fear?
What's your biggest strength/weakness ?
Dood pls

Client: The image upload functionality is broken!!
Me: just tested it, works fine.
Client: no I'm trying to upload this image and it says It cannot complete the request.
Me: hmmm...
Client: does the fact that the image is 36MB has something to do with it?
Me:

That client that wants to host their shitty one page website in their own IT servers bc don't trust Rackspace or AWS

When creative director starts sentence with: "Can we JUST..."

>Error: too many errors. Press any key to continue.

Client asks to point their domain to a new 'squarespace' they just got, then call you bc they cannot access the admin console to their old site and 'it's so weird that all the requests are now going to squarespace !!'

God, please make this be my last WordPress project 🙏

When PM sets up a meeting to discuss stuff that can be solved over an email

I work at an ad agency, so my most exciting project is yet to come

When someone interrupts your flow

Programming languages / frameworks you dominate? Me:
-Rails / RoR
-C/C++
-PHP / laravel
-Javascript / jQuery / Backbone etc..
- Python / django

▲
▲‌ ▲

Recruiter calls to my open office job, asks for me.
Coworker: hey Such N. Such is on the phone for you.
Me: idk who he is, tell him to leave a message.
Coworker: ok. He says to please call him back about an amazing dev position @ XYZ.

Savage

When the 15min stand-up meeting is 30 mins long

Me: I'll be working from home today
PM: That's not good...
Me: why?
PM: ... ... ... ...