Favourite place to work on my code?

Probably PyCharm

Cocaine

Cocaine

Family reaction to me becoming a dev?

“Hey, can you fix my printer plz”

Lmao probably the time I worked 150 hours over two weeks (had to sleep on the job) for a project. During delivery I worked 09-22 during the weekend (unpaid) while my boss was out on his boat.

WORST interaction with management?

Wouldn’t it be more rare to find a GOOD interaction, am I right fellas?

Adding a feature to 18 000 undocumented lines of code, written in PL/SQL. Oh, did I mention it was just a single function?

Lmao I’ve never learned how to program. I’m just winging it and have been able to fool everyone the last 10 years.

Senior engineer checking in.

”Are you planning on having kids in the near future?”

Literally (very) illegal to ask where I live. Too bad I was too young to understand the severity of him asking.

Worst place I’ve ever worked.

It’s actually pretty neat. I constantly suffer from impostor syndrome, so I always have keep learning to keep up the facade.

> Drops production database.
> Wait for chaos to ensue.
“It’s just a prank, bro”

Sharing this, since I made this during paid working hours.

Had to wake four people up at 2 am to fix a crashing service.

10/10 would deploy to production on Friday night again.

I became good enough to be hired as a developer by reinventing lots of wheels and making mistakes. A lot of mistakes.

“The documentation of this API is left as an exercise to the reader.”

When you have to beg your team for approval on your pull request.

I once added a semicolon at the end of a line when coding in Python.

I’ve brought shame on my family.

Told the recruiter about 4 times before my lunch interview that I was a working student (I could only take part time jobs).

Just as we sat down and got our food he asked me where I currently worked, and I gently reminded him that I was still, in fact, a student.

He had this weir look on his face as I had tried to trick him into a free lunch, as all the positions he had was for full time jobs.

Still ate the lunch and had awkward small talk the entire time.

Biggest dev insecurity?

Probably http://
It’s not secure at all, never feeling very confident when browsing that protocol.

Favourite code editor?
Hands down, it’s actually Vim.

It’s mostly because I haven’t been able to exit it though. Actually it’s the only reason. I’m stuck. Someone please send help.

So, I was out cruising in my sports car the other day. Porsche, two seater, about 400 hp.

When I stopped at a red light I was next to a man driving his family of four in his Volkswagen. I revved my car to show my power, but he seemed unfazed by my superior engine. When the light became green I floored it, he didn't have a chance of catching up, I just left him behind and laughed. He's so stupid for driving that slow car.

I can't understand why anyone would ever want to drive a Volkswagen when they are just so obviously slow?

👆This is how you sound like when you compare languages only based on how fast they are.

Due to the coronavirus we are currently required to develop all our web services with SOAP and sanitise all our input for at least 20 seconds.

When you've been getting lots of comments on your pull request and have to keep asking for approval.

I love it when recruiters write personal messages and use my real name ❤️

Booting up my Windows computer at work after 1 year leave. I'm gonna do a Windows Update.

I suspect I'm not going to get anything else done today.

I'm currently reading a course in Project Management and I have yet to find an image in the course literature with a person that doesn't suffers from a headache.

Let's just say that all my all-nighters have been caused by Internet Explorer.

OMFG it happened again. I'm always very explicit with recruiters that I don't take full time employment while I'm studying. This one was very understanding about it and said he found a great match for my skillset.

I just had a meeting with the CEO of this great match of a company.
- "No, we only seek people who can work full time, let's keep in touch when you've graduated".

What the fuck, way to waste everyones time.

I don't know how many hours in a row it was, but one month I put down about 340 hours of work.

My boss had taken upon this massive project with a deadline at the end of the month. I basically lived at the office (I actually spent the night there more than once), meanwhile he was out sailing.

What the fuck, it says on both my LinkedIn profile and on my CV that I'm a student but I can take on part time projects, and I also told a recruiter the same thing over phone (after he found me on LinkedIn).

Today I had lunch with said recruiter. Guess who had no clue I was a student?