Starting with some joke

Developer 1: You know what they say, programming is just like sex.

Developer 2: Wait, what? I've never heard that before.

Developer 1: Yeah, you spend all your time trying to fix things that should never have happened in the first place.

:) :(

Bruh, my heart is pounding. Almost lost the branch I've been working on for weeks to a force push

*laughs in statically typed*

New Gods

my students use ChatGPT to solve programming exercises... they will surely get a very bad grade!

Cache this 😛

Me: I need a subtitle for the header on my website: “Our Team”

Chatgpt: Sure, here are good subtitles for “Our Team” header on your website:
— Meet the Experts
— Our Skilled Professionals
— Talent at Your Service
…

Me: Make it a little bit lengthier:

Chatgpt: Sure, here is a more detailed subtitle option for the “Our Team” header on your website:

{{was actually expecting 2 to 3 lines but dude proceeds to write a full page long content explaining “Our Team”}}

I feel like this dude gets orgasm when it sees the word “lengthier”.

Converting all my side projects from C# .Net Framework to C# .Net Core (or Node.js) is a rewarding but long process.

credits to fb:@entertainmentxlab

TS humor

A normal day on discord

seniorDev has added the feature, which has got deployed. I thought added feature is not appropriate and i forced him to remove the feature. After few days, clients demanded same feature
Moral: respect SeniorDev.

Why is it that every code push to fix one bug makes 3 more 🙃

Hey...

Why don’t we buy Apple iPhone clones instead of the real thing?

After all, we only care about hardware when it comes to smartphones!

Was joking with my sister about who has more steps. She had done more steps so far, so I said that I would walk 20 times around the McDonald's, where we were going to eat. She replied that she would walk 50 times around it, so I said that I would walk 2 times more around it than she would. She then said, that she would go once more around it. In the end, I explained recursion and infinite loops to her. Her comment was "großer Blödsinn" (German) -> "big bullshit".

This is a pretty good ad.

Name a more iconic duo, Ctrl+C & Ctrl+V.

A young guy I work with burst into tears today, I had no idea what happened so I tried to comfort him and ask what was up.

It appears his main client had gone nuts with him because they wanted him to make an internet toolbar (think Ask.com) and he politely informed them toolbars doesn't really exist anymore and it wouldn't work on things like modern browsers or mobile devices.

Being given a polite but honest opinion was obviously something the client wasn't used to and knowing the guy was a young and fairly inexperienced, they started throwing very personal insults and asking him exactly what he knows about things (a lot more than them).

So being the big, bold, handsome senior developer I am, I immediately phoned the client back and told them to either come speak to me face-to-face and apologise to him in person or we'd terminate there contract with immediate effect. They're coming down tomorrow...

So part my rant, part a rant on behalf of a young developer who did nothing wrong and was treated like shit, I think we've all been there.

We'll see how this goes! Who the hell wants a toolbar anyway?!

npm install -g create-react-app
create-react-app hello-world
du -sh ./hello-world/node_modules

253 MB

ಠ_ಠ

My "Coding Standards" for my dev team

1.) Every developer thinks or have thought their shit don't stink. If you think you have the best code, submit it to your peers for review. The results may surprise you.

2.) It doesn't matter if you've been working here for a day or ten years. Everyone's input is valuable. I don't care if you're the best damn programmer. If you ever pull rank or seniority on someone who is trying to help, even if it isn't necessarily valid or helpful, please have your resume ready to work elsewhere.

3.) Every language is great and every language sucks in their own ways. We don't have time for a measuring contest. The only time a language debate should arise is for the goal of finding the right one for the project at hand.

4.) Comment your code. We don't have time to investigate what the structure and purpose of your code is when we need to extend upon it.

5.) If you use someone else's work, give them the credit in your comments. Plagiarism will not be tolerated.

6.) If you use flash, you will be taken out back and shot. If you survive, you will be shot again.

7.) If you load jQuery for the sole purpose of writing a simple function, #6 applies.

8.) Unless it is an actual picture, there is little to no reason for not utilizing CSS. That's what it's there for.

9.) We don't support any version of Internet Explorer and Edge other than the latest versions, and only layout/alignment fixes will be bothered with.

10.) If you are struggling with a task, reach out. While you should be able to work independently, it doesn't make sense to waste your time and everyone else's to not seek assistance when needed.

11.) I'm serious about #6 and #7. Don't do it.

It's the shitty os after all... 😜

Motherfucker.

After about six hours of debugging I finally figured out that the error I'm getting is happening CLIENT SIDE AND NOT FUCKING SERVER SIDE. Yes, I've been debugging everything on the SERVER SIDE.

MOTHERFUCKING FUCK.FML.

Rofl😂😂😂

That feeling! Thanks @dfox & @trogus and thanks to the community for your ++ thanks from 🇨🇭

Can you see that 1px difference?

When SoloLearn provides a better education than your university...

F@#$% ANDROID STUDIO! You should definitely add a feature of giving a Pop-up window asking if the user REALLY WANTS TO OPEN THE SOFTWARE OR NOT!
You should see my face when I click on android studio icon by accident 😩 on my Windows...

Via 8shit