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Keep this between us, but I got sexually assaulted in a work party by a very old guy who worked at the venue.
I didn't bring it up because a) I had already resigned from that company and was on my notice period, and b) I was going to leave the country in a few weeks and couldn't be arsed having to think about it on my vacation or even after.
Still pretty awkward with myself because after that, the very drunk me got emotionally unhinged, went outside and cried my eyes out for no reason. 😐
Like, it wasn't even the worst assault that has ever happened to me so what was the hysterical crying and panic about ffs?19
A lot of times during holiday parties, I meet new people.
Afterwards, often a quick group chat is created to share pictures with all the people there.
Every goddamn time we come at this point again where this is done and since WhatsApp is nearly considered a requirement to function in society (Netherlands) and I refuse to use it and other mainstream media...
The moment that I have to explain why I don't use WhatsApp arrives, yet again. I don't find it awkward anymore but it doesn't improve the atmosphere and getting called paranoid for the rest of the party also isn't the most fun thing ever!
In the end I usually get the pictures emailed.19
At a festival where I was with my GF from back then, I asked her whether it was OK if I drank some more, which she was fine with, but she didn't get the implication.
Later in the tent, when I was totally drunken, she turned me around and wanted some action. The sudden movement didn't go well, I was just able to open the tent, vomited out of the tent, and turned around to continue sleeping.6
So we've been on our Christmas holidays/vacation and decided to spend New year's eve at my place barbecuing.
Yes needless to say that we got somewhat intoxicated, had steak etc and then fucking fell asleep on the floor outside.
In -3 C°.
Woke up like 20 minutes later according to my friends.
Decided to continue barbecuing but since the fire turned into half dead embers I decided to fucking chop up some wooden planks laying around.
New year's Eve.
Chopped up planks in the dead of night.
Continued barbecuing afterwards.
Fire ablaze again, roasted the remainder of the meat and since it was too boring for me I decided to pour fucking Korn, (German alcohol) over the flames.
Needless to say my arm hairs burnt off.
Friend comes out, sees me, fucking dies of laughter.
All promised to stfu about it.
Anyway the flamed steak and stuff were still delicious.8
None of my awkward party stories are thoroughly dev-related, but here goes
So my high school friends and I gather for an annual Christmas Party (technically it's Advent Party if my trad brain is to go by) and we invite special guests from the rest of the class.
Two, maybe five years ago, it was this classmate of ours who went home to Manila from New Zealand for the holidays. She came over.
We have this custom called the exchange gift where we would buy each other gifts. I picked her. Her wishlist indicated that she would love to read some fiction. She didn't indicate any specific titles.
I am also such a fan of Tom Clancy's books that I have nearly all of his books, games, and movies. I was certain that she has not read a single Tom Clancy book since her titles usually are Twilight, Fifty Shades of Gray, and Stephen King type of books.
So I went to the nearest secondhand book store to buy her several Tom Clancy books. I also picked a brand new random romance title just to sweeten the gift. I wanted her to read as many books as possible.
Then the time came to give each other gifts.
She opened my gift for her and she pasted the fakest glee ever. I didn't mind.
But when it was time for her to go, she went for the door only to be stopped by a friend of ours saying that she forgot my gift of her.
She gave it a leering look before seemingly grudgingly taking it to her arms and leaving. Whether she didn't like my gift because most of them were secondhands is anyone's guess. It was awkward as hecc.
You should have specified titles you know. Also bitch I love Tom Clancy.
2) family reunions. The usual member of the extended family, usually a boomer aunt, asking you the following tactless questions and making the following assessments:
>"Tumaba ka na ah!" (Wow [Jenny] you've grown fat!)
>"Kumusta na yung chekwa mong jowa?" (How's your ching chong boyfriend? Chekwa is a much more offensive slur than ching chong if you account Tagalog culture)
>"So when are you getting married? You know if you've been dating for more than a year you should either marry your boyfriend or dump him."
>"Why did you choose an agnostic as your new boyfriend? What happened to the trad one? He's so ugly!"
>"So have you worked in HP yet? Why don't you apply as a dev in Microsoft/Facebook/Google? Your cousin Jordan earns 80K (in philippine pesos) a month in Accenture you know."
>"Remember to help your siblings [financially] every step of the way."
Tita I am not in the mood.3
Happened just yesterday.
At 7:00pm some shared office colleagues rocked up at the building drunk, to inform me that they were having their own christmas party, since they couldnt be bothered attending ours the day before.
When I was very young, I remember I couldn't remember anyone's name.
I just yelled "HEY!" until the right guy noticed me.
(that was when I was about 5 years old.)18
Awkward holiday party story?
Not sure how awkward this is, but our company gives away some fairly nice 'prizes' at the party. Several big screen TVs, KC Royals/St. Louis Cardinals game tickets, etc, etc.
A few years ago, tax laws forces us to charge the employee tax on the items given away at the party (taxed as part of their salary). Awkward part was HR didn't tell anyone until nearly all the prizes were given out.
HRMgr: "Oh, by the way, this year we are forced to include the price of the item as part of your salary so the appropriate taxes are taken out. If you have any questions, come see me on Monday."
I swear I could hear several "WTF"'s from various tables and (to me) awkward silence.
The HR manager sent an apology email to the company saying he should have let everyone know before the party so individuals could make an informed decision about whether or not they wanted to accept the prize.4
My best mate and I got invited to an Adelaide based Christmas do which they flew us to free of charge (we are from Victoria).
It was an open bar so we needed up racking up an alcohol bill just shy of $1000, in the end we wound up having some people who were about twice our age trying to 'debug us' if you will.
A month or so later they called up asking for us and it was the most awkward thing I have ever experienced (story is quite a bit longer but not all of it is savoury .-.)1
I barely ever drink, so.. Almost every holiday party I've been in was awkward :)
there was this Christmas once where one of my family members got unexpectedly wasted and embarased me and himself in front of my newly wedded wife. A few next christmas in the fam were awkward.
There was this christmas party in my student days with othet students. Like they say, medics study hard and party hard. Everyone got wasted and fel asleep a few hours past midnight. We had lectures next morning so I didn't sleep [as I was the only one sober and had] to wake everyone up for 9am lectures. Never ever had I attended such parties since.
At even younger age [high school] I was in a new year party. Incidentaly only couples were there. Soo.. After the fireworks went off - the lights were turned off and all I could hear were kissing and other noises of this kind. Everyone's wasted ofc, but me
needless to say now I'm very picky who to celebrate with. A closest family, a glass of bubbly or some hot wine is enough and I'm comfortable with everyone.1
After roasting a pig with a nice honey tun at camping, I went to take a shower...
As shower was pretty relaxing (warm water), I dazed off a bit.
Suddenly the curtain opened, and a friend of mine who wanted to clean the grill stood in front of me...
Wearing two pink gloves, going straight up to the elbow, a bottle of grease remover in the other hand....
Awkward... Is an understatement....
After being mortified we both laughed like lunatics...2
On New Year's Eve a few years back I was around 21/22 and my friends were anywhere between 20/25.
My best friend has a big house so he offered to host it there (as every year pretty much), so we all agreed to do dinner and party after.
We decided to go with barbecue, and we all brought a few things.
Without my knowledge, they are all pretty much gamers and also decided to bring their laptops and even towers to play during the whole day and night.
The result was me "alone" cooking with the dad of a female friend (whose wife died a few years back and offered to help since he would be pretty much alone or with some other family members, not sure).
Once we finished cooking and went on to calling them, no one came to eat because "they were finishing just one more game", and eventually the dad yelled at them and left, I just went eating by myself, and they all showed up a few minutes later looking like 5 year olds when dads scream at them.
I can pretty much say that was the weirdest thing ever, but they did learn because never again they did the same!8
In a place that i worked we decided to made a xmas lunch/party just with TI.
So, we did a BBQ at boss house.
While we were waiting for the lunch, that "boss's favorite guy" takes a mic and start to make fun of all people in the party... ONE BY ONE, in a really tougth way.
Everyone was upset, just the boss and "that guy" were laughting. So people just started to leave.
It's a shame know people that feels good with itself when jokes with mates disabilities...3
Um, when are holiday party stories not awkward?
Like seriously, it's as if murphy's law intensifies ten-fold anytime there's a tangible reference point for everyone and their mama to remember it by 🙄