At a funeral.....

A visitor: What's the WiFi password here?

Priest: Respect the dead

Visitor: All small letters ?...

The guy who did android dev before me in the company i work for, didn't get paid for 2 months, so he moved all the project files he worked on to an empty partition and locked the drive with Windows' BitLocker. He didn't give the password until he was fully paid. I kinda respect that guy.

Respect ++

Respect

Show some respect... 🙌

I have alot of respect for the programmers that came before stack overflow lol not even joking.

MacBook is running even with 0% battery #respect

My last employer lost 6 devs and 2 designers within a month because they thought money could buy them the right to treat employees like shit.

F_ money. We love our self respect more.

This is Why I give IT support so much respect.

Friend: my computer stopped working can you help?
Me: (porn...again) fine I'll help.
Friend: come over when your ready
Me: Be there tomorrow bro

Next day.....

Me: where is your desktop
Friend: upstairs, I tried everything man
Me: look at the monitor... look at the hp piece of shit.. see green light on... look back at the monitor...no light... look at my friend.
Friend: 😕
Me:😪
Friend:😳
Me: look behind the desk...
Friend: 😰
Me: 😪your monitor is unplugged
Friend: 😅
Me: fuck you lose my number

Free advice take it or leave it
A few days ago I completed my one year work anniversary(is that how it's said) at my first job. And this rant is basically stuff I learnt and stuff I wish someone had told me when I was starting out. Here goes:-

When you are starting out your first job you would be a fresh out of college and people around you in college are your friends where as people around you at work are colleagues. Your friends can like you, but you have to earn the respect of colleagues.

If you sit yo ass too long u will become fat(started going to the gym again).

Don't bother your seniors too much. they have their own shit to deal with.

Don't bring your personal shit to office I don't want to hear how cute your dog looked while it took a dump on your carpet.

Avoid the person who gossips.
It's a two way street.

Whatever you find amazing your boss may not you know coz you are a geek and your boss isn't.

Don't talk to people when they are coding.Yeah just don't.

Avoid "below the belt" humor you may look funny but you loose respect in the long run.

Keep upgrading yourself don't stop learning.

Admit stuff you don't know don't Bullshit.

To sum it up it's a game of respect, respect of knowledge,respect of skill and most of all respect of attitude.

Respect..

Developers respect other developers xD

While I was looking for a wallpaper to use on my laptop, I bumped on this one and nostalgia kicked in!
It only took an instant to save it and set it!!! 😂
Whoever did this, s/he gets my respect!

Fuck frontend. Writing a new service thingy and while the backend was done in about one fucking hour, I've been working on the frontend for hours now because frontend fucking hates me and that feeling is fucking mutual.

Grrrrrrr. (and respect for the ones who can properly develop nice looking interfaces)

Respect mate.
Credits its foss

My girlfriend keeps getting review requests from restaurants we visited.

Then there's a list of all the visited ones on her phone.

Location services is off.

Fucking annoying.

Google sucks.

Absolutely no respect for privacy.

None whatsoever.

Privacy is a myth.

😡😡😡😡😡😡😡

This is how I want my gravestone to be!!

In my previous company, I used to work for a client company which had a terrible website. It was about financial data and people would have to wait too long before the page loaded because there was a freaking 1.2 megs of minified, compressed JS file that needed to load before you could do anything.

Everyone knew that was a pain in the ass and nobody wanted to touch spaghetti code and mess up something they didn't know.

I wanted to however take a shot at it. So an architect from client side and I discussed how we were gonna go about it and how we were gonna find the stuff that needed to load on page load and stuff that could be loaded later.

So we plan for it. We broke everything down from a globals polluting JS, found out the variables and functions that needed to run during first load by literally putting a console statement for each function and finally came up with two bundles.

The primary bundle was 120kb and would during first load and then every module would call it's own secondary bundle when the user interacted with it.

In the process, we removed half a meg of JS and the site became blazing fast.

I did it with a team of two members who, my manager thought were useless, learned a ton of stuff, setup proper process for the transition.

When the client didn't appreciate the amount of brain and effort we had put into it, these two members came forward to tell the client to acknowledge my effort and attributed the success of it to me.

I was totally moved. There was so much respect that I didnt care what anybody else thought. I was just so happy to work with those two humans.

When i left the company, i gifted them stuff they always talked about or wanted. :) Feels good.

Press F to pay respect

TGFLE - Thank God for Let's Encrypt

I respect what they're doing, and the certbot they offer.

How to win at programming and life at the same time

why are we having a flame war on best programming language! it is personal choice and everything has its own purpose and importance. as a dev we should respect that

🤣🤣🤣
Somehow, my boss got his son, 19, working in a team of developers last week.
Son: i got ton of money and i dont need to do this. i inherit lot of properties from my dad.(trying to sound funny, superior, and boasting of his inheritance knowledge he might have learned in school during java class probably.)

A guy in the team: No you dont. You are like us.😎😎😎
Son: minds his own business now.

Damn that line made my day.
🤗👏👏👏👏

++ for this dude for insulting morons like this at work.
I may have to remove it on boss request if he see it. But for now hit as many ++ to show that idiot no body likes people like him.

Respect for both.

So I'm learning 2D game dev in java.
(I know)

Being stubborn I'm coding everything myself because, you know who needs libraries.😅

And

Holy toenails ,I have mad respect for the guys who build game engines. Especially 3d engines.

Y'all are beasts.

seniorDev has added the feature, which has got deployed. I thought added feature is not appropriate and i forced him to remove the feature. After few days, clients demanded same feature
Moral: respect SeniorDev.

A moment of respect to people who willingly spend time to help out other people on sites such as StackOverflow

I have a lot of respect for anyone who can design a good looking website.

I can code like crazy. And I was a freelance classically trained illustrator for 10 years. But ask me to design a website and it's all spinning giffs, midi tracks, and Comic Sans. Some kind of early 90's geocities nightmare.

"could you put me through to a colleague who has the ability to have an actual intellectual conversation?"

-

Somehow I finished the call but God damn it took some energy and self control not to completely lose my shit. His tone was also very denigrating (he just didn't agree on something which was his fucking problem)

Fuck him.

To all the design pattern nazis..

Don't you ever tell me that something is impossible because it violates some design pattern! Those design principles are there to make your life easier, not something you have to obey by law.
Don't get me wrong, you should where ever possible respect those best practices, because it keeps your software maintainable.
But your software should foremost solve real world problems and real world problems can be far more complex than any design pattern could address. So there are cases where you can consciously decide to disregard a best practice in order to provide value to the world.

Thanks for reading if you got this far.

Respect ...

Does anyone respect the 80 columns rule when coding?

9pm Project Manager: We have to push an update TONIGHT
9.45pm Devs: okay guys, all latest bugs are fixed, just needs final check and we can push the update
10:45pm Devs: Guys?...
11:45pm Guy in charge of testing: Uh doesn't work...
- What doesn't work?
- I dunno, I get an error message
- What's the (fucking) error message?!
Aaaaand silence
Fuck this I'm going to bed.

Late night programming with pops.

This man has taught me most of what I know and I have a terrific amount of respect and debt for him, and his work.

Here's to a lot more years cranking that genius brain of his! 🥂

Git: A version control system expressly designed to make you feel less intelligent than you are thought you were.

The only people I consider enemies are people who aren't honest with me and are playing games. Be upfront with me. Did I do something you liked? Did I fuck up? Fuckin' tell me. Then I'll treat you with respect. If not, fuck off and get out of my life.

Don't care if you're the best fucking dev in the world.
If you don't respect time, I don't respect you.

As a frontend dev, i love watching our backend devs sometimes go like "hey come on it's just css I can do it real quick, let me do it this time" and get super frustrated with failure. Buddy, one of the reasons frontend is not so easy is that it can be real fucking annoying. I'm keeping my distance and respect for your side so stay the fuck away from my dance floor.

These 2 found stack overflow ↓ #respect

So I'm on stack overflow trying to give back to the community that has helped me so much yanno.

So I see a question and decide to answer it but I'm on my mobile and trying to write a well formatted etc. answer is a bit tricky so instead I thought I would answer it as best I could on the phone so at least the OP would be going in the right direction and then when I got back to my computer, I would expand on the answer.

But before I had a chance (within 10 minutes of answering) some 200k+ rep dickhead decided it was his job to tell me how bad I was for not giving a proper answer and i have enough rep to comment and I should know better.

So I responded to him (my first mistake) and told him that my answer was intended to get him going and most likely he wouldn't need any more help but that I was going to update it when I got back to my computer.

Well he didn't like that and continued to berate me for my unbelievable behavior.

I then said that if he was that upset, then report me, or even better how about he actually answer the question instead of being a fuckwit to others that have tried.

I also said that I thought that SO and development in general was not about being given the answer but by finding it yourself and actually learning something and that sometimes you need to be pushed it the right direction to find the answer which is what I did here.

Well he disagreed with that too and downvoted my answer which by that point had been updated (like I said I would).

I just don't get it, what is wrong with these people and why has SO become such a toxic place?

I want to give back to the community and help others like people have done for me over the years, but then fuckheads like this just ruin it and make you not want to be a part of it anymore.

Then I come here to devRant and everyone is so nice to each other, you can see the respect.

I was asked by our tester and scrum master to ignore some failing unit tests yesterday. The tester literally said "no time for tests, we need the build now". The scrum master is also a tester and agreed. I dont think I can respect either of them as testers anymore.

Had a PM in my programming class say "I want to understand what my team is going through, so I want to learn to code and the like, really to be a jack of all trades to better myself and my team" 👏 I respect that.

When they pay with gratitude and respect for the project instead of money.

A moment of silence for the people working on weekends #respect.

How tf does these even make sense?! That's a fucking sledgehammer and large metal chisel on fucking steroids. If your parents don't know what the fuck those are and realize they have nothing to do with fixing a relatively flimsy box (in comparison) they probably need more than their WiFi fixed, but since they managed to fucking raise you, I doubt they're that dumb. I get that parents might not always understand technology, but shit, at least respect the fact that they survived without the Internet, which you probably couldn't do...

Went to a hackathon once where the main rule was - "No abuse of one another with respect to operating systems"

9 days.
9 fucking days without internet.
9 fucked up days with access to a national intranet with the only accessible things being websites with privacy-respect policy of facebook, with all your unencrypted data streaming under dictator hands.

All respect to android (love the system (no, that doesn't mean that I love google)) and also to awesome custom roms (hell even some vendors make quite good ones imo!).

BUT WHO THE FUCKING HELL THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO LIMIT THE AMOUNT OF ALARMS YOU CAN HAVE TO 15 OR EVEN LIMIT IT AT ALL?!?
I HAVE TO GET UP AT 3:30 FOR WORK EACH NIGHT AND THIS IS *NOT* HELPING.

THE PERSON WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA CAN TAKE A PHONE, OPEN THAT DEFAULT CLOCK APP AND SHOVE IT UP HIS FUCKING ASS.

So python, who knew it could automate a lot of crappy tasks 😎
Actually I did, but god it’s so quick and easy to implement than expected.

I have a new formed respect for python devs after my day of web crawling and ftp transfers and outlook mining 😘

I finished two projects. Both of them need to connect to each other. However, the tool to do that is not currently licensed to achieve my desired outcome. I email my boss to check the status of the license key I need, that they promised, and the only thing I get back is "Correct." Seriously? 😠 The person who has the company credit card and authority to buy, also the same one that gives me a deadline to turn this shit in, can't give me the time of day to respond to an email? Their response wasn't even relevant. I've been trying to move beyond this roadblock for a week now! I'm a pretty independent guy, but I'm not going to buy the license myself for a tool that I didn't even want to use. So when someone comes to my cube and I'm raging on Steam, ✋ I don't want to hear anything about company time, because mine isn't being respected either. 👊👊

Don't burn other devs just because you don't like their solution. Discuss empower and stop being a total prick. People should look up to you because they respect you not because you put them down!

I tend to respect project managers who came from production (ie. who can code, design, or produce something tangible), vs. "professional" managers who have no idea how the work is actually done.

Sadly I didn't encounter many.

Could all this fucking weak sick people just stay at home instead of coming to our damn open space office and be coughing their guts out ever 20 seconds for all the office to listen! damn, have some respect for the healthy people and go lie in your bed.

Lua comes with its own tutorial, written in Lua.

RESPECT.

Just wanted to stop by and say that you developers deserve much more respect for what you do. You have the ability to create something completely new and outstanding, and you put so much effort in order to do so.
You are the best and don't let anyone tell you otherwise :)

PS. Any fellow pentesters in here?

I never made a friend due to code.
Either I fucking hate people if I see their code or I respect them.
But getting a friend because of code seems to me rather unrealistic.

Maybe I could get a female code groupie, if I write code little bit more lovely and sexy.

Ask me again in a year.

Me: ssl conn cannot be esrablished. Cert is not signed

Sr. Dev/architect: what url are you calling?

Me: dns_name:port

sd/a: yeah, I know that. But what is the url?

Me: *how the f... Did you get 'sr' and 'arch' titles, man???*
Me: why does it matter?

Sd/a: certificates depend on a url. Our LB selects a cert according to a request url

me: *buddy, I like you but I no longer look at you with respect like I used to before today...*

Okay so here are a few lessons that I have learned from being an intern to a junior developer (who’s just 2 years out of college).
- every ninja engineer starts off as a noob. There’s nothing to be ashamed of if you don’t know “everything” about coding
- Respect everyone’s opinion (including the one that shouts your design is crap in a meeting). Don’t process them too much.
- leave things that happen at work, in the workplace
- Keep yourself up to date even after you’ve bagged the 100,000$ offer. Never.stop.learning.
- Be polite to your interns (been there). They look up to you and treat their juniors the way you treat them.
- Be honest. Including your tiny scrum updates. If you need more time, tell it. If you’ve screwed up something , own it up.
- Never blame or point fingers.
- Nothing is irreversible.(except things like sudo rm -rf/)
- There’s always a way out(of any mess).
- Respect what came before.
- Respect what comes after (before you push badly written code)
- It’s ok to point out mistakes but Be kind. (Else you’ll end up in someone else’s rant ;-) )

Alright everyone!

It is time for me to run an experiment with the people of devRant. There are just a few simple rules for this experiment.

They are:
1. Do not change the username
2. Do not change the password
2.5. Do not delete the account
3. Respect others
4. Don't get banned
5. I am watching

So.. Time for the experiment.

Username:
muchUsername

Email:
yemipiyiba@hubii-network.com

Password:
suchPassword

Have Fun!

I wonder. What makes people so offensive about their opinions?

"How the f can you use Windows?"
"I can't believe you use android..."
"What an idiot he uses tabs..."

I don't get it... respect subjectivity?

the biggest lie in human history : "we will keep your information on file in our database and it may be evaluated with respect to other positions that become available in the future."

Number one rule by the product team

Respect the beats

What Java taught me :
--- Parent p = new Child( ); -- error
--- Child c = new Parent( ); -- ok
parent can exist without a child but child cannot exist without parents.
Respect your Mom and Dad

I brought in my friend who's a Java developer (and I respect very much) for a job interview with my boss at the time. I sat in for the interview. My boss' first question to him was "Do you suck cock?"

He got the job.

I quit my job at a startup because the business guys did not respect my advices in business strategy.

just saw the job post for my position where they write:
"experience with MySQL databases (for example redis and git)"

Now I know that I was wrong. These guys seems to have informations that I do not have 😎

To the people talking about boats on the other side of the cubical wall, FUCK YOU! YOU HAVE BEEN TALKING FOR 45 MINUTES! DO YOU WORK? I HOPE YOUR BOATS ALL GET RUST. I worked 12 hours on Sunday, got 4 hours of sleep, pulling a full day, then depending on how much work I get done work all night again. RESPECT MY QUIET ZONE!!! Uncouth peasants!

{
Dear whoever made devrantron available on the AUR: BLESS YOU. MAY UNDERSTANDING CLIENTS AND JUNIORS WHO RESPECT AUTHORITY COME YOUR WAY.
};
( with kde's app-loading cursor animation, the devrant stressball bounces and i think that's absolutely fantastic )

John: You know, I don't appreciate it when I run the application and it crashes on me. Especially when you say it's working. If you say you've debugged it and got it working, I shouldn't be able to break it in the first 2 minutes.

--------------------------
me: You know John, with all due respect, there are two ways that this can go. Either we can actually work on this project as a team and get something done, or I can leave and have you flounder on your own trying to complete the rest of this project for the next 4 months. Now, I know that you don't have a lot of experience in this framework, so that means you owe me the respect I deserve and not complain about the way things are getting done.
--------------------------

Me: Ok, John, I'll fix it.

If you are sick...

STAY THE FUCK HOME!

It has nothing to do with how YOU are feeling. It’s about RESPECT for those around you.

Especially if you work in an open office. Coming into an open office when sick is like coughing right on someone’s face repeatedly, it shows that same level of (lack of) respect.

Almost every company I have seen fucks this up so bad. It’s the same shit every year....

People are afraid to take days and stay home. They go in and make everyone sick, then everyone is taking days off and we are “short” on people. Then the incompetent CEO is scratching his head as to why this toxic work environment could produce such a toxic result.

And one more fucking thing.

If you got a cold/flu on Monday and your in the office on Wednesday because you are “feeling a bit better” then your a fucking idiot. At day 3 you are just starting to expel germs while still being highly contagious.

If you come into an open office while sick then I would say...

“Smarten the fuck up! And start showing some respect for the people you work with!”

If you have created (or are creating) a culture that encourages this then I would say...

“Fuck you! You should be fucking smarter than that.”

————

If your still sitting there thinking something like...

“Well I have to attend the meeting” or some other shit. Then let me add this to the pile.

Not everyone has had a rosy fucking life.

You may be working next to someone who has a lowered immune system due to past medical problems. What may be a week of sickness for you could end up being a month in the hospital for them.

You may be working next to a person who has a family member dying of cancer. If you make them sick then they can’t visit that family member (colds can kill cancer patients) and you may be stopping that person from seeing their loved ones one last time before they die.

Don’t be a fucking asshole.

STAY THE FUCK HOME!

This female collegue whom I used to hangout during tea and lunch has suddenly started hanging out with another female collegue.

I'm alone, sad and overthinking is killing me. I asked her if there is something I said or did that made her hang out with someone else.

She said it's not a big deal and I should stop creating drama. I think I lost my self-respect while facing her about this.

There are two essential things to understand if you want to get along with me :
- Respect goes both ways. If you don't respect me I aint gonna respect you.
- Array starts at 0

My Dell Precision M4700 is going to complete 6 years of faultless service, still my main workstation.

It arrived with 3rd gen core i7, 8gb RAM and 750gb 7200rpm hard drive with Windows 7. It gradually transformed into 32gb RAM, 3tb of ssd and Ubuntu 18.04. This dude still runs for days without a problem.

Genuine respect!!

p.s.: If I have to change my next machine, it would be "Dell Precision 7730".

Note to others: if I start a sentence with “with all due respect....”

What that means is “you’re a fucking arsehole”

The best thing about having COBOL in my last internship is not that it opens you a lot of new job opportunities, is the look of fear and respect of your coworkers when you say that you learned it.

Respect!!🙏🙏🙏

I hate cliched lines in office.

When someone I respect leaves the company I don't say "Good luck for your future. Keep in touch". I shake hands, look them in the eye and say "It's been an honor"

On a birthday I don't say "Happy Birthday". I say "May you grace the cover of Time magazine" or something else related to their aspirations.

Respect.

Remember the time when someone appreciated your code and praised the implementation, said that your code was better??
Yeah, neither do I.

Please understand the three types of brackets are parenthesis,curly brackets and square brackets
Respect the parenthesis! They aren't "ROUND BRACKETS"

That awkward situation when an instructor looks over your shoulder while you code

Instructor: *breathes over my shoulder*
Me:*slows down coding and eventually stops*
Instructor: ...
Me: ...
Instructor: ...Is something the matter?
Me: *screams internally*

I respect the teacher but having him do that is not good for my heart :/

Not necessarily on here, but Devs tend to bitch about designers and their lack of basic dev skills/understanding (talking about webdev). But when devs try to design it usually ends with a horrendous piece of visual garbage. Respect each others profession and the outcomes will be better. That's why Apple is now one of the most envied companies on the planet.

FUCK, I just realized something..

A lot of people are probably aware of the statement "Respect is earned, not demanded/given".

Now, if you are aware of the meme "Press F to *pay respect*", you probably know where this goes.

The statements "pay respect" and "respect is earned" are actually connected. Just like money, you pay money to people who deserve it. You work hard for it.

But if this is true, is "attention" also earned? I often hear "Please pay attention" from my teachers back then.

This is some big brain shit right here

The new guy took homeopathic "medicine" today ... how can I respect him as a human being now?

Interested in the "If 42 is the answer? What is the question?" diversity. 🤔

*me going to wikipedia*
searching for 42
buncha math stuff whatever
matrix sum... interesting 🤨
(is 42 maybe related to dimensions?)
*sees a lot of programs relations where 42 is considered magical in themselves*

"The ASCII code 42 is for the asterisk symbol, being a wildcard for everything."

*literally speechless* 😮

I had a genuine respect for C++ developers back in 2001

Then this whole STL thing happened. Then C++11, C++14....C++17

Me now: Bitch do they even write code 🤣🤣

I was at a meetup yesterday where the topic was PHP7. I'm frontend though went there because of my backend friend. I have one question. How the fuck do you guys understand PHP? To me it looks like total black magic fuckery. Respect to all my backend fellas!

Got an email in response to an internship application asking "if you can just complete a coding challenge within next 24 hours thanks". They also wanted to me to setup a phone interview today or tomorrow. As if they expected everyone to drop everything with no explanation.

Told them I'm busy but can get started on Sunday, and was told they have assessment centres next week so it can't wait. No real apology.

I didn't set the date for the assessment centre, this is your fuckup. You have to at least feign respect when you ask for a day of my time with less than a week's notice. Been through too many bad interviews to waste my time on a company that doesn't have its shit together and/or doesn't respect interns.

Idk, maybe I overreacted. Thoughts?

Just to be clear:
I don't hate Zuckerberg,
I hate Facebook.
Always respect a guy who can put money together like it's a python list compression.

Respect 😆😝

Joined a flying school. Hopefully in a few years I can say goodbye to computers, bad pay, worse hours, and little respect

Look, I've given Microsoft and Windows a lot of shit, but I just have to be fair and say the one piece of hardware that I absolutely covet is the Surface Pro... If that is the direction Microsoft is heading in the coming years I'll have a lot more respect for them...

Respect...

I can’t respect an architect that does not code or never has. Keep making pretty pictures...

Enough!!

There is to much hate in the world already without hating on Windows because you are a Linux user, or vice Versa.

All I'm reading is windows is shit! Linux is for supreme devs.

More to life than hate! Respect each other's skills. Skills are like race all are unique and no one race is superior and don't discriminate because of skills.

Yay, my raspberry pi and it's projects are now on php7

Damn, Apache was the real pain in the ass with this migration, # ae2enmod php7.2 apparently is for it to decide if it will respect my sudo'n decisions😂

I run a Discord for a small community and I found a image I really liked as most new users seems to think it's OK not to read the rules or believe that respect must be a rule rather then a thing given by them by choice.

I was not having much respect for out front-end developer, as the UI is not so good., yea. I know it UI depends on the designer.

Now the new design changed and our UI looks awesome.,

and I must say that my respect increased a lot when my pm asked him to fix the layout in UC Browser.

Fucking shit., in UC it is showing two lanes as one lane. I don't know why., he was working hard to fix that.

Massive Respect to him. I really happy by being backend dev.

#Respect

I swear I hate seeing these wannabe programmers sharing their shit content on social media. I mean, I respect people who are getting into programming and giving it their best. But one just doesn't write "Fuck Types" when talking about a Dart. I mean, atleast open the introduction page of that language before you jump and start giving people "pro tips". Stop skimming over technologies/languages and dive a bit deep to understand how it works.

Im so fucking disgusted with the paternalistic superiority complex so many techbros have.

They see themselves as the new elite priestly class, protectors of the Sacred Tech, convinced everyone else is too stupid to handle themselves.

The answer to stupidity is not to keep people in the dark, enforcing only more stupidity. What a dismal worldview. Treat other humans with respect and dignity and they will surprise you.

I heard the best joke lately!

What do vegans, crossfitters and linux users have in common?

oh wait, wrong forum...

My CEO uncle: "anyone can program."

A quote from when we were discussing strategy for my sit down with the CEO of a company I was applying at (FYI, his advice was to research the company, be familiar with their long term strategies and such). I get that there's no need to prove my technical prowess to a business exec, but it isn't because "anyone can program."

I mean, sure, in a philosophical sense, anybody has the capacity to learn. But developers aren't a fungible asset. Treating them as such leads to ruin.

Dear boss, client :

We, the developers, have family. Respect our time by knowing what you want us to build beforehand.

Stack Overflow taught me to place all my respect for fellow users in a near arbitrary score.

As a new user here I feel trapped...

I Googled "png to svg converter", this is the output of the first online tool I tried.

This dev literally just a base64 encoded copy of my origin image wrapped in an svg... the most infuriating thing about it is that technically it did 'convert' it to svg - just not in the way I had anticipated.

Whoever wrote this is a lazy genius (and a dickhead).

Well, my client likes the sailboat picture that I put up on his site as the hero area.

Now he wants to know if I can animate the water and put the sounds of waves and seagulls in the background.

I can, but fuck you. I won't. I have respect for the people that visit your site.

Company: We want to attract lots of new talent.
Employee: First, try to retain your existing talent. Please treat them with respect and give them every now and then challenges they deserve.

Please ask the attrition rate of every company you interview with.

Doing coding from past 5 years.
Everyone treat me like regular working family member.
and then one day Dad stuck on some .gov site filling form.

He was not able to use backspace as developer forget to allow
backspace. So, I open console type the basic
document.getElementById().value = "";

Now, I am getting respect as a doctor get =_=

Stack overflow was down..
I don't know why, but it developed some kind of respect for senior developers who don't had access to stack overflow in their time.

We trust you have received the usual lecture from the local System
Administrator. It usually boils down to these three things:

#1) Respect the privacy of others.
#2) Think before you type.
#3) With great power comes great responsibility.

C programmers #respect !!

Found this on Facebook... Should I be the one to tell them that apple didn't invent emoji and that the flags are all of countries?

I'm Australian and respect our natives but... Really?

Respect to those who 'console.log();' over 'debugger;'

So, here I am at a guided internship programme, hosted by Indian Railways.

They told us to report at the Personnel Office by 10:00 AM. When I reached there, they told us the venue has been changed (to a place 1km away, with no transportation) and the official "forgot" to inform the 500+ candidates.

Yet, we moved to the said Hall, and am waiting for 1 hour (10:59 AM here), watching :
1. The stupid technician trying to align the projector
2. The stupid presenter trying to copy something and failing, as his pen drive gets disconnected halfway the process.
3. The VIPs having snacks and coffee on-stage while we the students wait here looking at those dumb assholes.

How am I supposed to respect them tomorrow at work?

How to get me to never respond to your email: make the subject line say "Salesforce ninjaneer wanted!!!"

First of all I don't do salesforce and second ninjaneer is not a word. I hate when people say code ninja or code warrior or any of those other crap phrases. I'm a software developer. Respect that or suck it.

Pretty much right now. I'm seething, just thinking about going to work in a few short hours.

I work for a company that doesn't respect me. A fucking simpleton designer who can do no wrong has changed everything about a project that I'm responsible for, hundreds of times. She gets out a ruler (yes, really), measures stuff against her little mockups (that are also prone to changing without notice), and screams when things don't precisely match her "designs" on every single device she can get her goddamned hands on. She's changed everything except the deadline. I have gotten none of the recognition and all of the blame, and I'm completely over it. This is nothing new. In addition to being a dev team of one, I also found out that I'm the third such person in my company's employ in the last two years, and I've worked here for one.

The final straw was when I was given a schedule for the next project, which I had not been consulted on. It was a printout of an email. Copied in the email was the designer, my boss, and an intern. A FUCKING GOD DAMNED HOURLY INTERN.

Fast forward one week.

I'm in third stage interviews with half a dozen companies right now, second stage interviews with at least that many. When I do get another job, I was originally going to give notice, but I think now I'll just give my boss a printout of an email to the interns and walk out.

Shove the internet up your ass, you fucking fucks

I see a lot of jokes and memes about PHP. However, from the community conferences, I see that the community has matured so much compared to other communities. I truly respect and admire its community (at least the mature part of it).

Not being appreciated but I bet that applies to nearly everyone.

If I build you really cool shit you've not seen before. And no one else you know or can get in contact with are capable of it. You're damn right I expect respect and compensation equal to my skill and time.

Dear Thread please show some respect!

Sticker game:

A friend finds me coding and busy on my code then asks.

Her:Can I have a minute.
Me:Sure,how can I be of help

Her:What's up with all this devrant cartoons on your machine.
Me:Sounding excited,you like my sticker game can ship some for you?

Her:Nah sticker game since when is there such one looks childish and why ship stickers.
Me:It's our techy culture respect it let me finalize on my work.

She messed up my evening human bug.

Finally enough ++ to add a yellow rubber duck to my profile image!
Next goal a new desk.

arrived all the way to Philippines, the stickers have. yes mhmmm. salamat po @dfox @trogus (thank you).

//po is used to show respect to older people or someone respectable here in ph

I broke my keyboard while coding.
My mom was like.. u don't treat things with respect.
And I was like.. " my life's shit!! "

How to lose my respect :p

Junior devs who are unable to use Google and don't respect your headphones, brutally pulling you out of the zone. There's a special place in hell for these guys.

!rant
Walked into the networking area to visit my network guys and sys admins.

They just got a whoooole bunch of equipment.

Shit looks intimidating af man. Mad respect for you sys admins and networking people. Seems like a really cool job, difficult and challenging at the same time!

After years of my own dodgy javascript codes, I've started to throw away everything I know about javascript and learn it from scratch.

Learning that functions are objects really helped in restructuring a pile of my code. Eg passing it as a parameter to be executed.

Suddenly callback functions make a lot of sense now, and I've got a new found respect for the language.

I’m not an Apple fan boy but I do use their products and respect their business ethos.

I was please when I saw this as part of my software update today.

Before the haters start hating, if you use a google device or use Facebook then you already don’t have a leg to stand on.

Does anyone else lose respect for IT or programming companies that use OTHER companies to make their websites?

You mean to tell me, you want me to hire you to make a website, when you can't even make your own? Not happening.

I said I know how to quit from Vi in the job interview but they didn't accept anyway. People have no respect for true knowledge in these days.

Ignore the official start/finish times. Instead, sync your office ours to that of someone in your team you respect.

I have tried Facebook, plus, Twitter whatsapp and various other "social" platforms and they always end up being repetitive and boring. Unfortunately and with all due respect devrant has followed that trend and is becoming just as boring.
Nothing beats human interaction - it's just so much more enjoyable.

I'm not a web dev but I am pretty sure it is not so easy!
TNW just lost it's respect from me for this click bait!

I honestly owe everything to my buddy in our startup. He has taught me how to think in Javascript and that is why I am where I am. We fight almost everyday on almost everything, but there is Noone I respect more than I respect him..

!rant
I am a developer at a tech company. The tester in my team refuse to test my work because he feel I don't respect him. He is a fucking idiot, so obviously I don't respect him. I can still do my job just like always, so I told the cretin it doesn't matter if I respect him or not and he doesn't need my respect to do his job.

At the end of the day I couldn't care less about his feelings. I just hope my boss doesn't fire me when he finds out.

back in my university years, we had a teacher that taught all his courses in the lab. he used to go in, explain something for 15 minutes then the rest is practicing on the computers.

the best part was: he never gave us final exams. it was our choice with a final project and an exam. we surely picked the final project.

this is how programming classes should be taught. he took this approach because he was himself a programmer and knew how much practicing was important . Respect for these teachers.

Wtf java.. You can't just fucking make java paid.. This is not acceptable assholes. Although I don't use java now for many good reasons. But I always had respect for it. And I used to use it.

Http/2 server push is really cool. Like, really fucking cool. Those researchers at google really got this right. I hate how they handle their users but I have to say they really make good use of the money they get by selling us for kettle.

That job you thought you may not be a good fit, you end up at.

Sometimes as developers we doubt ourselves because we set higher bars for ourselves to learn more and try and build better solutions and share them with everyone.

You are almost as good as you need to be and you are going to be getting better, as long as you keep hitting the road towards your main goal.

But look at it this, isn't it the best of scientific communities?

Everyone is trying to improve and share more and make the ecosystem richer.

And open-source, fucking open-source, if there is a God, then he inspired the moral of open-source...

Anyway, congratulations for being among the best of scientific communities and damn I appreciate'yall!!

I not sure what is worst, an arrogant client full of demands or anti professional collegues who don't respect you and try to subvert your work

I wonder if youtube channel 'thenewboston' admin (Bucky) a genius or the god of all programming languages??? Respect bro!!! 😎😎😎

As much as I love to complain about my job, I have to say I have such a huge amount of respect for my peers who go out of their way to help me and other engineers out. I feel like they deserve so much more praise because when they help others out, everyone succeeds.

Playing 'old' Flash Player games is my new hobby, I think. Also I suggest "Fancy Pants Adventures" to ones that still play Flash games or like some nostalgia.

Respect to Flash developers, you guys are awesome.

All my respect goes to sysadmins, ive been trying to hack together a cronjob for tha past 2 hours and its still not working.

Always respect de YAGNI principle (You Aren't Gonna Need It). Maybe the hardest thing to follow, as beginner and after.

Programmer OAth. Just read on a github repo

0. I will only undertake honest and moral work. I will stand firm against any requirement that exploits or harms people.

1. I will respect the learnings of those programmers who came before me, and share my learnings with those to come.

2. I will remember that programming is art as well as science, and that warmth, empathy and understanding may outweigh a clever algorithm or technical argument.

3. I will not be ashamed to say "I don't know", and I will ask for help when I am stuck.

4. I will respect the privacy of my users, for their information is not disclosed to me that the world may know.

5. I will tread most carefully in matters of life or death. I will be humble and recognize that I will make mistakes.

6. I will remember that I do not write code for computers, but for people.

7. I will consider the possible consequences of my code and actions. I will respect the difficulties of both social and technical problems.

8. I will be diligent and take pride in my work.

9. I will recognize that I can and will be wrong. I will keep an open mind, and listen to others carefully and with respect.

Haven't ranted in a while so here it goes.

Head of product took me (senior dev) to a high value client workshop/demo session and over the course of two days found the reason behind why the dev team has been pushed to the limit as of late and sales/product team has been making promises to clients without checking with dev leaders on reasonable delivery dates on massive new features.

I tried my best to manage expectations by differing talking about delivery dates by saying "lets discuss that with the team" rather than giving out dates right now. But as soon as the meeting ends he sends an email to the client confirming delivery dates on features that we have done no research on or even specialize in!

Please tell me this is not how well established businesses work or is that the new reality of things. In either case I wanna find a new job :/

Everyone here deals with recruiters.. I get it can't be an easy job but can you at least see where I work at currently??? Im actually one of the devs that take the time to thank you for reaching out even if I'm not interested. Please extend the same respect for my time as I do you.

Fucking recruiters. I get an email followed immediately by a phone call. Ffs can I at least have a little time to read your damn email and THEN call if I'm interested.

Fuck - have some respect that we might be working

Here's a weekly topic suggestion: professionally, whose respect do you want to have?

A friend of mine just called me to ask if I can help him hack an Instagram account... In my head (He's quite aware I lost my dad less than a week ago even if I was an hacker I'll expect and respect some little remorse atleast around moments like this, I would not be expected to do dirty shit at these times). (*heavy sigh here*) (*Million cause words here*) (*hung up*)

Why is the internet such a toxic place... You voice your personal opinion and instantly have people who believe they are 'better' than you call you a stupid consumer because they use something that others may not care for.

Fuck me people, why can't we just have opinions and respect each other, it's not that fucking hard!

I'm starting to learn React.

I have a newfound respect for frontend developers.

Just got yelled at by by a senior dev. I know I am not the best developer but...I am depressed now. I wanna be better and prove myself. I admit I am distracted way to easily but I need help bad. Idk how to earn back the respect of my coWorkers.

It's a toss up between a basic software portal for my old school as a volunteer thing or an old game designed around user content creation.

The portal is more of a personal success but the game was a success in the respect it ended up rolling past a Bethesda employee and he gave me a one on one Skype chat about there design methods.

Recently I tried implementing a 2d grid you could drag (for performance I decided it would auto genetate new grid tiles)

Gotta say, I have a lot more respect for people who try to build this without a framework, I am building it using JavaScript and pixi.js

But man, drawing graphics is hard 😅

It's worth it though, performance is mad 💪

!rant (all ranters should read)

Today I was at university, doing some C low-level stuff. Then I looked my Professor.

Holy fucking shit, this man (and obviously the others) learned programming without google, stackoverflow, youtube and online doc/forum/examples/explanation.
I also believe that some of them could not compile and run at home their software.

MASSIVE RESPECT FOR YOU ALL !

so i decided to check out the client departments jira project page, never have I had more respect for front end developers, don't think I could have the patience for aligning things at pixel accuracy, design qa are ruthless!

After watching The Imitation Game and understanding the Turing machine, I've got so much respect for every single thing a computer can do! 🙂

I honestly have no problems with UI designers, I really don't and actually respect the work they do..

But god dammit, those fucktards should try designing the UI with actual code rather than photoshop or whatever they use these days..

My battery died after a long day. So, I decided to use devRant web for the first time and to be honest with all due respect this website sucks. Most difficult thing about it is navigation.

Respect for the amount of trust that person has on his/her team

Source: Instagram

I respect the patience of mobile application devs...

Respect to the devs of this app, noticed a changelog entry "Improved memory usage".
More devs should take ram consumption into account!

Respect++

"One should respect public opinion in so far as is necessary to avoid starvation and to keep out of prison." - Bertrand Russell

Been worrying about this for a few weeks now.

As a junior dev, how do I continue to improve (with respect to coding style, technique, etc.) when my seniors are only slightly better than me in a technical regard? I feel like I'm improving at a drastically slower pace than when I first started.

🐢

I fuckin give up.
You can't use Android without fuckin gapps, you can but it's fuckin miserable.
And microG still sucks (I respect all the effort from the devs tho)
And there are not enough roms that implement signature spoofing
Almost all the open source apps look like shit and are outdated (also appreciate the devs efforts)
.
.
.
YOU KNOW WHAT GOOGLE JUST TAKE MY DATA
I DONT GIVE A FUCK ANY MORE 😡😤😭
*Flashes Opengapps pico*

!rant
A medal is created on Stack Overflow whenever Jon Skeet performs any action.

Any individual project that made me learn cool stuff...

Maybe the kernelcheck project? It's a shell script that I wrote 2 years ago (it's still on my GitHub but the code looks kinda horrible tbh), and it really made me respect the stability of package managers, and the effort that package maintainers must put into it. Even a single package (the kernel) that you have to maintain the integrity of the .config for (the configuration file that tells you what options to compile in, as a module, or not at all) while on every new minor release, the config changes ever so slightly.. at some point I figured that I'd really need to do those compilations manually, to be able to supervise (and if necessary adjust) it in real-time. The ability for distribution maintainers to do this for thousands of packages.. it boggles my mind. Respect!

Respect

Have been pissed at the guy who wrote the js on the project im working on (its just so messy!). Same project has python scripts I need to look at to squash a bug, and this. code. is. so. clean. They should have let this guy write everything in python. Im ashamed I ever hated on him.

11:30 in my timezone. Was supposed to wrap-up meeting for project finalization 3 hours ago. Sitting here rn, listening to a coworker in management explain the importance of equal respect for all employees in the company. The Boss has left the meeting because he has "better" things to do. FML

I would like to proclaim my utmost love and respect to a programming language and one of its framework.

This language/framework combo was so beautiful that during development I had fantasies about it coming to life as the women I want to marry. I genuinely felt love in my heart to her. I even felt butterflies in my stomach thinking about her!

But I'm worried I might jinx it. So I'm not gonna name it.

I love you.

Who the hell use any instead of a Boolean? Why on earth did I spend 10 months of my life learning a new language (Typescript) for a framework whose writer doesn't even respect their own good practices.

I'm quite shocked today after receiving an email which acknowledges me with so much respect that I cannot handle, I mean this has never happened in my entire life, I can't even handle it

My parents "know" that I build websites. The funny part is the "how" I build them. For them, I call obscure forces and make a sacrifice. And thus, the website is done. So they don't really know how I do it, but I have their deepest respect and pride. Plus, I don't get to fix anyone's printer / computer 😍

Being a cynical bastard and have people respect you for it.

So, if you were supposed to work on a website that is already pretty shitty coded, shitty styled and outdated... Would you go on coding like shit for the sake of consistency or would you embed a new mini-system in it trying to pay some fucking respect to everything you have learned?
Edit: in this scenario, you can actually make a choice haha

I have absolutely no respect for developers who can't properly touch-type.

You don't see many cooks who don't know how to handle a knife, do you?

A 10x engineer without respect for others in the team IMO is a no engineer

I've got a mate at my current work. Most of what we do is insult each other, but there's a real respect there. We were both in similar positions in the company, where we were overworked, underpaid, undervalued and pretty unhappy. He was so helpful when it came to traversing the politics of the company, and how to work out what to do. Plus we get really drunk together all the time. I'm leaving my present company in a few weeks and I'll probably miss having him around the most.

!rant
Just wanted to thank the creators of devRant on the UWP version of the app. A lot of developers don't even consider developing for WP users (they have valid reasons), but on the other hand, the devRant guys...you have my respect and gratitude gentlemen.