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An intern I was supposed to lead (as an intern) and work with. Which sounded kinda crazy to me, but also fun so I rolled with it. But when I met her I quickly found out she didn't even have a coding editor installed and when I advised one she was "scared of virusses". She had Microsoft Edge in her toolbar, and some picture of a cat as a background. We were given some project by our boss, and a freelance programmer helped us set it up on Trello. Great, lets start! Oke maybe first some R&D, she had to reaeach how to use the Twilio API. After catching her on WhatsApp a few times I realised this wasnt gonna go anywere. After a few weeks of coding and posting a initial project to git I asked her if she could show me the code of the API she made so far..
She told me she was using the quickstart guide (the last 3 FUCKING weeks) which contained some test project with specific use cases.
The one that I did 3 weeks ago that same fucking morning.
AND SHE WAS STILL NOT DONE...
A few days later I asked her about the progress (strangly, I wasn't allowed ti give her another task bcs the freelanc already did) and guess what... She got fking pissed at me
Her: "I will come to you when im done, ok?"
Me: "I just want to see how it is going so far and if you are running into any problems!"
Her: "I dont want to show you right now"
She then goes to my fucking boss to tell him I am bothering her.
And omg... Please dear god please kill me now...
Instead of him saying the she probably didn't do shit. He says to me that the girl thinks im looking down on her and she needs a stress free environment to work in. She will show me when its done. ITS A FUCKING QUICKSTART GUIDE YOU DUMB BITCH.
He then procceeded to whine to me about the email template (another project I do at the same time) which didn't look perfect in all of his clients.
Dont they understand that I am not a frontend developer? Can you stop please? I know nothing about email templates, I told you this!!!
Really... the whole fucking internship the only thing the girl did was ask people if they want more tea. Then she starts cleaning the windows, talk to people for an hour, or clean everyone's dask.
all this while I already made 50% of the fucking product and she just finished the quickstart tutorial 😭. Truly 2 months wasted, and the worse thing is I didn't get any apprication. They constantly blamed me and whined at me. Sometimes for being 3 minutes late, the other for smoking too much, or because I drink to much coffee, or that I dont eat healthy. They even forced me to play Ping Pong. While im just trying to do my job. One of the worst things they got mad at me for if when my laptop got hacked bcs it was infected with some virus. He had remote access and bought 5 iPhones 6's with my paypal while I was on break. I had to go home and quickly reset all my passwords and make sure the iPhones wouldnt get delivered. strange this was, this laptop I only used at the company. So it must have been software I had to download there. Probably phpstorm (torrent). Bcs nobody would give me a license. And the freelancer said I * have to *.
the monday after I still had to reinstall windows so I called them and said I would be late. when I came they were so disrepectfull and didn't understand anything. It went a little like this:
Boss: why u late?
Me: had to reinstall my laptop, sorry.
Boss: why didnt you do this in your own time?
Me: well, I didn't have any time.
Boss: cant you do this in the weekend or something? Because now we have to pay you several hours bcs you downloaded something at home.
Me: I am only using this laptop for work so thats not possible.
Boss: how can that even be possible? You are not doing anything at home with your laptop? Is that why you never do anything at home?
Me: uhm, I have desktop computer you know. Its much faster. And I also need to rest sometimes. Areeb (freelancer) told me to torrent the software. He gave me the link. 2 days later this happends
Boss: Ahh okeee I see.. Well dont let it happen again.
After that nobody at the compamy trusted me with anything computer related. Yes it was my own fault I downloaded a virus but it can happen to anyone. After that I never used Windows again btw, also no more auto login apps.8 -
Storytime!
Manager: Hey fullstackchris, the maps widget on our app stopped working recently...
Dev: (Skeptical, little did he know) Sigh... probably didn't raise quota or something stupid... Logs on to google cloud console to check it out...
Google Dashboard: Your bill.... $5,197 (!!!!!!) Payment method declined (you think?!)
Dev: 😱 WTF!?!?!! (Calls managers) Uh, we have HUGE problem, charges for $5000+ in our google account, did you guys remove the quota limits or not see any limit reached warnings!?
Managers: Uh, we didn't even know that an API could cost money, besides, we never check that email account!
Dev: 🤦♂️ yeah obviously you get charged, especially when there have literally been millions of requests. Anyway, the bigger question is where or how our key got leaked. Somewhat started hammering one of the google APIs with one of our keys (Proceeds to hunt for usages of said API key in the codebase)
Dev: (sweating 😰) did I expose an API key somewhere? Man, I hope it's not my fault...
Terminal: grep results in, CMS codebase!
Dev: ah, what do we have here, app.config, seems fine.... wait, why did they expose it to a PUBLIC endpoint?!
Long story short:
The previous consulting goons put our Angular CMS JSON config on a publicly accessible endpoint.
WITH A GOOGLE MAPS API KEY.
JUST CHILLING IN PLAINTEXT.
Though I'm relieved it wasn't my fault, my faith in humanity is still somewhat diminished. 🤷♂️
Oh, and it's only Monday. 😎
Cheers!7 -
Should I be afraid right now?
Dev: can I swap out an existing UI framework from this codebase for a completely different one, because it doesn't do the small enhancement I've been tasked to do?
Me: ...............
please lord, give me strength in these pressing times.6 -
I did just quit my job.
It was my first job ever.
The only job I've ever had.
But I kinda couldn't take it anymore, the pay was a bit too low and the projects were really demanding.
On Monday, I'll sign my new contract in another company, I'm REALLY looking forward to it and barely can wait!
I'll be working with just one tech-stack which is awesome compared to now where I have to work on like 5 different stacks, sometimes in a single day.
I can't wait for the new job to kick in.11 -
colleague in a planning meeting: so now it's Easter, which in Germany is public holidays on friday and monday
PM: i as a manager would find it great if there weren't any public holidays
yeah not surprised, but thank fuck you're not the one to decide that... some people are trying to have a life^^11 -
Story of onboarding in the age of Corona!
Monday:
Office is big but almost empty, people are working from home. Guy welcoming me says he is not the one supposed to help me(he is sick I'm told) and the rest of the team is not there. The man I'm talking to is this other guys boss. It's OK I think it will work out.
Turns out this guy helping me is actually the CTO so he does not have that much time on his hands. He shows me were to get my computer and desk and hands me documentation to setup some software.
I spend the time before lunch installing linux, setting up git and some other software. CTO checks up on me once.
Then after lunch nothing...I look for him but he is in some meeting. I find some videos by myself labled "onboarding" on the company website. They are OK. I ask my deskmate if he heard what team I will be in. He doesn't know. I sneak out a little early since I have nothing left to do.
Tuesday:
The CTO is now also sick I see in an email when I arrive at the office. Still don't know what team I am in.
I spend the morning reading coding blogs and websites. After lunch I have a meeting. The only one in my calendar. It's about the product software architecture for all new employees. It's good but still no news about what team. I aimlessly read up on some software architecture untill I go home.
Wednesday:
I arrive at the office first, only the receptionist is there. I listen to podcasts until a few more people show up. I ask another guy if he knows what team I'm supposed to be in. He doesn't but laughs and says it was the same when he started last year.
I send out messages on slack looking for anyone that knows...still no one knows. I guess Im in limbo now. Perhaps i should just start making coffee for people or something...14 -
Had 2 days of vacation. Theoretically (plus weekend, plus 2 days) 6 days.
Worked today… At Saturday.
Some administrators forgot to properly check bandwidth limitations....
*rolls eyes*
We had a major version upgrade of some server software at Monday.
Guess why I got called...
Of course it MUST be the software upgrade.
It couldn't be the new hardware that was setup 2 weeks ago and on which a lot of "important" VMs were migrated.
*eyes roll inside till only white is visible*
The even more annoying thing is that it wasn't that hard to figure out.
Looking at monitoring, we had spikes on 20 Gbit/s (roughly 2.x Gigabyte/sec - Ethernet) connection of some server at roughly 1.9 plus Gigabyte/sec.
IO latency spikes that made the graph look like a heartbeat EKG with severe tachycardia...
*additionally to white eyes starts cursing in reverse latin*
Incompetent admin answer: Booboo that can only be your fault - the developers must investigate.
Me (just a tad more polite): Meep Meep mother fucker, get your shit together. If the software would eat that much, the network would be a niece chunk of charcoal. Plus the time (sending instead of links to monitoring pictures… guess the lazy fucktard who's brain is a vacuum didn't even bother to check it)...
NOTICE SOMETHING?!
Incompetent admin: It starts at the same time. Always.
After wasting roughly another hour of time discussing with him, I just hanged up the video call.
Called someone I knew from the admin department and turns out that - drumrolls please - the incompetent admin was someone who got recruited 3 months ago…
*turning into antichrist*
I then had a not so polite discussion about how the only competent people could take days off (all except incompetent admin were on vacation) and the seemingly incompetent fresh recruit - who by the way NEVER mentioned this - was the only one left of the admin department. Which would be bad alone, but no - he even got the 24/7 emergency support role for the whole weekend.
Sometimes this company and HR especially notoriously drive me insane...
Guess next week there will be some HR barbecue.
But yeah. After a lot of raging around we nailed it down to the traffic of backups and could fix it.
Roughly 4 hours of analysis, communication, raging and hatred.
Just one hour implementing shit.
*goozfraba*9 -
Manager: we should arrange regular catchups, I have several Monday morning, how about 10:30, that'd be 9:30 your time?
Me inside: dude, we both know I struggle to be up in time for the scrum at 10, do you really think I'm going to be any better at 9:30?
Me outside: How about 10:30 after scrum?
Manager: OK, that works, I have half an hour between meetings
Me: Thank fuck.4 -
I got my first job, first work is monday
I still worrying about this job might be one of the many small shitty company horror story.
I don't know shit about working, so I decided to find out myself. Wish me luck.8 -
Hope you survived the Monday;)
As I promised, I’d like to post my comic series “Destory” here regularly.
A story about two devs and their funny but serious project, on the hype technology - the blockchain.
6 -
!rant
tl;dr; quit my job last monday. going to grow my side hustle into full time freelancing.
I am so exited.
---
Story time:
I am working full time as a jack of all trades and also have a side business where I coach people on an ERP for doors/fenestration and also write custom software in c#.
I was able to manage both over ~4 years, with customer amount slowly growing (only doing B2B).
Last month I opened an account at a freelancer website just for the lulz and damn after a short amount of time the orders exploded. I had to shut it down again because I cannot manage the amount of work. But did manage to win a fair amount of customers that will keep me busy for the next year or two.
Spoke to my employer and told them about the situation (they know about my side business and it's all mentioned in the contracts). Said that I would need half the amount of hours with my business to reach the same amount of money and that working as an employee makes no sense for me in terms of money. I would however like to work 1 to 2 days in a week for them because working there is fun, even when its financially uninteresting.
they took one week to prepare a position and then invited me to a meeting. "we offer you 32 hours a week. if you want more, you have to make a descision. As a self employed person you have risk and we as an employer do not want to carry that risk for you and we do not want to finance your self employment" (etc.)
Thought I am in the wrong movie. I took that into the weekend and thought a lot about what has been said.
And last monday I invited to a follow up and told them
"sorry, I think I was not clear enough. Working for you is of no interest in terms of money. You do not finance me, it's the other way around. Sadly we do not come to an agreement, as 8 hours less does not fit the need. You said I need to make a descision. I do not want to do this but I'm quitting".
They responded with "Oh that is sad to hear. Is there anything that we can make so you do not leave?"
"Either pay me the same I would make as a self employed or follow my conditions"
Did not get a response on that.
I now have three months to prepare myself for self employment.
Currently working 40h + growing side business + getting the whole german bureaucracy shit together.
Tough time but hell this feels so damn good.
Just wanted to share this :)5 -
Sometimes I leave comments to myself at the end of the work week to remember on monday where I left off
Anyone else does this? 🤔11 -
Monday morning: The last straw.
After talking about in a previous rant about how my client wants to fix bugs that keeps popping out after bug fix.
Today I discovered, that all C-levels, worked all Saturday to "fix my code" because it "didn't work" and we "needed bug fixes not pretty things".
The app version I was working on for the last week is gone. Without mentioning that their "CTO" wrote a fucking crappy code to disable features that I added, breaking the build step.
This shit is enough for me, I'm done!3 -
Random PTO sick day request on a Monday, approved within minutes.
Schedule a PTO request for six days off three months in advance?
Pending for three weeks.
Sigh. -
Have a nice weekend programmer's!!!!!
I hope your code behaves on Monday the same way it did on Friday.....🤣😂🤣3 -
The most annoying hack I've had to deal with was back when I did IT support, actually. Level 1 call center tech at the time. Apparently someone fell for a phishing email and gave out his outlook credentials. The phisher used that email account to send out another phishing email to roughly 1800 employees.
Security Operations noticed, because this guy's job didn't generally involve sending out mass-communication emails. They investigated, figured out what had happened, and opted for the nuclear option: they reset the password for EVERY SINGLE ACCOUNT that received the email. All 1800 of them. Over the weekend.
I walked into the call center Monday morning and checked the call stats, then did a double-take. There were over 300 people waiting in the queue. I almost left and called in sick. Turns out it wasn't that bad though. Annoying to reset so many passwords and having no downtime due to the full queue, but on the other hand my stats were better that day than any other, since every call was a 5-minute password reset.1 -
What the FUCK im fixing integrations on some dumbass's API. Biz wants this in prod on monday. It's fucking saturday. Anyway
Me: why did you give us a 200 even if its an error
Them: thats normal
Me: If it's an error it shouldnt be 200
Them: its a 200 because the api params are correct but differ in value so its not an http error but an api error
lmao2 -
Finally got rid of my old job I ranted about so much. Started a new one on Monday. A bit anxious and terrified (there is a lot to learn) but it feels good. The team is fun and they know what they are doing. BUT most importantly: they know how to plan projects and know how to intervene if a project is about to run out of resources. NICE.
I'll keep you posted on how it goes1 -
Tip: Write `throw new Error("problem: <your task for next Monday, and your last thoughts about that>") at the end of your test-file.
Then you come back to work after the weekend and know exactly where you left off!
Thank me later, as I thank my Friday-4pm-me1 -
so am 23 , with a work experience of 1.5 years (1 year at b2c cumpany, 6 months at current b2b company) and am kinda uncomfortable with the comfort in my job.
tldr : my company has a work heaven and a very boring product , the nature of tasks makes me feel like a glorified QA and i am kinda feeling like wasting my 20s. should i quit?
my last company used to keep me on toes. they had this massive multi module fast evolving android app on which i used to work. it was made with latest techs from 2021/+ and combined with a lot of modules/architecture, it was very overwhelming at first.
i used to work 12+ hours everyday , not because of any pressure ( the pressure to execute fast was there, but the team was very helpful and understanding) , but because i liked to learn and explore.
at the end of my journey with them, i left with a lot of good memories with helpful seniors, a great knowledge of android dev and an unsatisfactory amount of bank balance.
my current company is... i guess ok. the work here is awkward. the product is made of either legacy techs(large verbose java project in which even concurrency or image downloading classses are written in project and not any 3rd party library) or techs that i don't find interesting ( unity , react native , flutter, etc projects that are just wrapper over native sdks)
its heen 6 months here and the growth for me here seems weird.
- i mean i can say i got to work on different techs but 1) am not becoming a master or anything useful in those techs . and 2) i already know a frontend framework i.e native android which i like and was growing in it.
- most tickets are client side tasks : client is unable to use some feature/product > i ask for their logs / app and weather they followed the docs/sample > they say we did> i check the logs which indicates that they didn't > i inform them the step and they are back to being happy. but most of the times i am also clueless and get to the conclusions after discussing with my seniors
- the non client tasks that i got were also not very interesting : one ticket was included testing out all sdks and 3rd party integrations and make a csv of what features are available in each . another was about creating a cicd pipeline that was kinda okay. but now its done so am guessing am back to making it useful by adding more unit tests :/
- however the work environment is very good i guess? daily scrum happens on MWF only, i get literally 0 meetings if not urgent on TT . apart from sat/sun and general festivals, the 3rd monday of every month is off . plus i get 2 additional paid leaves every month that gets can be carry forwarded for 11 months. in a nutshell, i feel like being the son of a school principal in school.
- pay is good , i switched here for an almost 100% hike
i have tried to utilise my time in learning different tech stacks (working on android all the time feels like unworthy) but i am not getting a kick. the satisfaction that i got in writing code that is immediately being used by 5 million people gave me the kicker to learn more and more.. but now am just feeling like being on a extended vacation where i have to sometimes wash utensils.
should i start interviewing with other companies? it's not like my current company is some well established corporate to always keep less worthy resources like me around. i am definitely worth getting the axe on the next possible layoffs7 -
Dev: Sends weekly update email on Friday, as drudgingly required by management, outlining that stress level is high recently in the past two weeks and constant polling for feedback and updates is stressing him out, needs to slow down the pace
Management: (ON A FUCKING SATURDAY): "Received your email @fullStackChris"
WOW! THANKS FOR THAT INSIGHTFUL UPDATE! I BET YOU DID! I HAVE NO DOUBT GOOGLE'S SMTP SERVERS ARE RUNNING PROPERLY. AND AFTER READING IT, YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY TO @ ME IN A WHATSAPP MESSAGE. ON A FUCKING SATURDAY. I DON'T WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU, I DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT THE COMPANY OR ITS TASKS UNTIL MONDAY. PLEASE STOP.
I mean they must be fucking with me at this point, right guys? Maybe I should start writing stuff like "I need more tasks and more messages throughout the day" then I would probably receive less, I mean wtf is actually going on.7 -
I was watching cards @ rams on Monday. Commercials were on so naturally I was using my phone when suddenly I hear the slack's notification sound from somewhere in the room. I look up thinking what teammate is messaging me and what could they possibly want, only to realize there's a slack advert on and the notification sound came from it. Why would slack show ad mid NFL games AND put a sound that everyone associates with work? I am 🤏 close to suing slack for causing work trauma outside work hours1
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had been working from home and that was my plan for today as well but got called to office on a MONDAY for some hardware related stuff and guess what? the stuff related to it isn't here. thanks
IT1 -
everyone's having a bad monday because daylight saving kicked in and everyone's calendar is now messed up (employees in different countries, some's daylight saving kicked in, some's didn't)1
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Recently I've had a lot of realistic dreams and it's awful. For example, yesterday I dreamed that I have a SoftEng lecture on Monday at 9am. The day before I dreamed that Russia defeated Ukraine and are now neighbors with Hungary. On both occasions I was later convinced that the memory fragments were true until I either received conflicting news or some unrelated trigger reminded me of the later, unrealistic parts of the dream.
I can sort of deal with the possibility that my current life is a dream and I'll eventually wake up and start over from an unspecified morning, but the possibility that while living in reality an arbitrary subset of my memories comes from dreams is much worse3 -
I don't know how to do what I'm thinking, and I can feel the impulsive, curious part of my brain preparing to spend hours reading, testing, and researching things.
Guess it's gonna be another all nighter. And it's only Monday.1 -
it's monday morning. ofc the first thing i do is open devrant to see what hell monday is brining on others.
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Sometimes, all you just need is to...
Disconnect yourself from everyone and everything for some time, and find a place where you find peace of mind and comfort.
Direct communication with your inner soul which is also known as healthy self-talk gives all the answers and helps you find the way to move ahead.
Self-motivation works wonders, remember that!1 -
About to start my new job (on Monday).
I went to the new office once to get the new work laptop (a fucking Mac).
They also told me be fast in setting up the work email as the client i'll be working on will send some instruction on how to use their accounts.
Even heard them since... hopefully they'll just pay me for doing basically nothing as I now have literally NOTHING to work on when I'll start.
Also, they told me something about the project I'll be working on, and to be honest, the whole project would take about 2 months to be done from scratch, but we have until November to make it work... I'm so fucking confused!2 -
Now my desktop wifi dongle is crapping out ...
Why is all this happening RIGHT AFTER black Friday, cyber monday....3 -
My brother works in fintech sector. He had created an Options strategy after months of hard work and deployed the strategy in production via CI/CD.
However, the strategy didn't deploy automatically on Monday and few trades didn't happen leading to loss. His boss came down firing at him as to why strategy was not deployed.
Turns out the IT team had changed the password on Friday evening as per their routine password updates.1 -
Why recruiters are sometimes taking so long to answer? I did my final stage of interview with the companie's client (out of 4 stages in total) last Thursday.
Client came back with positive feedback at Monday at the end of workday. Today is Tuesday and internal recruiter was supposed to call me to make an offer and discuss starting date.
Now again workday is nearly over and no contact from her. Tomorrow is a national holiday so she will get back to me at best on Thursday.
Goddamnit why it takes so long, if Im starting next Monday I need to prepare myself. Im seriously getting second thoughts such as even about declining the offer if they will try to lowball me. Previous week they really rushed the process and I had to do 4 stages of interviews and this week they are wasting my time. Am I being impatient or what?2
Best mentor: https://devrant.com/rants/5266128/...