Urrrrggghhhh I have an all hands meeting this afternoon and I just don't care...

Which will come first, AI taking our jobs, quantum computing or fusion power?

tl : "hey dotenv, we have a presentation with VP tomorrow, do you want to present any of your achievements in product?"

me: "umm, what achievements ?"

tl : "you know, something that you added in app which made a good impact to various metrics like DAU, MAU, less bad reviews etc"

me: "umm... i coded the tasks and features created by you folks. they got shipped at some point of your liking, and are now being tracked by you for its success failure. So i am not sure what to take credit for"

TL: "no, no.. i mean like any bugs or issues that you fixed outside of your daily jira tasks which you tracked to be a sucess"

me: "well as far as tracking is concerned, then neither i know how to track them nor i did. but yea, i identified a bug where an outdated payload was generating bad request and giving a silent failure instead of success which recently got shipped. maybe its helping users get actual response instead of "we will get back to you in some time" , so this might get considered?

TL : "oh that? that we have already added as one of the team's achievements (=PM+TL's achievement) and have tracked it to be a succes"

me : "what th- okay. then how about that api failure which was identified by AVP as "something is not right" in which the api was intermittently taking a long time to respond. he tagged me and i set up logs to identify which type of users got that issue and the actual cause of that api failure. that was definitely a good fox for app as we ended up with good reviews on playstore for our new release?"

TL : "oh that? how can you take credit for that fix? it was identified by AVP, you just added similar logs that we were using for tracking errors and implemented a fix when it came to you as a sprint task? its a team achievement"

me : "but you guys didn't identified the cause through your logs!? my log was more granular. and even if that's the case, we aren't allowed to pick any task just as is, without getting it added to sprint , right?"

TL : "nah, that was a team win"

*6 months later, during appraisal time"
TL : "Hey dotenv, you haven't displayed any leadership skills and haven't gone put of the box to improve the product. Here's your peanut appraisal 🗑️"

me : 🥲🔫🤯🪦

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fuck this stupid neaurocrst structure. i hate being a selfish prick than a team player, but either give credits as well as punishment to the team or gove credits as well as punishment to the single person. but wtf is thos culture of giving reward to team and punishment to individual? fckin communists

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If you ever decide to become a manager, I hope every time you sit down, your chair makes a farting sound, but just once, so you can’t repeat it to demonstrate that it was in fact your chair and not yourself.

Kiki's meme of the day

Kiki’s meme of the day… the zoom thing hits way too hard

Throw it in the trash

MS Teams sending an email to inform me about people which "are trying to reach me", one hour after I already talked with those people via Teams chat.
🤦‍♂️

<dir>/index.tsx sucks. They don't show up very well on IDEs.

I do and will always pirate, unless it’s low-budget indie and I can support the creator directly

Choose your gender

When teammates mostly work a lot of overtime and doing it becomes an expectation, time to run

What I need is an automatic banner that pops up at the top of the screen, saying:
YOU'RE ON THE WRONG BRANCH YOU RETARD
In big red letters.
No idea how to go about automating that, and I suspect it would probably be on the screen more or less permanently, but I reckon it's a useful tool.

FUCK JEST. ITS ALL SHIT. I CANT HAVE A DIFFERENT MOCK RESULT FOR ONE TEST AND KEEP THE OTHERS THE SAME WITHOUT REWRITING THEM.

THIS IS THE REASON NOBODY REALLY WANTS TO DO TESTS, NOT BECAUSE THEYRE STUPID BUT BECAUSE THE FRAMEWORKS ARE THE PINNACLE OF CANCER THEMSELVES.

My job is introducing a new system to (legally) avoid some taxes for the employees and get then more netto compensation. But in the meantime, they have removed all benefits of having a (free) home office. No free screens, no free chair, no free keyboard/mouse, ...

Your three-second password retry delay is far more likely to annoy users than preventing a brute-force attack.

If you insist on a retry delay, let the user enter a password five times without any delay. This would make no difference in the grand scheme, the trillions of retries needed for a brute-force attack, and guessing a password takes longer than three seconds of thinking anyway.

Another alternative is a tenth of the password retry delay but one added character. One added character slows down a brute-force attack by at least sixty-two (62) times, so one more character but a tenth of the password retry delay would still mean more than six (6) times the protection against brute-forcing.

On Linux, the password retry delay can thankfully be reduced by changing a value inside /etc/pam.d/common-auth or /etc/pam.d/login (out of scope for this post, you can search online for more details).

A && B && !C ? x : A && C ? y : x

What i learned from using JSP: They were actually called “Java’s Satanic Pages”. Sun had to scrub it from docs because Satan threatened to sue them for defamation.

facebook for iOS rn (:

Boys vs Men

I really need to learn to think through how many stitches I’m putting into the first row of a project.

- Takes over an hour to do one row
- Already used more than 2k yards on it and it’s not even short blanket length yet (though width is ridiculous)

OH MY FUCKING GOD. I HATE
H A T E

ACQUIA SITE STUDIO.

"Let's make a low-code 'solution' for developers who barely can stand working on Drupal as it is, and make the completely easy and perfect process of styling a website, COMPLETELY UNBEARABLE!"

Yea this is a great idea, experienced developers can now spend hours trying to fucking find where a single style is coming from. Oh it was too easy to cmd+f a stylesheet or a codebase to find something particular? Yea FUCK THAT. Lets turn EVERY SINGLE STYLE into a unsearchable .yml file where every style definition is now a machine hash. WAY easier to use. Isn't it so cool to fucking click on styles from a dropdown where they come off the edge of the screen. FUCK whichever stupid fuck came up with this dog shit nonsense. I fucking HATE this soul crushing work.

You don’t have a choice

> "Just keep your battery charge between 25% and 75%, bro! It will slow the wearing of your non-replaceable battery!"

So you want me to artificially halve my useable battery capacity just so its actual capacity reduces slower?

That's the insanity with non-replaceable batteries.

A user-replaceable battery is almost like a battery that never dies. No effort wasted with tedious "battery care". No worries about weardown from high usage. Just enjoying using the device.

Seeing posts about standards vs implementation of compilers. People not getting that "standards release" != "vendor release" for C++ compilers.

me irl

No I will not use Facebook to schedule an appointment.

If you're unwilling to answer the phone and do it yourself, I'm more than willing to take my business elsewhere.

> "A flat design UI reduces cognitive load!"

Oh really, Google? If that is your aim, then how come you increase cognitive load by making pull-to-refresh mandatory on your mobile web browser, which constantly has to be avoided by the user?

This close 🤏 to make a shitposting account on Linkedin

I'm tired of taking breaks, only to find bugs IRL.

I draw the line at my grapes throwing an exception!

Debugging the crane game app, my ISPs aggro DHCPv6 query vs their WAN6 scripting and the label printer at Quest Labs was annoying enough.

I don't even know how to tag this.

A day ago I tried ordering a coffee and doughnut on Doordash. I thought, I must be too tired/missing something. Dunkin' Donuts didn't have doughnuts on the menu, despite the header of "Donuts and Bakery", I called them... A few minutes later the reason was found. Their PoS system upgraded, changing the formatting of the doughnut options so a minor bug caused it to show as fully updated, despite actually disabling the doughnut menu options... today it's the weirdest, possibly inappropriate-looking, grape I've ever seen... and I grow 5 varieties of grapes. Maybe if I get drunk enough(wine?) later, I'll be able to not debug or re-engineer anything for a few hours.

Any suggestions on how to stop iterating through a debugging loop IRL 24/7 is certainly welcolmed.

Now, wtf do I do with this, mildy disturbing, grape?