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Search - "clown managers"
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managers: We're all aligned! Let's work as a team and get this started!
devs: ok...
managers and devs meeting to discuss next features: * canceled by managers *
managers: (word for word, can't make this shit up) we cancelled the meeting, we will define the roadmap for everyone
> WE will define the roadmap for EVERYONE
devs: uh wtf???
one hour later, managers: guys we are defining the roadmap can we have a call to discuss?
fucking asshat, insolent, disrespectful pieces of shit3 -
Managers: wE wAnT tO bE LeAn aNd MoVe FaSt As PoSsIBLe wiTh NeW FeAtUrEs
Same Managers: Can you make this icon 2 pixels smaller?! Shift this element left?! Swap out this icon?! Use a different color here?! A perfect feature and design is critical!!!!!!
FullStackClown: You can either be lean and fast, or be fucking nitpicking clowns 🤡 about this stuff and slow us all down. Choose one.
Managers: ...
FullStackClown: Sit down and shut up7 -
Why do managers always want to fucking "discuss"? If you had literally a first-grader's education in basic electronics, you could define tasks and tickets by yourself and not have to fumble around all day and fuck it up,13
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Clown manager put three juniors (and ”senior” dev on work visa) on new project.
They will never finish it.
It’s too hard for them with some legacy dynamically created complex database queries which will spook the hell out of them!
But managers like, ”it’s going to be good” and ”making good progress”.
Fuck no! Putting juniors together? With little support? It such a waste. They spent weeks just to get even the slightest progress.
No best practise. No tests. Just hacking away.
It’s a failure of the management! We fail our juniors and they will quit as soon as they get the chance and they feel like they have some wind under their wings.
”It’s going to be good”
Pff. Clowns leading this company.1 -
Original spec of feature: 5 page document
Review of feature: 20 page document with surprise things never mentioned in original spec
"fullStackClown!?!?! how could you miss this?!?!"
🤡5 -
We find our hero, fullstackclown🤡, again harrowed by idiotic management.
Our backdrop and set: A Google calendar appointment was booked between the managers and fullstackclown. fullstackclown had created an all-day appointment for today which reads: "fullstackclown on site".
With the scene set, let us begin our tale..........
Manager: Are you going to be on site today?
fullstackclown🤡: Do you see the appointment I booked on our calendar stating that indeed I will be on site today?
Manager: ...
fullstackclown🤡: you are an absolute idiot
Manager: ...
I literally don't know what to do anymore. I mean it's RIGHT THERE IN YOUR CALENDAR. HOW MUCH MORE CLEAR DO YOU WANT IT TO BE?! DO YOU WANT A TWILIO APP THAT SENDS YOU A PRERECORDED VOICE MESSAGE IN MY VOICE, CONFIRMING MY CALENDAR APPOINTMENTS?!
What type of mindset causes this type of behavior of double or triple checking things as simple as a calendar booking? Honestly shows a complete breakdown of normal mental functioning in my opinion.5 -
many of you have probably been skeptical this entire time of what i am capable of with a keyboard and a monitor
i guarantee what you are about to see is far beyond 99% of what can be found in SiLiCoN vALLeY salad bar tech bros, and probably what 99% of you can write
take some time to understand this code, like REALLY understand it...
if you can't, that's fine. come back in 5 years.
here it is:
https://typescriptlang.org/play/...
this is what 10+ years of busting your ass (and i mean really busting, its fucking 7 PM on a saturday for me) can look like
another reason you can understand it's infuriating listing to rubes ramble "we can't hire you because you dont have <<arbitrary number of years>> with <<arbitrary language>>" absolute clowns - or listening to managers who are "smart" yeah ok buddy
i am ChatGPT-10+. bow down to my superintelligence. we don't need LLMs because I am 5+ iterations ahead
also if you don't understand the significance of this code, it's on you
any clown i've ever seen, whether it be on twitter, facebook, insta, here on dev rant, hackernews, or whereever, just know, i know you're full of shit, and i've worked harder. that is all.
anyway, i'm finally done for the day, cheers 🥃16