So I accidentally published my AWS keys to GitHub, stupid me. I realize this the next day.

$ git reset
$ git push
Reset keys in AWS

I was too late. Bot already stole the keys and started up 53 EC2 instances. Racked up $4000+ of compute time (probably Bitcoin mining, I'd assume)

4 weeks later, I finally have this shit disputed and settled.

Don't test with hardcoded keys. You WILL forget about them. Env vars always. That is all.

Google: The SHA-1 collision is the biggest news today
Cloudflare: Hold my beer
AWS: Call me your daddy

Then they say

Well I was in search for an internship and there was this Remote one posted online giving Rs1000(14$) for a month.

All he wanted was a fully functional clone of Coursera with hosted on AWS with videos of around 2-3TB streaming from S3 in a month :)

I asked him about his AWS costs and he replied - "Use the Internship money I'm giving you it won't cost much."

Wrote some codes that uses your photos to compose an input image. Will post code later. Written in Python though. Also this is my dad. Also I wrote this in Yellowstone cuz I didn't like the view lol.

Trying to work with AWS

*casually clicking through aws services*

*discoveres ses (email service)*

*tries it out as email driver in laravel project*

*discoveres you are in sandbox by default, means you can only send emails to yourself*

*reads documentation, says to get out of sandbox request a limit increase with default values*

// 200 per day, max 1 per second

*request what is mentioned*

*while waiting, find threads of people with the most well documented use case requests getting denied*

*pretty sure i will be denied to, thinking of starting to look elsewhere*

// next morning

*opens mail*

# your application is now out of sandbox and can now send 50k emails a day with a max of 14 per second.

Now this is what I love to see whenever I start the terminal

configuring nginx is like trying anal for the first time

I built a spherical voronoi minesweep

A picture is better than a thousand words

Wrote some code during the break that transform an image to the following styles, is it good enough to post on github?

gonna be a poor boy

"AWS S3 is doing better than ever"

- Donald J. Trump

Not code related, but.....
When you open a pron site and see this

Guess I should save the planet instead of jerking off

What do you call a spider in the jungle?... Amazon Web Services.

In a career talk about the importance of the IT industry:
Speaker: "Who here uses AWS?"
*I'm the only one who raised my hand in a hall of ~100 IT students*
Speaker: "Good, you are a geek that everyone should aim to be!"
Ummmm… Is that a compliment…? Why do I feel a bit offended…

This is very usual with AWS

So I was applying for a research position in linguistic department, and had the interview today.
Prof: So you know excel right

Me: (show a project to him to prove I at least know csv file)
Prof: Ok so you know excel.

Me: Yeah kinda.

Prof: Ok that's good. Cuz right now we are using amazon Turk, and the data they returned, which are excel files, are not really the way we want it.

Me: Ok sounds like a parser can fix it......

Prof: Yeah.... the students in the lab are doing it manually now

(Dead silence)

Prof: Ok move onto next matter

Our AWS Consultant: Do you have the AWS CLI installed?
Me: Brings up the Linux subsystem in Win 10. sudo apt install awscli.
Me thirty seconds later: Yes.

My six word horror story.

We switched from aws to azure

When you see your AWS bill for the development environment only

AWS is so complicated, it could be a full-time job to only understand all their names and stuff

At my old job, me and a colleague were tasked with designing a new backup system. It had integrations for database systems, remote file storage and other goodies.
Once we were done, we ran our tests, and sure enough. The files and folder from A were in fact present at B and properly encrypted. So we deployed it.
The next day, after the backup routine had run over night, I got to work and noone was able to log in. They were all puzzled.
I accessed a root account to find the issue. Apparantly, we had made a mistake!
All files on A were present at B... But they were no longer present at A.
We had issued 'move' instead of 'copy' on all the backups. So all of peoples files and even the shared drives have had everything moved to remote storage :D
We spent 4 hours getting everything back in place, starting with the files of the people who were in the office that day.
Boss took it pretty well at least, but not my proudest moment.

*Stay tuned for the story of how I accidentally leaked our Amazon Web Services API key on stack overflow*

/facepalm

>Deploys new image at OpenShift Online
> 3 seconds passed
> "your pod is stuck for more than 5 minutes"

excuse me wtf

I work for a "Visionary" in our org. Motherfucker will use something for five minutes and decided it's the new-hot, and off we go chasing it.

"I did a Python + AWS tutorial last night, I get it. We need to start migrating everything to Lambda today."

A week later he hits his first error message that needs more than five minutes of work to solve and we're moving to a local Haskell stack.

I wish there is such thing as branch in a relationship. So that whenever a couple are having a fight, they can create a branch and work their shit out in that branch and eventually merge to the master branch.

Wait
Merge....
That just costs.... more conflicts

When you type chmod 777 / instead of chmod 777 ./ on an AWS EC2 instance and have to unmount the volume attach it to a new instance reconfigure the permissions unmount it and connect it back to the original instance :)

Brace yourselves, Amazon S3 memes/rants are coming! :D

Finally installed Ubuntu and successfully configured the wifi setting, any package I should install?

So today was the worst day of my whole (just started) career.

We have a huge client like 700k users. Two weeks ago we migrated all their services to our aws infrastructure. I basically did most of the work because I'm the most skilled in it (not sure anymore).

Today I discovered:
- Mail cron was configured the wrong way so 3000 emails where waiting to be sent.
- The elastic search service wasn't yet whitelisted so didn't work for two weeks.
- The cron which syncs data between production db en testing db only partly worked.

Just fucking end me. Makes me wonder what other things are broken. I still have a lot to learn... And I might have fucked their trust in me for a bit.

Apple pays $30 million a month to use AWS, CNBC reports.

Was looking for virtual credit card for testing out AWS. Came across this wallet and while signup...

God damn I love sublime merge

Wk1:, Client wants stack deployed to AWS in a day... Does it in 30 minutes...

Wk2: client complains about cost of service so requests I downsize the stack they asked for... Does so... Just to save some £££ at loss of any DR or HA capability

Wk3: Client wants stack moved to a different AWS account just cos... Advised could cause issues... Client says carry on. Migrates to account as requested on the days they requested.

Wk4: client complains that said migration caused issues and that proper change control wasn't followed..... That was never informed on..

Wk5: issue discovered to actually be network fault linked to clients wanting every £££ saved in AWS... And as the stack specialist I still have to write up a summary and findings?

Wow just get a decent AWS admin will ya....

Holy fucking dickballs, AWS cloud platform is one of the most UX unfriendly piles of fuckery I have witnessed.

It starts off okay and then you have to use it for many hours a day.
API gateway is assfucked backwards in its layout and how it displays. Why have things go horizontally across the screen rather than flow down so I can scroll. Also when I add a method to a resource why the god damn fuck do I need to select it from the smallest drop down imaginable when you have HALF MY POXY SCREEN TAKEN UP IN LITERAL WHITESPACE NEXT TO IT.

Now I get on to the dynamodb interface whoever designed must have been some form of insane cause it is as clunky as a donkey in clogs.

Finally, Lambda console, look I get it UX is not you strong point. but WHO IS THE SADISTIC FUCKOFF WHO WANTED TO HAVE TWO SCROLLABLE TEXT AREAS THAT CAN NOT BE FUCKING EXPANDED SO I CAN SEE MORE THAN FOUR LINES OF THE FUCKING OUTPUT.

*grumble* 12hrs a day of this bullshit *grumble*

Doing linguistic research where I need to parse 2000 files of a total of 36 GB. Since we are using python the first thing I thought was to implement multi threading. Now I changed the total runtime from three days to like one day and a half. But then when I checked the activity monitor I saw only 20 percent of the CPU usage. After a searching process I started to understand how multi threading and multi processing works. Moral of the story: if you want to ping a website till they block you or do easy tasks that will not use up all power of one core, do multi thrading. If you need to do something complicated that can easily consume all the powers of a single CPU core, split up the work and do multi processing. In my case, when I tried to grab information from a website, I did multi thrading since the work is easy and I really wanted to pin the website 16 times simultaneously but only have 4 cores. But when it come to text processing which a single file will take 80 percent of cpu, split it up and do multi processing.

This is just a post for those who are confused with when to use which.

Client: we need a big data implementation in AWS to be fully HA and DR.... Money is no object

*3 weeks later when the bill comes in *

Client: its too expensive we don't need this HA stuff we don't even know what it stands for anyhow so can you take it out? But the system still needs 24/7 availability....

First time setting up https and I be like:

You know, the whole AWS outage being caused by a typo while debugging got me thinking... whoever did that is most probably a developer who had a REALLY bad day. Could that person be on DevRant? Because the story of what the rest of that day and week was like for him or her has the chance to be the most epic rant on here ever. Poor guy/gal.

Now here comes my first zsh shell plugin. Its called dogesay and it will repeat your command with much, wow, nice...

Just seen this in my LinkedIn, savoring my fifteen minutes of fame.

I didn't even know what photography is a month ago. Then I was going on a road trip with my girlfriend so I bout a camera. Didn't read the manual just watched bunch of videos and realized it was just tuning parameters. Now I'm the master.

My personal AWS account just got suspended and it was the most terrifying thing ever.

It's back up now and reactivated once I paid up. Just a bounced payment on an old account caused it but for any of you out there who have this fear this what happens:

1. Amazon email you with reminders every few days.

2. The emails change to give a shut off date.

3. Your account is then locked after that date.

4. If you want imminent attention you have to pay $49 to talk to them.

Bonus tip : go to their billing page on your account, this isn't locked and allows you to pay up without paying the support fee.

Good luck!

So it's Saturday.

We're doing a data centre move today. Everything was hosted in a data centre in Derby and we're shutting that all off and migrating everything to new domains in AWS. Every site, every app, everything.

We've tested this week and only this last week. It raised issues every time and nobody feels particularly confident about the move.

If things fuck up badly enough, were in a lot of trouble. Everything is business critical and we only have until Sunday evening to fix it.

What could possibly go wrong?

Sooooo.. Aws's route53 and ELB outage nuked all our environments. 503 here, 503 there, 5xx everywhere.

Just sitting and picking nose for we've got nothing else to do now.. Who on the fucking earth thought it might be a great idea to centralize the whole fucking internet into 3 companies' hands!?!

How's your day?

TL; DR: Bringing up quantum computing is going to be the next catchall for everything and I'm already fucking sick of it.

Actual convo i had:

"You should really secure your AWS instance."

"Isnt my SSH key alone a good enough barrier?"

"There are hundreds of thousands of incidents where people either get hacked or commit it to github."

"Well i wont"

"Just start using IP/CIDR based filtering, or i will take your instance down."

"But SSH keys are going to be useless in a couple years due to QUANTUM FUCKING COMPUTING, so why wouldnt IP spoofing get even better?"

"Listen motherfucker, i may actually kill you, because today i dont have time for this. The whole point of IP-based security is that you cant look on Shodan for machines with open SSH ports. You want to talk about quantum computing??!! Lets fucking roll motherfucker. I dont think it will be in the next thousand years that we will even come close to fault-tolerant quantum computing.

And even if it did, there have been vulnerabilities in SSH before. How often do you update your instance? I can see the uptime is 395 days, so probably not fucking often! I bet you "dont have anything important anyways" on there! No stored passwords, no stored keys, no nothing, right (she absolutely did)? If you actually think I'm going to back down on this when i sit in the same room as the dude with the root keys to our account, you can kindly take your keyboard and shove it up your ass.

Christ, I bet that the reason you like quantum computing so much is because then you'll be able to get your deepfakes of miley cyrus easier you perv."

Idk if anyone here noticed.... sudo sounds like 速度 in Chinese, which means quickly. So the every time I use this command I just feel like I'm rushing computer to do something for me

Just got AWS free subscription, had fun for 30 mins. Now I don't know what to do with it. Can someone give me idea for something to do with it.

Well AWS UI looks like a perfect place to hide my Horcruxes !

So I finished my first semester in NYU as a CD master. During the first semester I took a class called heuristic problem solving. Every week a competitive game will be introduced to us, and will be played in two weeks. And trust me, the games aren't easy. I teamed up with another guy who I had no idea was and named our team as we don't know. At the end of the semester we won seven out of nine games, and by won I meant that we beat the whole class in the match. And my teammate became a really good friend.

By telling this story, I want to make a point. I love problem solving, and not problems in a algorithm book where you apply an algorithm and do some trick to solve it, but real world problem where you hope for the best and anticipate, predict your opponent's move. However, American's school system doesn't teach that.

When I applied to graduate school, no school wanted me because I have an average GPA of 3.6, and no outstanding achievements. I can solve problems in my dream becaus I have an active mind, I can propose solution to a project one month before my teammates realized they essentially were doing what I told them the solution should be. But so what, I can't write those on my application.

One of the professor told me that my professor shared the story of my team during a faculty dinner, and they were very impressed by our achievement. So I guess I'm not dumb. But after all, companies and schools will look at your transcript and decide who you are.

I love myself for having random thoughts all the time that can lead to innovative problem solving. But I also hate myself for not able to study like the good kids are.

When your team uses both scss & less in the same project

Is it safe to deploy code on Friday?

So one year ago, when I was second year in college and first year doing coding, I took this fun math class called topics in data science, don't ask why it's a math class.

Anyway for this class we needed to do a final project. At the time I teamed up with a freshman, junior and a senior. We talked about our project ideas I was having random thoughts, one of them is to look at one of the myths of wikipedia: if you keep clicking on the first link in the main paragraph, and not the prounounciation, eventually you will get to philosophy page.

The team thought it was a good idea and s o we started working.

The process is hard since noe of us knew web scraping at the time, and the senior and the junior? They basically didn't do shit so it's me and the freshman.

At the end, we had 20000 page links and tested their path to philosophy. The attached picture is a visualization of the project, and every node is a page name and every line means the page is connected.

This is the first open project and the first python project that I have ever done. Idk if it is something good enough that I can out on my resume, but definitely proud of this.

PS: if you recognize the picture, you probably know me. If you were the senior or the junior in the team, I'm not sorry for saying you didn't do shit cuz that's the truth. If you were the freshman, I am very happy to have you as a teamate.

Me waiting for Gradle to finish building

It's kinda funny how when Amazon S3 is having an issue the internet is virtually unusable.

Been developing with AWS EC2 since 2015. Have deployed multiple apps in my Ubuntu servers. And have deployed Dockerized apps into Elastic Beanstalk. And used S3 to store files.

But just because I don't know AWS Lambda, the recruiter thought I'm not qualified enough for the job.

Fml.

The folks over at Gitlab must be feeling okay today. #awsoutage #s3down

Fuuuuck you AWS!!!
If you have a feature called “termination protection” perhaps it should actually prevent an instance from being terminated!

But nooo, you add *one line* of text on a documentation unrelated to ec2 terminations saying that in this particular scenario, it will terminate your instance.

Eat a dick. Eat a bag of dicks. Eat all of the dicks you fucking turd munchers.
Now I have to manually enter a month of invoices from the order emails that were created. 😡

I got 2 phone calls from AWS, asking me for feedback about a conference I've never attended. 🤦‍♂️
👍 For AWS customer service

After talk to the professor I'm working for

Professor: well, take a break.

Me: take a break? I have to report to you next week during spring break and you just released an assignment.

Professor: well but you have three weeks for the assignment.

Me: inside: but you said start early on the assignment

Professor: take a break

Really now?
AWS, #1 cloud provider with their #1 cloud database DynamoDB, all shiny, highly dynamic NoSQL, your data schema could change any second...

then DynamoDB errors out when one of your values is an empty string? {"foo":""} is impossible to store?

Like nobody ever saw or used empty strings a a value or what? There are tons of upvotes to fix this.

I just have to imagine the Product owner standing there: "No,no,no. They are just using it wrong if their data has empty strings as value. Won't fix!"

Today we witness a Guinness record, "most heart attack count in an hour"

So at the old job, i needed support for an issue relating to Amazon S3. We used a third party Python plugin for sending files to our buckets, but had some pretty severe performance issues when trying a 2-way sync.
Naturally, I sought help on StackOverflow, and was asked to share my config. Without much thought, I pasted the config file.
Next comment made me aware that our API id and key was listed in this config (pretty rediculous to keep such private info in the same file as configuration, but oh well).
I edited my question and removed the keys, and did not think about the fact that revisions are stored.

Two weeks later, my boss asks me if I know why the Amazon bill is for 25.000$ when it used to be <100$ 😳

I've never been so scared in my life. Luckily, Amazon was nice enough to waive the entire fee, and I leaned a little about protecting vital information

Found a good use for queen's guard.

We've worked 5 months to decompose a complex and huge monolith into microservices, deployed in prod with zero defects. And finally moving to AWS, one by one.
How can i explain this work to bunch of 5 year olds? i.e. i've to present this to top level management with no tech knowledge.

I'm thinking of: Lets say a family of 6 people want to travel for 30 holidays to another country. A monolith can be equivalent to having everyone's luggage in huge bag, microservices can be packing luggage in sizable chunks acceptable by airlines.

I'm bad at explaining, can someone help with better example?

It says "See ya!"

Are you trying to be social?

I installed my first Windows servers in AWS today. And now #awsdown is trending on Twitter. I finally managed to break the internet 😳

Devrant missed mentioning AWS S3 in their stack of tools, platforms and softwares used..

So I have the new Mac book pro for 8 months now, always thought that the butterfly keyboard issue will never happen to me.

Until three days ago I noticed my space key is kinda sticky.
I have an external monitor so I don’t recall any time I spill water or food directly on the keyboard.

So I made an appointment for a walk in.

BUT this morning, I was like: man, fuck this shit and smashed the space key.

Now it’s fixed.

Good

I found that one of the pron site I visit is written in Vue .....

On AWS summit Warsaw today.

On the nth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:

1 misconfigured autoscaling group
200 unnecessary servers
29 urgent emails
3 support teams that would have fixed the problem in an hour of anybody had bothered going to them first

Ugh. Idiots. Somehow the whole issue was caused by a single full hard disk, which caused database transactions to fail, which caused the group to scale out and spin up new instances, which didn't actually fix the problem so it kept scaling until it hit the limit and then continuously failed to create new instances for several hours straight, generating loads of notification emails and generally causing problems for everyone involved.

‪Mary had a little Amazon Lambda,‬
‪It tested quite ok,‬
‪Tried to expose it with an API,‬
‪...Internal Error 500....‬

How ironic

"Amazon AWS S3 outage is breaking things for a lot of websites and apps"

AWS, Azure, Google Cloud or Digital Ocean?
Your views.

P.S: I'm noob.

AWS cert 😎

Back with more features now!
Cuz I don't have anything to do at work

This image is composed of screenshots from season three

Ok, this is my first post here...and I came here to rant - I had heard about this place, but I guess I just hadn't had a bad enough day...until today...the day I found my ec2 instance was playing hide and seek with me. I just found out that my aws billing dashboard is going to swoosh 2000rs (30$) out of my wallet. Imagine ranting about this to a layperson... ok anyway, I had taken a t2-medium (my first one ever) for a hackathon and I was just playing with the regions I guess and it somehow ended up in the ohio region. I had given IAM access to some of my teammates and they were using it. We were supposed to shutdown the instance after 1 day. The next day I check the dashboard (for N.Virginia - which is the default) and I see no running instances. I thought ok my teammates must've turned it off and I left it at that. A month after the hackathon, I login today and I have this jaw-dropping moment. I now have to pay 30$ for nothing!

Boss: so let's get AWS in to ask their advise on the new architecture, but let's not bother involving the systems architect who actually knows what is going on.

Started my new job as a devops engineer, its been al month and i have never seen the seen of aws console or travis ci, dont even have credentials for any company cloud services.

I guess i should change my job title to backend dev

Adventures in not knowing python: Episode 4!

After having finally extracted all the files I needed, figuring out where the hell they go and how they connect together I tried to plug it all into an AWS ec2 and get going. WRONG!

Every package was at least 3 years out of date. Most couldn't be downloaded directly with pip or wget (because the paths to them weren't available or were the wrong version) so I've had to find, download and scored every package to the instance. This, mind you, with no experience of Django and basically none of Python.

I've finally gotten them all in and installed and set up and checked their version against the live site. I have until tomorrow morning to get it all set up.

Wish me luck gentlemen!

It has been a long long time since I posted, a lot has happened the past couple of months.

I lost my grandfather, I got a nice dev job and God I miss ranting here. I finally published my side project and all I have to say is

AWS is a b*tch! But beautiful at the same time, had to learn a lot the old way (trial and error).

I don't have any anime pictures as I've changed phones recently but I find this picture just as awesome.

Hope you are having a great day ranters.

Me: *Writes a nice little AWS Lambda service using Java 12*

Reviewing Dev: Lambda only supports JDK 8

Me: *Dies inside and cries as I replace every occurence of var*

Can we PLEASE delete FUCKING AWS!!!

Fuck this god damn piece of shitware

My mind was blown when I found out AWS offers FPGA instances (EC2 instances)

how fucking cool is that?

AWS: Use "Easy Setup" to utilize the industries suggested preset for your database needs. (Buttons ordered first in and pre-selected).

I use easy setup as I trust amazon to abstract the granular settings and guide me through best practices rather than reading through their 600 page manual to configure an Aurora instance.

10 days later, 700$ bill comes in.
Thanks AWS 👍

Can you rant about yourself?

I was reading about the AWS outage, with little to no interest. I didn't know what it was and thus figured it wouldn't affect me.
Some time goes by and I come up with this 300++ vote post. I'm witty, I'm smart, but when I want to upload a photo it doesn't work.
Must be the app right? I restart, nope nothing. Whatever..

Sometime later I have a dashing new photo for tinder. Surely to give me all the matches. Nope, can't upload it.
Must be my phone or Internet then.
Restart everything, nothing is working. Complete madness, no devRant upvotes and I'm still single.
I surrender, give up. Which is one of the worst things to do for me as a dev.

Today. Which is the cherry on the cake. I finally see my connection to the incident. I feel stupid and annoyed by myself.
God dammit Julian, pay attention.

</rant>

When your professor invented the subject and you don't understand his lecture so you go online and search for the term and all you found is his slides from other universities when he was a professor over there.

Bought a GoDaddy.com domain for the website for our startup as a joint decision by the CEO, marketing guy and me(the Dev), cuz it basically fulfilled our needs. Got some criticism from peers and mentors for not choosing AWS. Guess who's not shitting their pants now.

So today I decided to make a EC2 instance on AWS to make a simple Apache server and a DNS server. I initialize the instance and install XAMPP and the DNS server program. I try to connect via my browser to the Apache server and it errors out with a 504. I look at the open ports on the AWS console and I opened the right ports. After 2 hours of looking at what is wrong I discover that I forgot to open the right ports on the Windows firewall. I am such a moron...

AWS I love your stuff! But please for the love of god please invest in writing better documentation!

...and they said AWS never goes down. Well developers this is a good time to sleep or catch up on tv-series. Enjoy!

Amazon's AWS support sent me an email about a request to support that I sent to billing, saying they sent it to billing. They then said they couldn't help.

I just need them to stop billing me for things I no longer use!

AWS write awful docs. The .Net SQS example code has spelling mistakes, bits missing and doesn't work.

Also would be helpful if it highlighted that the .Net Core implementation is fundamentally different.

Jerks.

I passed my AWS Architect Associate exam today! On to pro-level next!

!rant

I appreciate the aws budget alert.

My boss did not care about making things secure in our early development stage, even though I told him several times.
After 1 day our elastic search cluster was filled with random crappy data.

Fix: Apply security schemes provided by AWS

Story of my life...

Maybe I’ll make those changes tomorrow

Lab needs a crawler to download some assets, none of my business though

But why not

Haven't touched crawler for two years

Google for latest state of art

Found scrapy

I have to define a class for a crawling script?

Got scared

Went back to beautifulsoup and request

Got the job done in 20 mins

Fuck yeah

If AWS is down, rant on devRant.
If devRant is down...?

When you get to talk to anyone at Amazon hoping they bring up free AWS credits

When people say I will definitely look at the code and you get one unique viewer in a month.

Sometimes devRant likes to contradict its self.

Just set up a Pi-Hole on AWS EC2.

Fuck this Apache Server on this elastic beanstalk!!! Nginx is so much better at configuration and ease of use!!!

Every time I feel Im getting my act together (at work) there is some AWS service which I know nothing about and that totally kicks my asss

Geeez the dev ops side of things is a total void for me..

Been a tough year, perpetual crunch since March.

Leadership team sent themselves to re:Invent to blow off some steam. Devs couldn't go because we're still too deep in the shit on the product.

Already getting pings about migrating everything to whatever-the-fuck just got released by AWS.

fml, Dilbert used to be funny now it can't keep up with half the shit we pull.

AWS Free Tier

Damn, guess that password is already taken.

(They meant to tell me the password didn't meet their criteria)

When your company is still using CPanel Servers

AAAH, fucking aws. Why the fuck do you make documentation if it doesnt even make sense. I struggeled for hours to let your cock sucking Cognito work and I'm still fucking stuck. Why is there no proper documentation or tutorial available for nodejs. This pisses me the fuck off. I hate this piece of shit.

Ah... I feel better now.

Upvote if you are one of the lucky devs, which companies use Google Cloud Storage or any other AWS S3 competitor :)

When I saw a blog post said you need more than 1 cup of coffee to get AWS configuration done, I didn't believe it. Now I know... it's true. very true. It takes forever to make use of your config. By the time it's done, you already switch to something else.

So I was setting up ELK (Elasticsearch, Logstash and Kibana) all in one EC2 on AWS today for demo purposes. I had everything prepared. Elastic IP, correct security group rules, etc.

I figured I would just do quick test before writing filters and templates if I can access Kibana. So I started service for it and tried to open it with Chrome.

Timeout.

Checked config file. Compared it to documentation. Seemed good but changed some things just for sake of change. Restarted service.

Timeout.

Reverted changes I've made in config. Restarted service. Curl on localhost. It work... OK. 😐

It took me half an hour but finally I figured it out after I took my phone and opened it from there. It was working from the beginning. Stupid company network was for some reason blocking this connection. Fuck! 😡And I was restarting that poor service like crazy trying to fix something that wasn't broken.

When a code sample is so obfuscated that it's almost better to leave it alone that to properly refactor it.

Thanos goes into an AWS Bar and asks for an EC2 Instance. What will be that instance family?
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General Purpose. Why? Because everything should be balanced.

Guess what I'm testing!? 🚧

I spent hours trying to enable CORS on AWS Lambda through API gateway (it was supposed to be simple and Amazon had a nice tutorial) but it turns out that there's a known bug that makes Lambda Proxy Integrations not adhere to any setting in the API Gateway, you have to respond with the headers through the Lambda yourself.

Amazon now mentions this in the tutorial, but if you click "Enable CORS" in API Gateway, it'll show you green check marks and tell you that everything went fine, but you'll find that the Lambda does not respond with the CORS headers. They shouldn't even have "Enable CORS" as an option when you use their Lambda Proxy Integration.

Never wrote a website before

Wanted to write a website for myself just for PhD application.

Learned Vue on Saturday and wrote the website in three days.

Conclusion: fuck css

I can post the website if anyone is interested to take a look though

It drives me Insane that AWS still doesn't support Swift 3 for iOS. We're almost to the point where Apple is going to drop Swift 2 support in XCode and Amazon STILL has not gotten it.

I've started deploying Gateway APIs in Objective-C and linking them to the bridging header just so we can finally move foreword in our company and quit relying on legacy Swift support. Which is something I was really trying to avoid because we don't like mixing languages unless absolutely necessary. It's not a problem, but it's incredibly annoying to me. What IS a problem is having to start new projects already using legacy code from the very beginning.

What is amazon going to do when the next release of XCode comes out? Tell all new customers to downgrade?

Why even offer native Swift APIs if you're going to go this long and still not migrate, Amazon?!

Dear Amazon,
DocDB only allows one automatic backup per day.

Why?

That is all.

Been working on AWS for about 8 months. Always looked at Cloudformation like an Alien thing. Never thought I'd be the one diving into this Rabbit hole.

But now here I am, 3rd day, trying to Automate the whole infrastructure of my App via Cloudformation.

took few days leave from my internship

as soon as I stepped in the train, i got a call from friend saying client's site is down

on checking, found that the aws instance crashed

couldn't even check the system with ssh
after detaching the volume and attaching it with another working instance we found that the system files and directories are missing

no backup was there

i wish i could give a cactus to amazon

If you rely and hardcode IPs in AWS, you're gonna have a bad time.

Set-up a 5 node EC2 cluster in AWS; Install my dependencies on all; Add private keys between all for handshake; Submit my Hadoop job for processing; AWS closes my instance within 10 minutes of starting a job that took me almost half an hour to set-up because the master node's spot costs have reached more than 15 USD :(

Awesome, at lease devRant is up and running, where else would we all go otherwise when the Internet is falling apart! Go @dfox !

Fuck you aws.
I forgot to stop extra ec2 and you changed 500 bucks.
Although it is my fault, still aws didn't notify me even after i had set up budget.
Fucking jeff bezos

If any of you have been following my last few rants, you'll know I've been working on a project with a particularly difficult client, trying to meet wholly unrealistic deadlines with only one other developer.

The situation has reached the climax. The client had a call with our project manager and boss on Monday to discuss things. Despite them still not having paid a single bill since October, they've demanded the release date be moved to the 6th April. Apparently we'd agreed to release on this date, despite making no such promises, the (optimistic) deadline we were working towards has always been, since it was set about 2 weeks ago, the 16th April.

Apparently AWS migration won't take as long as we think it will, because the designers that do the CSS for this project say so, despite knowing nothing about the architecture of the requirements of the system once live (like if backups are required and what of).

The bottom line is that client is ending development with us the day after the project goes live to give it to their own in-house team. If they want us to work more after the date, they have to buy blocks of days.

To make things better, a large part of new functionality relies on an external API we can't even begin to do learning tests with, let alone integrate due to back-office errors on their end. They've had since Friday to give us our token, yet here we are.

Something tells me my holidays booked for for the first week of April are going by the wayside.

Debugs SSL setup on server for hours... Realises incoming on 443 was not enabled!! FML

Dockerize all the things! 🐳🐋

Want to see details about how much money you spent at AWS? That'll cost you some money.

Not sure if many people heard about nltk in python but I'm currently using a lot now for research.

So one day I was doing multiprocessing while using lemmatizer in nltk, for those who don't know, lemmatizer is a thing that change the word to its base form. So it is like, ran to run, bitches to bitch.

Anyway, the nltk package, to ensure it does not take too much memory, here's what it does: it loads a data file, and once it is loaded and accessed for the first time, it breaks the data file into CSV file. And since I was doing multiprocessing, the data file is accessed for multiple time while it can only be loaded once, hence error happened.

Instead of changing my code, which I think is good already, I went to the package directory of nltk and directly changed the source code from there and now the code works perfectly.

I'm very proud of my self at the moment, this is a very good lesson that I've learned: always look for alternatives. And suck it, nltk.

Anyone else will be at AWS Dev Day?

Clearly

Guys has this happened with anyone ..my older aws ec2 instance just vanished from my console but I can still ssh into it, how do I manage it for security groups and other things..?

Wanna grow in to more of a devops role, currently learning aws.. I'm excited, but also a bit nervous :)

Me, or everybody else.
I have bipolar disorder, it’s not entirely a bad thing because sometimes my mind flies and bizarre ideas just flush into my mind, ideas that eventually prove to be useful. However, not everyone can catch up my thinking speed.
This year for my senior capstone project, I teamed up with other three brilliant students. In the middle of the project I proposed a very aggressive method when our initial model failed, but they couldn’t understand my method. Towards the end of the semester I basically finished the project alone and claimed that they were just repeating what I was doing, and they didn’t realize that until the last week. At the end, the guy who’s always in charge of the other two people said that I was right, that the very aggressive method could have worked if given them more time to think about it.
I am both relieved and sorry at that moment. I cannot explain my ideas and that leads to my teams confusion.
I am still the same guy now, haven’t changed, will still be a pain in the ass when work with other people, I tried to be patient, but idk if it was just me being too impatient or others are too dumb.
I really tried......

Architect tells the PM that we're unable to make the move to AWS, because:

"We'll get DDoS:ed and they lack sufficient disk space".

The company moves less than a terabyte monthly.. <face palm>

The number of services you need to grok for full AWS certification...

What’s your opinions on AWS, Azure, and whatever googles version is called. I’m curious and I’m asking because I don’t really know a lot of details. I just know they host stuff and make some stuff easier.

Why do the AWS docs have to suck so much :/

I used to watch Netflix and Crunchyroll, but now I’m configuring aws for fun. Do I go crazy?🤦‍♂️

What certifications do you guys have, and which do you recommend having?

I'm currently pursuing AWS Developer Assosiate, and in the future Google certified Android developer and MongoDB developer.

Been thinking about Docker but it costs too much

Just created an account to say screw you AWS Cognito and your credentials voodoo !

So I'm TAing this database class and we constantly need to use shell to edit text. I am hosting the workshop with another student, who is a vim user and I am an emacs user. During one workshop he wrote down the commands for editing and quitting vim, and I simply told them control x and controls s, then control x and control c. And the stdents are fucking complaining that is too many commands? Like, wtf? And this week when we are holding the workshop and we need to edit something so he said just open your favourite editor and a girl was like vim, vim, vim , the same girl who complained emacs is too many commands. Like I'm the total loser using emacs there. Get your shit together people omfg you brainless followers. No offense to vim users, this is just personal.

Just got to know how awesome Docker is! LearnUps are turning out to be awesome!

So it turns out that a lot of writes to S3 is slow, regardless of whether you spent the time to rewrite your code from SAX to JAXB, then Go, then finally C++, thinking the problem was always with your code.

Don't you just love it when you spend 2 days carefully configuring a stack on AWS CloudFormation and then deploy it, hoping everything goes fine, just to realize you didn't change the region ON THE MOTHERFUCKING TOP BANNER!!!!!... and now you have to delete everything and redeploy it... no? well I love this...I truly do...I'm not mad, not at all...

Do I think this is a retarded interface, you say? YES I do...
Am I mad? PHffff...not AT ALL!!!

What's that? Why is my eye twitching? Because of happiness...I'm so full of joy it's coming out of my eyes...in the form of twitching...and tears...

Wal-Mart just asked if everyone could stop using AWS, because Amazon is a competitor of theirs. Thoughts?

Fucking hell the AWS IAM documentation is confusing as fuck. Trying to set up a fucking role is harder than cutting a rock with a fucking spoon.

And who the fuck thought it would be a good idea to allow a CLI user to run any command he's allowed to without any form of authentication??
Oh, set up MFA for the CLI you say? Good fucking luck with that, if you ever manage to figure out how to set that shit up!
Fuck this shit!

Debugging AWS IAM credentials wondering why they don't work for 5 hours.

Note to self: Check the clock first next time.

Wanna see a cool pic of me and my dog?

Can't believe how seriously fucked up AWS's documentation is. Did they just forget about it midway while making a service ? If it weren't for StackOverflow, I'd be pulling my hair.

So I was in my linguistic workshop today where we were going over control and raising concepts.

Without second thought, I put down 'ctrl' for control. And the guy, who's also a coder, didn't find anything wrong when looking at my sheet.

I think my vocabulary is screwed up

"When you're mad at him but he uses aws comprehend to judge your sentiments"

Damit azure, few days ago I have to launch a server but azure didn't let me set up a credit card because I was on free tier period, but also tell that I'm not eligible for free tier, so, WTF??

I'd came back to AWS and some minutes later I get my fcking ec2 instance running without any problem.

Fcking Microsoft.

Fifth server been created on amazon so i can finally deploy my laravel web app. Has been 3 days so far...
Fuck me

Starting this.... AWS Certified Developer

Which cloud hosting provider do you use or prefer and why?

I've been using Digital Ocean for two years, but I'm thinking about switching to AWS or Google, because two friends of mine recommended them. For me, at least AWS, feels way more complicated than DO. But if they are clearly better, I will switch. What's your recommendation, if you have any?

Thanks a lot!

Google web hosting vs AWS?

Has anyone noticed that safari seems to be smoother and faster than chrome now.

Working with AWS today, feels like my heads in the clouds

When the marketing/ideas cofounder discovers AWS RDS and decides to do the research on his own…

Amazon s3
It's so simple to use ...

IBM Cloud seems to be the only cloud computing platform that has a responsive website.

Admittedly I have only used GCP and AWS, I haven't touched Azure yet. Both GCP and AWS have incredibly slow web portals that take ages to load after every single click.

IBM Cloud is the only cloud service platform when I clicked a button and it loaded the next page like a normal website. It honestly felt surreal to navigate through all of their services. I have no clue why AWS and GCP are both so bad, it reflects really poorly on their services. If they can't get their own web portals to run quickly, why should I expect their services to be fast and reliable?

So my linux system didn't have any audio output now while it worked days ago and I haven't installed any new package. I was working on this for at least two hours. Reinstall drive things like that and none worked. I thought to myself: do you really want a system without sound? I mean it's good for coding since you can focus knowing you cant watch video now since theres no sound. But do you really want it? No, I would rather reinstall it. So I closed my laptop, didnt shut it down, and searched for how to reinstall ubuntu in command line and reopened my laptop, and magically, the sound is back online...... I guess linux is more powerful than I have ever imagined.

Sometimes I feel like the AWS consoles UI is overly complicated on purpose to discourage using it over the API.

So I just finished a group project for a database class, it's an open project and we made a website that is basically like rate your professor. We spent tons of time on it and the website is finally settled. But that's not the point, I won't put the URL here, I just wanna say:

I fucking hate php. Fuck it.

Just fuck it

Fun story

tl;dr; analog FTW!

so we've just had a nice game. A few teams internationally gathered together in the aws gameDay. We had aws accounts set up [one per team] and our goal was to maintain our t2.Micros to deal with incoming load. The higher the latency - the less points we get, the more 5xx - the more points we lose. The more infra we have, the more points we pay for it.

So we are quite new in aws, most of us know aws only in theory. And that's the best part!

So at first we had some steady, mild load incoming. But then bursts came up and we went offline. It's obvious we needed an lb w/ autoscaling. Lb was allright, we did set it up and got back online. We also created an autoscaling group and set it up.

Now what we couldn't figure out is how the f* do we make that group scale automatically, as a response to traffic! So we did what every sane person would do - we monitored LB's stats and changed autoscaling group's config manually 😁

needless to say we won the game w/ 23k points. 2nd place had 9k.

That was fun!

Oh my God i Love AWS. It's just so easy to scale shit

AWS YOU CAN DO DIE IN A HOLE FFS!
BECAUSE YOUR DOCUMENATION IS FUCKING SHIT FAR OUT!

Nice algorithm devrant

I was playing with AWS and came across Rekognition! Although the docs are poor, the service is just amazing. Mind blown.

That mini heart-attack when you navigate to your AWS entities and it listed nothing.. only to realize you're in the wrong region.

Every fukken time

I really don't like this trend of building command line applications for controlling some <buzzword> cloud app or <buzzword> framework.

Why should I need or want to learn the exact wording of your gcloud command, or the path to your Ng cli, or some ass-backwards AWS search syntax when I can get the same functionality from your web app, where I can use my FUCKING EYES to work out where the "Create Instance" button is and how to click it!!!??

Stop pushing your shitty python monolith of a client where possibilities for the above task range from:
- google-cloud instances --add "subfjfechye thiq"
To
- gcloud /create /type=INSTANCE "rogdhyuffhue"

"BuT iT mAkEs iT MoRe aUtomaTaBLe"
I DON'T CARE. What is the point when I can use a proper programming language instead of bash, with actual code-completion and syntax rather than the horrendous excuse for a suggestion system that is the Tab key where it probably doesn't even work in the first place and I have to copy and paste some mysterious dbus command buried in an old documentation page on the Wayback Machine using a utility I don't have installed and a broken URL?

Go away.

I feel like AWS makes a good chunk of its revenue from the complete fucking chaos and confusion of dealing with regions.

Fuck.

Why is AWS so opaque? Every time I run into a new awkwardly name service I have to parse some redundant management speak to figure out what it does. Does it really matter to anyone that their services have special names with words like "Simple"?

Spent 2 days optimizing SQL queries, and then I learned a valuable lesson.

If your database size is bigger than the RAM of the machine it’s running on, every query will take 5+ seconds ☹️

If we could get a full-time dev ops person for our org, I'd be so happy...

So I have question about my resume.
During my college time, I have done two projects related to politics:
One is to analyze the bias of media. What I did is scrape news covers for Trump and Hillary during election year and get sentiment analysis. The result is not surprising that among NY Times, NBC, Fox, Eashington Post, and CNN, Fox news is clearly favoring Trump, since Fox news is a republican news site.
The other project I did was to analyze the speech complexity and sentiment of the election. One of the observation we made was that Hillary and Trump are almost at the same level regarding speech complexity. However, Trump has a more positive sentiment in the speech, which is true consider how much he loves to say make America great again.

Now the question is, when I gave my advisor my resume, she said that I'd better not put those two projects on my resume since they are related to politics.

But, I am applying for a data science master degree. Seriously, I was just collecting the data and the data speaks for himself, why should I take those projects off my resume? I'm very proud of those projects I did as a matter of fact.

So here is the question. Shall I take off those two projects on my resume because they were political or I should leave it thereawarreally need some professional views. Please.