Respect to all women in CS. They are in fact better when it comes to clean code and concept.
Prof. Kamala Krithivasan, is teaching some hardest shit in CS.

Turning Machine;
https://youtube.com/watch/...

A friend of mine is youtuber and he does a lot tests on phone ( call him X)
Another friend of mine hates Apple product. Partly because he can’t afford it (call him Y)

whenever X wants to do a WATER RESISTANCE TEST, Y would go: “Lets fuck Iphone”
whenever X wants to do a HEAT RESISTANCE TEST, Y would go: “Lets fuck Iphone”
whenever X wants to do a DROP TEST, Y would go: “Lets fuck Iphone”

One fine day, same happened and X got a bit red. X says: Y come here. Closer, a little more ( few centimeters away now). “Are you fucking mad or what?”

On friday -
I got a feeling🎶
Tonights gonna be the last night for coding.

Fuck no, its a universal law there will be monday.

brainfuck - your next programming language. A simple tutorial
Sample 1:
-[------->+<]>.-[->++++<]>.++[--->++<]>.+++.+++++++.+[->+++<]>.--[--->+<]>-.+[->+++<]>+.+.[--->+<]>-.----.+++[->+++<]>++.+++++++++++++.++++++.[++>---<]>.++[--->++<]>.++[->++<]>.[--->+<]>+++.[--->+<]>-----.--[->++++<]>+.----------.++++++.--[->+++++<]>.
Output: "I love devrant. Do you?"

Sample 2:
----[---->+<]>++.[--->+<]>+++.----------.-[--->+<]>-.--[->++++<]>+.----------.++++++.---.[-->+++++<]>+++.[->+++<]>++.[--->+<]>----.+++[->+++<]>++.++++++++.+++++.-[->+++++<]>-.-[--->++<]>-.++++++++++.+[---->+<]>+++.++[->+++<]>.-[--->+<]>--.+[->+++<]>+.++++++++.------.-.[->+++<]>++.++[--->++<]>.[-->+++++<]>-.+[--->+<]>++.[-->+++++<]>+++.-[--->++<]>-.+++++++++++.[---->+<]>+++.-[--->++<]>-.++++++++++.-----.[++>---<]>++.[->+++<]>-.-[->+++++<]>.

Output: "And your brain is fucked. Or it isn't?"
----------------------
Wanna play with it?
Text to brainfuck: https://copy.sh/brainfuck/text.html
Brainfuck to text:
https://sange.fi/esoteric/...

😃My boss, always positive.
Somebody told him about node.

He came to office and says...
Node sounds a good plan for our app. How many nodes we need to host a website?🤔

😐ctrl/cmd + s to sacrifice file.😑
Teacher: always save your file or else data will be lost. ctrl + s

Me: in word
__________
| |
| |
| |
| page 1 |
__________
ctrl + s ( 10 times)💾

Next day I open this file, my data is lost.

I sware to god i hit ctrl + s 10 times.

1 + 1 = ? 🤔
Ans: 10. 😎
Got zero in exam for this. 😭

let gfInput = '';
try {
gfInput = getInput('Will you marry me? ')
if(gfInput == 'Y'){
// KISS HER
}else{
throw {msg: 'she dumped you.', code: 'red'}
}
} catch( err ) {
//if err.code !== red . just cry but if red... uh oh
if(err.code == 'red'){
// GOTTA DO SOME DAMAGE
let msg = {
sender: 'anonymous',
recipients : ['dad', 'mom', 'brother', 'sister', 'uncle'],
messageBody: '****ntha has been fucking some dude...'
}

sendText(msg);
}
} finally{
// send ****ntha a good bye message
var msg = {
sender: 'pk359',
recipients: ['****ntha'],
messageBody: 'I invite you ****ntha to my wedding with your best friend *licia. PEACE, bit*h'
}
sendText(msg)
}

😁🐳🏄‍♂️🏊‍♂️
Weeeeeeeek - END🤽‍♂️🤽‍♂️🏖🏝
-----------------------------------
I am authorized to say FUCK WORK. I don't wanna hear anything else but PARTY PARTY PARTY for these two HOLY DAY.

Long week of work, going to enjoy beach tomorrow.🚣‍♂️🚣‍♂️🚣‍♂️🚿⛱⛱

🤣🤣🤣
Somehow, my boss got his son, 19, working in a team of developers last week.
Son: i got ton of money and i dont need to do this. i inherit lot of properties from my dad.(trying to sound funny, superior, and boasting of his inheritance knowledge he might have learned in school during java class probably.)

A guy in the team: No you dont. You are like us.😎😎😎
Son: minds his own business now.

Damn that line made my day.
🤗👏👏👏👏

++ for this dude for insulting morons like this at work.
I may have to remove it on boss request if he see it. But for now hit as many ++ to show that idiot no body likes people like him.

-----During a 6 days official vacation with my family--------
Me: Hey boss, cozz o u, I fucked up my laptop.
Boss: how?
Me: My wife threw it outside the hotel window and I see my laptops pieces now.
....a little pause....
I would love to do more of your work while I am on vacation.(inside my head: motherfucker never ask me to do that again) Do you mind sending me about $5000 so I can buy a laptop here and continue your work?

At 4pm, after 6 hours of work of migrating from mysql to mongodb...
I am drinking coffee with my team.
Boss, comes from somewhere and asks...

what do you all want? (What he meant was, go back to work you all)

One of my team member- (angry and agitated) says-- a comfortable sofa.

Holy fuck, i laughed my ass out.

Guess what happend next...

🤘 😈😈😹 🤘
Wordpress documentation...
"
Hi all, 😎 welcome to wordpress.
Use it as your last resort. Fuck all programming langs. Php is love, php is life."

Oh by the way documentation also says:
"
Wordpress gives you all the freedom you can imagine. Say for instance... You can use any language for server EXCEPT python, ruby, java, c# and many more.[note: Keep looking for the updated list of EXCEPT as new languages come we add it here.]
"
😂😂😂

Impractical jokers makes me happy again when my brain is dead fucked coding.