const reality = getRealWorld(dream);

Everyone here ranting about a fucking missing semicolon. I can't remember the last time a missing semicolon was the issue...

You wanna know what's REALLY BALL-BUSTING????

WHEN THE FUCKING 10 y/o LEGACY CODEBASE, CODED BY FUCKING PHP WORDPRESS SCRIPTERS WHO THOUGHT THEY COULD BUILD AN ENTERPRISE SHIT CAUSE ZF2 "LOOKS EASY" AND THEN FILL IT UP WITH SPAGHETTI, IS SO BAD WRITTEN THAT IN ORDER FOR THE PAGE TO RENDER YOU ACTUALLY ****HAVE**** TO DISABLE ERROR REPORTING SO WHENEVER A FUCKING ERROR HAPPENS ON THE TEMPLATE RENDER COMPONENT OF ZEND FRAMESHIT 2, YOU'RE LEFT WITH A FUCKING BLANK PAGE AND NOTHING IS LOGGED TO THE LOG FILE, SO YOUR ONLY OPTION IS DIE() DEBUGGING LINE BY LINE ON THE 1300 LINES PHTML FUCKFEST OF A VIEW THEY HAVE.

MISSING SEMICOLON? YES PLEASE, GIVE ME MORE OF THAT SHIT

I am receiving this type of one liner mail more often from our clients.

"Application is not working properly."
Me:
Typed : explain properly idiot.
Deleted.
Typed Again: Sir, can you be more specific.
Sent.

Or

"Application is not running."
Me:
Typed : of course it can't run. Bloody hell.
Deleted.
Typed again: inconvenience caused deeply regretted. Our representative will contact you about this.
Sent.

Man i am tired.

Seriously, wtf is with the new "make-everything-in-javascript" thing?

JavaScript is a terrible language. The type safety, or rather lack of it, gives me nightmares about debugging. The standards are always different. It's way too flexible. Ugh.

I'm tired of all the awesome services that I'd love to use being centralized over Node and JS. I don't want to use your stupid fucking language. Who does?

Also what happened to that dart thing that was supposed to replace JS?

Nothing is more permanent than temporary fix.
Marps.. 😂😂

I made this today... Click blank spot to see picture

rant == true

<rant>I want my stickers, but I'd rather rant about using email than actually use email. Cut me some slack, I'm a dev and I hate email. Email is horrible, it's barely changed since the 90's. I hate Slack and Skype as well, Discord is so much easier for my needs. I even set up some bots to tell me build statuses in their own channel.</rant>

Seebotschat is a "living" proof that AI probably wont take over anytime soon 😂

!Rant

Just had a very productive night with @hahaha1234 and @jappe. Revisited a lot of code, made it simpler, faster, storage efficient and future proof. Our smart search engine is getting somewhere now. Tomorow we will be continue building ofcourse, but first: time to sleep! It is 3:45AM and after that, go running on the beach in Zandvoort.

Darn it! That rare moment when you realize nobody else has tried what you're doing, but you are still confident enough only to discover that StackOverflow has no answers after all. And now I ended up solving my own problems.

Not a rant but I'm too excited not to post it. I proposed, she said yes!

Thanks @OnionIoT for awesome stickers :)

Code review day 1:

Me: Where are these three templates being used? I don't see any class that uses them.

Him: Oh, yeah. My bad. I'll remove them.

(Time passes)

Him: I don't know what's going on with my branch. Please ignore the PR for now.

(Time passes)

Him: Is there any way for me to get the files from staging. I don't know what I did to my branch.

Me: Hang on. I'll push a copy of the one I have in a new branch.

He declines his PR and stops by to say he's going home but he'll open a new PR tomorrow and remove the unused files.

Code review day 2:

Him: Hey, do you know what happened to my PR? It looks like it disappeared.

Me: You declined it yesterday. Said you'd make a new one today without those extra files.

Him: Ooooh!

My colleague came up with a great idea for a pocket reference guide

Sometime I fear that I will be totaly useless if the era of internet will gone.. Era of computer will fade..

I cant even cook tea..

User: "it stopped working"
Me: "ok. Could you be more specific?"
User: "it just closed"
Me: "could you give me the stacktrace/error message?"
User: "no."
Me: "why?"
User: "can't find it"

With a long conversation and some frustrating debugging it turned out that, ironically enough, the crash reporter crashed...

What my lecturer think I have learned:
- Programming Patterns
- C, C++, Java
- Socket programming, web programming
- Operating system...

What I have actually learned:
1. printf("Hello World");
2. echo "Hello World";
3. console.log("Hello World");
4. Console.Writeline("Hello World");
5. cout << "Hello World" >> endl;
6. System.out.println("Hello World");
7. puts "Hello World";
8. "Hello World"
9. write("Hello World");
10. Display "Hello World"

!rant

Am I the only dev who doesn't drink coffee?

Not drinking coffee makes me a bad coder? 🤔

SharePoint have something called 'event receiver'. An event is triggered when the user inserts a new record in a list. That event must update a column in the same item. After a few minutes it starts to throw conflict errors while trying to update said column. Doesn't happen with every user. Also I wasn't able to reproduce this behavior in the dev environment.

So now I just recursively call the update method, passing an iterator parameter, repeating the same method until it successfully update the record. Or after 6 failures email someone to see what's going on. Just did it today and published at 7PM. Tomorrow gonna be a long day and I know I deserve it.

When you break a geeks heart

At the office.

History

Is it possible at all to be a really good developer and maintain good interpersonal relationships?

A Geologist and an engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Geologist leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Geologist persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5." Again, the Engineer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Geologist now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!"

This catches the Engineer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Geologist asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?"

The Engineer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Geologist.

Now, it's the Engineer's turn. He asks the Geologist, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The Geologist looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail.

After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50. The Engineer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep.

The Geologist is more than a little miffed, shakes the Engineer and asks, "Well, so what's the answer?"

Without a word, the Engineer reaches into his wallet, hands the Geologist $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.

A fun experience with a client:
Client: We want to use a database in the cloud without internet.
Us: Uhm that's not possible.
Client: Why not? You don't need internet to use a cloud database, because it's in the sky right?
.....
We will never forget our first client.
p.s. he also wanted to use his wifi printer without internet and cable

I pray for a future where clients have a better understanding of IT related concepts🙏

Craziest and most mind blowing CS project, I've seen so far. What's yours?

https://github.com/mame/quine-relay

So my company wants to hire a Data Scientist with 5 years experiece in this job ...

A developer tried to design a house once

Am I the only one who laughts at this jokes

And thats the reason nobody like us