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Quit my first dev job. Don’t have another gig lined up. Here’s hoping I find another gig before I run out of savings.
Wish me luck, folks.20 -
It's kind of neat knowing people who are famous for things I don't care about, and having their numbers / talking semi-regularly. They're a special person to so many others, but to me they're just some random person that's mildly annoying.
Like API Guy.
Freaking API Guy.
He's a millionaire musician who's adored by literally millions of people, but none of them know he writes absolutely terrible APIs, zero tests, rushes to the shiniest new things, and happily agrees to everything (often without listening) only to deny it later. Absolutely infuriating.
Or knowing one of Netscape founders as that strange and really terrible trumpet player with the great tequila. He did give me his copy of The C Programming Language (the bible) though. He was cool. Super weird, but cool.
It's just a strange feeling. I don't care, and yet others inexplicably think I should. I don't understand it. They're just people? idk.14 -
!rant
In our advanced software engineering lecture everyone has to hold a free presentation about about an own topic.
One of my fellow students picked “failed IT large-scale projects” and - of course - had some german examples with him. You know, we germans are good in failing large projects🤣
He has chosen “FISCUS”, a project that wanted to unify the german tax system. It was a FIaSCUS. 13 years without any progess. 13 ... years ...
ok, but this is, where the story begins. The student then began to enumerate the reasons, why it has failed.
He told about bad architectures and stuff like that until the teacher interrupted him.
“No, that’s false. We had the problem, that some states, blablabla”
The important word was the “we” and we realized, that this student has by chance picked exactly that big project in which our teacher was the PM.
What the Heck.
He than had to think triple, about everything he had planed to say😂5 -
TLDR: Read the post.
Bare with me here, I am new to all of this jazz. But I wanted to tell a story.
I have been a programmer for a while now, working on various projects with various companies, doing various things. I know that sounds vague, but it's the truth.
I never work on the same thing, ever, I never work with any fancy IDE, because I don't need one. I personally believe no developer works with the massive huge code base all at once, but instead works on it in pieces. That's a story for another day.
I have seen the shittiest of the shittiest and some how survived, I have been beaten down by code bases that were out sourced yet some how managed to stand up and gain my baring and fight back. I have dealt with clients, bosses and idiots from A-Z. Watching them all scramble around for their pennies like greedy rich white men seeking more pennies to swim in.
Some how I survived all this. I started working from home almost 3 years ago, the freedom is exhilarating. The ability to fuck off for most of the day and work at night, or work all morning and fuck off. There's nothing better.
As you work from home you think, this will be amazing. Until the crippling loneliness takes over and even the 6th bottle of beer doesn't quench the thirst of human contact. The pain of being trapped in the four white walls of your office makes that bottle of tequila, to numb out the emptiness inside look more satisfying.
At some point, you crawl out of your space to find people to interact with, refusing to be beaten down by both shit code and loneliness only to find all your friends, family and significant others are working, in offices, where they cant just fuck off for a day with you. The silence of the house, the office, the what ever becomes deafening.
its crawling all over you like bugs that pick away at your mind, breaking you, hating you. So you decide that a coffee shop is the best place, only to sit there and people watch or check Facebook or what ever else people do at coffee shops that isn't actually work.
The point in all of this, is that working from home is both a positive and a negative. It has destroyed me, created a workaholic and, probably, an alcoholic. There isnt a day I dont wish that I could sleep away the deafening silence of the world around me as every one busies off to the office.
One might think: get an office job, but I have become accustomed to my misery, pain and suffering of working from home, isolated and medicated by vaping and alcohol. the freedom, from what I have found, is worth more then the sacrifice of it - to work around people I slowly begin to hate, people that make me want to overdose on anything rather then see their smug faces and be beaten down by their idiotic words, code bases and money grubbing hands...
I guess I'll get back to work now, in my house, with my cats, my vape and my beer. Here's to freedom and the sacrifices that go along with it.5 -
Linkedin hunter per excellence. They are looking for “an experienced Expert for a position as Junior IT Consultant“.
Well, I have some experience, but someone should really explain them the concept of being a Junior Expert...5 -
Random guy: Hey you're from Mexico ! Let's party and drink Tequila, let's go for Mamacitas !!!
Me: no, I have to work!
Random guy: come on you Mexicans don't work, and always wears a Zarape !
Me: Come on man ! It's fucking 21th century !!! You can't think that way ! I don't fucking wear a Zarape, I don't like Tequila and for the love of God is so wrong to call women "Mamacitas"2 -
Two C strings walk into a bar.
The bartender asks "What can I get ya?"
The first string says "I'll have a gin and tonic."
The second string thinks for a minute, then says "I'll take a tequila sunriseJF()#$JF(#)$(@J#()$@#())!*FNIN!OBN134ufh1ui34hf9813f8h8384h981h3984h5F!##@"
The first string apologizes, "You'll have to excuse my friend, he's not null-terminated."1 -
My day:
5:30AM - 2yo son wakes me up, I send him back to his bed
6AM - wakes me up again, gotta grab a coffee
7:30AM - leaving towards the office
8:30AM - finally arriving to the office, after horrible traffic.
*continue working on major schema change I started yesterday*
12:30PM - Lunch + Beer
1:30PM - Tequila time!
*back to work*
7:30PM - Finally done with coding, leaving the office
8PM - home at last
9:30PM - Beer time
9:31PM - "I'll just write a couple of more lines"
12:30AM - "That's it, no more code for today"
12:31AM - "I'll just scroll through devRant"1 -
I appreciate “elegant” code the same way I appreciate fine wine: pretending to care while quietly sitting, passively listening to snobs drone on about barrel aging and vineyards and languages, statically-typed while simultaneously shutting my brain off, ordering another shot of tequila and working up the courage to fight my dad.
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Cocktail Development #1 - Codename: Devjito
Hello fellow developers! I was enjoing some sweet selfmade cocktails lately. One of the commentators shouted out for me to "don't stop the cocktail rants!".
But, because I didn't wanted to just "Post random cocktails", I tried to develope my own cocktails. Afterwards I will share my experiences while creating these with you, and of course, the recipe!
So first we got my Experiment: Devjito - A Cocktail for all of you fellow programmers!
What we need:
- 4cl Tequila
- 4cl Wodka
- 4cl Dry Gin
- 4cl White Rum
- 2cl "Grenadine" Syrup
- 2 teaspoons of white sugar
- 8cl of Orangejuice
- Sodawater
- Icecubes
- Mintleaves(?dunno if right? Me German don't hate)
- Orange for decorational purposes
Recipe:
First get a tall glass, pour the sugar in it, wash the mint and stick it in there.
Get your favourite cocktail shaker, pour all the liquor in it (the Tequile, Wodka, Gin and Rum) + the orangejuice and icecubes. Shake 20 seconds and dance while shaking, also don't forget to try out eating your devRant Stressball (Leave note in comments who gets this reference).
After shaking pure the "semi cocktail" into the glass with the mint and sugar. Get your masher (I guess this is the right word?) and mash your mintleaves with the sugar and the cocktail. Afterwards, fill the glass mostly up with sodawater.
Now the trickey part: to make it look cool, get your Barspoon and the Grenadine Syrup. Stick the spoon in the glass and let syrup slowly flow in the cocktail, this will make the "red shine" shown in the image attached to this rant.
Finally, stick an orange slice on the glass and enjoy!
My Impression: It's a bit stronger than a normal Tequila Sunrise, but better for the people which don't like sour or "liquor only cocktails".
Thanks to @cafecortado and @CoffeeNcode but also the other commentators!
(An image of the ingredients will be attached as comment)
EDIT: @oudalally mentioned it correctly JES it tastes very sweet!
8 -
Even Google can make mistakes.
go to gmaps.de and have fun with an nginx error sponsored by big G.
Normally, it should redir to the Google Maps page4 -
Many years ago, when I moved from a semi-experienced developer to an absolute beginner project manager at another company, my very first project was an absolute clusterfuck.
The customer basically wanted to scrape signups to their EventBrite events into their CRM system. The fuckery began before the project even started, when I was told my management that we HAD to use BizTalk. It didn't matter that we had zero experience with BizTalk, or that using BizTalk for this particular project was like using a stealth bomber to go down to the shops for a bottle of tequila (that's one for fans of Last Man on Earth). It's designed to be used by an experienced team of developers, not a small inexperienced 1-person dev team I had. The reason was for bullshit political reasons which I wasn't really made clear on (I suspect that our sales team sold it to them for a bazillion pounds, and they weren't using it for anything, so we had to justify us selling it to them by doing SOMETHING with it). And because this was literally my first project, I was young and not confident at all, and I wanted to be the guy who just got shit done, I didn't argue.
Inevitably, the project was a turd. It went waaay over budget and time, and didn't work very well. I remember one morning on my way to work seriously considering ploughing my car into a ditch, so that I had a good excuse not to go into work and face that bullshit project.
The good thing is that I learned a lot from that. I decided that kind of fuckery was never going to happen again.
A few months later I had an initial meeting with a potential customer (who I was told would be a great customer to have for bullshit political reasons) - I forget the details but they essentially wanted to build a platform for academic researchers to store data, process it using data processing plugins which they could buy, and commersialise it somehow. There were so many reasons why this was a terrible idea, but when they said that they were dead set on using SharePoint (SharePoint!!!) as the base of the platform, I remembered my first project and what happened.
I politely explained my technical and business concerns over the idea, and reasons why SharePoint was not a good fit (with diagrams and everything), suggested a completely different technology stack, and scheduled another meeting so they could absorb what I had said and revisit. I went to my sales and head of development and basically told them to run. Run fast, and run far, because it won't work, these guys are having some kind of fever dream, it's a clusterfuck in the making, and for some reason they won't consider not using SP.
I never heard from them again, so I assume we dropped them as a potential client. It felt amazing. I think that was the single best thing I did for that company.
Moral of the story: when technology decisions are made which you know are wrong, don't be afraid to stand up and explain why.
3 -
-Rant-
How do you (not) secure your Rest based web service?
1. Chain it to shady organic authentication system built by a hoard of monkeys high on Tequila.
2. have secret keys that get copy pasted into config flat files, and index them on your code search engine.
3. make the onboarding extremely platform specific that you need 500 environment variables, 50 scripts, 5 fancy device presses and a tap dance to make a GET call to the service.
4. fish through 500 rotating log files that the authentication system generates for each API call made.
5. Leave traces all over the host so if you have to start over, you should sudo rm -rf / and set fire to your computer. -
This semester, we have a lecture called IT Security by a guy, who absolutely know his subject.
Nevertheless, he wanted to show us that sha256 is broken by an existing collision. (Google that, fellow ranters!)
There are two pdf files by google researchers, that show the caption „SHAttered“ both on different backgrounds, although they give the same SHA-hash.
He then tried to share us these two files by moodle and wondered, why he uploaded the same file twice.
Guess what happened? The moodle backend checks new uploaded files for their ... hash ... and then decides, weather to upload or the file is already existing. So, it did just a new symlink to the old file.
Ironic, that an exercise, that should show us sha collision failures on sha collision 😃5 -
Just suggested to the question on how to merge pdfs to a single large one to use MS Word for that.
It was a Linux only group.
I live dangerous in other ways as well. -
imagine, you are Stack overflow. You are down. How should you now solve your issues, when you cannot search Stack overflow? *mind blowing* *World exploding*
3 -
Come on guys, I want to gather deadly One-Liner for Linuxsystems. Maybe someone has some more creative ways than the standard ones below.
1. rm -rf / —no-preserves-root
2. echo . > /dev/sda
(3). :(){ :|: & };:
4. mv / /dev/null4 -
People are up doing tequila sunrise and getting smashed in the early mornings. And I'm over here happy to be working on some code.4
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Working as an cooperative student in an big IT company. I shall continue the work of another student (Something in Frontend Visualization) for their Sharepoint sites.
The other student wrote a fucking 40 page university evaluation (requirements, first architecture and sl on) about the concept of this project and did not have the time to implement it.
But instead of giving me this research paper, my advisors say “Be creative and don’t use this work. Do it by your own.”
wtf? Why has this student even done all of this work and why do I have to waste many hours in order to begin everything from day zero??2 -
There is a subreddit collecting media scenes which shows “hackers” and discussing them.
https://reddit.com/r/...: -
Supportportal is offline.
Boss tries 5 mins to create a ticket, that Supportportal is not reachable.
Mysterious,that that does not work.
Writes a colleague, that he should open a ticket for him. 🤦♀️1 -
What Software do you guys use for drawing (beautiful!) architecture diagrams (Layer Diagrams) for complex software?
I know the standard tools for UML Modelling (starUML, UMLet, even Visio/ppt etc.), but drawing components is not really sexy with them (especially, when it comes ro including logos,...)😃
Are there any good tutorials for using gimp/inkscape or even own tools for this?4 -
A lot of people have asked me to do their coding assignments for them. Ignoring the fact, that this lack of knowledge will not give good results in the next exam, i have done that a few times for my relatives.
So, being asked by externals I wont do that for free. (7-10h of workload) My question, what would you guys demand for such tasks. Is it worth the effort (students are poor)?3 -
rather wait for next gen mobile gpu (gtx 2070 max q,...) before buying a laptop or now, because of some good after-xmas-sales?
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!rant
Old but Gold. One of the nerdiest things, I’ve ever heard🙃Must share it with you...
https://youtu.be/JimUMZTiAjo1
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