Ed is responsible for servers in the IT department at work. He is an electrical that does a lot of electronic/electrical design work. So IT concerns are not as high as his design work. Today we had a server fail due to aging hardware. We have another guy that handles IT stuff for Ed. So I went to the IT guy and said:

So I understand the server has Electronic Dysfunction. Is Ed having trouble keeping his server up?

We have a new game my coworker Landon and I are playing. There are two high use restrooms near our offices. There is another coworker (male) that likes to use these restrooms. If the toilet seat is left up he will go into the restroom and slam the toilet seat down. I have no idea if he is angry or just oblivious when slamming the seat down.

The game is to see how many slams we can get in a day. We will go "reset" the board when nobody is in there. (Resetting being lifting the seat up.) The current record is 4 slams in one day. We nearly got 5 yesterday. The clock literally ran out and there was no overtime yesterday.

Yes, this is a stupid game. We laugh our asses off every time we hear the seat slam down. We are taking friendly bets as to when the seat or the bowl breaks from the repeated trauma.

Note: the slamming coworker is in a wheel chair. AITAH?

So there is this discussion about killing children in code. Someone pops in with this:
"I do remember a post from a guy who actually got pulled into an HR talk, to ask why he'd littered the code with references to killing children and removing children from their parents. Imagine trying to explain to a person who's never programmed, that Kill(parent.child)is a perfectly standard phrasing and not a latent psychosis that should be reported to the police."

First I think who is the idiot that reported this? Then I think who is the HR idiot that didn't do a google search or talk to the software manager? So many people had to fail at basic thinking for this to get this far.

Then I think also. Two things can be true at the same time. The person writing this code could also harbor latent desires to kill children. But can hide their sickness in plain sight. CS could just be a place for psychopaths to talk about the true serial killer thoughts.

I was wondering what this would look like. Maybe the psycho programmer will allocate extra hidden children that will get created and destroyed without anyone knowing the better. Maybe they only need 10 children for the code, but they allocate 100. That is 90 children they can create and destroy that only they know about.

Is balancing a tree really about cycles to read the data? Or is this some sort of karma balancing with latent desires to add or remove children with different karma leanings? Linked lists? Obviously only a psychopath would make a singly linked list.

Then I read posts on devrant and think there is probably at least one psychopath here that looks up to Anakin. We know you are here! You can't hide forever.

I’m really going to miss this place ._.
It feels like a piece of me is dying.

No to crapple, yes to snapple.

I regret persuing Software Engineering as a career.

I am not sure how to grow. I graduated in 2020, been doing mobile(Android) development for last 5 years and after 2 switches, am stuck in a typical micromanaging toxic company with an average package and this is sucking the life out of me.

I don't feel excited about my domain. Earlier I had this twinkle in my eyes everyday I wake up, wanting to tackle the next big challange, explore the next unexplored area in tech. But now am in crisis

Firstly My domain(Android) itself is challenging. continuously evolving and people wanting to move to shiny stuff instead of what works. Wasn't technology the tool to fix problems? Why is it inventing problems?

2ndly when and where is one supposed to "live life"? i wake up at 6.30, leave for office at 7.30, reach office at 9.30, leave from office at 6 and reach home at 8.30 .

take 1 hour of dinner 1 hour of freshen up, and 6 hrs of sleep and poof! almost whole day is gone! why am i spending 20+ hours in a routine that isn't giving me any happiness?

I can't go to gym , I can't goto park to walk, I can't read a book, I can't make some side business/hobby, I can't play some ps game or go hang out with friends/family. is this normal?

Either am at an illusion that :
1. there are some companies that allow one to achieve all this with their remote work or
2. there are professions/business which allow this or
3. there are government job employees who love like this.

or everyone is doomed like me and we are all looking to die at early 50s. I sometimes think even a farmer is not that in pressure as us.

Lastly the work pressure to proof oneself every damn minute and the office politics. I just want to get out of this rat race

Wow, compared to youtube, people on devRant are actually a sane and friendly bunch.
Shoutout to the crazy idiots here, I love you all! 😄

This is AMOLED display at 250x zoom.

JoyRant build 40

* Added spam detection!
* Fixed weird black background in encountered users view
* Fixed aspect ratio of placeholder user image

Spam is detected using a spam score system.
Specific words and patterns increase the score and once a threshold is reached, the rant is considered spam.

In the feed spam rants will be less visible (max 3 lines of text, smaller and half transparent text and no images) but you can still open the rant (maybe to check the full rant to see if it is really spam) and downvote.

This can be disabled in Settings but is enabled by default.

It’s phase 1 of the spam related feature.
I will approach phase 2 later since it‘s low priority for me.

Feel free to contribute to the spam detection config file via PR:
https://github.com/WilhelmOks/...

Never really had issues with Java, but this is so funny to me.

To date, the high score for toilet seat slams is 5 in one day. Not sure we will ever beat that score.

ai apocalypse my ass

Idea for a next gen image compression method:

* Put your image into a reverse AI image generator to get the prompt for that image.
* store the text string as the compressed image
* Put the text string into to AI image generator to get back your compressed image.

evidently

My wife just told me she loved regexes… should I get a divorce?

Maybe not exactly what would happen, but not wrong either. At the end of the day, these two fields are different.

No work today....

Was a tad depressed yesterday and couldn't get any serious work done, so I start doing random chores to distract myself. Fixed my urxvt extension to correctly toggle fullscreen on and off, and then I remember that the reason I have a black desktop background is I couldn't stretch the terminal to cover the whole screen, so it looked weird.

Well, not a problem anymore, so let's have something more colorful. I have this image of the eastern veil nebula laying around, for no real reason other than I thought it looked pretty. Used to be my desktop background. Let's make it so once more, enable terminal transparency, turn opacity down to 82%; now I have something other than code and the void to look at.

But curious as to what this nebula is, I g*^gle it out. I don't believe in astromambo, but I do find it funny that it's in Cygnus, because that's a swan, and the mascot for my projects is a swan too -- not because of the constellation, but because I suck at drawing.

See, my mom is a sabuner, I mean soaper. She makes olive oil soap. And we had an old box of Nablus soap in the house, which we kept because it's pretty, and the front of this box had a picture of an ostrich, drawn in bright red. I tried to base my logo on it but it ended up looking more like a swan than an ostrich; I accepted my failure and decided then and there that this would be the mascot.

It's a multitude of little relationships between things I never really thought I could relate to one another. This is utterly random shit and it cheers me up.

Anyhoo moral of the story is nebulae are fucking cool.

I thought my laptop was going crazy, but it was just my CAT laying on my wireless keyboard that was in another room!

What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant.

It is only now that I can finally appreciate how brilliant PHP is.

When you're new to programming, you write some HTML + CSS, it looks good, but the dynamic part is missing. So, you install PHP and just… write dynamic parts right in your HTML? How crazy is that? You can even write regular code there too! Errors are logged right away, common features like DB driver and sessions are built in…

It's all about marketing. Next.js does exactly the same thing when they brag about writing SQL in React. When they do it, it's revolutionary. When PHP does it, PHP bad. Gotcha fam 🫤

I fucking give up, AWS is retarded. It's the worst piece of shit retarded fucking platform ever created and every fucking engineer that touched the code should have their fingers chopped off, shoved down their throats and then be beheaded.

I can't believe that this retarded shit is the "industry standard" for deploying anything ever. Every fucking page feels and uses as if it was fucking outsourced to a different part of india everytime. The fucking pagination behaves differently in every fucking service. Half of the new services just gave up and run on their own fucking thing, because presumably their own platform just couldn't even handle it anymore and fucking CloudFormation is the fucking kingpin of this entire retarded platform. Slapping and unslapping shit together unttil it fucking get's stuck in an unresolvable state because half the fucking services need 58 unrelated permissions to perform a simple delete.

Fuck AWS, Fuck Amazon, Fuck Bezos, Fuck the Cloud and Fuck this whole "Serverless" scam. I really truly wish everyone that had anything to do with making AWS a reality just drop dead on the spot right now so that we can forget that aws ever happened.

I’m on this ticket, right? It’s adding some functionality to some payment file parser. The code is atrocious, but it’s getting replaced with a microservice definitely-not-soon-enough, so i don’t need to rewrite it or anything, but looking at this monstrosity of mental diarrhea … fucking UGH. The code stink is noxious.

The damn thing reads each line of a csv file, keeping track of some metadata (blah blah) and the line number (which somehow has TWO off-by-one errors, so it starts on fucking 2 — and yes, the goddamn column headers on line #0 is recorded as line #2), does the same setup shit on every goddamned iteration, then calls a *second* parser on that line. That second parser in turn stores its line state, the line number, the batch number (…which is actually a huge object…), and a whole host of other large objects on itself, and uses exception throwing to communicate, catches and re-raises those exceptions as needed (instead of using, you know, if blocks to skip like 5 lines), and then writes the results of parsing that one single line to the database, and returns. The original calling parser then reads the data BACK OUT OF THE DATABASE, branches on that, and does more shit before reading the next line out of the file and calling that line-parser again.

JESUS CHRIST WHAT THE FUCK

And that’s not including the lesser crimes like duplicated code, misleading var names, and shit like defining class instance constants but … first checking to see if they’re defined yet? They obviously aren’t because they aren’t anywhere else in the fucking file!

Whoever wrote this pile of fetid muck must have been retroactively aborted for their previous crimes against intelligence, somehow survived the attempt, and is now worse off and re-offending.

Just.
Asdkfljasdklfhgasdfdah

I kinda want to quit programming and restore vintage bicycles instead.

save him ...

windows users...

We love each other so much.

If a vacuum is performing poorly, does it suck?

I am trying to check the popularity of the "PDF" religion myself after seeing similar post on IG recently.

Bring the wizard!

So I'm sitting on the swings, minding my own business, seing how best I could destroy this cluster of servers, when suddenly I notice SOMEONE IS COMING FOR MY COFFEE

"hi neighbour! What you've got there"